


Our Home: DMMd Domestic Ficlets Collection

by Shinocchi



Series: Prompts & Requests [1]
Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Anal Sex, Angry Sex, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Drabble Collection, Fluff and Angst, Hate Sex, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Multiple Pairings, Orgasm Denial, Post-Canon, Public Sex, Violent Sex, Warning of Possible Noncon depiction, Workplace
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-10
Packaged: 2018-01-06 05:26:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 116
Words: 170,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1102941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinocchi/pseuds/Shinocchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Contains ficlets and drabbles written for multiple pairings as well as various ficlets from Tumblr requests surrounding the domestic theme.<br/>Updates will be done randomly. Please be aware that some of the drabbles may contain triggers, do refer to the warnings in the author notes.</p><p>For easy navigation, I would suggest to refer to <a href="http://shinocchidesu.net/fanfictions">my story list</a> page where you could find summaries of each stories depending on which pairing you're interested in :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Christmas Warmth; Noiz/Aoba

**Author's Note:**

> Christmas-themed NoiAo drabble written for tumblr user [misteques](http://misteques.tumblr.com/) as part of the DMMd Secret Santa Project :)
> 
> Merry Christmas & hope you like this short scribble <3

The word “Christmas” was a foreign word for both Noiz and Aoba. Midorijima did not have the tradition for Christmas celebration, and Noiz had left Germany too long to have a vivid memory of the local Christmas celebration. Although he briefly remembered the annoying noises outside his room when he was still young and locked, he never had a positive impression towards the festive season.

After Noiz and Aoba started residing in Germany, it dawned to them that perhaps they should attempt celebrating Christmas together, hoping that they can create more memories together. They celebrated their first year of Christmas locally, in which Noiz brought Aoba out for a fancy dinner during Christmas Eve (which ended up with Aoba being drunk) and they had a good stroll in town admiring attractive Christmas decorations and trying out local Christmas delicacies.

Their first year of Christmas was sweet. Both of them bought matching earmuffs for each other as their Christmas presents.

On their second year of stay in Germany, Noiz decided to celebrate Christmas with Aoba in London. They took a flight to the European country a month earlier because they wanted to explore around the place while waiting for the arrival of Christmas.

They celebrated white Christmas for the first time in their life. And they bought matching rabbit-shaped necklace for each other as their Christmas presents.

The third year of Christmas was slightly different. This time, they were joined by families and friends. Tae, Koujaku, Clear, and Mizuki flew over to Germany to celebrate Christmas with them. Noiz’s brother joined in the celebration as well. Even after years of acquaintance, Koujaku and Noiz never stop their bickering. They fought over what they should put up on the Christmas tree; what dishes to prepare for Christmas dinner; and even what color theme should their attire be on Christmas night. Their fights were only resolved by a furious Tae, who shouted at them saying that they will never grow up.

Their third Christmas celebration was warm. Both of them bought matching scarves for each other as their Christmas presents.

As the years went by, celebrating Christmas had become a tradition for both of them. They started to involve their families and friends in their Christmas celebration. It became a day where they share their affection with their loved ones. It was also a day where they felt the warmth of being surrounded by families and friends.

Christmas became an important day for them. It became a reason for part of their happiness.

On their last Christmas celebration, they sat cuddled on their couch in the living room, fingers intertwined. They reminisce on all the past Christmas celebrations they had gone through, feeling instant warmth indulging them. Aoba let his head fell on Noiz’s shoulder. Both of them had gray hairs and their skins were wrinkled. But they were happy. They smiled as they looked at all the Christmas presents they had given each other for the past eighty years. The earmuffs still hang on top of their television; the rabbit-shaped necklace still hang around their necks; the scarves wrapping their necks as they hugged each other, sharing their body warmth.

They came a long way. They had celebrated Christmas with each other every year without fail. They had created so many memories together it has become hard for them to remember every single one of them. As Aoba flipped through the photo album which all their Christmas memories were recorded, he smiled, eyes wet. Noiz tightened his embrace and pulled him closer, placing his hand on Aoba’s head before pulling him in gently for a soft but intimate kiss.

Noiz and Aoba never knew how Christmas felt like when they first met. But now, they had their own definition of Christmas –  ** _HAPPINESS_.**


	2. Unsettled Link; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Koujaku wasn't the first person Noiz turned to, but he'll become one eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A scene I took off from [Proof of Being Alive](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1076281).  
> Took place during the three days disappearance of Noiz from Koujaku's life.
> 
> Decided to post it as part of drabble collections because I feel bad for the lacked of Aoba in my KouNoi fics sobs.

“I’m going off now!”

Aoba dashed out of Heibon, waving and rushed onto the streets. He’d promised Red to be home earlier today. Ren would be attempting cooking for the first time and Aoba wanted to be there to witness this significant once-in-a-lifetime moment.

He stopped a while to catch his breath, slowing down as he saw his house came into view. A bright smile appeared on his face reflexively but the beam changed into a confused gape the moment he realized there was an uninvited guest leaning against his house gate. 

“Noiz! What’re you doing here?” 

He ran towards the younger man, immediately frowning as he caught sight of the blood dripping down his bandaged hand. 

“Did you start a fight—ah, no, this was from last time, right?” 

He lifted Noiz’s hand up gently, put it closer to his eyes for a better look and made a face at the blood-filled bandage. Ignoring Noiz’s reluctance, Aoba dragged Noiz into the house, forcing him to sit down and hurried into the kitchen. 

“Welcome home, Aoba.” They were greeted by Ren’s deep voice as Aoba rushed back to Noiz and took off the bloodied bandage carefully, revealing a horrifying-looking wound. 

Noiz heard a faint mutter of _that stupid hippo_ before he shifted his attention to a confused-looking Ren, who was wearing an apron and standing beside both of them. 

“Aoba, what happened?” Ren asked, eyes fixed on the wound which is now wrapped under thick layers of clean bandages. 

“That stupid hippo! I asked him to keep an eye on Noiz!” Aoba yelled. _Yup, he heard it right._  

Aoba furiously tied a knot on the bandage, ending the wound treatment and – finally – turned and looked at Ren. 

“Ah, sorry, Ren. I’m supposed to help you out, right?” Aoba said apologetically. Standing up, he shot a quick peek at the kitchen and smiled awkwardly at Noiz, who instantly felt out-of-place. 

“….I’m leaving.” 

Noiz stood up, intending to leave the place but Aoba pulled him back and forced him to sit on the couch again. 

“You’re having dinner with us today.” Aoba announced with a voice so firmed Noiz instantly felt subjugated. 

“It’s okay.” Noiz stood up again and took quick steps towards the door. “I’ve got plans.” 

Aoba hurried towards him and pulled him back, the grip on his wrist tightened as he shot him an angry glare. Even after the whole Toue disaster, Aoba still felt a strong sense of responsibility towards Noiz; the fact that he knew Noiz better now heightened the need, making him to constantly put up an older-brother front whenever Noiz acted like a rebellious brat. 

Like now. 

“Don’t lie to me, brat.” 

Noiz almost pouted at him but feeling the need to uphold the final bit of dignity left inside him, he shifted his gaze elsewhere instead. 

Aoba grinned victoriously when Noiz sat unwillingly at the end of the couch, playfully poking at his newly bandaged hand, a scowl obvious between his brows. The teen-ish action plastered a fond smile on Aoba’s face as he ruffled the brat’s hair, earning an irritated sweep of hand from Noiz and they started tackling each other into a fight. 

They were so indulged with their playful “attacks” until Tae stormed out of the kitchen, screaming at them and urging Aoba and Ren to get to work. 

The uncomfortable sense of unfitting hit Noiz again. While both Aoba and Ren tried to dodge another frying pan attack from Tae, he slowly moved towards the door. His hand was already on the door knob when he felt a strong grip on his wrist again. 

“Trying to run away, huh?” Aoba’s voice was dangerously low. Noiz sighed loudly and turned around to stare annoyingly at Aoba. 

“What do you want?” 

“Stay for dinner.” 

“I said it’s fine.” 

“I insist.” 

“I don’t wanna.” 

Aoba’s eyes brightened at the frankness, surprised at how honest Noiz sounded when the brat rejected him. He thought it was another one of those reluctant yet unwilling to admit side of Noiz but apparently it was not the case this time. He was a bit slow to realize that but when he finally did, he sighed softly and took out his coil. 

“What’re you doing?” Noiz looked as Aoba scrolled through his recently contacted list and felt his eyes twitched when his saw his scroll stopped at an overly familiar name.

“If you’re not comfortable with me helping you, I’ll get you someone else.” Aoba said casually. He waited patiently with a clearly disgruntled Noiz until someone picked up the call, and that was when his tolerance level broke. 

“Hello? Kouja—“ 

The rest of Aoba’s voice was cut off as Noiz stormed out of the house, slamming the door shut behind him and strolled off to the streets. He took a different, unfamiliar route, intending to ease the agitation deep within him. Nothing caught his interest, nothing but ways to settle down his complicated and unknown emotions now washing over his head. 

Raindrops started falling on him and he looked up, wanted to find a place for shelter when his attention was captured by an annoying outline of a man. Koujaku was running under the rain, covering his head with his sleeves and heading towards the direction of Aoba’s house. Noiz looked at him from afar, his gaze unmoving and complex; but he turned away after seconds of long-gazing, his body drenched from head to toe and headed to the opposite direction, unaware that Koujaku had stopped running halfway and turned around the moment he walked away, thinking if the glimpse of green he saw seconds before was merely a trick of his eyes.

 

The next time he saw Koujaku was three days later.. 

“Yo,” Noiz raised a bloody hand and waved at Koujaku, giving him a satisfied smirk upon seeing the painful cringe on his face.

 

That was when he realized this new "guardian" could be a great addition to his life too.


	3. Home; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noiz & Aoba create their own definition of home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I miss writing cute, fluffy OTP ;w;

Noiz’s workload is crazy.

 

His crazy schedule has taken over him just recently. Aoba only manages to see him for less than ten minutes for the past week and it’s starting to worry him. He waits for him every night, refusing to go to bed until past midnight; and he tries his best to wake up as early as he could just to find the bed being too huge for him again. He never asks Noiz what’s happening. One of the rare chances where Noiz manages to spend a most thirty minutes at home, he simply allows him to lean on him, burying his head in the older man’s shoulder and catching a brief ten minutes of sleep before he jolts awake and rushes out of the house again. 

Now the house is a bit too…huge for him.

Aoba could no longer remember exactly how many times he has told himself to tolerate with the situation. He knows Noiz has more responsibilities now, and _he_ is undoubtedly one of the most important and heaviest responsibilities he has to bear. He could no longer remember how many times he tries to brush the word “burden” off his head; he knows Noiz never sees him as a burden, and he knows he’s genuinely happy he’s here with him now. He knows. He knows that it’s just his nerve talking. 

But it’s impossible to ignore this anxiety. 

There must be something he can do. He tries not to think too much about it; but being paranoid as usual, he knows it’s impossible for him to _not_ think about it, especially when Noiz is so important to him; and especially when they’ve committed to each other. 

So he decided to do that one thing he always wants to do. 

Noiz might not have the time for him; but _he_ has the time for Noiz. He has all the time in the world for Noiz. He knows Noiz might not agree with the idea, but at this point of time, he don’t think the brat has the right to say anything. 

It’s his decision; as like how he decided to follow him here.

 

 

It’s already past midnight when Aoba stands under the corporation building, wrapping in heavy winter coats and shivering under the cold. His hands are frozen, his nose ice-cold, and he breathes white mist out as he steps into the building. It takes some time for him to convince the security guard that his _husband_ is working in the building and that he has been working overtime for the day and he simply _needs_ to deliver his overly late dinner for him. The security guard is suspicious – _of course_ – but he finally allows him in after Aoba flashes their wedding photo as he pouts and blushes at the guard’s insensibility. 

Aoba walks into the elevator and presses the lift button frantically as he continues scrubbing his hands together for warmth. _Did Noiz bring his winter coat out today? Did he eat lunch?_ Countless questions run through his head while he waits for the elevator to stop, mostly Noiz; all _Noiz_. 

The elevator finally reaches its destination and Aoba hurries out, running to the end of the corridor and finally finds the door with the name plate “Noiz” significantly attached on it. He knocks softly. 

“Noiz? It’s me.” 

There’s no answer. 

He knocks again. No answer. He wants to call out again but the darkness surrounding him plus his own echoes is starting to scare him; so he turns the doorknob, hears a click, and pushes the door open. 

It’s dark. Noiz’s office is huge and very vacant. There’s nothing in the room that represents the former Rhyme player. The lights are off and Aoba walks further in to find a dim light in the innermost of the room. There’s where he finds Noiz sleeping, on the table. He must’ve fallen asleep halfway through work. Smiling, Aoba feels a prick of pain in his chest – “Aww, poor guy is overworking.” - as he takes Noiz’s winter coat from the couch and put it over the blonde, who merely fidgets a bit and continues sleeping. He’s so unarmed; and so innocent-looking it’s almost endearing. 

It’s probably not a good idea to wake him up, not that Aoba has the heart to either. Aoba looks around the table and spots a picture of them taken during their honeymoon nicely framed and positioned on the table. He smiles and takes it off for a better look, grinning brightly as he slowly caresses the pouting Noiz in the picture, who is wearing a pair of lime-green rabbit ears, clearly being forced upon by the grinning blue-haired man beside him. 

He puts the picture back on the table and goes back to the real-life Noiz. Bending down, he kisses Noiz gently on the cheek and is preparing to help him tidy up his desk when Noiz mutters in his sleep. 

“Aoba…..” 

The warmth pooling in Aoba’s chest is too unbearable. He leans down again and gently wraps Noiz into his arms, trying hard not to wake him up. Noiz must be very tired. He doesn’t move an inch even when Aoba leans his head against his. 

The familiar and nostalgic voice rings hazily as he sleeps on.

 

“ _I’m here_.”

 

\--

 

When he wakes up few hours later, he’s greeted by a packet of food on his neatly cleaned table and an order by his brother to take the day off. He’s about to clear his doubts with his brother but the thought disappears the moment he sees the small note on top of his food container. 

“ _Remember to eat. I’ll come again tomorrow._ ” 

He smiles.

 

And that’s when he realizes he really needs to go home before his office turns into a second home for both him and Aoba. 

 

 


	4. A Better Job; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba's first day of work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One can only contain that certain amount of need for more OTP love.

****

It was Aoba’s first day of work.

 

After much debate with Noiz, the jobless man finally gave in to Noiz’s proposal and allowed himself to be positioned in his company, in which he would be assisting him with his workload, personally. Noiz’s workload was crazy; but he was intelligent, and he was an instinctive strategist. He did all the necessary arrangement beforehand and offered – no, _informed_ – the blue-haired man that he'd found him a job. In his company. 

Aoba had conflicted feelings when Noiz told him about it. It was definitely good to be able to see Noiz in a constant basis so that he could _properly_ take care of him. But again, there were also other things that concerned him – would people be comfortable with their relationship? No, first of all, is it even _appropriate_ for people to know about their relationship? Noticing Aoba’s reluctances, Noiz clutched his hand firmly, reassuring him that it would be fine and that he wanted him to work with him. There was no way Aoba could refuse such a blunt and sincere request, especially when it came from Noiz. 

_But still_. 

At 6.00 a.m. in the morning, Aoba woke Noiz up roughly. Noiz took a glance at the usagimodoki clock on their bedside table and rolled away, grunting groggily about still being early and falling back to sleep. Aoba pouted, dissatisfied with the lacked of cooperation, and headed straight into the bathroom to start preparing. 

At 8.00 a.m. Noiz finally woke up. Realizing the absence of his usual source of warmth, he sat up, sleepy-eyed, and walked into the bathroom. Aoba had just got out of the shower; his hair was still damped but he’d already had his formal attire on as he struggled to work his tie out. Noiz wanted to hug him from the back and give him a morning kiss when Aoba dodged him and pushed him into the shower, throwing a towel at him and yelling at him saying that they were gonna be late. 

8.00 a.m. was the usual time Noiz woke up, though. 

At 9.30 a.m. Noiz pulled the car out of their garage with Aoba sitting at the passenger seat, hands clenched into a fist on his lap and staring blankly on the street ahead. He suddenly felt a surge of regret and he got so self-conscious he started to doubt if he was even good enough for the job, for the company, for Noiz, for everything; even though Noiz never stopped assuring him that it was more than enough to just be himself. 

At 10.00 a.m. Noiz led him into the giant corporation building, up to the level where they would now be working together, every day. Aoba had visited the place occasionally, sometimes to deliver food for Noiz; sometimes to wait for him to finish his work. But the circumstance today was different. _So much different_. 

Noiz was pulled into a meeting the moment he stepped into the office, leaving Aoba standing awkwardly, unsure of what he should do. He was about to ask around when a pretty girl – which appeared to be Noiz’s secretary – directed him to a cubicle office down the hall. 

At 12.00 p.m. Noiz finally got out of his meeting. Aoba was about to approach him for lunch but he was one step too late. The girl from before stepped up to him the moment she saw her boss _. I would need to get use to this_ , Aoba wondered as he sank back to his seat and watched from afar. They were smiling and talking happily with each other. _Yeah, I can get use to this_ , Aoba told himself, the nervousness slowly leaving him as he observed. Then, the girl wrapped her hands around Noiz’s arm, leaning against him in the same time. That was when Aoba started to feel a huge surge of anger pooling in him. No, he was pretty sure this wasn’t anger. It was _jealousy_. Did Noiz have to deal with this every single day? Wasn’t he the only one who can touch Noiz? Wasn’t Noiz _his_? 

Aoba’s mind went into a state of mess and he turned his gaze away from the “couple”, trying not to think about unnecessary things like “they look more like a normal, better couple” when he heard footsteps coming his way. 

“Aoba.” 

It was his voice. 

“What?” Aoba answered in a rather harsh way. 

“Come.” The voice demanded. 

Looking up, he saw Noiz standing right beside his cubicle. _She_ stood next to him, still having that – annoying – charming smile as she stared at him. With Noiz now as his direct boss, he couldn’t say no to a direct order, right? He stood up, irritation obvious on his face but before he could shoot Noiz with another “what?”, the younger man leaned in and kissed him on the lips, instantly stealing the words away from him. 

“Y-You…..” Aoba’s face was bright red. He did it again; here, of all places. _He did it again_. 

“I still haven’t gotten my morning kiss yet.” Noiz said as he leaned in again, face dangerously close to his. 

Everyone was staring. _Everyone_. 

But Noiz had made his point clear. He’d just announced to the whole world that Aoba was his, with the most upfront and most effective way. 

 

He did it again. He always did. In his very own, _unique_ way.

 

 

 

 


	5. Bloodied Night; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes they like it gentle; but there are also times where they like it rough and wet. 
> 
> Like tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was taking a rest from writing another story so I used a number generator to randomize a number from these [erotic prompts](http://ririmania1335.deviantart.com/art/250-Erotic-Prompts-393354157). It landed on number 17. 
> 
>    
> I think I just found a good way for my incubation process lmao
> 
> tw: possible Noncon depiction & blood & violence; slight drunk sex (though Koujaku was probably very much conscious)
> 
> Established relationship & post-canon. I wrote this base on the assumption that they'd had regular sex and they'd had it in the last 24 hours. I don't think Noiz or Koujaku would purposely hurt the other party so yeah. I missed out this point in the fic and I would like to apologize for any discomfort and confusion caused. Just to make things clear, this pairing can be vague at times but in this context, they have both consented and Koujaku got his revenge after that.

It was their usual night out. Every now and then, they would spend some time downtown. The way they made their decision was always random. Sometimes they found themselves in a fancy restaurant with a quixotic mood; but there were also days like today where they just wanted to get wild in a chaotic bar. Gulping down the twelfth cup of beer, Koujaku settled the beer cup roughly on the table and shouted at the bartender for more. Noiz put his own beer cup down and collapsed on the table, small laughs barely audible through the surrounding noises.

“What’s the matter? Reaching your limit already?” Koujaku taunted, his hand encircling the blonde’s shoulder and shaking him unsympathetically.

“Shut up, old man.” Noiz swiftly swept the older man’s hand away and closed his eyes, feeling his consciousness slowly drifting away.

“C’mon, don’t be such a party pooper.” Ignoring Noiz’s reluctance to join him, Koujaku shook him again until the brat looked up at him, eyes steamy and face flushed. 

Koujaku was about to mock him further until he realized how menacing Noiz’s expression was. He knew that look well, in fact, _too_ well. It was the stare he always gave him when he was looking for a release of some sort; and most of the time, the only opinions he would accept from Koujaku were words of mercy or destructive actions that could override his. 

“You wanna know what a real party is?” Noiz smirked, moving his head closer to Koujaku’s face and breathed fervently in his face as he muttered in his ear. “Let’s have a _real_ party, shall we?” 

He stood up, grabbed Koujaku’s wrist and marched towards the washroom, pushing crowds aside and earning frustrating grunts and curses along the way. Koujaku wanted to retort; but the fact that he had willingly allowed Noiz to haul him across the room proved that he had been betrayed by his own body. He wasn’t in the perfect condition to think, anyway; so he was more than happy for what was left of his sanity to help him make the choice.

They were both tipsy, and they were both in need. 

Noiz kicked the washroom door open and smirked at the vacancy. Pushing Koujaku into an unoccupied cubicle, he began to stripe him ruthlessly. 

“Oi, brat, stop. We’re outside.” 

“Do you think I care?” 

“Someone might hear us.” 

“Tch, you talk too much, old man.” Noiz scowled and thrust his tongue into Koujaku’s mouth, sucking at it roughly and biting it hard enough to draw blood. 

Koujaku moaned deafeningly into Noiz’s mouth upon feeling the taste of rust. He didn’t have the time to push Noiz away when he felt Noiz grab his half-hard dick, pumping it strongly and harshly it was almost painful. 

“Heh, I haven’t done anything yet and you’re hard already? Perverted old man.” Noiz teased, his pumps getting faster and rougher. 

“Ugh, shut up, brat. If you want to do it, at least keep your voice down. Ouch!” 

Noiz seemed to be forbidding him from talking because the moment Koujaku opened his mouth, he sank his teeth into his neck, biting it until he tasted blood and sucking and licking on it as he spread the red liquid all over Koujaku’s neck. Then, he carved another mark on Koujaku’s collarbone, causing Koujaku to cry out loud and clawed on Noiz’s now bared back. It’s not enough, Noiz thought as he bit him harder, his hand pumped harder and he positioned his erected member against the old man’s entrance before he gave it a violent thrust, entering Koujaku right after he'd make sure that he was still loose enough from their lovemaking session just before they decided to leave for the bar.

Koujaku let out an ear-splitting scream as he sank his nails deeper into Noiz’s back, feeling the wet sensation on his finger and knowing that that was Noiz’s blood. Noiz gave out a small grin from the reaction and started to thrust harder, his mouth sucking and biting on the older man’s throat while his other hand reached out to pull on Koujaku’s hair, drawing another loud cry from the Rib player. 

“Fuck, Noiz!” That was the only thing Koujaku could get out of his mouth before he leaned towards the brat’s face and plunged his tongue into his mouth to bite on his tongue piercing, the only place he knew would draw the pain out of him. Noiz gave out a soft grunt. He pushed Koujaku roughly towards the wall, the hitting pressure so strong Koujaku felt ache spreading across his back, realizing that he must had hit on something rough and rigid. He separated their kiss to rest from the stinging sensation but Noiz, sensing a chance, clenched Koujaku's throat and pushed his head backwards, causing him to smash his head on the bricked wall and instantly felt his vision flicker. Not only that he had to endure the pain from all over his body – now including his head – he also had to bear the suffocating, choking pressure of Noiz’s hand squeezing his throat. He was in such a daze he no longer knows if he felt more pain or bliss anymore. 

 _Click_. 

Their eyes widened. Someone had just come in. Swallowing, Koujaku looked at Noiz in horror, but Noiz’s expression merely switched from a slightly distracted one to a devilish one as he whispered in Koujaku’s ear. 

“Ah, looks like we got ourselves a guest.” Koujaku trembled from Noiz’s words, both from fear and pleasure. “Let’s show them how much we love each other, shall we?” 

Using his remaining strength, Koujaku grasped Noiz’s jaws and breathed raggedly into his face. “Don’t fucking joke with me, you—“ 

The loud moan replaced his remaining words immediately as Noiz started thrusting again. Still had his mouth beside Koujaku’s ear, he blew warm air into it as Koujaku covered his mouth to stifle the moans. 

“I told you I don’t care. And I don’t plan to stop either.” 

The last thing Koujaku remembered after that night was someone forcefully opening the cubicle’s door and Noiz darkened eyes, full with lust and heat.

 

If he ever died of heart attack, it would be the brat’s fault.

 

 


	6. Zusatz; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day when Koujaku realized Noiz is changing his life...again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning that there's (implied)mpreg in this drabble. It's up to you whether you want to burst Koujaku's bubble or not lol
> 
> I wrote this long time ago (I found it in my "use-if-you-are-unsure" folder) and could possibly be one of the excerpts I extracted out from one of my other writings or one of the potential excerpts I wanted to include in future kounoi fics but.... I guess it's fine as a stand-alone too lol
> 
> It's tough living an OT3 life because when I'm writing noiao, I miss kounoi and kouao, and vice versa.

 

Wiping the last table clean, Koujaku took a quick look outside. The sky was cloudy and it would probably rain soon. He’d forgotten his umbrella this morning and it was bad news to have rain attacking him at this time. Hastily putting the chairs back in their places, he rushed out of the shop and headed straight home, only to find his front door unlocked.

“Tch, how many times do I need to remind him to lock the door?” 

Clicking his tongue, he pushed the door leading to the bedroom open and saw the familiar blonde laying sprawled across his bed. 

“You left the door unlocked again.” He scolded. 

Noiz simply turned around and looked at the hairdresser before he turned his back towards him, causing Koujaku to scowl and click his tongue again as he started undressing and walked into the bathroom. The brat had been acting weird lately. He wasn’t particularly vocal to begin with, but recently he had become quieter and there were times when Koujaku suspected that he’d purposely avoided him for unknown reasons. 

Walking out of the bathroom with only a towel over his waist, he saw Noiz curled up at the side of the bed. He wasn’t sleeping, but he was obviously lost in thought. He didn’t even realize it when Koujaku sat beside him until the older man ruffled his hair. 

“What’s wrong, brat?” Koujaku asked. 

Noiz was silent for a while, then he sat up. There was definitely something wrong with him, the wavering emotions Koujaku saw from his eyes had confirmed it. 

“Something’s wrong with me.” Noiz confessed. 

“I know. That’s why I’m asking you.” Koujaku said as he pulled Noiz closer but Noiz pushed him away and hugged his knees instead. 

“I feel…weird.” Noiz continued, his gaze avoiding Koujaku’s intentionally. 

“Are you sick?” Koujaku asked again, trying to probe the situation out of Noiz. 

“I don’t know.” 

Noiz buried his head in between his knees and Koujaku reached out and pulled him into a hug. He’d only seen Noiz acting like that once and it was the time when he felt himself not being normal enough for Koujaku. Thanks to the experience, he’d realized soon enough that the same problem had arisen. 

“C’mon, Noiz. Do we need to go through this again?” Koujaku assured as he patted Noiz on the head gently. “I’d told you that if you need help with understanding something, you just need to describe it to me.” He lifted Noiz’s head and cupped his face. “You can do it now. I’m ready to listen.” 

Noiz stared into Koujaku’s eyes for a brief moment before he spoke. 

“I can’t eat much lately, and I don’t feel comfortable. I get tired too easily and worst of all,” Noiz placed his hand on his stomach. “I keep feeling something pulsing here.” 

Koujaku gaped at Noiz. 

Wait, what? 

“There’s something wrong with my body. I’m suspecting a tumor of some sort.” Noiz ended and as soon as he saw Koujaku’s wide-eyed expression, his anxieties grew, causing him to avert his gaze from Koujaku again. 

It took some time, but when Koujaku finally got his mind working, he swallowed hard and said with slight trembles in his tone. 

“Take off your shirt, Noiz.” 

Noiz looked at him, surprised. “Is this really the time for it?” 

“Just take it off.” 

Koujaku’s impatient demand washed Noiz’s hesitation off and he did as he was told, throwing his clothes on the floor but before he could strip his pants off, Koujaku placed _his_ hand on the younger man’s slightly bulging stomach, halting his actions immediately. 

“I can’t feel anything.” He said after a few seconds. 

“I don’t feel it all the time. It comes and goes, but—“ 

 _\--it felt strange_ was what Noiz wanted to say before Koujaku pulled him into a firm hug again and buried his face into Noiz’s hair. 

“Old man?” 

“Oh God, Noiz. Oh my God.” 

Noiz was confused. First, the old man was acting all impatient and now he was crying into his hair. Was it something to do with his body? Was he going to die? 

“I can’t be exactly sure if this is what I think it is and I don’t know how it happened. We’ll go to the doctor and get it checked but,” Koujaku planted a firm kiss on his forehead. “..I’m pretty sure you’re going to be a father, Noiz. No, _we_ are going to be fathers.” 

_You’re going to be a father._

_….Father…._  

Koujaku wiped the tears off the corners of his eyes and pressed his ear against Noiz’s stomach, attempting to search for a sign of life. 

“Do you think it’s gonna be a girl or a boy?” Koujaku asked, excitement obvious in his tone. 

Noiz was still in a state of confusion and when it took too long for him to respond, Koujaku looked up and asked. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“….Am I abnormal?” 

He sounded so innocent, like a child who had committed a mistake and was trying to apologize to the parents. 

In response to him, Koujaku ruffled his hair again and pulled him in for a brief kiss. 

“No, you’re not normal.” Noiz stared, bewildered. “You’re never normal to me. You’re always special, Noiz. And with this child” – Koujaku placed his hand on Noiz’s stomach again – “you’re even special now.” 

“But I don’t know how to handle this. What if my condition got transferred to him? What if--“ 

Koujaku pressed a finger on the blonde’s lips, stopping his sentence instantly. 

“That’s why I’m here, right? I’ll go through this with you. He’s my child, too! But anyway,” Koujaku continued as he pressed his ear against Noiz’s stomach again. “What should we name him?” 

Noiz smiled. He’d never known what it’s like to be a father; he’d have no experience with parenthood; and he was not even sure if he was the right person to provide a life for his future child. But Koujaku was here, and he knew things would be okay, in fact, more than just okay. 

They would be having a family.

 

And he would be the father.

 

 


	7. Maybe; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe, just maybe. Noiz proposed an idea which had never crossed Aoba's mind but at the end of the day, he realized that he didn't need to think too hard about it, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was in my incubation mood again and this drabble is the result.
> 
> Inspired by [Sarah](http://archiveofourown.org/users/ceasefire/profile)'s gorgeous [mpreg fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/988163). If you haven't read it, go read. It's a wonderful, beautiful, gorgeous fic :")
> 
> I can never express enough on how grateful I am towards you for writing such a beautiful story. Seeing Noiz & Aoba having a family of their own is always an ultimate dream of mine and your story is just.. perfect. (I should stop before I go into a long speech again lmao). Can't wait for the last chapter bb! <3
> 
> Honestly, this drabble could be better. But I'm not too worried about it because I'm sure more drabbles would be up thanks to Sarah's and [Fio](http://archiveofourown.org/users/fio13)'s wonderful fics, which never fail to inspire me from time to time.
> 
> For now, please have some short pre-babies, domestic NoiAo moment uwu

There were a lot of things that they needed to learn. Neither of them had the experience of sharing a life with someone else. Aoba had his grandma to look after him for most of his life; whereas Noiz hadn't properly lived a “real” life to be completely eligible to take care of another person.

When the reality hit him after they’d settled down in Germany, Aoba was overwhelmed. He quickly assumed the responsibility to be in charge of their domestic life, even though his priority was to finally, properly, take care of Noiz. He started looking up various healthy recipes; he started making checklists after checklists for their household needs; and he also started to find out more – with his very limited knowledge of German – from his neighbors about the best place to get all the things he needed for their home. Because Noiz spent most of his time at work, he wanted to make sure that everything was in order and that he wouldn't need to worry about anything when he came home. He wanted him to feel comfortable. He wanted to give him a home. 

He thought that was the least he could do for him. 

Noiz wanted to help, but Aoba was against the idea. He didn't want his boyfriend to tire himself further especially when he was already exhausted from work. So he always ended up chasing the younger man out of the kitchen, or pushing him into the bathroom whenever Noiz showed any intention of wanting to help. Noiz wasn't pleased with his persistence; and he made sure that Aoba knew it through the small pout he’d give him every time Aoba mouthed the ‘no’. He wasn't angry; he just didn't want to feel useless. He wanted to own the responsibility together with Aoba, like a real family. 

Aoba got the message loud and clear. When his persistence didn't show any sign of cooling down, Aoba finally agreed to involve him in part of the responsibilities, which immediately earned him a happy smile, a small kiss, and a firm hug from the back.

 

 

The next weekend, the found themselves standing in front of the local supermarket. Telling Noiz that this was the best place to start learning, Aoba pushed the checklist into the younger man’s hand, directing him to the toiletry section while he ran off to grab some cooking materials from the food section. Noiz complied, although the small scowl between his eyebrows told Aoba that he disliked the idea of being separated from his boyfriend.

 

 

Noiz was taking too long. Tapping his feet impatiently, Aoba scanned around the place as he waited at their meet-up point. They’d promised to meet each other in half an hour time. It was already fifteen minutes overdue and Noiz was nowhere to be seen. Getting worried, Aoba strolled towards the toiletry section and after seeing no familiar sign of the nineteen-year-old, he searched the entire floor, and finally, found Noiz in the baby department. 

He had no idea how Noiz ended up here but that was the least of his concern when he saw the way Noiz stared at the row of baby onesies. He was about to call out to him but he found his voice stuck in his throat as Noiz picked up one of the onesies and – Aoba swore his heart just skipped a beat – smiled affectionately at it. Noiz’s smile was rare; his genuine, gentle smile was rarer. 

Time stopped. He couldn't tear his eyes away from how beautiful the scene in front of him was. It was as if Noiz was contemplating on which clothing to buy for his own child. It’d never occurred to him before but when the image struck him, Aoba realized that Noiz would make a perfect father. He would need to learn, _they_ would need to learn, but he would be perfect; he knew he would. His heart stung upon realizing that he would never be able to give Noiz something so precious. Ignoring the moistness in his eyes, Aoba walked towards Noiz and prodded him. 

“What are you doing here? I thought you’re lost or something.” 

Noiz smile widened upon seeing Aoba, and he raised the turquoise-colored onesie for Aoba to see. 

“Look, Aoba. This is cute.” 

Aoba gave the onesie a brief glance and nodded lightly as Noiz’s returned his attention to the other onesies after stuffing the one he was holding into Aoba’s hands. 

“Wait, you’re buying this?” 

“Yeah.” 

“What, why? None of us could fit into this.” 

Noiz halted. As if suddenly realized that Aoba was making a point, he grabbed another lime-colored onesie and put it into the basket alongside the turquoise-colored one before he grasped Aoba’s hand and led him out of the department. 

“Noiz?” Aoba called out warily. He felt awfully bad. 

“Hm?” 

“Are you… okay?” 

Noiz stopped and turned around. 

“Why wouldn't I be okay?” 

“No, I mean…” 

He didn't know how to put it into words. He wanted to apologize but at the same time, he wasn't sure if that was the right thing to do at the moment. 

“Do you….want a child?” Aoba asked with a voice so cautious it made Noiz curious. 

Noiz stared at the onesies in the basket, contemplating before he looked at Aoba again. 

“I have you. That’s more than enough.” 

“Then why are you buying these?” Aoba asked, pointing at the basket. 

Noiz took a while to answer. 

“…Just in case.” 

“Just in case? I can’t, Noiz. You know I can’t.” 

It wasn't hard for Noiz to miss the apology implication in his tone. 

“I like them. And you like them too, right? What I’m trying to say is that in case you want to adopt a child, at least we won’t regret not buying them. Besides,” Noiz smiled again. “we won’t know what’ll happen in the future.” 

“Nothing will happen!” Attempting to hide his fluster, Aoba smacked Noiz in the head. “You need to review how you spend your money, brat!” As he dragged Noiz to the counter, he wondered if he’ll ever catch up with Noiz’s way of thinking.

 

 

Later that night, Aoba caught Noiz browsing more baby items online. That was when he started to consider if he should take Noiz’s words into consideration and attempt to expand their small family. 

 

Maybe their dream would come true one day.

 

Maybe.

 


	8. Morning; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba's and Noiz's first night in Germany turned out to be something unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw the "Your OTP before they go to sleep" tweet by OTP Bot on twitter so I thought of writing some mindless fluff for Sunday night ww

Aoba and Noiz barely had time for each other on the first day they’d moved into their new home in Germany. After making sure that Aoba was comfortably settled down, Noiz had rushed out of the house and straight to his office for an emergency meeting. Aoba spent most of his time checking out the rooms in their apartment; he also unpacked his luggage as he started to add his own shadows into their new home. He was hanging up his clothes in the wardrobe when he heard someone at the door and he rushed down to see Noiz stepping into their living room and making his way to their bedroom after he'd thrown his briefcase on the couch. He looked exhausted.

Upon seeing Aoba, he wrapped Aoba into his arms and buried his head in the older man’s shoulder as Aoba gave him a gentle pat on the head and muttered a ‘You have worked hard’ in his ears before he pushed the tired man away and into the bathroom. 

They had a simple dinner after that and right after they were done, Noiz slipped under the blanket and beckoned Aoba to come over, which Aoba obeyed. The younger man gave Aoba a few pecks on the face and another deep, passionate kiss before he drifted to sleep with Aoba tightly wrapped in his arms and not long after, Aoba heard slow, stable breathing from behind him and he instantly knew that Noiz had fallen asleep. But he had a problem. He was still wide awake and he was still not used to the new environment, causing it difficult for him to sleep. 

He stared around - trying hard not to move an inch so as to avoid waking Noiz up - for another half an hour before he decided that it was a mission impossible as he slipped carefully out of Noiz’s embrace and quietly made his way out of the bedroom. There was nothing much he could do to occupy his time so he flipped through the newspaper he’d found on the coffee table, gave up after acknowledging the fact that he couldn’t understand a single word in there, and strode towards the kitchen, where he found a carton of milk inside the fridge and a grin spread across his face. 

He hated milk, but he also knew that it was one of those useful remedies to help one with their sleep; and at that moment of time, he couldn’t care about anything else besides the fact that he _need_ to sleep. He needed his energy to keep him going for the next day. He was about to take one of the milk bottles out when he heard footsteps behind him and – chills running down his body – he stood up in lightning speed and turned around to see Noiz staring blearily at him. 

“What are you doing here?” the younger man asked, the sleepiness obvious in his tone. 

“I can’t sleep.” Aoba replied casually. “Why are you awake?” 

“I can’t find you when I woke up so I got worried.” Noiz replied after he gave out a yawn. 

Finding a sleepy Noiz endearing, Aoba smiled and closed the fridge door behind him as he walked towards the nineteen-year-old and dragged him out of the kitchen and into the living room where he settled him down on a couch and proceeded to sit beside him. 

“You’re not going to bed?” Noiz asked, leaning his head against Aoba’s shoulder. 

“Later. After I finish with this milk.” 

“Nn..” 

Noiz seemed like he wanted to say something but his sleepiness overtook his will and he drifted back to sleep almost instantly, head still on Aoba’s shoulder. 

Aoba peeked sideway at the sleeping Noiz and gave out a small smile. Even after he was done with his milk, he didn’t have the heart to wake Noiz up so instead, he stretched his hand to grab the nearest cushion he could reach and placed it against Noiz’s stomach to keep him warm as Noiz fidgeted slightly without waking up. 

The next day, Aoba woke up to the bright sunlight penetrating through the window and he opened his eyes to find himself cuddling in Noiz’s arms. He was about to sit up when Noiz pulled him closer and he looked up to see the brat smirking mischievously at him. 

“Good morning,” he whispered as he leaned down to give Aoba a peck on the lips.

 

It seemed that both of them had spent their first night sleeping in the living room, which was definitely not one of the ways Aoba had expected to spend on his first day in Germany. But nonetheless, he woke up in Noiz’s embrace and he wouldn’t think of anything else better to wake up to.

 

 


	9. Warmth; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noiz couldn't sleep and Koujaku suffered the consequences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's hard when you have two OTPs because you love them too much to not write about them lmao
> 
> Also from the "Your OTP before they go to sleep" prompt by OTP Bot on Twitter ww

When Koujaku switched the lights off, Noiz was already burying himself under the blankets. They’d had a small argument earlier when Koujaku found Noiz messing around with his neatly arranged pots of flowers outside his house when he’d came back slightly later than usual for the day. The brat had pouted at him and had followed him into his house like it was the most natural thing to do. If that was not enough to irk the older man further, Noiz had demanded for food and Koujaku had to sacrifice his share to feed him. Now he was just exhausted and he wanted nothing but sleep.

Clicking his tongue, Koujaku strolled towards his bed and buried himself under the blankets as well, yawning loudly before he cleared his mind and allowed himself to drift into sleep. But his wish was crumbled into dust when Noiz nudged him and he felt the younger man’s weight on his arm, disturbing his sleep.

“Old man, it’s too warm in here.”

He knew the brat was _a brat_ and sometimes he could endure his immaturity but today was not the day and his endurance limit was dangerously close to snapping especially when he was so desperately in need of sleep.

“Get rid of the blanket, take off your clothes, sleep outside, do whatever you want. Just keep quiet and let me sleep,” he replied impatiently.

Noiz didn’t disturb him further and Koujaku soon heard the sound of fabric ruffling and he knew that the brat was doing whatever he’d just suggested besides the last option. Finally left in peace, he sank further into his pillow and was about to drift into sleep when he felt Noiz’s weight on him again.

“Old man, it’s still too warm.”

At this point of time, he no longer had the patience to deal with the brat as he glared furiously at him and turned his back towards him without another word, indicating that he no longer had the interest to entertain Noiz further.

 

He was almost falling asleep when he heard the sound of someone typing on the keyboard and he turned around to see Noiz leaning against the bed wall, his eyes glued to the hologram screens he’d summoned in front of him.

“Why are you not sleeping?” he asked with a slight hint of irritation in his voice.

“I told you. It’s too warm in here, and I can’t sleep.”

Koujaku clicked his tongue again. “Keep quiet, you’re disturbing my sleep. Do something else that won’t produce any sound.”

“I can’t. This is the only thing I can do now.”

Grunting loudly, Koujaku sat up and leaned against the bed wall as he forcefully swept whatever that Noiz was working on off his hands and pushed him to lie down.

“What?” Noiz asked.

“I’m gonna fan you to sleep,” the older man said as he grabbed a fan from the bedside table and started fanning the brat.

“Why?”

“Aren’t you feeling warm?”

“Yeah, I am.”

“Then just shut up and go to sleep. I can’t sleep if you’re awake,” Koujaku complained and gave out a loud yawn as he supported his head with his palm and closed his eyes, still fanning the brat.

Noiz gave out a small smirk as he inched closer and wrapped his arms around the old man’s torso.

He didn’t know when he’d fallen asleep but he knew that he was still sweating when he fell asleep and the old man had stopped fanning him halfway and had fallen asleep sooner than he did. The old man’s terrible temper when he woke up was a solid proof for that.

 

 


	10. Writing Prompts Collection #1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 1\. **"You're teasing me"** [Koujaku x Noiz]  
>  for Tumblr user [policeghost](www.policeghost.tumblr.com).
> 
> 2\. **"You're too good at this"** [Mink x Aoba]  
>  for Tumblr user [zippura](http://zippura.tumblr.com/).
> 
> 3\. **"Kitchen counter or shower?"** [Mink  & Noiz]  
> for Tumblr user [teamseaslug](http://teamseaslug.tumblr.com/).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any prompts you'd like me to attempt, feel free to check out this [meme](http://shino-cchi.tumblr.com/post/85728333374/nsfw-meme-kinda-send-me-a-pairing-and-one-of-the/).

**You're teasing me.**

 

“You’re teasing me.”

Noiz shot an unsatisfying glare at the older man beside him, who was still having difficulty speaking as he clutched his stomach, trying very hard to stop laughing.

“Can you stop?” Noiz complained, a scowl now visibly making its way in between his eyebrows.

“I-I’m sorry! I can’t—” Koujaku panted, still trying to catch his breath from all the laughing.  

It was supposed to be a lighthearted, stress-free vacation where both Koujaku and Noiz had decided to take their time off their daily routines, ultimately landing themselves in London. At first, things were pretty casual and relaxed between them – they’d tried out the local western delicacies, in which Koujaku ended up switching his steak with a new dish of fish; they had also landed themselves in a local tailor shop, where Noiz insisted to tailor-make a whole new set of suit jacket for Koujaku, successfully flustering the older man as he hastily brushed a mischievous-looking Noiz off the moment they stepped out of the shop.

Things were pretty much under Noiz’s control (he’d initiated the idea for this getaway) until they passed by this one particular shop that immediately took the authority off Noiz’s hands.

“I should’ve figured it out, but still—“ Koujaku’s trailed off, unable to contain his laughter again as he pressed his hand against his mouth, trying hard to hide his overreactions from Noiz.

“Can you just..” Noiz started, almost storming out of the shop when Koujaku gripped him by the wrist and stopping him from leaving.

“Okay, I’ll stop. I’m sorry,” he said, finally managed to stop laughing after taking a few deep breaths.

“By the way, I’m not teasing you,” Koujaku continued, dragging Noiz deeper into the shop at the same time and stopping at a specific counter where Noiz was so attracted to just a few minutes ago.

“Don’t lie, old man. You clearly find it funny and that was why you were laughing so hard,” Noiz gave out a pout, unwilling to look at the older man just to demonstrate his irritation.

“No, that’s not it,” Koujaku clarified hastily.

“Then what it is?” Noiz asked, now shooting him a sideway glare.

“I just find it… cute,” the hairdresser confessed. And upon seeing the faint tint of pink that had made its way across Noiz’s face, a result of his honesty, Koujaku reached out to ruffle the brat’s hair before he continued. “You should’ve told me earlier so that we could adopt one.”

Noiz’s eyes brightened up in response to the statement. Turning around, he stared expectantly into Koujaku’s eyes, as if he couldn’t believe what he’d just heard.

“You mean.. we can adopt one?” he asked cautiously, his voice dropped to a small whisper.

“Of course, I don’t mind a new companion, not when he’s so lovable,” Koujaku replied happily. Then, he dragged Noiz to one of the cages and pointed at one of the fluffy bundle of furs. “What do you think about him?”

Before Noiz could answer, though, Koujaku continued.

“I think he’s cute, like you.”

Noiz could no longer remember what happened next. For all he knew, they were walking out of the shop a few minutes later – Koujaku with a cage in one hand and a packet of rabbit food in another.

He never knew he still possessed the ability to feel so contented and… happy, but he knew that this was something he could definitely get use to.

And, smirking playfully, he secretly hoped that Koujaku would get use to his way of saying thank you when they got back later that night – or rather, his  _way of teasing_.

 

***

 

“Hmm,” Noiz hummed, still keeping his distance away from Koujaku.

The moment they’d finally settled down their shopping bags and the rabbit who was now part of their family, Noiz had attacked Koujaku from the back by pushing him aggressively towards the bed, causing the latter to fall awkwardly on the king-sized mattress. He didn’t even have the time to recover from the shock as Noiz immediately advanced towards him and released the tie from his neck as he proceeded to seal his wrists to the bed post.

Koujaku was still having difficulties predicting Noiz’s actions, and moments like these shouldn’t come as a shock. But what actually astonished him was the lack of actions from the younger one right after he’d locked his movements on the bed. He was expecting an aggressive (probably slightly abusive) treatment of some sort; but it didn’t come, and he was starting to find himself feeling increasingly unsettling.

 “What exactly do you want?” Koujaku gritted the words out through his teeth, feeling the friction against his wrist when he struggled to break himself free.

“What do you think I want?” Noiz smirked, purposely advancing slightly forward, just enough for Koujaku to make out his feature under the dim bedroom light.

“.. you little shit.”

 _I know exactly what you want_ , he thought, without voicing them out.

Noiz then proceeded to take his time getting rid of his own clothes. Starting from the tie, he gave it a slight pull, loosening it and ultimately ripping it off as he threw it near Koujaku’s leg. Then, he started to – slowly – unbutton his shirt, sensually trailing his finger against the fair skin now partially exposed for Koujaku to see.

Koujaku swallowed thickly as he fixed his eyes on Noiz’s every action, his eyes visibly darkened with lust when Noiz tossed his shirt to one side.

Feeling increasingly frustrated (the restraints definitely not helping), Koujaku could only take slow, measured breaths to contain his overwhelmed desire. But his effort was proven useless when he witnessed Noiz crawling towards him like a hungry wolf waiting for its chance to jump at its prey.

Upon feeling Noiz’s hot breaths on his face, he could literally feel the way heat spread across his body and ultimately landed on his cock. Noiz obviously noticed it, judging on the way he traced his finger in a ghostlike way along Koujaku’s jawline and along his neck, only stopping when he placed his palm against Koujaku’s chest, feeling the older man’s heartbeat pumping furiously against his hand.

“..goddammit, brat.”

“Hmm?” Noiz hummed against Koujaku’s ear, his warm breath tickling his earlobe as he proceeded to give it a swift flick of the tongue.

“Can you just…” Koujaku stuttered, trying hard to contain his pants at the same time.

“What is it?” Noiz’s voice dropped to a heated whisper, the feverishness in his tone sending small trembles down Koujaku’s spine.

“…this is how you thank me for buying you something you like?” Koujaku retorted.

Noiz straightened up then. Straddling on Koujaku’s thighs, he wrapped his arms around the older man’s neck and brought their face closer.

“Thank you,” he muttered as he planted a soft kiss on Koujaku’s lips. “But there’s something else I like better.”

Without giving time for Koujaku to figure the answer out, Noiz started trailing his tongue piercing along his face and paused when he reached his ear.

“You.”

The brat is gonna be the death of him and it’s too late to pull himself out of the situation now.

He still needed time to properly figure out Noiz’s thought process, but for all he knew, he definitely loved the way the brat was teasing him now.

It was going to be a long, pleasurable night.

 

 

* * *

 

**You're too good at this.**

 

“You’re too good at this.”

Aoba nearly dropped his glass as he looked at Mink, his mouth hanging open with a dopey look on his face. They were in their comfortable silence after dinner. Aoba had made Mink a cup of what he assumed to be his favorite coffee as he sat on the couch, tampering on Ren’s fur and stealing quick, quiet glances at Mink momentarily.

They’d usually spend their after dinner time indulging in their comfortable silence until Mink pestered Aoba to bed when it got too late. Aoba wasn’t too bothered by the unvocal nature of Mink. After they’d spent a good one year together, he’d started to get a hang of Mink’s nonverbal communication style to understand that he was no longer causing him trouble as how he thought he did. Thus, when Mink broke the silence abruptly, Aoba could merely stare at him, unsure of how to respond.

“I-I’m sorry?” he asked with a small voice, realizing that it’d become even more awkward if he was to ignore the sudden disturbance.

“I said, you’re getting too good at this,” Mink replied in a seemingly nonchalant tone, his eyes still fixed at the book on his lap, without a glance at Aoba, as he took another sip of his coffee.

“…good at..?” Aoba asked curiously. He was pretty sure he didn’t do anything too absurd to earn such compliment.

Mink took a few moments before he gave out a light sigh. Then, he raised his mug up for Aoba to see.

“This,” he said.

“….oh.”

Realizing that he was starting to look stupid, Aoba hastily brought his own cup to his mouth and sipped noisily on his water.

He’d been trying to learn more about Mink ever since he’d moved into his household. Mink was obviously a tricky man. But it wasn’t hard for Aoba to notice how frequent he’d make coffee for himself, and also how much coffee bean he’d stocked in their kitchen cabinet.

It wasn’t hard for Aoba to realize that – be it a favorite or a habitual routine – Mink was definitely attracted to, or at least prefer to, drink coffee on a daily basis.

“So this was what you were doing when I was away? Practicing how to make good coffee?” Mink asked, his gaze now fixed on Aoba and effectively painting a faint blush on the latter’s cheeks.

Aoba’s wary nod confirmed his suspicions.

The indistinct smell of coffee he’d always come across whenever the younger male was anywhere near him wasn’t an illusion, after all.

************ 

Aoba’s initiative to make something Mink liked had indeed paid off well; but it came with a heavy price. Ever since he’d started learning how to brew good coffee for Mink, he had been facing difficulties with sleep that kept him awake at odd hours of the night, having consumed too much caffeine during the day.

As he tossed around in bed trying to force himself to sleep, the sudden hot breath he felt on the nape of his neck sent trembles all over his body as he looked over his shoulder to realize that Mink had hugged him from behind, his huge hands wrapping around Aoba’s waist and pulling him closer.

Feeling his heartbeat increasing in an abnormally fast pace, Aoba swallowed thickly and took a few deep breaths, attempting to calm himself down. He’d heard about the way caffeine may potentially increase one’s heart rate, but at this moment of time, he wasn’t sure if the rapid heartbeat against his chest was due to caffeine or…

…something else entirely.

But the moment he felt his back pressing against Mink’s bare chest, he was almost sure that the “something else entirely” was the reason for his heightened tension. After a few miserable, failed attempts to break himself free from Mink’s strong grip, he gave up and instead, lay slumped against the bigger man’s body.

He intended to clear his mind and force himself to sleep but the heat that had started flaring in his belly became a distraction so strong that he had lost count on exactly how many times he’d held his breath to stop the gasps that were threatening to spill out of his mouth.

It was almost impossible for him to get his mind off his need now; not when he was also physically… frustrated.

Slowly, he reached out for his erection and gave it a few slow strokes, biting on his lower lips to stop himself from moaning out loud. He could feel the increased desire in him, but the position he was in now made it too difficult for him to conduct more desperate movements and he swallowed, again and again, breathing open-mouthed to contain the uncontrollable need.

Halfway through his carefully measured pumps, Aoba closed his eyes, the lack of sight further heightening his sense of touch as he felt himself almost reaching the peak. All he needed was another fast stroke and…

“I see you’re getting good at this too.”

The deep voice he heard right beside his ear, alongside the hot breath that was tickling his ear shell froze his movements. Feeling cold sweat pooling down his back, he looked over his shoulder to see Mink smirking suggestively at him, the corner of his lips twitching upwards.

“I..”

Before he could properly explain himself, though, he felt Mink’s hand on top of his – the one on his length – and he allowed his hand to be brushed away, the firm grasp on his cock effectively drawing a choked moan out of him.

“Let me help.”

That was the last thing he heard before he drown in his own pleasure.

Perhaps consuming too much coffee wasn’t all that bad, after all.

 

 

* * *

**Kitchen counter or shower?**

 

“Kitchen counter or shower?”

Noiz shrugged at the question as he shot a sideway glare at the uninvited visitor now staring unemotionally at him.

He was lurking around dark alleys he had yet to explore when he was ambushed by a group of Ribsters. He knew he’d made countless enemies along the way, especially when both Rhyme and Rib players weren’t particularly fond with each other from the beginning. An ambush was something he should’ve expected, but an escape route never once crossed his mind.

He couldn’t feel pain, anyway. It didn’t matter to him.

He never expected help, either externally or internally. But as more commotions hit his ears, he lifted his head up, blinking the red out of his eyes and trying to refocus his vision so that he could make out the muscular figure now standing right in front of him.

Before he knew it, he was being dragged into his own apartment. After he was being unceremoniously thrown into the room, he merely sat, confused and unsure of the situation he was in.

“Kitchen counter or shower?” the gravelly voice echoed in his empty room.

He looked over his shoulder to see Mink standing at the doorway with an emotionless expression plastered on his face. He smirked, turning around and finally facing him.

“What do you want?” he asked, without caring if he’d unintentionally piss the man off.

He knew nothing about Mink; he wasn’t interested with him, anyway. The fact that they were even speaking to each other now surprised him.

But Mink obviously knew about him. He knew where he stayed, and he’d jumped into the scene and had potentially saved his life when he himself couldn’t care less.

“Didn’t anyone teach you how to value your life?” Mink said, his voice as deep as how Noiz remembered it to be.

Snorting, Noiz stood up, almost losing balance as he stumbled and grabbed onto Mink’s arm, saving him from crashing back to the floor. Who was he to teach him about life, anyway? When he himself had spent almost half of his life without properly living?

Realizing that Noiz didn’t have any intention to answer him, Mink grasped the nineteen-year-old’s arm and swung it over his shoulder as he glanced around the room.

“Over there,” Noiz finally responded as he pointed towards a corner of the room.

“So you choose the shower.”

Noiz merely smirked.

 **********

The moment Noiz was undressed, he scrambled clumsily into the bathtub as Mink turned the water on. Pink tinge from the dried blood on Noiz’s skin started spreading in the water as Mink clicked his tongue upon seeing the sight, hastily grabbing the sponge from the sink and started rubbing on Noiz’s skin.

Noiz could only grunt at the situation he’d landed himself in. Him, sharing the same personal space with Mink, who was now brushing the blood off his skin. Who would’ve seen this day coming? His snorts drew Mink’s attention as he frowned and – still giving off the unwelcome aura – glared at Noiz.

“Do you even know what you’re doing?” Noiz muttered, rubbing his head as several flakes of dried blood fell from his hair and into the water. “Cut it off, I’m not Aoba. I have no use for you.”

He was expecting a punch or a hit of some sort. But Mink merely sighed, pouring water onto the younger one’s body and, after making sure that he was completely clean, moved his gaze back at him again.

“You’re starting to smell of death. Get a grip of yourself,” he simply muttered before he walked out of the bathroom.

Noiz couldn’t understand what he meant then. He didn’t even know how death smelt like. But when Mink showed him that brief concern, he was sure he smelt a faint hint of life.

 


	11. Kisu no Hi Prompt Requests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **"Welcome Home"** [Koujaku x Noiz]  
>  He never know the meaning for the word 'home', until...  
> \-- for [princelingmeow](http://princelingmeow.tumblr.com/)
> 
> **"The Meaning of A Kiss** [Koujaku x Noiz x Aoba]  
>  Sometimes Koujaku suspects if Noiz even knows what a kiss means.  
> \-- for [Chelsea](http://thecataractattack.tumblr.com/)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I accepted prompt requests for Kisu no Hi <3  
> These two drabbles are the result of it ww

**Welcome Home**

 

_Home_.

It was a term he wasn’t very familiar with. Whenever someone mentioned the word, all he could feel was an indistinct feeling of detachment. He used to stay in a humongous  _house_ , which he couldn’t really call it a  _home_. Because the word  _home_  was supposed to make him feel all warm and happy inside – it was supposed to be a place he belonged to.

 

But he felt none of those from the  _house_  he used to reside in.

Eventually, the word disappeared from his head. And eventually, it lost its meaning.

He’d forgotten all about how a real  _home_  felt like.

“Welcome home.”

He froze at the greeting. Leaving his shoe dangling halfway off his feet, he looked up, seeing the more-than-familiar shadow of red right in front of him.

Koujaku was leaning against the door, a cigarette hanging loosely between his lips and giving him a tasteful grin. It had been a month since he’d moved into the hairdresser’s house and so far, his lifestyle had been pretty much the same. He still had irregular sleeping patterns. Whenever he woke up, it was always almost noon and he was even lucky to catch a quick late breakfast with Koujaku before the latter strode off to work. It was pretty much the same. His day began in the late afternoon, and he always left the  _house_  at night.

They pretty much shared a completely different lifestyle.

He’d told Koujaku that there wasn’t a need for him to adapt to  _his_  lifestyle because that was what they’d compromised with each other when he decided to move in. Koujaku merely gave him a nod and refused to dwell on the topic any further.

But the old man’s stubbornness could be really disturbing. Because no matter how late it was, he would  _always_ find him waiting for him – be it in a conscious or half-conscious state.

“Rough night?” Koujaku asked, blowing smoke out of his mouth.

Noiz smiled.

He’d never know how it felt to have a  _home_  to return to. He’d never know how it felt to have someone waiting for him to return.

And he’d never know how it felt to actually have a place where he could call it a  _home_.

But now…

When they came face to face with each other, Koujaku hastily discarded his cigarette and placed a kiss on Noiz’s forehead, on his cheek, then finally, on his lips.

“You’ve worked hard. Welcome home, Noiz.”

Returning the tender kisses Koujaku had given him, Noiz muttered.

“ _I’m home_.”

 

He knew.

 

 

* * *

**The Meaning of A Kiss**

 

Sometimes Koujaku suspects if Noiz even knows how kisses work.

 

The first time he’d seen him kissing Aoba, he stormed towards them and pulled them apart before Noiz could stick his tongue into Aoba’s mouth.

The next time the brat tried to do it again, Aoba stopped Koujaku, telling him that there was no need to get all worked up over something like this after he’d complained that Koujaku was treating him like a child again.

But no matter what Aoba said, there is this unsettling pool of frustration in Koujaku that he couldn’t ignore. So one day, when all three of them are sharing the same personal space in Aoba’s room, he decides to bring the issue up.

“Brat, what does a kiss mean to you?”

Noiz raises a curious eyebrow at Koujaku as he stops dancing his fingers on the keyboard. Asking him a sensual question is probably not a good idea, Koujaku figures. The brat probably never thinks too much about it when he conducts those actions anyway.

But instead of brushing him off, Koujaku witnesses as the youngest male’s eyebrows knit together, seemingly thinking about his question.

“It’s a common greeting in my country,” he answers.

“But you don’t kiss someone on the lips as a ‘common greeting’, I suppose?” Koujaku urges, unsatisfied with how Noiz brushes him off so easily.

“Koujaku, what’s got into you?” Unable to ignore the awkwardness in the room, Aoba voices out as he moves closer to both of them after putting Ren in sleep mode.

The way Aoba asked him made him feel like he’s  _indeed_  taking things too seriously, and that he shouldn’t be dwelling with things like these when the person who is involved isn’t too concerned about it.

Who is he to stop Noiz from doing what he wants, anyway?

Seeing the way Koujaku fidgets in his seat, Noiz smirks and pulls Aoba closer, immediately earning a small squeal from the latter.

“It’s indeed a common greeting, old man. But when it comes to Aoba, it’s a totally different meaning altogether.”

Without waiting Koujaku to roll the ‘what’ out, Noiz plants a soft kiss on Aoba’s cheek, effectively painting a deep flush of red on his cheek, and proceeds to trail small kisses all over his face.

As if attempting to act like he’s seen nothing, Koujaku turns away, lacking even the strength to pull Noiz off. But before he could properly calm his messed up mind, he feels a pair of hands hugging him from the back, then Aoba is moving in front of him and sitting in between his legs. The sudden intimacy pushes him into a state of confusion as he stares, unsure of how to respond.

“Correction, when it comes to  _both of you_ , it’s a totally different meaning altogether.”

The husky voice he hears from right beside his ear sends chills all over his body and he hitches his breath in respond, desperately trying to break himself free before he could lose his composure but he’s two seconds too late when Aoba starts planting soft kisses on his face and Noiz starts sucking on his neck.

“ _It means ‘I’m marking you as mine’_.”

 

That’s the last thing he heard and the rest of the night is history. 

 


	12. Reunion; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba went back to Midorijima for a visit but his heart was elsewhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : "Someone's happy to see me"

“ _You can go back anytime you want._ ”

When Noiz told Aoba that, Aoba knew that he actually meant it. Noiz had been giving him so much freedom to the extent that sometimes he actually felt as if he was taking advantage of him. 

The first few months when they started their new life in Germany, Aoba was insecure. It was just normal human reaction. He had never set his foot out of his comfort zone and to be lured into such a huge change in such a sudden pace required more time for him to adapt to it. But he had been doing well, something he was amazed of himself. 

 

He knew it was normal for him to feel insecure, anxious, nervous. And he also knew that it was perfectly normal for him to experience homesick, being situated in a foreign place and constantly overwhelmed by unfamiliar atmosphere, language and people.

That was why Noiz told him that he could return to Midorjima anytime he wanted. In fact, if Aoba was to even bring up the suggestion to leave Germany and settle back in his hometown, he was sure that Noiz would agree in a heartbeat.

But there was no way he would do that. He’d promised Noiz to take care of him, regardless of the location, and he would definitely live up to that.

"How long will you be staying there this time?" 

"Hmm, maybe a week?"

"Okay."

Sure, he took Noiz’s offer and returned to Midoirjima every three months. But he was still a bunch of contradictions. The night before, he would happily stuff all his belongings into his luggage, asking Noiz once a while about things he should bring with him. But when it came to the day of the departure, the excitement within him was suddenly nowhere to be seen, replaced instead by a heavy weight that pronounced miserable. 

"What’s with your face?" 

"Hmm?"

Every time this happened, Noiz would prod him, giving him a smile and ruffling him on his hair. He would comfort him, telling him that he wouldn’t escape, and that he would always be waiting for him. 

It’d be better if Noiz didn't say any of those though, because then, he wouldn't end up sobbing into his young boyfriend’s chest, his composure he was maintaining so hard crumbling in mere seconds.

It was ironic. He wanted so much to see his grandma and his friends. But now, he wanted to stay here, at home, with his boyfriend.

***

"I see you have been adapting well in Germany, Aoba!"

Upon knowing that Aoba had returned to Midorijima, Koujaku had dropped by his house for dinner, intending to catch up with his childhood friend. Until today, Aoba still felt guilty for not explaining things properly to him when he decided to leave Midorijima with Noiz. But now that everything was pretty much settled down -Koujaku being understanding as usual but the twitch in his eyebrow when Aoba told him about how he ended up with Noiz was too obvious for Aoba to miss- Koujaku started to accept the fact that Aoba was happy, and that was the only thing that should matter to him.

"Yeah. Things are pretty good there," Aoba replied, taking in a spoonful of his dinner.

It had been three days since he returned to his hometown, not one day had passed when he wasn't missing his brat thousand miles away from him. Sure, they’d talked through their video calls without fail every night, but nothing would ever beat the feeling to be able to  _feel_  the brat with his own skin. 

It was only three days, and yet, he wanted to be home already.

***

On his fifth day in Midorijima, Aoba stayed in the house, intending to help out with some cleaning when Tae stopped him, telling him that it was already clean enough even without his help. Smiling bitterly, he retreated into his room, sitting on his bed when his gaze shifted unconsciously to the photo frame by his bedside table.

It was a picture of him and Noiz - the day when they had their first date in Germany.

He felt a pang of warmth in his chest as he caressed the frame. He missed Noiz. He missed the way Noiz would smile at him whenever he got home from work. He missed the way Noiz would touch him whenever he was down. He missed the way a small pout would appear on his boyfriend’s face when Aoba teased him. 

He missed his voice.

"So that’s what you do every day?"

When the said voice rang in his ear suddenly, he jumped, turning around to see Noiz leaning against the doorway with a playful smirk on his face.

"N-Noiz!"

"Someone’s happy to see me," Noiz said, pacing into the room and settling himself down beside Aoba. He was in his casual clothing, his hair in a slight mess, and his eyes were slightly red, obviously sleep deprived.

"What are you doing here?" Aoba asked, the happiness evident in his voice.

"I read your mind," Noiz joked, taking Aoba’s hand into his and caressing the back of it. 

But the mischievous smirk was soon replaced by a tender smile as he continued.

"Truth is, I miss you," he confessed, inching closer to kiss Aoba on the forehead. "I miss you so much."

It was a bit too much for Aoba to stomach, now that Noiz had gone all the way to see him here. He should be very angry at the way he spent his money in such a reckless way like this. He should give him another round of lecture.

But those can wait. What he couldn't wait now was to embrace his brat as he wrapped him into a firm hug.

"I miss you, too, Noiz."

Then, it hit him.

It didn't matter where they were. Because his home was wherever Noiz would be.

 


	13. Quiet; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba decided to take a revenge on Noiz at work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : "You look super hot from down here"
> 
> Also, please check out [this awesome comic strip](http://polyvinylmonster.tumblr.com/post/92941562875/update-the-fanfic-by-shino-cchi-is-now) by [polyvinylmonster](http://polyvinylmonster.tumblr.com/) accompanying this piece <3

Our relationship was filled with challenges – from the day we met, to the day we got together – the ‘ _is this a challenge_ ’ quote had become part of our lifestyles. It was a unique trait for our relationship, and it’d probably remain as so for a very long time.

Before he knew it, he was pinned against the wall, in a  _cubicle_  of a washroom. Desperately trying to stifle the moans that were threatening to spill out of his mouth, he glared at the younger man, who had now proceeded to pull his tie free, almost strangling him when the desperation became a bit too pronounced in his action. 

“Oi, Noiz…” Aoba reprimanded weakly. But his hand flew back to his mouth straight after he’d called out the other man’s name, feeling the warmth of his boyfriend’s hand against his chest.

“Keep your voice down if you don’t want anyone to hear you,” Noiz said in a heated whisper, the corner of his lips curving slightly, visibly amused.

It often happened so fast Aoba didn't have the time to properly accommodate himself into the situation before he found a hungry wolf hovering over him, the pair of lime green orbs so visibly filled with want that left him in a state of confused daze. And before he knew it, he was savored, only coming back to himself when the said wolf was already halfway down his meal. It was too late for anything else then, let alone a retort.

But this time, he came back faster than usual.

“Noiz,” he called out again with a firmer voice, feeling the movements on his skin stopped, accompanied by a curious stare from his boyfriend.

“Let’s change place,” Aoba said, gently pushing the other away and attempting to tidy up the mess Noiz had caused on his clothes. “It’s too cramped here.”

Despite being hold back, Noiz smiled – a smile that told Aoba that his expectation towards what was going to happen had just skyrocketed – as he nodded, helping Aoba with his tie and leading them out of the washroom.

 ***

“What’s in your mind?” Noiz asked the moment they closed the door behind them. They had now safely retreated into Noiz’s humongous office when the younger man trapped in against the door, his hands on each side of his head.

Casually pushing Noiz away, Aoba grasped on his wrist instead, leading him to his chair and pressed him down against it.

“Stay put,” he said. Noiz was still trying to figure out what Aoba was trying to do but soon, he realized that there wasn't a need to ponder any further after all.

“I thought we tried this before already?” he teased, staring feverishly at the way Aoba slid down his body and situated himself comfortably in between his legs.

Aoba merely gave him a teasing smirk, a replication of what he’d always give Aoba whenever he was trying to rile him up. If that was what Aoba intended to mirror, he was definitely succeeding.

“’ _Keep your voice down_ ’, huh?” Aoba mumbled as he started tracing playful circles against Noiz’s inner thighs. Noiz knew Aoba was posing him a challenge – a  _revenge_  – but he simply went with the flow. He knew there would come a day when Aoba would climb over his head and give him the same treatment he’d given him all this while. He thought it was amusing, and the way he’d emphasized on how ‘he wants to try everything and anything with Aoba’ wasn't going to save him from what was going to come soon.

Eyes remained focused on every one of Aoba’s action, Noiz reached out and threaded his fingers through the other’s hair. Taking it as if it was an encouragement for more arousal, Aoba gave out a small smile before he trailed his hands up the front of Noiz’s thighs, the slight quiver of his muscles obvious even though their skins were separated with the thick material of his pants.

Noiz knew that Aoba could be a tease if he really wanted to – and today, now, seemed like a time when his boyfriend intended to step up his game. Leaning against the back of his chair, he stared down at Aoba, a quiet smirk escaping his lips.

“You know,” he started inaudibly but his voice was thick of want that Aoba couldn't help but feel chills traveling down his spine. “Seeing you like this has been one of my fantasies.”

“Hmm, so you do fantasize about things like these, huh?” Aoba returned Noiz’s stare with a perfect imitation of the brat’s smirk.

“When it comes to you,” Noiz continued, gently stroking on Aoba’s cheeks as he bit back a moan when Aoba unbuckled his belt and slid his palms lightly over his inner thighs, now totally undisturbed by any materials. “my fantasies are limitless.”

Aoba gave him an expression which Noiz suspected was a pout but he couldn't make out what exactly it was before Aoba pulled his half-hard dick out and inched closer to it. It often amazed how easily aroused Noiz could be, then he was reminded on how he’d missed out the complete set for the most of his life, and how he could actually make use of that.

Smiling tenderly at the thought, he decided to ignore whatever the younger one had to say as he traced ghostlike kisses down the length before he extended the kisses to his thighs; but this time, the kisses weren't featherlike anymore; instead, it was sucky and rough, immediately causing Noiz to drop his head back against the couch, his chest heaving and his breath came out rough.

Satisfied with the response, Aoba dragged his lips back to his length again, swirling his tongue around the head of it and tasting the bitterness on his tongue before he descended his mouth on him, flicking his eyes up to take a look at his flustered boyfriend before he took the shaft all the way in until he felt the head hitting the back of his throat.

In between the rough sucks, he slid his hands down to Noiz’s balls, scratching on them a little, and feeling Noiz shivered and jumped slightly when he sank his nails in a bit too hard as if he’s been electrified.

“You’re getting really good at this.” He heard Noiz huffed between pants, effectively drawing a grin on his face as he tugged on Noiz’s dick piercings, an act of approval.

Pulling his length out, he stared up at Noiz again and asked.

“More?”

Noiz gave him a mischievous smirk as he snaked his hand behind Aoba’s neck, giving him a gentle rub which told Aoba that he’d taken up his suggestion.

“If you could—“

Then, he froze as knocks echoed from the door. Immediately pulling his hand away from Aoba, he was about to help his boyfriend up when Aoba took his entire length in again, keeping him stimulated.

“W-wait—“

“Sir?”

“Shit! Wai—“

“Can I come in?”

“Y-yes, it’s okay. Come in.”

He took in a deep breath as he heard the door open. Clenching his hands into fists, he stared as a man came in with a pile of document in his hands.

“Good day, sir. Regarding the file you asked…” the man started but as soon as Noiz’s face came into clearer view, he trailed off.

“Urm…”

“W-what?”

Noiz’s face was beyond incomprehensible at the moment. He felt cold sweat running down his back, mingling with the sweat that was there for a completely different reason. Truth be told, he wasn't opposed to the idea of someone finding out that he had been conducting intimate moments with his boyfriend in his office (by now everyone should know what was the deal between both of them) but he’d rather not getting caught red-handed like this when he was vulnerably unprepared.

_Keep your voice down, huh?_

Cursing internally at the man below him, Noiz shot him a glare before he returned his attention to the man before him.

“Sir, are you okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“Pardon me, but your face is burning up. Are you feeling ill?”

It was too late for him to calm the heat on his face, and it was too late for him to even calm the burning passion within him. But it wasn't too late for him to come up with an excuse.

“Heh, what are you talking about. I’m perfectly fi—“

It caught him off guard – the tip of the tongue that had made its way over his slit caused him to bite down his lip and swallowed his remaining words back down his throat.

The moan that he hadn't managed to suppress drew a shock out of the man in front of him.

“Sir! What happened? Should I call an ambulance? Do you—“

“N-no. It’s okay. On second thought, I don’t really feel good but I can manage—mph!” _The goddamn bite._

“But…”

Forcefully swallowing his moans down, he took another deep breath, wiping the sweat off his forehead and closed his eyes momentarily to contain his intense nerves.

“…I’m just tired,” he finally said after managed to regulate his breathing. “Can you come back later instead?”

Although unconvinced, the man gave him a nod.

“Okay, Sir. But can you please sign on this?”

He wanted this person to leave already. But he nodded nevertheless, realizing that it’d probably be faster if he was to settle what needed to be settled there and then.

“Sure,” he said, tapping on his office desk as his staff handed him a document file.

_Aoba, stop_ , he thought internally, feeling Aoba’s tongue motion picking up speed again as he clutched weakly on his pen. A bit more, just a bit more and they would be left alone.

The tip of the pen was already touching the paper before he found his own moan forcing its way out of his throat.  _Aoba was sucking on his balls, his hand pumping roughly over his dick at the same time_.

He felt the pen escaping his clutch, rolling over the table and dropping on the floor. Awkward silence spread between him and his staff. And then, finally giving up, he released a sigh.

“Sorry but I feel a bit lightheaded. Please compile all my work for now and I’ll check them later,” he demanded, trying his very best to give the man before him a stern stare as a final act of composure. “Also, don’t let anyone in.”

Nodding obediently, the man quickly took the piece of document from the desk and retreated to the door.

“I’ll advice you via call if a really urgent matter needs your attention. Please rest properly for now.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

It felt like an eternity when the door finally closed. And it took Noiz another short while to finally glare at Aoba, who was flicking a playful stare at him.

“Goddammit! That was frustrating! You are so fucking cruel, you know?”

Aoba licked the bead away from his slit before he pulled off with an obscene slurp.

“Why me?” he said, his voice slightly hoarse from the deep throating. “You’re the one who told me to do this. Isn't this one of your fantasies?”

A thin frown appeared in between Noiz’s eyebrows as he continued staring at Aoba, who had decided to lick on his dick piercings and suck on them right after.

“It’s not like I wanted someone to come in but…”

Trailing off, Aoba looked up at Noiz, and Noiz felt a chill, a mixture between want and shiver, falling from his head straight down to his crotch.

“You look super hot from down here.”

He could no longer make out what happened after that, the wet sucking noises of saliva being trailed up and down his crotch painted a layer of want in his head.

But despite his half-conscious mind, he could still remember the last thing he heard before he completely surrendered to the unendurable passion Aoba was giving him.

“ _Let me bite you some more_.”

 


	14. Growth; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba realizes tiny differences between him and his boyfriend - something that stab his pride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : on the lips (cute)

Ever since Noiz regained his sensations he’d started picking up small habits that often endeared Aoba to no end. But what Aoba loved most was when he tended to  _touch_ him out of nowhere, be it a passionate or a lighthearted one. He knew that that small action was stemmed from the need to  _feel_  Aoba; and above all, Noiz was curious, and he wanted to tell Aoba how much he loved him, and in turn, feeling Aoba’s love at the same time.

These small actions meant a lot to Aoba, and probably to Noiz as well.

***

 

"Have a good day at work."

Noiz stood rooted, one hand on the doorknob, his eyes staring expectantly at Aoba. He was almost late for work, overslept thanks to their passionate activity the previous night and Aoba had to literally drag him into the bathroom to wake him up.

"What?" Aoba asked, about to return to the living room when he noticed Noiz was still staring at him, like a kid waiting for a hug.

"You forget something," Noiz said casually. 

Shouldn’t it be the other way round?

Another few seconds later, Aoba gave out a quiet ‘oh’ before he paced towards his boyfriend and kissed him softly on the lips.

"Have a good day at work. I’ll be waiting for you to come home."

Smiling satisfyingly, Noiz nodded and finally, stepped out of the house.

Little things like these often warmed Aoba’s heart in ways he couldn’t define. Noiz was, indeed, a growing brat.  _His brat_.

***

When Noiz came home, it was the same all over again. Whenever he launched himself at Aoba the moment he saw his boyfriend, Aoba knew instantly that he had a bad day, which would then urge him to pat him on the head, telling him that he had worked hard.

"Aoba," Noiz said with a small voice, and Aoba knew instantly what he wanted.

Encircling his arms around his boyfriend’s neck, Aoba would then plant a small kiss on Noiz’s lips, patting him on the head and smiling gleefully at him. That was the least he could do for Noiz at that moment of time, but it was exactly what Noiz needed.

***

At first, Aoba thought that all these little actions were those typical mushy interactions couples often shared during the start of their relationship; but soon, he realized that these actions eventually turned into small habits, and before they knew it, it had become some sort of ritual.

Aoba was fine with it. More than fine, actually. What he wasn’t fine with was…

Noiz was staring at him from the doorway again as he busied himself with his Coil. It took only two seconds for Aoba to realize what he’d forgotten as he put his Coil down, strolled towards his waiting boyfriend and was about to give him a farewell kiss when he stopped.

"Say…" he mumbled as Noiz stared surprisingly at him. "You’ve grown taller."

Noiz’s eyes brightened, which did nothing but deepening the frown in between Aoba’s eyebrows.

"Hmm, probably," he said, his eyes wandered to stare at the ceiling before he shifted his gaze back at his boyfriend. "You sure it’s not you who’ve shrunk?"

His question was rewarded with a smack at the head as Aoba pulled his distance away from him, eyeing him from head to toe.

"Stop growing. If this continues it’d look like I’m the younger one in the relationship," Aoba protested.

"Does it matter?" Noiz teased, pulling Aoba over by the waist and resting his chin on top of Aoba’s head.

"It doesn’t but still…" Aoba trailed off. 

"Probably it’s time to invest in some milk, don’t you think?" Noiz continued teasing as he wrapped Aoba’s entire body in his arms. "Now that you mention it, you really feel smaller now."

"At this rate, I’d need to tiptoe to kiss you," Aoba pouted but the intention to pull himself off his young boyfriend had now disappeared from his mind. 

He felt Noiz jolted slightly. Then, he heard a smirk.

"That’s cute."

He wanted to retort further, but his boyfriend seemed happy, causing him to swallow his remaining words down.

Noiz might find it cute, but he needed to work harder…

…growing some height.

 


	15. Almost There; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes place right after the Platinum Jail incident in the anime setting. Fluffy, shameless piece of not-yet-boyfriends NoiAo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is actually a draft of a multi-chap NoiAo canon piece that I'm planning (I already have 8 chapters planned what is happening to my life?) and I needed to get this mood out of my system before I lose it.
> 
> Not-yet-boyfriends NoiAo is precious <3

Everything started with a pure, straightforward intention – all he wanted was to find out how he defeated him in Rhyme. Him, an all-time winner, defeated by a person who had stridently proclaimed that he’d never liked Rhyme, let alone playing one.

It wasn’t something his egoism could endure. If he was to admit his defeat, at the very least, he wanted to find out the answer.

But little did he know that his persistence would not only lead him to discover the answers he wanted, but  _also_  the answer to what he was missing in his life.

“What do you want to do about this?”

He remembered asking Aoba when he realized that he was feeling something  _different_  on his skin, under his skin, beneath his chest. He knew that was pain, the sensation Rhyme had given him in his head had told him enough. But that was not the only  _different_  thing he was feeling. There was something else beneath his chest that was completely unlike what he was feeling now and as far as he knew, that wasn't pain. That was…

He was serious about asking Aoba to take the responsibility, and he knew whatever Aoba said to him was sincere. He knew Aoba was serious about it too. But he also knew that sometimes Aoba needed a push, no matter how determined he was when he’d blurted such life-changing words at him. He would need help,  _especially_  when he was dealing with someone like Noiz, who had never allowed anyone to cross his territory before.

When Aoba read his message, he found his jaw drop. Too surprised to decipher the meaning behind the few texts on his Coil screen, he pressed on the dial button of the person who’d sent him the message instead.

“Noiz?”

There was only silence at the other side of the phone. But he wasn't expecting anything either,  _he_  was the one who’d called him, so naturally,  _he_  should be the one who should lead the conversation.

“Erm, sorry, I…”

“Did you receive my message?” the voice on the other side interrupted him instead.

“Oh, yeah, I did,” Aoba said, still staring dazedly at the letters in front of him.

“So, yeah?” Noiz asked again. His words were always short but for some reason, Aoba could always understand them.

Aoba made a small noise from his throat, telling Noiz enough to make out his answer. And soon, he swore he heard a small sigh of relief from the other side of the call.

“See you, then.”

He didn't even get to ask what was perturbing him in his chest. He could be thinking too much. Maybe.

***

Tapping his feet impatiently, Noiz leaned against the wall of the Seragaki household, eyes unconsciously flicking up to the window at the second floor.

“Sorry, I’m late!” Aoba panted as he ran out of the house.

“Five minutes,” Noiz said, checking the time on his Coil and turning around to walk down the street.

“Sorry,” Aoba repeated frantically as he took quick steps to catch up with Noiz. “Where are we going, by the way?”

“It’s happening.”

He didn't need to ask exactly  _what_  was happening. It was something he was more than familiar with, especially when it was coming from Noiz.

Unconsciously placing his hand on his chest, he sighed quietly. He was  _indeed_  thinking too much. The brat was still a brat and despite all the things they’d gone through together, there was no way he would change in such a short time frame. In fact, he was even surprised to see Noiz approaching him first before he could make his initiatives.

It wasn't anything bad, of course. Truth was, it delighted Aoba to see how more upfront Noiz was with him now.

Perhaps Scrap was the reason for this. Perhaps Scrap was what made Noiz open up to him better.

Walking quietly beside Noiz, they made their way down the Midorijima streets. Ever since the collapse of Oval Tower, slight changes could be seen in the town – specifically on the residents’ reactions, and also how things were getting more in control now than before. Platinum Jail was still in the midst of rebuilding, but access was opened to certain undestroyed places and these spots were eventually turned into activity grounds for not only the Ribs members, but also the Rhyme teams as well.

Although Rhyme activities were heavily impacted with the disappearance of Usui, the game was not completely wiped off yet. There were still traces of Rhymers all over the town while Rhyme activities were constantly being carried out, despite being a smaller scale than before.

And now, they were here, at this part of Platinum Jail which was still uninterrupted and undestroyed. They could hear loud cheers from a huge crowd as they neared the corner leading to a big vacant space. Despite feeling discouraged, Aoba sustained his urge to give out another sigh. He should’ve expected it, anyway. Noiz’s obsession towards Rhyme wasn’t something he could get rid of completely, not to forget that they had yet to settle their rematch. There was no way Noiz would let it go until Aoba fulfilled that promise.

When he was about to turn that corner, Noiz pulled him back by grabbing onto his wrist.

“Hm? Aren't we going…” Aoba started but immediately stopped when he noticed Noiz turning away.

“Not here,” Noiz said briefly and, tightening his grasp on Aoba’s wrist, he led him to a nearby building and took him up a flight of stairs.

Although curious, Aoba followed him without another word. He thought Noiz was about to be involved in yet another Rhyme match or he even wanted Aoba to join him this time. But as their footsteps paced further away from the source of the uproar, Aoba soon realized that this might not be the case after all.

Five flights of stairs later, they found themselves on the rooftop of the building. The curiosity in Aoba was at the verge of becoming unsustainable, almost finding himself throwing questions at Noiz before the nineteen-year-old led him to the edge of the floor. Instantly, Aoba’s eyes brightened upon realizing what he was looking at.

“Sit down.”

Too occupied with the sight in front of him, he only came back to himself when Noiz called out to him. Noiz was already sitting comfortably at the edge of the wall, legs dangling over the wall and looking up at Aoba. Obeying him, Aoba mirrored his posture and sat beside him.

“What is this all about?” Aoba finally asked, eyes still fixed unblinkingly at the colorful, bright lights that were emitted from the Rhyme match below them.

“I thought you like them,” Noiz responded soundlessly, following Aoba’s gaze. As Aoba turned to look at him, he was even mesmerized by how the lights created a beautiful gradient on the other’s face. His eyes twinkled, making his already beautiful lime green eyes to appear even more prominent now that the lights were reflecting directly out of it.

“Rhyme? I never like Rhyme,” Aoba said. But he knew he was wrong. At one point of time, he  _was_  crazily obsessed with Rhyme, probably on the same level as Noiz.

“No,” Noiz responded hastily and Aoba almost missed the word when a loud cheer echoed from below. “The lights,” he continued, pointing at the lights now painting the sky with colorful layers.

He didn't know where Noiz got the idea from. But it wouldn't surprise him anyway, seeing how Noiz tended to speculate things by his own. It was a habit stemmed from his lacked of knowledge for human interaction and sometimes, Aoba had to admit that he found that quality awfully endearing.

He didn't want to tell Noiz that he wasn't particularly fond with the lights, not when Noiz had gone all the way to ask him out just to show him this.

He’d probably even done his own research on exactly which spot would give them the best view, seeing how they managed to capture every single detail of the Rhyme game below them from where they were sitting now.

“So? How is it?” Noiz asked, realizing that the silence between them was stretching out too long.

“Eh?” Aoba gaped, caught off guard. Then, he flashed a bright smile at Noiz. “Yeah, I love them. Thank you.”

He was being honest about it. He’d never loved the lights, never even thought about them. But now that Noiz had pointed out to him, maybe, he would start to like them even more now.

And maybe, with the times he’d be spending with Noiz for the days to come, he’d discover more of these beautiful things that he’d come to love. Including Noiz, of course.

As soon as the thought flashed past his mind, he looked down, suddenly feeling his face burning up as the loud cheers echoed loudly in his ears.

“By the way.”

Noiz’s voice pulled him back from the midst of his thought as he looked back up, almost hitching his breath when he noticed that Noiz had been staring at him.

“That,” Noiz said, pointing at something around his neck.

“Hm?” Confused, Aoba looked down, attempting to catch a glimpse of what Noiz was referring to.

“That headphone,” Noiz clarified upon noticing Aoba’s confusion. “What’s in there?”

Oh, Aoba blurted internally as he took the headphone and lifted it up slightly for Noiz to have a better look.

“Music, of course,” Aoba smiled gleefully at the confused man. “Don’t you listen to music?”

Noiz shook his head, his eyes still fixed at the pink item. Finding it endearing, Aoba took the headphone off his neck and pushed it into Noiz’s hands.

“What?” Noiz mouthed, his fingers unintentionally caressing the item.

“Try it on,” Aoba responded, still with that idiotic smile on his face.

When Noiz hesitated, Aoba shot him a smirk and took the headphone out of his hand as he proceeded to wear it on for him. For a long time, he only stared at the younger man, seeing the way his eyes brightened when Aoba tapped the item on and feeling the way a pang of warmth spread across his chest when he realized how  _cute_  Noiz was at this very moment.

The pink headphone was worn over his beanie, one of his hands holding one side of the headphone as he stared expressionlessly in front of him, obviously trying to concentrate on the beats flowing into his ears. It endeared Aoba on how something as simple as this could draw such a reaction out of Noiz, someone who had been surrounded by vulgar sounds and cruel treatments probably ever since he’d set foot on this island. The pink-colored item looked slightly out of place on Noiz almost entirely green appearance, but Aoba couldn't help but stare, until Noiz took the headphone off and pushed it back to him.

“How was it?” Aoba asked, taking the headphone in his hands and staring expectantly at Noiz.

“Not too bad,” Noiz said, his attention shifted back to the Rhyme battle.

Then, an idea occurred to Aoba.

“Let’s get one for you too,” he said excitedly as he inched closer to Noiz, his grin became wider upon seeing the way Noiz shot him a surprised look.

“What for? I don’t listen to music,” Noiz retorted.

Aoba didn't want to tell him that he’d look cute with a headphone around his neck. Noiz had a point, anyway. It made no sense for him to buy something that he wouldn't use. Realizing how self-indulging he was, Aoba increased their distance, admitting defeat.

Their conversation ended there. Their remaining time spent staring at the Rhyme battle, and they only left when the match came to an end.

But that didn't mean that their interaction ended there and then.

The next day, Aoba received yet another message from Noiz. This time, though, instead of calling him, he replied him with a “ _Sure, let’s go together ^^_ ”. He was trying not to think too much, trying not to look too deep into what was happening between them now. Noiz hadn't been in such a close relationship with anyone else before. Heck, he didn't even have anyone he could call a friend. So it’d be natural for him to become so attached to Aoba like this. Aoba – a person who had been attempting to know more about him like no else ever did; who accepted him in such an unconditioned way. No matter what it was, it made Aoba happy. Seeing how receptive he was towards things now, Aoba was sure that he’d be able to escape from his own shell in no time.

“Sorry, I’m late!”

“Ten minutes,” Noiz said indifferently as he checked the time on his Coil. “Why are you always late?”

He didn't sound angry, and Aoba knew that he was asking out of pure curiosity.

“I forgot something,” he said with an apologetic smile.

Giving out a small hum, Noiz turned away and walked down the street, leaving Aoba hurrying up to catch up with him.

“Anyway, where are we going today?” he asked.

Noiz took a while to answer. Looking back his shoulder, he flashed Aoba a smirk as he answered him with that same indifferent voice of his.

“The electronic shop.”

Probably Aoba was too naive to even think that he was starting to become more receptive towards things around him. Because as far as he was concerned, Noiz was probably becoming more receptive towards things that  _Aoba_  had shown him.

They still had a long way to go. And across time, they’d noticed how their relationship would change, starting from being friends, and eventually, to becoming a pair of not-yet-boyfriends.

 


	16. Secret Appearance; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba came home from Midorijima to find himself staring at a Noiz who looked... slightly different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : "Can I tell you a secret?"
> 
> Do also checked out [polyvinylmonster's gorgeous comic](http://polyvinylmonster.tumblr.com/post/98443266145/polyvinylparfait-in-which-aoba-went-back-to) that ended up killing me.

Three days of separation wasn't long. It was a time frame both Aoba and Noiz had gotten used to. It was not like they were completely separated anyway. They were still constantly connected via calls and Aoba had made it a compulsory for Noiz to pick up his call whenever he called.

"Are you okay?"   
“Yeah, a bit.”

The voice from the other side was slightly hoarse, and Aoba could hear a few coughs that Noiz were obviously trying to hide.

"You sure?" he asked again. Noiz undoubtedly caught the worries in his tone because he gave out yet another cough, and the next time he opened his mouth, his voice was clearer and louder than before.

"Yeah, I’m just sleep deprived."  
“Go get some sleep then. What time is it over there? 1 am?” Aoba pressed. He was sure that he’d make Noiz obey to his unspoken house rule when he was around.  
“A bit more. It’s urgent.”

_What’s more urgent than your health_? was what Aoba wanted to say before he heard the sound of flipping papers from the phone. Giving out a sigh, he spoke.

"Not too late, alright?"

He heard a hum, and after bidding each other goodnight, they hung the call. Walking down the stairs, he stared out of the window, sighed at the cloudy sky outside of the house and opened up his Coil again.

“ _Remember to eat. And sleep earlier_.”

He was grateful that he was going back tomorrow. Otherwise he was sure that Noiz would probably work over the clock again. It wasn’t like he was ignoring what Aoba had asked him to do. But sometimes, when he was too indulged in something, he tended to forget not only time but everything else around him.

And Aoba knew that perfectly well.

****

"I’m home!"

"Aoba is back! Welcome home, Aoba!"

The first thing he saw was the green usagimodoki cube floating out from a corner and stopping directly in front of him. Giving it a smile, he looked around the place.

"Where’s Noiz?"  
“Noiz is—”

"Welcome home."

The mere sight in front of him made his jaw drop.

Three days of separation wasn't long. For the many days they had been separated in the past, nothing would ever change between them. Whenever Aoba came back, he would be immediately greeted by Noiz, who would give him his usual signature smirk and he would then mirror that smile. And before they could even update each other about their well being, they’d find themselves all over each other, when hugs turned into kisses and kisses turned into something more.

But this time, a distance was spread in between them. Aoba stood frozen at the doorframe, mouth hanging open with his eyes fixed unblinkingly at the man in front of him; while Noiz merely stared, confused. As he was about to walk towards his boyfriend, Aoba stopped him.

"Wait, wait, wait!" he exclaimed, hands shaking violently in front of him and effectively stopping Noiz in his tracks. "W-who are you?"

A frown appeared in between Noiz’s eyebrows almost instantly.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, seriousness evident in his tone.

"No, I mean, why do you look like that?"

Time stopped, the air around them frozen. Then, after what felt like forever, Noiz gave out a small chuckle that eventually turned into a loud laugh.

He was aware of how miserable he looked like now, the few sleepless nights and nonstop workload had taken a toll on him, evident from the dark circles under his eyes and his eyes which were slightly red. Even though he’d taken a few days of break from work just to stop himself from getting distracted from human matters in the company, he was practically occupied with work the entire time. Barely having any time to even eat, needless to say, grooming became the least of his concern. He’d hated it. But now that he witnessed Aoba’s reaction, he thought perhaps this wasn't exactly something too bad after all.

Before he could respond, though, Ren poked his head out of Aoba’s bag, breaking the awkwardness between them.

"Aoba, it’s called growing facial hair. When a perso—"  
“I know what it is!” Aoba frantically replied, momentarily distracted by his Allmate before he shifted his attention back to the man in front of him.

"So?" Noiz asked, still with the smirk on his face as he leaned against the wall, seemingly enjoying Aoba’s reaction.

"So what?"

"What do you think about it?"

"Eh? About what?"

"This."

Illustrating his point, Noiz brought his hand to his chin, teasingly rubbing at the spot where a few strands of short blond hair could be seen forming on his skin.

"Maybe I should consider growing them, don’t you think?" he continued, without waiting for Aoba’s answer. "It would probably make me look even more professional."

Now, Aoba’s head was slowly starting to pick up pace. Noiz’s words finally making their way into his senses, his eyes brightened as he stepped a step back, portraying an expression filled with shock.

"No," he started soft." No, no, no! Don’t you dare."

"Why not?" Noiz grinned as he made his way towards his boyfriend and trapping him against the door.

He didn't know the answer. Or perhaps he did, if Noiz hadn't been inching so close towards him and disturbing his rationality.

Their noses almost touching, he could barely feel Noiz’s facial hair against his skin before the sensation became stronger when Noiz pressed his lips against his.

Their kiss lingered for a few seconds before Aoba pushed him away, rubbing painfully at the spot where Noiz had just poked him.

"You know why? It’s because it tickles when we kiss," he blurted out mindlessly, feeling his face burning up at the same time.

"You don’t like it?" Noiz teased again, about to grasp on Aoba’s chin when the other struggled out of his embrace.

"Of course I don’t! It tickles."

"Hmmm."

Noiz flicked his gaze up to stare at the ceiling, seemingly thinking of something before he turned and looked at Aoba again.

"I’ll get rid of them then," he said. And without another word, he turned his back towards Aoba and headed to the bathroom, leaving Aoba all alone in the living room, without a clue of what he should do now.

***

The next time he saw Noiz, his face was clean off facial hair, the usual smooth and sleek skin Aoba was so used to returned to where it belonged. Now Noiz was drying his hair, with only a towel around his waist as he stared at himself in the bathroom mirror.

When he finally settled on the bed with Aoba, Aoba stopped him before he could pull him into a long-awaited hug.

"Wait," Aoba said, holding up a hand and eyes unconsciously scanning the other’s body. "Do you grow hair here too?"

Following his finger, Noiz gave out a small chuckle upon realizing that he was pointing at his chest.

"I don’t. My face is the only part where hair grows, unless you want to count the  _other_ part.”

Scowling, Aoba smacked Noiz on the head before he spread his arms wide, signaling Noiz to come over. As soon as Noiz was wrapped comfortably in Aoba’s embrace, Aoba stroked his hair instinctively, feeling the wetness on his fingertips.

"Seeing you like that really surprised me," he said, wearing a stupid grin as if he was laughing at himself. "When I saw you like that, I thought ‘ah, my brat has grown up’ then you started smirking and doing all sorts of thing and I was immediately brought back to the reality that you haven’t really grown anyway."

"That’s kinda rude," Noiz retorted as he looked up at Aoba with a small pout on his face. "I've grown up, you know."

Aoba laughed.

"Yeah, of course I know. You’ve grown to be such a great responsible adult. But I can’t help it. To me you’ll always be that brat who had barged his way into my room just to check out my Allmate system."

That was a part of history that neither Noiz nor Aoba could change. But it was still something they held close to their heart.

"Say…" Aoba trailed off when the silence became a bit too pronounced. "Can I tell you a secret?"

Curious, Noiz sat up, sharing the same eye level as Aoba as he waited expectantly for Aoba to continue.

"I know I've said that I don’t want you to keep… you know…" Looking away, he gave out an unnatural sounding cough, obviously to hide his embarrassment. "But I.. I kinda like it when you look a bit… different like that. It’s like… you've grown up and it.." Pausing for a while, he looked back at Noiz, now with a faint hint of pink on his cheeks. "…it makes me happy."

He immediately broke eye contact with Noiz the moment he finished his words. Before he could think of something to uphold his pride, Noiz was already pulling him into a hug as he kissed him on the forehead.

He had always been thinking of ways to make Aoba happy. He tried buying him presents (at one point in time he actually bought him something every week, resulting in a furious Aoba); he tried bringing him to places. But none of those had made Aoba smile so genuinely like this.

A mischievous thought flashing past his head, he released Aoba and smirked naughtily at him.

"I think I’d like to reconsider keeping it then."

He almost burst out laughing seeing the way Aoba’s face became redder with every passing second. Even when the pillow made its way across his face he could clearly make out what Aoba was yelling at him.

_"I said no! Learn to respect elderly, brat!"_

There would come a day when Noiz would be the one to witness the changes in Aoba. But regardless of what it’d be –appearance or something else- he was sure that it’d surprise him as much as how Aoba was surprised by  _his_  momentary change.

With that thought in mind, he found a new sense of longing blossoming within him as he hugged Aoba from behind, feeling the other returning his intimacy and effectively drawing a smile on his face. 

 


	17. Genuine; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They never knew what to do for each other's birthday. But when Noiz decided to do _that something_ for Koujaku, the result was unexpectedly positive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : "I like when you smile"
> 
> Also written for Koujaku's birthday.

The first year they spent their birthday together, they had completely zero clue on how they should go about it. Koujaku would suggest something sappy, but Noiz would obviously disgust over that mere idea. So on Noiz’s birthday, Koujaku brought him out for dinner, telling him that he had had enough unhealthy food in his entire life. It wasn't too bad of an experience, albeit awkward.

When it was time for Koujaku’s birthday, the younger man sat, unsure of what to do for his boyfriend. He didn't want to repeat history, and it shouldn't, seeing how this was supposed to be the first time he was to celebrate the birthday of someone who’d changed his worldview.

 

On the day of Koujaku’s birthday, the hairdresser was nowhere to be seen. Noiz assumed that he would be busy attending to his team members and clients to even have the time to spend with Noiz. Furthermore, Noiz never brought anything up to him, so it was just natural to assume that he didn't have anything planned for the day. 

But that wasn't true. He  _did_  have something planned for him.

It was after midnight that Koujaku made his way up to his front door, slightly tipsy and almost falling down the stairs when he missed a step. Before he could push the key into the hole, the door sprung open, revealing a young man.

“Had fun?” Noiz asked emotionlessly, moving aside to make way for Koujaku to move into the room.

“Guess so,” Koujaku replied after he gave out a small hiccup. 

But no matter how tipsy he could be, there was no way he could overlook the slight difference he noticed in his house.

“Noiz, what is…” he trailed off, staring bewilderingly at his surroundings.

Instead of the usual red, the walls in his room were now filled with a layer of green, the color not too strong but thick enough to make an impression.

“What is this all about?” he finally finished his sentence, turning around to look at Noiz for answers.

“I’m moving in,” Noiz said nonchalantly, moving away from the hairdresser’s side and into the kitchen.

“You what?”

“I said, I’m moving in,” Noiz’s voice was feeble from the kitchen. When Koujaku was about to confront him further, he found his voice trapped in his throat when he saw what Noiz was holding in his hand.

“And, I made this,” Noiz continued indifferently, now walking closer to Koujaku.

Noiz was holding a cake in his hand, the weak lights from the candles just enough for Koujaku to make out the words written on top of the frosting.

_Happy Birthday, Koujaku._

Noiz had given him a lot of nicknames over time. It was a genuine surprise to see how he’d carved his  _name_  on the cake today. It meant more than just a form of addressing him, because for Koujaku, it also meant that Noiz was acknowledging him, not simply as an old man on the street, or a thick-headed skull of a Rib member, but as  _Koujaku_.

Unable to suppress his happiness, Koujaku gave out a smile and reached out to ruffle Noiz’s hair.

“Thank you, Noiz.”

He was sure that Noiz was totally unsure of what to do for his birthday, just like how he was uncertain of what to do for  _his_. But no matter what the younger man tried to do, he knew that it’d mean something for him. Because it meant something for Noiz, and that should be more than enough.

“So you fine with me moving in?” Noiz asked after placing the cake on the table.

“I don’t think a ‘no’ works on you,” Koujaku teased, grasping on Noiz’s arm and urging him to sit down with him.

Noiz remained silent, and Koujaku knew that he was thinking too hard again.

“Don’t worry,” he said, ruffling Noiz’s hair again. “I’m happy you decided to move in. I really do. It’s the best birthday present I could ever received.”

That drew a small, relieved smile out of Noiz and Koujaku thought that he’d forgotten how to breathe for a second.

“What?” Noiz asked when he realized that Koujaku was staring, mouth hanging open, at him.

“Ah, nothing,” Koujaku said, scratching the back of his head and averting Noiz’s gaze. “It’s just that…”

“Hmm?”

“I like when you smile.”

He didn't want to admit that he found Noiz to be even more gorgeous than he already was when he smiled. But on top of that, he didn't want to admit that Noiz’s smile was a portrayal of genuine emotion. An emotion so real and an emotion directed at  _him_.

He was happy that he’d managed to draw such an expression out of Noiz, despite the other being disinterested at most time. Seeing his genuine emotion made him feel real; it triggered something inside him and in turn, made him feel alive.

“Me too.”

He almost missed what Noiz was saying but he came back just in time to catch the two words.

“What?”

“I like when you smile too. Not the kind of smile you give your clients, but the kind of smile when…” Noiz left his words hanging in midair before he continued. “Like how you’re smiling at me now.”

At that moment of time, Koujaku – once again- realized that they were not much difference from each other after all.

And he wondered exactly how long had Noiz been observing him, probably a lot more than how he’d keep an eye on the younger man.

 


	18. Cute Brat; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of the rare times when Koujaku admitted that Noiz was cute, something he couldn't believe himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : "You're cute but we're not going to be a thing"
> 
> Attempted a different writing style for this pairing uvu

Koujaku’s and Noiz’s first acquaintance was far from cute.

The mere mention of a Rhyme team had twitched one of Koujaku’s nerves; but what actually drove him up the wall was Noiz’s indifferent, ignorant, obnoxious attitude when the nineteen-year-old did nothing at all but ignore him. 

He hated Rhyme. He hated the brat. 

He was sure of that.

 

"Relax, Koujaku." 

No matter how many times he’d expressed his irritation towards the brat, his complaints often ended with Aoba giving him a bitter smile as he brushed his comments off. 

"Why are you even so mad at him when he did nothing at all?" Aoba continued teasing him over dinner. He didn’t even do it on purpose. Before he knew it, the brat had made his way into his frame of thought, pissing him off for reasons unknown. Surrendering to his uncontainable pressure, he started blurting about how he found Rhyme annoying; how he found Noiz disrespectful; how hideous Noiz’s fashion sense was; how irritated he was with Noiz’s piercings and his face in general. 

Noiz, Noiz, Noiz.

Until Aoba coughed loudly and stopped his sentence in midair that he finally realized that he was going overboard. He overdid it. Again. 

"Cut him some slack," Aoba continued as he refilled Koujaku’s bowl with more rice. "He’s only nineteen. He has yet to learn more about the world." 

'Only nineteen' wasn't an excuse.

But ‘only nineteen’ was a trait. Noiz’s trait. 

*** 

There were times when the brat was nowhere to be seen. Sometimes he was completely unheard and unseen for days, weeks even. Then, suddenly, he would appear in front of Aoba’s house, an indifferent expression gracing his features, as if his disappearance meant nothing at all. 

"Anything to eat?" He would ask the older man, who often gave him an awkward smile before he invited him into the house, only to find out that he was only interested with his Allmate. 

"You could’ve just told me," Aoba scowled at him from across the table, eyes staring unwaveringly at Ren while Noiz booted his Allmate system up.  

"Will you allow me to check him out if I ask?" Noiz asked instead, fingers dancing gracefully on the keyboard, his eyes stuck on the hologram screen he’d just summoned. 

"Well, if you ask properly." 

That was how Noiz learned how to ask.  

*** 

"What do you mean you let him come over everyday?"  

A meet-up in Black Needle revealed to Koujaku how Aoba had allowed Noiz to stop by his house everyday, just to check out his Allmate. 

"You sure he hasn’t gotten any other motives?" Koujaku asked again, without waiting for the answer to his first question. 

"He doesn’t mean any harm, Koujaku. Stop treating him like a terrorist," Aoba reprimanded, although there was no way he could hide his snicker at how Koujaku tended to be so worked up whenever it came to anything concerning the youngest man. 

"I’m not," Koujaku retorted, draining the remaining of his alcohol down his throat. 

"You sure?" Aoba asked teasingly, but immediately swallowed the remains of his teases down when he noticed a blush appearing on Koujaku’s cheek.  

It could be the alcohol. Nothing else. 

Only Koujaku would know the answer to that reaction. But the problem was - he didn’t. 

*** 

"Oi." 

Two days later, he found Noiz walking towards the Seragaki household. Leaning against the wall outside Aoba’s house, he stopped Noiz, immediately causing the other to stare curiously at him. 

"You’re stopping by again today," Koujaku said. It wasn’t a question and Noiz knew it. 

"Problem?" 

This was exactly why Koujaku was so fired up with Noiz. ‘Respect’ was never in the brat’s dictionary and, even though he didn’t want to admit the slight age gap between them, he deemed himself worthy for at least  _some_  respect. 

"What exactly do you want from him?" he continued, clenching one of his fists and trying to contain his raging nerves at the same time. 

"I don’t want anything from him," Noiz responded casually as he paced closer towards the gate. "I’m only interested with his Allmate." 

That successfully drew a frown in between Koujaku’s eyebrows. But before he could interrogate him further, Noiz continued. 

"…which I’m done for now." 

"What?" 

Stepping away from the gate, Noiz turned his back towards Koujaku and headed down the street without another word. He hated when questions weren’t answered and when he was so purposefully ignored in such a casual way.  

He hated Noiz. 

"Oi," he called out again, rushing up to Noiz and grabbing him on the shoulder, which resulted in a furious Noiz brushing his hand off his shoulder as he scowled heavily at Koujaku. 

"What do you want?"  

He didn’t know what he wanted. Gaping momentarily at Noiz, he swallowed thickly down his throat before he started. 

"I want to ask you something," he said, noticing the shivers in his voice and cursing internally at himself for being so indecisive. 

"What?" Noiz repeated, still with the scowl on his face. 

Again, he didn’t know the answer, more like he didn’t know how he should begin. 

When the awkward silence between them spread for a bit too long, Noiz turned around, finally facing the older man as he leaned forward to flash him a playful smirk. 

"Don’t tell me," he said with a feverish whisper, his voice so small Koujaku almost missed it from the loud heartbeats in his ears. "…you’re interested in me?" 

Then, the sound of his heartbeat disappeared, along with the surrounding sound. 

"What?! Who would be interested in you?!" he exclaimed, stepping a step back as he felt the annoyance returning to his nerves when he saw Noiz giving out a light lick on his lips. 

That was how he got involved with Noiz. 

*** 

Noiz was extremely curious. At first, he found the older man annoying. He jumped at everything, he assumed way too much, and he was so loud it was annoying.  

But when he first saw Koujaku gaping at him, stuttering with a faint hint of pink on his face, it raised his interest.  

A loud, muscular man - blushing and stuttering at a brat like him. Interesting. 

He couldn’t find anything in Ren, disappointed him greatly upon realizing that he’d lost another source of enjoyment now that he knew that Ren was merely a normal old Allmate modal. He was about to seek elsewhere for something better to do, probably a few more Rhyme matches and probably, this time, a stronger opponent would appear.  

But now, that intention was completely wiped away. 

It took three knocks for Koujaku to finally open his door. Staring wide-eyed at the unexpected guest, he only came back to himself when Noiz was already settled comfortably on his bed, a few hologram screens surrounding him as he ignored the frozen man at the doorway, as if he actually owned the place. 

"Why are you here? What do you want?"  

Koujaku threw him countless questions but he answered none of them. He knew he was annoying the Ribster; he knew he was risking a few of his bones; and he knew he was taking a chance - a chance he deemed slim. 

"Bored," he replied finally, instantly halting Koujaku’s interrogations as the other stopped, staring at him as if he was an alien. 

"I don’t have anything to entertain you, brat," Koujaku said through gritted teeth.  

Noiz hummed lightly before he looked up at shot Koujaku a small smirk. 

“ _You_  are entertaining.” 

That successfully boiled Koujaku’s blood. He was so close to throwing the brat out of his window when Noiz suddenly lied flat on his back, giving out a small yawn that effectively forced the words down Koujaku’s throat. 

"Tired." He heard the brat said, and before he could say or do anything, Noiz was rolling under his blanket as he wrapped himself in the warmth.  

He couldn’t believe this. It must be a trap. 

Then, Noiz gave out a soft snore, and Koujaku knew that he was far too gone to even care if it was a real trap or not. All he knew was Noiz was gracing this adorable, peaceful, naive feature that perfectly spelt his age. And no matter how obnoxious a brat he could be, there was no way Koujaku could raise his voice at him now, let alone throwing him out of the house. 

*** 

When he woke up the next morning, he found his breath trapped in his chest when he realized an additional weight on his body. He blinked a few times, adjusting his eyes to the sunlight now pouring into the room, and almost gasped out loud when he realized that Noiz was  _hugging_  him in his sleep.  

Since when did he put his guard down? And since when did he fall asleep? He was supposed to keep an eye on the brat in case he was to launch a sudden attack at him. 

But none of them was necessary after all. Noiz wasn’t going to launch an attack. He wasn’t going to do anything at all. He was just being a brat who, like a normal kid, yearned for attention, for warmth, and maybe… for love. 

Blushing at the thought, Koujaku coughed loudly, cursing at himself for even allowing such thought to make its way into his head, before he felt Noiz moving in his embrace.  

"M’nin." 

The voice he was once familiar with suddenly became unfamiliar to him. The once indifferent tone was now groggy, hoarse even, and it did things to Koujaku. 

"Morning," he responded awkwardly, not knowing what else to say. 

Then, he heard a small smirk, and he turned his head to see Noiz staring at him, the tease evident in his eyes. 

_Ah, he was the brat, after all_ , Koujaku thought internally, suddenly frustrated at himself for overreacting over something so obvious. 

Noiz was about to say something but Koujaku held his hand up, stopping him. 

"I think we need to make this clear," he said loudly, his tone unnaturally high. "Y-you’re cute but we’re not going to be a thing." 

He felt like stabbing himself in the chest. ‘Cute’? Really? 

Noiz seemed to be reading his mind as his smirk deepened. Crawling on top of Koujaku, he brought their faces closer, their noses almost touching. 

"Cute?" the brat repeated and Koujaku almost choked on his saliva. "Cute." 

He didn’t know what had gotten into him. He didn’t even know why he had said the word out loud, his mouth seemed to have worked faster than his brain.  

But he knew that the brat was less annoying now, probably would be a lot lesser with time.  

Probably.

 


	19. Passion; Koujaku/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He didn't need the moon to tell him how beautiful Koujaku was - because he knew that Koujaku was far more gorgeous than that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **PROMPT** : Sweet and passionate
> 
> Written for Mooncake Festival.

Aoba wasn’t sure since when did Koujaku started developing this habit of sitting by the window and gazing mindlessly at the sky, sometimes with a cigarette dangling in between his lips. He’d given up advising Koujaku on how harmful that seemingly harmless stick was; he’d known it was a habit Koujaku had picked up since a long time ago, the time when Aoba had yet to replace a mere stick’s place as his source of relief.

 

Usually, he’d be able to gauge if Koujaku was once again immersed too deep in his own thoughts, probably thinking about the past, the present, or even the future when Aoba had reminded him countless times on how he shouldn’t worry himself with things that were still unknown. But Aoba knew that Koujaku was a natural worrywart, yet _another_  habit he had picked up when he had no one to express his anxieties to, and he didn’t blame him, often allowing him to be and allowing time to heal his healing wounds.

Tonight, though, the usual miserable look was nowhere to be seen. What Koujaku was gracing on his face was instead a peaceful smile, his eyes gazing tenderly at something Aoba couldn’t see, a sake bottle on the window sill. A quick look at a corner told Aoba that both Ren and Beni had retreated earlier for the night. Pacing quietly towards the older man, he tried to keep his footsteps light, his breathing soft as he closed their distance.

"Done with shower?" Koujaku asked upon noticing Aoba inching towards him.

Aoba made a small noise from his throat, joining Koujaku at the bed while the other picked the sake bottle up and waved it in front of him.

"Want some?" he asked gleefully, discarding his cigarette at the same time.

Aoba shook his hand. “No thanks. I need to work tomorrow and the last thing I need is to get a hangover for the rest of the day.”

Koujaku gave out a dry laugh. Gulping some of the alcohol down, he stretched his arm at Aoba.

"Come here."

One of the many things Aoba loved about Koujaku was how easily he could accommodate himself in his embrace, perfectly warm and comfortable. When they intertwined their fingers together, he remembered how they used to do this - when they were young and naive and pretty much unknown to the world - Koujaku would take Aoba’s hand in his, telling him that everything would be okay and that he’d always have his back. He never broke his promise. Despite the few years of separation, Aoba still saw the hero figure in him the first time they set eyes on each other when Koujaku returned. It gave Aoba a sense of assurance, telling him that Koujaku was still the same, and he would always be.

"The moon is so bright tonight."

He heard Koujaku mumbled beside his ears, felt the other’s fingers instinctively reached out to play with the tips of his now short hair, and hitched a breath when the smell of alcohol invaded his nose.

So that was what Koujaku was looking at the entire time. He wasn’t spacing out, his mind wasn’t occupied by unnecessary negativities; instead, his gaze was fixed on a certain prettiness, something Aoba could easily see in him, and for once in the many occasions, he was appreciating the beauty around him with his mind filled with peaceful gracefulness.

Nodding, Aoba moved his gaze to the moon, his eyes immediately brightened when he found what he was looking for.

Koujaku was right. The moon was beautiful tonight, perhaps one of the most beautiful ones he had ever seen.

He wanted to tell Koujaku that it reminded of him, but then, he felt a warm sensation against the back of his neck as Koujaku shifted him to sit in between his legs.

"I love how short your hair is now," Koujaku mumbled against he back of his neck, his sensitive spot. "It makes access to here easier."

Aoba wanted to make a retort, but whatever words he intended to say was immediately forced back down his throat when he felt Koujaku’s tongue pressing against his skin.

"O-oi, don’t…"he responded weakly, clutching on Koujaku’s arm for support as he stifled his voice.

It must be the smell of the alcohol; or perhaps, Koujaku’s scent could be contagious, addictive even. He managed to struggle out of the hairdresser’s firm grasp as he turned around, intending to give his boyfriend a stern stare when the sight in front of him hung his words in midair.

Moonlight was now pouring into their room, the dim lighting created a tender gradient on Koujaku’s face, who was a bit red on the cheeks and who was smiling gently at him. Seeing this, Aoba couldn’t help but cupped his face as he inched closer to him and gave him a smile, perfectly mirroring the one Koujaku was giving him.

"You’re beautiful too, Koujaku. Everything of you are beautiful,"he said, planting a kiss on the scar on the bridge of his nose, then planting another kiss on the tattoo beside his eyes. "Even these. They are beautiful too."

He never knew what Koujaku wanted to say because after that, he was caught in a feverish, passionate kiss. He could feel the taste of alcohol even stronger now when Koujaku plunged his tongue into his mouth, their lips pressing firmly against each other as wet sounds started echoing around the room.

Aoba didn’t need a bright, beautiful moon to tell him how gorgeous and how strong Koujaku was. Koujaku was his hero, after all. And he would always be.

 


	20. Vision [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba settling in his new job; but nothing really changes after all. Well, nothing much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for Megane Day. I have a terrible megane kink u/////u
> 
> The beautiful illustration was drawn by [Fran](http://keepcalmkeepdrawing.tumblr.com/post/99004525609/i-read-this-cute-fanfic-by-shino-cchi-and-i) <3

 

When Aoba first located himself a job in Noiz’s company, Noiz wanted him to share the same working space with him. But rules and protocols and so-called organization ladders and pyramid he never cared got into his way, leaving him with no choice but to obey. The most he could do was getting a space right outside of his room for Aoba, who shrugged and almost lectured him for being immature until he saw Noiz giving him a look that spelled “please”, effectively forcing the reprimands down his throat.

 

Aoba was sure that the reason Noiz had been so persistence with having him by his side was not only stemmed from the need to keep an eye on him. He knew that Noiz trusted him enough to allow him to venture into this new corporate yet foreign world on his own. Noiz was pretty smart himself. Filled with astounding charisma, and despite his groomed appearance which did nothing but make him look even more prominent, Aoba knew that he was still a young growing brat within him.

No matter how professional or how outstanding Noiz was as an individual, Aoba knew that his age couldn’t deceive how he really felt within him. He was definitely intelligent, his ability to suit himself in a world that was once foreign to him —that once abandoned him— had said enough to prove that. But with great responsibilities come great pressure and there was no way a nineteen-year-old man could withstand so much commitments without taking a step back and slowing his pace down.

This was where Aoba came in. Because Aoba knew that besides of wanting to make sure that Aoba was completely safe and comfortable with his working environment, Noiz was also seeking out for his own assurance. It didn’t matter to Aoba, anyway. Their feelings were mutual - because he also wanted to be there when Noiz needed the support. So he simply allowed him to be, despite knowing how his action might potentially erode his professionalism.

***

When Aoba first located himself in the office, he already predicted that he’d need some time to get use to his surrounding. Fortunately, people around him had been treating him well, regardless of whether they were doing it under the order of Noiz or out of sincerity. One thing that Aoba was sure of, however, was how genuinely happy Noiz’s brother was — perhaps even more than him — when he noticed Aoba sitting on a desk right outside Noiz’s room. His greeting was as warm as how Aoba remembered it to be, and his handshake, along with his hug, was no less tighter than usual. He chased Aoba’s worries and insecurity temporarily away when he did that. Aoba was grateful for that. There wasn’t a need for every single person to give him a warm welcome to make him feel better. The only thing that should matter to him was how people who mattered welcomed him into their life. And so far, everything was progressing greatly.

He’d expected himself to learn new things - operational matters, the new people he would be working with, and more importantly, his job scope. He was fortunate to have a person who knew how to converse in Japanese sitting right beside him (he even suspected Noiz had arranged it on purpose) but what he never expected to learn was…

"Come in."

It felt surreal to knock on the door of his young boyfriend, their positions now different, almost as if the intimate relationship they shared was an illusion. He felt himself shiver slightly when he opened the door and walked into the room. But the moment he saw his young boyfriend looking up at him from behind his desk, the unnecessary overloaded thoughts were immediately chased out of his mind.

"Why are you staring at my face like that?" Noiz asked, the familiar smirk he was wearing on his face reinstalled the security back into Aoba.

"I didn’t know you wear glasses," Aoba responded after a two seconds pause.

"Oh, this?" Noiz said, taking the black-rimmed glasses off his face and waving it in front of Aoba. "A Scottish supplier brought it for me as a souvenir so I thought of trying it out." Then, giving out a small hum, he put the glasses back on. "Does it look good on me?"

Totally lost for words, Aoba scrolled towards him instead, stopping only when he came face-to-face with his superior as he examined Noiz’s features.

The glasses instilled a sense of maturity in Noiz. It definitely made him look more professional. But Aoba couldn’t help but give out a small chuckle as he reached out to caress the sides of the glasses.

"You look so cute," he commented, instantly drawing a surprised look out of Noiz.

But that momentary surprised expression was replaced by a smug look almost immediately as Noiz took the glasses out again before he pulled Aoba over by the wrist.

"Wh—"

Almost losing balance, Aoba grasped onto Noiz table, about to send a glare at Noiz’s direction when the glasses that was in Noiz’s hand just a second ago was now pushed onto Aoba’s face instead.

"Now who’s the cute one?"

His eyesight wasn’t too bad but when his vision upgraded to a higher definition quality he immediately thought that perhaps he should reconsider getting it checked. Noiz was still grinning at him when Aoba looked around the place with the black-rimmed glasses on his face, totally forgotten about the tease Noiz had thrown back at him until he felt a soft peck on his cheek.

"You like it? I’ll give it to you," Noiz said beside his ear.

"Ah, no, no," Aoba responded frantically. "It’s your souvenir."

He was about to take it off when Noiz stopped him. Instead, he adjusted the item on his face and stared at Aoba for a few moments before he broke into a smile.

"What’s mine is yours as well," he said, giving Aoba a kiss on the nose before he finally released him.

When he first came into the office, he had walked in with the resolution to work the best out of what he had. He wanted to see Noiz as a superior. But now, it seemed like it wasn’t necessary after all. In fact, with how Noiz intended to treat Aoba not only in their own private space but in a public —professional, even— space like this, it wasn’t possible after all.

Because Noiz never considered him as any way lower than him before. And that was the greatest reassurance he could ever get.


	21. Wet Kisses [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was just a simple date out, but Mother Nature has better plans for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wet NoiAo, literally. It had been raining nonstop for quite some time when I wrote this so it kinda inspired it. 
> 
> Prompt written for tumblr user [kaleidoscope13579](http://kaleidoscope13579.tumblr.com/).

“Hmm…”

Staring at the two shirts he’d laid out on the bed, Aoba supported his chin with his hand as a deep scowl formed in between his eyebrows.

“Ren, which do you think is better?”

As if on cue, Ren jumped onto the bed, eyes shifting between the two options. It took him a minute to finally point at the white-colored shirt as he looked up at Aoba.

“I think white suits Aoba better.”

“You think so?” Aoba reconfirmed. Truth be told, he agreed with Ren, the only thing stopping him to finally make his decision being his own self-conscious.

“By the way, Aoba,” Ren called out again while Aoba continued pondering.

“Hm?”

“If you don’t go now, we’ll be late for the appointment.”

“What time is it now?”

“10.45 a.m.”

Which was… 15 minutes to his appointment with Noiz.

Eh.

“You should’ve told me earlier!”

Frantically grabbing the clothing from the bed, Aoba ran into the bathroom, coming back few minutes later as he grabbed his bag and ran down the stairs, almost tripping when he missed a step.

Noiz had left the house even before the sun rise this morning for an important teleconference call. Aoba vaguely remembered him giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek before he left the room. It was one hour later that he finally got himself out of bed, glancing around the empty space of his room, suddenly feeling awkward for being left alone on a weekend. Usually, by now, he’d find a clingy boyfriend – either wrapping him into a hug so firm he’d have to shun him away so that he could even move; or staring at him as he made breakfast for them in the kitchen – but now that none of these were within proximity, he couldn’t help but give out a soft sigh, suddenly feeling bad for even pushing Noiz away when he tended to become too attached to him.

But his loneliness was short-lived because as soon as he made his way out of the bathroom, his Coil rang and the instance he saw Noiz’s name on the hologram screen, he broke into an involuntary smile.

“You’re finally up.” Noiz’s greeting wiped the grin away from Aoba’s face, replacing it with a pout instead as he hugged his pillow and settled himself on the bed.

“That’s not really what I want to hear so early in the morning, you know,” he complained while Noiz’s curved the corner of his lips slightly, just visible for Aoba to see.

“How about, ‘do you want to meet me in town today?’” Noiz said.

The trick worked.

“I’ll be done with my meeting in an hour time so I’m thinking if you want to join me on a food-hunting mission downtown,” Noiz continued, without waiting for Aoba to respond. He already knew what Aoba was about to say anyway, the astonished look on his face being the best indicator.

“On?”

“What time?” Aoba finally asked, completely abandoning his pillow now as he looked at Noiz with a huge beam on his face. It had been a while since they explored town together, the mere idea thrilled him greatly.

“Say about…” He saw Noiz’s eyes move to the corner of the screen to check on the time before he returned his gaze on Aoba. “11.00 a.m.? I’ll meet you at our usual café. Oh, and,” Noiz shifted his gaze to another screen on the left. “bring an umbrella. Seems like it’s gonna rain.”

“Deal.”

So that was it. He wanted to avoid having Noiz waiting for him as much as he could because he wasn’t very fond of unpunctuality himself. He knew Noiz wouldn’t mind anyway but that wasn’t exactly why he wanted to be on time. He’d missed the chance to bid him a proper farewell this morning; and the last thing he needed was to waste more of their very limited weekend for being late.

The café where they will be meeting up was a prominent place in the city, its outstanding architecture made it hard to miss. As soon as Aoba turned a corner leading to that very place, he could see Noiz sitting outside the shop, flipping through some of his documents with a serious expression on his face. Without wasting more time, he ran straight up to him, panting heavily as he grabbed Noiz on the shoulder.

“I-I’m so s-sorry,” he said, trying to catch his breath at the same time.

“No problem.” Standing up, Noiz pointed his chin at the seat opposite him. “Sit down, I’ve ordered something for you.”

He  _knew_  that Noiz wouldn’t mind but time was crucial for him, even if it was only ten minutes.

Sipping quietly on the caramel milk tea Noiz had ordered for him, he stared as Noiz flipped through more of his documents before he kept all of them away, finally fixing his eyes on his boyfriend. He never had a proper look at Noiz before he left this morning – his mind too groggy to even function – but now that he was wide awake, he noticed that Noiz was in his three-piece suit, properly groomed and his face was… as gorgeous as he remembered it to be. Sometimes he wondered exactly how anyone could stand him. Not only that he had this indifferent air around him that often did nothing but made him appear to be even harder to approach than he already was, but he also had a type of charm that could easily pave ways for more business opportunities. Aoba didn’t even need anyone to tell him that his boyfriend was also a great convincer. If anyone,  _he_ ’d be the person who should know best.

“D-done with work?” Aoba asked, attempting to break the silence between them.

Noiz gave out a hum before he crossed his fingers and smirked at him.

“I’m all yours now.”

Aoba almost choked on his drink. A smooth talker, indeed.

“By the way, are you done?” Noiz said. He was obviously done ages ago while he waited for Aoba but as soon as he asked, Aoba took a mouthful of his drink down his throat and settled the cup on the table.

“Yeah.”

“Let’s go.”

Standing up, Noiz held his hand out at Aoba, who blushed a little before he took it. After months of residing in Germany, he’d realized that public display of affection wasn’t exactly anything too peculiar here, and sometimes he couldn’t help but wonder if this was the reason why Noiz was always so blunt with his actions to begin with.

***

“Looks like it’s gonna rain.”

The moment they stepped out of the shop, they heard a barely audible storm from a distance, immediately causing Aoba to look up at the sky just to realize that dark clouds had formed on top of them.

“Did you bring the umbrella I asked?”

Oh, crap. He was rushing his way out of the house and he totally forgot about what Noiz had asked of him, the matter being the least of his concern.

Noiz did not need his reply to figure out the answer as he continued.

“It’s fine, we can bu—“

But he was two seconds too late. By the time they were in the middle of the street, heavy raindrops started to fall on them and then they were running across the street, under the rain, only stopping when they were under the shelter of a bus station.

They were both soaked wet. Aoba could feel the water dripping down from the top of his head to his toes as he wiped the water off his face with the back of his hand. Talk about bad luck. First, he was late for his appointment with Noiz. Now, they were stuck in the rain, without an umbrella that Noiz had mindfully asked him to bring along.

He felt like cursing himself.

“You okay?”

Noiz obviously noticed the difficult look on his face. When he used his finger to wipe the water off Aoba’s cheek, Aoba jolted slightly before he turned around to smile at him.

“Fine,” he simply mumbled.

He was so distracted with his own frustration that he didn’t notice that Noiz was staring intently at him, a perplexed look gracing his features, and he only turned around to look at his boyfriend again when he noticed the a-moment-too-long silence spread between them.

“W-what?”

“Sexy.”

He couldn’t even understand what Noiz meant by that but he didn’t have time to figure it out anyway because then, Noiz was grasping on his waist, pulling him closer and pressing their drenched bodies together as he gripped on his chin.

“Did you do that on purpose?” Noiz asked, his husky voice too pronounced to tell Aoba where this was leading to.

“Do what on purpose?”

Whatever Noiz wanted to say must be hard to express with words. He was wet, cold, and shivering. But the kiss on his lips was warm, soft, and tantalizing. He was used to Noiz catching him off guard like this but this was probably the first time they had kissed when they were still fully-clothed – albeit wet – under the rain. He could feel droplets of water hitting on his skin. Even though they were sheltered, the wind was evidently too strong to even protect them from the rain. But above all, he could clearly feel Noiz’s furious heartbeats against his chest, and he was sure that he wasn’t any better either.

He was expecting Noiz to go further, to plunge his tongue into his mouth but all Noiz did was licking on his lips, kissing the cold water from his face and wrapping him into a firmer hug that made him feel slightly less cold.

“Cold?”

“Fine.”

When they separated their hug, Noiz’s eyes shifted down to his body again. Aoba was aware of how wet he was, but what he wasn’t aware of was how the choice of his shirt had made every part of his body shape appear more…  _prominent_  than it already was. Thanks to the color of his shirt, Noiz could clearly see his skin beneath the thin material and Aoba didn’t even need him to spell it out to know how greatly turned on he was at that very sight.

“You obviously did that on purpose,” Noiz smirked again, not even trying to hide the slightest of his delight.

“Stop staring.” About to smack Noiz on the head, Aoba stopped when he saw Noiz taking his jacket off. And then, that said jacket was on him, covering most of his body and warming him up effectively.

“I don’t think I want anyone to see how erotic you look like now,” Noiz said, still with the grin on his face.

“But how about you?”

“I’m fine.”

Unfortunately, Aoba wasn’t exactly fine with that idea. The last thing he wanted was for Noiz to fall sick because of  _his_  carelessness but at the same time he also knew that there was no way he could do anything to stop his boyfriend from worrying about him. As they sat on the bench, Aoba intertwined their fingers together as he leaned against Noiz’s arm.

“Let’s make hot soup when we go home later,” he hummed, hearing Noiz’s small chuckle in response.

“That’d have to wait. I have more urgent matters I’d like to attend to first.”

He didn’t even have the strength to retort any further. Noiz’s words had a double meaning to them.

And by now, Aoba had known him well enough to understand exactly what he actually meant, even without the need to spell them out loud.


	22. Small Considerations [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There're small things Aoba often noticed about Noiz - the small scars on his shoulders, the crooked finger, but above all, he was just grateful that Noiz was alive, even more than he was a few weeks ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware of tooth-rotting fluff. Takes place when Noiz is still in the hospital after the Platinum Jail incident.

The fact that Noiz had risked his life protecting Aoba when he had just regained his ability to feel sometimes still scared Aoba immensely.

Not only that he had to endure the tremendous  _pain_  of having a few of his bones crushed, he also had to deal with what came  _after_  – the treatment he had to go through and, inevitably,  _more_  pain.

He could never forget the smile Noiz wore on his face when he hovered over him, when he saw blood trickling down his forehead, and when Noiz ultimately slumped on him, he swore his heart stopped beating for a second.

It never occurred to him, ever. But the thought of  _losing_  Noiz wasn’t something he wanted to consider. However, when he finally put his thoughts into it, probably that incident was necessary after all. Otherwise, they wouldn’t know how much they meant to each other; and of course, they wouldn’t end up like this now.

There were times when he would walk into a room where Noiz was sitting with his Coil screen up but the moment he saw Aoba walk in, he’d closed it, keeping the distraction away; and there were also times when Aoba would walk into a quiet room, where Noiz was still sleeping, an inaudible snore escaping his lips. It was one of the rare times when Aoba noticed how innocent-looking and how…  _young_  Noiz was. There were a lot of things that Aoba never thought of Noiz – he never considered about why he turned out to be the person he was today; why he acted in certain ways; and even why he only ate certain food. These considerations only occurred to him when he delved into the deepest of his thoughts. But even without Scrap, it didn’t matter to Aoba, anyway. What truly mattered was who Noiz was with him now, and he didn’t need to know about his past to define who he really thought Noiz was.

Today, however, he walked into a quiet room, the only sounds being the tickling of the clock on the wall and the quiet snore from Noiz. Carefully closing the door behind him, Aoba sneaked to Noiz’s bedside and settled himself on a chair once he put the packet of food he had brought for him on the bedside table.

This was definitely not the first time he’d seen Noiz asleep like this. Even when they were in Glitter, he’d caught sight of a sleeping Noiz – the first time he did he literally stared at the nineteen-year-old for a few seconds before he looked away awkwardly – and for him, this was the one time that truly showed how precious Noiz was.

Not knowing what else to do besides waiting for Noiz to wake up, Aoba decided to stare at him. Starting from his face, he gazed at the piercings on the bridge of his nose, the ones on his eyebrow, the ones at the bottom of his lips, wondering whether Noiz felt even a slight twinge of pain when he got them. Then, he proceeded to stare at his hair, enduring the temptation to touch it, to feel its softness against his fingertips when the color itself had already told Aoba enough of how refined it’d feel on his skin. If Noiz was awake, he was sure that the brat would give him one of his signature smirk, perhaps even a few of his prominent teases that would drive Aoba up the wall and into a corner. He never disliked any of these, of course. He was just not used to it. Heck, perhaps he would never get used to how upfront Noiz could be.

He had never taken a good look at Noiz’s face before either, their life had been a constant chase and run. But now that he had the time, he couldn’t help but notice how good-looking this brat was. He was only nineteen and he would only become even more gorgeous with time. Truth be told, Aoba wasn’t even sure if he could handle it. It did not only concern his pride, but how exactly does one handle the sight of such an attractive man every day, every moment?

Feeling the heat on his face, Aoba quickly shook his head, attempting to shake the embarrassing thoughts off before his gaze stopped at the bandages on Noiz’s body. Noiz had told him that it didn’t hurt anymore. It was a huge relief. But every time Aoba saw the scars when Noiz changed his bandages, it still reminded him awfully of the time he’d gotten all those scars on himself. The guilt he felt within him wasn’t something he could easily dismiss, before he knew it, he was picking Noiz’s bandaged hand up.

Noiz’s skin felt rough in his. It was somewhat bigger than his, slightly jabbing his pride but it was warm regardless, urging him to press the back of it against his face.

Probably Noiz was cold towards mostly everyone around him because of the fact that he lacked the ability to feel; hence, causing him to not know how to interact with people. Probably that was why Aoba thought that his skin would feel cold as well. But now that he literally felt the warmth against his cheeks, all of those previous contemplations were wiped clean off his mind.

Noiz was warm. He probably wasn’t very expressive, probably wasn’t very good with words, but he was still a young, nineteen-year-old brat who was still growing. And across time, Aoba genuinely hoped that he would see more of the wonders of this world, and that he, as a person, would be as warm as how Aoba was feeling him right now.

Pressing his lips against the back of Noiz’s hand, Aoba allowed the gentle kiss to linger for a while longer before he felt slight  _movements_  from the hand he was holding. Alarmed, he was about to pull it away when the same hand grasped on his, halting his actions.

“So you do that every time I’m asleep?”

Aoba didn’t even need Noiz to point it out to know how red his face was right now. He wasn’t going to deny that he’d been staring at him while Noiz was asleep but he wasn’t going to admit that he’d find him endearing out loud either.

“Sorry. Did I wake you up?” he said, intending to divert the topic.

“I’ve been awake since you walked into the room,” Noiz responded with a smirk.

“Y-you—“

Then, Noiz released Aoba’s hand and instead, raised it to trace on Aoba’s cheekbones, feeling the warmth against his fingertips. And then, before he could figure out what to say, Noiz was sitting up and leaning forward to kiss him on the cheek, effectively causing him to swallow his intended words down his throat.

“Probably I should pretend to be asleep more often. Who knows, I might hear someone spilling out their most inner thoughts.”

He was right, after all. He could never get used to Noiz’s bluntness. But perhaps he could at least  _try_  to figure out a counterattack so that he wouldn’t be gaping at Noiz the way he did now, looking like a complete idiot. But those can wait, they had the time after all. What he can’t wait now, was to return Noiz’s earnest kiss. This time, on the lips.


	23. Mutual Feeling [Koujaku x Noiz]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Halloween and Koujaku had something up his sleeve. But his plan didn't go as well as he planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for Halloween! :)

The first time he met Noiz he thought he looked like a fearless - more like  _immature_  - kid who knew nothing about the world, let alone facing life-threatening situations that’d challenge his beliefs. He guessed to be fair, Noiz was still young, indeed; and there was only so much experience a young kid could gather to truly know how it was like to feel  _scared_.

Zoning out with his beer glass barely touching his lips, he only came back to himself when Mizuki waved a hand in front of him.

"Come back to our world, Koujaku," Mizuki teased, putting out a hand, an indication to refill Koujaku’s beer glass.

But Koujaku put the glass down and shook his hand instead.

"I’m done for the night, thanks," he said, standing up and picking up his sword.

Knowing that whatever he said wouldn’t make it into his ears, Mizuki gave him a bitter smile before he waved at him.

"Oh yeah, you’re helping out tomorrow, right?" 

Stopping in his tracks, Koujaku turned back and looked confusedly at Mizuki. 

"Remind me what’s happening," he finally admitted upon sensing that Mizuki wasn’t going to tell him if he didn’t ask.

Mizuki gave out a soft sigh and shook his head.

"Halloween is the day after tomorrow. I’d need some help to prepare the shop."

"Oh."

He remembered Mizuki mentioning about this a few days back but he’d never deemed it important, not when he had not been part of the celebration for years. 

But now, when the reminder was laid in front of him, his eyes brightened, an idea suddenly occurred to him.

***

He’d never seen Noiz being scared before. Instead of finally acknowledging the fact that he might not be a person who’d get scared easily, Koujaku now had a whole new opinion about this.

Sure, Noiz was definitely fearless - the fact that he hadn’t been able to feel pain for such a long time was definitely a main contributor to this - but that didn’t mean that he  _wasn’t_  able to feel scared. Truth be told, it had been troubling Koujaku for some time. Ever since they’d started their unlabeled relationship, he’d unconsciously taken up the responsibility to show Noiz a different world that - hopefully - would make him more expressive. [He still remembered the time when he made Noiz smile](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1102941/chapters/5223134), when a sudden warmth had penetrated so intensely into his chest he swore he couldn’t feel for at least three seconds; and at that moment of time, he was reminded of how  _endearing_  Noiz could be, that he was just a kid, and he definitely deserved more of this smiles on his face.

That moment could easily be the deciding factor of why he had become so determined to expose Noiz to different types of emotions that would probably help him learn more about his young boyfriend in the process.

And Halloween might be a great opportunity for this. 

A day before Halloween, Noiz had appeared on his doorstep, still with the dispassionate look on his face - probably even a bit of annoyance - Koujaku had come to remember very well. He only started showing a tiny hint of interest when he noticed that Koujaku’s room was unlit, instantly drawing a smirk on his face.

"Heh, you should have just told me," he mumbled, inching towards Koujaku and whispering in his ear.

"Shut it," Koujaku retorted as he grabbed Noiz on the wrist and pulled him into the room. "It’s not what you think it is, brat."

Noiz’s expression was instantaneously replaced with a confused look, making Koujaku feel a bit more uplifted seeing how he’d managed to surprise Noiz for once. As he settled both of them in front of the television, Noiz finally asked.

"What’s this all about?"

"You know what’s happening tomorrow?"

Noiz merely hummed.

"It’s Halloween," Koujaku continued, assuming that Noiz wasn’t aware of it. "And do you know what we do during Halloweens?"

Noiz hummed again, now shifting his eyes to the television screen.

"We watch horror movies," Koujaku said, his voice dropped into a whisper, an attempt to sound mysterious.

This time, Noiz gave out a smirk, which had Koujaku turned and stared at him.

"You sure?" he said, his eyes clearly pronouncing a hint of tease.

"O-of course!" Koujaku responded almost instantly. What is this brat implying anyway? He wouldn’t ask him to come over if he wasn’t sure.

Then, Noiz leaned his back against the couch, making himself comfortable before he continued.

"Well then."

Decided to ignore what else Noiz had on his sleeve, Koujaku pressed on the play button as silence fell between them.

***

An hour into the movie, Koujaku spent the entire time observing Noiz’s reaction. Noiz did nothing but munching on the bowl of caramel popcorn that Koujaku had introduced him (that had him commented a simple “sweet”). For the whole time, there wasn’t any apparent expression on his face, let alone fear. But it didn’t worry Koujaku anyway. It was just the opening scenes, nothing too terrifying. 

In the second hour, Koujaku had stopped giving Noiz too much sideway stare, being finally immersed in the story. His eyes were fixed on the screen, his fingers trembled slightly as he grasped onto the cloth material of his couch when eerie music started playing; constantly swallowing down his throat to contain the loud beating of his heart in his ears, he struggled between closing his eyes and continued watching, the curiosity within him not something he could easily deal with.

"Say."

Noiz’s voice almost made him jump. Turning around to look at Noiz, he saw Noiz still having his eyes glued on the television screen. But he had stopped eating, the bowl now abandoned and he was hugging a pillow instead. 

"W-what?" Koujaku asked, embarrassment washing over him upon realizing how timid his voice sounded. 

"When is the thing gonna appear?" 

Noiz’s voice was still emotionless and it was so quiet that Koujaku had to strain his ears to listen properly. But upon hearing the question, he felt his heart sink a little, realizing that instead of scaring Noiz  _he_  was the one who was more terrified now.

"I-I don’t know," he admitted, shifting his attention back to the screen. "Why do you ask?"

"Because…"

Noiz didn’t manage to finish what he intended to say before a sudden white figure appeared on the screen and  _Koujaku swore he heard a small yelp from him_  before he was overwhelmed by his own fear.

The moment everything calmed down, he turned around again to look at Noiz, expecting another expressionless face. But what he saw immediately made him drop his jaw.

Noiz was covering half of his face with the pillow, to the extent that only his striking lime green eyes were visible in the dark. He was right. He  _did_  hear a yelp from Noiz earlier.

"You’re so loud." He heard Noiz’s muffled voice from behind the pillow.

Usually, he’d have his own retort about Noiz’s criticism towards him; but now, he found himself wrapping Noiz, along with the pillow into his arms, smiling gleefully at how  _cute_ Noiz tended to be as he saw a pout making its way onto his boyfriend’s face from the corner of his eye.

He might have ridiculed himself by giving out such a huge reaction, totally defeating the purpose of him asking Noiz to stop by. But he didn’t lose completely, anyway. 

Because he’d managed to capture that small hint of emotion from Noiz that he’d never get to see. And that was more than enough.

Really. That really was.


	24. Heat [Koujaku x Noiz]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes small things worried Koujaku, but it's not the same with Noiz.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Passionate KouNoi is the essence of their relationship. Slightly NSFW.

The moment he saw Noiz sprawled out on the bed, he instantly knew the brat had been overworking himself again. It was no longer unusual to find Noiz in his house every once a while now. But it was never something he’d expect anyway. Noiz’s behaviors had always been unpredictable. Sometimes, when Koujaku was expecting him to drop by, he’d find himself being unable to locate him for a few days; and sometimes, when he never expected Noiz to show up, he’d return to a pair of shoes which he was already more than familiar with in front of his doorstep. 

Noiz was never predictable, and Koujaku had yet to understand everything of him. But yet, whenever he saw the slim body frame sitting - or rather, like now - sprawling out on his bed, he found the corners of his lips curved slightly higher, a sign that told him that he’d be home at the right time.

He’d never wanted to control whatever Noiz wanted to do; but he’d never wanted to lose sight of him either.

As he sat beside him, on the bed, he was stripping himself off his clothing when he felt Noiz moving in his sleep.

”..’ning,” Noiz mumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes at the same time.

"Sorry, woke you up?" Koujaku smiled as he reached out to ruffle Noiz’s hair.

As Koujaku returned to getting rid of his clothes, Noiz crept up from behind him and settled his chin on the older man’s shoulder.

"What’re you doing?" he asked. He  _knew_  what Koujaku was doing, but the husky voice he was using suggested something else from what Koujaku was expecting.

"I’m going for a shower," Koujaku said, throwing his kimono to the edge of his bed before he turned around to look sideways at Noiz. "How about you come shower with me?"

Noiz’s eyes brightened, but only for a while. A few seconds later, his expression returned to the usual mischievous-looking one Koujaku had memorized so well as he let out a smirk.

"I’m not implying anything, brat," Koujaku scowled as he flipped a finger against Noiz’s forehead. "I’m sure you haven’t been showering yourself before you fell asleep."

Noiz fell silent for a while, then he moved away from Koujaku and started stripping off his own clothing instead. 

"I did. But I don’t mind taking another shower if it’s with you."

The heat rise to Koujaku’s face almost immediately but before he could come out with another retort, Noiz had made his way into the bathroom, now completely naked.

***

Noiz was already under the shower, hot water running down his head to his toes when Koujaku finally stepped into the bathroom. Giving out a sigh, he made quick steps towards him and turned the shower off. 

"What?" Noiz asked, visibly unsatisfied with the way he was interrupted.

"I told you not to use this. The water is too hot for you," Koujaku lectured, now eyeing on the red patches on Noiz’s skin. 

"Sorry, can’t tell."

Ever since Koujaku had found out that Noiz had problems with  _feeling_  anything at all, he’d started taking care of everything Noiz did in an unintentional way. Noiz certainly had his own reservations towards this sudden attention, but at the same time, he also knew that nothing he said or did would change Koujaku’s mind. Across time, he simply allowed him to be. 

And this was one of the many things Koujaku had reminded him over and over again, although he’d decided to forget about it now that his head was occupied with something else which he deemed far more important than burning his own skin.

"It… doesn’t hurt, right?" 

Koujaku was still staring at the patches on Noiz’s skin when Noiz turned around to face him. Then, he felt Koujaku’s hand against his chest, slowly and carefully rubbing on the red spots. 

"No, I can’t feel it at all," he responded, his voice incredibly louder than he remembered it to be; echoing in the bathroom now extremely quiet without the sounds of shower from before.

Clicking his tongue, Koujaku continued caressing his chest without any further comments. Noiz knew that Koujaku had something in his mind and he was obviously unwilling to share with him - at least not yet - but no matter what it was, he also knew that it was probably something that would once again create unnecessary worries for the older man.

That was the last thing he needed. He didn’t need anyone to pity his condition. When he became more mature across time, he realized how his condition was far from normal and that there was nothing he could do to make it better. But there was no use whining over it anyway. It wasn’t as if it was going to give him more troubles. All he needed to do was to be more careful with his surroundings than everyone else and simply to live with it.

That was also why when he saw the scowl in between Koujaku’s eyebrow, he clicked his tongue, visibly annoyed, before he brushed Koujaku’s hand away from this chest.

"I’m fine. It’ll be gone soon anyway," he said before turning his back towards Koujaku and walking away to fill the bathtub with water.

"You know that’s not why I’m concerned," Koujaku said. Noiz could hear Koujaku’s footsteps behind him and he knew that Koujaku was still having his eyes on his body.

Then, he heard another sigh.

"Another one."

He didn’t need to ask Koujaku what he meant by that either to know what Koujaku was referring to. Straightening himself up, he leaned against the wall, acting as if he was waiting for the bathtub to be filled up as momentary silence spread between them.

"I know it doesn’t hurt but that doesn’t mean you can treat it carelessly, you know."

 _Not again_.

Purposely ignoring Koujaku, Noiz closed his eyes, pretending as if he didn’t hear anything until he literally  _felt_  Koujaku standing right in front of him. When he opened his eyes, Koujaku - still with that scowl on his face - was giving him a feverish stare that had him frowning back at him.

"What?"

"Are you listening to me?"

"I am. Even if I’m not, it’s the same thing all over again anyway."

"If you actually  _listen_ , then I wouldn’t need to say it over and over again.”

Without any intention to continue this conversation, Noiz looked away, telling Koujaku in a nonverbal way that he wasn’t interested to dwell with the topic any further. But soon, Koujaku pressed one of his hands beside Noiz’s head, another one reaching out to grasp on Noiz’s chin as he lifted it up to force Noiz to look at him.

"Listen, brat, it’s not a matter of you care or don’t anymore." Koujaku was almost growling but all Noiz did was stare at him without any hint of expression on his face. "If you keep hurting yourself like that—"

"I know," Noiz interrupted. Koujaku was so near to him now their chests were literally only inches apart from each other. "But sometimes I can’t help it. I can’t even tell when I get hurt."

That effectively shut Koujaku up. As his grip on Noiz’s chin softened, Noiz placed his hand against Koujaku’s chest instead, directly on the black ink - the scar - that Koujaku was so self-conscious of. He could feel Koujaku’s heartbeat sped up, feel Koujaku trembled slightly under his touch but yet, Koujaku was still locking his gaze on Noiz, as if turning away now would lead them to something both of them feared.

"I thought you’d know it better than anyone else," Noiz continued, his voice dropped into a silent whisper. As Koujaku released his grip, Noiz, sensing a chance, leaned forward to kiss him on the lips. The kiss started unhurriedly, with them merely pressing their lips together and feeling each other’s breath on their faces; but as Noiz wrapped his arms around Koujaku’s torso, Koujaku hitched a breath before he returned Noiz’s embrace with a firm one of his own. Hugging on Noiz’s head, he pushed harder against Noiz’s lips, sucking on one of them so hard he could hear Noiz giving out a small gasp that went straight into his mouth.

Noiz couldn’t feel heat - not from the water, not even from Koujaku - but one thing Koujaku was sure was that Noiz could definitely feel how passionate he was towards him - how much he  _wanted_  him. It always hurt him to see more scars on Noiz’s body, no matter if they were caused intentionally or not. At first, he thought that it was just his protectiveness doing the talking; but soon, he realized it was more than that. 

It wasn’t merely his protectiveness that was controlling his nerves any more. It was also his  _possessiveness_. 

He didn’t want anyone else to leave such visible marks on Noiz. He didn’t want anyone else to have the power to do that. He wanted to own that exclusive privilege.

That realization ignited a new sense of  _want_  in him as he pushed his tongue into Noiz’s mouth, immediately feeling the metal material that was Noiz’s tongue piercing against it as he proceeded to suck on both Noiz’s tongue  _and_  his piercing. At that very moment, all he wanted was to feel Noiz, for Noiz to feel him, and he wanted this feverish passion - this unstoppable heat - to be contagious so that it would at least reach Noiz in the heart. 

So that Noiz could, at least, understand a bit of how good it actually felt to be wanted like this.

It didn’t matter if Noiz couldn’t feel heat; it didn’t even matter if Noiz couldn’t feel  _anything_  at all.

Because he was here for him. And if he was supposed to take this responsibility to  _make_ Noiz feel it, no matter what the cost would be, he would take it. Because Noiz had accepted both him and his scars - his inabilities, his weaknesses.

And Koujaku would do the same for him. Just like how Noiz did.


	25. Warmth in Your Hands [Clear x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clear has his insecurity but Aoba is there to comfort him. He's always been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is. This is the ficlet that broke my CleAo virginity. I apologize in advance for any mis-characterization.

Before Aoba got to know  _more_  about Clear, he had always thought that Clear was warm - the bright smile he’d wear on his face, his hyperactive personality, and the contagious atmosphere he tended to bring around him, often painting sunlights to his surrounding and effectively enlightened the mood around them.

When Aoba was pressured by things he might or might not know, he thought that having Clear around was a bliss. Sure, he’d be naive, sometimes immature even but when he came to think about it, perhaps that was what he needed at that moment of time. He didn’t need more reassurance and threats to know what kind of situation he’d landed himself in. And no matter how strong a person was to be, there would come a time when one needed to take a break, to slow down their pace and to simply indulge in a state of peace that would pull them away from reality, even temporarily.

Clear could do that. He was a natural with that.

That was why Aoba thought that he was warm. His smile was warm, the way he looked at him was warm, even his voice… heck, his entire existence was warm.

No matter how many more impressions he’d gained about the happy man, there was nothing that could delete that very first impression he had towards Clear. It was as if Clear was a personification of the sun, and perhaps that was why he was so warm.

But Clear seemed to have his own set of opinions towards himself. The first time Aoba told him about what he thought about him, he looked away, momentarily distracted before he turned back and flashed a huge grin at him, instantly telling Aoba that he had reserved his comments. The second time, the third, and the times that followed, he did it again.

"You’re so warm," Aoba said one day after dinner, while they were hanging out in his room. As expected, Clear was about to turn away but Aoba was faster as he grabbed onto the other’s hand, taking it up and placing the back of his hand against his cheek. "I could feel your warmth so clearly."

Clear could only stare at Aoba, completely transfixed with a lost of words. He knew that Aoba was sincere and he meant what he said but truth be told, he could never understand what Aoba truly meant by that, and what was the implication towards such an expression.

Regardless of his own confusion, he gave Aoba a tender smile, grasping Aoba’s hand harder in his and responded.

"Thank you, Aoba-san. I say the same to you."

Mirroring Clear’s smile, Aoba shifted closer to him and leaned against him. Clear hesitated for mere seconds before he encircled Aoba into a hug.

"You’re warm, Aoba-san," he mumbled, feeling Aoba’s warmth and feeling his heartbeats against his skin when he hugged him a bit firmer. "You are so much warmer than me."

Then, he saw Aoba looking over his shoulder to send him a pout, instantly confusing him.

"A-Aoba-san?" he asked frantically, about to release his grasp on the smaller man when Aoba pulled him back.

"Listen," Aoba said, sternness evident in his tone as he cupped Clear’s face. "Stop denying what I told you. You are  _warm_. So what if you can’t age? So what if you can’t bleed? None of those matter, Clear, because you’re perfectly  _human_. And as a  _human_ , you could  _feel_ , you have your own emotions and you lo—” Suddenly leaving his words hanging in midair, Aoba blushed while Clear stared, stunned, at him. Then, a frown appearing in between his eyebrows, he quickly looked away, coughing loudly before he continued. “…and you l-love me right? That’s more than enough to make you warm.”

His voice turned smaller towards the end. Still refusing to look Clear in the eye, he could clearly feel the other man’s gaze on him, as if it was searing deep into his soul and making him tingle in warmth.

How dare this senseless person said that he wasn’t warm when he was making  _him_  feel so warm?

Then, he felt Clear’s hand on his, entwining their fingers together as he leaned his head against Aoba’s shoulder.

"I’m warm only because of you, Aoba-san. You were the one who told me how to feel this warm. But Aoba-san, I actually think of it differently."

As Aoba shot him a curious look, Clear sat up, bringing their faces closer and pecking Aoba on the cheek.

"I thought it was called happiness. But I’m fine if it’s called warmth too."

He had to swallow hard to stop himself from gasping out loud. Then, he gave Clear a gentle smile.

"No, you’re right. That’s a better way to call it."

But both of them knew that the warmth they were feeling now, both internally and externally, was stemmed from happiness. And that it was the best proof of them being so very much alive. At least at this moment, this minute, this second, they were still feeling each other’s warmth. And they believed that they’d continue feeling it, because they’d live in each other’s heart, even after there comes a time when they had no choice but to separate. Physically.


	26. One Day Before; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A small thought about the night before Noiz and Aoba's wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to get rid of writer’s block and constantly being frustrated because my writing isn’t up to my usual standard anymore :( Anyway, something I vomited out of impulse. Could be read as the night before they got married ayy.

The day before their wedding, Noiz went into a state of denial. He spent hours sitting on the bed, staring at pictures after pictures from their photo album until Aoba joined him under the sheets. Instinctively, he wrapped a hand around his body as Aoba nuzzled his way up his torso and ultimately rested his head in the crook of Noiz’s neck.

  
“What are you looking at?” he asked, trying to peek at the photo album in Noiz’s hands before Noiz closed it and put it on their bedside table.  
  
“Nothing.”  
  
He knew Aoba was pouting at him; but he also knew that Aoba’s condition wasn’t any better than him either. He could feel his rapid heartbeats when they pressed their chests together; and when Aoba hugged him with both his arms, he swore he could feel him trembling.  
  
“It’s finally tomorrow, huh?” Aoba started, breaking the silence in the room while Noiz caressed his head, playing with the tips of his hair as he stared blankly in front of him. “I can’t believe it.”  
  
“Me too.”  
  
Noiz wasn’t a man with many words, that trait even more pronounced at this very moment. He was still trapped in a state of surrealism, unable to properly make sense of what he’d landed himself into, let alone accepting the reality that he was going to marry the person who meant the world to him tomorrow, or more precisely, in a few hours’ time.  
  
It reminded him of the time when he decided to propose to Aoba - when he’d chose the best rings he could find in town and when he finally did The Thing… He would never forget Aoba’s face before he felt the latter’s weight on him, screaming his name and telling him how stupid he was to keep things hidden from him like this. It was one of those memories that he hoped he’d capture; it was one memory that he wanted to revisit again and again.  
  
“But I’m glad, Noiz,” Aoba said, again breaking the tension between them. “I’m glad it’s happening. I’m glad you made the move. I’m glad I agreed to follow you. Noiz, I…”  
  
Aoba stuttered at the end of his words, seemingly unable to properly express what he really wanted to say. But Noiz knew him too well to realize what exactly that was stuck in his throat. Lifting Aoba’s chin with two of his fingers so that Aoba was now staring straight into his eyes, Noiz smiled -instantly took Aoba’s breath away - as he leaned in to kiss Aoba on the forehead. It was one of Noiz’s favourite gestures that had always managed to draw a small gape out of Aoba. It was since their confession in the hospital that Noiz had started picking up all these little actions - when he would teasingly scratch on Aoba’s ears just to make him jump; or when he would kiss his forehead, just like how Aoba did to him, with so much tenderness and passion that Aoba swore his heart stopped beating for at least two seconds. It was all these little gestures that had often told Aoba how much Noiz loved him, and how much he wanted to know more about him.  
  
“Thank you for not giving up on me,” Noiz muttered, his voice husky and filled with so much passion Aoba could feel the heat rising to his face the moment he heard his fiancé’s voice. Then, as soon as Noiz finished his words, he pulled him closer and kissed him on the nose before he continued. “Thank you for agreeing to follow me here.” Another kiss on the cheek. “And thank you for giving me the yes to make you mine.”  
  
This time, the kiss wasn’t soft and gentle; instead, it was heated, passionate, hard, and even slightly sloppy. But it wasn’t the kiss that had almost drew the tears out of Aoba - he promised that he wouldn’t cry until they recite their vow - it was how real Noiz was now, and how sincerely happy Noiz was to have him by his side.  
  
He never knew what was waiting for him when he agreed to travel 5000km away from home to a foreign country. But it didn’t matter. None of those mattered anymore. Because all he ever needed was to have Noiz by his side, to witness their growth, and to bring the world Noiz deserved to him.

 


	27. Warmth; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba and Noiz celebrated winter together, with snow and hot chocolate, but most importantly, each other's warmth <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A fluffy quick write written for [Fran](http://thegreentomyblue.tumblr.com), who's not only a sweet friend, but also one of the most talented artists I've come to know <3

”..choo!”

“Are you okay?”

He wasn’t unfamiliar with winter. When he was younger, barely familiar to the world, he used to spend his time here, outside the blanket of white with his brother. Sometimes his parents would tag along, but most of the times they’d find themselves being accompanied by either maids or butlers as they minded their own business, completely indulged in their own perfect world. He never understood what ‘cold’ meant. When he saw his brother sneezed, he thought his brother was just too prone to the chills and he’d give him his scarf, wiped his dripping nose with his white handkerchief while he wrapped him firmly in his hug.

For some reason, he never knew how ‘cold’ felt like.

For some reason, he didn’t understand how it felt to have his feet frozen and buried deep in the snow.

He never knew why his mom would run to him, worries plastered all over her face as she wrapped him with her own scarf just like how he did to his brother.

He thought he was stronger than others. Because he could never  _feel_  what others felt - pain, cold, hot. He couldn’t understand what those painful expressions on others meant.

Until the truth finally hit him.

“I’m fine,” he responded as he replied Aoba’s scowl with a smile.

“Seriously…” Aoba’s smile gradually turned into a pout as he unwrapped his own sky blue scarf and wrapped it around Noiz’s neck. “Told you to bring an extra scarf.”

He only returned Aoba’s kind gesture with a firmer grasp on his hand.

“Aren’t you cold too?” he asked instead as they made their way down the German street, heading back to their house.

“Not as cold as you,” Aoba said without looking at him.

“But you’re cold, right?” Noiz persisted.

When Aoba never answered, Noiz chuckled and pulled his scarf off and wrapped both of their necks together.

“H-hey, Noiz! We’re at—”

“Now both of us are no longer cold.”

Aoba laughed. Then, he reached up to pinch Noiz on the nose.

“Brat. Ah.” He was about to pull on Noiz’s beanie when he halted. “It’s snowing.”

The snow was no longer something new to Aoba. Two years in Germany had earned him two times of snowing experiences. Noiz would never forget his face when he first saw it. It was a mix of happiness and excitement - an expression Noiz felt intensely gratifying to see from Aoba.

Looking up, he felt the tiny droplets of snow dropping on his face, creating an electrifying sense of chill on his skin. Even this chill was gratifying. He no longer remembered how it used to not feel this, his past memories were in a state of haze. Before he could wipe the wetness off his face, he felt a different -  _warmer_  - sensation on his face and turning around just to see Aoba wiping the water off his face with his fingertips.

“If you’re not careful, people will think that you’re crying. And what’s with that face?”

He must’ve accidentally portrayed an expression that could be misinterpreted as being sober.

“Nothing.”

“Hmm..” In any case, Aoba decided to drop his question as he took Noiz’s hand in his and urged him to continue walking.

“It’s getting really cold. Let’s go home before we get stuck in the snow.”

He couldn’t remember how it once felt to be unable to feel warm as well.

As they sat by their fireplace, both cuddling under the blanket with two cups of hot cocoa in their hands, Noiz wondered how exactly did he manage to experience a contrast of two sensations in such a short period of time. The tingling chilliness still pricked his skin but now, the warmth enveloping him was endearingly heartwarming, causing him to go into a state of surrealism as he stared at the half-drank hot cocoa in his hands.

“What are you thinking about?” Aoba asked, drowning down the last of his drink and moving closer to Noiz so that he could practically lean against him.

“Warm.”

“Hmm? Is it too hot?”

Noiz shook his head. Finishing his drink, he placed the cup beside him and wrapped his arm around Aoba, pulling him closer until there was literally no space in between them.

“What’s wrong, Noiz?” Noticing the heaviness of Noiz’s thoughts, Aoba urged as he returned Noiz’s hug, allowing Noiz to turn him over so that he was laying on the floor.

“It’s amazing,” Noiz started slowly. Tracing his fingertips against Aoba’s cheekbone, he smiled as he stared as the sparks from their fireplace reflected in Aoba’s eyes. “It was so cold this morning but now it’s hot.”

“Well, that’s because we were outside this morning but now you’re inside,” Aoba responded with a smile, grabbing onto Noiz’s hand in the process as he pressed his palm against his face.

“I know,” Noiz said. “It’s amazing.”

It didn’t need Aoba too long to understand what Noiz was trying to say. Pressing his lips against Noiz’s palm, he responded.

“It’s amazing, indeed. To see you able to experience all these sensations and the memories that come with it.”

Noiz was completely caught off guard as his eyes brightened before his smile deepened.

“And it’s all thanks to you,” he whispered hotly as he pressed his lips against Aoba’s for brief seconds before he pulled off. “You’re warm.”

Then, they were caught in a kiss, which started slow and eventually, their tongues were pressing against each other, their soft moans accompanied by the cracking of the fireplace in their living room.

“You’re warm.”

“You said that already,” Aoba chuckled. But before he could continue what he wanted to say, Noiz was leaning closer, biting him on his lower lip and sucking on him as he proceeded to kiss on his neck.

“N-Noiz.." 

Sometimes he’d find himself caught in Noiz’s sudden fervor and all he could do was clinging onto him, returning his passion with the same amount of want he had towards him and before he knew it, he’d find himself yearning more, and more from his boyfriend.

"You want to do it here? Or on the bed?” Noiz asked with a mischievous smirk, instantly painting a layer of pink on Aoba’s face as Aoba pulled him closer to bite on his lip.

“You pushed me down here. Finish up what you started.”

It was hot; the room temperature was obviously increasing. But the surrounding was the least of his concern now as he licked the sweat off Aoba’s neck, sucking on the spot where he knew was the most sensitive hard enough to leave a mark. When Aoba moaned a quiet ‘Noiz…’ at him, he felt it - warmth wasn’t only a physical sensation, but it could also hit you emotionally and mentally, because there was no way he could explain the tight spasm of  _warmth_  that was rushing all over his insides when Aoba clutched him so hard on his back and leaving him with more marks before he entered him. 

He didn’t deem sensations as anything important. He once thought they were useless, unnecessary, and they would only disrupt his life. But now, he wouldn’t want to feel them any other way.

Aoba had taught him these. Aoba was the one who told him how to feel so warm inside out from merely existing.

Was it possible for someone to die of happiness? Sometimes he wondered. Was 'happiness’ a type of sensation as well?

Or perhaps, could Aoba be his own definition for his happiness instead?

There were many questions about sensations in his head. He couldn’t be sure if all of them would be answered. But for now, he knew that Aoba was the one who had made this possible, and he’d like to return the favor, as much as how Aoba was now giving him all these feelings and sensations in such a selfless way. 

And he never wanted to return to the coldness of his own solidarity ever again.

 


	28. Routine; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick daily write of domestic NoiAo, a continuation/extension from a specific scene from NoiAo drama CD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [this cute artwork](http://keepcalmkeepdrawing.tumblr.com/post/108716973789/probably-extremely-cheesy-and-overused-but-aoba) by Fran from a prompt I requested so I’m returning the gift to her because she’s a great friend and an awesome artist uvu

“Sorry, I don’t have time to eat.”

To say that he wasn’t taken back at all was a huge lie. One of the main reasons why living together with Noiz seemed to be an exciting idea was due to the fact that he could finally, properly take care of this underfed brat. The mere thought made him happy and he’d spent hours considering what kind of breakfast he could prepare for Noiz just so he could contribute in making his challenge-filled day a little bit better.

 

He could literally feel his heart drop the moment he knew that his effort turned out to be another one-sided wish. But it wasn’t Noiz’s fault and he knew that. He also knew that Noiz was working hard for both of them and that he shouldn’t and have no rights to interfere with what his young, determined boyfriend wanted to achieve.

Sensing the awkward look on Aoba’s face, Noiz straightened his tie and walked towards Aoba, taking Aoba into a surprise hug before he kissed him on the cheek.

“I’ll be back for dinner. Wait for me,” he muttered, planting another kiss on Aoba’s forehead before he released him.

“Okay,” Aoba responded, only came back to his senses two seconds after the kiss. “Ah, Noiz.”

Noiz halted at the door, one hand on the doorknob before he turned around to look at Aoba just to see Aoba rushing towards him.

“Be careful and have a good day at work.”

Little did Aoba know that the farewell kiss he gave Noiz on his lips was more than enough to help him go through the tough day ahead.

 

* * *

 

“Hmmm…”

“What’s wrong? Something bothering you?”

Aoba was laying on Noiz’s lap as they lazed around on the couch after dinner. As soon as he heard Noiz calling out to him, he kept away all the hologram screens he had been screening through to look up at Noiz’s face.

“Did you eat properly today?” he asked while Noiz offed his own Coil.

“I ate lunch,” Noiz said dismissively as he brushed his fingers through Aoba’s hair and untangled the strands of it.

“Breakfast?”

“… I didn’t have time for that.”

Aoba sat up almost immediately, settling himself in between Noiz’s legs and scowled at him.

“Breakfast is important, you know.”

“So is work.”

Aoba pouted.

“If you don’t eat properly, you wouldn’t be able to work efficiently for the rest of the day.”

Aoba was obviously not ready to surrender his case and that quick retort drew a grin out of Noiz as he wrapped his hands around Aoba’s waist and pulled him closer.

“And your point is, mom?” His voice dropped one tone lower, instantly blanketing Aoba with shivers as he swallowed down his throat, pushing Noiz away and scowled deeper at him.

“I’m thinking if I should start preparing breakfast for you every morning now.” When Noiz raised a curious eyebrow, he quickly continued. “I mean, even if you don’t have the time to eat, perhaps I could pack it up and you could then bring it to work or something.”

“Hmm,” Noiz tilted his head slightly, eyes darting to stare at the ceiling before he shifted his gaze back to Aoba’s curious ones. “That’s not too bad of an idea.”

“You’re okay with that?” Aoba responded with a bright smile.

“I don’t really have any issue with you wanting to do what you want,” Noiz said casually, and as if Aoba’s smile was contagious, Noiz’s smile widened as he pulled Aoba over to kiss him. “As long as it’s not too much of a trouble.”

Aoba wanted to say that he never thought of it as being troublesome but Noiz obviously had something else in plan and before he knew it, the list of food that he once had in his thoughts was replaced by a sense of want that he knew was triggered by Noiz’s feverish kiss.

Ever since that day, Noiz would constantly wake up to the smell of cooked food from the kitchen, triggering noisy growls from his stomach as he walked into the dining area just to see Aoba putting bacon and pancake into a plastic container.

“What’s that?” he asked.

“Oh, you’re awake!” Aoba greeted with a bright smile. “Good morning!”

“M’nin.”

“Here you go,” Aoba said as he sealed the container and pushed it into Noiz’s hands. “Your breakfast.”

“That’s the reason why you set your alarm at 6.00 a.m. in the morning?” Noiz returned his grin with a gentle smile of his own. “How long did you take to make this?” Before he waited for an answer, he looked at the wall clock and gave out another smirk. “Two hours?”

“I’m not familiar with Western dishes and I think I deserve a praise for even managed to serve you a decent-looking breakfast.” Aoba pouted.

“I appreciate that,” Noiz said, carefully putting the plastic container on the table before he proceeded to wipe the sweat off Aoba’s forehead with his handkerchief. “Even if it’s not decent-looking, I’ll still eat all of them.”

“Such a sweet talker.” Aoba could feel the heat on his face but he decided to look away at the same time Noiz leaned forward, grabbing the container instead and stuffing it back into Noiz’s hands. “I thought you’re supposed to be in the office an hour earlier today? You’re going to be late.”

Noiz gave out an amused smile, keeping his handkerchief away and this time, he grabbed onto Aoba’s wrist before he could escape again and successfully kissing him on his cheek.

“I’ll be going off then,” he said. “Thanks for the breakfast. I’ll be home for dinner.”

“I’ll be waiting,” Aoba interrupted with a faint tint of pink on his face.

As soon as Noiz left the space, he gave out a loud sigh, wiping the sweat off his forehead and untying his ponytail before he sat on the couch to catch his breath.

It felt surreal. He was the one who had initiated the idea but, like what he’d told Noiz, all that he was doing for Noiz and for this small family they had built made him feel as if they were living together like a pair of newlywed. And when he felt how warm it made him feel inside him, he realized that he didn’t mind it after all, just like how Noiz had put it.

At instances when Noiz actually had time to sit down and eat his food, he’d stare long enough until Aoba started feeling all self-conscious before he finally took the first bite. It made Aoba wonder if this was what he always did before he ate and it was surprisingly embarrassing. Sometimes though, Noiz would wait long enough until Aoba joined him on the table, then he’d shifted his attention from the food to Aoba and gave him a mischievous smirk. Aoba didn’t need him to word what he wanted as he sighed softly.

“You’ll never grow,” Aoba complained as he picked the tamago up with a pair of chopsticks. “I wonder what would people think of you, a  _great_  Vice President of a  _great_ company, to have his boyfriend feeding him like a small kid every time he gets the chance?”

“Let them see,” Noiz said. His mouth was already hanging open, all ready to take in the food Aoba was about to feed him before he paused the intention to reply to Aoba. “It doesn’t matter anyway. The food tastes different when you feed me.”

“Really?” Now that was a new discovery. Aoba was about to consider what Noiz said but Noiz was opening his mouth again, staring at Aoba expectantly and Aoba can’t help but give out a chuckle.

“You’re seriously like a brat,” Aoba said. “Come on.”

He pushed the food into Noiz’s mouth, letting the chopsticks stay in his mouth for a few moments until Noiz started biting on his tamago.

“How is it?” he asked.

“Sweet.”

“Ah, I should probably lessen the sweet sauce next time.”

“It’s nothing bad,” Noiz commented after swallowing the food down. “And about what you said before.”

“Hm? Which one?”

Noiz was giving him the same smirk again and Aoba had a bad feeling that he was about to blurt out something embarrassing once again.

“I don’t mind being a brat if that means you’re going to take care of me like how you’re doing it now.”

He knew it. Giving out a bitter smile, Aoba sighed and ruffled Noiz on the hair, drawing a small scowl out of Noiz before he grinned gleefully at his young boyfriend.

“Bad news, kiddo, I think you’re going to stay as a brat for a long time then.”

“That’s not a bad idea.”

Sometimes, it warmed his heart when he considered the fact that no matter how much Noiz had grown, how much more he would grow, and no matter how mature he looked from the outside, Noiz was still this nineteen-year-old brat he’d met in Midorijima – that naïve child that had yet to learn how to be perfectly independent.

And Aoba would never regret his decision to follow him here just because he knew that he’d need to take care of this very brat, witness his growth, and as time goes by, he also knew that he’d get his own fair chance to be a brat to  _this_  brat as well.

It would probably happen tomorrow, day after tomorrow, maybe a year later, or five years later. It didn’t matter after all. Because he knew that they’d share a fair amount of naivety with each other now and he, surprisingly, was more than okay with that idea.

 


	29. Daze; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Domestic, sleepy NoiAo :)

Aoba woke up in the middle of the night, sleepy and extremely groggy as he took heavy footsteps towards the bathroom. His surrounding was quiet; he only took a quick half-lidded glance at Noiz’s room – which was tightly closed and with no sound at all from behind the door – before he continued his way down the corridor. He only managed to open his eyes when he on the switch, the blinding lights almost gave him a headache.

Yawning, he scratched his head, quickly did his business, almost fell asleep before he snapped himself awake and left the bathroom. There was nothing in his head besides the ‘I want to sleep’ voice that even sounded sleepy in his own mind.

He slumped on the bed and immediately fell asleep the moment he was wrapped in the comfortable silky material of the bed sheet.

Nothing else mattered besides a good night sleep now. Nothing but…

 

When he woke up again, he was once again attacked by faint lights that drew an instant scowl on his face. He was about to use one hand to block the lights from view when he realized that  _something else_  was preventing him from doing so – and that  _something else_  was heavy and, undoubtedly, warm. He blinked once, then twice, and it took a few more blinks to make sense of what was happening around him as he turned around, almost gasped out loud when he finally noticed exactly what was putting weight on him all this while.

“Noiz,” he whispered to a sleeping Noiz. “What are you doing here?”

Noiz didn’t respond. Instead, he merely shifted slightly, with no intention to move his hand away from Aoba as he pulled him closer and hugged him firmer as if Aoba was his bolster.

“Noiz,” Aoba tried calling again, but then, another quiet snore he heard from Noiz told him that Noiz was still fast asleep and that only meant that it was far too early for him to be awake, considering how punctual Noiz could be with his time management.

There was nothing else he could do. With their chests pressed firmly against each other, Aoba could clearly feel the rise and drop of his boyfriend’s chest, his peaceful and quiet snore tickled his face as he smiled, cuddled closer into Noiz’s embrace and laid his head in the crook of Noiz’s neck. Before he knew it, all he could smell was Noiz’s nice scent and all he remembered was Noiz’s warmth before sleep attacked him again.

When Noiz woke up, he was pleasantly surprised to find Aoba sleeping in his embrace. It was 6.30 a.m. in the morning and the sky was starting to become brighter with every passing second. He wanted to move but soon realized that Aoba’s head was on his hand and the numb sensation he felt told him that he’d been sleeping on him for quite some time now. He turned slightly to catch a glimpse of the cube-shaped table clock he’d put on his bedside table. It was still early and it was a weekend so instead of his initial plan to wake Aoba up, he wrapped his free hand around Aoba’s waist, gave him a quick kiss on the forehead – in which Aoba moved slightly without waking up – and spent the next half an hour staring at his face.

It was the sound of the alarm clock that had finally woken Aoba up. Scowling, he wanted to search around for the source of noise but Noiz was faster as he switched the alarm off before he came back to attend to Aoba.

“Morning,” he whispered into Aoba’s ear. Aoba merely mumbled and pulled the sheets up to cover half of his face, still fast asleep.

Noiz smiled at the sight and pushed his weight on Aoba’s body, causing Aoba to scowl in his sleep.

“Are you waking up?” Noiz said quietly as he stroked on Aoba’s cheekbone, his heart gave a quick leap when Aoba replied with a hoarse, groggy voice that Noiz hadn’t gotten a lot of chance to hear.

“A bit more…”

“How long is a bit more?”

“Hmm… five more minutes…”

Noiz’s smile brightened. Across time, he’d found out about Aoba’s sleeping habit and this part of his never failed to trigger a faint sense of warmth beneath his chest. Leaning closer, he kissed Aoba on the cheek, then on the neck before he stroked him on the hair.

“Five minutes then.”

He tried not to move too much as he hugged Aoba from behind and buried his face against Aoba’s shoulder.

It was 7.30 a.m. when Aoba finally woke up. Finding it slightly hard to breathe, he turned around just to see Noiz’s face right beside his.

“Noiz!” he whispered.

Noiz grunted softly. Aoba watched as he slowly opened his eyes, instantly mesmerized by the mere sight – a sight of a pair of sleepy gorgeous eyes which he had never gotten a lot of chance to see either – as he scrambled out of Noiz’s embrace so that he could turn around to face him.

“M’nin,” Noiz muttered before he gave out a yawn.

“Morning,” Aoba replied with a smile. He was still tired and he was sure that if he was to sink back to the comfort of his pillow now he’d fall back to sleep again. “What are you doing here?”

Noiz’s curious stare told Aoba that something wasn’t quite right so he looked around the place, almost feeling his heart leaping out of his throat when he noticed where he actually was.

He didn’t even need Noiz’s smirk to tell him how red his face was now.

“So you woke up at night and sneaked into my bed when I was asleep, huh?” Noiz teased. He was staring so fervently at Aoba it made Aoba feel as if his face would burn then and there. “Did you attack me when I was asleep? Or were you expecting something from me?”

“It’s not that,” Aoba quickly interrupted. “Anyway, let’s get out of bed. It’s late.”

“It’s the weekend,” Noiz retorted, snaking his hand across Aoba’s torso and pulling him back to bed. “We can take it leisurely today, as casual as we want.”

“Seriously…”

Whatever Aoba wanted to say then was immediately stolen by a mouth-to-mouth kiss when Noiz hugged him in such a comfortable way that almost knocked the sleepiness back into him.

Needless to say, Noiz meant all that he’d told Aoba. It had been a while since they started their morning in such a passionate way anyway, Aoba told himself when Noiz started planting kisses not only on his face, but his neck, his torso, and eventually, somewhere further down. He wasn’t very much awake yet but then, as he allowed his thoughts to go into a state of daze, he figured perhaps this was exactly why it felt so good now – the in and out sense of heat that covered the whole of his body and the half-conscious mind of his that had led him to focus only on  _feeling_  Noiz’s touch on his body – all of these were less possible when he was hundred percent conscious.

It was, like Noiz said, slow and casual, a slight change to their usual lovemaking tempo but it was good nevertheless, and for once, Aoba was glad that he’d allowed his subconscious to decide things for him.

Aoba gave out a loud yawn. He could still feel the drowsiness in him and the passionate behavior that had occurred just minutes ago wasn’t helping in waking him up. He searched around for the toothpaste, one hand holding his toothbrush when he felt Noiz pushing the tube into his hand.

“Here you go.”

He took it without hesitance, squeezed the toothpaste out onto his toothbrush and started brushing his teeth.

“It’s been two hours and you’re still not awake yet,” Noiz laughed at him.

“I waner hooos fout is it?”

“I don’t understand what you’re saying,” Noiz teased again as Aoba shot him a glare.

Spitting the water out of his mouth, Aoba wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before he turned around and crossed his arms at Noiz.

“I wonder whose fault is it, huh? We could’ve been up earlier if not because of—“

“But it felt good right?” Noiz interrupted as soon as he wiped his mouth with a hand towel. “Don’t you think it’s a nice change for once? And you were the one who’d sneaked into my room after all.”

Aoba’s scowl deepened. Feeling the heat on his face, he gritted his teeth at Noiz.

“You could’ve woke me up, you know.”

“I did. But you were too tired to wake up,” Noiz defended before he gave out another smirk. “As usual.”

Aoba swore he’d throw a pillow at Noiz’s direction if they were still in the bathroom.

But he had to agree with what Noiz said. It was indeed, a nice change and secretly – which was something he’d never tell Noiz – he wouldn’t mind even if they were to experience it again.

For he had witnessed a scene so endearing that he was sure that he wouldn’t be able to forget for a very long time.

 


	30. Making Up; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fights are unavoidable; but making up is what's more important.

Living together with a person one barely knows for a year had its own pros and cons; living together with a person who was barely twenty was even more so.

There were times when Noiz pricked Aoba on the nerves in such an unintentional yet intense way that had him gritting his teeth and slamming the door behind him. He’d expected frictions between them ever so often and he’d expected themselves to calm down and be matured enough to let the matter cool down. Tensions were unavoidable; it was a growing process – a process to understand each other better – and it was just a matter of how intense these tensions tended to be.

Aoba knew all of these; and he knew that Noiz knew it too.

But what they never knew was  _how_  to make the first word sounded less provocative yet remaining their pride at the same time.

Sometimes it made Aoba feel as if he was raising a newborn, grumpy puppy that needed to learn how to take his surroundings into consideration.

This time, though, their frictions weren’t anything too serious either. It was just a matter of lack of words and Aoba’s overly conscious taking over him, the fact that they hadn’t been spending a lot of time talking things out not helping, but instead, pushing their limits to the end of the rope.

“I’ll just wait until you’re ready to tell me, then.”

That was the last thing Aoba said before he stomped out of the room, a complicated feature being the last he’d seen of his now three-month old housemate.

The moment he stepped into his own room, he regretted every action he did and every word he said almost immediately. He needed to give Noiz time, he thought as he hugged on his pillow, burying his face into the soft texture of it, the thought of smashing his head right into the wall in front of him becoming more prominent across every passing second. Noiz having difficulties to express his thoughts out wasn’t something new to him; in fact, he’d be better at it if they were done unconsciously but he also had this thing when his thinking cap would fall into another level of complexion if he was to consider things for a bit too much.

It wasn’t anything bad, of course. Aoba had to reassure himself that. He needed to remind himself that Noiz’s reservation was a result of his concern towards Aoba and that Aoba should be glad, relieved even, for it.

But yet, it didn’t erase the fact that Noiz wasn’t telling him what was bothering him and it bothered him greatly.

He was about to do what was in his mind – crashing his head against the wall, or maybe even knock himself unconscious so that he wouldn’t need to think so much about it – when he heard a few taps on the door.

“Can I come in?”

There was no way he’d say no. Without waiting for an answer, Noiz opened the door, slowly and cautiously, and when their eyes met, Aoba almost averted his eyes before Noiz paced towards him.

“What do you want?” Aoba asked, realizing how rude he’d sounded and immediately regretting his choice of words.

“Is Aoba not on the list?”

There was something with Noiz that he could  _never_ come to dislike – it was that sincere, honest, yet straightforward attitude that the moment he expressed a slight intention to make up, Aoba could literally feel it right in core of his bones.

Noiz wasn’t very good with expressing himself; he didn’t even know what he should do at times. But Aoba knew him too well to tell if he had even a little bit of that very intention and despite not doing it the right way, it was more than enough to soften Aoba down.

Simply because he understood that had become his greatest weakness; simply because he was witnessing Noiz’s growth that he found this quality of his to be so pleasantly endearing.

“You would have to work harder if you want to apologize better, mister,” Aoba purposely heightened his tone of voice, making it obvious that he had the upper hand now, and that Noiz should learn how to put down his pride once a while for him.

But Noiz didn’t need him to tell him that – he was willing to put down his pride anytime for Aoba.

And he did that perfectly well by wrapping his arms around Aoba’s waist, hugging him from the behind as he pressed his body against Aoba’s back, drawing out a small tremble from Aoba when the other felt his heartbeats so very clearly in the midst of the tight warmth Noiz was giving him now.

“Will you listen to me?” Noiz muttered against his ears. His grasp on the pillow was weak, completely unconvincing and he wanted nothing more but to replace the soft texture with Noiz’s strong warmth.

This was unfair, he thought. He would listen to Noiz anytime Noiz was ready to tell him about anything at all. But when he was confronted with such a sincere request, he was also ready to let  _his_  pride down just to make his younger, growing boyfriend feel better.

Noiz didn’t seem like he was waiting for any answers, though. Because in the next second, his embrace tightened, and then he was kissing Aoba on the head, on the ear, on the cheeks, and when he gripped lightly on Aoba’s chin, guiding him over so that he could kiss him on the lips, Aoba pushed on his chest, pulling a slight distance between them.

“Kisses won’t make it better,” he said weakly, totally unconvincing. All he  _really_  wanted was to feel Noiz’s warmth against his skin, no,  _more_ than that – he wanted to feel it right under his skin as well, where Noiz would always know how the best way to ignite that sleeping desire in him.

Noiz stared with a playful smirk. He was caught red-handed.

“…but you can try.”

He lied. Kisses  _would_  make it better. And he didn’t want Noiz to just  _try_ , he wanted Noiz to  _do_  it, and reassure him that they’d always fall back into places no matter how wrecked up they tended to be at times.

 


	31. Moving In; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A thought of how Noiz and Aoba eventually move in to sleep in the same room.

There were nights when he found himself wrapped firmly underthick blankets, trying to block the loud thunderstorms out while he forced himself to sleep; and there were times when he found himself waking up with his sheets kicked off the bed (if he was lucky, he’d find Ren still cuddling next to him; if not, well..). He was aware of how detached to the world around him when he was asleep, and he couldn’t imagine how it’d be if he was to share the bed with someone else.

Across time, he’d start to remember the scent of his own bed; it wasn’t something too different from how he had it back in Midorojima, although he needed some time of his own to finally get used to it. His bed was big enough to accommodate two and a half of him, or maybe more, if he wasn’t so prone to moving around in his sleep. It was undoubtedly comfortable, and it only needed not more than five minutes for him to doze off into sleep every time he cuddled under the sheets. His bed was something he had come to grow fond of.

But that wasn’t all – it surprised him but yet, at occasions when he found himself in _Noiz’s_  bed, it was a whole new experience altogether; an experience so refreshing and so  _Noiz_  that he couldn’t help but linger onto it as long as he could whenever he had the chance.

“You’re going to fall asleep at this rate.”

“It’s fine.”

He could hear Noiz’s hum above him, and he knew that his boyfriend was giving him one of those tender yet passionate looks, so intense that he could physically feel it behind his head. Noiz’s company wasn’t the only thing that he found addictive; the comfort of Noiz’s bed was yet another complement for what was already extremely good in the room. Then, when he felt Noiz caressing the back of his neck, and when he felt Noiz joining him under the sheets, gradually falling asleep with his body in his arms, he realized that this was how it was supposed to be after all.

He couldn’t understand why it took him so long, and – blushing at the thought – that it took few lovemaking sessions in the  _same_  room to help him notice it. But the new idea that had hit him hard in the head, that had created an impression so strong it was impossible to brush it off so easily, had him thinking.

Probably… if he could muster the courage to settle himself in the comfort of someone else; and probably, if he could put in more effort to be more conscious of his actions when he was asleep (regardless if it was possible or not), then  _probably_ , they could continue sleeping like this for a very long time.

But above all the ‘maybes’ in his head, Aoba soon realized that the very first step was the  _one step_  that was hardest to make.

He needed to break it to Noiz. He wanted to know his opinion about this; and if he wasn’t comfortable with it, he wouldn’t probe on it. He just needed to  _know_.

“I’ve been thinking…” he started one morning, when Noiz was still barely awake and his bed hair was so prominent it made it hard for Aoba to resist the urge to ruffle his hair.

When Noiz looked up at him, one hand on his coffee cup with his eyes staring intensely into Aoba’s, Aoba swallowed down his throat. This was far more embarrassing than he expected it to be. But if he was to give up now, it’d do nothing but intensifying Noiz’s curiosity and he wouldn’t need to be a genius to figure out where it’d lead to then.

“I want to move in with you.”

Noiz’s eyes brightened, the cup stopping near his lips. Aoba felt the heat at the tip of his ears.

“What are you talking about?” Noiz said, voice slightly hoarse as he put his cup down. “We’re already living together.”

“No, not that,” Aoba quickly clarified, realizing how anxious his voice sounded.  “I mean, like… moving into your room… or something like that.”

He thought he’d burn under Noiz’s penetrating gaze. But soon, the intensity softened as Noiz gave him a fascinated smirk, accompanied by a suggestive stare before he found that very pair of eyes zooming right in front of him.

“Are you sure?” Noiz asked, the mischievousness in his voice too hard to miss.

“… Positive,” Aoba reassured.

“Hmm.” Giving out a hum, Noiz settled back to his seat, now perfectly awake. “If you say so.”

Well, that was fairly quick and easy.

“I’ve been waiting for you to tell me this, if I am to be completely frank,” Noiz continued. “I thought of giving you freedom to accommodate yourself into the lifestyle here.”

Oh, so that was how it was, Aoba thought.

“But obviously,” Noiz teased again, now eyeing Aoba with unmistakable fervor in his eyes before he reached out to caress the back of Aoba’s hand. “I see that you can’t wait to fall back into the same bed as me as well.”

_As well_?

Oh.

He couldn’t understand why it took so long for him to notice that this should be how it was ever since the very start. He thought he’d be able to understand Noiz’s reservations better – the way he decided to do certain things – but clearly, Noiz had been giving him enough space and enough time to consider things through for himself.

He appreciated it. He really did.

And when he pulled himself forward to kiss Noiz on the lips, he knew that they’d appreciate their whole ‘living together’ life even better now, in both a physical and emotional sense.

 


	32. Tender Surprises; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A domestic NoiAo a day heals the soul :)

Thunderstorm never sounded so loud in his ears before, neither do the cold sensation on his hands when droplets of rain fell and trickled down his palm and dripped off it. He’d never paid close attention to these little things around him before – but now, everything amazed him. He couldn’t understand why a simple interaction with a non-living thing like this could make him feel something else entirely; and he probably would never comprehend how being in love could trigger a whole new sensation out of him, giving him a type of experience that he’d never thought he would have the chance to experience.

But that wasn’t the only thing he’d come to realize. Apart from a whole bunch of new tangled up emotions that had started to bloom out of nowhere ever since he’d come to understand what  _touch_  meant, he also found himself becoming increasingly interested with what someone else was doing, specifically,  _Aoba_.

The morning ray poured quietly into the room, not bright enough to wake Aoba up, but strong enough for Noiz to scrutinize the beautiful gradient that the sunlight had created on Aoba’s face. He’d always thought that Aoba appeared normal from the outside, if not because of his eyes which had often managed to draw something extraordinary out of him that he never knew was possible. But now, when he looked closely at his boyfriend’s features again, he noticed that he wasn’t  _normal_  at all. Perhaps he’d come to finally understand how it felt to be able to appreciate things around him; or perhaps he’d come to learn how to genuinely love another person that had incited the warm impression out of him – but at this very moment, while he twirled the ends of Aoba’s long, smooth hair, he realized that probably it was because he was dealing with  _Aoba_ that had allowed him to feel this way.

He smiled lightly when he noticed Aoba drooling, mouth slightly opened as he slept, completely unaware of the fact that Noiz had stayed up staring at his face for thirty whole minutes before he woke up abruptly, almost jumping up when Noiz wrapped an arm around his chest, pushing him back to bed.

“It’s still early,” Noiz mumbled, trying to untangle his fingers from Aoba’s hair.

“O-oh,” Aoba responded simply, still half-asleep as he cuddled right into Noiz’s chest, releasing a relieved sigh upon noticing how comfortably warm Noiz’s body temperature was in the cold morning air.

“Does it still hurt?” Noiz asked, finally able to release his fingers from Aoba’s now messed up hair while the other grumbled into his chest. “Your hair,” he continued, assuming that Aoba was still too dazed to decipher his question.

“Not really…” Aoba mumbled.

“Not really?” Noiz repeated. Unable to resist the temptation, he picked up a few strands of Aoba’s hair and kissed the tips. “It still hurts, then?”

“Mhmm…”

Smiling, he lifted a hand, caressed Aoba on the cheeks before he leaned in to plant a kiss on his face.

“Good morning, Aoba.”

 

* * *

 

The sensation of the soft and smooth texture of Aoba’s hair still lingered on his fingers even when they were both up and awake, Aoba making coffee in the kitchen while Noiz sat on the dining table, eyes fixed on Aoba the entire time.

Aoba was tying his hair up, a hairband hanging loosely in between his lips as he worked on keeping his hair in place. He was about to take the band off his mouth when he found Noiz’s hand taking it off for him, then another hand taking off the hand he had on his hair. Before he could turn around, Noiz said,

“Let me do it.”

There was something about the way Noiz stroked his hair – how his fingers dived in and out, untangling the strands, and how even though he was trying to steady his hair in place he did it with such a gentle way, that Aoba didn’t feel the slightest pain when Noiz was finally done with it.

“Thanks,” he said, attempting to go back to work when he noticed that Noiz was  _still_ staring at him, urging him to turn around and pout at him.

“Wh-what?”

Noiz gave out a light smirk.

“Nothing.”

And he returned to sit on the table,  _still_  staring at Aoba.

Aoba had noticed this habit of Noiz; he’d noticed how strong his gaze was when it was fixed on Aoba, as if trying to scan him inside out. He hadn’t asked about  _why_  Noiz was doing it, though, even though he was sure that thousands of questions were running through his mind.

When he carried the tray of coffee with a plate of homemade donuts to the table, Noiz sniffed, finally shifting his attention off Aoba and onto the donuts instead.

It made Aoba chuckle.

“What?” Noiz asked this time, a mirror of Aoba’s earlier question.

“Nothing.”

This time, it was Noiz who gave him a scowl, then a pout that Aoba was sure to miss if he was to blink at that perfect moment, before the nineteen-year-old took one of the donuts up and munched on it.

“Some things never changed, huh?” Aoba teased, supporting his face with his palms as he smirked playfully at Noiz.

Noiz swallowed down the remaining of his food, wiped his fingers with a hand towel before he lifted the coffee cup and sipped on it.

“I can say the same to you,” he said between sips, instantly drawing a surprised look out of Aoba.

“Hm? What do you mean?”

Putting down his cup, he reached out, gently swiping a finger across Aoba’s cheekbones before he cupped his face.

“You. You never changed as well,” he said, a hint of tease in his voice.

“Wh-what? Hey hey, I’ve grown up, okay?” Aoba pouted, the familiar retorts rolling out of his tongue before he could stop it.

“You sure did, but you’re still Aoba.”

Noiz calling Aoba by his name wasn’t something frequent, let alone familiar to Aoba. So when he heard his own name escaping from Noiz’s lips, he gave out a reflexive gasp.

“Aoba,” Noiz called again, standing up, leaning forward and inching so close to Aoba it made Aoba close his eyes, expecting a kiss.

But when it didn’t come, he opened his eyes, just to see Noiz smirking at him.

“This part of you didn’t change as well,” Noiz said, his breath hitting on Aoba’s lips as he spoke. “You look cute when you’re anticipating a kiss.”

“You—“

He wanted to tell him to learn how to respect his elders more, but before he could do that, Noiz lurched forward, catching him with a surprise kiss that had him moan unconsciously into his mouth.

“But I like this part of you better,” Noiz said as soon as they separated their kiss. “When you’re caught in surprise but are so fast to accept me.”

Scowling, Aoba grasped a whole of Noiz’s collar, pulling him over and pushing an aggressive yet eager kiss against his lips. The kiss lingered for five seconds before Aoba pushed Noiz away, obvious flush on his cheeks as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He thought it’d do the trick, but Noiz gave out a deeper smirk, swiping his thumb across the curve of his lips before he said,

“I could watch you all day.”

Perhaps it wasn’t the fact that he’d finally regained his sensations that had provoked such intense emotions out of him. Because he was sure that no other person but  _Aoba_ could amuse him in such an intimate yet endearing way.

And he was sure that there was no way Aoba would show such similarly passionate reactions to anyone else either. Because he was feeling what he was feeling, and that if they were given a chance, they’d watch each other the entire day, without the fear of getting bored of each other.

 


	33. Jealousy; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If there's _one_ endearing trait Aoba could point out about Noiz, it'd be jealousy.

“I’m going out now.”

After giving a still-asleep Aoba a quick kiss on the cheek, Noiz left the room, patting Ren on the head at the front door before he said,

“Remember to wake him up in an hour time.”

“Please leave it to me,” Ren said, wagging his tail as Noiz smiled at him.

He’d tried to wake Aoba up multiple times but they were all proven useless when he saw Aoba still soundly asleep under the thick sheets when he came back from washing up, when he came in again after he’d dressed up, and finally, when he was about to leave the house.

He remembered Aoba reminding him to wake him up again and again the previous night and the corners of his lips curled up when he realized that Aoba was going to rage on him when he found out that Noiz had left him without truly waking him up.

Noiz thought that it’d be interesting to see Aoba’s reaction when he  _finally_  woke up and soon enough, when he opened the door to his office room, his Coil rang.

“P! A message! A message!”

Midori jumped out of Noiz’s coat pocket, landing itself on the table and bouncing excitedly.

“Is it from Aoba?”

“P! Yes, it is!”

“Open up.”

Noiz sat on the chair, unable to hide the bemusement he was feeling within him when the hologram screen emerged from on top of the green cube, showing Aoba’s profile, then a few lines of obviously furious messages.

 

> “ _I told you to wake me up! I trusted you!_ ”

Noiz chuckled softly. Aoba never failed to amaze him. His reaction, especially, was something Noiz found himself to be extremely fond of. Tapping his fingers on the desk, he said,

“Send a reply: I’ll wait for your revenge then.”

“P! Understood! Sending reply!”

He leaned back against his chair. The sunlight was pouring weakly into the room from the bottom of the blinds behind him as he gave out a relieved sigh. It was moments like these that made Noiz feel at bliss; Aoba was here, with him, and he’d never complain about all the personal times they were spending with each other regardless of where they were.

He checked the time and gave out another sigh. He wanted lunchtime to be here already.

–

 

> “ _I’m coming up now._ ”  
> “ _I’m in my office._ ”  
> “ _Be there soon._ ”

 

It usually took only a few minutes for Aoba to make his way up to Noiz’s office. As soon as Noiz put down the call, he heard a few soft knocks on the door, and the visitor was the only person who didn’t need to wait for his permission before the door was opened, revealing an Aoba with a hand-carry bag as he closed the door behind him.

“Tough walk?” Noiz asked, grinning at the frown Aoba was directing at him before his attention was diverted to the items Aoba was carrying in his hand.

“It’s hot today,” Aoba responded. Putting the bag on the table, he searched around inside, the scowl he was wearing in between his eyebrows gradually disappeared as he worked.

“Take a rest,” Noiz suggested and was about to stand up so that he could sit on the couch with Aoba before Aoba voiced out.

“Ah, just one more thing,” he said; then, he broke into a bright smile when he found what he was looking for. Before Noiz could ask, Aoba lifted a blue container up, holding it in his hands as if it was made of glass before he walked towards the door.

“Where are you going?” Noiz asked. With a hand on the doorknob, Aoba turned around, just ever so slightly, before he quickly dismissed Noiz with a simple “Hold on.”

He never thought he’d experience loneliness again now that he had Aoba by his side. He’d been waiting for the whole morning for Aoba to come over and even though Aoba was sweat-slicked and panting when he stepped into the room, the urge to pull him into a tight embrace was so strong that he’d been extending his patience just so Aoba could settle down first.

But it seemed that Aoba had better priorities over him.

Leaning against the chair, he waited. Aoba should be back in no time, after he was done with whatever he was up to. He shifted his gaze onto the table clock, suddenly becoming way more time-conscious than he remembered himself to be before he clicked his tongue, stood up, and walked out of the room.

He didn’t need to search too hard before he found where Aoba was. His and Theo’s rooms were only a few steps away and even without the need to ask, Aoba’s loud laugh informed Noiz enough about his location as he paced, faster, towards his brother’s room.

“Thank you so much for coming all the way here for this, Aoba-san.”

His hand was on the doorknob, was about to turn it open when Theo’s words froze his action.

“No, it’s nothing,” Aoba’s voice was lighter, far smoother than when he was talking to Noiz and Noiz felt a squeeze in his chest, something he hadn’t been expecting.

“But the weather is hot, isn’t it?” Theo continued. “Do you want a glass of water?”

“I-it’s okay!” Aoba quickly rejected. “Besides, I need to—“

No longer able to sustain the frustration in him, Noiz turned the door open, instantly causing the two men in the room to stop everything they were doing and looked up at the new intruder.

“Brother!” Theo called out happily as he stood up from his seat.

“Been wondering where you are,” Noiz’s voice was cold, emotionless and when he set eyes on Aoba, Aoba could literally feel the sharpness of his stare penetrating deep into his soul.

It didn’t need a genius to find out what Noiz was implying behind the seemingly straightforward statement.

“I’m done here,” Aoba said casually instead. Standing up, he gave Theo a pat on the shoulder before he walked towards Noiz. “I tried a new recipe today. Let me know what you think about it?” he ended before he grasped on Noiz’s wrist and led the both of them out of the room.

Noiz was clearly waiting for Aoba to break the ice and Aoba closing and locking the door behind them when they stepped into Noiz’s office told him that Aoba was aware of that as well.

“So…” Aoba started. Noiz was averting eye contact with him. He couldn’t really make out what this complicated feelings within him were and he had no idea how to confront them at all. Unsure of how he should respond, he merely gazed into a corner, into nothing before Aoba nudged him on the elbow.

“Did you and Theo get into a fight or something?” Aoba probed, trying to capture Noiz’s attention but to no avail.

“Not really,” Noiz responded with a small voice.

“Hmm,” Aoba trailed off. Supporting his chin with a hand, he tilted his head, shifting his gaze to look at the ceiling before he continued. “Then why were you so cold towards him?”

Noiz refused to answer. Then, he heard a small ‘ah’ before he turned, just enough to see Aoba’s expression from the corner of his eye.

“Wait a minute. Don’t tell me…” He heard Aoba’s chuckles, then, before he knew it, Aoba forcefully turned him around, forcing him to look at him. “Are you jealous?”

Noiz could literally hear his heartbeats picking up speed; he could practically feel the heat rose to his cheeks.

“You’re jealous, aren’t you?” Aoba persisted with a mischievous smile. When Noiz refused to respond any further, Aoba broke into a loud laugh, ruffling Noiz on the hair and messing up his hair as his action became more aggressive with every passing second.

“So you  _are_  jealous,” Aoba teased with an idiotic smile on his face. Scowling, Noiz swept his hands off, still trying to avert Aoba’s eyes but Aoba was quick enough to cup his face with both of his hands as he stared penetratingly into Noiz’s wavering gaze.

“It’s okay,” Aoba said, his voice now softer and less naughty than before. “How should I say this…” he stuttered, visibly trying to find for the right words before he coughed softly. “It kind of… makes me very happy. I didn’t know you can portray this kind of expression.”

No matter how he was to decipher his words, they felt too much like a tease to Noiz as the frown on his face deepened. And Aoba almost gave out a gasp when a small, barely visible pout made its way onto Noiz’s face.

“Is it wrong to want to have you all for myself?” Noiz said. His question trapped Aoba’s breath in his chest because even though it sounded naïve for a brief second, when the words rolled right into him and settled on his heart, he could feel the intensity within them, and how  _genuine_  Noiz sounded at that very moment.

Smiling lightly, Aoba shook his head before he tiptoed and kissed Noiz softly on the lips.

“It’s not wrong at all. I’m yours. All yours.”

His words seemed to act like an effective assurance for Noiz – perhaps, it was all Noiz needed to hear – before Noiz enveloped him into a tight embrace, an intention of his ever since he saw Aoba walking into his room earlier.

“I trust you,” he mumbled hotly beside Aoba’s ear, urging Aoba to return his hug with a firm one of his own.

“Of course.”

Sometimes, Noiz wondered if he was giving Aoba pressure with how uncontrollable his intense emotions could be. But it seemed to him that it was garnering a total opposite of what he’d expected it to be after all.

When Aoba laughed at him and commented on how endearing he found him to be again, Noiz noticed, and was reminded – once again – on how much he was amused by this man.

And on how much he loved Aoba.

 


	34. Sight; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Imagine your otp together, one of them has fallen asleep and the glasses are slowly sliding off their face, and the other person carefully takes the glasses, folds them, and puts them away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A self-indulgence megane kink fill >:3

[There was once when Noiz returned with a pair of glasses given to him by a Scottish supplier](http://shino-cchi.tumblr.com/post/98891099459/dramatical-murder-ficlet-vision) and Aoba had to take two whole minutes to make sure that the person he was looking at now was still the same person who he had called him as his boyfriend. It wasn’t like Aoba hadn’t experienced appearance change with Noiz – his whole new outlook when he reappeared in Heibon half a year back was still a scene he couldn’t bring himself to forget so easily – but every time it happened, it pushed Aoba into a state of surrealism, wondering to himself how exactly could one person look so different yet so similar to how he thought he’d look like at the same time.

Hence, when Noiz experimentally tried on the new glasses, he merely stared, completely perplexed as he tried very hard to instill the new image into his head. He wanted to be able to accept the fact as soon as he could, but there was just  _something_ about Noiz’s appearance that had him wonder at most time. At the end, he merely concluded that it was just Noiz’s natural talent to be able to summon such a reaction out of him. He didn’t particularly dislike it, but he sure needed some time to get used to it.

“Maybe I should try this for a while,” Noiz commented, twirling the glasses in his hand and examining it while Aoba observed from the side.

“You aren’t short sighted or anything, aren’t you?” Aoba asked.

“Not the last time I checked.”

Up to this date, Aoba was still genuinely surprised at how Noiz managed to keep his eyesight on a healthy level when he was so used to spending time in darkness with a few hologram screens up for the past few years. He’d unconsciously tested on Noiz’s eyesight once when they were out for shopping, where he pointed at a signboard few kilometers away just to test if Noiz could see them properly.

The experiment proved that Noiz was perfectly healthy, but Aoba couldn’t say the same to himself.

“Do the lenses have power on them?” Aoba asked again, trying to see through the glasses to answer his own question.

“Doesn’t seem like it,” Noiz answered casually. “It’s meant to be used as part of grooming purposes.”

“Hmmm,” Aoba mumbled. The glasses was black-rimmed. When Noiz put it on, it brought out the tantalizing light of his lime-green eyes, making the colors more obvious than they already were. He could perfectly understand why the glasses was meant for a grooming purpose because if his boyfriend wasn’t already extremely good-looking without it, the new tool only intensified his appearance even more.

“What do you think?” Noiz asked, now caressing the frame with his fingers.

“Huh? You don’t have to ask. Do whatever you like.”

Noiz gave him a suggestive smirk.

“I thought of asking you first. If you like it, I’ll keep it. If not, I’ll leave it alone.”

The statement sounded familiar and Aoba coughed loudly, stood up from his seat, and left the room without another word.

The next time he entered the room, it was dimly lit, the only light source being the light on the office table as he looked around, trying to see through the darkness to catch sight of a hint of blond. As soon as he found what he was looking for, he gave out a sigh.

“How many times do I need to tell you not to work in the dark?” he reprimanded. But as soon as he reached Noiz’s side, he clasped a hand against his mouth, regretting the loud sound he’d made earlier.

Noiz was soundly asleep. His hologram screens were still up and the lights from them created a beautiful gradient on his face as he leaned his face against the surface of the desk, his snore barely audible. Noiz was serious about keeping the glasses because at this moment, Aoba could see the outline of the black-rimmed material from the very weak light sources as clear as day. And when he looked closer, he realized that it had slipped slightly off his face while he slept, immediately evoking a small laugh out of him.

“Brat,” he whispered. Carefully taking the glasses off his face, Aoba patted his head, feeling hesitant to wake Noiz up from his sleep when Noiz fidgeted, now sleeping with his mouth slightly agape.

Aoba spent the next few minutes doing nothing but staring at his boyfriend’s sleeping face, the glasses well-folded in his hand. It took him another half an hour to finally wake Noiz up, earning himself a dissatisfied grunt before he pestered a sleepy Noiz back to sleep in his bedroom.

He guessed he didn’t mind it after all. Noiz had certainly changed, but he remained as the Noiz Aoba remembered him to be from Midorijima. And he wouldn’t mind a refreshing change of his appearance as well.

Probably, he could make an effort to try out new things for himself, if that means he could also surprise Noiz like how Noiz did to him.

 


	35. Tantalization

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For all you know, Noiz might appreciate Aoba's hair more as much as Koujaku did >:3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This prompt is also known as the Aoba’s hair appreciation prompt >:3

Ever since they spent their first night together in Platinum Jail Hotel, Noiz noticed one thing – apart from the many features of Aoba he’d come to adore, he often found himself couldn’t get his eyes off his hair. Sometimes, he wondered how it’d feel like to have hair as long as Aoba’s – would it be a hassle to take care? How would the texture feel against the skin at the back of his neck? Or along his back, or across his shoulders?

These were all sensations he’d never get to know, despite having the perfect ability to feel all of these now.

“I… I can’t anymore,” Aoba panted, a choked moan escaped his lips when Noiz thrust just one more time before he stopped deep inside Aoba, lingering on the intimacy both of them shared as he felt Aoba’s insides contracted, giving him a full body shiver before he finally pulled his dick out.

Aoba was still hard, the heat slowly subsiding when Noiz crawled on top of him, wrapping him in a tight embrace as he buried his head in the crook of Aoba’s neck.

“No more,” Aoba whimpered. “I’m exhausted.”

Getting the hint, Noiz hummed, hot breath hitting Aoba’s neck when Aoba patted him on the head.

“Shower?” he asked, playing with the tips of Noiz’s short blond hair. “Sticky.”

“Later,” Noiz mumbled against his skin, eliciting a laugh out of Aoba as he pushed Noiz out of the way.

“S-stop! Tickles.”

Sensing a chance, Noiz smirked, hand dancing on Aoba’s torso – noticing Aoba’s horrifying look – before he attacked his ribs, almost causing Aoba to roll off the bed.

“W-wait! This is unfa—hahahaha! Stop, stop!”

If Noiz wasn’t physically bigger and tougher than Aoba he was sure that Aoba would’ve kicked him off the bed. He almost managed to do just that until Noiz launched forward and engulfed him in a whole body hug again, trapping Aoba’s breath against his shoulder.

“Hey, cut it off,” Aoba said in between laughs. “Let’s go for a shower.”

“Smells nice,” Noiz said out of a sudden. With hands placed against Noiz’s chest, Aoba stared, clearly waiting for an answer before Noiz responded. “Your hair.”

“O-oh, thanks, I guess,” Aoba smiled awkwardly. He allowed Noiz to linger to his smell a bit longer and it was only a whole five minutes later that he was finally able to rush Noiz into the bathroom.

While they waited for the water to heat up, Aoba sat under the shower, fiddling with his hair and untangling the strands. Noiz came back with a bottle of shampoo in his hand, placing it beside Aoba before he sat behind him.

“Need help?” he asked. The damped skin of Aoba’s had strands of his hair stuck against his skin, tempting Noiz to tidy them up, or even better, to clean them up.

“I can do it myself but,” Aoba looked back, giving Noiz a shy glance from the corner of his eye, he continued. “If you want to help… I won’t stop you.”

Noiz relieved smile was an effective enough answer for Aoba and before he knew it, Noiz was brushing the scattered strands off his back, gathering them into his palm as he reached out to squeeze a handful of shampoo onto it.

“Does it still hurt?” he asked while he scrubbed carefully on Aoba’s hair.

“Hm? You mean the sensations? No, I don’t feel anything anymore.”

Noiz let out a hum, which Aoba deciphered as a note of acknowledgement.

The rest of the time was spent with Noiz washing Aoba’s hair while Aoba busied himself with the cleaning of his own body. The only sounds echoing around the room being the sound of scrubbing sponge against soft texture and the sound of spraying water from the showerhead.

“Ready for the rinse?” Noiz asked, responded by a nod from Aoba. Standing up, both of them stood under the shower, Aoba with his eyes closed while Noiz continued fiddling with his hair, occasionally combing out the tangled strands with his fingers and tenderly washing the soap out of his hair.

“All done,” he said after a long while.

“Thanks.” Running his hands through his hair, Aoba hummed quietly, seemingly enjoying the perfect temperature of the shower water on his skin when he felt Noiz hugging him from behind.

“What is it?” he asked, reaching back to ruffle Noiz on the hair. “Do you want me to wash your hair for you too?”

“Not really,” Noiz responded quietly, a voice so small Aoba almost missed in the midst of the loud echoes in the bathroom. “Let’s stay like this for a while.”

Often, Aoba would find Noiz portray such behavior, in which Noiz would clung onto him, doing nothing but leaned against him, sometimes planting sporadic kisses on wherever he could reach. But this time, instead of finding him doing any of those, he heard Noiz smelling his hair, a deep breath close to his ear. Then, the next thing Noiz did have Aoba jumped a little.

“Oi, Noiz,” he struggled before he felt Noiz pulling him closer, practically sticking his chest against Aoba’s back.

It started with a lick, then, Aoba didn’t need to look to know that Noiz was sucking on the ends of his hair tips. Even though he’d told Noiz that he couldn’t feel sensations in his hair anymore but the slight pull he felt from Noiz when he sucked a bit too hard on it painted a body of goose bumps on him as he trembled out of reflex, grabbing onto Noiz’s arm to prevent himself from slipping.

“What are you doing?” he whimpered, almost clawing into Noiz’s skin when Noiz stopped licking his hair and proceeded to sucking on the back of his neck instead.

“Your hair looks delicious,” Noiz said casually and, without waiting for Aoba’s next response, he went back to indulge a whole of Aoba’s now slightly flustered skin. It was the kind of skin tone that intrigued Noiz the most, especially now when he wasn’t sure if the flush was caused by the heat in the shower or by Aoba’s embarrassment.

Regardless, judging from the way Aoba leaned against Noiz, when he closed his eyes and let out a soft moan, Noiz knew that he shouldn’t take Aoba’s words too seriously after all.

Because no matter how he looked at it, Aoba was definitely more than ready for a second round.

 


	36. Proposal; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noiz took his own step to make Aoba his when he decided to head back to Germany and prepare a better life for Aoba.  
> But Aoba had his own thoughts about making Noiz his as well, in his very own way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I believe that it’s possible for either one of them to propose. I usually love to write Noiz proposing because Aoba’s reaction is too cute and lovely; but when I write Aoba proposing, it’d be a whole new thing altogether. It’d holds a similar yet different meaning, but it’d be equally overwhelming.

He thought he was waiting for the right time. But  _when_  was exactly the right time? When he moved to Germany with Noiz, he’d assumed that he was on the right track, that this was the life he wanted. On top of that, he  _knew_  that he wanted to be with Noiz so naturally, this was how it’d end up to be. But reality hit him right in the face when he set foot in this foreign land – Noiz might be, no, he was  _definitely_  pleased to have Aoba in his life; he wanted Aoba, he  _needed_ him. And Aoba knew that he was the same so  _naturally_ , he thought that he’d have nothing to worry about, believing that he’d done the right decision.

But as he expected, things were not as simple as he thought it’d be. It’d be easier if Noiz was an orphan but he wasn’t – he was  _Wim_ , he was the son of a very influential family in Germany; a family who had once disregarded their relationship.

“Hmm,” Sitting cross-legged with a pen balanced between his lips and his nose, Aoba frowned, staring down at the document he was reading before he abandoned the effort, giving out a huge sigh and let himself fall onto the bed.

“I can hear you from outside the door,” Noiz peeked into the room. The moment Aoba made eye contact with him, he pushed the door open and walked in to sit beside Aoba.

“This is work,” he said with obvious dissatisfaction in his tone.

“Uh huh,” Aoba replied simply. “I need to hand this in tomorrow.”

This time, it was Noiz who gave out a sigh as he took the document out of sight, placing it on the bedside table before he crawled on top of Aoba.

“H-hey, later, I still need to—“ Aoba quickly said, but was immediately interrupted when Noiz leaned in and stole the rest of his words with a kiss.

“Leave it for tomorrow,” Noiz said. Then, a frown appeared in between his eyebrows as he clicked his tongue. “I need to talk to Theo about this.”

“About work?”

“About  _you_.”

Aoba knew perfectly well what Noiz meant – he’d always have an opinion when it came to his company having Aoba to work more than he should.

“I’m fine, Noiz,” Aoba reassured. “Work is work. Besides, I’m working for the both of us. And this is what I want.”

“Is this really what you want?” Noiz was quick to respond. “I’d prefer you to stay at home and do whatever you want, to be honest.”

“Nope,  _this_ ,” he pushed Noiz away, sat up, and took the document from the bedside table, placing it on his lap. “…is what I want.”

Noiz sighed again. He’d told Aoba before and he was sure that no matter how many times he was to point it out, he knew that he was simply reminding himself of how persistent Aoba could be; just like how he remembered him to be.

But he could never understand why Aoba had insisted as such – he was sure that he was perfectly capable of managing both him and Aoba together. He’d confirmed, again and again, with Aoba if working in his company was really something he wanted. And Aoba had, again and again, confirmed with him that it was what he wanted, that he wanted to be someone who was capable enough to support Noiz.

He wanted to do something  _more_  – not just supporting him, but giving him  _more_ , something that couldn’t be physically obtained.

 

* * *

 

Four years into their Germany life, Aoba had found himself in a situation where he wanted to do  _more_  for Noiz. Their life was filled with nothing but bliss – they’d explained their relationship with Noiz’s family, albeit ended up in a cold war for months before they finally  _spoke_  again. Aoba was persistent, but he was also insecure at the same time; the thought of not being good enough for Noiz and for his family still came back to haunt him once in a while. But Noiz was persistent in his own way as well – he’d assured Aoba that he was good enough, in fact,  _more_  than good enough for him, that he was everything and the only he ever wanted.

Aoba believed in him, which was what had led him to this decision.

He told Noiz that he wanted to watch him grow by his side, he wanted to experience the world with him, to learn new things with him, and to give him memories so many they wouldn’t be able to remember them all.

But more importantly, he knew that that wasn’t the only thing he wanted to do for Noiz.

He wanted Noiz to feel  _belonged_ ; he wanted Noiz to know that he was worth it.

He still had a tiny hint of insecurity when he sat on the balcony, caressing the premium material of the velvet box he was holding firmly in his hand. He’d dropped Noiz enough hints and he was sure that Noiz was pretty aware of his decision. He was sure that Noiz had put their relationship into a perspective larger and more important than he could ever imagine.

But there was  _one step_  they hadn’t done. And if any, Aoba wanted to be the one who’d give Noiz the promise; to  _reassure_  Noiz that he was dead serious about spending the rest of his life with him.

“Coming to bed?” Noiz had sneaked up behind him, hugging him from the back as he kissed Aoba on the back of his neck. Aoba let out a small smile, feeling the nervousness within him subsided slightly upon realizing that the person he was facing was Noiz after all. There was no need to be reserved when it came to his nineteen-year-old brat.

“I need to talk to you,” Aoba said, turning around to encircle his arms around Noiz’s neck before he gave him a mischievous smirk.

Noiz smiled. Aoba wasn’t sure if Noiz knew what he had up on his sleeve, but he knew that Noiz was willing to wait – like how he’d waited for him for the past years.

As they got themselves comfortable under the sheets, Noiz pulled Aoba over by the waist, pressing their bodies together as he hugged him, smelling in the pleasant scent of him that they’d shared in the shower earlier that day.

“So? You said you want to tell me something,” he said out of a sudden, causing Aoba to give out a silent hitch of breath, suddenly feeling the nervousness rolling back into him.

“Y-yeah,” he stuttered before swallowing down his throat. “I’ve been meaning to ask you but I didn’t know when the right time to do this is.”

“There might not be a right time,” Noiz responded casually. “You can always tell me anything, anytime.”

Noiz had a point, and he’d been telling Aoba this for the longest time ever.

“This is serious,” Aoba pressed. Sitting up a little, he crawled on top of Noiz, sitting on his abdomen and cupped Noiz on the face.

“Listen, Noiz,” he said, staring straight into Noiz’s face. “I want you to know how grateful for me to be here by your side. I appreciate everything you have done for me.”

“I know,” Noiz responded, obviously slightly taken aback by the sudden turn of events.

“And I thought it’s about time to do this,” Aoba continued, as if ignoring what Noiz had just said.

He took a deep breath, stretched to take something out of the drawer of their bedside table before he turned his attention back to Noiz, who was curiously looking at the small item in Aoba’s hand. Aoba quickly took that out of sight.

“Listen,” he repeated, emphasizing on how important this was. “I love you, Noiz.”

“I love you, too,” Noiz said out of reflex.

“Shh,” Aoba pressed a finger against his lips. “Don’t interrupt.”

Noiz smirked. Perhaps he’d figured out how Aoba had run through this script for the umpteenth time in his head.

“I never know where the right time to do this is,” Aoba admitted. “Ever since I moved here I know that we have established a relationship, something that both of us know is more than how anyone perceived it to be. We have been through risk – you told me that even though your family has an opinion towards our relationship, you wouldn’t mind a single bit and that you wouldn’t allow  _anyone_ to interfere. I trust you.”

Noiz seemed confused. Aoba wasn’t a natural with words and he amazed Noiz on how he was being so genuine and upfront with his sudden confession at this very moment.

“I want to continue this relationship,” Aoba said.

“I’d be heartbroken if you don’t,” Noiz joked, earning himself a light smack on his head.

“But I want to do more than that,” Aoba pressed. “I want to.. do more.”

His voice turned slightly small at the end but he quickly coughed. Then, without warning, he brought the velvet box up to Noiz’s face, opening it in front of him to reveal a delicate diamond ring.

“I know that we don’t need anything more to label our relationship. But I want to do this for you,” He took the ring out of the box, showing Noiz once more before he slipped the ring into his own finger. “I want to be yours.”

For a long time, Noiz merely stared, mouth slightly open, at the sudden confession. Aoba could feel the heat on his face and he didn’t need a mirror to know how red he was. He couldn’t even believe what he had just done.

“I thought of doing this for you but…” Noiz started slowly. Taking Aoba’s hand up, he smiled softly at the ring, the exquisite material glimmering dimly under the very little light source in the room. “I wanted to give you this first. But you found it.”

“I don’t know how long you have been keeping this from me. I don’t know when you’ll be making your step. But I don’t want to wait any longer. I want to accept you, in all sense possible,” Aoba said. He took Noiz’s hand off his, kissing his fingers then entwining their fingers together. The new metal sensation they found on their skin caught their breath in their chest; they had still yet to let the reality sink in.

A few moments later, Aoba picked the other ring out of a similar box that he’d taken out together when he took the first. Opening it up as how he did with the first, he took the ring out, then held Noiz’s hand up, flinched at the sight of Noiz’s crooked little finger before he looked up to look at Noiz in the eyes.

“Will you marry me, Noiz?”

Noiz didn’t need to tell him the answer. Because he already knew his answer when Noiz buried his head in Aoba’s shoulder, the slight shiver he felt on his skin when Noiz embraced him and the almost – the one he’d missed if he hadn’t forgotten to breathe – inaudible sigh of relief he heard beside his ear when he patted Noiz on the head. He was sure that Noiz would break down then and there if he had forgetten how to be  _so strong_  despite the nasty or, in this case, life-changing circumstances he was thrown into.

Perhaps he wasn’t the only insecure one; perhaps Noiz was way more insecure than he was.

And perhaps this was the one thing he really needed to do – the one thing he’d done right – that had given Noiz more assurance, even more than he thought he needed.

He didn’t know how Noiz had been waiting – either waiting for him to make the move or for himself to finally have enough guts to do this. But he knew that eventually, they’d reach here.

Because Noiz had told him so when he took the ring out of his hand, slipped it into his finger and kissed him.

There wasn’t any need for more proof, or more labels between them for them to know how much they cherished each other. Their existence by each other’s side was the best proof – and it would remain as such for the rest of their life.

 


	37. Sickness; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A sick Noiz accompanied by an worrisome Aoba.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Branching out from [Heat of the Moment](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3547730). What if Noiz actually went to work when he’s sick?

He was sure that he’d landed himself a fever; the heat he was feeling both within and on his skin had told him so. When he woke up earlier in the morning, he’d felt physically difficult to lift even a finger. His head heavy, his throat sore, and when he saw the look on Aoba’s face when he came into the room, he knew instantly that Aoba had noticed it even before he could tell him what was wrong.

“Stay at home today,” Aoba urged with a frown. He pushed him back to bed, but Noiz already had one leg off the bed, and one hand trying to push a few buttons off the hole of his sweat-slicked shirt. 

“There’re a few urgent matters to settle today,” he finally spoke, which he hoped he didn’t because the throbs in his throat the moment he did that immediately made him press his hand to his throat.

“It hurts, right?” Aoba asked, concerned. “I’ll make you something to drink. Please go back to bed.”

But as soon as Aoba stepped out of the door, he soon noticed that his reprimand wasn’t working on Noiz at all. The sick man was standing right behind him, waiting for him to move so that he could walk out of the room as well.

“I told you to—“

“There are a few…”

“ _Noiz_ ,” Aoba’s voice was stern, but so was Noiz’s gaze. A few seconds of staring competition later, Aoba gave out a sigh, placing the back of his hand against Noiz’s forehead to check on his temperature again before he smiled bitterly at him.

“What would you do without me, I wonder?”

Noiz gave out a weak smile, and the hug he gave Aoba later told him that he didn’t know what’d happen to him either if Aoba wasn’t looking after him a lot more than how he was looking after himself now.

It took longer than usual but they made it just on time. Aoba constantly shooting Noiz with a cautious look with every step he took. Noiz looked normal from the outside; but Aoba was too observant to notice that he’d been sweating a lot more than usual. His actions seemed to be staggering a lot more as well; and often, he needed a few extra seconds to respond when someone spoke to him. 

It wasn’t hard to notice that he wasn’t his usual self at all.

“Brother, are you okay?” Theo asked, a worried expression gracing his feature as he gazed at Noiz, who had just leaned back against his chair in the meeting room, eyes closed and breathing heavy.

“Fine,” he replied heavily, a tone of voice that was a huge contrast to the one he’d used just minutes ago for his project presentation.

“Obviously not.”Aoba, who had been fearing that he might collapsed halfway through his presentation, blurted out with a stern voice. 

Surprised, Noiz opened his eyes, catching Aoba’s warning glare before he sighed, attempting to stand up when he found his world spin, causing him to immediately grab onto the nearest object he could find to keep himself in balance.

“You don’t seem very well, Brother.”

He could hear Theo’s worried voice beside him. Clicking his tongue, he closed his eyes again, took a few seconds to regulate his breathing and opened them again as he coughed, just loud enough to pronounce his intention for both Aoba and Theo to drop the topic.

“Maybe you should—“

“Let me take over,” Aoba interrupted, rushing up to grasp onto Noiz’s arm before Noiz could walk out of the room. 

“I told you, I’m—“

“Shh.”

Aoba didn’t even allow Noiz to finish his words as he opened the door to his office, escorting him to sit on the couch before he finally released him. 

“Let big brother take care of you, okay?” Aoba continued, giving Noiz a mischievous wink before he strode off to the corner of the room to pour Noiz a glass of water.

Noiz sank into the comfortable material of the couch. His head was heavier than when he woke up this morning; the heat more serious than he remembered it to be. He pulled on his tie, loosening it slightly, just enough for him to breathe properly when Aoba returned with not only a glass of water, but also two tablet-sized pills in his palm.

“Take this,” he said, placing the two pills into Noiz’s hand. “It’ll heal you.”

“When did you get this?” Noiz asked, already feeling sweat forming in his palm when he released his fist of the other hand to take one pill up. 

“I grabbed them before I left the house today,” Aoba said. “Now, eat up before your fever gets worse.”

Noiz gave him an appreciative smile. Giving the medicines another cautious look, he took one of them up, opened his mouth, and placed it near his throat as Aoba pushed the glass towards him.

“One more,” he said. 

Noiz obeyed without further question. As soon as he felt the presence of the two pills in his throat, he took the glass and drank the medicines down in one gulp.

“Now, I need to get you something light to eat,” Aoba said, a relieved smile bearing his feature. “Hmm, soup? Or perhaps porridge would be bet—woah!”

As he wondered, Noiz collapsed, leaning his head against Aoba’s shoulder and Aoba had to quickly grab onto him before both of them could fall off the couch. 

“Are you okay?” 

Noiz didn’t need to look at Aoba’s expression to know that he was probably almost at the verge of crying at this very moment. It was obvious that Aoba was worried; in fact, Noiz had noticed that he’d tried to hide his worries ever since he discovered that Noiz had landed himself a fever. He didn’t want to worry Aoba – never wanted to – but at the same time, he wanted to work for Aoba too. 

But he’d never expected his physical condition to become worse than he expected it to be.

“Let’s go home, you’re too sick,” Aoba’s voice was gentle, so was the soft pat he was giving Noiz on the back now. He leaned into his touch, nuzzling his cheek against Aoba’s neck, feeling Aoba’s patting on his head now as he let his eyelids fall. 

Perhaps it was the aftereffect of the medicines, but he wanted to believe that it was Aoba’s assuring touches that had given him comfort so effective that he knew that he was safe in Aoba’s hands. 

And when he heard a soft hum of what sounded like a lullaby, he gave out a reflexive smile, allowing darkness to fall upon his conscious and allowing surrendering himself to Aoba, something that he’d never done for anyone in his past ever.  

 


	38. Frustration; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Separation only makes the heart grows fonder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature content.

Midorijima was just a word away. Of all the times Aoba returned to the island for a visit, Noiz had managed to take some time off work to accompany him. But there were times when he was way too overloaded for more days off, leaving Aoba with no choice but to return by himself. It wasn’t like Aoba minded anyway. Rather, he’d told Noiz countless times to make sure that he’d gotten his priorities right even though the other always held an opinion towards what was deemed first for both him and Aoba. Noiz had outwardly told Aoba that  _he_  was always top on his priority list and Aoba had assured him countless times that he  _knew_  how important he was to Noiz; but at the same time, he found himself playing a role to remind Noiz of the difference between a long-term and a short-term priority.

The last thing Noiz ever wanted was to trouble Aoba, and he’d respect any decision Aoba was to make. That was why when Aoba booked a one-person flight ticket for himself, he helped him out with his packing, despite feeling the small stab in his heart when his boyfriend was all ready to depart one night before his flight.

“C’mon, don’t make that face,” Aoba slapped both of his hands against both sides of Noiz’s face and pressed them, eliciting an annoyed pout out of his boyfriend. “I’ll be back in no time!”

Noiz  _knew_  he would be back before he knew it, especially when he was to indulge himself in the pile of work waiting for him on his study desk. Being busy had its pros and cons – it was a good way to fast forward time in an unconscious way; but at the same time, it was also the reason why he had to part with Aoba for a week.

“Besides, I’ll still call you every day to check on you. Make sure to eat when I’m not around. No one’s going to remind you if you don’t remind yourself. Speaking of which…” Aoba released Noiz, turning his back towards him to look around the room. “I better remind Midori too. Just in case.”

He was about to leave but Noiz pulled him back with one strong pull, causing him to fall inelegantly straight into Noiz’s embrace.

“Hey!”

He already missed him before he could even leave. Hugging him close, he inhaled the nice scent that was the shampoo Aoba had used for the night, carefully feeling Aoba’s warmth in his arms as he closed his eyes, trying as hard as he could to memorize these sensations of Aoba.

“C’mon…” Aoba raised a hand to pat Noiz on the head. “You’re making me hard to leave, you know?”

“Won’t you miss me?” Noiz mumbled instead. Aoba had been acting so carefree for the entire time and it was starting to make Noiz feel as if  _he_  was the only one overreacting here.

“Of course I will!” Aoba responded almost immediately. “I’m just trying not to make it hard for the both of us.”

He’d known how tough Aoba could be, but this maturity level was something he had yet to learn. Feeling the need to toughen himself up, he broke their hug, Aoba turning his head around just in time to see Noiz giving him a suggestive smirk.

“This is hard to get used to,” Noiz explained. “Not only that I won’t be able to see you for seven whole days, I won’t be able to hear your voice too.”

“What are you talking about?” Aoba pouted. “I just told you that I’ll call you every day to check on you.”

“But,” Noiz grasped on both of Aoba’s wrists. “I won’t be able to touch you like this. Won’t you miss this?”

“I…”

Of course he would miss this. But he wasn’t going to tell Noiz just like this. Deepening his frown, he struggled out of Noiz’s clutch, crossing his arms before he continued,

“Here’s the deal – this is a great opportunity for you to learn about self-restraint, brat.”

“What are you suggesting?” The grin on Noiz’s face now held a hint of curiosity on top of the initial tease and Aoba couldn’t help but feel that he might have placed himself into a dangerous trap.

“For these seven days, you’re to refrain yourself from touching yourself.”

Noiz’s perked a curious eyebrow, one corner of his lips curved higher, a clear signal that told Aoba that he’d captured his attention.

“And you’ll do the same?” Noiz smirked, his voice dangerously low, a hint of mischievousness glinted in his eyes as he stared penetratingly at Aoba, eagerly waiting for his answer.

“W-well, of course I will!”

“Hmmm,” Noiz was obviously teasing him but it was too late to take his words back as he looked away, pouting and frowning, and attempting to hold his composure firm enough before he could pull out of this trap he’d set up for himself.

“This is by far the stupidest plan you’ve ever had.” Aoba almost rushed up to him for a good smack on his head.

“You can say no if you want.” But instead, he sent a glare at Noiz’s direction, feeling the determination within him crumble with every passing second when he caught sight of how Noiz’s expression softened with the stare he was giving him.

“I’m in. But,” Noiz held his word, stretching an arm for Aoba to come over. “… tonight is not counted as part of the seven days, right?”He wasn’t going to tell Noiz that he agreed to what he was saying, but his action had spoken loud enough for Noiz to know the answer anyway. And before he knew it, he was swept back into Noiz’s pace, sitting on his lap and indulging every bit of his warmth while it lasted.

 

* * *

 

If Noiz hadn’t given him a suggestive yet seductive smirk right after he’d kissed him goodbye at the airport, the thought of ‘touching himself’ probably won’t stay so vividly in his head now. 

He let out a heavy sigh when he was seated comfortably on the plane, realizing that  _he_ was the one who’d brought this up and now he had to suffer his own consequences.

He took a deep breath, then looking at the pile of brochures in front of him, attempting to find something to distract himself from thinking too hard.

But  _nothing_  he did eased the tension within him and before he knew it, he was gazing out of the window, trying very hard to ignore the heat that was starting to course through his lower half.

He wasn’t even thinking of  _anything_. He was only thinking about  _Noiz_. But it took him another heavy sigh to realize that  _Noiz_  was exactly  _everything_  and the  _only_  thing that would make him regret the ‘deal’ he’d set up between them.

 

* * *

 

Few days in Midorijima wasn’t as bad as he thought it’d be. He had enough distractions. He helped out around the house, caught up with few friends, did some shopping for his Germany home. But when it came to the time when he’d have to call Noiz as part of his promise to him, he found himself blushing, even hearing his own heartbeats in his ears when the ringtone that was personalized for Noiz rang in his ears.

> “ _Did you eat lunch?_ ”  
> “ _I did. The one you labeled in the fridge, right?_ ”  
> “ _Yeah. Just heat them up._ ”  
> “ _I did._ ”

They were just normal conversations; normal “is everything okay?” kind of dialogues that suggested  _nothing_  at all. But Noiz’s voice was an aphrodisiac of itself. He didn’t even need to talk dirty to him to remind Aoba of all the things he’d whisper in his ears when they were in bed together. It was becoming hard to talk. Occasionally, Aoba found himself hanging the call abruptly when it was too hard to bear and calling back once he calmed down to apologize.

The ‘deal’ had obviously taken a toll on him. If he hadn’t set this very deal between them, he probably won’t be so self-conscious towards everything  _Noiz_  said.

_Noiz_.

He gulped down his throat. Rolling to his sides, he closed his eyes tight, restraining the desire to tend to the urgency that was his rising boner and trying to force himself to sleep all at once.

It was an impossible mission. There were too many things he missed about Noiz – his warmth, his voice, his smile, the allusive stare he’d give him every time he was aroused.

He missed  _everything_  of Noiz.

And he wanted to be home already.

 

* * *

 

He literally launched himself at Noiz the moment he saw him at the airport.

“What is it? You’re—“

More words than that was too long for him to wait. He immediately pressed his lips against Noiz’s, catching him in a feverish deep kiss and felt, as much as he could, before Noiz returned his kiss, no less passionate than his own.

“Someone’s impatient,” Noiz smirked.

He missed this – he missed this grin Noiz was giving him now; he missed the flicker of naughtiness in his eyes; he missed his  _voice_.

“Is everything okay?” Aoba dismissed, realizing how  _impatient_  indeed he was.

Noiz had been on his mind the entire time, to the extent that it almost felt as if the trip back to Midorijima this time was pointless.

“You checked on me every day, you should know it yourself.”

Noiz did it on purpose; he  _knew_  that Aoba was trying to distract himself.

“W-well, in case you decide to hide anything from me,” Aoba pouted.

“Hmm, maybe you’re right,” Noiz hummed. Aoba turned immediately, shooting a curious glare at his direction. “I  _might_  be hiding something from you.”

“What is it?” he asked, wasn’t sure if the bad feeling within him meant anything at all.

“You’ll see. I’ve booked a table for dinner, by the way.”

Noiz didn’t even try too hard to divert the topic. But when Aoba intended to probe more, his boyfriend had picked his luggage up, then walking towards the exit, leaving him to chase after him, still confused and curious.

 

* * *

 

He didn’t know since when did it become a routine for them to have dinner in a too-luxurious restaurant downtown every time Aoba, or sometimes, they, returned from Midorijima. When Aoba asked Noiz about it, he simply said that it was a reward for the long, tiring journey. Aoba accepted his genuine preparation, though. But even after few times of doing so, he was still not used to the high-class environment.

He’d probably never get used to it.

When they were back in their apartment, Noiz went into the shower first while Aoba unloaded his luggage. He tried not to stare too hard when Noiz came out fresh, hair still dripping wet, torso naked and lower body wrapped with only a piece of towel. He looked away the instance Noiz came near, telling him to use the shower and almost fell when he tripped on one his own luggage as he rushed into the bathroom.

The long pent-up frustration had gotten to him. He was even amazed at how aroused he already was simply by catching sight of Noiz’s naked body alone. Allowing the shower water to splash mercilessly on him, it took him half an hour to completely calm down, finally feeling all refreshed and comfortable.

But the moment he stepped into his bedroom, his jaw dropped, one hand still holding the towel on his head and drying his hair, wearing nothing but a towel on his lower half.

“Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?” he asked once he came back to himself.

Noiz had sneaked into his room, head propped against the bedhead, and seemingly – well,  _obviously_  – waiting for Aoba.

“I told you you’ll know what I’ve been hiding from you tonight.”

_Now_  he knew what Noiz was implying.

Noiz patted his side, hinting Aoba to go over. Still with a hand on his head, he walked towards him, face hot and trying not to look too amused when Noiz grasped onto his wrist the moment he was in reach.

“I’ve been wanting to touch you for so long.”

This was it – the  _voice_  Aoba had been  _dying_  to hear for the past seven days. His heart immediately picked up speed. Noiz was so accessible now; he was literally right in front of him. He could return his touch now. He could lean against him. He could hug him, kiss him. He could..

He shook his head. It was too much; the thoughts were overwhelming him and he was even starting to feel dizzy.

“What are you thinking? You don’t need to think anymore. I’m here. Right here.”

Noiz’s voice was still dangerously low – the voice he used when he was aroused; the voice Aoba was so very familiar with.

“Did you miss me?” Noiz had crept towards him, his face only inches away from Aoba’s.

Aoba nodded. He couldn’t look Noiz in the eye. He knew Noiz was giving him a deadly stare; a stare that spelt of nothing but seduction.

“I missed you too.” He didn’t even need to say his mind out for Noiz to know exactly what he was thinking about.

“That was a cruel bet, don’t you think?”

This pace was good. He’d let Noiz do most of the talking now. Because for all he knew, anything he was to say now would only appear incoherent.

“Don’t do that again.”

He wasn’t ready to face Noiz. But soon, he realized that he didn’t have the say anyhow because then Noiz was already tilting his chin over so that he was now looking directly into Noiz’s eyes. He felt his heart skip a beat.

He would never be ready to face Noiz.

“Did you touch yourself at all?” Noiz asked again, his voice now barely a whisper. But it echoed loud enough in his quiet room, and it’s all Aoba could hear at this very moment.

“I didn’t,” Aoba finally spoke. “We had a deal. I don’t intend to break it.”

“Hmm,” Noiz hummed with a smirk.

“How about you?” Aoba threw the question back at Noiz.

“I didn’t as well.”

“You sure?”

It wasn’t a question he intended to ask but it slipped out of his lips before he could stop it. Noiz was giving him a grin that spelt nothing but desire and he knew he’d stepped on a bomb field. Noiz had told him that he was a natural when it came to seducing him but Aoba never found out why he said that. Probably Noiz saw something in him that he couldn’t see himself and he wasn’t sure if he was ready to know what it was either.

“It was tough,” Noiz said. Wiping a strand of hair off Aoba’s forehead, he leaned in to kiss him on the nose, then continued. “I might have dreamed about making love to you for a few nights when you weren’t around.”

“You…”

How one could be so shameless when it came to things like these, Aoba wondered. His face was so hot and the heat was rising so fast to his head he was almost getting a headache.

“Don’t do that again,” Noiz repeated, which was responded by Aoba’s nod.

So  _this_  was what Noiz was hiding from him? And he thought  _he_  was the only desperate one.

Perhaps he was being adaptive to Noiz’s libido ever since they’d settled down together; but for the most part, he knew that the main reason why he’d reacted in such an unpredictable, almost exaggerated way was because of the fact that he was, indeed, very much in love with Noiz.

He wanted to look after him, to hold him close, and to keep feeling his warmth. Just like this.

He wanted to keep hugging him like this, keep kissing him like this.

And he wanted to feel Noiz return every single inch of his passion, just like what he was doing now.

And when they became one again, and again, he wanted to remind himself,  _and_  Noiz, that no matter how far apart they were from each other, they would always fall back into each other’s arms again.

Just like this.

Noiz’s action felt impatient. It was not before long that he found two fingers thrusting deep inside him, the furious push and pull almost had him coming then and there. There were no words between them this time – only deep, breathtaking kisses; only hot thrusts; only sweaty, frictionless skin. It was a mutual passion they shared, one that they mutually understood.

They were already used to communicating with their bodies; it was how they had been since the very first time they met. Back then, all Noiz felt towards Aoba was a fierce instinct to dominate – to  _win_. Now, all Noiz felt towards Aoba was still a fierce instinct; but not to dominate, but to love.

He was sure that Aoba was the same, if his exasperation and the increased intensity within him when he held Noiz hadn’t been a better indicator. He would do everything Aoba asked him to do. But when Aoba was to fall apart in his hands right now, at this very moment, he would get hold of him, and in turn, give him everything he needed as well.

Just like how Aoba always did to him.

 


	39. Morning View; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NoiAo morning routine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Don’t mind me, I just want to remember how beautiful you look in bed this morning.”

Noiz had been going through a bumpy week. A big, important project was handed to him and he didn’t need to tell Aoba how much the project meant to him for Aoba to know exactly that. The project would act as a driver for not only in the sense of profit gaining but it was also a chance for him to show how he was commendable enough for the company  _and_  his family. It was a chance to prove himself in the most effective manner.

Aoba wanted to be of help, of course. He spent hours in the study room with Noiz whenever Noiz had to pull an all-nighter. He helped him greatly with information gathering and data analysis. He was being the greatest help Noiz could ever ask for.

But there was only so much he could do.

He couldn’t attend meetings for Noiz; he couldn’t negotiate ideas and plans with potential stakeholders in Noiz’s place.

And when Noiz was out there, doing what he needed to do, all Aoba could do on his part was to make sure that he came home to a comfortable environment – one that could tell him that all his effort was paid off and that he deserved all the luxury Aoba was to prepare for him.

Tonight was yet another night that had Noiz staying back in his office, until late after midnight that Aoba heard him walking in through the front door.

“Noiz,” he called, hugging Ren in his arms as he walked towards his boyfriend, who was taking off his shoes.

“You’re still awake,” Noiz said, pacing with heavy footsteps into the room and coming face-to-face with Aoba.

“I’m waiting for you,” Aoba said, rubbing Noiz on the cheek once he let Ren go.

“Told you it’s fine to sleep first,” Noiz smiled, wrapping his hands around Aoba’s waist to pull him closer before he continued with a playful look. “Not like you’ll listen to me anyway.”

“Yeah, so don’t even try,” Aoba pinched him on the nose with a smirk. Then, leaning upwards, he kissed Noiz on the lips before he returned Noiz’s smile with a gentler, less provocative one. “Welcome home. You’ve worked hard.”

“Uhuh,” Noiz mumbled, burying his head against Aoba’s shoulder before he responded. “I’m home.”

Noiz seemed like he’d fall asleep anytime soon. After rushing him into the bathroom, Aoba had to check on him every few minutes to make sure that he didn’t accidentally fall asleep in the bathtub. In the end, he found himself tying his hair up into a tall ponytail as he walked into the shower, tapping a finger on Noiz’s shoulder to wake a snoozing Noiz up.

“Come here, big boy,” he teased.

All he ever wanted now was for Noiz to have a good sleep. And all he could ever do now was to make sure that Noiz could get a comfortable rest.

 

* * *

 

He didn’t even realize it when he fell asleep by Noiz’s bedside after tucking him into bed. He must be exhausted himself and the reason why he didn’t even notice it was because of how occupied his mind was with Noiz. Blearily opening his eyes, he blinked for a few times before he rubbed a knuckle against one tired eye. Noiz was still soundly asleep, his breathing slow and the rise and fall of his chest told Aoba enough that he would be sleeping for a bit more before he finally woke up. He took a quick glance of the clock –  _7:00 a.m._  – and sighed happily when he noticed that he could allow him to sleep for at least another hour before he woke him up for work.

He should get ready for breakfast, perhaps a quick shower before that. But instead, he found his gaze stuck on his boyfriend’s face, a small smile breaking unconsciously on his face as he sat back down, completely perplexed by the defenseless, almost innocent look of his boyfriend that he seldom got to witness.

When Noiz was awake, he’d often have this guarded aura around him, as if he was constantly on vigilant mode; as if he was expecting something to attack him out of nowhere. Aoba presumed that this could be a habit garnered from how he once used to live in Midorijima. And it upset him to know that that was how Noiz’s life once was.

Unconsciously, he lifted a finger to trace the faded holes on Noiz’s earlobe – it was where Noiz’s scar once hold; the mark he’d created for himself. He then shifted his gaze to Noiz’s face instead, taking in the sight of Noiz’s peaceful feature. No matter how he was to look at him now, Noiz looked no more than another nineteen-year-old man who was still trying to create a mark for himself in this world.

He was no terrorist, no troubled child – he was just Noiz.

Smiling at the thought, he palmed Noiz’s face instead, stroking his cheekbone with a thumb as he continued staring at him, until he felt Noiz fidgeted slightly, then opening his eyes to meet his.

“M’nin,” Noiz mumbled, obviously still sleepy. Regardless, he turned and kissed Aoba on the fingers before his face broke into a tender smile. “What are you doing?”

“Don’t mind me,” Aoba mirrored his smile. “I just want to remember how beautiful you look in bed this morning.”

Noiz seemed to be momentarily taken aback as his eyes widened faintly, just to throw Aoba a smirk in the next second.

“Falling for me again?” he mocked, taking pleasure in the sight of faint blush now appearing on Aoba’s face at the end of his words.

“W-well, it’s not like I’m the only one though. Don’t think I never noticed how you stared at me when I was asleep.”

Noiz broke into a laugh.

“Yeah.” He supported himself up, just to caress Aoba’s face with one hand. “I fall in love every time I see you again.”

It was supposed to be a tease. But Noiz was using his deadliest weapon on Aoba and Aoba found himself especially helpless against him when he was faced with such a genuine Noiz.

Or perhaps, the only thing he could do now was to return his smile and lean in to kiss him. That should be more than enough for an answer.

 


	40. Heartbeats; Noiz x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thunderstorm night, warmth, heartbeats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Hear my heartbeat? Just focus on that.”

“Woah!”

He jumped a little, the sudden bellowing of thunderstorm almost made him drop the plates into the sink. It had been raining for the entire day now, the downpour gotten worse just an hour ago. Aoba had rang Noiz up, asking him if he needed him to pick him up but Noiz grunted a quick “It’s fine, I’ve got an umbrella with me” before he urged Aoba to stay safe in the house instead. He knew that the weather was going to be horrendous today - hence why he insisted Noiz to bring the umbrella out with him in the morning - but he didn’t expect thunders to start crashing on their roof as soon as the sky turned completely dark, a result of thick-covered clouds.

It was probably one of the worst thunderstorms they’d encountered ever since they’d moved to Germany.

Looking at the wall clock, Aoba emitted a sigh. Ren jumped onto the counter, placing a paw on his hand, an obvious attempt of comfort.

“Noiz said that he’ll be back in half an hour. Only ten minutes had passed now.”

Aoba smiled and ruffled Ren on the head. “I know. Thanks, Ren.”

He hoped he’d reminded Noiz to bring along a raincoat as well.

Right on the thirty minutes tick, a clicking sound resounded from the front door. Aoba almost leaped off the couch. And as expected, Noiz walked into the room, drenched from head to toe as he shook the completely wet umbrella outside the door, just to avoid dirtying the floor.

“Welcome home,” Aoba immediately rushed up to him, taking his briefcase for him and helping him out of his suit.

“Horrible,” Noiz grumbled, shaking his head as droplets of water wet the floor.

“Haha, you’re acting like a dog. Come here.” Waving a clean towel in a hand, he grasped Noiz on the wrist with another, bringing him into the living room as he settled him down on the couch before he put Noiz’s stuff aside.

“Stay still.”

Noiz seemed to be completely exhausted from the challenging journey home. Aoba could make out that much from his expression - worn out and displeased. Giving out a bitter smile, he rubbed the dry towel on Noiz’s head, drying his hair for him.

“I’ve prepared hot bath for you,” he said once he stopped to check on the dryness of his boyfriend’s hair, then chuckling as he noticed how messed up he looked like now, what with the strands of his hair standing out in different directions. “Go on before you could catch a cold.”

But Noiz remained seated on the couch, having no intention to make another move. Fixing his gaze on Aoba, he continued staring at him, as if he’d missed what Aoba had just told him.

“You’re forgetting something,” he said, purposely inching closer just to give Aoba a playful smirk.

“Hm? Dinner’s ready, though,” Aoba tilted his head. But the lack of disarray on his face told Noiz enough to know that Aoba knew perfectly well what he meant. He was just playing a comeback at him now.

Acknowledging defeat, he looked away, just momentarily, before he gave Aoba a side-way look.

“I’m back. It has been a tough day.”

Aoba almost laughed out loud but he ruffled Noiz on the head instead, mirroring his grin as he said,

“You’ve worked hard.” Moving his hands to cup his face, he pulled Noiz closer, brushing his lips against Noiz’s before he pressed harder on them. The kiss lingered for three whole seconds before Aoba pulled himself away, giving Noiz a final pat on his head and pulling him up by both of his wrists, literally dragging him into the bathroom.

 

* * *

 

“Hmm, I think I’ll need to heat this up a little before I serve it.” Lifting the spoon of soup to his mouth, he swallowed the food down in one gulp, wiping his lips with his apron before he put the cover back onto the pot. “Five minutes, maybe?”

Rain was still pouring heavily outside; even though the sky had been dark for a while now, it wasn’t hard to tell that it was already nighttime, possibly around 8:00 p.m.

“Aoba!”

Ren came running into the kitchen, his voice as frantic as his quick steps.

“What is it?” Sensing the urgency, Aoba looked down and was about to hug Ren up when–

– everything turned dark.

“…the thunder is hitting our electric box…”

He didn’t need to see Ren’s face to know that he was wearing remorse all over his expression for being two seconds too late to inform Aoba about it.

“It’s okay, it’ll be back soon, right? I’m not sure if we have any candles in the hous– ouch!”

“Aoba? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, the stool got in the way.” His toe hurt; it would probably bruise but his own condition was the least of his concern now. It wasn’t too bad when he had Ren by his side.

“Noiz?” he called out as he searched his way out of the kitchen and along the corridor. The bathroom should be… the first room on the left. He found the door, gave out a relieved smile, then turned it open.

The bathroom was pitch dark too; he could hear the sound of water dripping, possibly from the tap. He was expecting Noiz to still remain in he bathtub but when his boyfriend clasped his wrist out of nowhere, he screamed, dropping Ren and almost kicking Noiz in the crotch.

“What are you afraid of? It’s just me,” Noiz echoed loudly in the room.

“Yeah, but you don’t come out and grab people just like that!” Aoba bellowed, rubbing his chest to calm the aghast nerves down.

Noiz was obviously still half-naked; Aoba thought his hand made contact with his wet torso before he jumped out of the way. He seemed to have found the towel in the midst of black to cover his lower half though.

“Do you remember if we have candles in the house?” Aoba asked as they made their way out of the bathroom and back to the corridor.

“Don’t think so. We used up everything in our last dinner.”

He didn’t need to be reminded of  _that_  now. Halting his pace, he looked around, his eyes had already gotten used to the darkness. He couldn’t make out  _everything_ yet but at the very least, he could vaguely see the shadows of the items around him - which was an intimidating sight of its own.

There was nothing they could do now besides waiting for the lights to come back on.

“Here.” As he considered, Noiz had already pulled him towards another direction, leading Aoba towards their bedroom instead. “We can wait in the room.”

They almost tripped when their legs hit the corner of the bed. Noiz held himself back in balance first but Aoba made a slight turn and fell, head hitting the mattress before he found Noiz’s weight on him, accidentally pulling him over when he was grabbing on him for support.

“O-oh, I’m sorry!” he shrieked, wanting to sit up but then Noiz had wrapped his arms around his body, head pressed against his chest.

“Noiz?”

“Let me stay like this for a while.”

Noiz must be very exhausted - first was the rain, then this cut of lights. It must be too much for him to handle in a day. Instinctively, he stroked Noiz on the back, playfully massaging on his back bone before he heard a chortle from his younger boyfriend that he felt the heavy weight from beneath his chest being lifted.

“Tickles,” Noiz mumbled against his chest.

“What’s wrong?” Aoba then asked, moving his hand up to play with Noiz’s hair instead.

He felt Noiz’s hot breath hitting his body, almost drawing a laugh out of himself when Noiz started speaking, cutting his voice off.

“It used to happen very frequently,” Noiz whispered. Lifting his body up, he hovered over Aoba, squinting, as if he was trying to find where Aoba’s eyes were. Then, Aoba felt his finger on his face, almost hitting him on the eye before he grasped onto it and led it to his cheek instead. “This… weather,” Noiz ended with a steady stroke against Aoba’s face.

“You mean when you were still a kid?” Aoba asked with voice equally small as Noiz’s. He placed his palm at the back of Noiz’s hand, urging him to press the whole of his hand against his face, still waiting for his answer.

“…yeah,” Noiz replied after a fleeting pause. Another soft sigh later, he continued. “I was a kid then, so the loud noise was very terrifying to me. It felt as if the thunder will hit the window glass and shatter it into pieces. There wasn’t anyone around so all I could do was hide under the blanket and cover my ears, hoping that the storm would go away soon.”

Noiz must’ve reminded himself about how lonely he once was when he needed someone the most. Feeling a squeeze in his chest, Aoba took a deep breath, then grasped firmer on Noiz’s hand on his face.

“You’re not alone now,” he said with a robust tone, one that reverberated loudly in the dark room. “I’ll be here with you for all the thunderstorms we’ll encounter.”

Even without sufficient light source, Aoba could tell how uncertain Noiz looked like now. No matter how strong a person could be, there was no way they could erase their histories - or rather, their past trauma - just like that. They needed time. They may not even be able to struggle out of the fear for the rest of their life.

Noiz, being an inexperienced man, was no exception.

As if to comfort him, Aoba led his hand to his eyes.

“I’m right here, I’m not a shadow, nor an illusion” he said. “My eyes.” He then led his finger to his nose. “My nose.” Then, his mouth. “Mouth. I’m real.”

He allowed Noiz a moment to indulge himself in the reality Aoba was presenting him before he let his hand go, grasping on the back of Noiz’s neck instead and pulling him over, so that his face was now zero space from his chest.

“Hear my heartbeat? Just focus on that, okay?”

His heartbeat was the  _best_  assurance. Aoba was so very much alive, right here, right now,  _with Noiz_.

“This isn’t a dream; this isn’t Scrap,” Aoba continued. “This is  _your_ reality. And your reality consists of  _me_.”

He didn’t expect Aoba to react in such a way but he let out a smile nevertheless, closing his eyes and did what he was told - listening to Aoba’s heartbeat.

One. Two.

One. Two.

One.

Two.

It sounded like a lullaby. He could vaguely hear Aoba speaking above him but his attention was wholly distracted by his heartbeats. Never had he had someone to hold so close like this; never had he gotten the chance to listen to one’s heartbeats so close like this before.

And he knew that he’d continue listening to these alluring sounds, no matter if they were to face thunderstorms together, or if they were to experience yet another mundane everyday lifestyle. Because, like Aoba had told him - he’d be here with him to face not just downs, but ups, and probably even the ones in between. Together.

 


	41. Entwined; Koujaku x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes words are too hard even for a simple action.

There was something fascinating about how a small, almost unnoticeable touch could trigger such a huge, almost exaggerated response out of him. He thought he’d gotten used to the touch – the soft, smooth, and delicate sensation against his skin. When he picked his hand up, it almost felt like he was handling something fragile (when in real fact, he  _knew_  that it was far from that); when he gently caressed his skin, he could feel himself tracing every inch of it, slowly but surely memorizing the texture of it.

It amazed him and confused him at the same time. Because he  _knew_  that he should be familiar with this sensation already.

 

But why only now that he felt so overwhelmed by a simple touch?

Holding Aoba’s hand, pinching Aoba’s nose, or even ruffling Aoba’s hair shouldn’t be something he should become  _too_  transfixed with. He’d known Aoba for a decade and all of these seemingly simple yet tender interaction should come as something natural. But acting  _natural_  was what Koujaku was desperately trying to do now. Even when Aoba was sitting right beside him as they were surrounded by the loud noises in the parlour, he felt as if one single movement from his boyfriend would cause him to fall off his chair. Trying to act  _natural_ , again, Koujaku drowned the remaining of his beer down his throat as he gave out a loud sigh, obviously unaware of the suspicious stare Aoba was shooting him.

“Hey,” Aoba said, putting down his own glass and frowning at Koujaku’s way. “You’ve been oddly quiet today.”

They’d started dating for two months and across time, Koujaku slowly realized that his feelings towards Aoba was, in fact, not as simple as he thought it was. He  _knew_  that he loved Aoba - that was the truth both of them had come to acknowledge. And he  _knew_ that Aoba shared the same feeling as him – that was the truth Aoba had outwardly told him before he pushed the pillow into his face again.

There was nothing left to worry; well, not until now.

“You’re thinking too much,” Koujaku smiled as he ruffled Aoba’s hair, which did nothing but deepen the scowl in between Aoba’s eyebrows.

“You know…” Aoba started, but the end of his words were so soft that Koujaku couldn’t properly catch what he said, the noise around them definitely not helping.

“I didn’t get what you say?” Koujaku asked. But Aoba looked away, obviously trying to escape the topic. Before Koujaku could ask him further, he stood up.

“Let’s go back,” Aoba said, still refusing to meet Koujaku’s eyes as he strode straight to the door.

“O-oh, wait! Mizuki, we’re leaving!”

He didn’t catch what Mizuki was shouting at him either before he chased after Aoba.

In contrast with the environment they were in just minutes ago, they were now enveloped by mere silence as they walked, side-by-side, down the street they were now more than familiar with. For some reason, Aoba had been refusing interaction with him for some time now. His own problem aside, Koujaku was now more worried of Aoba instead. He was the one who’d told Aoba not to think too much, but ironically, he felt as if  _he_  was the one who was thinking too much now.

“Hey, Aoba,” he finally voiced out. There was nothing wrong, it was just his brain playing tricks at him.

Aoba didn’t respond. Instead, he fastened his steps, making it so apparent that he was avoiding Koujaku.

That was it. If there was a problem, they should voice it out. Aoba was the one who told him that. So instead of tolerating the stretched silence, Koujaku kept up with him with a mere few steps, unwilling to drop the awkwardness.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

Then, Aoba stopped abruptly, causing Koujaku to almost crash into him.

“I told you before,” he started, still looking at everywhere but Koujaku. But again, he left his words hanging for a few seconds before he looked up and glared at Koujaku. “If something is troubling you, you can always let me know.”

_Oh, so this was what was disturbing him._

“Ah… It’s not really a trouble or anything,” Koujaku smiled bitterly as he scratched his head. “It’s just…”

Unsure of how to continue, they merely stared at each other awkwardly, until Aoba gave out a sigh, then a smile.

“It’s okay. Take your time. I’ll wait for you to tell me.”

Aoba was his deadliest enemy. He was the cause of his death.

As Koujaku tried to process the sudden turn of events, Aoba gave out a loud stretch, then smiled at Koujaku again before he continued down the road.

“Let’s go home, shall we?”

Seriously, how more pathetic can he get?

Rushing up towards Aoba, Koujaku frantically said, his voice so loud he was almost shouting.

“Wait! I…”

_Say it, Koujaku._

“I…”

Aoba was shooting him the same suspicious look from when he gave him in the parlour.

This was beyond embarrassing.

“Can I…” Koujaku stuttered. By now, both of them had already stopped walking. The street was now almost empty, the time well past midnight, and the only sound accompanied them were the sound of rustling winds blowing past them.

“A-Aoba, can we hold hands?”

Time froze. Koujaku could feel the heat rising to his face and he could clearly see Aoba’s face become redder with every passing second. It felt like an eternity before Aoba frowned and gritted his words out at him.

“Y-you don’t need to ask, hippo!”

Ah, this was it. This was the familiar feeling he was waiting for.

Everything Aoba did; or perhaps, everything of Aoba was precious to Koujaku. They were important details – the way he’d blush so hard when Koujaku teased him; the way he’d frowned when Koujaku tended to escape a topic; the way he’d look at him worriedly when Koujaku stared too long into space. At the time when he’d lost his concentration and had allowed himself to wander into his own thoughts, little did he know that Aoba was also thinking about the same thing…

… the same way as how Koujaku had been thinking about him all this while.

 


	42. Star; Koujaku x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It didn't need to take too much for them to release that heavy burden within them, even for just a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I was stargazing in a field and you didn’t see me and tripped over me.”

It had been a while since he spent some time walking in this part of the street. It was empty; not a spot residents of Midorijima would choose to venture into, especially not by themselves at a quiet night like this.

It had been a stressful day at work and even though Aoba liked to consider himself as someone who was used to pressure and was perfectly capable to handle his own stress level, he couldn’t deny the fact that he still felt the need to unleash his stress once and for all, in the most leisure way he could ever use.

Walking around town was definitely not the best idea, he concluded. It was busy and filled with people – or rather, noise – and that was the last thing he needed now that his own mind was filled with overloaded buzz he intended to expel as soon as he could before they could get to him.

This part of the town was perfect – quiet, less people, but above all, it was where the green field spread and all he needed to do now was to find a spot where he could sit by himself and probably spend a few good moments calming his thoughts down.

He was just about to do just that – strolling across the dark field with faint lights from the faraway city being his only light source – when he tripped, almost landing face-front if he hadn’t found himself being supported by two hands, who’d grasped on him before he could fall.

“O-oh, thank you!” he quickly said, attempting to make out who exactly was the one he’d need to apologize to as well when he caught sight of the familiar hint of red, on both the person’s eyes and the kimono he was wearing.

“Koujaku!”

“Aoba?”

He felt a stone lifted off his chest. He’d wanted to spend some alone time here and running into someone – a stranger – wasn’t part of his plan. But if it was Koujaku, then it was a whole new story altogether.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, settling himself beside his childhood friend, who was sitting on a less-dry spot on the field before Aoba literally tripped over him.

“Ah,” Koujaku stuttered. He didn’t seem like he was expecting visitors either. “Just for a bit.”

That wasn’t answering Aoba’s question but he decided to let it pass. Lying down, he placed his hands behind his head, gazing up the sky when he felt Koujaku doing the same.

The instant he looked up, he found the answer to his own question.

The sky was bright, barely any clouds and it looked like it was sprinkled with tiny, bright objects that were the stars in a glance. Aoba took a deep breath, indulging himself in the comfortable cooling breeze accompanied by refreshing smell of grass when Koujaku spoke, breaking the silence between them.

“What are you doing here anyway? You don’t come here often, right?”

“Yeah,” Aoba said, his voice barely audible. “Just for a bit.”

It was a repetition of the answer Koujaku had given him earlier when he’d asked him the same question. But he heard Koujaku making a small sound that he knew was his smile, and in that instance, he knew that there was no need for more words between them to understand what each other were trying to say anymore.

It had always been like this. Perhaps it was thanks to their long involvement with each other – they practically grew up together – that they often found themselves enjoying the comfortable silence just like this. There was no need to speak too much; no need to explain too much.

And there was this good trust between them that never failed to assure them just by having each other by their side.

Aoba had wanted to find a place where he could spend some alone time to clear his messed up thoughts. But as he closed his eyes, feeling Koujaku’s presence beside him, he thought that perhaps this could work too. Because then he wouldn’t feel alone, and he’d be able to be of company for Koujaku especially knowing that Koujaku would never asked, even when that was all he ever needed.

 


	43. Rain; Koujaku x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rainy days weren't so bad if you have the right company.

He woke up to the rain pattering against the window. It was when the dark sky was lit up by lightning that he noticed that they’d slept through a night of possibly horrible thunderstorms. The air was chilly, the wind cold and when he rolled out of bed after a tough struggle trying to slip himself out of Koujaku’s embrace, he immediately located a shirt near the bed, wrapping it around himself and walking towards the window.

As expected, it was raining cats and dogs and even though it was already seven in the morning the scene outside the window looked nothing like one: the streets were almost empty besides for a few residents who were trying to run themselves to shelter; the roads damped and quiet. Aoba let out a soft sigh; it’d be a real challenge to get himself out for work today.

He heard Koujaku shuffle behind him, looking back just in time to see him sitting up on the bed, rubbing one eye with his knuckles before he shot a gentle smile at Aoba’s direction.

“Good morning,” he mumbled, sleepiness still thick in his voice.

Returning his smile, Aoba lifted a beam and walked towards him, settling himself right by his side before he leaned in and kissed him on the cheek.

“Morning,” he mumbled against his skin.

One firm pull later and Aoba found himself tumbling into Koujaku’s warm embrace, positioning himself in between Koujaku’s legs and before he could send a pout at Koujaku’s direction the older man had pressed his cheek against his, nuzzling and smiling contentedly at the same time.

“The weather is so nice this morning I don’t feel like leaving this house at all,” Koujaku said, voice still filled with bleariness.

“You could pass working today but I can’t,” Aoba scowled. “I’m supposed to get ready now, by the way.”

He hoped the hint was good enough for Koujaku to let him go so he wouldn’t need to risk another rushing-for-work scenario. Despite acknowledging the signal, Koujaku continued holding onto him, kissing him on the neck before he hugged him tighter, almost suffocating him.

“H-hey…” Aoba retorted. The weather was cold; he was literally freezing when he woke up. But Koujaku’s embrace was warm and comfortable and he was no longer sure if he wanted to leave as what he intended to anymore.

“I might really think of taking a day off today but,” Koujaku said, pausing just to gaze out of the window. “I don’t think this should stop me.”

Aoba chuckled. “Well, if we don’t start getting ready now we’ll probably really need to pass for the day.”

Joining Aoba’s bright laughter, Koujaku released him at long last, giving him a pat on the head before he left the bed and paced straight into the bathroom.

The air was freezing cold, he shivered as soon as the warmth left him. He wished he’d suggested a few more moments of cuddling before he chased him off.

It was an hour later when both of them found themselves standing at the doorway, glancing up at the sky with concern written all over their faces.

“It’s not going to turn better in at least a few hours’ time,” Koujaku commented. Then, turning around to smile at Aoba, he pushed one of the umbrellas he’d been holding into the other’s hand. “Try not to get too wet.”

“I say the same to you,” Aoba pouted, taking the umbrella from Koujaku at the same time. “Will you be fine?”

“Me? Haha, I’ll be more than fine,” Koujaku said. “I’d need to find a place with good shelter but I doubt business would be good anyway.”

“Oh, really? I’m pretty sure your fans would do  _anything_  to meet you,” Aoba’s voice was purposely heightened, immediately drawing a chuckle out of Koujaku.

“Now, now, don’t be jealous at a time like this,” Koujaku ruffled him on the hair.

“I’m.. not really,” Aoba looked away. He’d often blurted things out of his own conscious and whenever he’d done that the regrets that pooled within him thrust guilt into every one of his veins. He could do nothing but retreat. Koujaku obviously noticed that as well. As soon as he averted eye contact with him, he crouched, coming just at the same eye level with Aoba before he tilted his chin and kissed him softly on the lips.

“Stay safe. See you back home.”

Aoba nodded, flustered by the sudden intimation. “You too.”

He wished they had agreed to pass work for this day instead.

The walk to Heibon wasn’t a tough one. Despite the ferocious wind that had almost threatened to blow his umbrella away, he’d managed to keep himself dry at most places. The shift was quiet; the time moved incredibly slow. He couldn’t help but keep glancing at his Coil, wasn’t even sure what he was expecting, wasn’t even sure if he was checking the time or if he was waiting for a message. There was this weird jumpiness within him that he couldn’t suppress. He almost sprinted out of the shop if the realization that he didn’t even know where Koujaku was hadn’t stopped him.

“Haa..” He slumped, chin pressing against the table as he stared blankly into space. The _tick tock, tick tock_  sound of one antique wall clock reverberated around the space and all that he could hear was noisy, splattering sounds of rainwater hitting the window, with occasional commotion of people running across the streets.

Koujaku was right, it’d take a few hours for the rain to stop; heck, it’d probably rain for the entire day now.

“Aoba, you’re sighing a lot today.” Ren jumped onto the counter from his basket, placing his front paw on Aoba’s head as if trying to calm him down.

“Yeah…”

“Must be the weather.”

Aoba looked up at Ren’s words, a face of inquisitive.

“Is the weather affecting your mood, Aoba?” Ren asked, noticing the question.

“…maybe,” Aoba mumbled. It wasn’t like he disliked rainy days but there was just something with the mood a rainy day gave out that had drown him into a deep state of reflection. It was something to do with the tranquillity he was in; something that’d evoked a thought – a memory – that was once buried deep within him, spurting it right out of his head and bringing it on the surface.

“It’s three hours to five,” Ren responded, now settling himself comfortably beside Aoba.

“Yeah… I know.”

He didn’t know where Koujaku was; he didn’t ask where Koujaku was. The exchange of “see you back home” earlier this morning should’ve served as an instruction good enough for them to anticipate their next step. But as he made his way out of the shop, umbrella up and all ready to sprint, he halted, suddenly feeling himself losing control of his legs.

“Aoba?” Ren poked his head out of his bag, looking concernedly at Aoba when Aoba smiled at him.

“Ren, let’s walk for a bit before he head home, alright?”

Aoba could do whatever he wanted and Ren would never stop him. The rain wasn’t as bad as how it was anymore anyway; it was less heavy, wasn’t one that would trigger a sickness out of him even if he was to walk in the rain without shelter.

“Where are you planning to go, Aoba?” Ren asked.

“Hmm, just a bit.”

He didn’t know where he wanted to go. His mere intention was simply to walk mindlessly under the rain and just head to wherever his legs were bringing him.

He turned several corners, finding himself in more vacant streets before he came to a stop in one he was familiar with. The Benishigure members were nowhere to be seen today; the rain must’ve interfered their operations as well. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting either. In fact, he should head home before the rain turned heavy again. He was about to do just that when he caught sight of a hint of red from the corner of his eyes, freezing every one of his nerves that when he turned so abruptly just like that he almost fell headfirst into the puddle of water in front of him.

From the end of the street was Koujaku, his red-coloured umbrella up, the colour of his kimono ever-so striking. It was no wonder Aoba could make him out even through the drizzling of the rain.

He almost felt like a ray of hope crushing its way through the thick mist and making its way towards Aoba.

“Thought we’re supposed to meet at home,” Koujaku teased the moment he stepped right in front of him. When Aoba gaped at him, his grin widened, pinching Aoba on the nose before he took the umbrella off Aoba’s hand, closed it, and pulled Aoba into the shelter of his umbrella.

“Since we’re both here might as well share one, right?”

Sometimes he never knew what his hunch was leading him; sometimes he never knew why he did things the way he did. But most of the time, he knew that it was stemmed from the need to endear, of concern, and of course, to find his way to what he loved.

In this case, Koujaku.

 


	44. Recap; Koujaku x Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief overview of Koujaku and Noiz's relationship in Noiz POV.

He still remembered how it felt to be  _alone_. 

The world was nothing but him, him and him. There was only darkness, and very limited sounds that he wouldn’t catch if he was to lose focus for even one second. 

It was a lonely world. A world he never wanted to revisit again. 

When he came to Midorijima, the loneliness wasn’t as bad as how it felt when he was back in his own small castle. But the feeling still lingered. Even though he’d tried to get used to it, there was no way he could get rid of how his heart squeezed from beneath his chest when he saw others being surrounded by cheerful companions; when they were so genuinely happy it felt almost impossible. He thought these happiness never belonged to him, that he should stop yearning for it and that he should live with what he had. He wanted to believe that this was what destiny had in store for him. He was _afraid_  to yearn for more.

Across time, he started to believe that the concept of happiness, of feeling belonged was a concept too far-fetched for him. And the only way to stop himself from continue seeking for it was to distance himself from it. 

But meeting Koujaku was a mistake. 

When he first met him, Koujaku gave him a sort of intensity from within that he didn’t know existed. At first, he thought it was an interesting encounter. Koujaku was so easy to read; it only took one simple step to draw a huge reaction out of him. He thought it was interesting for someone to be able to portray such intense emotions simply from something so simple. He wondered how Koujaku did it. 

But yet, at the same time, he also noticed that even though Koujaku had pretty much put his emotions on the surface, there was still…  _something else_  that Noiz couldn’t locate. There was  _something else_  that had yet to surface; and that  _something else_  might be a turning point for how he was to view Koujaku as a person.

Koujaku was interesting, he concluded. For a person who found difficulties expressing himself, Noiz thought that Koujaku might be more than what he thought he was – to be able to express himself in such an unrestrained way was one thing; but to be able to suppress what he  _really_  felt within him despite having such huge emotional waves was what  _really_  amused Noiz.

So he wanted to probe on it. He wanted to push Koujaku to the limit; to see how much he could take until he spilled even the most hidden part of him out at him. 

He had a plan – a trial plan. He wasn’t sure if it would work but he wanted to try it nevertheless. The only thing he didn’t expect was how  _he_  himself was affected by this seemingly flawless plan of his.

“Boo!”He felt his heartbeats gaining speed, almost feeling it jumping out of his chest as he froze, suddenly unsure of what he should do, how he should react.

“Sorry, that was too loud?” 

He was already more than familiar with this voice. This very voice which had rang so loudly in his ears when he first heard it, the same voice which had rolled straight into his heart when they crossed the thin, fine line that they thought never existed.

He closed his eyes, still trying to suit himself back into reality. When the silence stretched, Koujaku became worried instead as he moved to sit right in front of him, visible scrutinizing on Noiz’s expression before he started,

“I’m sorry, did I scare you?”

Noiz opened his eyes. When their eyes met, Noiz gave out an instinctive smile of relief, which did nothing but causing Koujaku to stagger slightly, eyes brightening as he noticed the unexpected response from the nineteen-year-old.

“You did,” Noiz said slowly, eyes still fixed on Koujaku’s fiery red ones. “You surprised me in a lot of ways.”

Koujaku took a while to understand what exactly Noiz was implying. And when he did, he broke into a gentle smile, a smile that was once very much foreign to Noiz, as he ruffled Noiz on the hair.

“Who would’ve thought the cold and annoying Rhyme player would fall for a loud and irritating Rib player, huh?” 

It wasn’t something Koujaku believed himself. There were occasions when he would just lay in his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling and wondering if everything was a dream. 

Noiz’s presence was always very vague. If he was to blink at the wrong time, he’d lose sight of him and before he knew it, he’d be faced with a truth about the young man that he thought he would have enough courage to face. But Noiz was so, so much more than an annoying Rhyme player. 

Noiz was nineteen, but he was also an abandoned child, a child who hadn’t gotten a chance to learn a lot about the world, let alone emotions. 

Sometimes, Koujaku felt as if his entire existence was a contradiction to Noiz’s, that they weren’t supposed to come this close after all. Sometimes, he even wondered if his existence would only push Noiz to the wrong direction. But when he turned and caught sight of Noiz’s genuine behaviors – his sleeping face, his pout when he tasted something weird, and his small frown when he was faced with something he couldn’t understand – he thought that perhaps it was the opposite after all.Simply because Koujaku possessed these huge wave of emotions that he owned the qualification to  _tell_ Noiz how it actually felt having to feel so much at one time. 

Noiz might not be able to understand everything all in once, but Koujaku wasn’t worried in the slightest.They had time. Noiz was only nineteen. He had the entire world waiting for him. Koujaku might not be the best tutor, but he was genuine. 

And Noiz could sense it, loud and clear, whenever he was faced with the once Rib team leader.And there was no other way to learn emotions better than being able to directly _feel_  them.      

 


	45. Pain; Koujaku x Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pain was the only thing he couldn't feel; but sometimes, pain was all he felt.

He couldn’t quite believe it when he first found out that Noiz couldn’t feel pain; and it bewildered him even further when he realized that pain wasn’t the only thing Noiz couldn’t feel – but sensations and emotions as a whole.

He thought it was a lie – or an excuse to escape reality, whichever worked for him – that Noiz used to conceal the fact that he couldn’t care less about others, let alone their feelings. But of the various occurrences that Koujaku came to observe, he noticed that the nineteen-year-old wasn’t lying at all, even though he’d portrayed an obvious sense of distrust when he broke the news to Koujaku one night after Koujaku had accidentally gone too rough on him during their lovemaking, which Koujaku resent and apologized later. Noiz’s lacked of expression had always been a huge concern to Koujaku. He told himself that it could be due to Noiz’s inability to express himself better, and that Noiz had this big trust issue that had led to this.

He told himself that Noiz would eventually open up to him soon; he would, in due course, show him more expressions, he’d be able to convey himself better.

But he didn’t know that Noiz wasn’t able to do  _any_  of those. Because he couldn’t, he was born as such.

“Tell me if it hurts,” Koujaku said, an order he deemed insignificant as Noiz shrugged, a gesture that told Koujaku that he shared his opinion. Regardless, he inhaled deeply, then carefully plucking on the piercings that were on Noiz’s ear, taking them off one by one.

“Does it hurt?” he asked again, in which Noiz responded with a light shook of head. It was an answer he’d expected, but it wasn’t an answer he wanted. He tried tugging harder, longing to draw some reaction out of Noiz. He had his doubts, and he was  _really_ starting to believe that Noiz was serious about not being able to feel  _at all_. But there was still a faint hint of hope sitting on his heart, and he wanted so much for it to grow livelier and crush his doubts into dust.

But all Noiz did was staring into space, allowing Koujaku to do whatever he wanted to his piercings before he turned around, curious at the sudden lack of reaction.

“What?” he asked. It was a tone so very emotionless, a tone that Koujaku was so very familiar with, but a tone that the older man so very disliked.

“Don’t you feel  _anything_  at all?” Koujaku asked again. He held the metal studs he’d took off from Noiz’s ears loosely in his hand, eyes staring penetratingly into Noiz’s, attempting to sense even the slightest hint of emotions in them.

“A nudge, maybe. But that’s about it.”

He scowled. Putting the metal studs aside, he raised a hand to caress Noiz’s ear shell, rubbing the reddened spot with his thumb when Noiz added his own hand on top of Koujaku’s.

“I told you before,” he reaffirmed. “I can’t feel pain. All I can feel is a numb sensation, as if there’s something blocking my skin, preventing me from being able to directly feel the impact, whatever it is.”

Koujaku knew that Noiz was trying to describe how he felt to him. It must be tough, considering he never knew how exactly pain felt like in the first place. But judging from the tone he was using, it didn’t seem like he cared either. It hurt Koujaku, and he hoped Noiz could at least feel how he was feeling like, perhaps at least once.

“Tell me how you feel inside now.” With that thought, he took Noiz’s hand in his and entwined their fingers. “You  _do_  feel something, right?”

Noiz stared dazedly at him for a few moments before he tilted his head, staring at the ceiling then back at Koujaku again.

“I don’t feel a lot at most times,” he started, being completely upfront. “I’m not interested with a lot of things.”

That was a truth Koujaku knew. He’d long acknowledged that things that were able to catch Noiz’s interest were like rare gems. He rarely conveyed interest, rarely wanting to know more, and most of the time, he found himself yearning to leave the scene as fast as he could instead of spending more time dwelling with things that he knew won’t be any beneficial to him.

He expressed very well in  _that_  way.

“Ah,” Noiz suddenly said, a small smirk gradually making its way to his feature. “But I do feel a bit more when it comes to you, though.”

“Huh?” Now that caught Koujaku’s attention, also effectively distracting him from his own inner contradictions. “Tell me about it.”

“Do you remember the first time we met?”

He would never forget about it. And so he nodded, suddenly reminding himself of the familiar combat he once had with Noiz in a very small space that was Aoba’s room.

“I felt an urge to win,” Noiz continued.

“Isn’t that what you always feel?”

“I don’t,” Noiz responded. “Because I already know I’ll win.”

Koujaku laughed. “That’s pretty cocky of you, isn’t it?”

“There’s no reason to deny the truth when you know it’s one.”

Well, Noiz had a point there. But he was still not hitting the point Koujaku was more interested with.

“So you think I’m a tough opponent?” he speculated, feeling a sense of triumph within him when Noiz lowered his head with a scowl in between his eyebrow, seemingly trying to sort out his own thoughts.

“In a way, yes,” he said. Instantly, Koujaku could sense how unsure he was – and he wasn’t surprised at all. For a person who hadn’t gotten the chance to understand about emotions in general, it was perfectly normal for them to get confused over the sudden change of feelings they felt within them.

“I thought you were different, very unlike the others I used to face.”

Was it because of his extreme temper? Koujaku wondered. Because no matter how aggressive the others could be, there was no way they’d match Koujaku’s trademark, quick-to-anger personality.

“I  _am_  different,” he probed more. “I am a Rib player after all.”

A Rib player was all about physique, about strength, about action. But Noiz was a Rhyme player; and a Rhyme player was everything opposite of what a Rib player should be.

“Hmmm,” Noiz considered again. It probably wasn’t something that he could figure out so easily. And Koujaku didn’t want to force him either. He might be determined to find out the answer for himself now but the answer can wait. He had time to gain more experiences in this sense, there was no need to rush.

So Koujaku pinched on his earlobe, pressing the thin flesh in between his fingers when Noiz gave him an inquisitive look.

“Try and see if you can feel any pain,” Koujaku said, prodding harder on his ear.

Noiz  _chuckled_ , which did nothing but stopping Koujaku from whatever he was doing as he stared, dumbstruck, at the unexpected response.

“You’re quite a forceful man, aren’t you?” Noiz commented. Giving out a sigh, he brushed Koujaku’s hand away and leaned forward instead, pressing his hands at both of Koujaku’s sides.

“There’s no need to try too hard. What’s the truth is the truth. It’s a fact that I can’t feel physical pain and there’s no way I can change that,” he explained. “But I  _can_  feel emotional pain. And that’s why you are different.”

Koujaku thought he hadn’t figured the answer out, but it seemed like he’d taken the young man too lightly. He’d probably figured it out since he first felt it.

Noiz’s sensations were dull, but that didn’t mean he was senseless.

“A Rib player is all about physical action,” Noiz started, noticing the confusion on Koujaku’s face. He held a hand up, taking strands of Koujaku’s dropping hair into his hand and swirling the tips with his finger. “A Rhyme player is all about brains,” he continued, his voice dropped an octave lower. Koujaku didn’t even have the time to feel insulted when Noiz released his hair and brushed his bangs aside instead, revealing the tattoo on his face. “It’s not hard to tell how much physical pain you’d gone through to be able to endure the ones that came after. And that,” he paused, straightening himself up and towering over Koujaku. In that instance, Koujaku felt an intimidating sense of dominance that had him gulping at Noiz, who was  _still_  giving him a blank, almost penetrating stare when a small, devilish smirk formed on his face. “… pains me.”

Noiz might not be able to feel pain, but he was smart; perhaps way too clever for his own good. He didn’t need pity – he’d emphasized on that when he first told Koujaku about his disability. He didn’t need help. He could learn about  _pain_  simply by observing.

And for all Koujaku knew, pain was all he felt when he exposed his past, inerasable scars right in front of him. Just like how he did now.

 


	46. Farewell; Mizuki x Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taking place after re:code GE, Desire bids his final farewell to Mizuki.

“We’ll be leaving now!”

“Careful on your way back!”

Bidding the last team member farewell, Mizuki smiled as he placed the last of the beer bottle back onto the shelves. Ever since the Platinum Jail incident, Black Needle had slowly regained its usual joviality. Even though some of the Rib members were still hospitalized and unconscious, most of them had regained their usual selves as they stopped by every so frequent in the shop to help Mizuki out.

It had been a month; but Mizuki hadn’t figured out a solution, or rather, a decision as to how he should proceed from now on.

The Platinum Jail incident was a life-changing event. He was grateful for his own willpower; grateful for possessing enough determination to remain sane.

But above all, he was grateful to crack what had been troubling him for the most of his life.

Dry Juice had always been his family. Now that his ‘family’ had gone their own ways, it was time for him to seek for another family now.

Taking a final look at his shop, he gave out another smile before he offed the lights and opened the door that led to the ever so familiar Midorijima streets, when the smile was instantly turned upside down the moment he stepped out of the shop.

It was raining cats and dogs. Of all days, he had to forget his umbrella today.

Sighing, he was about to retreat back to his shop, intending to wait for the rain to pass when a shadow above him hindered his intention.

“Oh.” He gave out a bright smile again once he noticed who the man standing right next to him was. “It’s you.”

The man merely let out a chuckle before he pointed his chin at the streets.

“I knew you’d forget this.”

Smiling gawkily, Mizuki stepped under the shelter of the umbrella as both of them stepped out to the rain.

It was mere silence at first, the only sounds being the raindrops against their umbrella and the storms that they could hear from a distance away. Mizuki wasn’t used to this kind of silence, especially not when he was in the company of  _this man_.

“Hey,” he called out, no longer able to sustain the awkward silence. “Which are you? Aoba? Or…” The man gave him a sideway glance, causing him to swallow down his throat before he continued. “… _him_?”

Then, he saw a smirk. Ah, this was…

“What do you think?”

In the past, he’d find himself momentarily astonished, probably even stopping his footsteps just to have another good look at the other man, to make sure that he was real. But it had been a month, and before he knew it, he found himself not only unsurprised, but even a bit… relieved to see the presence of this man before him.

Sometimes he felt as if he had known this person longer than he thought. Maybe because he was the first person who’d known him even before he knew Aoba. Or maybe because he was the closest person to him besides Aoba to even deserve an actual face-to-face interaction.

“It’s been a while,” he responded. “I thought you’d disappeared.”

Desire simply gave out another smirk.

They turned another corner. Usually it’d take about half an hour to reach Mizuki’s house from his shop but thanks to the rain today, it was another fifteen minutes more until Mizuki’s house came into view.

“Coming in?” Mizuki said as he took his shoes off and wiped the water off his jacket.

“I’ll pass.”

Surprised, he stopped whatever he was doing and stared bewilderedly at Desire. He was still standing in the rain, umbrella up and giving Mizuki a kind of expression that Mizuki couldn’t see properly.

“You sure?”

He saw Desire nodding. It took another while before Mizuki gave out a sigh as he slipped back into his shoes and stepped into the rain again.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Desire frowned, immediately grabbing Mizuki to stand with him under the umbrella as soon as he saw what Mizuki was doing.

“I thought I should keep you company for a while. Since you went all the way to send me back.”

He expected another smirk, another tease, or even another frown. But instead, Desire merely stood, expressionless, as he stared up at the sky. Rain was still pouring down and it didn’t seem like it was going to stop anytime soon.

“He—“ Mizuki started, but his words were immediately cut short when Desire pushed the umbrella into his hands and ran out into the rain.

“Oi!”

He didn’t even take his time to think about it when he chased after Desire. It was weird. When they were in Platinum Jail, Desire always portrayed a sense of confidence, assertiveness, forcefulness, that had effectively drove people out of the way. They were afraid of him – or rather,  _Scrap_  – and the attitude he possessed had triggered hatred, if not wrath, of many. But the Desire now was different. Sure, he still had this defiant smirk on his face, his eyes still glistened with gold so sharp one would easily be absorbed into it if they were to stare too long. And his deadliest weapon – his voice – was still firm, heavy, deep, and sometimes, slightly hostile.

The Desire Mizuki was dealing with now, though, was far from everything he remembered him to be. Especially the way he looked at him – it possessed a new kind of emotion that Mizuki never would label on him. Instead of Desire being Desire, Mizuki – his heart skipped a beat when the realization hit him – realized that he was being more…  _Aoba_  now.

He found him in an alley, where he leaned against the wall, still staring at the sky and only turned to look at Mizuki when he heard his footsteps approaching him.

“You’re all wet,” Mizuki said, for a lack of better things to say.

_Laugh at me. Tell me how stupid I am for stating the obvious. Hit me._

But Desire merely smirked.

“What’s wrong with you?” Mizuki finally asked. He was acting weird, he definitely was.

“Hey,” Desire said, straightening himself up before he walked towards Mizuki. “Which do you prefer? Aoba or me?”

“What?”

He heard him, but what he couldn’t comprehend was the rationale behind the question. What was he trying to ask?

And Desire obviously knew that he heard him as well, because all he did after he’d thrown him that question was staring at him, eyes still glimmering gold but now, Mizuki could clearly make out what was behind those eyes. It was  _fear_.

“I told you before,” Mizuki started after realizing that Desire wasn’t going to do anything until he heard his answer. “I don’t mind either you or Aoba. Both of you are the same.”

For a few seconds, they merely stared at each other. Then, he felt shiver running down his spine. This felt familiar. The only time Desire had ever looked at him like this was when he was about to scrap him. He’d inch so close towards him, give him a smirk so terrifying that’d effectively stopped all of Mizuki’s actions, and before he knew it, he’d hear his voice, deep and cold, right beside his ears.

_I’m going to destroy you._

“If that’s fine with you,” Desire said. Mizuki could literally feel the pressure leaving him when he heard his voice this time. It was still low, but the coldness was less pronounced now.

“Sooner or later,” Desire continued, stepping a step back and tucking his hands into his hoodie’s pockets. “Reason and I will become one. We’ll become the real Aoba.”

Oh, so that was why Desire was so much softer now; that was also why Aoba was more confident, even assertive in his actions.

“ _I might be under the influence of ‘that guy’.”_

Aoba once told him. At that point in time, Mizuki couldn’t understand what Aoba was trying to say. But now that Desire had spilled the beans at him, he found himself unable to brush the truth off his head.

“You’ll disappear?” he asked slowly, just to make sure.

“Technically, I’ll still be here,” Desire replied as he kicked an empty can into a corner. “We’ll just become one. I’ll be part of Aoba, we’ll be balanced out.”

“Oh.”

He didn’t know what else he should say. He’d told Aoba that he didn’t mind either. But when he thought about how he’d missed Desire’s usual teases, Desire fooling around with him, Desire’s abrupt actions that  _always_  caught him off guard…

Desire.

“You’ll still see me in him,” Desire continued. “Or maybe you’ve already started seeing me in him.”

He was right. Sometimes when Mizuki talked to Aoba, he felt as if he was speaking to Desire. It was bound to happen, sooner or later.

“I just thought I should forewarn you. I won’t be coming out so frequently now so that Aoba can balance himself up better.”

“Oh.”

He really didn’t know what to say, what the right thing to say was. He would miss Desire, definitely. But Desire was, as he had put it, part of Aoba. And Aoba was a friend – an important friend.

Nothing would change.

Of course nothing would change.

As he stood frozen on the same spot, Desire came up to him and slung a hand around his neck, pulling his head down so that they were on the same eye level.

“What’s with that face?” he grinned.

“N-nothing!” Mizuki struggled out of his grasp frantically.

“Miss me?”

He’d miss  _this_.

“Don’t worry. Like I said, it’s not like I’ll disappear completely. I’ll coexist with Aoba. That’s all.”

Then, the next thing that happened was so breathtaking it made Mizuki stop breathing for two seconds.

“Thanks for accepting me.”

He would never forget the warmth he felt on his lips that day. The warmth that Desire had once regarded it to be an ‘accident’.

 


	47. Perfect Child; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t care what they think, to me, you are perfect”.   
> Aoba confronting Noiz's parents about the perfect way to educate their child.

The dining table was enveloped in a suffocating air. Every bite he took felt as if he was swallowing rubber. Aoba looked up from his plate, taking a quick glimpse at the end of the table before he tilted his head slightly to look at Noiz’s face. Noiz was wearing an unconcerned profile as usual, eyes cold and seemingly impassive towards everything that was happening around him. Aoba swallowed down his throat, picking up the fork and knife again and continued devouring his steak, which tasted like nothing but a mouthful of elastic flesh at the moment.

“It’s good to have you here for dinner with us.”

Noiz’s mother broke the silence. Lifting his head up again, he returned her gentle, obviously well-trained smile with a weak one of his own.

“No, no, thank you for having us for dinner.”

Noiz’s mother nodded lightly, then returning to drink her soup. The short disturb of silence only intensified the rigid atmosphere in the room.

“What is your plan for the upcoming long holiday you took?”

The father’s voice almost caused Aoba to drop his cutlery but he quickly looked at Noiz, who was wiping his mouth with a napkin before he returned his attention to his father, as poker-faced as ever.

“As written in the leave form, I’m going out of the country.” Giving Aoba a quick look, he managed a smile then continued. “With him.”

Aoba wished his nerves wouldn’t betray him right now because all he really wanted was to look up from his plate and give his father a confident nod as a sign of support for Noiz. Before he could do just that, Noiz’s father gave out what sounded like an aggravated hum.

“Make sure you depart as quiet as you could.” There was no mistaking the fury in his voice, even though it was obvious that he was trying to keep it in control. “I don’t want more gossips around.”

Aoba could only imagine how infuriated Noiz was now, even _he_ himself was having problems suppressing his stirring nerves.

“I’m leaving the normal way, if that’s what you considered as being ‘quiet’.”

Aoba could feel the the dissatisfaction of the father even from a mile away.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve closed an eye to your unreasonable action. At the very least, you should know how to keep your family name clean.”

Noiz was obviously trying hard to suppress the urge to stand for himself even though Aoba knew that he had every intention to do so. He’d told Aoba how enduring a heat in the moment could save him a lot of trouble and honestly, that was one thing Aoba had to applaud him for.

He went back to his food, trying to block the voice out instead and - for once - attempting to actually taste the meat in his mouth. He could vaguely make out what his father was telling Noiz - all the usual lectures about how to uphold his own family name and how to make them proud and how to listen to them for once.

He told Noiz - and himself - that he was proud of Noiz to be able to consider their positions in a long term; that was why he sometimes felt helpless when he saw Noiz being put under such a negative light as if everything was his and only _his_ fault.

He told himself that he’d never be able to be as composed as Noiz would if he was to be put in Noiz’s position.

And now, it was a real test to his words.

He could physically feel his fingers shaking as he gripped the premium material of his knife _hard_. He could feel his nerves having every ounce of intention to jump at Noiz’s father. And he could even feel the blood rushing up to his head, the words inching closer from his throat to his tongue. He was _so close_ to losing his calm.

“– should learn better how to compensate for you faults for putting us in such an unpleasant position when you escaped from–”

“He did nothing wrong.”

He was literally _growling_ under his breath. The entire room turned silent. The ticking of the clock along with the quiet breeze from outside the window were the only sounds audible in the space. Aoba knew immediately that he’d gone over his own limit when the blurted the few words out. But what done was done and he had no intention at all to take it back. Instead, he looked up, completely abandoning his cutlery before he shot a stern glare at Noiz’s parents.

“As a parent, you conveniently ignored your son’s condition when he was completely incapable of searching help for his own. As a parent, you labeled your son as being ‘abnormal’, ‘a family shame’, when he had little to know knowledge of what he did wrong. As a parent, you–”

“Aoba.”

He left his words hanging in midair. He knew he’d overdone it but there was no way for him to back off anymore. Noiz might be able to take it - it was how he was raised anyway - but _he_ couldn’t and if no one was going to tell the parents how _wrong_ they were from the very start, _he_ would.

“Ah, I think it should be okay to serve the desserts now, right?” Theo said out of a sudden, his existence forgotten until now. He clicked his fingers at a nearby maid, who then bowed and walked out of the room. They suffered for another few seconds of awkward silence before the same maid, accompanied by a few others, reappeared from the door and started to serve their final course.

“Aoba-san, I’ve heard about one dessert in your hometown that I really want to try.” Theo’s voice was still bright and gaudy, an endeavor to lift the mood in the room up. When the maid served his food, Aoba’s eyes brightened. He’d missed this, he certainly did.

“What do you call this again? _Daifuku_?” Theo continued, scrutinizing the three pieces of soft-looking food on his plate before he flashed a big grin at Aoba.

“Y-yeah, it’s _Daifuku_ ,” Aoba responded. He had three of them to himself, two in white and one in pink and the sight itself already told him how delicious this would be. “Do you… make this? From scratch?”

“Oh, no, no, not me! Our chef did. But I have to admit that I was the one who gave him the recipe.”

Theo must’ve done this with Aoba in mind, Aoba knew that much. He must’ve noticed how suffocating it’d be to be placed in a room with both of his parents.

“Try them out, Aoba-san! I’d love to hear your opinion!”

Aoba picked his fork up, experimentally poking on the soft texture of the white-colored _Daifuku_ before he sank his fork into it, lifting it up and taking the food in with one bite.

“How is it?” Theo asked excitedly.

His mouth was too full to speak but this was the taste that he’d missed so much ever since he’d tried it out during one of the summer festivals he’d attended in Midorijima with his friends. Giving Theo a thumb-up instead, Theo’s smile widened, digging into his food in no time.

The dinner didn’t start in a positive note, but it ended with a less negative one; and that was all thanks to Theo’s - Noiz’s _family_ \- thoughtfulness towards them.

When they were finally done with dessert, the parents had the maids to escort them out while they retreated back into the house. Noiz dismissed them with one hand, leaving both him, Aoba and Theo alone at the front gate.

“I’m so sorry for the unpleasantness, Brother,” Theo immediately apologized. “Father can be too… strict at times.”

Noiz’s indifferent feature was lifted the moment Theo ended his words. Giving him a small smile instead, he shook his head.

“It’s fine. It’s not hard to figure them out anyway. I’m used to this.”

He could see Aoba frowning from the corner of his eyes. Theo obviously saw it too. Smiling bitterly at Aoba, he turned to talk to him instead.

“Thank you for standing up for Brother, I couldn’t even help myself to do that.”

“I–”

“Now _someone_ has to think of how to solve this unsettling bond now that he’d breathe fire before filtering through his brain again,” Noiz teased.

He wasn’t entirely wrong. Now that Aoba had done it, he’d need to reevaluate the way he was to interact with Noiz’s parents.

And _he_ was the one who’d insisted to talk things through with them.

“Don’t worry, Aoba-san, I’ll talk to Father and Mother when I have the time,” Theo jumped into Aoba’s rescue. “You had a point there, anyway. I’m sure they’ll understand it sooner or later. Well then, I better not disturb both of you any longer. Goodnight, Brother, Aoba-san.”

Once the door behind them was closed, Noiz picked Aoba’s hand up, intertwined their fingers as the made their way out of the big mansion towards the direction of their car.

“That’s a very daring act back there,” Noiz said, gaze fixed at the gate while they walked.

“I can’t stand how how your father humiliated you when you did absolutely nothing wrong at all,” Aoba defended. “Did you grow up with this? Did you have to hear all of these even when you were locked in the room?”

“That’s why I decided to leave,” Noiz said in a casual manner, very like the tone Aoba was so used to hear. “There’s no point staying in a place where you know you’re not ready for it yet.”

“Not ready? No one would ever be ready for that,” Aoba was starting to find the nerves returning to his veins now. He grabbed Noiz’s hand firmer, scowled deeper, and spoke with a sterner voice. “Your parents don’t see you as their son - you’re just their…” he paused, trying to find the right word. “… their tool.”

He remembered how Noiz had labeled himself as such when he first knew him. Now that he witnessed the proof of the reason for his initial impression back then, he can’t help but feeling infuriated. This was definitely not the right way to raise a child. If Noiz hadn’t escaped, who knows how he’d turn out to be?

“I know that, and I always thought it was supposed to be like that,” Noiz confirmed. “I thought it was how human relationship works - you use each other for your own benefit and nothing else.” Slowing down his pace, he turned his head to look at Aoba, who was still deep in his thought. “But you told me it’s not the right way to think.”

“Of course I have to tell you that!” Aoba exclaimed. “This is wrong. No one is supposed to treat others like tools. It’s just… hurtful. I don’t care what they think, to me, you’re perfect, and you’re no way a tool. You have so much to show - you’re talented, smart, good-looking, you’re just… perfect.”

Noiz chuckled then, a response Aoba never expected.

“So I’m only hearing this from you now when you refused to tell me when we’re in bed?”

“H-huh…” Aoba stopped before he sent a light punch at Noiz’s arm. “I’m just angry, no parents should treat their son like that.”

Noiz wanted to so much to tell him that _his own parents_ had abandoned him ever since he was young, just like how _his own parents_ had.

But that wasn’t the point now. As they continued moving forward, he told Aoba that that was exactly the reason why he decided to return to Germany, not only for Aoba, but also for his family. He’d come to realize that his family wasn’t the best example for anyone at all; but they’re still his _family_ , and one thing he’d learned about Aoba was to forgive not only his past mistakes, but also to forgive others. Because if one didn’t know that they were doing it wrong, then they weren’t completely at fault.

And that only meant that they still stood a chance for change. If that was one thing Noiz would do for his family, it’d be this.

He was sure that Aoba would support him; he’d seen his answer from how Aoba had insisted him to talk to his family. And probably in the near future, they’d be able to eat dinner in peace, without having to endure the suffocating passive-aggressiveness between each other anymore.

 


	48. One Chance; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noiz & Aoba overcomes distraction with three simple words.

“Stay safe.”

It was a routine; one that they had been extremely familiar with ever since Aoba had move to Germany. Separation was tough, but they weren’t exactly separated anyhow. Non-physically, they were pretty much bonded to each other through the perpetual phone calls and text messages they’d send each other whenever they found the time to. They were never anything too serious, just off-the-cuff “What are you doing?” and “I thought of having something more lavish for tonight’s dinner” conversations that were deemed more than normal for any other living couple. But eventually, Aoba noticed that the speed of returned messages slowed down across time; in due course, a minute turned into ten minutes and then into an hour and it started to worry him if Noiz had started to find him annoying for sending him futile texts like that. With Ren’s assurance, he brushed the thought off, telling himself that Noiz had been doing the same to him as well and it wasn’t possible for Noiz to get worn-out over him when he’d made sure to overtly whisper sweet nothings into his ear every night when they shared each other’s presence.

It didn’t need to take too long for him to finally crack the shell of the mystery when he pulled Noiz into his bedroom two weeks after their stay-together in Germany just to have Noiz smirking puckishly at him.

“It’s not what you think it is,” Aoba pouted, then giving out a loud cough to distract whatever naughty thoughts that’d bloomed in Noiz’s head the moment he took a rougher initiative. “Tell me, honestly – am I disturbing you when you’re working?”

Noiz quirked a confused eyebrow. Tilting his head sideway to gaze at the ceiling, he gave Aoba’s question a momentary contemplation before he answered, still with the smirk on his face.

“How do you disturb me when you aren’t even by my side?”

He knew there were different implications between those lines of Noiz’s but he shook his head, flicking a finger against his forehead as he said,

“I mean, with my constant calls and messages, you know…”

Noiz scrutinized Aoba for another few seconds before he let out a smile. “I always feel happy when I receive those from you. It’s not bothersome at all.”

“But you aren’t replying fast—“

“Does it bother you?”

“Oh, no, no, that’s not what I meant! But if having to attend to my messages is hindering your working progress, then I’d feel really bad.”

“Hmm,” Noiz seemed to have finally gotten where Aoba was going with this as he supported his chin with a hand, returning his stare to the ceiling and back at Aoba again before he continued, “Sometimes I get busy so I can’t reply instantly. That’s true.”

“Ah, so I thought.”

“I’m not troubled by it,” Noiz quickly added. “But does it bother you?”

“…A bit, maybe.”

“Do you want me to respond faster the next time?”

“No, that’s not what I meant! I mean, if it starts to disturb you from working, then it’d really bother me.”

“So what do you suggest?” Noiz asked, finally hitting the core of the discussion.

“Perhaps one call and one text message a day?” Aoba proposed, provoking a frown out of Noiz.

“That’s pretty cruel, don’t you think?” Noiz grinned.

“Well, too bad, you have to get used to it then,” Aoba crossed his arms with a frown. “The last thing I want is to become an interference to what’s important to you. You know that.”

“ _You_ are important too.”

“W-well, yeah. But I won’t run away. I’ll always be here. So you go focus and do your own thing. And when you’re done, I’ll be here waiting, okay?”

With persistence as firm as Aoba, Noiz figured he wouldn’t have any place to object either. Nodding as a sign of agreement, he pulled Aoba into his arms, kissing him deeply before they officially started their ‘unofficial pact’ the next day.

***

Having to restrain himself from picking up his Coil and contacting Noiz was a task too impossible for him to achieve. It was only the first day and he’d been finding himself feeling agitated for the most time, eyes unconsciously darting to stare at the screen of his Coil, as if he was expecting it to ring anytime now. By noon, they had used up both of their cards: Aoba had texted Noiz to remind him to check if the egg in his lunch box was cooked and Noiz had texted him back to tell him that it was, a squandered gesture. Then, while Aoba held onto his last card – a call – he wondered if it was fine for him to pick up the Coil and call Noiz just like that, for no particular reason at all.

The thought preoccupied him for one whole hour as he hugged Ren in his arms, eyes staring ardently at the Coil on the coffee table and almost flung Ren violently away when his Coil started ringing, urging him to sit up and grab it.

“Hello?”

“Aoba.” All of a sudden, Noiz’s voice sounded distant yet familiar. He knew it was his mind playing tricks at him but he felt as if he hadn’t been listening to this exact voice for years and he could only let out a relieved smile before he responded,

“Hey, how’s work? Wait, are you busy right now?”

“Kinda,” Noiz replied, eliciting a comforted sigh out of Aoba for refraining himself from calling him earlier. “I’m in a meeting right now.”

“What? Shouldn’t you be concentrating in the meeting then?” Aoba exclaimed.

“Yeah,” Noiz said. A pause. “I should.”

“Then go,” Aoba urged. “I’ll wait for you at home.”

“Yeah,” Noiz repeated, seemingly unfocused with the conversation.

“Noiz?” Aoba called out, noticing the discrepancy. “What’s wrong? Everything’s fine here. Go back to your meeting.”

It was a few seconds of silence where Aoba could hear nothing but a buzz of people speaking to each other in what was clearly a meeting room when he heard Noiz let out a soft sigh from over the phone.

“Just call to say I love you. See you back home.”

He couldn’t properly digest the situation, let alone what he just heard as he left his Coil on for one whole minute even after Noiz had put down the call. It was when Ren jumped onto his lap that he returned to himself, shaking his head slightly just to hit the sense back into him.

Releasing a small chuckle, he offed his Coil, hugged Ren and tumbled sideway to lay on the couch.

“Brat.”

The unspoken rule was indeed a challenge of its own; but regardless, they’d find their way to express their affection towards each other again.

And one of those ways that Aoba had thought of was to prepare a good lunchbox for Noiz tomorrow, and to deliver it to him by himself: no calls, no text messages, just them, in a physical sense.

 


	49. Interception; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A response write to kumaharem‘s wonderful NoiAo dj here <3

“Papa? Mama?”

He took small, cautious steps, hugging his bunny plush tight while he looked around, attempting to spot a hint of familiarity but all that he was surrounded with was a piece of vacant white, nothing that suggested cordiality. He was at the verge of tears but he swallowed down his throat, so as to contain the outburst of emotions. He didn’t want to give up, never wanted to stop searching – until he found the place where he truly belonged.

“Theo…?” he let out a final call, then pushing his remaining thoughts off his mind when he finally realized that there wouldn’t be anyone who’d respond to his call, let alone the persons he was searching for.

_Where is everyone?_ he thought, his own heart beating deafeningly in his ears. He was used to be discriminated, to be abandoned, to be laughed at, but he wasn’t used to relentless, overextended stillness like this, as if he had been abandoned by the whole world completely. He didn’t like this at all. He didn’t like the experience of having to deal with the world all by himself. He wasn’t prepared for this.

_Did I do something wrong again?_ He started to contemplate. Every time when he was pushed aside, the only accusations thrown at him consisted of nothing but painting a layer of disobedience all over him; as if _he_ was the only one in fault, and that being not able to feel was an option he’d taken when he was born.

It didn’t even matter to him if someone was to reproach him and laugh at him now. All he needed was… _someone_.

“Ah.”

A long walk later led him to a garden, where he spotted a man, well dressed in a set of neat three-piece suit, seated on one of the benches with his back facing him.

“Papa?” he called out of instinct. Feeling the bubbles of hope budded within him again, he hugged his bunny plush closer to himself, running his way towards the man and halted his steps when the profile of the man came into sight.

“Ah… You’re not.”

Expecting the man to chase him away, he took a few steps back, all ready to make a run when the man held out a hand, urging him to go over.

He was aware of the danger of approaching strangers – his parents had warned him; his teachers had reminded him – but when he looked into the eyes of the man which held a light very similar to his own, he suddenly felt that perhaps this man wasn’t a stranger after all; that this man could be the person he should be looking for instead.

With that thought, he took wary steps towards the man, climbed onto his laps and positioned himself contentedly in between the man’s legs on the bench.

“Mister, what is this place?”

That was the first question he directed at the man. The man merely gave out a small smile before he responded, with a voice so light and carefree that was almost soothing to the heart.

“It’s ours.”

“Do you dislike me being here?” he immediately asked again, feeling the agitation returned to him.

The man took a few seconds this time, almost proving him true when he started, his voice no less casual than the first.

“I’m glad we met.”

He couldn’t quite understand what this man meant by that but he could never understand what a lot of people think about him, about everything else, anyway. Without the intention to dwell further on this, he let himself loose, pressing his chin against the top of the bunny plush head before he continued,

“Then, can I stay here with you?” He was tired, so very exhausted of finding a place to belong anymore. “I… am not needed out there. And since I don’t have to be alone here… with you.”

He didn’t know what made him so sure that this person wouldn’t harm him like any other did. But it was a fact that this person had accepted him and given him comfort when he knew nothing about him. Even if it was just a short-lived bliss, he’d accept it.

The man stayed quiet. For a long time, the only sounds surrounding them were sounds of the wind and sounds of falling leaves. He thought he’d enraged the man, that this temporary sanctuary was too good to be true. Then, the man let out a sigh.

“There may only be one thing that I can teach you,” he started, the warmth in his voice profuse and loud. “Maybe the fact that this world is not as bad as you think it is.”

He couldn’t help but look up at the man, who was wearing a smile so calm it did things to him.

“Maybe you would forget these words right after our meeting.”

The man ran his fingers along his hair, a gentle light illuminated from his bright, lime-green eyes.

“But one day, those words will be said by someone very important to you.”

He couldn’t understand most of what the man was trying to tell him; but he knew that those were important words – words that no one had ever told him before. And all he could do was locking his gaze on the man, feeling the hint of warmth vibrating from him and from within him himself.

Slowly, the man took his hand off his head, placing it on his own hand instead and picking it up, gently caressing it in his own palm.

“That person would hold your hand like I do now and save your life. Until then,” he took a pause, urging him to intertwine their fingers together. “Don’t just let go yet.”

The outburst of emotions was too crushing for him to handle. Feeling himself tumbling and burying his head against the man’s chest, he felt himself wrapped into a comfortable embrace that he knew was the man’s.

“Goodnight. And happy birthday, Wilhelm.”

* * *

“Noiz.”

It took a while for him to come back to his senses. He felt as if he was being pulled into a deep dream, one that he thought wasn’t possible for him to resurface. When he slowly opened his eyes, the first thing he’d caught sight was Aoba’s profile, apprehensions gracing his features.

“Are you okay, Noiz? You’ve been talking in your sleep for a while now. Well, I did enjoy observing but… Just then you sounded like you were sobbing so…”

He quickly sat up, causing Aoba to shift back a little before he found Noiz wide awake, giving him a look so enthralling it caught him completely off guard.

“I think I just had a dream about a dream I had on my birthday when I was a kid.”

“Huh?” If Noiz’s sudden shift of expression wasn’t enough to send a pang of confusion into Aoba, his explanation definitely did the job for him.

“Yeah. It seems like I met a man who looked like my father but actually was not and I as a kid remembered this guy saying strange things but I just can’t recall whatever he said.”

“E-eh..?” He didn’t know where Noiz was going with this now but he listened to him regardless, trying to make sense of things in his own head. “Haha… what. Well, as long as it isn’t something bad, I suppose it’s fine…?”

While he was immersed in his own confusion, he suddenly felt a soft sensation on his lips, opening his eyes wide just to find Noiz tilting his chin up as he lurched towards him for a gentle peck.

He was almost lured into the addictive seduction that Noiz had now perfectly mastered but he snapped himself out just in time to push Noiz away.

“Didn’t we have the deal that I’d be in charge today?” he reprimanded, pushing against Noiz’s chest and frowning at him.

“Didn’t you see I had a sad dream? I need to be comforted urgently. And it’s not like you disliked it anyway.”

He was right, but Aoba wasn’t going to let him do whatever he wanted to do now, not when he was giving him such a suggestive smirk at this very moment.

“This five-year-old just wishes to claim his rightful present a little earlier,” Noiz continued before Aoba could speak, tongue licking his lips playfully before he towered over Aoba again.

“At least let me say it properly first! _And_ , a five-year-old doesn’t make that kind of face!”

Nonetheless, when Noiz pressed another feverish kiss against his lips again, he welcomed him with equal if not more enthusiasm than the one Noiz had been showering him now. It wasn’t part of his plan, but if this could achieve the same objective which was to provide Noiz and himself gratification that belonged solely to themselves – then so be it.

He couldn’t quite remember the dream, let alone what the stranger had said to him while he was in it. But he was sure that he’d experienced the same heart-warming sensations again; not from the stranger, but from _Aoba_.

 


	50. Morning Passion; Noiz/Aoba

The night before was an adventure of its own. It had been a week since Aoba last seen Noiz, the young nineteen-year-old having to grace his presence at a company trip thanks to his superior position, bringing about a half-a-globe distance of separation for them. The moment their presence met each other after that overextended parting, Aoba instantly found himself coming face-to-face with a hungry wolf, one who scooped him up as soon as they were done with dinner, escorting him bridal-style right into the bathroom, and he almost had to scream his lungs out before this said wolf devoured the whole of him with vigour so mercilessly ferocious he thought his boyfriend was fed with aphrodisiac. It was definitely too naïve of him when he thought his young boyfriend would leave him alone right after their very heated lovemaking session in an equally, if not more heated steaming bathroom. The moment they found themselves nestled under the sheets, his words were snatched away by Noiz, once again, even before the “so how was the trip” could make their way out of his throat. He was desperate, he knew it himself; the boner he’d experienced when Noiz’s completely exposed body features glided into his line of sight had told him so. But his self-restraint was still strong, a huge contrast with Noiz who seemed to have abandoned every contemplation of enduring his need as he found his mouth savouring every part of Aoba’s skin, leaving marks after marks until Aoba was wholly lured into his seduction that he decided to take his flustered expression as a yes to yet another prolonged lovemaking session.

It was a hectic night; one of the busiest Aoba had faced during the seven days without Noiz. It astonished him how Noiz could still put forth such tremendous passion and energy despite being overloaded with responsibilities for the past week. But then again, he thought of the countless times they had mutually expressed the desperation to return to each other’s proximity and, suddenly, every ounce of this passion shouted of nothing but affection. And before he knew it, he had not only fell into the seduction trap Noiz had placed for him; but also seducing Noiz to fall into the trap _he_ set for him as well.

The next time he regained consciousness, his head pounded as he sat awake, eyes dazed and mind drowsy. He could’ve sank back to sleep if he hadn’t found Noiz grasping onto his torso while he slept, snoring silently by his side. Letting out a weak smile, Aoba laid back down, settling his head on Noiz’s arm and rolling to his side just to catch sight of his boyfriend’s stunning sleeping features. Despite the lethargy still strong in his head, he couldn’t help but beam upon seeing the view in front of him - Noiz looked completely relaxed, his relentless overweight mind at ease for once. He loved to pore over the way Noiz slept: young profile portraying a hidden sign of naivety, his face coarse against his skin, and when he let out quiet sounds like how he was doing now, all Aoba wanted to do was to pull him into his arms and cradle his head, unceasingly telling him - reassuring him - that no matter how far he was to wander away from him, Aoba would always be here waiting for him to come home.

Just as he was about to do just that, Noiz shifted a little, inching himself closer and Aoba had to cover his mouth to contain a yelp when he felt Noiz’s still-soft dick pressing against his thighs. Swallowing down his throat to resist the sudden spark of need coursing through his entire body, he closed his eyes, attempting to go back to sleep, trying to distract himself and feeling pathetic for being so effortlessly aroused. It worked; but it was short-lived. When Noiz moved again, the piercings on the tip of his head rubbed against Aoba’s thigh, sending his thoughts into rampant mode. Burying his head against the crook of Noiz’s neck to upkeep his composure, he tried to ignore the scorching impulse that was starting to build in his crotch. He only needed a few moments and he’d be able to calm down; but the moment he found Noiz closing in and nuzzling against his neck, he knew that whatever self-control he had left was meant to be disposed after all.

Noiz was clearly awake, not fully, perhaps on the same level of drowsiness as he was. But his body won’t lie, _their_ bodies won’t lie; and even though their subconscious weren’t in the perfectly wide-awake state, they were physically drawn towards each other like a different side of a magnet, as if the way they were _yearning_ for each other’s flesh was the most natural and most right thing to do at the moment.

It only took a kiss on his neck before Aoba found himself thrusting frivolously against Noiz’s hips, a loud enough signal for Noiz to suck a deeper mark on Aoba’s skin. It only took one hug, one mouth-to-mouth feverish kiss before they found their dicks pressing against each other, Noiz’s dick piercings sinking into Aoba’s sensitive skin and eliciting a quiet moan out of Aoba.

With his eyes shut tight, Aoba instinctively rubbed his dick against Noiz’s, attempting to feel as much stimulation as he could while Noiz traced a palm along Aoba’s spine, finding his way down south and towards Aoba’s ass as he gave the soft flesh a light squeeze. Aoba merely moaned out of reflex before he continued grinding against Noiz’s dick, the feeling of metal hitting his sensitive spots way too addictive for him to stop.

Taking that as an encouragement, Noiz then rocked against him, bringing about a louder moan out of Aoba when the tip of his erection accidentally hitting on Noiz’s navel piercing. Another groan, a few more thrusts later and Noiz heard his name fell from Aoba’s lips, urging him to slide his free hand in between their bodies and eventually gripped casually on both of the heads of their dicks, now slick with precum.

“N-Noiz…” Aoba breathed, finally opening his eyes to catch Noiz staring fervently at him, faint blush on his cheeks as he gave him a suggestive smirk.

“You’re awake,” Noiz’s husky voice echoed between pants, keeping his hand busy as he gripped both of their erections, rolled their heads together just to trigger more sensitive stimulation from the both of them before he started to rubbed both the half-hard dicks together.

“A-ah…” It wasn’t a question but a statement and Aoba couldn’t be bothered to answer him before he found his hands encircling around Noiz’s neck, practically burying his face into his boyfriend’s hair as he sobbed chokingly into it.

He heard a smirk, then a deep breath; and before he knew it, the grip on their erections had increased in both strength and motion, the pumping suddenly becoming way too overpowering for his barely conscious body and mind to contain.

While he struggle to catch his breath, Noiz leaned in, close enough to breathe in his scent, intimate enough to hover his lips against Aoba’s flushed red skin, the mere sight more than enough to send a rush of anticipation towards the direction of his dick. As soon as he captured a mouthful of Aoba’s skin into his mouth, he felt the other shiver in shock, felt his clutch on his head tighten, and felt the two dicks hardening in his hand. He wanted to do more, to arouse both him and Aoba more but it seemed like he himself was too crushed by his own need as well as he found his body moving on its own. Twitching his hips upwards, he joined both Aoba’s and his own hands motions, Aoba’s raucous moans sounding like angelic aphrodisiac by his ear.

It only took another few hard pumps when for Aoba to tremble violently in his arm, his nails clawing against Noiz’s back before he came, hard, spurting semen on both of their chests. Noiz came right after, over-stimulating Aoba while he chased his own orgasm, Aoba’s bite on his shoulder being the final trigger to his own climax.

While they waited for their breathing to calm down, Noiz took his hand off their dicks, smirking at the thick cum dripping off his hand before he leaned in to plant a soft kiss on Aoba’s cheek, a pang of warmth hitting directly into his chest when he noticed how Aoba was breathing open-mouthed, lips pouty and eyes moist. It almost took all of his willpower to stop himself before he could hover over Aoba again and lead them into a second round.

“M'nin…” Aoba mumbled, his voice still croaky from the early loud moans.

Noiz responded with a kiss on his forehead, noticing how Aoba was almost falling back to sleep. Sensing an impulsive urge, he cupped Aoba’s face, catching him in a feverish kiss before he felt Aoba sighing into his mouth, keenly letting Noiz devour him. Perhaps if he was to suggest a second round Aoba wouldn’t have minded after all. But their bodies suggested otherwise, they could feel the exhaustion in their bones; they’d been overtiring their bodies ever since yesterday night and causing Aoba to collapse under fatigue was the last thing Noiz ever needed.

So instead, he brought Aoba into his arms, swiping a few messy strands of hair off his forehead before he wiped himself clean with a few wet tissues he pulled from the bedside table. Then, propping himself up against the bed head, he fell silent, seemingly thinking of something.

“…Noiz?” Aoba called out, noticing the sudden shift of atmosphere. “What’s wrong?”

He was more awake now, his body finally returned to its initial state.

“Nothing,” Noiz responded simply before he sent a smile at Aoba’s direction. “Just thinking of what to make for breakfast.”

Giving out a broad grin, Aoba cuddled against Noiz’s body, nuzzling his cheek against his torso, a gesture that Noiz couldn’t decipher the meaning of.

“What?” he asked when Aoba looked up at him, just to flash him a suggestive smirk.

“Nothing,” Aoba replicated his word. “Just thinking about how nice it feels to wake up to you cooking breakfast for us once in a while. I missed this.”

Noiz knew what he meant. Separation had never been easy for them, especially when they were so used to each other’s affection that having one of them absent from their side was like having half of their soul lost. Releasing an instinctive chuckle, he hugged his boyfriend’s torso in his arms, indulging himself in his more-than-familiar warmth and feeling a different sense of warmth hitting deep within him at the same time.

He never thought he’d yearn to wake up with another person’s presence by his side; he thought he was used to solitude, that loneliness was meant to be part of his life. But now that Aoba had taught him how gratifying it’d feel to be able to open his eyes to the beauty of another presence, he never wanted to return to how it was again.

And he wanted to keep waking up to see Aoba by his side, to make him breakfast while they cuddled under the sheets just like this, preparing to welcome another day of optimistic sunlight and happiness.

 


	51. Winter Morning; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick NoiAo snuggly morning piece.

If there was one thing Aoba hadn’t gotten used to ever since he’d moved to Germany, it was definitely the weather. He’d read, heard, told that winter in Germany could be very cold; an extent he might not be anticipating. He thought he was ready for it, but as soon as the reality fell upon him, he instantly knew that he was lying to himself - he was not ready for it.

His first experience with this overly cold weather caught him off guard. Noiz had mindfully wore a few more layers of clothing for him before they went to bed on that night, even asking to sleep in his room for the day, urging Aoba to suspect if he had more than just an innocent intention to keep each other warm with such an upfront initiative. Well, Noiz being utterly straightforward wasn’t something he should be surprised at anyway. But he lifted his alertness nevertheless, cuddling under the sheets with his boyfriend and feeling the other wrapping him into his arms from his back, pressing his head against Aoba’s shoulder all at the same time. He held his breath, all prepared for whatever that was to come.

But what came right after was a soft snore beside his ear and it told him loud enough that this time, he had miscalculated Noiz - that the brat could really be insufferably innocent at times.

Falling asleep wasn’t too tough that night, even when all he felt was Noiz’s breath on his cold neck and a firm hug that had restrained all of his movements.

But what was tough was when he woke up the next morning, nose stinging, flu running, and with chills that was nonexistent the previous night creeping all over his body. It was a sign apparent enough to tell him that the first strike of winter had gotten to him and that if Noiz hadn’t prepped him up for this impact on the previous night, he’d most likely find himself already turning into a human ice cube by this time.

He tried to move, but Noiz was still hugging him, still sleeping and seemingly didn’t have the intention to wake any time soon.

“Noiz…” he whispered. He felt bad for having to wake him up but he was freezing and he wanted nothing but to soak himself in a tub of good warm water at this very moment. He tried to move, feeling guilty with every tiny motion he made but as soon as he turned his head ever so slightly just so he could catch a glimpse of his boyfriend, Noiz’s embrace weakened, giving him a chance to pull himself out of him.

He already missed Noiz’s warmth the moment he got out of his hug but obligations were ringing in his ears as he pushed one leg off the bed, trembling at the sudden hit of cold air against warm skin, and was about to sit up when he found a pair of arms wrapping around his torso again, pulling him back into bed.

“It’s too cold… Get back here…”

He didn’t know how long had Noiz been awake. Was he sleep-talking? Turning around to confirm his qualms, he saw Noiz lifting a pair of bleary eyes at him, a thin smile accompanying the clearly half-asleep look.

“Aren’t you cold?” he asked out of reflex, half of him being concerned, half of him being curious.

“I am,” Noiz said, snuggling up to Aoba and pressing both of their bodies close to each other. “Very.”

“Get up,” Aoba reprimanded. “I’ll make hot bath for you.”

“But I’ve got a better solution.”

Aoba didn’t even need to ask what his solution was. Without warning, he felt a tender kiss against his neck, followed by a hard suck that he knew would definitely create a mark.

“Seriously…” Letting out a bitter smile, he returned his boyfriend’s hug, encircling both of his arms around his body, a weak attempt to warm him up even just for just a tad. With a kiss on Noiz’s forehead, he was already feeling the other making his way from the side of his neck to his throat and ultimately looking up at him, an obvious plead glinting intensely in his eyes.

Perhaps this could work better, Aoba thought as he pulled Noiz closer by the neck, pressing their lips together into a feverish wet kiss.

And perhaps… Noiz’s intention to sleep together in the same room wasn’t as innocent as Aoba thought as well.

As expected.

 


	52. Allured; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drunken lovemaking prelude.

Company events weren’t something they were unfamiliar with. Ever since Aoba had started to help him out with his company affairs, he’d find himself looking up on ways to groom himself better, often unconsciously staring for a bit too long into the mirror until Noiz came over and flashed him a suggestive smirk from his back. It wasn’t like he was overly conscious over his own appearance but he thought if he was to accompany such a prominent person like Noiz to such a formal occasion, he should at least present himself the best he could so as to avoid embarrassing the other. 

Noiz didn’t seem like he minded, though. But Aoba had his own pride to uphold, and soon, he found himself being part of Aoba’s constant grooming ritual, to the extent that whenever he passed by a formal clothing boutique he’d reflexively scanned through the rows of well-presented suits, often having to swallow the urge down before he could end up earning another round of reprimands when Aoba found out how many shopping bags he’d brought home with him. 

Aoba wasn’t too surprised when he found himself having to attend yet another formal occasion the next day either. At first, he would stutter, telling Noiz that if he was really the right person to attend such a big occasion as Noiz’s partner; and Noiz would, again and again, told Aoba to rest assure and that nobody else but him was the best candidate he could ever bring for himself. 

Hence, when they were told that there was yet another formal dinner they needed to attend the next evening, Aoba immediately spent the previous night in the bathroom, taking up the space longer than he ever needed before Noiz came knocking on the door, a face of concern when he peeked through the door gap.

Aoba knew Noiz was being genuine with everything he’d told Aoba; and Aoba wanted to retain that confidence, perhaps even surpassing it.

“I’ve got this,” Aoba replied simply. Braids weren’t something he was used to either. It reminded him of a faraway memory when he had Koujaku braiding his hair once when they were small but he’d never attempted this when he was an adult now either. Noiz seemed to be particularly amused at the sight though. Taking leisure steps into the bathroom, he stood behind Aoba, took his hands off his half-braided hair, and leaned down, kissing Aoba’s undefensive nape out of the blue.

“You’re trying a different hairstyle,” he smirked the moment he saw Aoba attempting to pull his hair up into a ponytail and attempting to braid the ends all at the same time. “You seem like you need help.”

“Not really.” While the silence stretched after Noiz’s half-serious tone, he spoke again, this time sounding much more suggestive. “But maybe.”

“O-oi!” Aoba shrieked. This brat is getting too full of himself. And Aoba knew he only had himself to blame for exposing his weakness just like that.

“Can’t help it,” Noiz said casually, sounding as if whatever he had just done was the most natural thing to do. “Are you done here, by the way?”

“Huh? Do we have anything else planned after this?” Aoba asked, hands already resuming to try out the new hairstyle on his hair.

“Nothing fancy,” Noiz answered. “Just thought of training your alcohol tolerance up before we walk into the war zone tomorrow.”

“Make up your mind,” Aoba grumbled. Finally turning around to face his boyfriend, he wore a pout on his face, alongside a thin frown in between his eyebrows.

“I’ve prepared some wine for us tonight,” Noiz said with a grin, hands instinctively wrapping the whole of Aoba’s waist, drawing him closer and feeling the tips of their noses touching.

“What’s the occasion?” Aoba was surprised with both the sudden initiative and the sudden intimacy, but not enough to make him push Noiz away.

“Aren’t we drinking tonight?”

This brat was obviously underestimating him. But rejecting him now only meant an early defeat so, letting out a loud sigh, Aoba pushed him away, walked towards the door, and only turning around to look at him when he already had one hand on the doorknob.

Or so Aoba thought.

He thought he could handle it. Company events weren’t something unfamiliar to him; same goes to alcohol intake. It was all part of the formal occasion and he knew that he’d have to face it sooner or later. Noiz was well aware of how low his alcohol tolerance was - the first time he’d encountered the situation had him smiling in awe, amused at how absurd Aoba could look like at that very moment - but it did nothing but further intensifying the need to protect from within him as he started fixing an intense pair of eyes on his boyfriend every time he was to consume a drink. Now that they were in the comfort of their own home, there was nothing that they needed to be wary of. They had each other, and each other was their best support.

“I thought you’d become better once you get used to drinking,” Noiz grinned. Sitting opposite Aoba with his arms crossed and his own wine glass abandoned on the side, his face only portrayed nothing but fascination as he watched Aoba let out a quiet hiccup, face flustered red and eyes dazed with arousal. 

“I… can..!” His voice wasn’t even convincing at all. But it was a sound Noiz had never gotten to hear a lot of times: husky, hoarse, and definitely arousing. It did things to him. Taking the way Aoba had just slumped himself on the table as a loud signal, he moved out of his seat, strolled towards his boyfriend, and lifted him up with one hand, slinging one of Aoba’s arms over his own shoulder before he escorted him back into his bedroom. 

Aoba must have passed out, or he must have agreed to Noiz; because the silence after that was nothing Noiz had expected. He fell onto his bed on his own will the moment the comfort material came into sight, soft snores escaped his lips as he struggled with his own shirt, as if attempting to take it off.

“I… can….”

“Shh,” he hushed. “You can’t even stand.”

“I really need to keep a better eye on you,” Noiz whispered, every one of his words vibrated loudly in Aoba’s ears, the heat on his face alongside the loud heartbeats in his ears did nothing but pumping furious blood throughout his veins.

Letting out a low whistle, Noiz unbuttoned his shirt as well before he hovered over his drunk boyfriend, picking his hand up just in time to see Aoba giving him a hazed look.

“Noiz…” he called out. His conscious was fading out, but his body was honest. Noiz must have seen through it as well, because then, his kiss wouldn’t feel so hungry when he finally leaned down and took the whole of Aoba’s mouth into his own. Their tongues tangled, their hands on each other, and all Aoba could feel was how hot both his mind and his body was, as if he was fed with not wine but aphrodisiac over the dining table. 

“Kiss me,” he said, misty eyes fixed on his boyfriend’s intense lime-green ones. Noiz obeyed without hesitation.

“Noiz…” he called out again as soon as he caught air. Noiz was waiting; Aoba knew he was. He didn’t need to ask him what exactly he was waiting.

Was it alcohol, Aoba thought? Lovemaking with Noiz had always been wonderful, but tonight, he felt as if he was melting in Noiz’s arms, as if he was becoming one with Noiz and that thought enticed him to no end. What else could he do so that he could combine with Noiz? What else could he do for Noiz so that he could translate this heavy bundle of emotions on his chest concisely and coherently to him? 

He didn’t have the answer. Maybe Noiz was drunk as well, he thought when Noiz spread his legs, licking his thighs and leaving marks all over as if he was savoring a delicious meal. Maybe Noiz wanted to be one with him as well. 

And maybe, Noiz had seen through him all this while - the whole intention of feeding him with alcohol with the intention to “train”; the whole intention of bringing him into his room and making love to him while they were both in a heated state. 

Perhaps this was Noiz’s intention all along. 

“Brat,” he chuckled, immediately urging Noiz to look up at him. As their eyes fixed on each other, he let out a smile, sitting up then hugging Noiz on the head. “I’ll let you eat me anytime, you know?” 

His words may sound weird, awkward; but he knew Noiz would get it. And soon enough, Noiz had buried his head in his shoulder, licking teasingly on his shoulder blade before he gave his flustered skin a hard suck. 

Noiz was wrong. It didn’t make Aoba looked tastier; but it did arouse Noiz a whole lot - perhaps to a level where they weren’t be able to attain when they were both way too conscious of their own rationality.

“But you look tastier being all aroused like that,” Noiz mumbled against his skin, sending a wave of heated want all over him.

Noiz was an insatiable, hungry wolf. It wasn’t the first time this very impression had crossed Aoba’s mind. Because whenever Noiz devoured him, all he could feel was the intense burst of emotions within him, and all that was in his mind was Noiz’s feverish yet desperate want, that he was mercilessly crushing on Aoba whenever he let out all of his lust.

 


	53. Tiny Thoughts; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do you think about children?”
> 
> Being concerned about Aoba’s thoughts about moving here to stay with him in Germany wasn’t the biggest qualms he had - but how to overcome it.

Heading here wasn’t his first intention, but it wasn’t like he minded the natural turn of course anyway. Aoba had sent him a text messages halfway through a redundant meeting telling him that he’d meet him after work. Sometimes, Noiz couldn’t help but wonder if Aoba really could read his minds or if he was simply too good with coincidences. Probably Aoba was really observant, or probably Aoba knew him a lot more than he knew Aoba that had him conducting the perfect action on the perfect occasion at all times. But happiness had its own curse; while Noiz was silently anticipating the end of this meeting, he couldn’t help but find himself shifting off from his priorities, only coming back to himself when Theo tapped him on the shoulder, informing him that the meeting was done for the day.

“Was it Aoba-san?”

Noiz only quirked a seemingly dissatisfied upward gaze at Theo, who was smiling gleefully at him. But his contradiction between being amazed and being frustrated was way too pronounced for Theo to miss before he straightened himself up, gave his brother a pat on the shoulder and headed towards the door.

“Ah, Aoba-san said he’ll be outside in about…” he stopped at the door, checking his Coil before he smiled again. “Now.”

The reaction he’d seen on Noiz’s face was one that he swore he would never get to see if Aoba wasn’t around.

And without a word, Noiz strolled out of the meeting room, having no intention to return to his own office as he ran directly towards the main lobby area, where Aoba was waiting.

“Sorry, did you wait for long?”

“Huh?” Aoba turned around, seemingly surprised by the sudden voice before he broke into a huge grin. “Not at all! Haha, look at you, did you seriously just run your way here? It’s not even time to leave yet!”

“Theo said…”

Aoba frowned. “Well, I told him not to tell you… Anyway, let’s go!”

Instinctively, Noiz picked Aoba’s hand into his, intertwining their fingers together while Aoba gave him a stern pout.

“O-oi…”

“What?”

Noiz knew _exactly_ what, but it didn’t seem like he minded it either. Doing nothing but further grasping Aoba’s hand, he walked, without a single look back at Aoba, before he heard a sigh from behind him.

“…Nothing.” The next time he looked Aoba in the face, Aoba was giving him a gentle smile that spelled strongly of affection. He sometimes wondered if he’d cause Aoba any discomfort with these abrupt actions he used to conduct but as Aoba had mindfully confessed one night when he was sulking out of reflex, it didn’t seem like Aoba minded the discomfort; or rather, he never knew how to react to situations like these that had pushed him into a whirlpool of embarrassment.

Noiz thought that he’d get used to this over time, but it seemed that it’d become a unique trait of Aoba and even when he did feel bad at times, he couldn’t help but chuckle at the endearing reaction where a thin layer of flush would appear on Aoba’s face whenever he portrayed outright public display of affection.

“Where are we going?” Noiz asked, noticing that Aoba had been quiet and had been looking at everywhere else but him for a while now.

“Hmm, I’m missing a few ingredients for dinner tonight… oh, can we stop by here?”

It was a playground. Without knowing what might have triggered this sudden intention, Noiz could only follow as Aoba dragged him into the place, where two children - a boy and a girl - were playing in the sandpit. Smiling brightly upon noticing that the swings were vacant, Aoba strode right towards them, then sat on one of them while he shook the handle of the other to urge Noiz to join him.

“Have you been here before?” Aoba asked as soon as Noiz sat beside him, gradually pushing the swing so that it moved just enough for him to feel the motion.

“Maybe, can’t remember.”

“You know, when I was young, I used to spend a lot of time in the playground,” Aoba started, as if he’d noticed the contradictions on Noiz’s face whenever his childhood was mentioned. “But no one wanted to play with me though.”  
He heard a quiet hitch of breath by his side before he turned around, just in time to see Noiz shifting his gaze towards the pair of children, who were sitting in the sandpit and building what looked like a sand castle.

Were they siblings? Noiz wondered. But his thoughts were soon interrupted when Aoba’s swing suddenly gained motion.

“I thought I was weird, but probably I was just not strong enough to make friends then.” He could vaguely hear Aoba from the sound of his swings. “You were the same, right?”

He didn’t expect the question. Letting out a quiet sigh, he lifted his head, looking right at Aoba before a smirk was added onto his features.

“What’s with this sudden reminiscing? Missed playing in a playground?”

“W-well…” Aoba pouted with a frown, slowing down his swing motion before he replied. “I… kind of… found…”

He left his words hanging, also left Noiz staring in mild curiosity.

“… your pictures when you were… sma–”

Noiz didn’t hear the rest of the sentence before he quickly turned away, the loud thumping in his heart distracting his rational thoughts. _It must be Theo_.

“W-Well, the past is the past! We can’t do anything to change it. I just thought how similar both of us could be. I used to be alone myself, so I can understand. And…” he paused again. Standing up from his seat, he walked to squat in front of Noiz, then cupping his face so that Noiz was looking directly into his eyes. “… I thought we can do this together now if we have the time.”

But they didn’t have the time. Today was one of the rare occasions where Noiz managed to slip himself off work just so he could spend more time with Aoba. Juggling between real life obligations and spending time with Aoba had been a real challenge to him. Aoba had told him to focus on his priorities but it wasn’t helping either because Aoba didn’t realize that his topmost priority was _Aoba_ himself. It was a real struggle ever since he’d made this decisive step and above all, he wanted so very much to spend more time with Aoba, feeling the stab in his chest whenever he realized how Aoba had been spending most of his time being alone now that his work had picked up speed. He’d tried his best to talk to Aoba as much as he could but he also knew that Aoba didn’t mind it at all, let alone complaining about how Noiz hadn’t been spending enough time with him.

It was Noiz’s own internal struggle that he had to overcome; that he had yet to figure out a solution for.

Unconsciously, he shifted his eyes back at the pair of children, without knowing what else he could say. Then…

“What do you think about children?”

“Huh?” His question definitely caught Aoba off guard. “Wh-what? Children?”

Perhaps _they_  can keep him company.

“Yeah, what do you think about them?”

Aoba probably didn’t have the best experiences with children, judging on how he used to see him complaining about the three brats who once intruded his store privacy back in Midorijima. But he had never asked him in an upfront way before either - of how _exactly_ did he think about them.

“I… guess they’re fine? I’m not sure, to be honest,” Aoba said, supporting his elbows on his knees now as he considered. “I think they’re pretty cute.”

Now both of them were looking at the same thing.

“Why do you asked, by the way?”

With another two more seconds of stretched staring, Noiz lifted a smile again, his tone filled with thick suggestiveness when he spoke,

“Do you want children for ourselves?”

“Wh-” Aoba gaped. “What?! No, no, no, I can’t!”

“Adoption, maybe?”

“Noiz!”

Noiz seemed to have gone way too far into his own thoughts, perhaps even already planning how they could achieve it.

“Now stop right there, you!” Aoba’s frown deepened. Standing up, he looked down at Noiz, then flicking a finger against his forehead. “I don’t know what you’ve been thinking but if I need to say this again, I will. I’m perfectly okay with my life here now and don’t you ever think that bringing me here is a mistake. I’ll say it again and again, no matter how many times I need to repeat this. You go and do what you need to do, tell me if you need my help. And,” he stopped with a smile, then hugging Noiz’s head and patting the back of it all at the same time. “Seeing you doing what you want to do is more than enough for me, really. Okay?”

He wasn’t expecting Aoba to react in such way. Smirking against his tummy, he planted a kiss on it, feeling a small tremble from the other before he wrapped his arms around the whole of Aoba’s waist, literally pressing his face against Aoba’s soft abdomen.

“… ah, but… “ Aoba’s hesitation made him raise his head, just to see Aoba averting his eyes, thick blush forming on his cheeks. “… children are really… nice, I suppose.”

He couldn’t figure out what that statement implied. But for all he knew, Aoba was happy right now. And if he ever needed to do anything _more_ for him to be happier, he would do it. For Aoba.

 


	54. Man From The Moon; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He heard of the man from the moon, but this is the first time he heard of a bunny from the moon.

One of the rare things he could remember when he was young and restrained in the room was the dim surrounding lit up by nothing but the moonlight pouring him from the outside of his room window. It felt like the only comfort he had at that time and before he knew it, he found himself inching closer towards the window, ultimately resting his hands on the window sill as he gazed quietly up at the sky. This was a specific occurrence where he remembered catching sight of an amazingly beautiful full moon in the sky, one that he hadn’t gotten a lot of chance to see. Throughout the years he was locked up in the room, his only companion had been his bunny plush; the only conversation he had was between him and the maid who often came to give him food, and intermittently, his brother, Theo, who would sneak to his room when everyone was deep asleep just so he could have a few quick silent conversations with him.

Apart from that, his world was dark and lonely, his lack of ability to feel emotions not helping the slightest to lift the mood up from within him. He’d never understood how it felt to be surrounded by noise and warmth and laughter, let alone knowing how it’d feel to be concerned at, to be comforted and to be loved.

There were times when he’d gaze out of the window, staring at nothing as he considered if he would be able to feel _anything_ at all if he tried hard enough. But there wasn’t any hint. And it was when he saw the bright moonlight invading his room that he had, for the first time in his life, thought that this might be close to how warmth felt like.

The moonlight brightened his room, not too much, but just enough for Noiz to squint his eyes at the contrasting atmosphere. It felt like a ray of hope, penetrating through the mist of darkness he was secluded in and attempting to save him out of this black hole. Instinctively, he pressed his small palm against the window, as if trying to catch hold of the ray of light. He didn’t know what he should do with this. He’d read about moons and he knew this must be one of the days when the moon grew full and shone brighter than usual. But did that mean anything?

He didn’t know the answer. Perhaps there was no answer after all. Perhaps this wasn’t even a question in the first place.

He’d heard about the story of a Man on the Moon. As he repeated the fairy tale in his head, he laughed at how ridiculous his own thoughts were; how it sounded stupid even in his head when he thought that a Man would really descend from the moon and save him out of his misery.

He closed his eyes, leaned his back against the wall, and hugged his bunny plush tighter.

There was no man; the only man he had was himself.

* * *

When Noiz and Aoba returned to Midorijima for their usual visit, the town was buzzing in a mild sense of excitement that caught Noiz in surprise. It was when Aoba explained that everyone was preparing for a festival to celebrate the middle of autumn and the moon that Noiz found his memory bank rolling. He remembered reading about it, but he never thought that he would be part of it.

On that very night, they returned to the apartment where Noiz had rented for themselves to stay whenever they return for the visit. While he waited for Aoba to come out of the shower, he sat alone in the room, lights dimmed and staring at nothing but the blank wall ahead of him. The curtains were closed and the windows were slightly agape, the moonlight pouring feebly yet steadily into the room. Standing up, he pulled the curtains open, his eyes widening the moment the bright moonlight invaded the once dark atmosphere.

“Is this your first time seeing a moon as bright as this?” Aoba’s voice almost made him jump but he maintained his composure, turning around to meet his boyfriend, who had a towel hanging over his neck and what seemed like a box and a sake bottle in his hands.

Noiz let out a small smile. Shaking his head, he returned his gaze to the moon, searching for the piece of memory he had once buried and long forgotten.

“I’ve seen this once when I was small.”

He couldn’t quite remember exactly what kind of feelings he held then. But he remembered the grief and the desperate need to break through the four walls that had ultimately brought him here, to Midorijima.

“Come here.”

It was only when Aoba called out to him that he shifted his attention away again, just to see Aoba dragging a short table along with two cushions and positioned them in the center of the room, where he placed the box and the sake on the table. When Noiz joined him, Aoba gave him a playful smirk, then opening the box to reveal three what seemed like [rabbit-shaped gnocchi](http://www.alljapantours.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/e38186e38195e3818de38299e4b88ae794a8-02-480x360.jpg).

“It’s Mid-Autumn today,” he started explaining as he poured their cups full with sake. “Here, we spend time drinking and eating and moon-gazing all at once.”

Noiz had heard of this kind of festival before. But as with his first impression, he never thought he’d be part of it.

“I’m not sure if you believe in this kind of thing, but I wish it brings us good luck in the future.”

He looked up. Aoba still had his playful smile on his face as he pointed at the gnocchi.

“Did you make this?”

“Y-yeah,” Aoba replied, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “I looked up some recipe and since you _adore_ rabbit.” That one-word emphasis was totally unnecessary but Noiz knew Aoba too well to know that he was simply reaffirming his dominance in this conversation.

“Cute,” Noiz commented simply. Aoba probably worked this out when they were still over in Germany. How he managed to preserve them remained a mystery, though.

“So there won’t be any man descending from the moon?” Noiz asked, speaking his thoughts out loud before he could stop it. It was a decade-delayed question; something that he hadn’t been able to answer himself.

“Huh? Man?” Aoba stared at him, perplexed, before he let out a laugh. “So that’s what you believe in over there? We have no man here.” Leaning over to ruffle Noiz in the hair, Aoba picked up one of the gnocchis, then putting it in Noiz’s hand. “We have rabbit instead. Maybe it will descend if you call for it.”

Aoba was totally joking. Joining his smile, Noiz took a bite of the food, the mild taste spread in his mouth before he found a cup pushed into his direction.

“But a man would be nice, huh?”

He wasn’t sure if Aoba was talking to him or if he was talking to himself; the next time he looked at him, he was already looking out of the window.

“He’s already here,” he muttered, again, out of his own conscious. When Aoba looked at him, he pulled himself forward, then pressing his lips softly against Aoba’s before he mumbled against his mouth. “You. You’re the man who had descended from the moon.”

And he meant it; because Aoba was the man who had pulled him out of his pit of hopelessness anyway. Rabbit or man, all he ever needed was Aoba. Because Aoba was the moonlight of hope he’d witnessed when he was stuck in eternal darkness after all.

 


	55. Dissonance; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Aoba first told him that what he held towards Theo was something called jealousy, he wasn’t quite sure how to define it. It was a foreign feeling to him but when he experienced it again, this time, he was pretty sure that it wasn’t something he could dismiss just so easily.

Having Wilhelm in their life was a guilty delight of its own. Never in his life would Noiz expect himself to be encased in such warmth, such contentment, and in such a comfortable life that words like “monster”, “useless” or “unneeded” no longer rang by his ears at any time possible. It was a life he had secretly yearned for; but it was also a life he had never brought himself to vigorously seek for it.

He once thought that it’d be more than enough for him to be able to survive by himself. He needed no one, and he didn’t think that anyone needed him as well.

But Aoba told him otherwise. Forcing his way into Noiz’s life in such an abrupt way no one ever did, _Aoba_ told him that _he_ was not a monster, not useless and that _he_ needed him.

It was a guilty bliss of its own – one Noiz thought would never have happened to him – and even more so when Noiz ultimately brought Aoba with him to Germany, starting a new life here, in his hometown, with Aoba, who resonated of nothing but home.

When Wilhem made his way into their life, Noiz found himself staring gormlessly once in a while; sometimes at the ceiling, sometimes out of the window. Wilhelm’s existence had painted thick layers of colours into his life, above the ones that Aoba already permanently marked on. He never knew how to deal with a child in the first place, his own childhood reference one of the worst he could use. But he knew how he _should not_ treat a child. The way he handled Wilhelm often conjured teases from Aoba, who would always tell him that their child wasn’t made of glass and too much spoiling would lead to a less well growth in the long run.

Noiz tried taking Aoba’s advice. He really did. But there was just something… not quite right with the way he handled his child and ultimately, the priority staff was handed back to Aoba, who merely gave him a bitter smile and shook his head, telling him that he could probably take time to observe how he did it instead before he reclaimed his babysitting rights.

* * *

“Aoba?” Noiz stepped into the house one late night after he was done with his mountain of workload, just to find the house cloaked in deep darkness. The lights were off, there were no signs of movement around the space. Placing his briefcase on the couch, he pulled his tie loose, taking leisure steps towards the bedroom and, the moment he opened the door, he was right – Aoba was there, cuddling with a sleeping child in his arms as he turned around to face Noiz when he heard the sound of door opening.

“Shh,” he immediately whispered. Noiz stood at the doorway, waiting for Aoba. As soon as Aoba was done wrapping their son in the firm warmth of the blanket, he unhurriedly yet soundlessly moved out of the bed, towards Noiz.

“Coming to bed?” Noiz asked in a small voice, which was responded by a shake of head from Aoba.

“Not tonight. He just had a nightmare. I want to make sure that he sleeps well until the morning.”

Noiz could physically feel his heart sink. It couldn’t be helped then. Aoba was clearly passionate when it came to taking care of their son and Noiz couldn’t be more grateful to have him as a support for this growing family. Nodding, he leaned towards Aoba, pecking him tenderly on the lips before Aoba closed the door in his face.

He shouldn’t be feeling this way, he told himself. But there was no way he could ignore that loneliness he felt within him as he stared at the door, unsure of how to soothe the heavy weight beneath his chest now.

Work had been cruel to him as well. Not only that he had been coming back later than usual nowadays, he also found himself lacking the time to catch a phone call with Aoba over work, or even to type a message to Aoba just to check if everything was fine. Aoba told him not to worry about house matters, that he had everything under control, and Noiz trusted him, of course. But that wasn’t exactly _what_ that had been distressing him. Every night when he returned home, Aoba would either be already asleep or he would find him in their son’s room, cradling their son in his arms as he hushed Noiz out of the room when their son was already asleep.

It had been weeks since they could catch up for a proper cuddle; the insatiable urge within Noiz became intense with every passing day.

And finally, it was one good night when he managed to return home on his usual time that he found Aoba in the kitchen, alone, without their son.

“Where’s Wilhelm?” he asked.

“Oh, you’re back!” Aoba smiled brightly the moment he saw his husband walking through the door. “Hold on a minute, just need to get these dishes done.”

“Do you need help?” Noiz offered, which was responded by Aoba’s shake of head.

“It’s fine. You had a long day. Go out and take a rest first.”

But Noiz remained standing in the kitchen, scrutinizing every action of Aoba and merely smirked when Aoba turned around again to pout at him.

“Yes?” he asked with a frown on his face.

“Waiting for you,” Noiz responded, his voice sounded of nothing but tease.

“You… can wait outside, you know…” Aoba mumbled.

“It’s fine. I like to see you work.”

“Seriously, brat…”

Despite portraying strong disagreements towards what Noiz was doing, Aoba attempted, as hard as he could, to ignore Noiz’s existence in his space. Once he was done with the kitchen matters, he took his apron off, and was about to pull his high ponytail loose before Noiz took quick steps towards him, grasping his wrist and stopping him from doing so.

“Wh-what?”

“Nothing.”

It _wasn’t_ nothing. Aoba knew Noiz well enough to know that _something_ must have triggered his husband’s fervour. Especially when Noiz left his words hanging and started replying Aoba with one-word answers like that, he was _sure_ that his mind was filled with thoughts that might potentially be something too devastating for him to spell it out aloud _or_ something that he couldn’t find the right words to describe.

“What’s wrong?” Aoba asked. Taking his hand off his head, he grasped Noiz’s hand with both of his hands, grinning cheekily at him before he raised a hand and ruffled Noiz on the hair. “Tough time at work?”

“Not really,” Noiz muttered, eyes fixed penetratingly at the pair of light brown orbs in front of him.

“Really?” Aoba teased. “You’ve done a good job.” He patted Noiz on the head, still with the frisky smirk on his face before Noiz let out a small frown, accompanied by a small pout that Aoba was sure to miss if he hadn’t caught Noiz’s expression before he turned away.

“Wilhelm?” Noiz asked again, reminding Aoba that he’d forgotten to answer his question earlier.

“He turned in early today,” he said.

“Does that mean that you’re mine for the rest of the night?”

“Huh? W-well, technically, yeah, I guess…” Aoba eyed Noiz deviously. As Noiz’s eyes lifted with a glint of eagerness, he let out a chuckle. “Wait a minute.” Lifting his head enough to come to an equal eye level with Noiz, he curved the corners of his lips higher, impishly giving Noiz a tongue-in-cheek stare before he started again, “Don’t tell me… you’re _jealous_ of your own kid?”

Noiz’s eyes brightened. He’d never thought about that before. Jealousy, it was an emotion so very far-off to him. He could hardly define when or how jealousy would feel like.

“Don’t try to defend yourself,” Aoba quickly pressed a finger against his lips. “I’ve noticed this thing about you, you brat.”

Aoba’s smile only widened with every word he said. Now ruffling Noiz’s hair with both of his hands, he laughed, only making Noiz feel extremely awkward before he pulled Aoba’s hands off his head, frowning profoundly at him.

“So?” Aoba pestered. “Is it jealousy?”

Noiz scowled. Then, with a small sigh, he said, “I don’t know. All I know is I missed you and I want to spend time with you.”

Noiz’s words did things to him. He knew Noiz was upfront in his own genuine way but no matter how many times he was to hear such guileless words from his husband, it never failed to make his heart skip a beat.

“Brat…” He let out a bitter smile. “No matter who is to come into my life, you’ll always be my priority. I… will always love you. That will not change. Remember that, okay?”

A firm hug from Noiz told him that his message had reached Noiz loud and clear.

And that he would’ve been lucky if he could still bring himself off the bed the next morning, especially when he’d sensed that very dangerous yet extremely alluring spark of light in his husband’s eyes before he was being carried out of the kitchen.

 


	56. Sweet Ecstasy; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Aoba came up with this matching costume idea, he never thought that he would land himself in a mirrored position - matching costume, matching identity: that was what he saw in the man before him that was Noiz.

“Halloween?”

Noiz looked at Aoba in disbelief, his coffee cup stopped halfway from his lips.

“I’ve heard from our neighbour. It’s something like a festival you celebrate over here? We don’t have it in Midorijima, so it’s something completely new for me,” Aoba explained enthusiastically, both his elbows on the dining table, supporting his head with a defiant smile on his face.

“It’s new to me too,” Noiz responded after a brief sip on his coffee. “I’ve seen people celebrating it, but I’ve never been part of one before.”

“Hmmm…” Aoba hummed, a thin frown drawing a line in between his eyebrows. “So it’s new for the both of us… Doesn’t that makes it more interesting?”

Noiz lifted an amused eyebrow at Aoba. What was so fascinating about taking part in something that they had absolutely no idea of, anyway? In any case, it’d be a risky step by itself – they wouldn’t know what to do at first, in the process, at the end of it; even if something was to happen, they wouldn’t have foreseen it, let alone taking precaution. It was definitely something Noiz would never want to venture into.

But Aoba’s enthusiasm told him otherwise.

“Hey, let’s celebrate Halloween, shall we?” Aoba grinned, pulling his face closer to Noiz so that he was staring at him from the bottom-up.

“Do you even know what Halloween is?” Noiz returned a playful smirk. Putting his cup of coffee back onto the table, he crossed his arms, leaning forward so that their faces were merely inches apart.

“I can look it up, but as far as I know, there would be candies, costumes…”

“Well, let me know when you find out what exactly we should do,” Noiz sneered. After a quick peck on Aoba’s lips, he pulled himself apart, straightening his tie and standing up from the chair. “I’m running late, there’s an important meeting in the morning today.”

“Oh, you should’ve said that earlier,” Aoba raised from his seat frantically. Lifting Noiz’s suit from the chair, he helped his boyfriend into it, then tiptoed, just a bit, to kiss Noiz on the lips. “Have a good day at work. I’ll see what I can come out with.”

Noiz merely returned his passion with a thin smile. With a pat on his shoulder, he walked out of the house, leaving Aoba alone in the space to figure out his next action plan.

* * *

“Hmm… seems like some spooky celebration or something…” Aoba muttered as he scrolled through his hologram screen, sitting on the bed and leaning his back against the bedhead with Ren cuddling restfully by his side.

“Aoba, do you need help with information gathering?” Ren asked concernedly.

“I’m good. It’s not too hard to understand. _What’s_ hard, though,” he paused, dismissing all the hologram screens before he seized a nearby pillow and buried his face into it. “…is _where_ should I get all those crazy costumes?”

“What costumes are you looking for, Aoba?” Ren, as usual, was quick to the rescue. A short silence later, Aoba looked up, casting a cautious gaze at Ren’s direction.

“… There are some that I’ve seen which are really way too ludicrous for me, they’re like costume play, you know? Police wear… clown wear… bunny wear…”

“Wasn’t Noiz interested with bunny wear?” Ren supported, digging the long buried memory out of Aoba’s mind palace.

“ _No_ ,” Aoba’s response was strict and firm. “I don’t want the brat get everything he wants all the time, just like that. _Bunny wear_ , Ren. How does someone even come out with an idea _like that_? I can buy him a house of bunny if he wants but _me_ , being _one_? No way!”

“But Noiz would be delighted.”

“Don’t give him that idea,” Aoba pouted. There was _no way_ he could do it. He regretted not giving Noiz a good smack on his head when he suggested it months back. Noiz was probably teasing Aoba just to see his reaction, but Aoba knew that if he was to _really_ take an idea seriously, _nothing_ would stop him anyhow. It made him feel bad especially when it reminded him of Noiz’s unintentional hint of disappointment on his face that he may not even know had surfaced. After a short contemplation, he felt the tension within him plummeted as he mumbled. “…maybe next time. I’m certainly not prepared for it now.”

“Aoba mentioned costume play – how about the one that Noiz wore in Rhyme?”

“Huh?” His thoughts picked up pace, his gaze meandered to the closet. “The one Noiz wore in… Rhyme?” _Oh_.

Feeling his heart skip a beat, he rustled out of the bed, throttling right up to the closet and pulled it open.

“I’m not sure if he still keeps it, though,” he spoke as he rummaged through the drawers, then the boxes secluded deep in a corner of the closet. “Ah, found it!”

With an excited grin, he pulled the costume out – this sure brought back memories: when he first met Noiz, Noiz was in this lab coat with a huge rabbit head hiding his features. At first, Aoba thought that it was a huge joke, that there was no way someone would find a way to be to meticulously ridiculous at him. But now that he finally gotten his hands to check on this piece of costume properly, he realized that this attire was indeed, a piece of well-made costume. Not only that it looked seamlessly fitting on Noiz, but the accessories – the stethoscope, the bandages – were all _real items_ that weren’t props at all. Then, as he turned his attention to the rabbit head itself, he heaved the material up, squeezing and altering on the foam material for it to take its form. It was, as expected, really well-made as well. And it made him wonder if Noiz had all of these tailored made for him or if he’d actually made them himself.

“Such a big kid,” he chuckled. It was agonizing when he first met Noiz in this piece of costume; definitely a painful experience he’d never want to revisit. But now that he thought back about it, it dawned about him that Noiz was, after all, a kid in an adult body. For him to choose such a daunting yet adorable costume was a good proof of it.

“Thank you, Ren. I guess this would do,” Aoba grinned at Ren, ruffling his fur at the same time to express his gratitude.

“Aoba, what are you planning to do?”

“Hmm, Noiz got his costume ready.” He looked at the rabbit head in his hands. “I should think of a way to make mine too.”

But at least he wasn’t completely clueless now. He had good materials in hands. The only thing he needed now – was time.

* * *

Three days before Halloween, Aoba found himself staying up late, an equal comparison to Noiz’s daily routine. Noiz was curious with this sudden change of behaviour, but Aoba rushed him out of his room before Noiz could even peek into it. Deciding to _make_ his own costume would probably be the worst decision he’d ever made in his life. He’d called Tae for instructions, but when he actually came down to it, it was still tough, and it was a huge challenge by itself trying to keep his bandaged fingers out of Noiz’s view.

One day before Halloween, he let out a relieved sigh as he stared happily at the piece of lab coat he’d made for himself. He was proud, that was certain. And this could probably be the first ever piece of garment he’d sewn with his very own hands. Now that that was done, he shifted his attention to the rabbit head instead – _another_ hurdle he needed to overcome. There were a few ideas swimming around his head when he first saw the prop but after a constricted struggle, he decided that perhaps it was best to make a matching one with Noiz’s.

And that was how he’d made up the decision to produce a similar rabbit head, one that was blue instead of green.

“Well, he _did_ say he wants to see me in rabbit wear, right?” Aoba said as he pulled the toolbox towards him, rolling his sleeves and all ready to get into work. He knew he was contradicting himself, but the thought of showing Noiz a “rabbit self” of himself elevated his mood. This might not be what Noiz was expecting, but it was still something similar anyway.

“Pretty sure that wasn’t what Noiz meant…” Ren said, but he was immediately hushed by a stern sideway glare from Aoba.

“Brat should be appreciative for whatever he can get!” Aoba proclaimed loudly, as if he wanted the man next door to hear him.

“Aoba, do you think you can make it on time?” Ren asked instead, attempting to draw them out of the rigid atmosphere.

Aoba looked at the time on his Coil. It’s past 22:00 now. He had about one day to make this work.

“I’ll try. But,” he frowned, laying the template on the floor. “No, I’ll make it.”

* * *

Breakfast over the table the next morning was horrendous. He’d stayed up for the entire night to build the structure of the costume. It wasn’t an easy job and across the entire time he was working on it, he couldn’t help but wonder how Noiz did it in the first place. Noiz having remarkable skills with his fingers was something he’d come to know since a long time ago; but this was undoubtedly a whole different level that required professional skills.

Noiz was amazing, he concluded at the end of his framing work. Staring at the bruises all over his hands, he let out a small sigh. He’d never thought he would ever go over the length for someone in his entire life that wasn’t his family, yet. And he’d never expected himself to be so fired up for a nineteen-year-old brat, either.

“You look tired,” Noiz remarked. Hand still on his coffee cup, he gave Aoba a tender smile. As Aoba lifted his head from the table to catch a good glimpse of his boyfriend, a small smile naturally curved on the end of his lips. He felt like he hadn’t been seeing his boyfriend for a very long time – that overly striking blond hair, the intensity in his pair of lime-green eyes, and every one of Noiz’s features made his heart ran in an ardent pace. Averting his gaze, he looked away, feeling that one second too long into Noiz’s penetrating gaze would sweep him into a whole different phase which he had come to know very well.

“So what’s the plan for today?” Noiz asked, pretending as if he hadn’t noticed Aoba’s intentional divert of attention.

“What time are you coming home today?” Aoba asked instead, voice groggy and head in the mist.

“Early.”

“How early is ‘early’?”

“Hmm,” Noiz considered. “Before dinner, if everything goes well.”

“Ah, that’s great then,” Aoba beamed. “You’ll see when you’re back.”

“Heh.” With a smirk, Noiz stood up, bending over the table to kiss Aoba on the forehead before he slung his suit over his shoulder, preparing to take his leave. “I’ll get going then.”

“Have a good day at work,” Aoba said. And before he could stand up to properly send his boyfriend out of the house, Noiz had closed the door, leaving the solitude back to Aoba once again.

“Okay, c’mon, I can do this!” Slapping his hands on both of his face, Aoba strode back into his room, his heart sank when he caught sight of the mess he’d left behind when he’d accidentally fell asleep halfway through work in the previous night.

“Aoba, you can do it,” Ren supported, visibly noticing Aoba’s frustration.

“Yes, you’re right!” Aoba heightened his voice. “I’m not going to give up now that I’ve come so far!”

And just like that, he dove back to work, feeling the enthusiasm within him boosted with every passing second as he worked through the final touch-up of his Halloween costume.

* * *

It was half past seven when he slumped on the bed, downright exhausted but perfectly contented with the completed piece of costume he laid out nicely on his bed. While he was placing Noiz’s costume beside his, his heard the sound of door opening from the front. His heart skipped a good leap. Rushing out of the room, he saw Noiz taking his shoes off at their front door, only looking up when Aoba stormed his way into the living room.

“What’s the rush?” he smirked.

“N-nothing.”

It wasn’t nothing. Aoba knew it himself, and judging from how Noiz’s smirk had just lifted higher, he knew that Noiz knew it himself too. As he stood rooted on the spot, still pondering on how to go about bringing the suggestion up to Noiz, Noiz had paced towards him, stopping right in front of him before he sneaked his hands around Aoba’s waist just to pull him closer.

“So…” he mumbled fervently. “…what do you have in mind today, huh?”

“W-well…” Aoba stuttered. It was ironic how he could be so fired up throughout the whole preparation process but now that it was finally time for him to spill the beans, he found his words stuck in his throat, his mind in a complicated bunch of jumbled words.

“You’ve been working in your room for the whole time now. Should we go there?” Noiz obviously noticed Aoba’s contradiction. And while Aoba nodded, they both made their way to Aoba’s room, the scene in front of them made Noiz drop his jaw.

“S-sorry, this isn’t something too marvellous…” Aoba said. Where was that confidence he always had when he needed it the most now?

“…You made this?” Noiz asked as he walked towards the two sets of costumes on the bed, gently stroking on Aoba’s set of lab coat, then tracing his fingers along the outline of Aoba’s blue-coloured rabbit head.

“Yeah,” Aoba admitted. “It’s not too well-made as yours, though.”

“It’s amazing,” Noiz complimented. Stepping a step back, he scrutinized both of the costumes, as if he was making a visual comparison in his head. “They look just the same.”

“Ah, well…” Okay, this is starting to become really awkward. Aoba swallowed, then finally taking steps to his boyfriend before he picked Noiz old costume up, swinging it in front of Noiz, the cheeky smile Noiz was so used to back on his features. “May I?”

Noiz grinned. “My pleasure.”

It felt surreal to see Noiz back in his old attire. It reminded Aoba dreadfully of the first time they’d met and now that both of them were in the _same_ attire, standing and staring at each other with an intense wave mingling in the air between them, Aoba couldn’t help but realize how they were both so _similar_ at this stage. Noiz reminded everything about himself – that rebellious age he once gone through. He felt like he’d seen his old self in Noiz and now that Noiz had taken big steps out of his emotional cage, he felt _himself_ becoming more and more like Noiz instead.

Having to go back in time with something that once belonged to the past draped over their skin felt awfully satirical and surreal all the same. While Aoba attempted to put the rabbit head on for Noiz, Noiz stopped him by grasping onto his hand, his eyes lingered on the bandaged fingers.

“This,” he started.

“It’s nothing serious,” Aoba immediately explained. “Just small cuts.”

“Still cuts.”

And before he knew it, he was embraced into one firm hug; Noiz literally carrying him up and escorting him to the bed, where he threw both of them onto the soft material and hovered over Aoba, the expression on his face told Aoba enough that he’d lured the main character of this Halloween out of his young man – the insatiable wolf.

“W-wait! Dinner!” he said agitatedly. They were still both in their costumes and if Aoba was to allow Noiz to take charge of their pace right now, it’d a long time more before they could finally eat their dinner.

“Dinner can wait,” Noiz said, something Aoba would’ve already expected from him. “ _This_ , can’t.” He was pointing at Aoba’s injured fingers. “You did it on purpose, didn’t you? Mr.Rabbit?”

While Aoba surrendered himself to his fate, Noiz searched around his pocket, pulling what seemed like a round-shaped, green candy out of it.

“I got this on the way back just now. Thought you might like it.”

Aoba gaped. As he ogled, Noiz unwrapped the packaging, then creeping the candy close to Aoba’s mouth.

“What’s Halloween without a piece of candy right?” Noiz smirked attractively. “Happy Halloween, Aoba.”

The candy was pushed smoothly into Aoba’s mouth, sweetness spread in his mouth, smearing a thick layer of addictive trance the moment the gift landed on his tongue. It was _so sweet_ that Aoba felt his tongue turned numb after a while of indulging in the taste; all he could do was continued gazing at Noiz when Noiz leaned towards him and started giving him soft kisses along his neck, licking his way down to his collarbone before he raised his body up again, just to see how Aoba was doing.

“How was it?” he asked.

“…Sweet,” Aoba replied, the overwhelming taste had started to conquer his mind. He didn’t know how else to describe the flavour to Noiz. His words failed him, as with every time he was overwhelmed with intense emotions like this.

“Really?” Noiz didn’t really sound like he didn’t believe in Aoba either. In fact, he sounded like he was purposely teasing Aoba and soon enough, Aoba found their lips crashed against each other, Noiz’s tongue ruthlessly intruded the privacy of his mouth as he intertwined their tongues, sporadically sucking roughly on Aoba’s tongue as if he was attempting to suck the saccharinity out of him. If his tongue hadn’t felt numb before, _now_ it felt like he’d lost it once and for all.

“You’re right,” Noiz said between hefty pants. “Sweet.”

Noiz had a soft spot towards sweet things, Aoba had known it ever since he’d come to know him. But Noiz had _something else_ that he held an outright fondness towards too. And it was none other but —

“Aoba,” Noiz called out. He felt like he could kiss Noiz forever, perhaps this time, it could be his turn to suck on Noiz tongue – the only part that Aoba figured to be Noiz’s biggest weakness – just so he could spread the numbness to him; just so he could tell Noiz how great it felt to let loose and simply let themselves drown in sweet ecstasy.

And while Noiz busied himself with memorizing every inch of Aoba’s torso under his fingers, the accumulated frustration throughout the past few days of no intimate interaction between them had gradually popped its head out of his endurance wall. He didn’t Noiz’s alluring smirk to tell him that he was already hard – his body as honest as always - and he didn’t Noiz to point it out to him that he was showing an expression that spelled nothing of want.

Because in any case, he’d just thrown himself at an insatiable wolf, who saw him as the sweetest ecstasy he could ever encounter in his entire life.

And by how he came to realize that they’d be entering another night of extended stupor right now, he was sure that Noiz had waited for this day to come – not only it was because that this day was a say he’d never gotten the chance to celebrate before; but because this day was one of those days when he’d witnessed how Aoba would do things for him and remind him how much he meant to him as well.

That, was the biggest ecstasy he could obtain. Aoba was, indeed, the best Halloween candy Noiz could ever had.

 


	57. Forever & Ever; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being married to each other was one reality that Noiz hadn’t come to acknowledge. But now that this very reality was stepping its way right towards him, there was no way he could look away, let alone suppress that overwhelming emotions that were engulfing him from the inside.

He couldn’t quite believe this was going to happen.

He remembered having these thoughts just few years ago – when he doubted if doing this was the right decision and if this one step would lead them to a path of no return. It took a very long time for him to think through his steps. He no longer held responsibility for he himself only after all. If he was to make this resolution, it’d mean that he’d have to make sure that it was the best he could make for _Aoba_ too.

So, when Aoba ultimately nodded to his proposal, he still found it surreal; like a dream. Having Aoba to stay by his side – when he literally moved his way out of his comfort zone and right into a country that was so very much different from himself  – had been a guilty happiness for him. Having Aoba by his side should be more than enough to him. But he wanted Aoba to have a proper title for himself, not just “someone who stays with me” or “a partner” or even “a lover” sounded insufficient. Aoba had once told him that he wouldn’t mind if they were to get married or not; a title was just a label anyway, and a marriage was just a legally pronounced way of binding them together.

But Noiz _wanted_ to give Aoba exactly that – he never wanted Aoba to be another nomad of this foreign hometown of his. He’d even considered taking Aoba’s family name just so he could make Aoba feel more belonged with him. But obviously, Aoba threw his opinions back at him, telling him that he didn’t need to do too much for him to know exactly how much Noiz cherished this relationship with him. And above all, he wanted Noiz to be completely comfortable with who he was, including his name, his background – _everything_.

He still couldn’t quite believe it when he stood in front of the altar, holding his hands firm as he waited, his breath trapped in his chest. He’d proposed a year before, even though Aoba had outwardly mentioned that he didn’t need to be so worked up on this. But he felt that this was the only thing he could do for Aoba and he wanted so much to tell Aoba that he’d do anything and everything he could just so they could belong exclusively to each other. And even when he’d _really_ proposed, he knew Aoba would agree anyhow, despite brushing off his intention every time he was to hint Aoba about it.

And yet, here he was – still hesitant if he had made the right choice and still pondering if he was _really_ the right person for Aoba.

He let out a small chuckle. If Aoba was to hear this, he’d probably earn himself a smack on the head by now. He understood where Aoba came from – that Aoba had _accepted_ everything of him from the very beginning of their bond. But the biggest demon lied within himself, and if he had the guts to pull Aoba into this lifelong responsibility, he thought he should have the courage to own up to it at the same time.

Taking in a deep breath, he closed his eyes, attempting to soothe the rapid heartbeats beneath his chest. _Everything would be fine_ , he told himself, the chatters around the space gradually vanished into thin air the longer he immersed himself in a realm of self-assurance. _This is real_.

He remembered Aoba’s perky grin when he told him that he wanted to marry him. He remembered Aoba’s teary eyes when he told him that he wanted to hold the responsibility to take care of him for the rest of his life. He remembered Aoba’s stern voice when he pushed himself over the limit, just so he could provide a more comfortable environment for both of them to reside in.

And he remembered Aoba’s strong, determined expression when they first met – one that captivated him effortlessly, and one that told him, from the first day they met, that _this person_ was and would never be _just another passer-by_ in his life, be it being a foe or a friend.

And now, as he allowed his thoughts to overwhelm him, the door to the hall opened, halting every movement, every sound in the space. He opened his eyes. He lied. He wasn’t ready. He told himself he was, _Aoba_ told him he was; that both of them were more than ready. But when the moment trickled its unhurried way towards him, he realized that he was _never_ ready, and he’d probably never be ready for the rest of his life.

Because Aoba was just… such a perfect person, who _accepted_ him, who loved him unconditionally and who told him how to love, how to regain warmth, how to accept being alive again.

Aoba was… everything he ever wanted and everything he wanted to be.

As he turned around, as slow as he could, he heard his heart beating feverishly in his ears, his fingers trembled just ever so slightly, his voice stuck in his throat.

And he thought he’d never seen anything so miraculously _beautiful_ in his entire life before.

Aoba was beautiful, he’d come to acknowledge that ever since they called each other their lovers. Hidden beneath the layer of determination was an essence that was so stunning that sometimes it became too striking for Noiz to take. But he’d come to learn how to embrace it, and when he did, it did wonders to him.

Aoba was… flawless, he already knew about it. But now, in front of his very eyes, was a man that looked so much like an angel it felt unreal.

As Aoba took leisure steps towards him, with a gentle yet genuine smile on his face, Noiz could only stand rooted on the spot, every one of his nerves froze. His husband-to-be had his hair up in a high ponytail. He was wearing a pair of lustrous, white suits that did nothing but enhance his already magnificent aura. His gaze was firm, his smile was beautiful. And with every step he took, Noiz felt as if he was stepping right into his heart, creating a mark that was very much permanent and one that he would never want to lift it off.

“Hey,” Aoba started. He’d come to stand right in front of him, his smile still earnest on his face. Then, as Noiz was about to respond, Aoba let out a chuckle, halting him. “What’s with this, big boy?”

Aoba lifted a hand then, caressing Noiz’s cheek, just for Noiz to realize that tears had streamed down his face without him realizing.

“I think this is the first time I’ve seen you cry,” Aoba teased. But he wasn’t the only one crying. He could see tears threatening to flow down the corner of Aoba’s eyes when he spoke, his thumb gently wiping the tears off Noiz’s face. He never knew how it felt like to cry; or rather, he’d forgotten _how_ to cry, the last time he did was when he was closed up in his room, when he’d decided that crying would lead him nowhere.

But now, as Aoba leaned forward to kiss the trace of dried stain on his cheek, he came to realize that tears were a form of emotional expression – and to have him react in such a way today it could only mean that his emotions were running rampage, that the thought, the reality of _owning_ Aoba and to have Aoba _own_ him was a truth even his emotions found it hard to suppress.

“From today onwards, I’ll wipe your tears off, clean your wounds, join your happiness and sorrow. I’ll face everything with you,” Aoba whispered, pressing their foreheads together. “And you’ll do the same with me, right? No matter ups or downs, we’ll face everything together.”

Noiz nodded. He was at a complete loss of words, but as he swallowed down his throat, he lifted the corners of his lips into a smirk, one that Aoba had come to know very well.

“I promised. And I intend to keep it until the end of my life.”

That was enough. For Noiz, who was once a person who cared of literally nothing but himself; and for him to say such strong proclamation to Aoba, it was already a vow way powerful than Aoba would’ve anticipated it.

They didn’t need marriage, they didn’t need a label to define who they really were. With this very vow alone, it was more than enough.

And as they exchanged kisses in front of the altar, they knew that this was, once again, yet another step they had taken to remind each other that no matter how far they were to stray away from each other – from _home_ – they’d always find their way back – for they had promised each other, and would keep the vow close to their hearts, regardless of time, place, anything.

 


	58. Our Labels; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When they took some time to contemplate the labels they were to put on each other, Noiz and Aoba realized what was that one best label that could ultimately define their positions in each other’s eyes.

[It slipped his ears when Noiz first commented about him acting like a wife](http://shinocchi.tumblr.com/post/106616645714/dramatical-murder-noiz-x-aoba-drama-cd-track-6). Noiz wasn’t sure how he’d first gotten the impression either. But when it came to Aoba, he was no doubt, his very best observer even ever since they first acquainted each other. The words skidded out of his mouth before he could even register them, his mind seemed to be a better judge than his prudence. It’d take more time for himself to organise what he’d just said if Aoba hadn’t returned speedy enough, catching him off guard before he opportunely pulled up a ‘Nothing’, grateful that his wounds were enough of a distraction to keep Aoba from asking more.

Because then, he wouldn’t know how to explain to Aoba even if he was to ask.

Now that he was reminded of his own remark when Aoba was, once again, managing his own wellbeing for him, it got him thinking. Aoba was commendably the best personal caretaker he sought for. But that wasn’t the reason why he brought him over here. He was sure that he could take care of himself if he wasn’t so spoiled by his boyfriend now.

The more he observed, the more the ‘wife’ label grew firmer in his head, even though Aoba _technically_ should be his ‘husband’ if they were to get married – one thought that had never left Noiz ever since the time when Aoba had suggested that their current lifestyle felt like nothing but a pair of newlywed.

The mere thought sent a pang of warmth right into his chest.

Aoba was everything he needed. He took care of him, from his body’s needs to his house’s needs and sometimes it even worried Noiz if he had been properly taking care of himself. He cooked breakfast for them, making sure that Noiz had a cup of his favourite coffee when he woke and sat on the dining table every morning. And when Noiz was away, he made sure that everything in the house was in perfect order – grocery done, laundry done, cleaning up, done. Noiz was _sure_ that he’d never done so many chores like how he did when he was back in Midorijima and it even concerned him if he had been giving Aoba more work than necessary by bringing him over.

But at the same time, he couldn’t deny how amorous he felt from within him when Aoba did all this for him. He was, in fact, like a ‘wife’, or a ‘husband’, but in Noiz’s term – his best lifelong partner.

“Have you ever thought of getting married?” Noiz asked one night, when they were both clean from shower and both laying on the bed, Aoba leaning against Noiz’s shoulder while the other played with the tips of his boyfriend’s hair, eyes staring vacuously right ahead of him.

“Ha?!” Aoba let out a loud shriek. He sat up immediately, sending a frown alongside a pout to Noiz’s direction before he continued. “I thought you said we can’t get married here?”

“Hmmm?” Noiz lifted a suggestive hum. “The way you said it sounds like you want to get married but just because I said we can’t and you really think that we couldn’t.”

“W-wait, wait a minute, you little,” Aoba inched closer, coming eye-to-eye with Noiz. “What’s with this sudden interest?”

“It’s not sudden.” Noiz sat up a tad, just enough to wrap both of his arms around Aoba’s torso, bringing him into a position where they had their chests pressed against each other. “It’s been in my mind all long [ever since you brought it up](http://shinocchi.tumblr.com/post/106495630154/dramatical-murder-noiz-x-aoba-drama-cd-track-3).”

“Ever since I… When did I—oh.” It was amusing how instant Aoba’s reaction could be. The flush that appeared on his face instantaneously giving him out the moment he realized what exactly was Noiz referring to. “It just slipped, okay? I didn’t mean it that way.”

“What? That’s a bit lonely,” Noiz teased purposefully. Again, Aoba’s immediate reaction when his eyes brightened and when his tone sounded all stroppy when he spoke in the next minute had Noiz almost chuckle out loud.

“No, no! You got it all wrong!”

“So, it’s an okay?” Even when he _loved_ teasing Aoba, it still made him feel bad if he was to do it too much. This was perfectly why he loved Aoba, though. He was so easy to read, and so forthright and genuine in every one of his reaction it almost made him into the purest being Noiz had ever have the chance to encounter.

“I…” Aoba looked away, just momentarily. “I mean, like you said. We are already staying under the same roof anyway, and we are going to continue staying together for the rest of our life…”

“You didn’t answer me when I asked you this the other day, though,” Noiz said, swiftly interrupting before Aoba could retort again. “But it’s not too late to hear your answer now anyway.”

Aoba gave up. Burying his head against Noiz’s shoulders, he traced a frisky finger along Noiz’s collarbone, not knowing what else he could say.

“Besides, you’re already acting like one.”

“What?”

“You didn’t realize it yourself?” Noiz said. He didn’t sound visibly astounded, but he was more amused that Aoba hadn’t been acknowledging that very fact when it was so painfully obvious for him. “You do all the housework, cook for us, clean the laundry, you do exactly _everything_ of what a ‘wife’s’ responsibilities should be.”

“Sorry, what did you just call me?” Aoba sat up again. This time, there wasn’t a pout on his face, but there was a grimace.

“…’wife.”

“Say that again.”

“Wife.”

It came snappishly – the smack on his head.

“I’m not a wife,” Aoba’s frown deepened. “I’m just helping you out with your house matters when you aren’t around. Who’s going to do it if not me? And since I’m still owing you money for renting your place, I thought I should at least do something for you as compensation before I could actually pay you back for it.”

“You know you didn’t need to.”

“You can’t stop me.”

He could _never_ win Aoba.

“When I said ‘wife’, though, I didn’t mean it that way,” Noiz said, attempting to clarify. “It means… a different way for me.”

Aoba had always knew that Noiz often found hitches in explaining things for himself. Just like now. Sure, he’d gotten fired up when a label that was undoubtedly hurting his pride was being put on him. He knew Noiz thought of him more than just another ‘partner’. When he mentioned ‘wife’, he must mean a different way. Aoba had a hunch. But he still wanted to hear it from the brat himself.

“Hm? If you don’t explain yourself properly, I’m going back to my own room,” he said, lifting himself up, a clear indication to get off the bed.

“Wait.” Noiz grasped him on the wrist, giving it a small tug. “It’s… something like, I want you to share a name that could make you mine. Does it make sense?”

Even if he wanted to tease Noiz more, his body was too honest for its own good; the heat had escalated to his cheeks before he could answer. Seeing that, Noiz let out a smirk, knowing that he had hit the right button this time.

“Well, if you don’t like to be my wife, how about…” he paused, just to lurch forward so that he could pull Aoba closer. “…would you be my ‘ _husband_ ’ then?”

Aoba swore he could have given him another smack in the head if Noiz wasn’t holding him in such a firm way that he couldn’t even move an inch. Despite his shamelessness, the frantic heartbeats beneath Noiz’s chest had given him out as he returned his boyfriend’s embrace with a stronger one of his own, small giggles leaked out of his lips while he badgered at how shameless his boyfriend could be.

He didn’t mind the label. Every label meant differently to different people. It was especially tricky when it came to Noiz and Aoba – when both of them shared different cultures and that both of them had different thought process ever since when they first met each other. It was even a miracle for Aoba to find themselves being so compatible with each other, in a state they were so comfortable in today. Sure, they quarrelled, they had differing opinions, but those were also the things that had made them stronger with every passing day when they were to share the same ‘home’.

Labels didn’t matter. Noiz could call him his partner, his boyfriend, his fiancé, his husband, or even his wife (which made Aoba cringe a little when he thought about it again), but at the end of the day, what truly mattered to them was how they were referring each other to who they really were – Noiz would always be his adorable brat, and Aoba would always be his ‘Big Brother’ who’d pull him off a chained world he thought he had no power to change.

For them, those would be the only labels they needed – ones that would never change. Ever.

 


	59. Part of Family; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short continuation of Minuscule Bonds.
> 
> When his brother returned with a new person in his life, Theo was both intrigued and curious. And across time, he came to understand why this person was so important to Noiz. Telling from Theo’s POV :)

* * *

The day Brother came back was a day of celebration. Brother, who had been away for years, who appeared at our doorway, standing there in a form that was familiar yet unfamiliar. The mere sight was something way too farfetched to believe in. Brother, who hadn’t been in contact with the family for years, was standing right there – physically.

It was unsightly for him to fall to his knees and started sobbing but it was a kind of tough to brush the overpowering emotions that crashed on him like huge tsunami, wiping him off his senses before he found himself unable to set his eyes on Brother any longer. He felt as if he was looking at a whole new person that he’d never come to know. But as soon as his Brother set eyes on him, he instantly knew that it wasn’t right – this was his Brother, and he’d only come to know _one_ brother in his entire life.

When Brother brought _him_ home, it was, honestly, a huge surprise. The Brother he’d come to know wasn’t one of a great communicator, and definitely wasn’t one who would accept another person in his life so easily. Hence, this new person drew _great_ interest out of him. He’d first heard of him when Noiz was telling his parents over dinner that he’d be inviting someone over to stay with him and that _that_ someone was someone he’d come to appreciate a lot. He presumed that his parents were equally, if not more astonished than him. No one in this house would ever expect Noiz to bring home another person, not when he wasn’t good at making friends in the first place. But they pulled up a smile nevertheless. What was more important now was that Noiz was back, a bit different but definitely in a better state than before. On top of that, he was also _nineteen_ when he returned and all his parents could assume of him was that he was matured enough and had gone through enough ‘lessons’ to know what he was doing.

Theo tried to dig more information out of his Brother, even though he knew that he should take things slow. Noiz never told him too much either, apart from where he’d landed after he left home and why he decided to return. He kept feeling that Noiz was hiding something from him, but it could only be that he wasn’t prepared to tell him yet, and there was no rush anyway.

Noiz was back home now. That should be the only thing that mattered.

The first time he met Noiz’s ‘friend’ was an awkward encounter. He didn’t know what to expect. But the moment he saw him, he immediately pulled up a bright smile, enthusiastically shaking both of his hands as he said,

“I’m Theodore, please call me Theo. Thanks for taking care of my brother when he was in Japan.”

His opponent seemed troubled, and the small reprimand his brother had given him then confirmed it. But regardless, _Aoba_ returned his smile, and at that moment of time, he seemed to realize exactly why this was the person who’d return his brother to him.

Aoba was everything he’d expected him to be – he was very friendly, very nice and very easy to talk to. Although he seemed reserved at some points but Theo could undoubtedly make out how very strong he was. So this was the person who’d changed his brother, he thought. He wouldn’t expect anything less from Aoba. Aoba’s presence itself was more than enough for Theo to understand how incredible a person he was, even though he couldn’t quite explain it himself.

It was after the long conversation with Aoba when he was caught finding for his brother that he finally understood exactly _how_ Aoba had come to be the person his brother cherished so very much now.

Because Aoba was the person who’d forced his way into Noiz’s self-built cage, destroyed the chains that had pulled him down all these while and released him from his own burdens. It was everything Theo had wanted to do but never gotten the chance to. For that, he was extremely grateful towards Aoba. Sure, he was late; but Aoba wasn’t, and he happened to be at the right place at the right time and doing the right thing to have brought about the situation today.

Theo couldn’t even imagine what would happen to his brother if Noiz hadn’t met Aoba in Midorijima,. And for that, nothing would ever be enough to express how thankful he was towards Aoba – a person who he then came to know as someone more than just another friend to his brother.

“When brother talked about you, he always has this… air around him,” Theo had told Aoba. “It’s a very satisfying kind of aura and he’s always smiling when he talks to you. Smile, you know? It’s very rare to see a smile on Brother’s face.”

Aoba didn’t seem like he believed entirely of what he said then but his expression relaxed, his eyes lowered before he let out a smile.

“I see,” was all he said, but was more than enough for Theo to know that he understood perfectly what he was trying to tell him.

Before he knew it, someone else had become better in understanding his own brother than himself. Perhaps it was meant to be after all. Perhaps Noiz _needed_ to leave his family just so he could encounter Aoba and return to be the person he was supposed to be.

Aoba was not only Noiz’s saviour, but _Theo_ ’s as well.

“Thank you very much, Aoba-san.” He knew that no matter how many times he was to express his appreciations, it would never be enough. But he _needed_ to say it. And he knew that Aoba would shake his head and say things like ‘it’s really nothing’ but yet, it meant everything and both of them, along with Noiz, knew it.

Having a new presence by their side was a new experience of its own. Theo never knew much about Aoba; but he wondered a lot about him. Aoba often gave out an easy-going air around him that made interacting to him easy. He was frank, very genuine, and obviously, cared very much at the same time.

It was when Aoba started working in their company that Theo had more chances to communicate with him. At first, he was visibly apprehensive, the twinge of hesitance obvious in his eyes whenever new tasks were placed upon him. But it was a few times when Theo caught him slapping himself on the face in the toilet that told him that despite being thrown into a new environment like that, he was nowhere near giving up.

Sometimes, Aoba reminded him of his own brother.

“Aoba-san, is everything okay?” Theo had asked him over lunch break. Since Noiz was occupied with something else, Theo thought it would be a great time for him to catch up with Aoba.

“Everything’s fine. Thanks to you,” Aoba smiled, a gleeful smile that Theo hadn’t gotten to see very frequently. “Wait, you mean for work, right?”

Theo chuckled. Aoba was simply witty the way he was. “For everything,” he replied.

“Oh,” Aoba let out a small sound, evidently embarrassed before he took a quick sip of his coffee. “Everything’s fine,” he repeated then. “You’re just like your brother. This seems to be your favourite question. Don’t worry about me. I’m an adult, I can manage just this much.”

The pout that Aoba had thrown at his direction was one that was amazingly endearing. The more Theo interacted with Aoba, the more he came to understand exactly _why_ Noiz was so attracted to him. Not only that Aoba often reflected traits that he saw in his own brother, he even came to notice that Aoba possessed traits that filled the gaps his brother very much needed.

“I hope brother is treating you right too. He’s still not very used to communicating with people…” Theo said, lifting his own cup of coffee to his lips.

“Ah, that…” Aoba said, a sudden flush tinted his cheeks, urging Theo to stop his motion. “Don’t worry. I understand that he still needs to get used to being involved with others but…” This time, Aoba had raised his cup up, covering most of his face before he continued, “…he’s been treating me very well.”

Theo didn’t understand the implication of what Aoba meant by that then, but when he ran himself into the situation a few days after, all the clouds in his head were instantly chased away.

“I told you not to do that in the office!”

He was about to knock on his brother’s office door when he froze his hand, confounded by the sudden loud sound from beyond the door. Aoba was visiting, it seems. It’d be best not to disturb them then. He could come back later. But then,

“Ah!”

His paces halted. Did something happen? What was that sound just now? Completely lured by pure curiosity, he leaned towards the door. It wasn’t like he was eavesdropping, he just wanted to make sure that everything was okay.

“Shh, if you make too much noise, people will hear you.”

His brother’s voice was one that he’d _never_ heard before in his entire life. It was low and husky, and even… He gulped. He hadn’t gotten to know a lot about his brother yet and this was one thing that was so out of reach that this might be his only chance to grasp it.

“I said, don’t do it here. What if someone comes in?” Aoba was whispering in a very low voice, and Theo had to literally press his ear against the door to hear every word clearly.

“Just a quick one.”

One exasperated phrase, then the sounds of fumbling clothing that eventually led to the sound of zippers being pulled open and ultimately one thud that was something being placed on a solid surface were all Theo needed to know about what _exactly_ was happening beyond this door.

Sure, he knew that his brother and Aoba shared a relationship that was more than just friends. And he knew, and _confirmed_ that they were a pair of lovers. But this situation was something that he’d _never_ imagined before in his entire life.

It was pure curiosity that was driving him now, and right after he heard soft moans, followed by wet sounds from beyond the door, he straightened himself up, face completely flushed red before he turned his heels and left the door.

It was inappropriate to eavesdrop, he told himself, despite how curious he could be. It was something that both his brother and Aoba would never tell him but this was too much information anyway. He wouldn’t expect them to.

It was hard looking into Aoba’s eyes the next time they met.

“Aoba-san,” he called out, when they were, once again, sharing the same table over lunch. “Brother really treats you very well.”

“Huh?” Aoba threw him a curious pair of gaze, before he broke into a bright smile again. “Yeah, he really does.”

There were a lot of things that he had yet to know about his brother and also Aoba, but, like he’d said before, there was always a very similar air around them when they were to talk about each other – that blithe, burden-less air that never failed to lift the mood up. His brother had returned to him, to his family, with a new person in his life.

And this new person – Aoba – had and was undoubtedly playing the most important role in Noiz’s life. Regardless of what his past could be or even what his present obstacles would be, Theo knew that history would never repeat itself again.

Because Noiz had Aoba now, and him, of course, who would always support his good big brother despite the hardships they were to face now and in the future.

Because brothers stayed by each other’s side for life. And if Noiz could do that for him, he could too.

 


	60. Make A Wish; Koujaku/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba found hope his own way.

He’d encountered solitude. It wasn’t something foreign for him – loneliness had been his best friend for as long as he could remember; ever since he was abandoned in the church by the seaside, he’d long acknowledged that he was unwanted, that he was fated to be by himself for the rest of his life. He’d recognized the fact that he was weird, that he was different from the others. He didn’t ask to be born like that, and for the most of this life, he’d wanted to change himself as much as he could just so he could fit in.

When he was adopted by the Seragaki family and was given a name – _Aoba_ – he thought that he was no longer alone, that he could finally fit himself into this place where he could call a family. His parents and his grandmother were the biggest emotional support he could get hold of and he believed in them. The next time he ran into solitude again was when he witnessed his parents’ departure right in front of his eyes. He thought he’d gained hope; but he lost it again, just like that.

It was a crush of hope; he no longer wanted to rely on anyone for his own happiness.

He’d expected the group of bullies to laugh at him and bully him when he first bumped into them. He was _weird_ after all and it shouldn’t come as a surprise. So even when he was bullied and when he experienced pain so excruciatingly painful he could do nothing but cry and pray that they’d stop soon. He hoped he was stronger so that he was able to defend himself better; but both his physique and strength were his biggest weaknesses and there was nothing he could do to change that.

He’d given up hope; or so he thought, if Koujaku hadn’t jumped into the scene out of the blue, he was _sure_ that he’d live his life under other’s shadows for the rest of his life.

He never expected anyone to come for his rescue; he didn’t deem himself worthy of such rescue. But Koujaku shielded him all the same. And as he stood behind the shadow of this stranger he had yet to know the name, he almost thought that it was fine to pick up hope again.

“Are you okay?” The boy’s voice wasn’t as gravelly as he’d expected it to be. Despite being way deeper than his, the concern from within was too hard for him to miss and all he could do was gaping at the man – his _hero_ – until the boy waved a hand in front of his eyes, bringing him back to reality.

“I’m… okay,” he muttered, no longer able to see the boy in his eyes. The boy gave out a loud laugh then. Ruffling him on the hair, he squatted, coming on the same eye level as him as he pinched him on the nose.

“Are you hurt anywhere?” the boy asked again and he hoped so very much for this moment to remain as such. He didn’t want to hope again; he was afraid of losing hope. _Again_. But at this very moment, as he looked up into the perky smile the boy was giving him, he thought that was the best personification of hope he could ever attain.

The boy had been nothing but compassionate to him. He was almost delightful when he realized that he was a neighbour of his, greatly pulling their distance closer despite him hiding behind his grandmother’s body the whole time they were introducing him to the other.

He almost forgotten his name, only remembered it when he was laying alone in his dark room, when the flash of red was too prominent for him to miss – and when he closed his eyes, all he could see was the boy’s – _Koujaku_ ’s – optimistic smile when he looked at him, giving him a sense of assurance and also a new sense of anticipation.

He couldn’t wait to see Koujaku again. Koujaku – the only person who’d treated him like a normal person besides his family.

Koujaku had always been cheerful whenever they spent their time together. Koujaku had always made sure that he was well taken care of, even though he wasn’t sure if he was doing it out of his grandmother’s courtesy or if he genuinely and willingly wanted to do this for him. But regardless, whenever Koujaku came into his line of sight, he couldn’t help but return the brightest, most sincere smile he could muster on his face as he made rapid paces towards him, wanting to feel the sense of belonging once again – one that he’d missed when his parents were still around.

Koujaku had never seen him as anything else but a friend; Koujaku might even be his _first_ friend. And he was grateful that it was _Koujaku_ that he was bonded with despite all the nasty hardships he had to go through in order for him to achieve this state.

In due course, he picked up hope again. He believed in Koujaku; he knew that Koujaku would be the person who’d pull him out of the darkness he was once in ever since he’d lost his parents.

There were a lot of things he loved to do with Koujaku – he loved it when Koujaku stayed with him until late night in his house while they waited for his grandmother to come back; he loved it when Koujaku would wrap him into a safe embrace when thunderstorms vibrated noisily outside his room’s window.

He loved Koujaku’s warmth; he loved Koujaku’s hands when he held his in his. He loved how Koujaku could effortlessly made him feel secure just like that – simply by _existing_.

It was all that he could ever ask for.

“This one is for you.”

Koujaku had stayed back with Aoba one late evening while they waited for his grandmother. While Aoba was having his own fun time playing with sand in the sand pit, Koujaku had tapped him on his shoulder, then pushing a red-coloured paper crane into his hand.

“What is this?” he asked, completely abandoning the sandcastle he’d built and focusing his attention on the new item instead.

“They said if you make one hundred of these, whatever wish you make will come true,” Koujaku said with a bright grin.

“Really?!”

“Do you have a wish?” Koujaku asked then, immediately eliciting a difficult look out of his face.

“Hmmmm,” he thought. He’d never think much about wishes. If he ever had one, that’d be…

“I want Koujaku to stay with me forever!” he said without a second thought.

Koujaku almost choked himself. A loud laugh later, he ruffled him on the hair, still snickering as he said,

“I won’t go anywhere.”

But that was a lie.

When he watched Koujaku’s back going further down the road, he knew that he was losing hope once again. He thought that he’d finally be happy, that this was finally the end to his misery.

But now…

The tears wouldn’t stop, creating wet stain on the paper crane Koujaku had given him. He clutched it snugly in his hands, praying hard for Koujaku to come back, for everything to be just another nightmare.

But Koujaku never came back.

…not until almost a decade later that he found himself gaping at the door, staring incredulously at the man in red-coloured kimono in his living room. He couldn’t quite believe what was happening. He thought he was encountering another dream again but yet..

_But yet_.

“What are you thinking about, Aoba?”

Koujaku walked out of the bathroom, a towel over his head as he paced towards Aoba, who was sitting at the edge of the bed, been zoning off for the past hour.

“Ah, nothing,” Aoba quickly said, attempting to keep whatever he was holding in his hand away from Koujaku’s sight but he was two seconds too late before Koujaku gave him an impish smirk as he joined him on the bed, eyeing his hand suspiciously.

“What are you hiding from me?”

“Nothing!”

“You sure?”

He would’ve brought up a better fight if Koujaku hadn’t played dirty on him.

“Hahahahaha, stop, stop! That’s unfair!”

Aoba rolled on the bed. Koujaku had launched himself at him, catching him completely off guard as he kicked into thin air, attempting to struggle himself off Koujaku.

“That’s because you aren’t telling me what’s up your sleeve,” Koujaku smiled roguishly, finally stopping his tickle attacks.

“Fine, fine!” Aoba pouted, taking his hand out and let out a relieved sigh the moment he noticed that the item he had been hiding was unspoiled and untorn.

“What’s that?”

As soon as Aoba held it up for Koujaku to see, Koujaku’s eyes brightened. In Aoba’s hands was a red-coloured paper crane, one that he had a vague memory of – and one that reminded him affectionately of the one promise he’d made for himself years back.

“They said that if you make one hundred of these, whatever wishes you make will come true,” Aoba started, leisurely but determinedly. “I’ve only made one but I want you to keep this.”

“What’s this all about?” Koujaku asked, receiving the item from Aoba.

Aoba turned his back towards him then, but he wasn’t quick enough to hide the flush on his face from Koujaku as the other’s grin broadened, no longer able to hide the intense happiness within him.

“I hope my wish comes true this time,” Aoba mumbled. Without warning, he felt a weight from behind him, hugging him firm in an embrace before he heard a soft voice by his ear, one that he was so extremely fond of; and one he was so very familiar with.

“Of course. I promise.”

They never believed in superstitions; at least not Aoba. But he believed in Koujaku. And he knew that Koujaku was the same too.

This time, he was sure that this hope of his was eternal; and that this wish of him would come true. He’d make sure of it.

 


	61. Startover; Koujaku/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba could never understand why Koujaku decided to join a Rib team. He thought Koujaku was against violence and physical confrontations. But what else he could do as a friend of Koujaku?

When the news of Koujaku being in a Rib team reached his ears, all Aoba could do was gape at the new information, completely hesitant of how he should react. Koujaku was the last person he’d see being involved with a Rib team, let alone being _in_ one. For a while, a sense of uncertainty simmered from within him. He thought he didn’t know Koujaku after all, that whatever he knew of Koujaku was simply a deception he conjured up for himself. At times, he wanted to ask Koujaku for more, specifically on his decision, but at most times, he found himself swallowing the words back even before they could make it to his tongue. There must be _something_ about Koujaku that he’d never come to know, despite them being each other’s best friend for the longest time ever. That thought made him feel unbelievably insecure. He _thought_ he knew Koujaku enough. He _thought_ Koujaku was against violence and injustice and he _thought_ Koujaku would put a ten foot pole in between himself and whatever vehement activities Midorijima could suggest.

But obviously, all his thoughts were his own one-sided phantasm after all. Perhaps he didn’t know Koujaku as much as he _thought_ after all.

Despite that, when Koujaku finally broke the ice at him, he could only stare dumbfounded at him, gaping at him the same way as how he’d gawped at him when he stood in his doorway after years of separation. He wasn’t going to demand for an explanation from Koujaku. Who was he to ask for a clarification anyway? He was just Koujaku’s _friend_ and the best he could do was to make sure that Koujaku kept himself in a harmless distance between vigorous activities and that should be the limit of his capability as a _friend_. So instead, he gave Koujaku a smile, patted him on the shoulder and, sarcastically, said to him: “Well, do what you want to do, but don’t come crying home when someone hits you too hard, okay?”

He meant what he said. But, being the natural worrywart he was, he soon found himself perking his ears on all and _any_ activities Koujaku’s team – which he later on came to know as “Benishigure” – was doing, only releasing a sigh of relief when he found out that all the Rib team did was helping the bullied out of being bullied. He didn’t know what he was expecting from a Rib team, he’d never wanted to be part of it. His impression towards them had always been “a bunch of delinquents who has too much of free time in their hands”. But now that Koujaku was being part of one, his perception changed; perhaps just a little.

“Seriously, stop worrying too much,” Mizuki had said to him on one fine day when he dropped by Black Needle after work, once again, trying to find out more information about what Benishigure was doing. “Koujaku and his team has been doing fine, they aren’t doing anything beyond the limit.”

Aoba sighed. He didn’t even know what said “limit” was. All he knew was it involved being involved in brutal physical activities and he didn’t like the sound of it at all, even more so when it was concerning his dear friend.

“I’ll look after him but…” Mizuki paused, flicking a playful smirk at Aoba before he continued. “I don’t think Koujaku needs it anyway. His team is growing fast. They’ll be on par with Dry Juice’s standard sooner or later.”

Aoba let out another loud sigh. Who was he to stop Koujaku from doing what he desired to do anyway? He just… couldn’t quite understand why Koujaku had chosen this path. But like Mizuki said, perhaps he could let both himself and Koujaku loose for a bit. Koujaku was a _friend_ , nothing more. And a friend should support his friend regardless of his decision.

It was three months after Benishigure became full of zip that Aoba started to calm the edginess within him down for just a tad. Like Mizuki had assured him every time they met, Koujaku was doing pretty well, and he was noticeably more jovial than before, which should be a good news of its own. Aoba had heard of physical confrontations between different Rib teams but it seemed that Koujaku had been handling those fairly well as well, so, he literally had _nothing_ to worry about at any rate.

Except if Koujaku could stop averting the topic of Rib with him. He knew Koujaku didn’t want him to worry too much about him, but Aoba couldn’t help but feel suspicious, as if Koujaku was hiding something from him. He wanted to dismiss that thought but his hunch had never failed him and especially when it came to Koujaku, he _knew_ that he’d be right about him no matter what instinct he was to get.

When the qualms hit its boiling point, Aoba finally decided to take his own initiative, marching right up to Koujaku’s house the moment he got off work few days after he was being troubled by an uneasy doubt. He didn’t tell Koujaku about his spur-of-the-moment visit and if Koujaku wasn’t around to answer his calls then he could just turn back home, the distance between their houses wasn’t that far anyway.

The inside of Koujaku’s house was dim when Aoba walked up to his front door. Thinking that perhaps he really caught him at the wrong time, Aoba stood in front of the door regardless, refusing to give up his chance. He knocked, once, then twice. He _swore_ he could hear movement from beneath the door.

“Koujaku?” he called out. “It’s me.”

Now he was _sure_ that someone was inside. He heard soft yet hurried footsteps, then, the door swung open, revealing a Koujaku in his casual wear.

“Hey,” Aoba smiled. “Not working today?”

“Ah…” Koujaku looked troubled, and for some reason, he was hiding his right hand out of Aoba’s view. “Thought of taking a break once a while.”

“Taking a break is good,” Aoba agreed. “So, aren’t you going to invite me in?”

“O-oh…”

Well, Koujaku seemed _really_ out of himself today. Fixing his gaze on him for the entire time, Koujaku finally took a step back, allowing Aoba’s entrance.

The moment he stepped into the house, Aoba dropped his jaw. Bandages scattered all over the floor; some were blood-stained, some were new. There was a box of first-aid kit on one side, its tools out and used.

“Koujaku…” Aoba trailed off. When he turned around, Koujaku turned his head away, clearly averting Aoba’s eyes. “What happened?”

He didn’t need to ask what happened to know exactly _what_ happened. The blood stains were fresh, and judging by the way Koujaku was hiding his arm, he already _knew_ that his intuition was right after all.

Rushing towards Koujaku, he pulled his arm out, his strength a bit too hard for an injured person.

“Ouch! Hey, Aob—“

“What’s this?” Aoba squinted at the exposed arm. There was a long cut that stretched from Koujaku’s elbow to his palm. It looked like an extremely nasty cut made by a sharp object, presumably a dagger or a penknife.

“It’s… an accident,” Koujaku started. He seemed to be working his brain out to pull himself out of the situation but one deep frown from Aoba was all he needed to break the tension between them. Sighing, he placed a hand on top of Aoba’s before he continued. “It was a fight in the afternoon. Our base was assaulted by another Rib team.”

Aoba felt his heart skip a beat. “Assault” – he didn’t like the word _at all_ ; that was perfectly the reason why he didn’t want to be involved with _any_ Rib activities at all, he didn’t even want his _friends_ to be a part of it.

Koujaku’s blood dripped from its open wound, trickling its way along Koujaku’s skin and eventually staining Aoba’s hand. Aoba trembled from the wet sensation. He hated this. If there was _one_ thing he could do for Koujaku, it was definitely to stop him from getting more scars than necessary on his body. But he wasn’t capable in doing so. Not even knowing what had happened or what Koujaku had been doing all this while, all he could do was observe unobtrusively from the side line. And, like now, watched Koujaku getting wounded and only tending to him when things were too late.

“A-Aoba…?” Perplexed by Aoba’s sudden silence, Koujaku called out quietly, his tone wary.

“Do you always get into _assaults_ like this?” Aoba asked, his voice equally quiet as Koujaku’s.

“…Once in a while. But we can handle it, it’s no big deal, Aoba. It’s part of being in a Rib team, there’s nothing to freak out—“

“Of course I’m freaking out, you’re my _friend_!” Aoba exploded. Did Koujaku never once considered the fact that simply because Koujaku was his _friend_ that he was being so concerned towards him? Did it never occurred to Koujaku that simply because Koujaku was his _friend_ that he couldn’t let this slip _just like that_?

“Aoba…” Koujaku was obviously surprised. “Don’t worry, I’m used to this, it should heal in no—“

“’ _Used to it_ ’?” Aoba growled under his breath. “Listen, Koujaku. I don’t care how many more fights you’re going into after this but please, _please_ , remember to not take it so recklessly. You’re in a _team_ , you don’t have to fight alone.”

For a long while, both of them only stared at each other, before Aoba broke the tension between them and pulled Koujaku into the room by the wrist.

“Whatever your decision is,” he said, settling both himself and Koujaku on the floor where the first-aid kits were. “I’ll not stop you from doing what you want to do. I won’t ask you why you want to do this but I’ll listen if you want to tell me why. However,” giving Koujaku a stern stare, he picked one roll of bandages up and shunted it in front of Koujaku’s face. “I’ll claim the privilege to tend to your wounds if you are to act so recklessly like this again. Understand?”

Koujaku would never stop Aoba from doing what he wanted to do. Even if Aoba was to ask him why he choose to join a Rib team, he was sure that he’d tell him anyway. All this while, his intention had always been to keep Aoba out of troubles. The lesser he knew, the less involved he’d be. And wasn’t that what Aoba wanted after all? But as Aoba wrapped his wounds with a frown and unmistakable misery on his face, he thought that perhaps he’d given himself the wrong impression all this time. That perhaps Aoba would want to be involved if it was concerning his _friend_.

Letting out a small smile, he simply allowed Aoba to grumble his dissatisfaction while he took care of his wounds. The scar didn’t hurt; rather, what hurt him more was that he’d unintentionally hurt Aoba with his one-sided thought.

And perhaps, he should really open himself more to Aoba now. At least, for things he knew he could disclose.

 


	62. Continue; Koujaku/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a tradition to watch horror movies during Halloween.

They never knew what Halloween was; or rather – the concept of Halloween always sounded like a faraway tale, one that had absolutely no relations whatsoever with them. But ever since Koujaku became closer to Aoba over the times when he was asked to take care of the younger neighbour when Tae went out for errands, Halloween slowly but surely became one festive season that, even though he had completely no idea what it was notable for at that age that young, he was sure that it had something to do with “scaring people” or “being scared by people”. He wasn’t fond of the idea of having to scare others, nor did that was he intrigued by being frightened himself. But _Aoba_ seemed to have stuck his eyes on such a foreign delicacy when they passed by a shop with a whole load of candies capturing Aoba’s attention. And it was _Aoba_ ’s jovial “let’s celebrate Halloween” that had Koujaku ultimately submit to his interest, attempting hard to wipe the hesitance off within him before he joined Aoba in stacking a whole basket of candies for themselves.

He still remembered it very clearly – the first ever time they celebrated Halloween, it was in Aoba’s house, when thunderstorm howled outside their windows and Tae was out late for errands once again. Aoba was never a fan of bad weathers, and the chilliness of the wind made Koujaku feel as if they were really stepping into a season of terror. But seeing Aoba being petrified made _him_ feel protective instead and before he knew it, he held a candy up at the other, bracing a wide smile on his face before he spoke,

“Let’s celebrate Halloween?”

He had absolutely _no idea_ on how one celebrated Halloween. But he’d read somewhere that they were supposed to do something creepy and the scariest thing he could think of now was to watch something terrifying. It wasn’t safe to leave the house either – assuming that the bad weather was going to stretch through the night – and they had nothing else they could do in the house besides cuddling under the blanket. Naturally, it left them with the only choice that Koujaku had in mind.

He would _never_ forget the dismayed look on Aoba’s face the first time they celebrated Halloween in the Seragaki household, where Aoba stared, stoned cold, at the television screen, every one of his nerves seemed to have frozen until Koujaku patted him carelessly on the shoulder that he let out an ear-splitting scream and throttled into his room, as fast as lightning.

* * *

The next time he walked into Koujaku’s room, it was pitch-black. Wind blew into the room, creating an eeriness in the space that had Aoba shiver out of reflex. It seemed like there wasn’t anyone in the room, but for some reason, Aoba _knew_ that it wasn’t true.

“Koujaku…?” he whispered as he took wary steps into the room, looking around and hearing his heart beating stridently in his ears. He was about to reach for the lights when he saw a shadow from the corner of his eyes, freezing every one of his motion before he turned, as slowly as he could, at the source of movement.

“Aoba!”

“Woahhh!” His throat sored from the scream. Almost flinging his bag at the sound, he hastily stepped a few paces back, feeling his waist hitting the corner of Koujaku’s cabinet before he stared, horrified at the dark, big shadow in front of him.

“Oh no, I’m sorry.”

It took a few moments but the instant he calmed down, a deep pout made its way to his features, urging him to storm towards his childhood friend and, this time, flung the bag right at his face.

“ _How dare you_ ,” he gritted the words through his teeth. “I thought I’m going to _die_!”

“You won’t die from being scared,” Koujaku retorted with a bitter smile, one hand massaging the spot where Aoba had just smacked him, another on his hip.

“And what are you doing in the dark?!” Aoba roared, still trying to calm his rampant heartbeats down. “Are you into some play or something?”

Truth be told, he wasn’t exactly infuriated at Koujaku. He was traumatised, and pushing that nerves out of his throat seemed to be the most effective way for him to get rid of the tension in his blood.

Koujaku, though, remained silent for the most time. While he waited for Aoba to contain his own nerves, he stretched a hand towards the younger man, a smile now replaced his initial sullenness before he spoke,

“Come here.”

If there was _one_ thing Aoba knew about Koujaku it was exactly how Koujaku always knew the right and most effective way to calm Aoba down. It reminded him of when they were young – when he used to hide under the bed during bad weathers, when Tae was still not home in the late night and when icy chills ran down his spine when he heard something from the corner of the house whenever he was left alone. Koujaku’s presence in his life had given him a new support, one that he’d lean against whenever he was caught in fright. And now, while he squinted his eyes through the darkness, he could clearly see Koujaku’s warm smile, and Koujaku’s gentle gaze that was more than enough to light the gloomy space up.

That was enough, Aoba thought. He grasped onto Koujaku’s hand, still evidently displeased with the prank Koujaku had played on him before he allowed the other to escort him over to the couch, where the television was on, black on the screen.

“What are you doing?” Aoba asked when Koujaku sat beside him, hand still on his face while he struggled to find the remote control in the dark.

“We’re continuing a tradition,” he answered docilely, then pressing a play button on the remote control.

“…Tradition?”

“It’s Halloween today, Aoba. I know we don’t celebrate it here but,” he paused, taking one dainty breath before he continued. “It’s not easy taking that image of yours off my head when we first attempted to celebrate it.”

He didn’t need to see Koujaku’s face to know that he was smirking, his thoughts probably already found their way back to time. And for all Aoba knew, regardless if he was to follow this tradition or not, he was sure that he’d regret it if he didn’t voice his objection out now.

But he didn’t. And he knew why. There was nothing to be afraid of. Not now, not ever. Because whatever was to happen, Koujaku would be here with him to comfort him anyhow.

Just like how he did when they were younger.

 


	63. Affectionate; Koujaku x Aoba

It usually took more than sweet talking and affectionate touches to get Aoba all riled up. The main key to expose a completely affectionate Aoba would be time and Koujaku didn’t mind it. He wouldn’t mind spending as long as he could to get Aoba into the mood, just so Aoba was completely comfortable with him. 

Today, though… With his back pressed against the bedhead, all his motions constrained by the way his lover was kneeling in between his legs, his head locked in place by a pair of small yet warm hands, all he could do was stare right into the light-brown eyes of his lover, completely awestruck at how amazingly _affectionate_  Aoba was at this very moment.

“I really do love you, you know that?” Was it alcohol? He could smell a faint scent of alcohol surrounding them, thicker when Aoba spoke. He had no idea where and why would Aoba consume alcohol at this hour of time, but this situation wasn’t something he minded either.

“Yeah, I kno–”

“Shhh,” Aoba pressed a finger against his lips, darting his tongue out to lick on his own lips before he lifted a provocative smirk. “I’m not done with talking.”

Koujaku zipped his mouth. He welcomed this sudden upfrontness, of course. In fact, he wished he could record this down so that he could revisit it when insecurity started hitting him out of nowhere again. But now, he only had his five senses to rely on.

“I don’t like how you’re always mingling with women but I know it’s your job and I don’t want to cause you any troubles.” Well, they had this conversation before. Koujaku thought they’d settled whatever discontentment between them but obviously, it remained a tied knot within Aoba. It wasn’t like Koujaku minded, though. In fact, it made him… happy, just a tad. “But you know that I love you, right? I don’t want to be separated from you again.”

He thought perhaps he could at least say something. But the moment he intended to do so, Aoba had lurched forward, pressing his lips against his, pushing all the words back down his throat. 

Aoba was adorable; even at times like these, even when he was doing something that he so wasn’t used to, he still beared the shadow of his childhood Koujaku was so very familiar with. Wrapping his body with his own pair of arms, he returned Aoba’s fervour, deciding that words weren’t needed from him, at least for now.

 


	64. Interference; Koujaku x Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Koujaku never held any positive impressions towards Noiz, the idea of getting along with him gave him a bad taste in his mouth. But he was proven wrong - by none other but himself.

_Rhyme_. It was something he was never fond of. As with any other Rib teams, he merely found the game an unnecessary destruction to the brain. It was an activity he could never understand the appeal of. Things that weren’t tangible gave him a very unscrupulous feeling – they were unreliable, they were unhelpful, and more importantly, they were unguaranteed. They were just things that would vanish as one did as much as blink. And he _loathed_ that feeling. He never wanted to feel insecure at all, he already had enough on his shoulders to burden him for the rest of his life.

He never wanted to be part of any Rhyme activities – that was the promise he had given himself. In fact, if he could even prevent his team members from the seduction of very unrealistic assurances this brain game could give them, he’d do everything he could to make sure that Rib would still be their first choice when it came to deciding a path to follow.

Encountering Noiz had brought his perception into a gradual but crucial turn of course. He wasn’t enraged by the fact that Noiz was a Rhyme player at first; but rather, he was exasperated by the fact that this seemingly young and immature man had interfered with _Aoba_ ’s life that had twitched every one of his nerves. He didn’t want to have _anything_ to do with this man at all and he often presumed that he was just another brat that knew nothing of respect – someone that he’d disregard as soon as they resolved their intricate matters.

But instead, for some reason, he found himself couldn’t keep his eyes off the man; there was just _something_ about him that had drawn Koujaku to him as if he was another side of his magnet.

He didn’t want to have anything to do with Rhyme; and he didn’t want to have anything to do with _Noiz_.

And that was exactly why he found himself gaping at the expanding Rhyme field before his very eyes when he opened his eyes after what he thought was a good night sleep. He’d never been in a Rhyme field before, let alone knowing _why_ he was here in the first place. The field was a spread of red, which reminded him agonizingly of the sea of blood that was still creeping around in the corner of his memory up to this date. He looked around, attempting to seize any sign of life before his hand instinctively rose to grab his sword the moment he saw a shadow moving swiftly towards his way.

The moment he saw exactly what – or rather, _who_ – the shadow was, his eyes brightened, his mouth hanging open, the grip he had on his sword handle relaxed and all he could do was stare at the way the _man_ made his way towards him.

“Yo.”

It was _him_.

“Wh…”

“I would never expect myself to see you here,” the man said with a defiant grin, reminding Koujaku critically of himself before he had to remind himself that _this man_ was, in fact, _him_. But there was something that wasn’t quite right with this man – it didn’t feel like he was entirely him; there was something _different_ about him, something that drew a line between himself and the man despite knowing that this man was him himself.

“This might come as a surprise but you’re probably right about what you’re thinking of me – but to be more precise: I’m you, just perhaps ten years older.”

Koujaku’s jaw dropped. _That_ was why this man was so similar yet so different from him.

“What business do you have with me?” Koujaku asked. He wasn’t sure if this was an enemy or a friend and all he could do was invigorating his defence high just to make sure that he had himself under control despite how surreal the situation was now.

“We need to talk,” the other _Koujaku_ said. Shifting his gaze around the space, the older _Koujaku_ let out a small smile, then directing his attention back to the Koujaku, who was still in awe. “Rhyme… What an ironic encounter, isn’t it?”

Well, if this person was him, surely he’d be able to sense the waves of uncertainty within him that had been bugging him for the longest time ever now. Perhaps _this man_ could give him the answer to all the unanswered qualms he had been holding towards himself at long last.

“You never liked Rhyme, right?” _Koujaku_ asked, immediately waking Koujaku’s brain gear up. “And you never liked Noiz.”

The sole mention of _Noiz_ ’s name had Koujaku’s heart skipping a beat, for reasons he himself couldn’t rationalize.

“But things will change.” The corner of _Koujaku_ ’s lips curved higher.

“How?” Koujaku asked. He shouldn’t be asking a question; and even if he did, he was asking the wrong question – it shouldn’t be ‘How’, it should be ‘ _Why_ ’ instead. But the other _Koujaku_ merely smiled at him, as if he had seen through his thoughts.

“How are you dealing with him, though?” _Koujaku_ returned his ‘how’ to him, catching Koujaku off guard.

“What do you mean?”

“What do you think about him?”

He had a gut feeling that this _Koujaku_ was attempting to understand _himself_ better by posing him a question to a _himself_ that was once oblivious about how to define the unsettling emotions beneath his chest.

“I don’t like him,” Koujaku said, completely blunt.

_Koujaku_ let out a loud laugh then, one that reverberated around the space. “Figures.”

“Why do you ask?”

Instead of answering him, _Koujaku_ simply gave him a look that shouted nothing but affection. And before he could even respond, _Koujaku_ had come closer to him, patting him on the shoulder and giving him a gentle smile at the same time.

“I used to think like that too,” he confessed. “A good-for-nothing brat who does nothing but wasting his life on useless brain-damaging games instead of serving for the better good, right?”

Koujaku scowled. He definitely didn’t appreciate having his thoughts being spoken out in such a vulnerable way like this.

Ultimately, he let out a sarcastic laugh, brushing the older _Koujaku_ ’s hand off his shoulder before he returned the other’s gaze with a piercing stare.

“Yeah, he’s a brat. And I don’t care about him.”

“Sure,” _Koujaku_ closed his eyes, smiling as he did. “He’s a brat, but you cared about him.”

He felt it again – the skip in his heart.

“I used to think like that too. Probably you wouldn’t like hearing this from me but… things will change. Both of you have more things in common than you think.”

_Koujaku_ was right – he certainly _didn’t_ like hearing this. He _never_ wanted to have anything to do with Rhyme, let alone with _Noiz_.

“This is the proof,” _Koujaku_ continued, staring around the space once again. “Eventually, you’ll come to accept Rhyme more than you do now; and before you know it, you’ll come to like Noiz as well.” He paused, casting a calm yet provocative look at Koujaku. “… more than you think you ever would.”

He wanted to say something else; probably something against this _Koujaku_ ’s thoughts. But _this person_ was him in ten years’ time. If he was to say so, it could only mean that it was the truth – that whatever this man was telling him had already happened.

Was it possible for him to get closer to Noiz, to understand him better? And was it even possible for him to come to _like_ him?

Before he could clear his own chaotic thoughts, the space around him gradually fade into white. And before he knew it, he was laying on his own bed, eyes staring vacuously at the ceiling above him.

It was just a dream, he concluded. None of whatever he had just seen was possible; there was no way he could believe that he’d just met his _future self_ , let alone believing him that he’d come into good terms with Noiz in the long run.

Letting out a stretch, he dragged himself off the bed, pondering about an early begin of the day. He didn’t feel superbly sick from the surreal dream, but, even though he refused to acknowledge it, he was sure that _something_ had changed from the usual perception he held towards Noiz.

He probably needed some time to calm his thoughts down and to reconsider the situation he was vehemently dragged into. But it seemed that time wasn’t by his side this time. As he walked his way out of his house and into the barely awake streets, he froze in his steps when he caught a glance of green. He had yet to confront this new-rise emotions within him, and the moment the other man came face-to-face with him, for the first time ever, he lost his words, didn’t even manage to throw any insults out at the other.

“Yo.”

He was still the same – still so immature, still so young, _but yet_ , there was something _different_ about him that Koujaku hadn’t be able to see in the past.

“Hey,” he responded. And when the other man gave him a smile – one that was the most genuine he’d seen from him ever since he had come to know him – he knew that he was simply returning _his_ smile, one that was probably equally genuine as the one he was wearing now.

 


	65. Unchanged; Koujaku/Aoba/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What if one day Noiz turns into a toddler and Koujaku and Aoba have to take care of him for a day, or a half?

They thought it was a hallucination; or so they wished.

When they opened the door to Noiz’s apartment two hours after he’d missed an important appointment with them, they could only stare, jaw dropping, at the sight in front of them. Noiz’s front door was unlocked, his shoes placed neatly by the shoe rack – an obvious sign that he was in the house. There weren’t any sounds from beneath the door at all and it took one hesitant nod between Koujaku and Aoba before they finally pushed the door open.

At first, they thought that they were wrong, that there _really_ wasn’t anyone at home but as they squinted through the darkness, the realized that there was in fact, _someone_ in the house and that _someone_ happened to be someone that they’d never once imagined to meet in their life.

“Are you sure Noiz is not married?” Koujaku asked warily, his voice so soft but yet it vibrated so clearly in Aoba’s ear that had Aoba swallow down his throat, trying to make sense of what he was seeing in front of him.

“I’m hundred percent sure,” Aoba whispered back, as if afraid that any volume louder than this would wake whatever contained in the small bundle in front of him.

“Then how do you explain this?” Koujaku pointed at the item. “You sure this isn’t his son or anything?”

Aoba swallowed again, eyes fixed on the pile of cloth before he took a step forward, stopping only when the thing _moved_.

Both he and Koujaku froze. Shooting each other an indecisive look, they nodded. Aoba stretching out first, slowly taking the cloth they recognized as Noiz’s clothing off the moving item while Koujaku stood behind, hands clenched into fists and all prepared to draw his sword in case he needed to launch an attack.

The next thing they saw froze all of their movements. In front of them was a three-year-old toddler, who was soundly asleep and only fidgeted slightly when Aoba pulled the clothing completely off him. He looked exactly like a younger version of Noiz, which was surreal it its own; but above all, he was _naked_ , and both Koujaku and Aoba’s jaw dropped as the truth hit him, urging Aoba to quickly covered his naked body with the clothing before he turned to smile bitterly at Koujaku.

“I don’t know what happened but…” he started, interrupted by Koujaku’s sigh as the older man scratched on his head.

“This is just a very bad dream.”

* * *

It was an hour later that Aoba found the said toddler sitting in between his legs, now fully dressed in a rabbit onesie and playing with a milk bottle while Koujaku sat on a nearby couch, giving the pair a suspicious stare with disbelief written all over his own face.

It was fifteen minutes later that Aoba found the said toddler throwing the milk bottle away as he turned in an almost aggressive way to face Aoba. He seemed like he wanted to say something but all he did was sucking on his green-colored pacifier as he, practically, _scowled_ at Aoba.

“Baby seems like he has an opinion about this whole situation,” Koujaku’s voice rang from afar.

“So do you,” Aoba said, instantly responded by Koujaku’s loud sigh.

“I have no idea what is happening but from what I’ve gathered,” he looked around the room, as if trying to find a hint to unveil this mystery. “Seems like brat had gone back time.”

“So you don’t think this is his son anymore?” Aoba shot Koujaku a smirk.

“There’s no way he’ll leave his son alone in a dark house, at 10.00 p.m. at night,” Koujaku defended.

“Hmmm,” Aoba hummed, and Koujaku instantly regretted his choice of words. Aoba knew that he was dissatisfied with Noiz most of the time; and for him to blurt out something that sounded as if he was defending Noiz did nothing but increasing the awkwardness within him.

“Anyway, what do we do with him now?” Koujaku pointed his chin at the toddler, who had now turned to scowl at him instead. Upon noticing that, Koujaku stood up, walked towards the pair and settled beside Aoba as he brought his face close to the visibly annoyed toddler.

“I don’t like him,” he said, his eyes bored deep into the toddler’s. “He looks too much like that bean sprout.”

“He _is_ Noiz,” Aoba corrected. No matter how unbelievable this whole situation was, there was no other explanation as to why Noiz was suddenly nowhere to be seen, and why a toddler that looked exactly like him was found in his very room. The only justification to this could only be that Noiz, for some reason, had shrunk – or like Koujaku said, ‘gone back to time’ – and had become the toddler he was now.

“That explains a lot then,” Koujaku gave out a sarcastic laugh.

He was about to lift himself up when _Noiz_ reached a short hand out, grabbing his bangs and literally pulling on it.

“H-hey!” Koujaku shrieked. He wanted to pull himself off, but Aoba carried _Noiz_ away then, putting a distance between them.

“Don’t hurt him!” he scowled at Koujaku.

“ _He_ hurt me first!” Koujaku retorted.

“Seriously, Koujaku. Are you sure you want to fight with a small child?” Aoba reprimanded. _Noiz_ was glaring at Koujaku when Koujaku returned his gaze at him. He returned his glare with one of his own before he launched forward again, pointing a finger at _Noiz_ ’s face.

“You behave, little brat,” he literally growled the words through his teeth.

The toddler made a small sound then, gradually growing louder when his pacifier fell from his mouth and rolled on the floor.

“Bu! Grr…”

Koujaku was _sure_ that the toddler was growling at him.

“What have you done, Koujaku?” Aoba can’t help but laugh. The scene in front of him reminded him of Koujaku and Noiz’s usual confrontations but it was even more hilarious now that Koujaku was getting fired up by a mere toddler.

“Ask him!” Koujaku scowled at _Noiz_ , who was waving both of his hands at him and attempting to jump out of Aoba’s embrace.

“Calm down,” Aoba said, voice gentle, as he hugged the whole of _Noiz_ ’s body into his arms before he proceeded to cradle him.

_Noiz_ seemed to be obeying him, though. The moment Koujaku was out of sight, he returned his attention to Aoba as Aoba hummed him a soft lullaby. Instead of falling asleep, the toddler merely stared at the man’s profile, his bright green eyes filled with curiosity.

As Aoba rocked him in his arms, he closed his eyes, concentrating on his lullaby when he felt a tiny hand on his face.

“Hm? What is it?”

_Noiz_ had reached up to touch Aoba’s cheek. His gesture wasn’t as aggressive as before anymore; rather, it was gentle, and it reminded Aoba of how Noiz used to touch him whenever they were in close proximity.

“Are you hungry?” Aoba asked, smiling at the toddler before he turned around to look for his milk bottle. But _Noiz_ grabbed on his shirt then, pulling his attention back at him before Aoba heard the toddler making more sounds.

“Ah, bu…”

He couldn’t understand a baby’s language, but this particular baby looked too much like Noiz that Aoba couldn’t help but leaned forward and planted a kiss on his forehead, the fine texture of his blond-colored hair tickled his nose when he did that.

“How did you do that?” Koujaku’s voice rang out of a sudden. The toddler jolted slightly, was about to look around for the source of the voice before Aoba brought his head closer and practically pressing his head against his chest.

“This is called babysitting, Koujaku,” he said, sarcastic.

“Have you babysit before then?” Koujaku asked, amazement obvious in his tone.

“Nope, never,” Aoba responded casually. Koujaku seemed like he wanted to ask more but Aoba started again before he could throw his question out. “Ah, maybe.”

“Really?”

Could this be one of the things Aoba had done when he was back in mainland, Koujaku wondered.

But then, Aoba shot him a mischievous look before he answered,

“I only babysit _one_ person before,” he said, slowly and taking pleasure in seeing the curiosity intensified in Koujaku’s expression. “And that’s him.”

He lifted _Noiz_ up then, shoving him in Koujaku’s direction.

Koujaku didn’t need Aoba to explain himself to understand what Aoba meant. Noiz may be a grown nineteen-year-old, but he was obviously still unknown to a lot of things. Aoba had always been there to guide him when he needed it; and before they knew it, Aoba had become Noiz’s only point of reference whenever he came across anything he wasn’t sure of.

Perhaps that was why this Noiz-lookalike was so attached to Aoba as well.

Giving out another loud sigh, Koujaku retreated to one corner, leaving the two alone as he checked out the items in Noiz’s apartment. He hadn’t been here often and he was even surprised to see that the place was well cleaned and organized.

But the next moment, he felt a pull at the hem of his kimono before he could even move out of the couch he was sitting on, looking down just to see _Noiz_ scowling at him by his leg.

“I’m sorry, he jumped out before I can catch him,” Aoba said from a distance.

Aoba wasn’t sorry at all. Koujaku could see from his face – he was suppressing a laugh, and was totally not pitiful towards how _Noiz_ was roughly pulling on Koujaku’s kimono to the extent that Koujaku was even amazed to know how much strength a toddler his age possessed.

“What do you want?” he grumbled, bending down to carry the angry toddler up.

_Noiz_ glared. Without his pacifier, Koujaku could clearly see a pout forming on his face, his tiny hands grabbing onto Koujaku’s big ones before he made another sound.

“Bu, grr.. ah!”

He couldn’t even understand what _Noiz_ was trying to tell him. All he could do was stared at him, _Noiz_ staring back at him with equal intensity. Then, out of a sudden, _Noiz_ lifted both his small hands up and pressed them on both sides of Koujaku’s face, his small legs kicking in midair when Koujaku pulled him closer out of reflex.

“Bu, bu,” he made more sounds, sounds that Koujaku still couldn’t decipher. His face was closer now, their gaze close, merely inches apart. Then, the next thing happened so fast Koujaku immediately pulled his distance away from the toddler.

“Did he just…” Aoba said, shocked.

Whatever Aoba assumed was right – _Noiz_ had just _licked_ the tip of Koujaku’s nose, completely catching Koujaku off guard. He was still trying to make sense of what happened when _Noiz_ jumped out of his weak clutch and crawled back to Aoba instead, settling himself in between Aoba’s legs before he stretched both of his hands out at Aoba, obviously asking for a hug.

Still amazed, Aoba obliged, carrying _Noiz_ in his arms as he glanced at Koujaku, the urge to laugh too hard to resist.

“What have you done?” he directed the question at _Noiz_ instead, intending to let Koujaku calm down before he could confront him. _Noiz_ ’s answer came in a form of hair-pulling.

“Ouch, what is it?” _Noiz_ continued pulling on his hair, drawing his face closer until Aoba’s nose was near his mouth before he leaned forward, doing exactly the same thing as what he did to Koujaku.

Aoba nearly dropped him.

“Ha! So much for laughing at me,” Koujaku snickered at him from the couch.

“Wh-what?” Aoba retorted with a faint tint of pink on his face. “I-it’s not like it’s anything bad, you know.”

“Oh, really?” Koujaku teased.

Completely avoiding his question, Aoba put the toddler down, mumbling about making food as he left the space, still blushing, leaving both _Noiz_ and Koujaku to continue glaring at each other, Noiz sticking his tongue out at Koujaku almost causing Aoba to run back to them from the kitchen.

* * *

It was almost midnight when Aoba settled _Noiz_ in the innermost side of the bed as he snuggled under the blanket, joining him.

“You fine with sleeping there?” he asked Koujaku, who’d just laid comfortably on the couch.

“Fine, it’s only one night anyway,” Koujaku responded with a yawn. “Sleep, then we’ll go to the hospital tomorrow and settle this once and for all.”

Giving Koujaku a bitter smile, Aoba returned his attention to _Noiz_ , who had his pacifier back in his mouth and was staring at Aoba when Aoba brought him into an embrace and kissed the top of his head.

“Goodnight, Noiz,” he mumbled.

He didn’t check if _Noiz_ had fallen asleep before he fell asleep himself.

* * *

Koujaku was awoken by a loud shriek the next morning. Jumping out of the couch out of reflex, he turned immediately to the source of the scream, almost launching himself at the scene if he hadn’t been holding himself back.

Aoba was in the bed, with Noiz. Koujaku wouldn’t be too shocked if it was the same _Noiz_ he’d remembered from yesterday; but this Noiz was the Noiz he remembered for as long as he knew Noiz and he had to hold on to every ounce of his muscle to stop himself from shouting at them. Noiz was hugging Aoba, yawning softly and still asleep but, like how they’d discovered him in toddler form the previous day, he was… naked, from head to toe.

“Noiz!” Aoba screamed, snapping Koujaku out of his daze. “Wake up!”

Noiz opened his eyes then, slowly, and the moment he saw Aoba, he gave out a yawn before he sank his head deeper into Aoba’s chest, still hugging him.

“When did you come back to normal?” Aoba asked, trying to struggle out of Noiz’s embrace but to no avail.

“Few hours back,” Noiz mumbled sleepily.

“What?”

“When you’re all asleep,” he continued, reading Aoba’s thoughts.

“You mean you know what happened?” Aoba asked.

“I do,” Noiz opened his eyes, now fully awake. “I remember everything.”

Koujaku didn’t even need to see Aoba’s face to know how red it was now.

“Can you just… let me go?” Aoba grumbled. Giving Aoba a quick smirk, Noiz obeyed, releasing Aoba before he sat up and let out another yawn.

There was a lot of explaining he needed to do. But from what Aoba gathered from his consistent persuading, this all happened thanks to a code, a drink, and a wish; the last being something Aoba hadn’t managed to dig out of Noiz before the youngest man dismissed his question with a smirk directed at both of them before he dressed himself up, the last words they heard of him being his intention to investigate further on the matter.

Whatever it was, Koujaku had a bad feeling that history might repeat itself again, especially if Noiz managed to decipher the mystery behind this.

And he was almost sure that the next time this happened, it wouldn’t be Noiz who would experience it again.

But them.

 


	66. Mine; Desire x Reason

He remembered the smell of sea water, the sound of water lapping against shore. But the fondest memory he had was when he felt gentle caresses on his face; he couldn’t see who was touching him but even without the need for visual confirmation, the loving touches affirmed him that those were touches stemmed from genuine concern.

And he wouldn’t want to be touched any other way.

His memory of his childhood was vague; he couldn’t remember a lot of things. Instead, he remembered _him_. It was surreal how he didn’t spend effort to remember what he had done but rather, he spent time to memorize everything _he_ had done – the way he pouted when he teased him, and the way he defended him when he was reprimanded for his countless wrongdoings.

He often felt as if he couldn’t fit into this world, that there was an alternate reason for his existence. And sometimes, he even felt as if he wasn’t necessary after all. Everyone around him had been embracing his all-too-good twin; he felt like a shadow to him, and it wouldn’t make a difference even if he was to disappear right now.

“Why are you still here?”

Aoba walked into the room, scowling at the way _he_ was sprawled across the bed.

“What do you mean?”

“We’re going out, remember?” Aoba crossed his arms, his scowled deepened.

“We are?” He sat up, crossing his legs and giving Aoba a suggestive stare. “Where to?”

Aoba seemed to get the hint because then, he sat beside _him_ , placing his hand on top of _his_ before he intertwined their fingers together.

“To do things only both of us can do together.”

When he turned around to look at Aoba, Aoba’s eyes were closed, seemingly reminiscing on something _he_ didn’t seem to remember.

He didn’t know how Aoba did it but sometimes, he felt as if Aoba understood him better than he understood himself. Often, he’d search his memories, trying to retrace the long-forgotten fragments of his that he never deemed important.

No one cared about him; he was just a shadow to the all-too-good Aoba.

But Aoba cared. And that was all that mattered to him.

 


	67. Tickle Fight; Desire x Reason

The surrealism still buzzed within him even after months of finding a duplication of himself taking its own form. He had been hearing him for most time now, but to be able to _finally_ touch him, see him up close, and talk to him like any other person did still sent him into a whirlpool of confusion. He was still not used to seeing Desire sitting in his room, a frown in between his eyebrows as he squinted at the tiny codes on one of Aoba’s old-time computer; and as he walked towards him and patted him blithely on the head, the other man looked up at him, still scowling before Aoba took a seat beside him.

“You’ll grow wrinkles soon if you scowl too much, you know?” Aoba teased, attempting to make out what Desire was reading before he found the other’s eyes fixed shrilly at him.

“Good then, you’ll be able to see how yourself look like in fifty years.”

Constant interaction with Desire had told Aoba two things: one, he would never admit fault, even though it was way too obvious that he had been too sure of himself; and two, no matter how hard he was to deceive Aoba, there was no way he could conceal the natural curiosity that he would unconsciously wear on his face whenever Aoba posed him a seemingly difficult question.

It was still extremely bizarre to look into his own face, to stare into the same pair of eyes and to feel the touch that was his own and he knew Desire felt the same; the long gaze Desire had always given him being the best answer to his qualms.

He stared at the pout disappeared gradually from his twin’s face, then looking away to focus his attention at the screen instead, pretending to be completely unconcerned towards the stroppy air that was starting to spread between them now.

“Hey,” Aoba called out, amused to see Desire giving a small jerk in surprise. “Are you trying to fix something?”

“I can’t understand these,” Desire said without thinking.

“I thought you know everything about me,” Aoba teased, just to have Desire giving him a glare.

“I don’t know about your knowledge. I know about your feelings, sensations and the memories that hit you the hardest. I don’t know about the details that you learned throughout the years.”

He sounded upset and Aoba could perfectly understand why. It was similar to how he became extremely apprehensive when he knew that a few years of memory was lacking in his brain and even though it wasn’t exactly the same thing as what Desire was experiencing now, he was sure that there’d be a hint of self-doubt anyhow. This wasn’t something they could help anyway.

That said, if Desire was able to remember sensations like how he’d heedfully told Aoba, probably this means…

With that thought in mind, Aoba let out a smirk, inched closer towards Desire, who was still trying to crack the code on the computer screen before he gave him a sudden jab in the ribs.

He almost flipped the whole computer up.

“Oi!” he growled at Aoba, who was trying to suppress his giggle but failing miserably. As a revenge, he stood up, making quick steps towards Aoba and pushing him down, causing both of them to tumble and fall.

“Woah, watch it!” Aoba shrieked, head almost hitting the floor if he’d lost his guard for even one second.

“Re—venge,” Desire purposely dragged his word, a sly smirk on his face as he cracked his knuckles, eyeing Aoba from above him as he hovered over him, practically sitting on Aoba’s stomach.

“H-hey, I was just playing around, okay? I apologize. I’m sorry, so jus—hahahahahaha!!”

Desire clearly had no intention to listen to whatever Aoba had to say. Before Aoba could even finish explaining himself, Desire had reached out to both sides of his ribs, jabbing on them and eventually starting to tickle him. For a long while, Aoba could only struggle with great difficulty, tears in his eyes and completely hopeless and helpless to ease himself out of the situation considering how Desire was putting his weight on him right now.

“Stop! Stop! I beg you! I’m going to die!” Aoba exclaimed, struggling between crying and laughing and it took one whole minute of agony before he found all the overwhelmed sensations left his body. Catching his breath, he took another half a minute to calm himself down before he casted his eyes towards Desire, who was still smirking at him with crossed arms.

“Now _who’s_ the tease, huh?” he mocked, and was about to move away when Aoba pulled him over by the wrist, almost causing him to fall headfirst into Aoba’s face.

“That was one very horrible tease, young man,” Aoba returned his smirk with one of his own. Ruffling Desire’s hair, he gave him a firm tug, ultimately had him in his arms as he patted the back of Desire’s head with the other buried his head against Aoba’s neck.

“But it’s good to see you having fun like this,” Aoba confessed. “Let’s have more fun next time, shall we?”

Desire was quiet, without giving Aoba an answer, but Aoba knew him too well for him to understand that a no-answer was an answer by itself, that it was a soundless acknowledgement; one which Desire was possibly too embarrassed or too awkward to admit.

 


	68. Lies; Desire x Reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written in both first-person pov and third-person pov. Attempting a new writing style c: Timeline of this Drabble is SlyBlue era (at the end). It’s a bit read-in-between-the-lines but I feel that I haven’t been writing enough of Desire to do justice for how much I love him as a character /////

When we were young, you told me that you will always have my back if someone was to threaten me, even though I was the one who had told you in the first place that I’ll never let anyone harm you.

At that time, all you did was smile and said, with voice so soothing and gentle it made me wonder how you managed to stay put at most times.

When we grew older, you told me that you didn’t need me to stand up for you, that you could take care of yourself and that you weren’t a kid anymore.

But, Aoba, who knew you better than I did? When we had been sharing this very body, this very thought, ever since we were born?

I couldn’t remember when had we started to distance away from each other; I never knew what went wrong. Before I knew it, you were turning your back against me, seeing me as a threat, refusing to listen to me. You gained a new friend, a friend that was supposed to be part of us too.

But Aoba, aren’t all of us Aoba too? Why am I the only one being left out?

Aoba, were you tired of me?

I thought if you weren’t adaptive to me then perhaps I could hold myself off; perhaps I could stay quiet, perhaps that would make you feel better.

I didn’t want you to hate me. I didn’t want you to think of me as a nuisance. And I didn’t want you get rid of me.

As long as I could still reside within you, anything was fine with me.

That was all I ever needed.

But… Aoba, you told me you could protect yourself. You told me not to worry about you. You said you had everything under control.

But… you weren’t.

You were out of control.

When I surfaced, taking over your place, I could feel how agonizing you felt; how you felt as if everything had been taken away from you, how you thought of giving up, and how you thought of falling deep into the abyss like nothing - this life - had ever happened before.

But Aoba, you were the one who said you’d protect me, remember?

What happened to the promise?

When I took over your place, all that I had in my mind was to protect you instead. You cannot crumble. I cannot allow you to fall. Regardless of how frustrated or how traumatized you felt, I will protect you. I’ll hold on to this body, this mentality, this emotion, this sanity for you before you picked yourself up and gave me that bright smile you always shot me when you were younger and told me how stupid you felt for falling into your own trap.

It didn’t matter even if I had to hold your composure for you. We are “Aoba” after all. It was my responsibility to take care of “Aoba” and I will use my own way to protect “Aoba”, regardless of what it could be. I didn’t care what was right or wrong; I couldn’t care less about how society worked. All that I ever concerned of was Aoba, nothing else.

***

Desire looked into the mirror, eyes fixed on his reflection, bright golden orbs creating an eerie aura around him. He blinked a few times before the corners of his lips curved into a small smirk.

“You lied,” he muttered.

Lifting a hand to caress the glass piece of the mirror, he touched, tracing the reflection of his face as he slipped his hand downwards, to where his chest was.

“You said you will protect me. So what’s with this solitude you’ve awarded me with, Aoba?”

He knew he didn’t completely mean what he said. But he wasn’t lying either. It didn’t matter even if Aoba was to fall behind; it didn’t matter if he turned out to be the one to stand up for the both of them. Nothing mattered to him. But this very solitude wasn’t what Aoba had promised him.

– We will always be “Aoba”. We will never be complete if we lose any one of us.

…was what he was told.

But right now, as his gaze softened, feeling a small squeeze from beneath his chest, he laughed, light but strong.

“Why do I feel like I’m losing you?”

Sure, he’d surfaced. But there was no meaning to his very existence now if he was the only one taking control.

Aoba wasn’t here.

And by that, he lied.

 


	69. Falling Dreams; Clear x Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If jellyfishes can dream, can rabbits dream too?

_“Master, do you think jellyfishes dream?”_

It was a question Aoba wasn’t able to answer when Clear first proposed the doubt to him. He never knew the answer himself; and he never knew what was the implication behind Clear’s question. Every now and then, he’d find himself considering Clear’s question again, even attempting to find the answer for him. But it was a league he was never in and while he tried to take it as casual as he could, he couldn’t help but feel edgy towards the one unsolvable mystery that had been bugging him for as long as he could remember.

Clear didn’t seem like he minded though; perhaps he had even forgotten about it. While he casually brushed past the topic, Aoba couldn’t help but notice how attached he was towards something that he couldn’t understand.

And _that_ , bugged him greatly.

“Aoba-san!”

He was immediately greeted by an enthusiastic Clear once he stepped into his house. Without having the time to properly settle himself down, he was dragged right into the kitchen, where Tae was standing in front of the oven, looking over something that look like a bunch of white lumps.

“What are you doing here?” Aoba asked, dropping his bag along with Ren in one corner. Only then that he realized Clear was wearing an apron over his casual wear, a look of excitement mixed with anticipation strongly spelt on his face.

“Aoba-san, do you know what day is today?”

Well, the atmosphere in the street had definitely given him a strong clue. But seeing Clear being so enthusiastic in this way intensified his need to tease and, with a playful smile, he shook his head on purpose, already knew what the answer the other would give him.

“It’s a day we see bunnies drop from the sky!”

He heard a loud clanking sound from the oven; Tae had dropped the frying pan she was holding. Aoba stared, mouth wide, at Clear, who was staring so intensely at him he almost felt bad for having to say anything at all from this point onwards.

“H-hey, Clear,” he started at long last. “Who told you about this?”

“Huh? Am I wrong?” Clear dropped his shoulders, visibly disappointed.

“Erm, well, you’re not _exactly_ wrong but–”

“Then we need to prepare to see rabbits dropping tonight!”

“H-hold on a second!” Aoba managed to pull him back before he could jump his way towards the kitchen counter. “Listen, it’s more than that. We do something else besides of… seeing rabbits fall from the sky…”

“Really?” Clear’s eyes glinted with obvious anticipation, a smile spread wide on his face. “What else do we do?”

“We eat sweets,” Aoba explained, his smile felt natural with every passing word he said. “And more importantly, we appreciate the moon.”

“Hmmm,” Clear tilted his head, seemingly considering something before he lifted a big grin again. “Okay then!”

And Aoba wasn’t entirely sure if Clear _really_ understood what he said.

 

A good dinner later, Aoba found himself being hauled up to his own room, then right up to the rooftop again, where he found two cushions already placed neatly on the tiles.

“Aoba-san takes the best spot,” Clear smiled as he escorted Aoba to sit on one of the yellow-colored cushions, one that was nearer to where they could see the moon. Obeying, Aoba settled himself down, then waited until Clear was seated beside him before both of them looked up to the sky, the box of gnocchi they had made themselves earlier located beside them.

“You’re right,” Clear started, breaking the stretched comfortable silence between them. “The moon is really beautiful tonight.”

It amazed Aoba to know that this piece of information hadn’t been registered to Clear yet. He had yet to confirm what type of information did Clear possess in his system. But a year of residing together and more than a year of interacting with each other told him that despite understanding a lot of complicated procedures and systems they could rarely find useful now, Clear also lacked a sense of common knowledge, hence lacking the ability to enjoy the simplest happiness that Aoba found was the most important. It took him a while but when this realization finally hit him in the head, he found himself spending more time with Clear out of his own conscious, often explaining about the simplest yet most common things he could find in between their daily interactions. Whenever Clear’s face lit up with immense excitement, Aoba would often find a spread of warmth across his chest, the squeeze in his heart whenever Clear exclaimed his appreciation again and again only made Aoba want to do _more_ for him.

“Hey, Aoba-san,” Clear called out again, probably feeling awkward for the prolonged silence. “Do you think rabbits would fall from the sky tonight?”

Aoba almost choked on his own saliva.

“C-Clear, listen. Whoever told you that was fooling around with you. No rabbit will fall from the sky tonight.”

“Huh?” Seeing the disappointment in Clear’s face was heart-stabbing, but there was no way Aoba could continue seeing him getting the wrong impression all over again.

“Well, there is a rabbit on the moon, I guess. But it’s not going to fall from the moon,” Aoba quickly rectified, desperately trying to wipe the gloom off Clear’s face.

“So… It’s the same like stars,” Clear said quietly. As he lifted his head to stare at the moon again, Aoba followed suit, patiently waiting for him to continue. “They look like they’re going to fall, but they won’t.”

Aoba didn’t know what else he could say. He didn’t even know where to start clarifying. As he struggled to think of a good conversation opener, Clear spoke again, this time, with a tone that was lighter than before.

“Hey, Aoba-san, do you think rabbit dreams too?”

Well, wasn’t this familiar? As Aoba turned around to look at Clear, he could visibly see the wide smile he was wearing on his face. He couldn’t quite understand why was this question important to him but his intention to give him a good answer was genuine. Closing his eyes, he considered for a bit, then opened his eyes again as he leaned back, laying his back flat against the roof tiles.

“I think they do,” he answered, the corners of his lips curved up as he said. “I think… anything alive would dream. They would live, and store memories. And these memories would eventually become part of their dreams to remind them that they’re still alive, that they’re still living.” Ending his words with a sideway glance at Clear, he realized that Clear had been staring at him all this while, eyes brightened with queries written all over his face.

“Do you dream too, Clear?” Aoba asked instead. It was a genuine curiosity. And across time, he slowly understood why this question was so important to Clear.

“I… do,” Clear answered slowly. “But I never used to dreaming.”  
“That’s good, then,” Aoba let out a cheesy grin. “That means you’re alive and living.”

He wasn’t sure if that answer was good enough for Clear but as Clear joined him to lay on his back, the small smile he witnessed on his boyfriend’s face had told him the answer.

“Say… Who told you about the rabbit dropping thing?” he asked, realizing that they’d broke themselves off the stiff air.

“Hm? Noiz-san. He said that if we stare long enough, rabbits will start falling from the sky.”

.

..

…

He could physically feel one of his nerves at the verge of breaking.

Regardless if Noiz did that intentionally or not, Aoba had made the decision to call him: either asking him to stop playing with others feelings or stop him from gazing at the moon any longer for an unrequited wish.

 


	70. Embrace; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noiz and Aoba’s first winter in Germany brings them a whole new realization of what moving over to Germany actually means to them.

He’d heard about winter stories in Germany even before he departed to Germany himself. Tae in particular was extremely anxious for him, frequently making sure that he knew what he was signing up for as she packed heaps of thick clothing for him to bring along.

He knew how winter would be in Germany. It would be cold, white. He should be fine if he was to prepare himself well.

He thought he would be fine.

Or so he thought.

It started with chilly breeze, continued with profuse layers of snow that had him staring in awe on the first day he stepped out into the snow zone. Knowing that it would be such and actually _seeing_ it with his very own eyes were two different things. It was as if someone came over and painted the city in a layer of salient, thick white over the night when he was soundly asleep, cuddled under his blankets. Tae aside, Noiz had been fixing a pair of tight eyes on him with every passing day they were approaching winter. He’d told Aoba to be careful with keeping himself warm and reminded him countless times to feed himself enough with warm food. It was the only time when Aoba felt as if they’d switched roles. Noiz was worried about him, but as the weather turned colder, his qualms became even more apparent, giving Aoba constant impression as if he’d turned over a new leaf.

But now, as he stared at the hoarded snow on their doorstep, he came to realize exactly _why_ was Noiz so persistent in making sure that he was keeping himself warm.

“…choo!”

He sneezed out of nowhere. He had been standing at the doorway for the most time now, completely unaware of how exposed he was towards the cold weather. No thick coats, no gloves, no earmuffs, no boots; he wore clothes as if it was still summer, ultimately having Noiz to rush up to him from behind and wrap him in a few thick layers of scarf.

“What did I say about keeping yourself warm?” he reprimanded with a pout.

“Ah, sorry,” Aoba apologized bitterly. “Snow.”

“Yeah. Finally.”

Joining Aoba to stare at the snow-filled pavements, Noiz let out a sigh, foggy smoke escaped his lips as he did so.

“C’mon, let’s get you into some warm clothes.”

Aoba did as he was told. This was the first time for him to experience snow and all he could do was allow Noiz to take over the caretaker position as he prepared him for the weather.

He was used to wearing thick materials on his body, but the way Noiz had wrapped him in layers after layers almost suffocated him: thick trench coat over his thick inner shirt, with thick pair of gloves and an earmuff completing the set. He felt like a burrito.

“Should be fine now,” Noiz nodded approvingly.

“It’s hard to move,” Aoba pouted.

“It’s for your own good. You don’t want to catch a cold.”

Without waiting for an answer, Noiz headed back into the room, seemingly about to prepare himself while Aoba pressed his hands against the window, his hot breath blurring the glass piece in front of him. The sight was marvellous. Everything was covered in white; it was as if they’d just entered a whole new dimension. He wiped the mist clean, the tip of his nose pressing against the cold glass material before he felt a pair of hands wrapping him into a hug from behind.

“Ready to head out?”

He looked over his shoulder. Noiz was leaning his head against his shoulder, a beanie on his head. He, too, was wearing a pair of thick gloves, thick trench coat enveloping the most of his body as he gave Aoba a heated stare.

“Let’s!” Aoba grinned lustrously.

He’d never expected winter to be as such. It was cold, unquestionably. But it was beautiful, to the extent that it felt magical. His steps sunk into the snow-coated floor, feeling his boots damped underneath. Hand-in-hand, they walked down the pavement, keeping each other close all the while.

“There’s not many people on the street,” Aoba said, gaze gliding from one side to another side of the road they were walking on.

“Must be thanks to the weather,” Noiz replied briefly. “People who probably prefer to stay at home during days like these.”

“Hm? Then why are we out today?” Aoba thought out loud.

“Thought you would like to see how winter feels like here,” Noiz lifted a small smile. Despite how overly concerned he was towards how Aoba was coping with the change of temperature, he seemed to be very fervent in showing how his world was like when it approached winter. And he was right about that. Aoba wouldn’t want to be stuck behind glass windows while snow fell. If this couldn’t be his first time, he wasn’t sure when he would finally be able to experience winter for himself.

“Let’s find a place to sit,” Noiz suggested, while Aoba nodded in response.

The park they were used to visit was now blanketed in a layer of white. It was almost unrecognizable. They found a bench under one of the tree and while Noiz rushed off to buy them warm drinks, Aoba sat on the bench, hands on his knees as he continued gazing around, suddenly feeling extremely interested in every single item that invaded his line of sight.

“Here.”

He only looked up when Noiz called out to him, passing him a cup of what seemed like hot chocolate.

“Thanks,” Aoba grinned. The drink felt warm on his tongue, heating his insides up as he wrapped his palms around the paper cup, an equally warm smile gracing his features.

“You seem really happy,” Noiz commented.

“It’s the first time I’m experiencing winter in Germany after all. It’s pretty refreshing,” Aoba explained.

“How do you like it?” Noiz asked, sipping soundlessly on his drink.

“Not my best preference, but it’s still nice to spend quiet time like this. With you,” he ended with a delighted smile towards Noiz.

Noiz’s cup halted before it could reach his lips. Smiling, he wrapped Aoba’s hand with his own, shifting closer towards him then leaning his head on top of Aoba’s head.

“This is the first time I’m experiencing winter with someone I like as well.”

“Ah…” Aoba let out a weird noise, noticing what Noiz was implying. Heat pooled on his cheek as he raised his cup, pretending to be drinking to conceal his flutters.

“I thought it was dull,” Noiz continued. “I couldn’t feel how ‘cold’ winter was, but even after I regained my sensations now, I don’t think I can still feel it properly.”

“How is that so?” Now, _that_ concerned Aoba. Quickly turning to look at Noiz, he threw him a wary gaze.

“Don’t worry,” Noiz chuckled. “It’s just that I have you by my side now. So regardless of what season it is, it’d still be warm.”

“O-oh…”

Aoba didn’t know what else he should say. Noiz could be extremely upfront at times and it _always_ caught him off guard. Averting his gaze, he fixed his attention at a far distance ahead instead, catching sight of the tall building he remembered as a restaurant they used to dine in together when he first arrived in Germany.

“…choo!”

“Are you okay?”

Aoba sniffed. This is bad, he might have _really_ caught a cold.

“Let’s go back,” Noiz urged, about to stand up when Aoba pulled him back down again.

“Wait, let’s stay here for a bit more.”

“You’re catching a cold,” Noiz said, voice slightly distressed.

“It’s fine, you’ll look after me, right?” Aoba grinned. “I want to watch this for a bit more.”

And all Noiz could do is sit back, pulling Aoba closer by the waist before he planted a kiss on the other’s forehead.

“I’ll look after you, regardless if you’re sick or not,” he said, eliciting a chortle out of Aoba.

Perhaps it was nice to be able to experience the first time he was to fall sick in Germany as well, Aoba thought.

But he was sure that Noiz would glare at him if he ever spoke that very thought out.

Simply leaning his weight against Noiz, he let out a relieved sigh, thinking about how grateful he was to have make the decision to travel over to Germany with Noiz. Because then, they wouldn’t be able to sit together like this, appreciating a winter scenery that they would never have the chance to witness in Midorijima.


	71. Equal Steps; Ren/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being human was tough; being human for Aoba was tougher. But all Aoba asked for was…

One year wasn’t too long, wasn’t too short either for both Ren and Aoba. It’d been a surreal journey of self-discovery and mutual support that’d been the biggest reassurance for them but despite the very uncanny situation they’d landed themselves in, the prime support they found themselves clinging onto was how people around them were reacting to them – one that was perhaps the most important yet most essential assurance that they’d need.

Compared to when he was first discharged from the hospital, Ren had obviously learned how to lead himself better; he’d learned how to walk around the town without feeling too much of self-conscious eating him up from the inside (although AllMate Ren was still a prevalent support for him when it came to lone strolls) and he’d equipped speaking skills that helped him communicate with people without evoking too much of complications.

Aoba was his main pillar of support and would always be. But his biggest concern remained to when _he_ could be as reliable of a person for Aoba to depend on as well.

Aoba had told him to take his own pace, that there was no need to rush. But having Aoba to bear all the burden while he waited for him to suit himself into being human wasn’t his intention as well. Despite how inconvenient it was for him to walk on two legs, to possess hands big enough to bring Aoba into his arms, he’d almost hoped for courage and strength huge enough for him to be Aoba’s shield when he needed him.

“You’re just like how I remember you to be; you never changed.”

There was always this intricate sense of emotions within him when Aoba said that. Aoba seemed perfectly fine, happy even, to see Ren being who he always was; but for Ren, it sounded almost as if he’d never grown out of his AllMate shell and into the _human_ he wanted to become. He knew Aoba didn’t mean it that way, and he definitely knew that Aoba had always preferred it that way – but if there was _any way_ that could purge his growth into one where he could hear Aoba blurting the “I can totally depend on you” mantra at him, then he’d feel that this blessing of a body wasn’t a wasted gift.

When he told Koujaku about his concerns, though, all Koujaku did was giving him a brash laugh that had him staring in confusion, instantly feeling as if he’d just said something awkward.

“Take your time,” Koujaku’s words were a repetition of Aoba’s. “It takes time for a normal person to start over, what more for a person who never knew how owning a body feels like.”

And for all the while he attempted to indulge in these comforting words, he found himself becoming all the more anxious – that feeling of being able to do a better job when he was an AllMate over possessing a body of his own overwhelming him every so often.

“Ah, Ren! I didn’t know you’re coming.”

The moment he saw Aoba emerging from Heibon, he stood up from the bench he was sitting outside of the shop, hauling his packets of shopping bags up and waited as Aoba strode hurriedly towards him.

“Grocery for Granny?” Aoba teased, eyeing suggestively at the bags.

“Yeah. Tae-san required for a favour.”

“Well, that explains why you’re here now. How long have you been waiting?”

“Not long. About two hours and five minutes.”

“…you could’ve returned first, you know…”

“It’s fine.”

He couldn’t quite understand why Aoba was wearing this bitter-looking smile on his face, and he wondered why it wasn’t ‘right’ to wait for Aoba for such long hours.

“Do you need help with that?” Aoba asked, slinging his bag firmly over his shoulder, a finger pointing at the bags.

“It’s fine, I can handle this.”

“I see.”

He shouldn’t be troubling Aoba with petty matters like this; he’d been troubling Aoba for the entire time now. But for some reason, Aoba didn’t seem too happy with his rejection, having him to wonder if he’d said something wrong for long minutes before he came to a halt when Aoba’s eyes brightened out of the blue, pointing at something in a distance.

“Look, Ren!” Aoba said. “That’s the cat-type AllMate we’ve been talking about.”

Ah, he remembered that. It was a big hit when this AllMate type was released into the market and he remembered Aoba mentioning things like wanting to find him a mate, jokingly.

Now that the memory returned to him, it dawned upon him of how much time had passed ever since he walked in a level that wasn’t Aoba, when Aoba’s bag was where he resided and when his only responsibility was to support Aoba – his master – regardless of what cost it’d take him.

Aoba had run towards the AllMate while he stood, patting it on the head before he waved at Ren, gesturing him over.

“It’s so tiny,” Aoba commented, tickling it under the chin. “I thought it’d be bigger, at least something like Ren, well, the _other_ Ren.”

AllMate Ren barked happily at the comment, his tail wagging ferociously.

“Does Aoba want an AllMate?” Ren asked, words spilled out of his mouth before he could stop them.

“Huh? Nah, I already have Ren, and you,” Aoba said, carrying the cat into his arms as the other cuddled comfortably in it.

Ren understood his point; but truth was, he also understood how _both_ Rens weren’t in the best position to be Aoba’s AllMate. The blue-furred dog was none other but one of Aoba’s pet and Ren… he wasn’t able to conduct surrounding analysis or even to accumulate statistics like he was once able to when he was an AllMate. Instead, he needed to learn everything from scratch – on how to be human and even how to take care of himself, let alone taking care of Aoba.

“Perhaps it’s about time Aoba finds an AllMate,” he said, totally insentiently.

“What?” Aoba looked up from where he was brushing the cat’s fur, an expression of confusion.

“Aoba could be slow at times, careless most of the times. It’s a bit worrying.”

“Oi, Ren—“

“And Aoba would need help to go around places too.”

“Ren—“

“Perhaps Aoba could—“

Out of a sudden, the cat jumped out of Aoba’s hands, leaping right towards Ren’s face and scratching him on the nose before it throttled onto the floor, walking away like it was the most natural thing to do.

“Ren! Are you okay?!”

It took Ren a few moments to return from the abrupt shock, only coming back to himself when Aoba was standing right in front of him, their faces merely inches apart.

“You’re bleeding! Come down, let me check your wound.”

He did as he was told, bending to the same eye level as Aoba and immediately felt Aoba’s fingers on his nose.

Ah, it hurt, just a bit.

“Ouch, it looks painful…” Aoba trailed off, a thin scowl in between his eyebrows as he wiped the small trail of red liquid off Ren’s nose.

“Aoba…” Ren called out, completely on instinct.

“Does it hurt?” Aoba asked again, then, he laughed out of the blue, ruffling Ren on the hair instead. “Jealous over a cat, I can’t believe you.”

Was that jealousy?

Over a cat?

He wasn’t used to this emotion Aoba had been frequently using on him now. He didn’t know how jealousy felt like, although Beni liked to define it as being ‘possessive’. All he knew was that he was caught in this contradicting emotions of not wanting to be replaced yet not wanting Aoba to be troubled more than he already did. And while he talked about it, Aoba would always laugh at him, then comforting him and telling him that he was fine, and that _he_ himself was fine too; that this emotion was nothing to be overly concerned about.

Being human was hard; being human for _Aoba_ was even tougher, for all the right reasons.

“Come here, you.” He’d let his thoughts drift while he stared at Aoba’s apprehensive face. But then, Aoba pulled him over, rubbing their noses together, kissing him on the nose where he was hurt before he pressed their foreheads together.

“You’re fine the way you are, okay? And I need no other AllMate but you. You’ve been the greatest support I can ever obtain. Always.”

He needed time to understand how bearing emotions felt like, or even how being human felt like. But perhaps, he was starting to understand what Aoba _really_ needed now – slowly but surely.

What Aoba needed wasn’t a tool to help him navigate his way around the place, not a tool to help him collect data or analyse statistics. But what he needed was a partner, one that he could hug and be hugged, one that he could kiss and be kissed and one that could walk the rest of his life with him, with a pair of hands and a heart that pounded passionately beneath that wide chest.

And that was even more important to Aoba than owning an AllMate, being one that he could trust and rely on completely. And one that was _Ren_.


	72. Try Me?; Mizuki/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He thought he’d understand how the other Aoba works and he’s fine with it. Of course he is. What he’s not fine with is, however…

_Accident_.

It was a term that Mizuki had never foreseen to be changing his entire mind-set. An accident was nothing unusual to him, that was so for a life as a Rib team leader; the biggest Rib team, nevertheless. He was fine with physical confrontations, having endured it for the rest of his life. And he was fine with being mentally challenged as well, being the only person who’d tolerated Scrap for the umpteenth time. Accident or not, he was sure that he would be able to deal with it as long as his rationale held.

But he wasn’t fine with the ambiguity _he_ left him – one that kept him awake in late hours at night, and one that had his heart skip a beat whenever he was to come into close contact with Aoba; for reasons unknown.

Ever since the Platinum Jail incident, they’d returned to their usual lifestyle; Mizuki rebuilding Dry Juice, Aoba with his job at Heibon. Nothing seemed to be particularly out of place, nothing was too awkward between them.

Well, except for the fact that Mizuki found himself constantly sitting on the edge of his seat just to be prepared for any possible impact by _him_ , who seemed to have efficiently mastered the technique to jump out snappishly and catching Mizuki off guard, then laughing into his face.

It was particularly inconvenient at first, what with the slow response and then the consequence that came after. But across time, Mizuki started to notice a pattern in this form of ‘ambush’ that had him treating the matter with the most off-the-cuff way he could. Whenever _he_ was to reappear, Mizuki would bring himself to sit with him, talk to him, and even when he was to receive a full round of punches on his body, he was sure to catch that hint of fleeting fluster on the other’s face before he could hide it from him.

Spending more time with the other Aoba reminded Mizuki of when he first met him – in the dark alley, where he found him sulking with wounds all over him and with a face that cared nothing of the world. He thought that they were alike, and he was pretty much right. Even after Aoba changed and become a calmer person that trapped Mizuki in a turbulence of incredulity, he still found that core trait of his unchangeable and still, that was something that he adored greatly, in turn having his initial impression towards Aoba unshaken.

He wondered how exasperating Aoba would feel having to carry two conscious within him, and he pondered on ways he could do to help him. So even when the other Aoba appeared out of nowhere, pulling him over and brushing his lips against his and telling him that it was yet another accident, he’d smile at him, return that peck and stare as deep flush of red appeared on Aoba’s face.

He thought he was having a good grip of how to handle Aoba by now, and he thought perhaps Aoba was opening up to him again. Maybe this time, he could make Aoba feel belonged; like part of a family.

And maybe this time, he would eventually make Aoba to open up more, telling him when he was hurt, reprimanding him when he was the reason he was hurt – as long as he didn’t keep things within himself.

“Hey.”

Aoba was in Black Needle again one late night, sitting in his usual seat near the bar counter with a sulking face that told Mizuki enough of who he was dealing with.

“Cocktail?” Mizuki offered, waving the glass in front of his face.

“You want me drunk, aren’t you?” Aoba lifted a suggestive smirk, then going back to stare into nothing with his hand supporting his face.

“If you get drunk, I’ll carry you home,” Mizuki smiled bitterly. It wasn’t his first time hauling a drunk Aoba home anyway; well, the other Aoba, specifically.

“Home?” Aoba seemed to gain interest in the particular suggestion. “ _Your_ home?”

Mizuki coughed loudly.

“ _Your_ home,” he said, voice firm. “Be careful of that body. Aoba’s been working a lot lately.”

“It’s my body,” Aoba pouted. “I know what to do with it.”

“Nothing extreme, okay?”

“Extreme?” Aoba quirked a curious eyebrow.

“Like getting yourself hurt or something.”

“Oh, _that_ extreme. I thought you meant something else.”

It wasn’t hard to capture Aoba’s wavelength, especially _this_ Aoba. He was always at the top of his game, thinking of things that was way too far a league for Mizuki to reach. But yet, that was the rawest part of Aoba Mizuki had the fortune to encounter, and for some reason, _he_ was the only person that this very part of Aoba had surfaced to interact with.

“It’s late, by the way,” Mizuki said, taking the glass of liquor off Aoba’s hand. “Tae-san would worry.”

“Hmph.” With just a low hum, Aoba stood up, was about to walk away when he turned around again, catching Mizuki in surprise.

Ah, this was it, Mizuki thought, bracing himself for the impact. Then, sure enough, Aoba leaned towards him in the next minute, the tips of their noses practically touching as Mizuki closed his eyes, waiting for the touch.

But it never came.

“Heh, I see you’re getting used to this.”

When he opened his eyes, Aoba’s gaze was locked on his, a smirk curved at the corners of his lips, his hands pressing on Mizuki’s thighs.

“ _He_ would be proud of you,” Aoba ended with a few rough pats on Mizuki’s shoulders and, without another word, he turned his back towards him, leaving Mizuki gaping in stupor before he let out a few fake coughs, the incident just a few minutes ago returning to him.

He thought he was used to it; to how this Aoba could be so very upfront and very shameless with everything he was to do. He wasn’t that hard to understand, and Mizuki was perfectly fine with it.

What he wasn’t fine of, was how he was so good with dangling his thoughts in mid-air, with all the suggestive actions he was an expert in.

And he wondered when he would finally understand him inside-out, and how much time he had left.


	73. Swift Motion; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He never understood how his haircutting business is so important to him - until he tries it out for himself.

He didn’t visit the place where Koujaku worked very regularly. He knew how he steered his business anyway, so there wasn’t a point for him to drop by. Even if he was to, he’d find himself being glared at, having step into a territory that was a contrast to who he was. When they started dating, though, he would find himself walking insentiently to where Koujaku was rumoured to be stationed, merely peeking from behind the wall and whenever Koujaku was to notice him, he’d stop everything he was doing, ignoring the long line of waiting customers as he trudged his way towards where Noiz was acting as if he didn’t care a bit of what was happening, then stood right in front of him, arms crossed with a dainty smile stretched across his face.

“No Rhyme business today?” he’d always ask, in which Noiz would simply shrug and look away. He didn’t need to make too much effort to find out what Koujaku was up to as well, neither did he need to spend too much energy searching on Koujaku’s background. Nothing about Koujaku was pleasant, he was quick to realize. And nothing about Koujaku was transparent as well, which exasperated him - a contrasting existence with Koujaku - at the same time.

He wasn’t one who’d force words out of Koujaku unless the time called for it. Yet, he knew that it’d take forever for Koujaku to spill his beans and hence, he’d find himself intuitively eyeing Koujaku from afar whenever he found the chance, just so he could capture a hint of when Koujaku would be vulnerable enough to let himself loose.

Ever since they started going out, though, Koujaku had also established this rule of helping Noiz with his haircut. He’d noticed how the older man fiddle with his hair whenever he was to wake up just slightly later than him. At first, it was a real nuisance. He’d never allowed anyone to touch him if it wasn’t for the sake of mutual benefits. He’d pushed Koujaku away with a frown, having Koujaku to laugh bitterly at his bedhead before he strapped the matter to the back of his mind. But with every increased times of Koujaku doing the same thing every morning before he woke up, he simply let him be, closing his eyes and feeling the gentle touch of Koujaku’s fingers against his short strands.

Then, it was a few months later that Koujaku cracked the question at him, annoying him at first, convincing him later.

He could never understand why hair-cutting was such an important business for Koujaku. They were just… hair, merely part of one’s appearance. No one should be so concerned of someone’s hair, especially one that wasn’t theirs. Perhaps it was a habit from work, perhaps it was how Koujaku had been telling Noiz that he’d been wanting to cut Aoba’s hair for the longest time ever, or perhaps, it was that Noiz had become part of Koujaku’s priority list that had prompted that concern.

Noiz never knew. But he wanted to. And he could only think of one way to find out.

When he threw the question at Koujaku, all Koujaku did was gape at him, then ruffled him on the hair before he scowled and averted the other’s eyes. What was wrong with wanting to try out hair cutting for himself? Or was Koujaku underestimating him? Or did he not want anyone to touch his own hair?

“Well, if you want,” Koujaku grinned after finally managing to control his laughter. “But take it slow, I don’t want to come out bald. It hurts my reputation.”

He was _definitely_ underestimating him. With the raw intention to prove him wrong, Noiz started researching on various techniques for hair-cutting, even trying to choose a new hairstyle for Koujaku before he decided that _he_ wouldn’t be able to endure a new sight even before he’d gotten used to the old one.

So, on the day when both of them weren’t occupied with their own business, Koujaku found himself sitting in front of the mirror, white cloth draped around his torso with Noiz standing behind him, fiddling with a scissors.

“H-hey,” Koujaku voiced out, breaking the silence in the room.

“What?” Noiz responded, eyes still locked onto the piece of metal material.

“You sure you know what you’re doing?”

Noiz clicked his tongue. He was confident with his own skills, even though this was technically his first time cutting a person’s hair. He’d know how fast of a learner he was and above all, it was _Koujaku_ ’s hair that he was cutting. There was no way he would flop this.

“You don’t trust me?” he asked instead, small smirk lifting from the corner of his lips, gaze now fixed on Koujaku’s chary one in the mirror.

“It’s not that but…” Koujaku swallowed down his throat. “Just so you know, this is the first time I’m allowing someone to touch my hair. Just… treat it with care.”

So he was Koujaku’s first time? It did things to him. Feeling all the more determined, he crouched, just enough to nuzzle his face against Koujaku’s then kissing him softly on the cheek.

“Leave it to me.”

And so it began. While Noiz cut and trimmed Koujaku’s hair, he’d noticed how penetrating Koujaku’s attention was at every one of his movement.

Dark locks lay on Koujaku’s once clean floor, cool breeze blew into the room, giving a sort of ticklish sensation on Koujaku’s naked neck where Noiz had clipped up for better vision. For a long time, the only sound in the room was the snipping sound of Noiz cutting Koujaku’s hair; and for a longer time, all Koujaku could hear was his own strident heartbeat in his ears. He couldn’t see a lot of what Noiz was doing, especially when Noiz was working on his hair behind his head. But like he said, he wanted to trust Noiz and he was sure that his perception of Noiz being an intelligent man of his own wasn’t a mere deception.

At long last, Noiz stopped his motion, straightening himself up while he gave an attentive good look at Koujaku’s hair.

“Is everything okay?” Koujaku asked out of unease.

“Hm,” Noiz hummed, which did nothing but intensify Koujaku’s edginess. “Just a bit.”

Something _must_ have happened – that was Koujaku’s first impression. But all Noiz did was inching his face close to one side of Koujaku’s hair, lifting his bangs up where the tattoo on his face was obvious before he brought the strands of hair towards his lips, brushing them against the silky strands then moving his lips to Koujaku’s face, kissing him on the black swirls of pattern instead.

“O-oi—“

“I kind of understand why hair-cutting is important to you now,” Noiz was practically whispering into Koujaku’s ear. “It’s so quiet you can take your time to think about unnecessary things, isn’t it?”

He didn’t know if he had answered it correctly but the next thing he knew, Koujaku had spun around his chair, coming face-to-face with Noiz then pulling him over by the waist, until his face was pressed against Noiz’s abdomen.

“Isn’t that the same with you?” Koujaku muttered. “Isn’t that why you’re always quiet when you’re with me?”

Did he, though? Noiz wondered. Perhaps he did, but he never knew a lot about himself anyway. If Koujaku said so, then it must be an observation too palpable to miss for him.

“We’re not that different, after all,” Noiz responded, finger tracing the side of Koujaku’s face, where his tattoo was. “We’re both bottles bottling up our problems simply because we understand each other too well.”

He never recognized this until now. He wouldn’t say that he’d done a perfect haircut for Koujaku, but at the very least, he’d gotten an answer for himself.

Perhaps that was also why Koujaku wanted to cut Noiz’s hair too – just so he could give them the comfortable silence they needed, when they weren’t too occupied with the consideration towards other people and when they weren’t fucking the daylights out of the other person.


	74. An Apology; Koujaku/Noiz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies were never easy; especially for them.

It was nothing too serious; in fact, it was only a tiny, insignificant friction of a misunderstanding Noiz was too hesitant to rectify. He knew Koujaku’s temperament too well to know where the argument was heading to. Without the urge to even defend himself, he’d stood up, conveniently ignoring every question, every word Koujaku was shouting into his ears as he paced his way towards the door, no longer had the intention to entertain him any longer. Considering how hot-headed Koujaku was, and how he was so sure of his accusation towards Noiz, the Rhyme player knew that it was a waste of energy to debate with him any longer anyway, let alone trying to convince him into believing what he had to say for himself.

Prevention was the best solution now; or so he thought.

He left the Rib player’s place in a hurry, turning a deaf ear towards whatever he had to say, leaving Koujaku’s doubts and fury unattended. He walked out of the quiet area where Koujaku’s house was located, into the busy central of Midorijima before he found himself getting irritated with the buzz that was the start of the town’s nightlife. He wasn’t particularly interested with what the night activities could offer him. Instead, it’d be awesome if he could land himself a Rhyme match now as a distracting mechanism.

A quick ask at Usagimodoki was all he needed to find himself in an alley. He didn’t foresee any strong opponent anyway; but a Rhyme match would definitely be helpful to help him pass time. 

And soon enough, a Rhyme field was pulled up, one that was obviously triggered by a drive-by. He waited; waiting to analyze the his opponent at the other side. And when he finally did, he let out a smirk - well, this was not going to go as how he expected after all.

***

He knew he’d done a wrong step; he knew he was the one who’d driven Noiz away. That was why he stopped himself from chasing after him when the door was slammed shut in his face. He sat on the bed, clutching his head, wondering what exactly went wrong that had him going over the board like that. Noiz leaving was perhaps the best solution for both of them at the moment and he hated himself for unable to let himself loose especially at times like these; he disliked this part of himself for having a brat, who was technically way younger than him to tell him what was the best thing to do for the both of them now. He’d lost enough of his pride; if ever, this was perhaps the best time for him to repent his faults.  

With that resolution in mind, he stood up, hastily grabbed his sword from a corner of the room and headed out.

He had an idea where Noiz might head to. The possibility of him heading home was low; because technically Noiz himself wouldn’t even call it a home, let alone a shelter when he was wounded. He headed into the busiest place he could locate in town. The nightlife had just started and the streets were crowded it made moving around hard for him. He clicked his tongue at the mess people were creating themselves, visibly dissatisfied with the way the residents on this island were still looking out for an alternative relief for a mere illusion that was created by Toue. He heard thunderstorms echoing from afar and scowling deeper, he continued looking around, trying to spot for a hint of green before he found his feet bringing him to an alley. It was all messed up; the scattered rubbish bins and the scratches on the walls had told Koujaku enough that a fight - or Rhyme - had occurred here just not long ago. He walked into the alley. It was way too quiet than where he came in from. 

And then, he spotted it, that hint of green he was so desperately looking for: leaning against the wall, staring into nothing, blood dripping from his fingertips as he supported his hands on his knees. 

“Noi–” He hadn’t even finished his words before a sudden downpour drown upon them - gradually, then heavily. Noiz had turned to look at him then, his expression blank as if he’d just recovered from a shock. 

Koujaku rushed towards him; if he hadn’t looked wounded when he left his house, he definitely looked scarred now with deep bruise on his right face and blood dripping from his head, creating a trail of red along his cheek.

“Did you run into a fight?” Koujaku’s first question was asked out of concern, but it was perfectly that that had Noiz smirked in disgust. He looked away, no longer had the energy to look Koujaku in the eyes. They were too intense for him to take and all he ever wanted now was a good rest and probably he could finally fall asleep and let the wounds heal by himself.

But of course, with Koujaku right here, right in front of him, catching him right when he was in a mess; there was no way he could ‘sleep’ right there and then.

Koujaku looked as if he was about to scream at him - he was all prepared for it - but instead, he pulled him over, pressing his head against his chest as he patted his head. The rain continued pouring, drenching them wet from head to toe. It was a perfect reflection of Noiz’s mood - one that was cold, horrid, and lonely. 

“I’m sorry,” Koujaku muttered. The storms were loud, the rain was loud; but Koujaku’s word was louder, rolling straight into his heart. “I’m sorry for letting this happen.”

Koujaku didn’t need to apologize. If ever, it was _his_  own fault for drawing troubles to himself. He remembered Koujaku telling him countless times to look after his own back, to _think_  before he acted but at the peek of his fury, he seemed to decide that taking care of his own rage was a solution far better than taking in Koujaku’s advice.

As a consequence, here he was - worrying Koujaku and hurting himself at the same time.

He struggled out of Koujaku’s arms, looking up to see Koujaku giving him the same intense stare he’d been giving him for a while now. And, without warning, he lurched forward, catching Koujaku in a sudden, passionate kiss that almost had Koujaku lose his balance and tumble backwards if he hadn’t been grabbing onto Noiz. 

He didn’t know where this came from; for all he knew, apologies were never easy for them, especially when it came to verbal apologies. 

But their physical actions always did the work. They always do.


	75. Hand-In-Hand; Koujaku/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s unfair how Koujaku could say things like ‘it’s just like how I remember it to be’ but when Aoba tries it, it finds everything he says to appear way too contradicting than he wanted it to be.

There would always be this indescribable feeling within him whenever he was to come into close contact with Koujaku. He knew that Koujaku had been someone older than him; precisely, someone he could depend on if time called for it. But oftentimes, he’d find himself looking at Koujaku’s back from a far distance and noticed how out-of-reach his childhood friend was. He’d come to know everything about Koujaku, sure. And he’d definitely come to know about what pushing a man to his limit would do to him. He wanted to take things slow with Koujaku. It’d been such a long time since Koujaku believed that spelling things out to him wasn’t anything bad after all. And he was definitely not in the position to question how much Koujaku was able to take until he fell apart. Completely.

…which wasn’t something he wanted to see at any rate.

Hence, keeping a distance didn’t seem like it was the most logical thing to do but it was definitely what both of them needed, especially when one of them needed time for themselves to sort things out in their head. Aoba knew that very well; so if Koujaku needed time, he’d give him all the time in the world.

He simply needed to believe that Koujaku wouldn’t keep things away from him for too long.

“Alright, this is the last one for today!”

“But, Koujaku-san…”

“I’ll be around again tomorrow.”

Koujaku grinned lustrously at the last of his customers before he packed his things up, turning his back towards them just to come face-to-face with Aoba, who was leaning against a nearby pillar, Ren tucked in his bag and one hand carrying what seemed to be a packet of food.

“Yo, Aoba!” Koujaku greeted, the curves on the corners of his lips lifted ever so slightly. “Done with work?”

“Uhuh,” Aoba said, swallowing the last piece of his food down his throat. “You look like you’re done for the day too.”

“Yup,” Koujaku said, pacing faster towards where Aoba was standing. “Are you waiting for me?”

Aoba scowled, a faint blush visible on his cheeks. “Do you even need to ask?”

“Ah… well, I just thought I should clarify. You see, maybe you’re just passing by, maybe I’m just thinking too much, maybe—“

“Argh, I know, I know! Yes, I’m waiting for you, you don’t need to embarrass me like that!”

His pout was something that never failed to put a smile on Koujaku’s face. Witnessing red scotching up to the tips of his ears, Koujaku moved closer, crouching down just enough to catch Aoba’s reddened face.

“What?” Aoba asked, still with an evident scowl in between his eyebrows.

“Can we hold hands when we walk back together?”

“You—“

He knew the answer; of course he did. But it was still heart-warming if Aoba was to spell it out himself. Expecting a smack on the head, he waited for the impact, just to see Aoba lowering his head, then reaching out a timorous hand to grip Koujaku on his hand.

“Let’s go home,” he mumbled, three words that effectively crushed every ounce of willpower within Koujaku.

Koujaku’s hand felt huge in his. He remembered holding this very hand when they walked back to their houses, just like this, when they were small. Koujaku’s hand back then was already warm, big, but definitely less coarse than how it felt in Aoba’s hand now. Was it because of the fact that they’d grown that had made him feel as if age has taken away the innocence even on their skin as well? Was it because of the fact that they had been going through so much that this very pair of hands had sustained injuries and burdens, intended and unintended, that many of which Aoba had never known of? How much of Koujaku that he had yet to know? And how much more he could be of help to Koujaku?

He rubbed his thumb against the back of Koujaku’s hand out of instinct, the roughness of his skin all the more palpable against his own skin. He could almost feel the faded scars; wounds that he probably would never knew how they made it there on Koujaku’s once-perfect skin texture.

And that mere realization stung him.

“Hey, Aoba.” Koujaku’s voice almost made him jump. “Your hand still feels as small as I remember it to be.”

Intuitively, Aoba raised a hand, was about to give Koujaku a good punch against his arm when he stopped, gripping harder on the other’s hand instead, looked away and started,

“Well, your hand is barely recognizable for me, though.”

“Hm?”

“Coarse, full of scars…” Aoba said mindlessly. “Stories behind them that I would never know.”

“Ah.”

As if realizing what Aoba was implying, Koujaku scratched the back of his head, a bitter smile graced his features.

“I’ll tell you one day, if you want to know,” he smiled, his answer urging Aoba to turn around and look at him.

“You would tell me?” Aoba’s eyes brightened.

“Of course,” Koujaku grinned. “I didn’t think you would be interested in this kind of things, though. It’s not… a very pleasant story.”

Aoba halted his steps, tugging on Koujaku’s hand just enough for him to meet him in the eyes.

“Do you think I’d think of such a scar to be pleasant?” he asked, lifting Koujaku’s hand and swinging it right in front of his eyes. Then, with his free hand, he brushed a fingertip against the faded wounds on the back of Koujaku’s hand, tracing a ghostly line towards the ones on his knuckles. “Not only the ones here – the ones on your chest, on your back, on whichever part of your skin – do you know how shocked I was when I first saw them? I can only imagine how painful it was when you got them and I’m… I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for you when it happened but at the very least, can you let me play a part now? I can treat it. I mean, I can treat all your wounds in the futu—wait, no, please don’t get more wounds in the future, but if you ever, I’ll treat all of—wait.”

Koujaku started laughing then. Slinging one hand around Aoba’s torso, he pulled his boyfriend close, kissing him on the forehead then elating a tender smile at him.

“You don’t even need to try too hard to treat my wounds, Aoba,” he said, arm encircling Aoba’s waist. “Do you ever consider why I’m able to return after what happened back in mainland?”

Aoba knew the whole story, of course he did. There were pasts that he could no longer change; incidences that had caused permanent marks on Koujaku. His fingers still caressing Koujaku’s hand, he raised it up, unhurriedly, gently, and pressed a kiss against his knuckles.

There would probably be people around them, witnessing every one of their action, some of which probably giggling, some of which probably sending razor-sharp glares at their direction. But with the rough texture that was Koujaku’s skin brushing against his soft lips, all that was in Aoba’s head was how precious this man was – always putting others before him, always putting up a strong front that was way too deceiving for Aoba to believe, and always fighting his own demons by himself, a way he claimed to be protecting Aoba.

“I hope we create more memories, enough to overcome the nasty ones you had in the past,” Aoba looked up at long last, flashing a sprightly grin at Koujaku’s direction.

“Of course,” Koujaku mirrored his grin. “That’s the reason why I’m back.”

And Aoba knew about this.

Of course he did; if not, he wouldn’t be holding Koujaku’s hand in his at this moment, a gesture that was their personal trademark ever since they’d first come to know each other.


	76. More Than Enough; Koujaku/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He knew Koujaku was more than enough, but was he enough?

It was just a thought. Really. Nothing much.

He only realized how things had changed ever since things between him and Koujaku took a rapid turn. There weren’t any palpable differences between them ever since they made their feelings clear as day to each other; but they were sure of the subliminal hint of affection between them that was growing stronger over time. Aoba wasn’t sure how much their confession affected Koujaku, but he sure felt the impact within him now.

Especially when he was sitting in Black Needle, with Kou playing with Ren right beside him and a bitter-smiling Mizuki standing behind the counter that he felt the surrealism rushing towards him like huge waves of tsunami.

“Koujaku sure is famous, isn’t he?” Aoba grumbled under his breath, a statement that he was throwing at himself.

“Koujaku-san?” Kou looked up from Ren’s paw to shoot Aoba a curious look, then nodding agitatedly the moment he realized what Aoba was implying. “Oh, you meant with women. He’s always been like this.”

“I guess so,” Aoba muttered, drowning half a glass of his drink down his throat.

“But Koujaku-san’s been good to everyone, anyway, it’s no surprise that he’s so well-received,” Kou continued upon noticing that Aoba wasn’t going to say more. Pulling Ren to a stand-up position, he fiddled with his two soft paws while he said, “Especially you too, right? Aoba-san.”

Aoba almost choked on his drink. Without answering, he looked over his shoulder, catching sight of Koujaku being surrounded in a mix of men and women, chattering happily away while the crowd admired him all over again. Kou was right – he was great with everyone, he was strong and he even had this bizarrely beautiful outlook that made him stand out even more. He totally had his very own reasons to why he was so popular.

When he reflected on himself, he realized that he wasn’t even comparable to Koujaku. He wasn’t as well-build as him, wasn’t as nice to everyone as he did and of course, wasn’t as beautiful as Koujaku was. He couldn’t find a reason to why Koujaku would choose to confess to him over everyone else.

“Come to think of it, Koujaku-san seemed to treat you better than anyone else, though,” Kou said, head tilted upwards with Ren now slouching on the bar stand.

“You think so?” Aoba’s eyes brightened, surprised as the sudden insight.

“You didn’t notice it yourself? He’s been particularly nice to you all this while, ever since we knew him!”

Now that he mentioned it… Without a doubt, Koujaku had always been a huge worrywart when it came to Aoba – he’d make sure that Aoba was safely home every day, finding chances as much as he could to visit just to make sure that Aoba was fine. When they walked together, Aoba also tended to notice that Koujaku would often escort him into a position where he wouldn’t risk being knocked down by a person, or a vehicle. He presumed Koujaku did all of these out of his own conscious, that it was just his nature to do it, and of course, Koujaku had always been particularly nice to him ever since they knew it each other, making Aoba feel almost no difference between them even after they’d ended up together, besides his own mental state, which was a whole different story altogether.

He could never argue how much Koujaku had done for him despite knowing the fact of how popular he was. But that was precisely why it was so commendable – that Koujaku was able to be _extra_ nice to Aoba even though he already had his hands full with other matters and other persons to be concerned with.

Yet… How about Aoba? Did _he_ do enough for Koujaku? Was whatever he did on the same level as how much Koujaku had done for him?

The thought disturbed him critically. He wasn’t great with words, unlike Koujaku. But now that they had gained themselves an official label, he thought he should buck up to return Koujaku’s favour, at the very least.

Imitating Ren, he slouched on the bar stand, face red from drinking and deep frown gracing his features. “Ugh, I don’t know what to do…”

“Aoba-san, are you alright? Too much alcohol?” Kou asked concernedly while Ren stood up and pressed a paw against Aoba’s warm face.

“My head hurts…” Aoba mumbled, cheek pressed against cold surface.

“Oh no! Mizuki-san—“

“Cold water, here!” Mizuki put a glass of ice-cold water by Aoba’s face without being told. “Man, Koujaku would beat us up if he knows we let you drink too much again.”

Koujaku, again… Koujaku always had everything well thought out. But what about him? Did he even think about Koujaku?

Letting out a disgruntled groan, he grasped the glass of water and drown it down his throat, feeling all the more invigorating with his insides frozen. He couldn’t tell for sure if he had done enough for Koujaku but this frustration he was feeling was real and that could only mean that he was suspecting himself of not meeting his lover quota.

Standing up gruffly, he paced speedily towards Koujaku’s direction, squeezed through the crowd and gripped on his boyfriend’s elbow, taking the other on surprise.

“Aoba? What’s wrong?” Koujaku asked, eyes widened. Everyone else seemed to be looking at him as well, the buzz around the space suddenly fell silent.

“… Let’s go home,” Aoba whispered without looking at Koujaku.

“Are you drunk?” Koujaku chuckled, ruffling Aoba on the hair at the same time.

“No, I’m not…”

“Aoba?”

But Aoba wasn’t looking at him at all. After a torturous long minute of staring, Koujaku patted him on the head, crouching just enough to make out Aoba’s eyes from his lowered head.

“Alright, let’s go home.”

And Aoba didn’t even realize that Koujaku had picked his hand up, intertwined their fingers together and walked out of Black Needle without another word, his discomfiture completely clouded his thoughts.

He wasn’t able to see Koujaku in the eyes for a long time. Night had fallen when they walked, hand-in-hand, down the street. His words stuck in his throat, Aoba could only avert Koujaku’s gaze, even though he knew that Koujaku had been trying to strike a conversation with him for a while now.

“Hey, Aoba.” Ah. Here it comes. “Are you really not drunk? Your face is quite red.”

“I’m completely fine,” his voice a bit too higher tune than usual. “See, I can still walk properly.”

His paces were just _slightly_ wobbly but he was completely fine, that was for sure.

He heard Koujaku chuckle frivolously by his side, turning around just in time to see Koujaku laughing with a hand over his mouth.

“Hey, what’s that for?” Aoba pouted.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” Koujaku said, visibly trying to contain his laughter. “It’s just that it’s so cute when you try to act all tough like that.”

“Excuse me? I’m perfectly tough okay, have you heard of my infamous kick?” That was a lie; the kick was.

But Koujaku nodded all the same.

“Of course I do. That _infamous_ kick that threw me off the bed for countless times.”

“Hey!” Aoba frowned deeper.

“Haha, sorry, sorry, I’m just joking. But of course you’re tough. A lot more than me.”

His last sentence had Aoba gaping, not knowing what else to say. Looking away again, he tightened his clutch on Koujaku’s hand, took a few moments to calm his head down before he started again, the transitory tumult sure had returned his composure to him.

“Koujaku.”

“Hm?”

“Can I ask you something?”

Koujaku seemed to be hesitating, but just for a bit, before he smiled and answered,

“Sure.”

“Is there anything that you want? Anything at all?”

“Hmmm…” Koujaku considered, one hand holding his chin, lifting his head to gaze at a far distance away. “Not really. You are enough.”

Aoba could literally feel the heat rising to his cheeks before he let out a few dry coughs. He knew Koujaku was excellent with sweet nothings, intentional or not, but it still caught him off guard whenever he was to launch an attack at him.

“I mean like, something physical,” he clarified desperately, trying to shoo the fluster out of his head.

“You’re physical.”

“I mean, like an item, or something.” He really had no idea where this conversation was flowing to anymore.

“Hmm,” Koujaku pondered again. But at the end, even when they reached Koujaku’s house, he didn’t give Aoba an answer, leaving him hanging in mid-air and doing nothing but riling Aoba up further.

He knew Koujaku was serious with his answer, but he hated the fact that he couldn’t do anything at him. He hated the fact that Koujaku was always the one doing things for _him_.

“Do you want to have a shower first or—woah!” Koujaku was about to switch the lights on when Aoba lurched towards him, hugging him tightly in his embrace. The abrupt affection astounded Koujaku, but he was quick to press a hand on Aoba’s head, patting him gently as he returned his embrace.

“What’s the matter, tough man?”

He remembered hugging Koujaku like this before Koujaku left the island years back. He remembered asking Koujaku not to go, and he thought that if he was to hug him hard enough he’d be able to make Koujaku stay. But nothing was in his favour then, and now that he was hugging Koujaku again, his face pressed against his bare chest, he could hear the loud thumping of Koujaku’s heart in his years, his warmth spread right onto his skin.

It gave him a sense of nostalgia, but also a layer of intimidation that he wasn’t enough to hold Koujaku by his side if the only card he had in his hands was himself.

“Aoba?” Koujaku called out.

“Don’t put your hope on something so fragile,” Aoba murmured against Koujaku’s chest.

“What do you mean? What’s fragile?”

“…me.”

Even without the need to look, Aoba knew that Koujaku must be looking at him with a gaze that spelled of nothing but disbelief. He felt a few more pats on his head, then a pair of hands lifting his face up so that he was staring at Koujaku’s face before he made out the proper shape of Koujaku’s warm smile.

“I thought you’re a tough man? Well, you _are_. How can you not when I’m alive because of you?”

“But I’m still human,” Aoba countered, hands pressed against the back of Koujaku’s hands.

“You’re Aoba, that’s enough for me. Trust me.”

He was reiterating what he’d told Aoba but this time, it possessed a different meaning to it and to Aoba, it was more than enough – for at this moment, he realized that he wasn’t the only one who had been putting the ‘beautiful’ label on his boyfriend.

Koujaku had, as well.


	77. Ridiculously Sincere; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How to make your dismissive fiance smile the best smile? It’s one challenge Aoba is more than willing to take up.

Honestly, he wouldn’t have minded if Noiz could share tips with him on how to stay compose at vital times.

He’d definitely need that; especially when he was currently flipping through checklists after checklists, just to ensure that they had gotten everything down and ready for their big day.

“I really wish I’m not missing out on anything,” Aoba let out a hefty sigh as he slumped his weight on the couch, greeted instantly by Noiz, who slung an arm around his waist, pressing their bodies together.

“I’m sure everything is fine,” Noiz said. He’d been cracking his head figuring out if he’d left anything out, inadvertently or not. No one gets married every day after all. Especially for Aoba, this was definitely an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and he definitely did not want anything to go wrong at all.

“I’ll have your back if you happen to miss anything out,” Noiz said, an attempt to comfort.

“You know that’s not what I want,” Aoba pouted, sending a glare at Noiz’s direction at the same time. “I just want… you know, everything to be perfect. It’s my—no, _our_ big day.”

Noiz lifted a smile that looked both suggestive and gentle at the same time. “I know. But I really don’t feel like we’ve missed anything out. Well, unless you intend to ditch me in the wedding hall by myself and—“

“Hey, hey, let’s not suggest things that will never happen,” Aoba flicked a finger against his soon-to-be husband’s forehead. After all these years – a good five years of spending time with each other, in fact – Aoba had come to realize how Noiz still held this constant insecurity that Aoba would leave him alone or that he was a mere illusion. Every now and then, he’d find Noiz hugging him a bit firmer than usual when they were both cuddled under their blankets, head pressed against his shoulder as he slept. He must’ve done it unconsciously but while Noiz had grown to be a very fine young man of his own, this trait of his still reminded Aoba fondly of how he still appeared like a nineteen-year-old kid that Aoba had come to know very well.

It was with Aoba that Noiz could let his defence down like that; and Aoba was sure that there was no one else but _him_ who could give Noiz the biggest assurance he needed.

Hence, what Noiz told him was right after all. Even if anything was to go wrong on their Big Day, there was absolutely nothing that they couldn’t solve as long as they had each other’s backs.

Feeling a weight lifted off his chest, he leaned his head against Noiz’s, one hand patting the side of his young fiance’s head as he released a soft hum.

“We’re really getting married, aren’t we?” he mumbled, asking a question that was directed to whoever’s listening in the room.

His question was soon responded by a small nod from Noiz, who turned around just to kiss Aoba on his forehead.

“Yeah, we’re getting married soon. Very soon.”

They needed no labels; but every memories they were to share were exquisite and even though a wedding ceremony, or even the idea of getting married was simply procedures to bond them legally together, they knew that it’d become part of the important memories they yearned to collect together.

It didn’t take too long before they found themselves in an elegant boutique; one that was exclusively hand-picked by Noiz. Aoba had taken over the responsibility to choose the best wedding suits for them. While Noiz let him handle all the necessary processes, Aoba found himself pressured over non-existent problems. He already knew that Noiz would look absolutely gorgeous in anything he was to wear. He had the looks; that goes without saying. And he had the body shape too; his body line consistently becoming more and more mesmerizing over the years they resided together. Aoba was the only person who had come to know this very well, after all. It was simply a great pleasure waking up in the morning to a naked boyfriend who bear muscles and body frame like one who could only catch sight of in a fashion magazine.

Noiz was perfectly fine; he was a natural. But what about _him_? He wasn’t at all self-conscious about his own body. But he was still persistent in making sure that he had all the right measurements, right materials and right details taken into account just so he could stand right beside his future husband with pride swarmed in his chest.

So when they first met each other in their very own set of wedding suits, he was almost laughing when he saw Noiz brighten his eyes, momentarily stunned, before he scanned Aoba from head to toe, visibly unable to believe what he was seeing.

“What is it? Falling for me all over again?” Aoba teased with a smirk. Noiz, however, said nothing. Merely walking up towards Aoba, he continued scrutinizing him, his silence almost making Aoba feel all the more awkward all over again.

“You make me feel like marrying you for multiple times just so I could see you in this outfit again and again,” Noiz said, finally stopping his paces around Aoba and standing right in front of him.

“Well, it’s a special occasion after all,” Aoba grinned with visible faint flushes on his cheekbones. “I need to make sure that I’m perfectly dressed for my perfect husband.”

He almost burst out laughing upon noticing how Noiz’s cheeks were painted with just a dainty tint of pink.

“More like I’m no longer sure if I’m suited for you,” Noiz returned a smirk, which was instantly responded by a soft punch on the arm.

“Oh, c’mon, are you really telling me this? Don’t tell me you aren’t aware of how ladies have been ogling at you every time we attend a formal occasion.”

“I don’t,” Noiz said, completely blunt. “They didn’t matter to me, anyway.”

“ _That_ ,” Aoba emphasized, slinging a hand around Noiz’s arm. “deserves a punch on the head.”

He was well aware of how serious Noiz meant his words but Noiz’s shameless remarks weren’t something he wasn’t used to anyway. It put flusters on him but Noiz was too much of a natural at being shamelessly blunt the way he was that Aoba knew that there was simply no way for him to dismiss that part of Noiz’s personality from him.

It still felt dreamlike that Noiz had chosen _him_ , above every other candidate that’d walked into his life, to share the rest of his life with him.

“Hello, are both of you ready?”

“Oh, yes, we are!”

Their wedding photographer approached them shortly after, directing them to a studio where huge white background were set up.

“Just give me your best smile, alright?” the photographer said from behind an expensive-looking camera.

“What are we supposed to do?” Noiz whispered, the bright flashlights stinging his vision.

“Well, you heard him. Give your best smile,” Aoba responded, pulling one of Noiz’s arms and enveloped it around his waist.

Noiz tried. He really did. Aoba had seen his best smile and it had never failed to send huge swarms of warmth right into his chest. But those smiles weren’t intentional; he knew that much. It was when Noiz was caught off guard that he’d portray such a genuine smile – one that he possibly didn’t even know of.

Which was why the first few takes of their photography was a total disaster. _Not natural enough_ , _too stiff_ , _smile more!_ were amongst the comments they’d received and not before long, Aoba started laughing, a scowling Noiz standing right beside him, visibly distressed.

“C’mon, kiddo,” Aoba wiped a trail of sweat off his cheek as he beamed at him. “You’re wearing such an amazing set of suit. Put on your best smile to complement it, will you?”

It wasn’t easy at all, and Aoba knew it. As an attempt to assist, he raised both his hands, using his fingers and pushed the corners of Noiz’s lips up into a smile.

“There you go,” he smiled goofily. “What a nice smile you have.”

And, before he could stop himself, he tiptoed, pressing a kiss directly at Noiz’s stretched lips and allowing their gentle peck to linger for a few seconds before he pulled himself off.

“You’re marrying _me_ , aren’t you happy?” he asked. A sudden urge to cry attack his insides. Looking at Noiz in this way, seeing how mature his once-brat had turned out to be, and above all, the mere realization of him _marrying_ this very brat pulled an intense surge of emotions out of him before he Noiz grasped both of his hands, _smiling_ at him then kissing him on the forehead.

“Of course I’m happy,” he muttered against Aoba’s hair. “I must be the happiest man in this entire universe now.”

Aoba was sure that he’d break down there and then if he hadn’t been constantly reminding himself that they were in the presence of other people. Aggressively shaking his head, he pouted at Noiz, before he turned to look at the photographer.

“Sorry, can we try again?” he asked, just to be responded by a thumbs up.

“I’ve gotten the shot we need.”

“Huh?”

And when that very shot was shown to them, it’d taken every ounce of Aoba’s nerves to stop himself from tearing up – that very image of him pulling a smile on Noiz’s face as he kissed him totally crushed him from the inside.

Sincerity, nonchalance; weren’t those what that had pulled them together? And now, as they stared at how ridiculously adorable both of them could look like even under the eyes of outsiders, it only proved how much chemistry they’d shared with each other – to the extent that earnestness had become the most natural dynamic they shared with each other and portrayed out of their own control.

Even without the need to try too hard.

Labels weren’t needed, after all.

But _this_ photo would definitely stay in the most precious part of their photo album as they continued walking their life together, and as they encountered more and more similarly outlandish incidences like this.


	78. Jump Scare; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How does it feel being lost in your own house? Aoba certainly never want to experience that ever again.

He was perfectly used to staying by himself. It was his very own comfort zone and in this zone, he was guaranteed safety, for sure. He was familiar with everything after all. He knew exactly where everything was located and he was sure that he had everything under control.

…well, that was if he was still staying in his house in Midorijima, though.

He’d already expected himself to take time to get used to his new surrounding when he moved to Germany with Noiz. Not only that the extravagance of their new apartment had made him drop his jaws, he also needed to get used to using new-fangled furniture; the auto-lock function of the main door often locked him outside of the house before he had to send an emergency call to Noiz, who would always give him a look that presaged strappingly of tease before he finally opened the door for him. He definitely needed time to get used to where items were positioned as well, trying hard not to accidentally hurt himself if he was to bump into the corners of tables that’d give him bruises Noiz would cringe looking at.

He was getting there, slowly but surely.

But when it came to situations where lights were dimmed and sea of greyish black was everything he could see, he found cold sweat running down his back, instantly regretting the decision to use the bathroom at 3:00 in the morning.

He peeked through the door, glancing around, trying to locate the switch but to no avail. Cursing inwardly at how he’d managed to forget to remember the location of one of the most important items in the house, he pushed the door opened, unhurriedly and cautiously, and took one step out of his room.

It drown him in a sense of weird nostalgia when he was reminded of how he used to tiptoe around the house at night time when he was young. When Granny used to be late from work, she’d leave Koujaku with him where both of them would do exactly what he was doing now, searching through the dark and finding their way as if they were on some sort of dark night adventure. But now, he only had himself; he’d decided to leave Ren alone, figuring that he wouldn’t want to disturb Ren for something as trivial as going to the bathroom for a quick release. He needed to learn how not to depend too much on his AllMate after all, especially not when he had already been doing so for most of the navigations he’d been conducting around this new town.

Finally finding his way down the corridor, he took vigilant steps, careful not to make too much noise and awareness heightened so that he won’t inadvertently step on something, his hand pressed against the wall, eyes stayed alert and found a way to where a room was located, one that he was _sure_ that it belonged to the bathroom.

Heaving a relieved breath, he lifted a small smile, opened the door, again, as quietly as he could, and walked into the room –

– just to realize that it was _not_ the bathroom.

Pronouncing a silent ‘oops’ in his head, he quickly closed the door, then leaned against the wall to catch his breath.

It was _Noiz’s_ room and if he was to make too much of a sound, he could potentially wake his boyfriend up and that was the last thing he wanted to do, especially not when he had work early in the morning. As he rubbed a hand against his chest, he took deeper breaths again, feeling his heart thumping stridently against his ribcage. Noiz would _so_ laugh at him if he knew what happened tonight. He could’ve strode right into the room and only realizing a minute later that a bathroom couldn’t be so big and so dry.

A few moments of tramping silence later, he turned a different direction, rummaging his way out of where he came from again and searched around the place. The bathroom can’t be _that_ far away, right? he wondered to himself. The last he remembered, it was only a few steps away from his room; Noiz had specifically pointed the directions to him when the day was still bright.

He can’t believe he was losing his way now.

And what was worse was that he was starting to hear unnecessary sounds in his ears, saw unnecessary shadows from the corner of his eyes and he was about to give up on his intention to head to the bathroom when he felt a weight on his back, then two arms enveloping him from the back that had pulled an ear-splitting scream out of him.

He struggled, but whoever’s holding him was too strong for him and after a few seconds of futile tussle, he settled down, turning his head back just to see Noiz resting his chin on his shoulder, his eyes still closed.

“N-Noiz…?” he mumbled, feeling the sore in his throat.

Noiz seemed like he wasn’t even awake. Soft snores escaped his lips, he merely nodded thoughtlessly when Aoba called out to him. Until Aoba patted him on the head that he snapped one sleepy eye open, looking up to meet Aoba’s eyes.

“What are you doing at this hour?” he asked with feeble voice.

“W-well, I was about to head to the bathroom but I can’t find my way,” Aoba admitted with voice similarly small as Noiz’s.

“It’s that way,” Noiz pointed his chin to an opposite direction. “Right beside my room.”

Oh, so he _was_ near just now. He didn’t remember the direction wrongly; he simply needed to take _one_ more step and he’d be able to reach his destination safe and sound.

But instead, the fright overwhelmed him and clouded his rational justification, making him feel like an idiot.

“Go back to sleep,” he said to Noiz, dragging both of their weights down the corridor, with Noiz still clinging onto him. Well, at least Noiz’s presence eased the atmosphere for him.

Perhaps he should consider knocking Noiz up the next time he was to head to the bathroom; and perhaps, he’d need to remind himself again, for the countless times, that he was never alone wherever he was, even when he was practically staying in a place five thousand miles away from home.


	79. Hallo!; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes he has to remind himself that Germany wasn’t just… Germany; it’s also Berlin, Munich… and a lot more.

Aoba never thought of working at Heibon as a chore, even if it meant having him to do regular delivery by running around the place at most times. He deemed himself to possess enough stamina for the job and unquestionably, seeing things in town had been one of his favourite pastimes. He wouldn’t mind the running around.

And he was even more grateful that his job had shaped him up into the ideal state for him when he was now, walking on a busy Berlin street with Noiz, hand-in-hand, having walked non-stop for the past three hours.

“You don’t feel tired at all?” he asked Noiz, who merely released a truncated hum then turning around to give him a suggestive sideway look.

“Not at all. You?”

“Nope,” Aoba replied almost instantly. “I used to run around a lot, you know? This is nothing for me.”

“Of course.” Noiz’s tone sounded as if he was mocking him but Aoba decided to let the case rest. He’d looked forward to this day off with Noiz, partly because he’d be able to spend more time with Noiz after both of them being distracted by their daily obligations, but another half was that he’d be able to see more of Germany; one that’d become his home.

“It’s kind of surprising,” he said, looking into a distance and catching the top of Reichstag Building popping its head out.

“What is?” Noiz asked, eyes fixed at another angle, where they could see a row of restaurants buzzing with busy lunch crowd.

“I always thought Germany would have a lot of tall corporate buildings, probably influenced by you.”

“Me?”

“Uhuh,” Aoba nodded. “You’re all professional and formal when you returned. I thought I’m intruding a world that’s too different for me.”

Noiz released a nimble chuckle. “Germany has its professional side too.”

“I know about that too,” Aoba pouted. “But now, I don’t feel any of it.”

“So what do you feel instead?” Noiz continued asking, curiosity evident in his tone.

“More of… artistic? Hmm, modern? No, that’s not the right word.”

“Sophisticated?” Noiz helped.

“Ah, yeah, that’s it!” Aoba grinned radiantly. “Something like that. It’s amazing.”

By now, they’d visited most of the historical buildings in Berlin – Brandenburg Gate, Pergamon Museum, the Historical Museum, Berlin Cathedral. At one point, Noiz suggested for a sightseeing tour, which had Aoba rejecting it in an instant. “Traveling is meant for you to flex your muscles. What’s the point if we just sit around and letting people decide what to do for us?” was his reason for it and which effectively shut Noiz up, having him to silently wonder how much more endearing Aoba could be.

He’d caught sight of how Aoba seemed to be much more enthusiastic about these landmarks, a lot more than himself. Then, he reminded himself that he’d never once seen Aoba being plummeted over anything at all, regardless of what it was to be. Perhaps it was that sort of positive energy that had been holding Noiz up. Aoba was the one who’d supported him all this while after all, and rightfully so.

“Okay, now I’m hungry,” Aoba grumbled; he seemed to have noticed the lunch crowd in the various restaurants they were passing by.

“Stop for a bite?” Noiz suggested.

Aoba nodded eagerly. “Let’s.”

Most of the places were full by now. Locating one place that didn’t seem to be too congested in one corner of the street, they settled down outside of the shop, greeted by a lady with a perky grin plastered on her face – “ _Hallo!_ ” – and buried their faces behind the menu.

“I don’t know what’s good,” Aoba mumbled. Presented in front of them were choices both too lavish and too much for their options. He didn’t know how any of these tasted, let alone knowing how to decide the best meal for himself. Looking warily over the table at Noiz, he noticed that his boyfriend wasn’t any better than him either. Well, at least he knew how to read most of the complicated-looking food names in those menu.

“I don’t know, either,” Noiz said at long last. “But I’ve heard good things about some of the food here.”

“Oh, really?” Aoba’s eyes brightened, a weight lifted off his chest. “I leave the order to you then. But,” he paused with a stern glare. “not too much, alright? I don’t want to walk around with a bloated tummy later.”

Noiz smiled meekly. “Sure.”

What came under Aoba’s nose after a fifteen minutes wait was what he was more than familiar with. He remembered trying it out during the first few days when he arrived at Germany, being totally confounded by it. He remembered learning the term from Ren, being one of the first German words he remembered.

“ _Currywurst_?” he spelled out, causing Noiz to quirk an eyebrow.

“You’ve tried?”

“We have it near our apartment…” he trailed away.

“Oh,” Noiz said, visibly uninformed of the information. “Should I order something else then?”

“No, no, it’s fine!” Aoba shook his hands. “I’m good with _currywurst_.”

He was being honest. _Currywurst_ was delicious. And it even tasted nostalgic now that he was eating it in a different part of the country.

“You know, there’s always this thing you do when you eat a sausage,” Noiz started after a momentary silence in which both of them indulged in their meal.

“Hmmm?” Aoba hummed, mouth full.

“The way you would lick the tip before you bite on it,” Noiz described, eyes darkened just a bit, one hint that Aoba wasn’t able to overlook. “It’s kind of erotic.”

Aoba swallowed down his food with a big gulp, lurching over the table to smack Noiz on the head.

“You’re thinking too much! I’m trying to eat here.”

“Keep trying,” Noiz smirked.

“Noiz!” Aoba growled. In a desperate attempt to switch topic, he pointed towards Noiz’s plate of food. “What’s your food?”

“ _Wurstsalat_. It’s sausages too, just salad.”

“Heh, people here sure like sausages, huh?”

“Who knows?” Noiz shrugged, poking his fork into one of the sausage slices. “Maybe.”

“Do you like sausages too?” Aoba asked, which did nothing but drawing a deeper smirk out of Noiz.

“ _Of course_.”

Sensing the hint, he shut his mouth, going back to eat and feeling heat rushing to his cheeks.

He knew Noiz didn’t mean to take everything so literally suggestive. And he was sure that Noiz only did it to witness his reaction.

One day, he’d find the best method to counterattack him. But for now, when Noiz stretched an arm and wiped the sauce stain from the corner of his mouth, he thought perhaps he could let himself being pampered while he set the weight off his shoulders.

With Noiz.


	80. Next To You; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My home is next to you. Yours?

Whenever he was to sit and contemplate about everything that had ever happened to him, he always found himself caught in a whirlpool of surrealism, sometimes pondering if he wasn’t dreaming or he was merely living a lie. Everything happened so fast that he didn’t have enough time to respond; before he knew it, he was packing his bag, preparing to leave this very hometown he’d resided in for the rest of his life and depart towards a land that was so very foreign to him.

He’d never left Midorijima before, let alone knowing how Germany even felt like.

Needless to say, qualms were visible, over-exaggeration of knowledge he’d read from books and countless websites gave him an impression so unbelievably extraneous that the moment he stepped into the airplane, he found cold sweat running down his spine.

Noiz had been trying to comfort him with his best effort at all times now but he knew that Aoba needed time and he wasn’t one to take that away from him. That was why he told him that he could take all the time he needed and he could even return if he deemed Germany being an unfitting place for him to reside. But that was the last thing Aoba would do. Whining about a new environment wasn’t part of his behaviour and never would be. So instead of describing every one of his discomfort at Noiz, he merely nodded, smiling as he grasped Noiz tighter on the hand, hoping that the agitation within him would disappear soon.

Germany wasn’t all that bad. Well, at least it wasn’t as bad as he imagined it to be. He was reinvigorated by the new atmosphere, confounded by words and buildings and _people_ he’d never seen before in his entire life. But above all, he was enthralled by how _different_ yet similar Noiz could behave in a completely diverse surrounding he was in. It was then that Aoba needed to remind himself that this was Noiz’s hometown after all. Perhaps he’d feel more at ease than when he was in Midorijima.

He didn’t know how Noiz felt about it, but he certainly knew how _he himself_ felt about it.

He told Noiz that he would be fine, and he really would. Their first day passed by in a breeze; his body sore from the long flight, his mind overwhelmed by new knowledge and luxury Noiz showered him. All he needed was a good night rest and he was all ready to embark on a whole new journey with Noiz by his side.

…or that was what he thought.

Noiz had given him a big room of his own. He’d told him that he could do anything he wanted with it; he could even change the furniture in it if he wanted. But that wasn’t what Aoba wanted. As he turned and trundled on the bed, he found himself unable to sleep; his mind should be very exhausted, so was his body. But no matter how he forced himself to fall asleep, it was no use. Finally sitting up, he squinted through the darkness, the feeling of being _alone_ in a place thousands of miles away from home and in a room that was so big and filled with _nothing_ but him made him feel all the more out of place. He laid back down, rolling and burying his face against the pillow, smelling in scent he never knew.

… _Noiz_.

He rolled to his back, staring at the ceiling. Noiz was just next door; they were literally living under the same roof. But now, they were separated by a wall, being _alone_ in their own rooms, with nothing but their AllMates as their companions.

This didn’t feel right at all. He didn’t travel away from his hometown just to be alienated like this. Sure, Noiz might have considered about his privacy; heck, he might even be worried that Aoba wasn’t able to get used to him yet. But what was with this concern when they practically shared intimate moments with each other before? They didn’t feel awkward when they slept together in the hotel in Platinum Jail before they flew here, either.

So was there a need for this separation?

Aoba’s head was running on a tread mill. He knew that he was merely telling himself convictions that was meant to make himself feel better. But ultimately, as he let out a heavy sigh and stood up from his bed, he knew that _he_ was the one that needed the assurance, and that there was no use trying to deny it when he obviously _yearned_ for it.

He walked out of his room, searched around the dark and located the room where Noiz had told him that it was his room. He pressed his ear against the door. There was no sound in it. Was Noiz asleep already? he wondered. Attempting to find out, he knocked on the door. Softly – once, twice. But there was no response. Assuming that Noiz had fallen asleep, he was about to pace back when he halted, feeling the heavy weight beneath his chest.

He’d just met Noiz less than an hour ago and he missed him already. He felt pathetic for it but there was no way he could dismiss the feeling – not until he saw Noiz. Again.

So he took a deep breath, strode towards the door, and opened it, as slowly and as quietly as he could.

“Noiz?” he called out, a whisper.

The room remained quiet. Closing the door cautiously behind him, he tiptoed towards the bed, where he found Noiz sleeping under the sheets, his body rolled to his side, his breathing relaxed and steady.

He stood and stared for a few moments before a small smile elevated from the corners of his lips. He missed Noiz, that was undoubtedly true. He still remembered how Noiz smiled at him and how he told him to take his own pace and how he kissed him goodnight before they parted ways. But yet, here he was, creeping under the sheets of his young boyfriend and leaning as warily as he could towards him.

Ah, this is it, he thought. The scent he was so familiar with. Noiz had given him an astounded look when Aoba indulged in his scent back when he was still admitted in the hospital. Ever since then, Aoba had had the scent memorized, every bit of it gave him a sense of nostalgia, especially now when he was moved out of his comfort zone.

Instinctively, he inched closer, almost pressing his face against Noiz’s back when Noiz moved, catching him off guard.

“Didn’t know you have the habit to sneak into people’s room.” Noiz’s voice vibrated close to him, sending cold sweat all over his body.

“W-well, I…”

But instead of waiting for Aoba to finish his words, Noiz embraced him into a firm hug, patting his head and pressing it against his chest.

“Homesick?” he asked, voice small but earnest.

Was he homesick? Aoba wondered. He knew that he crept into Noiz’s room because he missed Noiz. But now that he thought about it, perhaps Noiz was right after all. Noiz was the closest feeling to home that he had now, and the impulse to be close to him was probably a loud sign of how much he missed home; of how much he missed everything he was familiar with.

Nodding silently, Aoba buried his face against Noiz’s chest, listening to the strong heartbeats against his boyfriend’s chest. Noiz caressed his head for a few moments, playing with a few strands of his hair before he leaned downwards to kiss Aoba on the head.

“You can go home anytime you want,” he said, which Aoba responded by pushing him on the chest.

“My home is here,” he said, both his gaze and voice firmed.

Noiz’s eyes brightened, visibly taken by surprise, but just momentarily. Lifting a smirk, he pecked Aoba gently on the cheek, then encircled him into a warm embrace again, their chests pressed against each other, their breathing mingling in the cold air.

“My home is wherever you are too,” he muttered, feeling Aoba returning his embrace.

Aoba wasn’t sure if Noiz truly understood what he meant when he said that to Noiz. But, while he dozed off to sleep, he thought about how Noiz was still awake when he sneaked into the room, and how Noiz was hugging him in such an affectionate way now – a way that made him feel as if he wasn’t ready to let him go anytime soon – that was creating huge ripples of emotions from within him.

Perhaps Noiz, like him, wasn’t able to sleep well as well. Perhaps for the same reason as himself.

But Noiz, unlike him, held too much reservations to approach Aoba for his own need that he might deem to be selfish, the reason being a consideration towards Aoba’s feelings.

He wasn’t ready to let him go, and he knew Noiz was the same. And if Noiz needed a home, he’d give him a home, regardless of what form it would take.


	81. Caught In Heat; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skin contact is all I need from you, and is all I need to feel.

He shouldn’t have let Noiz know that his alcohol tolerance was low.

He was well aware of this very fact, and was of course, well aware of how cagey Noiz could be towards him if he ever did so much as bringing a wine glass to his lips. But being able to drink was more like a necessity in Germany, and he, at the very least, didn’t want to be the person who’d embarrass Noiz in public occasions where drinking would definitely be part of the agenda.

He’d learned to be a better drinker, but apparently, not good enough for Noiz to stop taking his glass away and drink for him whenever a new glass of alcohol was pushed towards him.

He’d told Noiz off, warned him even, that he was fine with drinking and that he wouldn’t need to worry much since Noiz was with him anyway.

But obviously, Noiz’s level of concern was in a league too far for him to attain. Or else, he wouldn’t find himself supporting a wobbly Noiz into their bedroom, the smell of alcohol thick in the air as he slumped his boyfriend steadily on the bed, then sighing loudly at the scene in front of him.

“How many times do I need to remind you that you are no superhuman, huh?”

Noiz wasn’t entirely knocked out; Aoba could tell that much from the way he spotted a glint of lime-green from under his half-opened eyes.

“I’ll get you some water,” was the last thing he said before he heard movement from behind him then a firm grasp on the wrist that he halted his tracks, looking over his shoulder and hitching a breath when he noticed how Noiz had sat up and gripping onto him, with intense heat obvious in his eyes.

“Don’t go,” he said simply, voice low and hoarse. It did things to Aoba.

“I’m just gonna get you some water. I’m not going anywhere,” Aoba rectified. But one hard tug later, he found himself tumbling into his boyfriend’s embrace, hot breath smearing his cheeks with two arms wrapping around his torso, hugging him from behind.

“Hey…” he called out. “Are you okay?”

“Hm,” Noiz merely hummed. Propping his head on Aoba’s shoulder, he closed his eyes, breathing slow and hefty. “My head hurts.”

“That’s because you drank too much,” Aoba chuckled.

Noiz didn’t say anything after that. All that Aoba could make out from him was unhurried, heavy breathing that almost made him think that he’d accidentally fallen asleep. But then, while he was thinking of a way to make his way out of this very embrace without disturbing Noiz too much, a hand sneaked from his waist to his chest, then to his chin.

“Hey.” Noiz’s voice was perilously low. The moment his whispering seduction trundled into Aoba’s ear, Aoba found his heart skipping a beat, swallowing down his throat when his chin was pushed, gently yet impatiently, towards Noiz’s direction.

His eyes were ones of a predator, catching Aoba in a daze and pushing him into a deeper whirlpool of intensity when Noiz pecked lightly on his lips.

“I want you,” Noiz said, which did nothing but escalating the already sweltering emotions within Aoba.

“Didn’t you have a headache?” Aoba protested insipidly. Noiz’s other hand had slipped under his shirt, caressing the fair skin of his abdomen, his eyes fixed pungently at Aoba.

“Can you cure it for me?” Noiz let out a small laugh, catching Aoba off guard. And despite knowing Noiz was a man with actions, he still found himself gaping when Noiz pushed his lips towards him once more, biting tantalizingly on his lower lip before he thrust his tongue into Aoba’s mouth.

“Nng…” Quiet moans slipped between their lips, sweat damping their skin. Aoba’s hair was in a mess, but so was his conscious self. He didn’t even notice when Noiz took his shirt off, his palm incredibly hot on his skin.

“Noiz…” he called out when Noiz left his mouth alone and proceeded to lick him on the neck.

“Hm?” The small vibration that spread across his sensitive skin gave him goose bumps.

“You’re so hot.”

Another small chuckle. He didn’t know what he’d said to earn such a loveable reaction from Noiz. All he knew was that Noiz was _yearning_ for him and he wasn’t going to let him go until he found a way to subside this heat – a way that he was sure that would earn him another day of bed the next day.

“It’s your fault I’m like this,” Noiz mumbled against his skin. While Aoba wiped the sweat off his forehead, he’d proceeded to twirl a playful tongue around his nipple, both hands gripping onto his waist to keep him in place. “Take responsibility, will you?”

Aoba didn’t need to be told twice. Shutting his eyes tightly, his hands flew to Noiz’s hair, a strangled gasp escaped his mouth when Noiz gripped onto his half-hard erection, pumping it with intense strength without a warning.

“Ah… Noiz!”

He could feel Noiz all over him – kisses on his torso, aroused cock in the other’s hand, and ferocious stare at him that was conveying a vulgar, nonverbal “ _I want you_ ” over and over again. Noiz had been clingy with him all this while; it wasn’t anything new to Aoba. But in this moment of time, he felt as if Noiz was intending to use absolutely _all_ of his five senses to _feel_ him, to _devour_ him and to mark him as his over and over again.

He wasn’t allowed a time to breathe. When he opened his mouth, he found Noiz’s tongue in it, sucking on his tongue, licking on his teeth. And when he did as much as opening his eyes, he found Noiz’s staring powerfully at him, his face red and frenzied, every inch of his skin felt as if he was burning his mark onto Aoba.

“I can’t wait anymore,” Noiz let out a low growl. His hand was damped with Aoba’s pre-cum and one swift pull later, Aoba was towed off his pants, with Noiz’s finger sneaking to his hole, warning him of what was to happen next.

“W-wait—“Aoba yelped. Their foreplay was usually longer than this. He knew Noiz loved to savour the sight of Aoba drowning in ecstasy, his high being triggered and brought up, slowly yet surely, with every passing second. But now, when one finger sank into his body, Aoba realized that this wasn’t the usual deliberate lovemaking they were used to; but it was exasperated, deprivation of each other clear as sky and definitely a loud roar of _raw_ desire.

“Are you okay?” Noiz sounded as if he was growing out of breath. Droplets of sweat fell onto Aoba’s body, mingling with his own sweat as he led his hand towards his own erection, rubbing it so as to assist Noiz to speed up his preparation.

“Ah… a bit… more,” he struggled, eyes compactly shut. It was hot; Noiz’s fingers were hot inside him, and he knew that his insides was no less burning. Noiz’s gaze was searing into his, his skin felt like it’s boiling from the inside out. He was apparent that he wasn’t completely drunk at this point of time, but the alcohol did things to him, without a doubt. And when three fingers were pushed into him, Aoba gripped hard on the head of his own dick, stopping him from coming then and there.

“E-enough… Noiz,” he moaned. Speedily registering the hint, Noiz drew his fingers out, straightening himself up and taking his shirt off, the visual of him towering over Aoba and stripping himself in such a hasty, aggravated way had Aoba staring in reverence.

Sometimes he’d forget that Noiz was an actual nineteen-year-old man. When he looked at the way raw desire pooled in his eyes and the way fine lines of his torso were portrayed so exotically beautiful in such a stark-naked way, he realized that Noiz wasn’t as much of a brat as he thought he was. Sure, he could be immature at some points of the journey of growth he was going through, but he was mature enough to know what he was doing and what he wanted to do – and at this very moment, in the bedroom, in this heated space where he possessed this raw, powerful instinct to let his desire loose, all Aoba could see was a ravenous wolf, dick overpowered his head and Aoba being his only target as it always was.

“I’m going in.” That was the last thing he said before Aoba found his mind being wiped blank, the pointed thrust hitting him right in the hilt had him arching his back with loud moans leaking from his mouth.

“Haha… you’re so tight.” He didn’t even know if Noiz was laughing at him or he was purely having fun; the impulsive thrusts that came after totally threw his self-conscious out of the window.

“Ah, Noiz, stop! Slower!” he exclaimed, but he was sure that his voice wasn’t able to reach Noiz because then all he heard was more stumpy growls that had more precum leaking from the slit of his dick.

Never had he felt lovemaking to be so intense and so _hot_ to the extent that he was almost feeling his insides burning up. And never in his life would he expect himself to come so fast, semen spilling from his dick when Noiz hit the same sweet spot over and over again, even without he himself knowing.

And he was sure that his head was playing tricks at him when Noiz released inside him shortly after he’d come, his seeds felt hotter than usual, so as his entire body when he let his weight fall on him, their chests rise and fall profoundly as they attempted to regain their breathing.

“Oi…” Aoba called out, pushing a tad on Noiz. “It’s sticky, get off, let me clean myself before we fall asleep.”

But all that he heard of response was Noiz’s silent snores, urging him to brush the silky strands of hair and releasing a relieved sigh at the same time.

“I really need to stop myself from falling into your flow again and again, you know?” he whispered, hugging Noiz’s head close to his chest as he closed his eyes, feeling lethargy attacking him, an after-effect of a contrastingly pacific afterglow. “At this rate, my body won’t be able to take it…” he trailed off at the end, falling asleep, his last thought being if Noiz would still remember anything when he woke up the next morning.

And if it was okay to leave both of them naked like this, cum all over them and with half of Noiz’s dick still inside him.


	82. Level Difference; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing of you is dirty, of course nothing is.

Three months. It wasn’t a long time, wasn’t short either, at least not for both Aoba and Noiz. It was three whole months of hesitance, and of anxiety - three whole months of uncertainty and three whole months of self-doubt. Frankly, Aoba never knew how to respond when he saw Noiz after three whole months of wait - was he supposed to be angry? Or happy? Or both? But at the end of the day, all that he did was stare at Noiz as he gaped, then feeling the infuriation fueling within him before he burst the long-awaited question out at him:

“ _Where have you been?_ ”

It didn’t matter at the end of the day anyway. Sure, Noiz never told him anything when he left, never gave Aoba the preparation he thought he deserved. But all of those didn’t matter anymore. Noiz had his own reasons and Aoba should be the person who understood that the best; it was the same conviction he’d been relentlessly telling himself for these whole three months after all. What mattered was that Noiz was back now - in one piece, with that familiar smirk plastered on his face, with that voice that was reverberating a hint of gentleness that wasn’t present when Aoba first met him.

It was the Noiz he knew very well, despite his entire new outlook taking him completely off guard.

And of course, when he settled his mind down at the end of the day, the only thing that mattered the most to Aoba was that he was waking up to a sleeping Noiz by his side, on the very day he was to start a new day with this very person who’d changed his entire life.

He’d witnessed Noiz’s sleeping face for countless times now, ever since he’d taken up the guardian role willingly when Noiz was admitted into the hospital… or even earlier.

He always thought that Noiz looked exactly like his age when he was asleep - the peaceful sleeping face with an intermittent frown in between his eyebrows that occasionally worried Aoba if he was having a nightmare. He loved gazing at Noiz’s face, being one of his favorite pastimes, and he loved it the most when Noiz sneaked his arms unconsciously towards Aoba while he was still visibly asleep, gripping him wherever he could reach as if he was reaching out to a sanctuary. It was then that Aoba would return his touch with one of his own, pressing his hand against Noiz’s on his waist, inching closer then brushing their noses together.

“Good morning,” he whispered. Noiz was almost awake, he knew it. Soon enough, his young boyfriend lifted a pair of bleary eyes in the next second, blinking a few times until Aoba came into full clear view that he elevated a smile. And sure enough, he enveloped Aoba into a firm hug then, burying his head in Aoba’s chest before Aoba heard a sleepy ‘M’nin’ from the nineteen-year-old brat.

“Hey, hey, aren’t we late to the airport?” Aoba chuckled. Noiz’s fine strands of hair brushed against his chest, tickling him. Despite Aoba’s urgent pester, all Noiz did was pressing his cheek against Aoba’s torso, tilting his head just enough to catch Aoba looking down at him.

“Breakfast.”

“W-what?”

Noiz was always unpredictable, but yet, Aoba always allowed himself to be dragged into his pace, just so he could see what he was up to, his curiosity completely overtaken him. This time, Noiz didn’t bother to explain anything before he pulled himself out of Aoba’s clutch, sliding his way downwards where he found Aoba’s still-soft erection.

“O-oi, we’re gonna be– ah!”

He was so sure that they were going to be late. And he wanted so much to tell Noiz exactly that when Noiz pressed his lips against the tip of his dick and kissed it.

Aoba was given only few seconds to catch his breath while Noiz left his dick alone and stretched his hand, slipping it under his pillow and pulled out what looked like an aluminum-foiled packet.

“What’s that?” Aoba asked, voice wary. The occurrence last night still haunted him. By now, he was more than aware about how adventurous Noiz could be when it came to physical contact. This was perhaps the next new tool he was about to introduce to Aoba.

“This?” Noiz waved the packet in front of him with two fingers. “Plate for breakfast.”

His answer did nothing but confuse Aoba even further. Overwhelmed by a mixed emotions of curiousity and anticipation, he swallowed down his throat as Noiz pulled the packaging open with his mouth, tearing it apart and revealing why looked like an elastic material.

What was Noiz about to do? Was that some sort of bondage or…? Then, as if reminded of something, Aoba’s eyes brightened, finally remembering where he’d seen that very item before.

It was a condom.

“Stay still and let me do the rest,” Noiz smirked, his sleepiness nowhere to be seen. Did he intend to make Aoba his breakfast? Aoba wondered. The realization gave him a clear idea of where this was going so he closed his eyes, hitching a breath when he felt Noiz’s warm and wet mouth engulfing the whole of his head, sucking hard enough for slurpy sounds to resound all over the space. Noiz wasn’t the best when it came to giving head but it was more than enough for Aoba’s dick to grow in hardness with just a few impatient sucks and while Noiz lifted his body up, wiping his lips with the back of his hand with what was undeniably a satisfactory grin, Aoba could only cover his eyes with his hands, too embarrassed to witness what was about to happen next.

“How do you want me to do it? My hand or my mouth?”

Was Noiz asking him a question?

“Whatever you want,” Aoba hastily replied. “Why are you using that anyway?”

“Didn’t want to dirty the place anymore, don’t we?” He could clearly hear Noiz’s tease in his voice alone.

The latex material was soon covering the whole of Aoba’s hardened dick, in which Noiz had chosen the former option and rubbed it with just enough force to bring it up to maximum hardness. His gesture was intimate, yet impatient, leaving Aoba to ponder his fate when Noiz leaned his weight on him, pressing their chests together and bringing their faces close to each other.

“So, how do you want to do it today?” Noiz mumbled hotly, eyes fixed expectantly on Aoba’s.

“Anything you want.” Truth be told, even if Noiz was to ask him, he had absolutely no idea how they should do it, especially not when he was being taken completely off guard by this new initiative. His perception of sex was a whole different level with his boyfriend but he wasn’t in any way unreceptive towards what Noiz wanted to do so the decision staff was usually handed to Noiz with great will.

Instead of giving him an answer, Noiz shifted his eyes to take a quick glance at the clock by the bedside table as a frown formed on his face.

“We don’t have much time,” he mumbled, the sly smirk quick to return to his face. “A quick one then. We’ll have plenty of time for ourselves when we reach there anyway.”

That was what Aoba had been trying to tell him, at least the first part of it. Noiz’s kiss was something he’d come to remember very well: he still remembered the first time they kissed - when Noiz still had his piercing on his tongue - that he felt how unskilled yet how passionate this very brat was. He remembered when they shared kisses in the hospital ward, again and again, on the lips, on his cheek, on his forehead, in his mouth. He remembered all of Noiz’s kisses. And when they finally shared a kiss again after their reunion, Noiz’s ‘I’ve been wanting to do this for so long’ had his heart skipping a beat. Because he was the one who had wanted to do this with Noiz; the separation was a suffering frustration of its own. To have Noiz returning his feelings made him feel as if the whole wait was worth it after all.

When Noiz slipped his tongue into his mouth, tracing it along his teeth and then giving the roof of it a teasing lick, Aoba wanted so much for something to cling onto that he found himself embracing Noiz in a tight hug. He could do this with Noiz forever - kissing him, hugging him, making him feel so much warmth that it was hard to forget. Maybe if they were to do this enough, they would eventually feel each other’s presence by their side despite them being physically apart. The kiss was taking their breath away, heavy panting filled the room, both their faces flustered, both their eyes stuck at each other, darkened with intense lust.

He could feel his precum leaking from his tip, the condom giving him a sense of frustration that he’d never feel before. Struggling to break himself off this suffering, he sneaked a hand in between their bodies and was about to pull the condom off when Noiz bit him on the tongue, effectively stopping him.

“Leave it,” Noiz said, out of breath.

“But…”

“You’ll feel better soon.” And as if attempting to demonstrate that very promise, Noiz joined his hand on his dick, positioning his own dick against Aoba and rubbed both of them together, instantly drawing a loud moan out of Aoba.

Noiz usually preferred a bit of pain, Aoba was quick to realize. So he wasn’t at all surprised when Noiz pressed their dick hard against each other, rubbing with force so aggressive that Aoba was starting to see stars in his eyes.

“Ah, wai– Noiz! I–”

“Ugh.” Noiz’s low growl almost made him come then and there; the tension kept increasing, his head clouded with nothing but a layer of heat, his voice spelling of nothing but unrestrained moans and relentless ‘Noiz, Noiz, Noiz’. He could already feel himself reaching the edge. With a desperate attempt to tell Noiz, he gripped Noiz on the shoulders, scratching on his skin and with just one hard tug, he arched his back, coming in Noiz’s hand and feeling a warm, wet sensation spurting all over his abdomen at the same time.

So much for not wanting to dirty the sheets. While Aoba was catching his breath, Noiz had lifted himself up again, hovering above Aoba just to indulge in the afterglow of Aoba’s expression.

“Five more minutes for breakfast,” was something Aoba didn’t expect to hear when he felt Noiz pulling the condom off his dick, opening his eyes just in time to see Noiz holding the cum-filled condom in front of his face.

“Wait,” Aoba’s head was suddenly back to its full gear again. “Wait, wait, wait, don’t tell me–”

“Thanks for the meal.”

He thought his head would overheat and he’d get a heat stroke there and then when Noiz brought the condom to his lips and emptied the semen into his mouth.

“ _Goddammit, Noiz!_ “Aoba shrieked.

“What?” Noiz asked with impassive thick on his features. A lick of the spilled semen from the corner of Noiz’s lip was more than enough to send a shiver down Aoba’s spine.

“Y-you… You don’t drink that!”

“Why not?”

“It’s dirty!”

“Nothing of you is dirty, I said that before, remember? Besides, I haven’t tasted all of yours before either.”

That was true. Aoba was the one who’d drank all of Noiz’s semen in the first place anyway.

“Wanna try mine again?” Noiz had dipped his finger into the pool of cum he released on Aoba’s stomach, raising it towards Aoba’s mouth when Aoba pushed him away, off the bed, and dashed towards the bathroom.

He could already tell how adventurous his life in Germany would be, because Noiz’s shamelessness was definitely in a completely whole new level from what he initially thought.


	83. Ten Promises; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How many promises do an average couple make in a day? Noiz never knew and was never interested in it. But what he was interested with - was how many promises Aoba made for him in a day.

How many times does a common couple make promises on a daily basis?

Aoba gave Noiz a lifetime promise when they were both stuck in the cramped room of Oval Tower – he said he’d show Noiz the world, but there were a lot of underlying promises under that big ‘world’ umbrella. Every day, at least one promise would be fulfilled; every minute, Noiz would make new promises for Aoba. But was Aoba sharing the same thought process as him? Was he taking promises as seriously as he did too?

There was only one way to find out.

Spontaneously, he woke up one morning with the same question he had before he headed to bed, thinking if there was any way to clear his qualms. Aoba was still soundly asleep when he woke up, the day still dimmed, the hour still early. He turned to his side, gave Aoba a momentary stare before he leaned in and kissed him on the lips, slowly, nipping on his bottom lip until Aoba budged, opening his eyes just to have Noiz’s eyes being the first thing he saw.

“Good morning.”

But, as expected, Aoba rolled back to sleep, pulling the blanket up to cover half of his face and leaving Noiz to stare endearingly at him all over again.

“Wake up, Aoba.” It was two hours later that he pulled Aoba up by the wrists, supporting him into a sitting position. Aoba was still sleeping, soft snores escaped from his lips as his head fell sideways.

“A bit more…”

“How long is a bit more?”

“Five minutes…”

“Five minutes?”

“En…”

“Promise?”

“En…”

 _One_.

It was fifteen minutes later that Aoba was dragged unceremoniously to the bathroom, where Noiz spread the toothpaste on his toothbrush for him and almost having to brush his teeth for him until Aoba woke up with a start, growling and pouting at him for the almost-indecent act he was about to do.

It was another half an hour later when he found Aoba already fully awake, an apron over him as he worked in the kitchen, humming melodies that Noiz was already more than familiar with.

“Morning,” he hugged him from the back, kissing him on the ear shell.

“Oh, you’re awake, and—hey.”

Noiz had enveloped him in the entire of his arms, nuzzling his cheek against Aoba’s as he started at the wok of items Aoba was cooking.

“Smells nice,” he said, nudging his chin on Aoba’s shoulder.

“It’s almost done,” Aoba smiled, shifting his attention back to the breakfast.

Noiz stayed the same, holding onto Aoba as he worked. It was a few struggled motions later that he sent a backward glare at Noiz.

“You know, I can’t cook very well if you keep holding me like this.”

“Do you need help?” Noiz asked instead.

“You, move away – that’s help.”

Noiz did as he was told, eyes still staring at the wok.

“Donuts,” he said.

“Yup, I promised you donuts for breakfast yesterday, right?”

How did he count a promise from a day before? Could he even count it in the first place?

 _Two_.

“C’mon, here you go.”

The donuts were as delicious as he remembered them to be. A few bites later and the dishes were cleaned, Aoba staring gleefully at him from across the table, urging him to stand up from his seat and lean his body towards him, pecking him softly on the lips.

“Sweet.”

“You little…”

He took two more seconds to savour the pouting feature of Aoba before he left his seat, putting on his coat and lifting his briefcase off the couch. When he was all prepared to leave, Aoba was already holding the door open for him, his smile almost had Noiz erasing all his intention to go to work for the day.

“I’ll be waiting,” Aoba said when Noiz kissed him on the forehead, then on the lips.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

 _Three_.

“Also—“

“Call you during lunch and text you when anything is to happen, am I right?”

Noiz smiled, giving Aoba a final deep kiss on the lips, he hugged him, then stepped out of the door, wanting the day to end already.

 _Four_. _Five_.

Was he doing it wrong? The day had just started and they were already making so many promises together. Was this how common couples behave too?

Or was it just them?

“Brother, is something bothering you?”

Theo waved a hand in front of him. He gave out a light cough, returning his gaze to the pile of document on his desk.

“Sorry,” he said, picking a pen up and was about to write something when the phone rang.

“Is it Aoba-san?” Theo asked, even though Noiz wasn’t sure if he was asking if that was the cause of him being distracted or if he was asking about the phone call.

He was right for both, anyway.

“I’ll leave first then,” Theo stood up from his seat, giving Noiz a smile before he left the office, leaving Noiz completely alone.

“Aoba?”

“Ah, sorry, am I disturbing?”

“Not at all,” a small smirk lifted from the corner of his lips as he leaned back against his chair, his work completely thrown out of his mind. “Where are you, by the way? It’s a bit noisy over there.”

“Oh, oh yeah!” Aoba exclaimed from the other side. “Wait a sec,” the voice distanced a bit before it came back to Noiz’s ear at full volume. “I wanted to ask what you want for dinner today.”

“Are you cooking?” Noiz’s smirk deepened. Every tone and every one of Aoba’s voice gave him a sense of comfort that he never knew he needed. He shot a quick look at the time on one of his opened hologram screens – 1:15 p.m.

He wanted it to be 6:00 p.m. already.

“Don’t think about eating out again.” He could see how Aoba’s pouting simply from his response.

“Not thinking about that, just curious,” Noiz retorted, frank.

“Well, yes, I’m cooking, do you have an opinion?”

“Of course not.” It was always amusing to tease Aoba, his reaction remained one of Noiz’s favourites. “What’s on your plate?”

“I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking you.”

“I wouldn’t mind anything you make, you know that.”

“ _That’s exactly why it’s a problem_ ,” Aoba was growling, but the blush on his face reached Noiz’s imagination loud and clear. “I don’t accept ‘anything’ as an answer. Now, speak up.”

“Hmmm,” Noiz pondered, fingers tapping on the table. “What’s that dish you like? Beef stew?”

“…ah,” Aoba paused, just for a brief moment. “That’s a bit hard but—“

“Hard? Then—“

“No, I’ll do it,” Aoba interrupted. Over the phone, Noiz heard him talking to Ren, then back to him again. “Beef stew it is then.”

“Promise?”

“Huh? Yeah, of course. Promise.”

“Okay then. See you tonight.”

 _Six_.

At 6:00 p.m., he dashed out of the office before anyone could stop him, took the fastest route home and reached his apartment in less than a mere half an hour. The moment he saw Aoba’s face at the door, he launched himself towards him, hugging him and burying his head in the crook of Aoba’s neck, smelling in the familiar scent of shampoo before he muttered,

“I’m home.”

“Welcome home. You’ve worked hard.” Aoba patted him on the head, without any intention to push him away.

As they parted, Noiz locked gaze on Aoba, a look of expectancy.

“Hmm?”

“The thing you promised,” he said, words simple yet straight to the point.

“Beef stew? It’s cooking.”

“Another.”

“Oh.”

He didn’t need to elaborate further. He _knew_ Aoba would get it. And sure enough, Aoba let out a bitter smile, tiptoed and cupped Noiz’s face in his hand as he kissed him, gently but passionately, on the lips.

“Welcome home.”

Could he count this as one too? Since it was something they did daily, he should, right?

 _Seven_.

Too flustered to spell another word under Noiz’s fixated, heated stare, Aoba pushed him to the couch in the living room, making him stay in place before he rushed back to the kitchen with Ren, giving Noiz a fair warning not to walk into the kitchen without his permission.

He’d been waiting for the entire day; another second of wait now was way too much for him. It felt like he’d been waiting for an eternity.

But he’d wait as long as he needed for Aoba anyway.

As promised, when he was summoned back to Aoba’s side, he was treated with beef stew for dinner – Aoba’s favourite – alongside an anxious-looking boyfriend as he scooped the meal into Noiz’s bowl for him.

“I hope it won’t taste too bad.”

“It won’t,” Noiz said almost instantly.

“How can you be so sure?”

“It has your taste, that’s all I need.”

He was sure Aoba was about to say something but he choose that precise moment to send a spoonful of the meal to his mouth, effectively forcing whatever remarks Aoba had down his throat.

“Nice,” he said, the nice scent of the warm food spread in his mouth.

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

He heard Aoba released a heavy sigh of relief. He really didn’t need to worry. Noiz would eat _anything_ Aoba was to prepare for him; having _someone_ to make dinner for him was even a guilty fortune of its own.

“Alright, you’re done here. Now go out while I clean the table.”

“Joining me for shower?” He stood, staring as Aoba gathered the plates, hearing a loud clanking sound of glass hitting glass before he found Aoba staring – or rather, glaring – at him.

“Did we make that promise?” he asked, a scowl forming in between his eyebrows.

“Not really. But we can make one now.”

 _Nine_.

“Ugh.”

“You don’t want to?”

“Not that…”

“I’ll wait for you then.”

Their discourse was nothing out of the ordinary, at least not for Noiz. He deemed it normal, something that he did naturally. He loved Aoba, and he wanted to tell him that in any ways possible. He knew Aoba loved him too, albeit the way he was portraying it was a bit… different from the way Noiz did it.

Needless to say, the shower turned into a heated interaction that none of them was surprised of. As they got out of it, not entirely dry but pretty much cleaned, Noiz carried Aoba bridal-style, dropping him on the bed as gently as he could before he hovered over him.

“I did well today,” he said, voice huskier than usual, eyes darkened with palpable want.

“Good job,” Aoba grinned brightly, ruffling Noiz on the head.

“Can I claim my reward?”

Aoba looked away almost instantly, telling Noiz enough that he’d captured his intention clear as day.

“W-well, I did promised you anyway…”

 _Ten_.

Was it normal for a pair of couple to promise each other so many things in just one single day? Or was it only them that was spoiling each other so much to the extent that words weren’t needed between them, that their chemistry alone was the best interaction they could share?

Noiz didn’t know, but it didn’t bother him regardless. He’d make as many promises with Aoba as he could. _He_ himself had made tons of mental promises with Aoba; some which Aoba knew, some which he didn’t. It was genuine curiosity that had led him to make an actual count on how many promises Aoba gave him in a day.

The result surprised him.

He protected every promises he was to give Aoba; even at the verge of coming, he waited, waited for Aoba to make the final squeal that he let himself loose, burying himself deep inside Aoba and pouring all his seeds into him. He promised Aoba to tell him when he felt good during sex, just so Aoba knew that he could properly feel warmth, feel how good it was to be so passionately turned on like this, feel _Aoba_. He knew Aoba needed the assurance, but at the same time, he knew _he_ needed that assurance too.

“Noiz…” Aoba whimpered, clutching hard onto Noiz’s shoulders as he forced the last of the words out of his tongue. “You promised…”

“I did, and I will.”

It was a lifelong promise they shared, one that was a bond formed between them and one that was an unspoken promise that both of them would cherish till the end of their life –

– that they will stay by each other’s side, regardless of ups and downs and regardless of who each other were.

Because they were who they were because of each other now; and they were sure that they were never be true to themselves, to each other, if not because of this very bond they shared.

 _That_ , was the one promise that Noiz never needed to count, for it came naturally, like it was part of his existence.


	84. Relive; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was as if their time was stopped at that one precise moment, as if they’d never moved away from who they truly were. One year after that incident, Noiz and Aoba found themselves being fascinated over the same thing all over again - some things never change, indeed.

Many days were observed, many actions memorized. There was nothing about Aoba that Noiz never knew. He’d captured the finest details of his entire existence ever since he first met him: first out of curiosity, now out of endearment. Everything that he couldn’t make sense of Aoba, he wanted to make sense of it; everything that he couldn’t understand of Aoba, he wanted to understand all of it. Aoba was his world, and he thought perhaps it was just fair to want to know more about his world.

Making love for the first time ever left him with many wonders. Warmth, for one, was the most conspicuous thing he’d come to recognize as being the most impactful thing he ever felt in his life. _Aoba_ ’s warmth, on the other hand, gave him sensations that he was sure was more than the common sensations a normal human being was used to feel.

It triggered a fiercer fire within him to challenge him again, like Aoba had promised him.

Their rematch was very much different from how it was when they first fought in Rhyme. They kept the same distance, giving each other stares that shouted of nothing but anticipation.

It was different, but it was the same at the same time, even nostalgic.

“I won’t go easy on you,” Noiz had said, which Aoba responded with an ecstatic smirk.

“Same here, brat.”

Their relationship had changed; Noiz, especially, had experienced change so radical it almost felt as if he was a different person altogether. But when they got into their fighting stance, both of them instantly knew that they were the same after all, despite whatever that had happened between them.

The challenge remained the same; Noiz’s motive remained the same: he wanted to defeat Aoba and tell him that he was still strong and still capable of surviving for himself. This match was a whole different implication to him. It wasn’t only about the winning, but it was about self-discovery; about how one person could come to turn over a new leaf when they found a world that belonged to them exclusively.

And sure enough, when he released his attacks towards Aoba, letting it backfire on him and giving him the second defeat, all that he had on his face was a smirk, as if he’d just achieved victory.

“Nice match. Are you okay?” Aoba rushed towards him, holding out a hand to support him up.

His hand was warm, Noiz had known about it ever since he first held him in his hand. It was almost addictive. He lost the match, but there was this sense of warmth right beneath his chest that had him lifting a genuine smile. He was contented, even though it was the second time he’d lost to the not-quite-same person he used to know.

Probably he was meant to miss the mark after all; probably he was never meant to win Aoba.

“You okay?” Aoba asked, a face of concerned.

“Yeah.”

“Phew. Does it hurt? Anywhere at all?”

“Not at all.”

They ended up shaking each other’s hands, sitting down on the Rhyme field as they leaned their weight against each other, relieving a soft sigh all in one time.

“It’s finally done, huh?” Aoba said, smile gracing his features as he stared at the hologram space.

“Yeah.”

It was finally done – their rematch; the one and only goal Noiz had lodged on Aoba, despite the intention changing as with the one he had in the beginning.

“How was it?”

“Good,” he said, completely frank.

“That’s good.”

But this match meant more than just another match to him. It was a closure: one that he needed to do before he treaded a new stride.

“It needs to be remembered,” Aoba mumbled by his side, speaking his thoughts out.

“What needs to be remembered?”

“This match. Today,” Aoba threw an upbeat smile at Noiz’s direction, further confusing Noiz.

“Why?”

“It’s your graduation day!”

What?

The next thing he knew, Aoba was ruffling his hair, still with the cheeky grin on his face before he said again, “You’re no longer a brat. You graduated from being a brat!”

Truth was, he knew that Aoba would see him as a brat as long as he lived; the first impression would never change so easily.

“Happy graduation!”

“You mean ‘Happy Anniversary’.”

“Whichever works.”

Yeah, he graduated as a brat. Aoba was right. And the next step he did further convinced Aoba that he had, indeed, graduated from the immature shell he once enclosed around himself.

* * *

“Ah.” Aoba released a small voice, halfway through fumbling a closet. It had been a year since they had moved to Germany – everything was well; some things were least expected than the other but at the end of the day, they fell into the right pieces, all too naturally, all too perfectly.

“What’s wrong, Aoba?” Ren looked up at Aoba, attempting to catch a glimpse of what that had captured Aoba’s attention when Aoba returned his stare, beaming.

“I almost forgot.”

Forgot about what, Ren had absolutely no idea of. The next thing he knew, Aoba was holding a bag out of a box in the closet, dashing his way towards the bathroom, the sound of water running immediately filled the space.

A sign of off-limit, Ren remained standing outside of the door, peeking into what Aoba was doing before he throttled away, joining Midori as he allowed the other to jump onto his back.

“I’m home.”

“Noiz! Noiz! Welcome home!”

“Welcome home, Noiz.”

“Yeah, where’s Aoba?”

“Aoba is—“

“Ah, welcome home!”

Aoba was peering his head out of the bedroom a few hours after he was done with his suspicious business as he stared at Noiz from afar with Noiz returning his gaze with a curious lift of eyebrow.

“What are you planning this time again, huh?” Noiz said, mirroring Aoba’s wayward expression with crossed arms.

“Come here,” Aoba waved a hand, still hiding behind the door.

“Aren’t you coming over to give me a welcome home kiss first?” Noiz smirked profounder, despite already taking one step towards Aoba.

“How about we change a game plan then?” Aoba said. “C’mon, I’ve got something to show you.”

Whenever Aoba was to act all secretive like this, all Noiz felt was the fire of an ignited want. He didn’t need Aoba to tell him twice, his legs driven by raw instinct of curiosity. And the moment he stepped into the room, Aoba pulled him right into it, closing the door behind them and – almost – slammed him against the door.

“Heh, what are you trying to do, huh?” His voice dropped one octave lower, hands snaking towards Aoba’s waist to hold him close. Aoba though, had both of his hands pressing against Noiz’s shoulders, his gaze everywhere but on Noiz’s face as he took in every detail of Noiz’s body, leaning closer where needed.

“What are you doing?” Noiz asked at long last, realizing that Aoba wasn’t sharing the same intention as he did.

“You’ve grown a bit since last year,” Aoba said, drawing himself back, just enough for him to make out the whole of Noiz’s body.

“I’m still growing after all,” Noiz said, indifferent, having absolutely no idea of what Aoba was intending to do.

“You probably couldn’t fit into _that_ then…”

“Fit into _what_?”

Pulling another playful smile at Noiz, Aoba struggled out of his embrace, strode towards the bed and lifted what looked like a pair of freshly cleaned shirt for Noiz to see.

“Remember?”

“Ah,” Noiz was surprised for just a fleeting moment. But then, his eyes lowered, lips curved into a tender smile. “Of course.”

“Want to try it on again?”

“Now?”

“Do you remember what day is today?”

He _knew_ Aoba had something up on his sleeve – and this was it. He searched his memory bank, pondered at the possibility of forgetting something, exasperated at the fact that he _did_ forgotten about something when Aoba hushed him, pushing the shirt right towards his chest.

“It’s your graduation day.”

Oh. His memory gradually returning to him, his eyes revivified, the scenes of what the mere date implied flashing in front of him like a film reel. It had been _that_ long, huh?

“Anniversary, you mean.”

“Whichever works.”

Aoba’s delighted smile was nothing different from how it was when they first shared the same dialogue. When he held the pair of shirt in his hands, he could somehow feel an uncanny tinge of warmth running from his palms, coursing through his skin and hitting him right in the chest. It had been that long – one year, _exactly_ one year. It had been one year of him no longer chasing after Aoba’s heels but walking side-by-side with him. It had been a full whole year of him living a real life with Aoba, exploring new things, doing things with Aoba, to Aoba, and having Aoba to return his courtesy as well.

It had been _one_ year since his graduation – and today was the anniversary of that very date that’d broke him out of his manacled self, eventually pushing him towards making a decision that’d landed them at where they were now.

“Go on,” Aoba rushed him, turning him around and pushing his back towards the bathroom. “I can’t wait to see.”

Aoba seemed way more enthusiastic than he was. He missed those days, he couldn’t lie to himself; the ecstasy of playing Rhyme still very much palpable within him. Hence, when he pulled the clothes over himself, he was instantly struck by a sudden wave of melancholy, scenes after scenes of the past playing in his head like a mantra, reminding him of how he once was, and how he was _now_.

He didn’t know one year could make such a huge difference.

When he looked at his own reflection in the mirror once he was done with dressing himself up in the old yet new attire, he found himself fascinated at his own outlook. He remembered this very man – this was the same man who was so very obsessed with Rhyme and also the same man who was once so reckless the outlook he embraced now in Germany almost felt like a phantasm.

The only things that were missing was perhaps his piercings; and in that instance, he wanted so very much to grasp the box of piercings he’d kept in his bedside drawer and put them back on, just to complete the set.

But that could wait – maybe next time.

He couldn’t quite believe it when he placed a hand on the doorknob, about to open the door. It felt different for some peculiar reason. Dressing himself back in this attire made him feel as if he was back in time. What would Aoba say to him? Would he see him in a different way? Or would he see him the same as how he always did regardless if he was the brat in Midorijima or the young businessman in Germany?

There’s only one way to find out.

He took a deep breath, pulled the door open, and was immediately greeted by a bright-smiling Aoba, whose eyes brightened in exhilaration the moment he caught his very first sight of Noiz.

“W-wow,” he breathed, visibly astonished. “You… just…. _Wow_.”

“Does it look weird?”

“It still fits… and of course it doesn’t look weird, what are you talking about?”

Aoba walked towards Noiz, staring at his outfit as he paced around him in a circle.

“I…” he said, but stopped. When Noiz turned around to meet his gaze, he immediately looked away, a thin flush appearing on his face for reasons unknown.

“What is it?”

“Nothing,” Aoba said hurriedly. “Just reminded of how much you have grown. That’s really impressive, really.”

So that was where the blushes came from. Smirking, Noiz closed his distance, slanting down just to put his hand behind Aoba’s knees and nonchalantly scooped him up into his arms, carrying him bridal-style to his bed.

“H-hey, what are you doing?!”

“You’re acting so cute I couldn’t resist,” he said, tone husky. “What is it? Falling in love with me again?”

“Shut up, I’m just surprised!”

“Surprised of? It’s not like you haven’t seen me in this before anyway.”

“W-well…” Aoba was _still_ averting his eyes. “It’s like ‘ah… you’ve really grown up now’ that kind of feeling?”

“It’s only one year,” Noiz countered, pressing their chests together as he trailed Aoba’s cheekbone with one finger, ultimately twirling on his hair and lifting the tips up to kiss on them.

“One year can make a lot of difference,” Aoba chuckled. “It turned you into a… well, man.”

He couldn’t quite understand what Aoba meant, to be honest. But he decided to let it go. Aoba was too cute, he couldn’t resist but to tease him more.

“I’ve graduated from a brat after all. Today is the one year anniversary of that, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, but,” finally looking him in the eyes, Aoba cupped his face, bumping their noses together. “You’ll _always_ be my brat, though.”

It did things to him, the skip of a heartbeat Noiz felt beneath his chest had confirmed it.

“Of course,” he chortled softly. “Big Brother.”

He was sure that Aoba was about to hit him in the head if he hadn’t been pressing their lips together quick enough, engulfing Aoba into a passionate kiss that he’d yearned for the entire day.

“Claiming my welcome home kiss,” he said with a lick on his tongue.

“Welcome home, Noiz,” Aoba mumbled against his lips, arms encircled around Noiz’s neck.

“You’ve said it already,” Noiz whispered, feeling the softness of their lips brushing against each other, their breath hot on each other’s faces.

“Welcome home.” But all Aoba did was repeating the same phrase again; it was then that it struck Noiz to what he _really_ meant as he let out a genuine smile, wrapping his whole body around Aoba’s body and capturing him into yet another breath-taking kiss.

Even when he’d moved on from whoever he was a year back and even when he’d decided to take a hasty turn in his life with Aoba, Aoba would never see him any way different from how he used to.

Regardless of how much he was to change, physically or mentally, he’d never be able to change who he _really_ was – the brat that Aoba had tirelessly picked up when the whole world couldn’t care less about him. This appearance he was wearing now was not a past, but a reminder; and it was never a bad thing, it would never be a bad thing.

Probably if he was to wear this very same outfit again ten years down the road, twenty years even, they’d feel the same again – as if time had stopped at the moment when they first met and they’d return to square one regardless of how far they’d wander after that.

The more their tongues tangled, the more they missed the sound of metal hitting on teeth when Noiz still had his piercings on his tongue. Next time if they were to do this again, Noiz made a silent vow to himself that he’d put his piercings on again, just so they could relive the time that they would come to define as their very own anniversary.

Welcome home, indeed.


	85. Summer Memory [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second time they returned to this place, Aoba noticed how much Noiz had grown as a person – more than just a physical sense.

The night sky was tinted in deep layers of juniper-purple. Darkness was dawning but yet the sound of crickets chirping filled the air, gentle wind darting through the surrounding motion like an alluring lullaby. It was a peaceful, yet solitary summer atmosphere they hadn’t been experiencing since months ago, and now, the scorching season hit them heatedly in daylight, yet sneaking up to them in such accordance footsteps when night-time settled in.

When he came out of the shower, Noiz was already nowhere to be seen. He remembered him sitting against the wall when he walked out of the living room, after he’d mindfully rejected Noiz’s idea of venturing into the public, open-aired _onsen_ located just a few steps away from their room. They’d decided to return to this very place since their last visit two years ago, and finding themselves reminiscing the first summer they spent together, now the third.

He looked around, assuming that Noiz had decided to bring himself to the opened bath without him, until he spotted a shadow of what seemed to be a person sitting on the compound, outside of the living room that he lifted a dainty smile.

With the very limited light source he had, he could only make out Noiz’s silhouette from where he was standing – he seemed like he was gazing into space; moonlight shone on his face, his blond-coloured hair appearing all the more striking enveloped in the dull, dark surrounding, his olive-coloured _kimono_ – handpicked by Aoba – a perfect complement to his natural features. He seemed to be in his own thoughts, possibly unaware of Aoba’s presence.

Heaving a sigh under his breath, Aoba scooped a _haori_ from the closet, moving as quietly as he could as he inched careful paces towards where Noiz was sitting.

Summer breeze hit him instantly; it was so quiet that his breathing even sounded too loud for his own liking.

Noiz never looked up when he stood behind him, until when Aoba draped the _haori_ over his _kimono_ that he jolted out of reflex, then relaxing his expression when he realized who had approached him.

“You’ll catch a cold if you sit here for too long,” Aoba grinned, joining him to sit by his side.

Noiz merely elevated a smile. He closed his eyes, fleetingly coddling in the comfortable silence between them, giving Aoba a chance to sneak a good peek at him.

The _haori_ adorned perfectly over his _kimono_ , his exposed chest gave sight to coarse skin across well-build body shape and refined muscles. The clothing was loose enough for Aoba to make out the entire of his torso, and while he still had his eyes closed, he looked indisputably calm, long eyelashes fluttering ever so slightly as the wind blew, his already dishevelled hair even more so with strands of it standing on the ends.

When he opened his eyes, catching Aoba’s at the right moment, Aoba looked away instantaneously, feeling the tips of his ears burn.

He’d already known how good-looking his fiancé was. Two years ago, when they were here, at the same place, he’d caught sight of Noiz’s distinctive features as he tampered with the fireworks. He’d witnessed how this very person portrayed the rawest expressions of curiosity, of interest, of tease, of arousal, and of course, of dismissiveness, the starting point of Aoba’s impression. And now, two years later, he found himself still ogling at him, still hard to believe that he’d ended up with a person whom he once referred to as an immature brat, and whom had eventually turned into one of the most courageous and most intelligent man he’d come to know.

“What is it? Falling for me again?” Noiz’s familiar smirk had returned to his features, drawing an instinctive pout out of Aoba.

He was wrong – he’s _still_ a brat after all. Anything else he was to say would only become materials for more teasing so he decided to keep his mouth shut, just to feel Noiz creeping closer towards him.

“This is too loose.” He fiddled with Aoba’s kimono, pulling on its edge, attempting to cover up the naked torso Aoba was baring.

“It doesn’t matter, there’s no one else here besides us,” Aoba pushed him away. He was almost grateful that it was shady now so Noiz wouldn’t be able to see how possibly flustered his cheeks were.

Noiz frowned. Pulling him over by his waist, he allowed Aoba to fall against him, pressing his head against his shoulder without another word.

He wanted to tease him, he really did. It was this very _adorable_ part of his that Aoba would never ever come to get over with. But he was decoyed into the comfort zone that was Noiz’s embrace when Noiz placed a hand around his head, his free hand reaching out to intertwine their fingers together.

“Let’s stay like this for a while,” was all Noiz said before Aoba nodded, joining him to gaze at the moon.

Their rings glimmered faintly under the moonlight, their fingers fitting perfectly with each other’s hands. The breeze became a pacifying form of contentment for them as they pandered in each other’s warmth, recollecting on yet another memory of summer they shared with each other, and will be sharing with each other for many years to come.


	86. Heat Stroke [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aoba has a talent – the talent to seduce a nineteen-year-old man even without he himself knowing.

He has been staring for a bit too long. Noiz must have noticed it as well, otherwise he wouldn’t be flashing him suggestive stare from the moment he stepped into the bathroom, naked from head to toe, to when he sat in the bathtub, trying hard to ignore Noiz’s hinting gaze.

“What?” he asked at long last, shooting a pointed glare at Noiz’s direction.

Noiz sat on the edge of the bathtub, saying nothing but merely staring in such a penetrating way at Aoba that it was starting to make him feel very uncomfortable.

“Could it be that you’re seducing me?” Noiz said with a smirk on his lips, sneaking his hand towards Aoba and stopping right by his shoulder.

Aoba frowned. “Only _you_ would take it this way.”

“No? How disappointing,” Noiz smirked higher. It was the way Aoba had his hair up in a bun, droplets of water fell from the tips of his stranded hair, his skin sprinkled with thin sheen of clear water from the bath, and also the way tint of pink creating a faint temptation that was triggering an urgent want in Noiz to press his hand against his skin and feel that very warmth on his own.

“I’m trying to shower here,” Aoba pouted, wiping foam all over his body, eyes still glaring at Noiz’s direction.

The next thing he knew, Noiz had joined him in the bathtub, water overflowed and damping the entire of the bathroom’s floor.

“Oi! What are you—ah.”

He could _never_ keep up with Noiz’s pace. He’d caught sight of Noiz’s half-hard erection right before it sank below the water level, foam covering the aroused scene of it before Noiz captivated his attention back with a palm on his face.

“Seems like someone is more interested in _something else_ than my face.”

“You—“ The steam in the room was clouding his head, his face heating up, giving him a light migraine. He was no longer sure if the heat was stemmed from within him or it was thanks to the building warmth in the bathroom; but he was _sure_ that the suggestive stare Noiz was giving him now was definitely leading things into a different direction.

But Noiz was right in front of him now, peering at him with a gaze that spelt of naked yearning. He was wet from head to toe as well, beads of water trickled down his skin, dripping into the water, and the palm on his face only became deliberately sweltering with every passing second.

He closed his eyes on reflex when Noiz inched his face nearer, immediately feeling his soft lips against his as silent moans slipped from between their lips. Feeling his body sinking lower into the water, he clutched instinctively on Noiz’s shoulders, guiding Noiz to support his torso as both of their bodies drenched in the lukewarm water.

“Hah… Noiz…” he lamented, eyes damped and lips pouty from the hasty rush of intensity.

All Noiz did was elevating a smirk, then planting dainty kisses all over his cheeks, ultimately burying his head in the crook of Aoba’s neck and sniffing in the pleasant scent of Aoba.

“Do you have any idea how alluring a sight you’re making now?” Noiz whispered under his breath. Licking a small stream of water along Aoba’s collarbone, he sucked sporadically on Aoba’s fair skin, panting a contented breath against Aoba’s skin upon noticing the conspicuous kiss mark he left on his skin.

Their dicks pressed against each other, the slippery of foam in the water only lessening the friction between their two stimulations. Aoba wanted so much to touch it; his arousal going out of control. But Noiz gripped his hand before he could do exactly that, pressing his wrist against the cold material of the bathtub before he proceeded to kiss his neck.

“Someone’s impatient,” he breathed, eliciting a low grunt out of Aoba.

“Noiz, please…” Aoba urged. His lower half was _aching_ , his dick raising its head as he moved his hips out of desperation, rubbing it against Noiz’s own erected dick and prodding on his sensitive spots with Noiz’s piercings.

“And who was the one who said he wasn’t seducing me, huh?” Noiz said, eyes darkened with profound lust.

The bathtub was too small for them; there was barely any space for them to move, Aoba’s action trapped in Noiz’s arms but he’d given up any effort to struggle, submitting his entire body to Noiz. He was so entranced in Noiz’s tantalized touches that when Noiz finally rubbed their dicks together with his hand, grinding them the way both of them loved it, he moaned out loud, completely discarding his esteem aside.

“Harder,” he yelped.

“Like this?”

Noiz would do _anything_ Aoba asked for; his priority undaunted. And it was especially when Aoba was absorbed in this very bliss Noiz was giving him now that had pushed Noiz gratification into a whole new level.

He loved how resolute Aoba could be at times; his pride unshaken. But he also loved how wanton Aoba could be, especially when _he_ was the one who could draw that sleeping nature out of him.

“Y-yes…!” Aoba gasped, almost cumming when Noiz slipped a teasing nail along the head of his dick.

Clicking his tongue, Noiz wiped water off his face, snaking his hand into the water and right to where Aoba’s hole was.

He flipped an ephemeral glance at Aoba’s direction, heeding how Aoba was breathing open-mouthed with his eyes closed, thick flush engrossed his features, before he slithered a finger right into him.

“Ahhh…!” Aoba cried out loud, back arching and hand grasping hard on the edge of the bathtub.

“Sorry, does it hurt?” Noiz muttered under his breath, his finger stilled inside of Aoba.

“N-no…” Aoba panted. “Feels good…”

There was honestly no better seduction than the one Aoba gave him, impulsively or not. Provoked, Noiz pumped harder on his dick, his finger slipping in and out of Aoba in a greater pace that had Aoba gritting his teeth to suppress his moans.

“This is great,” Noiz huffed. “The water is making it easy for me to move. You’re so…” he took a breath, leaning towards Aoba’s neck again and kissing his pale skin fervidly. “…so slippery and warm inside.”

“Noiz… hurry,” Aoba pleaded. “I want you.”

Noiz adhered to his request without hesitation; he always did. Pulling three fingers out, he pulled himself up, ushering Aoba to turn his back towards him so that his ass was veered towards him.  
“Hold tight,” he whispered, planting small kisses along Aoba’s back before he pushed himself into Aoba, instantly earning himself a low moan.

“Incredible,” he commented. “It slips right to the hilt just with one thrust.”

“S-shut up,” Aoba threw an agitated glare over his shoulder. “Hurry up and—ah, do it.”

They no longer knew if the water on their bodies were sweat or bathwater, both mingling on their flustered skin. Noiz slammed himself into Aoba over and over again, pointed thrusts constantly hanging Aoba on the edge of his orgasm as Aoba shrieked, the slippery sensation of Noiz sliding himself in and out of him in such an effortless way wiping white all over his mind.

Their moans echoed loudly around the space, steam forming building around them, only intensifying the heat on both their bodies and their minds. Aoba dick sprung with every acute thrust; and every motion nudged him steadily towards the peak. Noiz’s dick felt so startlingly good in him; his piercings scraped him on the right spots, the tip of his dick hitting him deep in the hilt. He could think of nothing but a strong urge to submit his body to this very person, allowing him to destroy him, distracting everything off his mind, and he wanted nothing but to submerge himself in this very addicting sensation for as long as he could.

“N-Noiz…” His words were out of order, everything he could make out was Noiz’s name. Then, he heard a low growl, Noiz’s grip tightened on his waist when he came to a stop in Aoba, coming just on the same time as Aoba.

They took a few moments adjusting to their breathing before they sank back into the water. It was no longer warm but just so slightly cold, thin sheen of white liquid floating on the water, causing Aoba to wince when he caught sight of it.

“ _Now_ I need to clean the bathtub,” he complained.

“We’ll do it together,” Noiz chuckled, twirling a finger around the semen on the water.

“Ew, don’t play with that,” Aoba frowned, which only resulted in a smile from Noiz.

“C’mon, we’ll get a heat stroke if we don’t get out soon,” he urged, standing up and helping Aoba up at the same time.

Noiz was wrong – they won’t get a heat stroke if they didn’t get out soon.

Because he was sure that Noiz was more than capable to give him a heat stroke regardless of if they were in a bathroom or not.


	87. Early Support [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s one job only Aoba can do.

Seeing Noiz pushing himself over his limit was always something Aoba was strongly against. He understood the length of things that Noiz needed to catch up while he returned to Germany. Fixing things was never easy, especially when it was something to do with misunderstandings and clash of beliefs. But Noiz had taken the step to make a change, to improve things, and honestly, that was something Aoba was extremely proud of him. 

Despite what Aoba had told him about trying as best as he could to keep his own health in check, he’d also taken up the responsibility to look after him – blind spots that Noiz might not have noticed it himself. 

This man had just started to learn how to live. Properly. The weight on Aoba’s shoulders was definitely more than just casual responsibilities. 

“Again?” Aoba sighed, frowning as he stared at Noiz’s blinking name on his Coil screen. He took a quick look at the dining table. Seems like he’d need to keep dinner for tomorrow then.

“What time would you be coming home?” he asked, trying not to sound too unamused. Noiz already had enough weight on his shoulders, Aoba definitely did not want to be part of it.

“Past midnight. Maybe,” Noiz said meekly. Aoba could hear the sound of papers flipping from the other end of the call. Figuring that Noiz was probably trying his best might to finish up all his task, he smiled, making sure that Noiz could sense it, before he responded,

“Focus on your work, alright? And don’t worry about me. I’ll keep the door locked.”

“And–”

“Yes, no need to wait for you. I’ll head to sleep first.”

He _really_  didn’t need to worry too much of him. Aoba was an adult, and despite how unfamiliar he was with this place, he was versatile enough to adapt himself into this environment in no time.

Hanging the call, he walked into the dining hall, with Ren throttling by his side, and started cleaning the table up.

“Aoba, are you going to wait for Noiz?” Ren asked, his gaze spelled of nothing but mild concern.

“I said it, I won’t be waiting for him,” Aoba said casually as he kept away the food. “Besides, I’d know when he’s back anyway.”

Which he was right. Even in the midst of drowsiness, his conscious half-awake, he could still feel the soft sensation on his cheek after he’d crawled himself to bed and right into the comfort of his own blanket when he was done with chores and studying.

He still felt the vague, tingling sensation when he woke up the next morning, wondering if he was dreaming when he felt it.

But as he walked out of the room, catching sight of the room next to his, he lifted an instinctive smile, knowing that there was _no way_  he’d been imagining things.

The smell of coffee woke him up in an instant as he slumped against the counter, still drowsy. It was still early anyway, and judging by how late Noiz had returned the previous night, it seemed that he won’t be awake anytime soon either.

“Ren,” he called out, cheek pressed against the table.

“What is it, Aoba?” Ren asked, jumping onto the counter and pressing a soft paw against Aoba’s face.

“Let’s go out for some fresh air? I’m feeling under the weather.”

“Did you catch a cold?” Ren asked again.

Aoba shook his head. “Maybe I’m just overly worried.”

And after a quick wash-up and changing, they walked out of the door, making sure to lock it before the both of them strolled their way towards the nearby park, where they witnessed families and individuals who’d gotten themselves an early wake joining them in their morning walk.

When Aoba returned near noon, Noiz’s room was still closed, with no visible evidence of him being awake. He stared at the closed door for another few moments before he walked towards his own room, pulling his scarf off as he walked and was about to head out when he heard sounds resounding from the next door, walking out just to be greeted by a bleary-eyed Noiz with bed hair standing at all ends.

He chuckled. “Good morning.”

Noiz took a few seconds to register who had just greeted him. It was one of the very rare sights that often drew endearing chortles out of Aoba. When he first knew Noiz, he’d never ever expected him to act like this. When Noiz just woke up, he was an entire flesh of instinct. Sometimes, when Aoba was within vicinity, he’d find himself being enveloped into a firm hug that had him catching his breath. If not, like now, he’d find Noiz staring dazedly at him, as if trying to figure out who Aoba was before he’d stroll magnetically towards him and lean against him.

Like now.

“Hey, big boy,” Aoba grinned as he patted the head of the man who was leaning against him. “Did you have a good night sleep?”

Noiz let out what sounded like a grumble before he pushed their distance apart, just to kiss Aoba on the lips.

“Good morning,” he muttered. 

Seeing Noiz having to push himself through his limits was always something Aoba was strongly against. But if Noiz had no chance but to do so, he’d make sure that he’d always be by Noiz’s side, supporting him while he could, and to give him the warmth he needed.

As much as he could.


	88. Insatiable [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Insatiable know no limits, perhaps one that’s each other.

Seven days.

_Seven days._

He’d usually reprimand Noiz when Noiz told him that three days without feeling Aoba was too much for him, acknowledging the perverted brat in him and wondering how did Noiz catch up with his libido then wondering if he was growing too old for the brat.

But now, as he lay in his bed, staring at the countdown clock on his Coil, he suddenly understood – _fully_ – of what Noiz had implied when it was _not enough_ when it came to Aoba.

Noiz had been out for a business trip for the past week, having to discuss and conduct site monitoring in a new piece of land his company wanted to expand. And while he expressed the intention for Aoba to follow him, Aoba had gracefully rejected the offer, telling him that it might be a great opportunity for him to explore more things by himself without the distraction from Noiz.

It resulted in a quiet sulk from Noiz later but above all, it resulted in profound regret and insatiable build-up lust in his lower half that had him cursing himself for the senseless decision he’d made.

Two more days and Noiz would be back, was what he’d been unceasingly telling himself all this while. He tried not to think too much about it, believing that everything was just his mind playing tricks on him. But the mind was a powerful tool, even more so now that his mind was clouded with lust so intense that he simply just… _couldn’t_ ignore the tension building at the bottom of his pit.

He released a loud sigh, closing his eyes and attempting to soothe the heat, but to no avail. Quietly, he pulled his pants off, leaving only his boxer on, making sure that Ren was in sleep mode and held his dick in his hand.

His length was already hard and leaking when he did as much as rubbing it. He’d come to understand how a man had his needs but he didn’t remember himself being _this_ insatiable and all he could do now was to curse at how he’d succumbed to Noiz’s request every time Noiz was to give him a suggestive stare, being dragged willingly into the flow and causing him to drown in such a mess now.

He wouldn’t have expected a day to come where he _couldn’t_ control his own lust.

Biting on his lower lip, he started pumping his dick, languidly at first, then picking up speed. Sweat bead at on his skin, his back damped, thin sheen of water coated the fair texture of his skin. He felt heat pooling on his cheeks the more he rubbed his dick, his heartbeats increased with every passing second but it was _not enough_.

He imagined Noiz’s hands on his body, one hand on his dick where he was feverishly pumping and another on his nipple, twirling the sensitive bud. His seductive voice rang in his ear, giving him intense goosebumps – “ _You like it when I do this to you, right?_ ”, “ _You’re becoming harder, and I was just starting._ ” – while he drowned into the imaginary presence of his boyfriend.

It worked, but just for a while. He had Noiz’s skin texture and voice memorized, knowing them like the back of his hand. It wouldn’t feel the same touching himself if it wasn’t _Noiz’s hand_ that was touching him. He cried out of frustration when he rubbed his thumb against his slit, just to find out that there was no way he could come unless he was to attempt something far more extreme.

With that thought, he opened a teary eye, taking his hand off his dick just to stretch and retrieve the bottle of lube on his bedside table.

The lube felt cold against his hole. He pushed a finger in, experimentally, feeling the coldness of the liquid melting into the warmth of his insides. He thrust his finger in, deeper with every thrust, then adding a second digit that had him almost passing out. He was already extremely desperate at this point. He wanted to come so bad that he was losing his patience. The motion he was inputting on his length was as ferocious as the thrusts he was pushing in and out of his hole. All that was in his mind was Noiz; Noiz thrusting into him, Noiz fiddling with his dick, and Noiz muttering dirty talks into his ear.

“Noiz… ah… Noiz…” His words were inconsistent, scattering into thin air. Alongside the imaginary voices in his head, he heard vulgar, sloppy sound of liquid that was the sound of his pre-cum wetting his hand as his pumped on it, effortlessly, with zero friction.

He wanted to come, he was about to come, he wanted it _so bad_ …

…and he was so engulfed in the whole sensation that he barely noticed that the very person he’d imagined in his head for the past fifteen minutes was standing by the foot of his bed, an amused grin gracing his features as he watched his lover struggling for release and calling his name while he did.

It took a few seconds before Aoba finally realized an extra presence in the room. Almost jumping up, he was two seconds too late when Noiz lurched towards him, stopping him by just putting his hand against Aoba’s hand on his dick.

“Heh, I see someone is impatient.” The very same voice he’d been imagining was _really_ ringing in his ear now, catching him in mild embarrassment. “What happened to giving a break to ourselves, I wonder?”

He didn’t even have the strength to summon a retort. All that he could do was looking Noiz in the eyes, with expression that spelled powerfully of profound want before he leaned and kissed Noiz deeply on the lips, a gesture Noiz hadn’t been expecting.

“Noiz…”

“I know,” Noiz said, impatience evident in his tone. He took his suit off, inelegantly setting it by their side and unbuckled his belt, then pulling his fully hard dick out, which had Aoba gasping in surprise.

“This is what looking at you masturbating does to me,” Noiz teased with a smirk. He positioned his dick against Aoba’s hole, licking his lips as he did, and before any of them could say anything, he pushed it right into him, hitting him in the hilt with one punctuated thrust.

“Ah…!” Nothing, _absolutely nothing_ , could beat the real thing. He could physically feel every one of Noiz’s piercings in him, pressing against his inner tunnel, as he took deep breath to refill the air into his lungs. He released a few strangled moans, hands grasping onto Noiz’s shoulders as his boyfriend pushed in and out of him, with motion so aggressive he could hardly keep up.

“Say…” Noiz said between pants. He was drenched in sweat now, his face flustered from the heat, but his eyes were filled with dark lust when he looked at Aoba, only arousing Aoba more. “How many times have you touched yourself when I’m away?”

He couldn’t even tell.

“Three times?” Noiz asked, hitting Aoba deep again.

Aoba shook his head. It’s definitely more than that.

“Five?” Noiz asked again, thrusting.

“S-six…”

“…heh…”

He didn’t say anything else after that, merely concentrating on pleasuring himself and pleasuring Aoba all at the same time.

Aoba must have given him the biggest arousal he could have with the answer he’d given him. And when both of them achieved climax, he felt as if he could’ve passed out… if Noiz didn’t pull himself out, just to turn Aoba over so that his ass was facing him in the air.

“W-wait, Noiz?!” Aoba shrieked, looking over his shoulder just to see Noiz pulling his tie free.

“Do you think once is enough? I have seven days worth of lust to satiate.”

Aoba had nothing against it, really; for he was the same too.

The only problem was – would they have time to call for food delivery now before they ended up skipping dinner?


	89. Tiny Gestures [Koujaku x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tiny gestures are what makes the best meaning out of everything they do.

Koujaku’s wellbeing had _always_ been Aoba’s main concern. Koujaku had been a perfect player in this range, Aoba had come to notice. The various occurrences when he would casually call Aoba up just to make sure that he’s fine had always been a powerful hint of concern that always had Aoba frowning at him and telling him off for being overly anxious. Koujaku didn’t seem like he could help it, though. And across time, Aoba sort of realized that it was just how Koujaku was – being overly concerned, and overly anxious over anything that’s got to do with him.

He was in his shop, minding his own business when Koujaku walked in one fine day. It was casual, as usual as he always was, and all Aoba could do was waving a hand at his direction and then continuing with his own matter, as if Koujaku was non-existent in the space.

Koujaku was used to it anyway. His usual barging in often resulted with him sitting around and speaking casually with Aoba and whenever Aoba was to question him about his work, he’d say that he’d taken a day off and that he was now roaming around freely just to check out on matters in the street.

There was always something unnatural about the way Koujaku said it though. And Aoba didn’t want to ponder on the awkward possibility of him actually taking time off to visit him.

He’d usually hang out for a good half an hour before he made his departure, in which Aoba would send him off then reminding him about dropping by for dinner later before he returned to his work matters.

It was the usual routine; something Aoba could do without batting an eye. But today, however, as he watched Koujaku’s body disappearing down the street, his shadow indistinct in a far distance, he looked up, scowling at the gathering dark clouds.

“Hey, Ren,” he called out, eyes still fixed at the sky.

“What is it, Aoba?” Ren asked, standing right by Aoba’s leg.

“Do you remember if Koujaku had an umbrella with him?”

Ren paused for a few moments, attempting to gather his memory.

“I didn’t see any when he walked in just now.”

“…right…?” Aoba mumbled, his scowl deepened.

There was no point for him to be overly anxious, really. Koujaku could take care of himself. Raindrops won’t kill him. Of course it won’t.

He returned to the shop, shaking his head while he did to get rid of those unnecessary overthinking and slumped on the counter. While he was about to manage the sales data for that day, thunderstorm echoed from a distance, freezing every one of his motion.

“D-did you hear that?” he asked Ren, who was seated on a chair just right beside the counter.

“The thunderstorm?”

“Yeah…” Aoba trailed off, attention captured by the window. It had started to rain now, window glass vibrated with the splattering of rain.

“Don’t worry, Aoba. You could stay indoors until the rain has subsided.”

He didn’t need to worry, he really didn’t need to. Koujaku was an _adult_ , he knew how to take care of himself. He might be taking shelter under one of the shops now, or maybe he had gone home, for all Aoba knew.

He pulled his Coil up, was about to send Koujaku a message before he clicked his tongue, grabbed one of the umbrellas from the stand and hurried out of the shop, with Ren throttling anxiously behind him.

He could’ve left Koujaku alone, in all honesty. But he was reminded of the countless times when Koujaku would turn up for his back whenever he was in trouble and he simply couldn’t allow himself to ignore it when he obviously noticed how Koujaku _might_ be facing trouble himself now. The guilt was strong within him, the frustration equally so. And while he dashed down the roads, with umbrella high above his head, he looked around, impatiently looking out for a familiar hint of red but to no avail.

His nerves were _really_ getting to him now.

“Ah, Aoba-san!”

He turned sharply, just to be greeted by a wide grin from Kou.

“Kou!” he called out.

“What are you doing here, Aoba-san?” Kou asked. He had his own umbrella held high, and it seemed like he was in the midst of errands as well.

“Did you happen to see Koujaku?” Aoba asked, without wasting more time.

“Koujaku-san?” Kou repeated with wide eyes. “Hmmm… I think he mentioned that he was about to head to our base—“

“When was this?” Aoba interrupted.

“Just when it started to rain,” Kou answered. “What’s wrong, Aoba-san? Why—Aoba-san?!”

There was _no way_ he’d be able to reach Benishigure’s base within five minutes. Aoba sprinted away before Kou could even finish his words, tracing the route back from Heibon to Benishigure’s base with hasty footsteps. He prayed silently, hoping that it wasn’t too late for him, and as soon as he found the familiar shadow, taking shelter under what seemed to be a dango store, he released a relieved sigh, fastening his pace and almost slipped from the slippery floor.

“Aoba?!”

Koujaku was obviously surprised when Aoba rushed up to him. Quickly pulling him under the shade, he wiped the droplets of water off his head, then his cheek, before he asked again,

“What are you doing here?”

“I… You forgot…” Aoba panted, out of breath.

“Hmm?” Koujaku asked.

“Umbrella,” Aoba waved the umbrella in his hand. “You forgot to take an umbrella when you left. So I thought, maybe you’d be caught in the rain and—“

He stopped the instance he noticed how Koujaku had been staring at him, wide-eyed, his mouth hanging open.

“You meant to say… you rushed over to send me an umbrella?” he asked, carefully and slowly.

Aoba nodded. “W-well, yeah. I mean, I can’t let you drenched in water when I knew that you didn’t have an umbrella, can’t I?”

Koujaku remained silent, all the while staring at Aoba with an expression that spelled of nothing but amusement.

The silence between them stretched, the sound of rainfall loud in their ears. Then, Koujaku broke into a laughter, holding his tummy while he laughed.

“Aoba…” he said when Aoba threw a pout alongside a scowl into his direction. “I… wow, thank you.”

He ruffled Aoba on the hair. Heat rose to the tips of Aoba’s ears as he pushed the umbrella into Koujaku’s chest.

“Well then, since I’m done with what I need to do here, I shall make a move.”

“Wait.” Koujaku pulled him back by grasping onto his wrist. “You don’t have an umbrella now that you’ve given me yours, right?”

Now Aoba was flustered for an entirely different reason.

“We can walk back to Heibon together,” Koujaku suggested, a clear attempt to help Aoba out of this embarrassment he’d created for himself. “Then I could borrow one from the shop.”

All Aoba could do was nodding at Koujaku as both of them squeezed themselves under the umbrella. But the moment they stepped out of their shelter, they came to realize that there’s no way this small umbrella could fit two persons.

“Koujaku, maybe we should—“

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Koujaku said, all the while trying to pull Aoba into where he wouldn’t be hit by the rain.

By the time they reached Heibon, both of them were wet from head to toe, the umbrella came into absolute no use for them to hide from the rain.

“So much for helping out, huh?” Aoba sighed.

It just seemed to him that he’d done absolutely nothing to help Koujaku out and had even given him more troubles than he would’ve initially had if Aoba hadn’t been rushing up to him.

But Koujaku was smiling when Aoba turned to look at him, for reasons unknown. Even when he left the shop, he was still wearing that bright grin on his face, a direct contrast to the weather.

And until when Aoba returned to his work, he still couldn’t figure out why Koujaku was so happy with whatever that had happened, even when it looked clearly like an unnecessary chore Aoba had caused for him.


	90. Zero Gap [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He promised him a lot of things. But was ‘happily ever after’ one of them?

The pain was terrible. His conscious flickered in and out, ache conquering him from the inside out; it was something he’d never ever felt before in his entire life – something that was so agonizingly _painful_ that his ability to think was wiped off his mind for a long time. He didn’t know what to think, _how to feel_ , or even what he should do to make everything stop. His limbs were useless; couldn’t move, couldn’t feel them. And he was sure that the loud cracking sound he heard in his ears when he hovered on top of Aoba was a clear evidence of broken bones.

He didn’t know how death would feel like; he had never experienced it before. He’d thought about it, of course. But death wasn’t an option he wanted to pursue.

Death was _never_ an option.

It’d only make others happy if he was to die and he wasn’t going to oblige to that. He didn’t seem to know of his reason of existence, but he wasn’t about to give up on his very life despite that.

That was when a light flicked in his head.

No.

He couldn’t die yet.

He couldn’t die.

Not yet.

Not now.

With his utmost strength, he mustered the remaining of his stamina, opening his eyes, blinking blood away from it and instantly lifted a smile when his vision came just a bit clearer.

He wanted so much to lift his hand, to touch that very pair of hands that was grasping so hard on him. He heard his voice – agitation, desperation. And that was really all he could hear. He wanted to say something – “ _It’s okay._ ” – but nothing came out of his mouth. He didn’t even have the energy to open his mouth.

“…iz, Noiz!”

He could hear _him_ calling his name. When was the last time someone called his name with such fervor anyway? When was the last time someone ever cared so much about him?

“Noiz, stay with me!”

_He_ was still calling his name, _his_ hands hugging his head. He could hear _his_ heartbeats loud and clear, like a melody, a lullaby –

– luring him into sleep.

He couldn’t die.

Not yet.

But if _Aoba_ was the person he would die for – then it’s fine.

His hands were sweaty, his entire body drenched in dirt and blood.

Noiz had lost consciousness before the medical team came for their rescue. He’d screamed his name, shook him, trying all he could to wake him up but yet, Noiz gave him no response, his body cold and rigid.

He thought his heart would stop beating then and there. He tried everything he could – CPR, heart-pumping, every single thing his head could produce for him. But Noiz remained still. It terrified him.

“Don’t give up…” he muttered into Noiz’s hair, hugging his head and caressing the fine strands of his hair. “Don’t you dare give up.”  
Perhaps he could still hear his voice even though he was no longer conscious. Holding onto that very thought, Aoba continued speaking to him, fearing that he might accidentally break more of his bones if he was to do as much as moving him.

He hated feeling powerless like this and he hated that he could do literally _nothing_ for Noiz but simply hugging and talking to him. Noiz had just risked his life for him and all that he could do now was… _nothing_. His heart clenched at the thought. Gritting his teeth, he kissed Noiz on the forehead, praying that the medic team could come soon and almost jumping when he heard footsteps rushing towards them.

He’d forgotten all about his own injuries. They were nothing compared to Noiz’s. He could only imagine how much _pain_ Noiz must have felt when he blocked those debris for him. And yet, he wore this smirk as if he’d just won a Rhyme match against him and all he wanted to do was to slap the smirk out of him and tell him to take care of himself first before he could think for others.

He buried his face in his hands all the way as they travelled to Midorijima Hospital.

And he continued hiding his face from view while he waited outside the emergency room, only accepting a quick wound treatment when Koujaku forced him into it then returning to sit outside the room without a word.

He knew that everyone was worried about him; he’d caught a glimpse of his grandmother and Koujaku’s concerned expressions when they first found him. He was fine, but _Noiz_ wasn’t. And _who_ was to worry about _him_ then?

He took a deep breath, praying with all his heart that the operation would go well.

There’s no way Noiz would lose his life here now. Absolutely not when he’d just rediscovered pain and a reason to move forward. There’s no way he would lose his life protecting Aoba when Aoba was the person who’d told him to live on.

Aoba wouldn’t allow that.

But there was nothing he could do but wait – and absolutely nothing in this world agonized him more than this very fact.

It felt like an eternity later when the light above the operation room dimmed. Aoba stood up in an instance, rushing towards the door and staring agitatedly as the doctors and nurses made their way out.

“You’re his family?” the doctor asked, pulling his mask away while he eyed Aoba.

“I’m… a friend. His family isn’t around,” he explained hurriedly.

The doctor shot him a quick look before he smiled, lifting the heavy stone off Aoba’s chest.

“Wounds are serious but he’s alive.”

He almost collapsed. _Noiz is alive_.

He could barely hear what the doctor said next, his heartbeats thumping stridently in his ears. It was a pat on the shoulder that had him ultimately looking up, just to see Koujaku grinning at him.

“Brat’s fine,” Koujaku said. “He’s not awake yet but he’s fine.”

Aoba was sure that Koujaku repeated ‘he’s fine’ on purpose.

And he felt as if it had been forever since he last grinned.

Waiting felt like the most natural thing to do now. When he saw Noiz next, he was heavily bandaged, lying on the hospital bed, body still with zero movement. He’d pulled a chair to sit beside him, scrutinizing every parts of his body where wounds were concealed under thick layers of bandages. He wondered if those scars would leave a permanent mark on his skin? Would his bones heal completely? Would there be any after-effects to his body after this? He should’ve talked to the doctor more about Noiz’s situation but for now, he just wanted to stay by Noiz’s side, like a parent looking after their sick child, just to make sure that they won’t feel lonely when they woke up from their nightmare.

He didn’t know how long he’d waited. Before he knew it, night has fallen and he hadn’t been eating for the entire day. He thought perhaps he could head out to get some food, or water, at the very least. But the mere thought of Noiz waking up anytime now halted every one of his intention, locking him to his bed as he continued gazing at Noiz’s sleeping features. He really looked like his age now, he thought. Acting completely out of instinct, he raised a finger and traced the outline of Noiz’s features – along the bridge of his nose, his coarse skin texture, his lips. He never knew a lot about Noiz. But when he was staring at him like this, it occurred to him on how _young_ Noiz was and how much he wanted to look after him. Not just now, but after this, when Noiz was discharged, when Noiz ventured into a new path in his life, when Noiz….

He stopped. Would Noiz want him to be part of his life? Now that he’d regained sensations, he might possess a different thought towards things now – towards the world, himself, and…

… _him_.

He wouldn’t mind if Noiz had better plans from now on, even if he wasn’t part of it.

But when he pressed his face against Noiz’s bandaged hand, closing his eyes and attempting to shut his thoughts off, he knew that he was lying to himself – the ache in his heart had told him so.

He didn’t even know when he fell asleep. When he woke up, his surrounding was bright, urging him to lift a hand to cover his vision just to realize that a hand was stroking his hair.

Panic, he jumped, and almost gasped when he saw Noiz, sitting up, leaning against the bedhead, visibly taken aback by Aoba’s abrupt action.

“…yo,” he said.

“Y-you…” Aoba was lost for words. Noiz was… awake. He was awake. He was perfectly healthy; well, he _looked_ perfectly healthy, his signature smirk gracing his features, his voice as husky as Aoba remembered it to be.

“Y-you’re awake,” he stuttered.

Noiz’s smirked lifted higher. “I am.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Aoba asked, not knowing what else to say.

“Hmmm,” Noiz drifted his gaze to the ceiling momentarily, then back at Aoba. “It hurts. But,” he paused, just to observe Aoba’s reaction before he continued. “I’m alive.”

Too much emotions were swelling within Aoba. Before he knew it, he was launching towards Noiz, hugging him on the head and ruffling him on the hair as he said,

“Thank you.”

He could barely feel Noiz’s touch when he returned his hug, his movement must have been tough still, having just woken up. But he heard Noiz’s words loud and clear, rolling right into his ears and landing right on his heart.

“ _Thank you_.”

He didn’t know if Noiz would ever feel differently now that he’d regained his sensations.

But Noiz’s tone when he muttered those two words was sincere – and that was all he ever needed now: for Noiz to be alive, and for Noiz to look and feel the same as how he remembered him to be.


	91. Just Because [Koujaku x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the unplanned moments turn out to be one of the best moments.

Trees stand mute in the summer air. The street smothered and sent up a disorienting haze. As the allotted time draws near, the steady summer heat becomes far less bearable than usual. But none of these unpleasant, scorching atmosphere was stopping any of them from their routine – Koujaku concentrating hard on his customer’s hair, slim frown in between his eyebrows as his hands moved swiftly around, the scissors moving in expert motion. Sweat trickled down Aoba’s back as he stirred the equipment around the space, beading on his forehead and dripped from his chin. He wiped them off with the back of his hand, feeling just a tad lightheaded as he collapsed into one of the chairs in the corner, staring out of the window and heaving a relieved sigh upon realizing that the very customer that Koujaku was working on was the last for the day.

Business had been stable – even good – for them ever since they’d officially opened the shop. It was chaotic at first, but eventually, they started grasping a hang of how things worked. And eventually, Aoba started balancing between his working time at Heibon and the time he could spend to help Koujaku in his shop, despite Koujaku still being very much hesitant towards this very decision of his. But actions had proven that everything was merely Koujaku being overly agitated and in due time, he’d come to accept Aoba’s constant presence in the shop without needing to throw him tons of questions just to make sure that it was really fine.

While Aoba sat and waited for Koujaku to be done with, he played with Ren’s fur, gazing mindlessly at passers by carrying out their daily routines from the window. It’s only when he heard the sound of chair dragging along floor that he returned his attention to the pair.

“Thank you for your patronage,” Koujaku bowed. “Hope you’ll visit again.”

The customer – a young, black-haired lady with a warm smile – returned Koujaku’s bow and headed out, giving Aoba a small nod of head before she closed the door behind her.

“Well, I guess we’re done,” Koujaku stretched.

“Thank you for your hard work,” Aoba grinned. Standing up, he walked towards Koujaku, just to find his steps freezing in midway when he noticed how dog-tired Koujaku looked like at this moment.

He didn’t remember ever seeing Koujaku being in this state. Was it the weather? Or was it the workload? Koujaku was always organized; his smile never failed to charm, his face spotless and bright, his hair lustrous and well-kept. But now, sheen of sweat drenched his skin, highlighting the contour of his muscles, strands of his hair dishevelled. When he propped towards Aoba to peck him tenderly on the lips – a gesture that had eventually become a habit – he felt salt on his lips, causing him to release an innate hitch of breath in between their ephemeral kiss.

“So… shall we?” Koujaku murmured against his lips. He wasn’t sure if it was thanks to the heat or that Koujaku was _actually_ flustered that was painting that shade of pink on his cheeks. With a scowl, he tiptoed and pressed his own lips against Koujaku’s once again, a tad more aggressive than how Koujaku had done it, and pulled him to sit on the chair where the customer last sat.

“Aoba?”

“We don’t have time to go back for a shower,” Aoba interrupted him. “Don’t you feel hot?”

“I do,” Koujaku admitted with a bitter smile. “But it’s summer after all. There’s nothing we can do about it.”

Well, Koujaku had his point. Aoba was at the verge of boiling by now; the weather so humid as if the sun was attempting to suck the remaining fluid out of them. His own hair was cut short, so at least he could still feel the breeze around his neck, his jacket long abandoned in his house, no longer practical to be worn. But Koujaku was still keeping his hair the way Aoba had always remembered it to be. He’d witnessed him waking up with his hair loose and long, draping over his fine torso, strands of it hanging around his shoulder. He’d felt his hair on his very fingers, completely out of his own instinct, and finding himself admiring how Koujaku managed to keep his appearance in such an elegant way despite him having scars staining all over his body, a trait that was far to be seen as part of beauty.

And when he woke and cleaned himself up, he’d always tie his hair, still it with the hair accessory that he’d come to acknowledge as part of himself, and then making sure that his bangs was properly covering half of his face before he’d greet Aoba with his usual perky grin.

Every part of Koujaku’s body had become something so familiar to Aoba now and he couldn’t help but wonder how exactly he’d look like if he was to pull off something _different_. He placed his hands on Koujaku’s shoulders, meeting gaze with his in the mirror’s reflection and smiled.

“Want to try something different?” he smirked, instantly responded by Koujaku’s frenetic brightening of eyes.

“W-wait, you don’t mean to cut my hair now, do you?”

“Haha,” Aoba chuckled. “Nothing like that. But I do want to try doing something to your hair.”

Without waiting for any further response, he pulled the accessory out of Koujaku’s hair, setting it loose and ran his fingers through the strands of refined, smooth texture.

“…Aoba…?” Koujaku called out after a few seconds of silence, visibly wary.

“Hm?” Aoba hummed. He combed Koujaku’s hair with his fingers, the hair accessory clipped in between his lips. He looked so serious it did nothing to ease Koujaku’s tension.

“…What are you doing?”

Aoba took the accessory off his lips, sending a smirk at Koujaku’s reflection before he gripped a handful of his hair and pulled it up.

Koujaku almost fell off his chair.

“I’ve been wondering,” he finally said, slowly, _very_ slowly. “How would you look like having your hair styled a _different_ way?”

He grabbed a band from the basket of tools on the table, frowning as he worked on Koujaku’s hair. It wasn’t too thick, wasn’t too thin either, and it only took a few gestures for him to lock the bunch of hair right at the back of Koujaku’s head, his neck now fully exposed.

“Done,” he proclaimed at long last, looking up just to see Koujaku beaming at him in the mirror.

“W-what?”

“Nothing,” Koujaku curved his lips higher. “Just wondering how endearing it is to see you being so attracted towards my looks.”

He felt heat burning his cheeks. Looking away, he pouted, seeing Koujaku’s shadow standing up from the corner of his eyes and feeling a hand ruffling his own hair.

“Maybe I could try this once in a while. Does it look good on me?”

He didn’t even need to ask. Regardless of how Koujaku was to wear his style, he already had that natural charisma that would allow him to pull absolutely _anything_ off effortlessly.

Aoba might have imagined it, but the way he was wearing his ponytail higher than his usual low tie had somehow revitalised his entire features better. He was wearing a brighter smile, his face smeared with glow, his gestures more confident than usual. His bangs still veiled half of his face but for some reason, the new look had given him a new revelation to a distinctive side of himself that he could face, that the world who knew Koujaku as who he was could anticipate.

Even when it was still dreadfully roasting when they walked out of the shop, summer suddenly felt less horrendous now; knowing that it was also an opportunity for them to try something new, something that they never thought they’d try.

And that step would eventually bring them towards vaster ones, even when it was done out of a spur-of-the-moment, but also of necessity.


	92. Winner [Noiz x Desire]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s only one person he wants to win.

He already noticed the twinkle in his eyes when he first met him. Standing right in the middle of the field, a face of confidence, and of unwavering determination. He already knew that he’d win, regardless of how confronted he appeared to be. He was engrossed with this overwhelming aura, this intense heat of dominance that the loud cheers of his name surrounding him did nothing but complementing the natural victorious smirk he was already wearing.

_Sly Blue! Sly Blue! Sly Blue!_

Ah, yes. What a familiar name; the name he’d researched in and out of, the name he’d perceived as the one and only deserving to be placed by his side. But he wasn’t by his side yet. Sly Blue was still above him and he swore to take his throne off his head one day.

He swore he’d wipe that smirk off his face, putting it on his own, and he swore he’d make Sly Blue fall to his feet, look at him with expression that spelt of misery and submission.

He swore he’d make Sly Blue admit the _winner_ within him.

He lifted a smirk when Sly Blue’s opponent fell head first towards the ground, forehead hitting the hard surface while the shouting around them elevated. Clicking his tongue, he stuffed his hands into his pockets, turning his back towards the scene, not noticing how Sly Blue had thrown a grin at his direction, his gaze still as sharp as ever.

He knew everything about Sly Blue – from where he stayed to where he hung out and to who he loitered with. Digging for information had always been his strength and he was particularly grateful to have owned up to his name when a quick skillful search pulled up everything he needed to know.

The first glance of Sly Blue’s _real name_ had him staring for a whole five seconds though. He wasn’t expecting anything but he definitely wasn’t expecting himself to find something so… _normal_ about Sly Blue. He was so far up there, so hard to reach; he almost felt inhuman, nothing of what he’d seen of his name had suggested.

But he had the name memorized, even though _Sly Blue_ was still a dominant figure that’d always resurface whenever he was hit by the overpowering need to fight.

He found himself wandering mindlessly to where Sly Blue hung out again, one night after he’d done with dinner and no longer had anything else he wanted to do. He looked around. The base was crowded, filled with people that looked like they were destined to waste their life in the void. But none of them caught his attention. He was expecting a Rhyme match – a drive-by, maybe – but it never happened either. So he leaned against the wall, starting to feel that he was merely wasting another night here when he saw a shadow slanting against the vacant space by his side from the corner of his eye.

The flicker of blue had his heart skipping a beat.

“New face,” the man said, his voice small, but clear, loud, _familiar_.

He looked around, finding himself gaping when he was responded with a sharp, glimmering gold of gaze. Sly Blue was standing right next to him, a beer can in one hand, a teasing smirk gracing his features.

“Don’t go,” he said, grasping onto Noiz’s wrist before Noiz could even move. “Am sure you aren’t here just to peek. Or are you?”

Noiz merely stared. He wasn’t anticipating an ambush but now that what done was done, he was quick to reaffirm his composure, mirroring the smirk Sly Blue was giving him as he returned to lean against the wall, in a position that was closer than how it was from before.

“Looking for me?” Sly Blue teased, drowning alcohol down his throat right after.

“Yeah,” Noiz said, perfectly dismissive, totally unconcerned.

Sly Blue choked on his drink. He gave Noiz a wary stare before he laughed, the sound splitting.

“You’re far too young to fight me, brat,” he chuckled. “Come back in maybe… ten years’ time.”

He was already well aware of how cocky Sly Blue could appear to be. It was his signature trait after all. And he was all the more prepared for it – for he was sure that his level of cockiness was no way lower than the man.

“Afraid that you might lose to a kid?” he smirked, immediately wiping the grin off Sly Blue’s face.

“Say for yourself,” Sly Blue said. He threw the beer can aside, stretched, and was about to walk away when he stopped, just to look at Noiz from over his shoulder. “What a lame way to flirt with someone, by the way.”

And he walked away.

But he didn’t walk out of his life. When Noiz stopped by the next day, he was there again, leaning against the wall, crunching on his gums, and giving Noiz a tongue-in-cheek grin when he saw the man approach him.

They didn’t need to say anything more. They didn’t fight, they didn’t exchange conversation; Noiz merely followed him without a word, a gesture that he couldn’t quite understand himself. He watched him fight, as usual. He watched him loiter around, as usual. And at the end of the day, when he came into the silent comfort the both of them shared by the corner of an alley, he jerked when Sly Blue pushed him hard on the shoulder.

“What do you want from me?” he asked. “I said I’m not interested to fight you.”

Noiz _wanted_ to fight him. Sly Blue was the strongest, and he wanted to conquer him to ease his own thirst. It’s a _desire_ he’d wanted for himself for the longest time ever. But now, when he was so close, literally speaking and standing right next to him, he suddenly found that very intention vanishing into thin air.

He wanted to be _by_ Sly Blue’s side. That’s all.

The countless days they’d spent together after that was a silent battle of its own; with less words, less interactions. And countless days of them doing nothing but throwing each other snarky grins. He didn’t expect Sly Blue to be a person as such; he always seemed so cruel, so swift in his actions, and caring about another person seemed like the last thing he’d do. But he allowed Noiz to come close to him like no one ever did. He let Noiz follow him, eat his food, hear him rant, watch him fight.

He let Noiz be his shadow.

It didn’t take long before Noiz gained a reputation of his own – on top of being one of the stronger Rhymers in Midorijima, he was also a loyal follower of Sly Blue, and it didn’t take long before Noiz finally lost control of his patience as he pinned Sly Blue against the wall in one of the darker alleys they used to hang around, his veins twitching in mild annoyance as Sly Blue lifted the nastier grin he could conjure at him, as if he’d expecting it.

“Finally,” he mumbled under his breath. “Was wondering how long more would it take for you to lose your patience.”

He didn’t even know what made him do it. Before he knew it, he was locking lips with the man, feeling bites on the soft peeling of his lips, feeling scratches on his back, and feeling Sly Blue’s tongue in his mouth, sucking, _biting_ , tasting blood that he couldn’t tell was his or Sly Blue’s.

Sex wasn’t something he’d been looking forward to when he approached Sly Blue, but their bodies worked on impulse, their instincts knew them better than they themselves do. There were sweat, blood, mingling fluid, moans, cracking through the dark and breaking the silence of his room as he invited a magnet that he was powerlessly attracted to. He’d never felt anguish, never felt lust in a way as powerful as how he did when he laid his hands on Sly Blue’s body. His skin felt sweet, slippery, _fragile_ ; everything that’s opposing what Noiz had once believed of Sly Blue to be. And whatever impression he’d had towards him before was crushed so easily in just one night, leaving him dangling on the border between curiosity and craving, questions after questions flooding his head like waves.

He held Sly Blue in his hands, realizing how _small_ he actually was, how _warm_  he actually felt. When Sly Blue moved just a tad, he found his heart skipping a beat, unable to believe that whatever that had just happened was a reality of its own.

“Say…”

The afterglow was quick but comforting; just them being immersed in the arousal of surrealism.

“I never knew your name,” Sly Blue said. Under the dim light of the moon spraying feebly through the window, he could see Sly Blue’s golden pair of eyes glimmering under it, slightly dazed, but still preserving the sharpness Noiz had always been fond towards.

He was surprised; _every Rhymer_ on this island knew of him, just like how they knew of Sly Blue. Perhaps he was simply detached, perhaps he simply didn’t care.

Perhaps he cared _now._

“Noiz,” he replied meekly. He heard Sly Blue mouthing his name – “… _Noiz_ …” – then he felt a hand sneaking its way up his torso, caressing his chin.

“Noiz,” Sly Blue called. “I’m—“

“—Aoba,” Noiz interrupted. He felt _Aoba_ ’s motion stop on his chin, instantly realizing that he’d spelled the wrong word. Since when did he replace Sly Blue’s name with _Aoba_? And since when did _Aoba_ become a figure that was more than just the legendary Sly Blue?

“…no one ever called me that, except Granny,” _Aoba_ said. This was it, he ruined it, he’d stepped into a league he wasn’t suppose to invade.

But _Aoba_ comment nothing of that. Simply cuddling in Noiz’s embrace, he closed his eyes, yawning soundlessly before he said,

“Let’s fight in Rhyme tomorrow.”

Winning Sly Blue had always been a goal he dreaded to achieve. It’d give him a sense of accomplishment, of self-recognition. But now, when he held _Aoba_ firmer in his hands, he knew that it was no longer an unattainable goal.

Because he could beat Sly Blue anytime, in Rhyme – with his skills. But _Aoba_ had won him from the very beginning, not being the legend Noiz had always looked up to, but as a person of his own – whom Noiz was now desperately in love with.


	93. Just Impulses [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is there any other way to tell if Noiz had grown more than he remembered him to be?

Noiz is growing.

Of course he is.

Whenever he was reminded of that very fact, he’d find his eyes shifting unconsciously to where Noiz was sitting, scrutinizing him from head to toe as if attempting to catch the minutest hint of difference on him. He tried hard to remember how Noiz once was when they first met – reckless, for sure, and definitely… smaller than how he was now?

He knew Noiz was growing, but he couldn’t quite trust his own judgement either. Did he grow _a lot_? Or was he just being overly paranoid?

There’s no way he could outgrow him, right? Not _too much_ , at the very least.

But there was no way he could tell. If he was to make Noiz measure his height and weight every month, Noiz would definitely laugh at him.

There’s no way he would give him the chance to tease him more than he already did.

So he kept it to himself, even though he was quite sure that Noiz had seen through him simply just from the smirk he was throwing at him whenever he wasn’t fast enough to avert their gaze.

_Did he grow in senses as well?_ Aoba wondered. Noiz was intelligent after all. He’d probably pick up things in lightning speed, despite him being unable to feel anything at all just a year back.

Sensations seemed to be something Noiz had come to get used to nowadays, even though his response still seemed dull when he happened to encounter any incident that could trigger some sort of hyperbole: bring pricked by needles, for instance. Did his inability to feel pain from before give him the ability to be able to endure pain now? Aoba would never understand how it’d work for Noiz; he never had the problem to feel pain, after all. But there was one thing he could be certain with –

– of how Noiz could be so chockfull with sensations in bed that often gave out how he was so _lacked_ of them for the past decade of his life.

When he walked out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, Noiz had already propped himself against the bed head, looking through what seemed to be a full page of document before he dismissed his holograms and opened both his arms wide at Aoba’s direction. With a pout, Aoba walked towards him, naturally sinking into his embrace as he felt the warm touch of Noiz spreading across his cold skin the moment their bodies came into contact.

“Still working?” he asked, eyeing deviously at Noiz’s Coil on the bedside table.

“No more,” Noiz said flippantly. He tilted Aoba’s chin towards his direction, leaning down just to kiss Aoba lovingly on the lips, a gesture loud and clear enough to express his intention.

“Not too much, alright?” Aoba mumbled against his lips. “You’ve got work tomorrow.”

“Hm,” Noiz hummed, visibly not paying much attention. His hand snaked downwards, loosening the towel on Aoba’s waist and pulling it aside, leaving Aoba completely naked.

He took a few moments to appreciate the view, then inched closer against Aoba’s neck again and sniffed.

“I love it when you just came out from the shower. Smell nice,” he said in a low breath.

“What are you? A dog?” Aoba chuckled.

Well, he couldn’t deny how much _he_ loved Noiz’s scent when he was fresh out of shower either. The remaining of his retorts were soon interrupted by Noiz’s wet kiss, his tongue showed no hesitance, slipping into Aoba’s mouth like the most natural thing to do as Aoba clung onto his neck, craving for support. It was easy to get into the mood when both of them were clearly yearning so much for each other like this, when motions replaced words as the best language between them and when their bodies knew just the right thing to do even without them to send each other any signals whatsoever.

He gasped when he felt Noiz’s hand on his dick, pumping languidly, his squeezes soft yet appropriate.

“W-wait,” he struggled. Sitting up, he pushed Noiz’s hand away, eyeing his dick, then Noiz’s, which was already half-hard, hint of dampness coating the head of it.

“What’s the matter?” Noiz asked, sounding distinctly frustrated. He was pink on the face, sheen of sweat smeared his torso. He looked so visibly aroused it made Aoba feel bad for keeping him on the edge.

“Just… stay still,” he said.

He knew it might spoil the mood but it’s something he’d been pondering when he was in the shower. If there’s one way to tell if Noiz had grown at all throughout the time they had spent together… this could be one of it.

So, without another word, he moved with his knees, coming close to Noiz as he placed two hands on Noiz’s shoulders, urging him to sit.

“What’s in your mind?” Noiz lifted a provocative smirk, which was responded by a frown from Aoba.

“It’s nothing like what you have in mind,” he said, albeit with a small voice. He looked away, no longer willing to see Noiz in the eyes, as he budged his attention their dicks.

They were both stirred, their dicks standing, body fluid a clear presence on their arousals. Swallowing down his throat, he creeped closer, reaching out to Noiz’s dick and, imitating how Noiz had done it earlier, thrusting it up and down, unhurriedly, experimentally.

Noiz had closed his eyes then, completely enjoying the slow build of pleasure Aoba was giving him now. And while he felt tension building at the pit of his own stomach, he edged closer again, then pressing _both_ of their dicks together. _Hard_.

He heard Noiz hitch a breath.

“Heh, so this is what you want to do today?” Noiz goaded, his gaze darkened with profound lust.  
“I-it’s nothing like what you think it is,” Aoba stuttered. He was slowly but surely feeling the heat himself and he wanted nothing but to let Noiz have his way at him but he needed to grit his teeth, swallow that very urge down, until he could confirm something _important_ with his own hands.

“Then what is it?” Noiz’s voice resounded in his ears. His palm was sweaty, pre-cum mingling with sweat. His gaze steamy, the dimmed light in the room not helping his sight the slightest. Acting completely out of impulse, he crouched, coming face-to-face with their dicks, and stopped rubbing.

“…?” He could feel Noiz’s eyes on him but he couldn’t bother with an explanation now. Trying hard to ignore the irritation in his veins, he squinted, eyeing hard to make out the outline of both of their dicks, leaning so close that his nose was almost touching the slit of his own dick.

“What are you doing?” Noiz asked, sounding both exasperated and curious.

He couldn’t see much difference but he was _sure_ that Noiz was bigger than he remembered him to be. Was it because of the piercings that had given him a misconception? Or was it because of the bad lighting in the room that had obscured his sensible judgement? He tried rubbing both of their dicks again, pressing them harder together, drawing a truncated moan out of Noiz at the same time.

The difference was barely palpable but he was _certain_ that Noiz had grown bigger, maybe just a tad. But what hit his dignity harder was the fact that Noiz wasn’t even fully hard yet and _yet_ he could already tell that he’d outsized him.

“Hey.” He looked up upon the sound, all the while wearing a frown on his face. “What’s the matter?”

Now Noiz looked more concerned than anything else.

“Would you ever stop growing, I wonder?” he said out loud. Out of distress, he started pumping both of their dicks again, chasing towards pleasure that’d subsided and only stopping when he felt Noiz’s hand on his.

“I can’t help it,” Noiz gave a delayed answer. Aoba could tell how hard he was trying not to laugh. “But,” his hand was pushed aside, his body lifted, his felt his back hitting the soft material of their mattress in the next second. “isn’t’ it better for me to be bigger? So that I can fill you up better?”

He swore he’d melt an ice if one was to be placed on his body now. Noiz was totally missing the point and he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to argue with him. This was more than just feeling good, it was also a matter of his pride and he definitely didn’t want Noiz to get too boastful over this.

He needed a better confirmation, one that wasn’t being done when he was half consumed by lust. But all of these could wait; what he _couldn’t_ wait, was how the mere realization of Noiz being _bigger_ now triggered something he never knew existed within him – the imagination of Noiz being able to bury himself _deeper_ within him giving him a new sense of yearning that he knew he was all the willing to cast his sky-high pride aside for.

Just for Noiz.


	94. Our Bunnies [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was a legend. But for them, it was reality.

Midorijima never failed to make him feel like home. As promised, he returned every three months for a visit, often having to listen to long lectures from Tae about wasting money until they finally settled down in his very own hometown. Their visit usually took a week, sometimes a few days, depending on how hectic Noiz’s workload was. But every time they were back, they felt as if they were brought back to time – to when they were still free and roaming in Midorijima, and when the sense of reality wasn’t as heavy as it was now.

This time, as they returned for their usual visit, they managed to bump into mid-autumn, one festival that had Noiz perking a curious eyebrow when Aoba mentioned it offhandedly.

“Huh? You’ve never heard about it?” Aoba asked, wide-eyed.

Noiz shook his head. “It’s not something we practice.”

He must’ve meant how culture in Germany worked. But isn’t Noiz’s ancestor Japanese? Or was it because of the situation he was in that had pushed that very tradition out of their heritage?

“Ever?” Aoba asked, just to confirm.

Noiz shrugged. “Well, since we’re here, care to explain?”

“That’s what I thought too!” Aoba grinned. Pulling his Coil up, they leaned against the bedhead in Aoba’s room, Noiz waiting patiently as Aoba clicked a few keywords into the search bar.

“We celebrate this on the 15th of every September. Look at this,” Aoba explained, pointing at what seemed like a few round foods lined along a wooden stick. “This is _Tsukimi Dango_ , something like rice dumplings. We eat this and moon-gaze at night.”

“Hmm,” Noiz hummed, sounding between interested and disinterested. “So what’s the purpose of this festival?”

“Ah, I forgot,” Aoba chuckled bitterly. “We appreciate the moon.”

“That’s all?”

Aoba nodded, sounding all the more gleeful with every passing second as he dismissed the holograms from his Coil. “That’s it.”

Noiz could not understand. Aoba had told him countless times about how he lacked common sense and that how nothing seemed to interest him in particular, with the exception of himself. After a long debate about this very issue about him that he never seemed to understand why it’s a problem in the first place, they’d come to a compromise to experience as many things as they could together just so Noiz could show just a tad more interest in whatever that’s happening in this world.

And mid-autumn was a great chance. With that thought in mind, Aoba scurried out of bed, totally ignoring Noiz’s heaty hint of intimacy and dragged his boyfriend out of the room, right into the kitchen.

“If we’re going to celebrate it, might as well enjoy the whole process, right?” he said with a cheeky grin. The next thing Noiz knew, he was wearing an apron, joining the Seragaki family, and finding himself rolling flour after flour, with the whole _Tsukimi Dango_ session ending with them sprinking flour onto each other and earning themselves loud scolding from Tae right after.

It also seemed like Tae had a more forward-thinking mind than any of them. When they expressed the intention to step out to the nearest field for moon-gazing, she stopped them before they could head out, coming back with two bags of what seemed like sets of attire, and opening it up for them just to see both Aoba and Noiz gaping at them.

“T-this is…” Aoba stuttered, staring at the set of _hakama_ folded nicely in Tae’s hands.

“Thought you might want to experience this as well,” Tae said, sounding as disinterested as usual.

“Did you make this for us?” Aoba said, starting to make sense of what was happening.

“I don’t do it by myself, Koujaku helped too, since he knows better of how this works than I do.”

“Ah, haha.” He needed to remind himself to than Koujaku before they leave.

“Now, hurry up and get prepared, it’s turning dark soon,” Tae hushed, pushing the two sets of _hakama_ into each of their arms and steering them up the stairs. “I’ll take care of the food.”

The next half an hour was an anguish of their own as they attempted to put up the set of _hakama_ on themselves. It wasn’t the first time they were wearing one of those; when they were back in Midorijima the last summer, they’d gotten the chance to dress themselves in _yukata_ and managed to venture into the traditional Japanese summer festival before they returned Germany. Similarly, now that they’re back here once again, the same chance knocked on their doorsteps again, but presenting a different occasion altogether.

“I think we’re done,” Aoba announced, staring at his own reflection in the mirror, then at Noiz. Noiz looked as good as he presumed him to be. He eyed him from head to toe, taking sight of his beautiful, vaguely seeable body shape, his front exposed with the soft green of his _hakama_ complementing the lime-green of his eyes.

“Not quite,” Noiz said, taking Aoba off guard. And before he knew it, he was walking towards him, turning him around and slipping his fingers through the strands of Aoba’s hair.

“What are you doing?” Aoba asked, staring awkwardly at his own reflection in the mirror.

“Your hair,” Noiz responded under his breath, almost sounding like he’s whispering.

“Hmm?”

He bundled his hair up, pulling it into a high ponytail before he stretched to reach for a hair band on the bedside table then gripping it in place.

“You look good with your hair up,” he pronounced his delayed answer. Then, without warning, Aoba jumped upon feeling a soft, feather-light touch against the nape of his neck, sending chills all the way down his spine. “And since you’re wearing this, might as well.”

Noiz was _definitely_ doing this on purpose. Gritting his teeth, Aoba sent him a backward glare, gripping his wrist tight before he could say anything and hauled the both of them out of the room, to where Tae was waiting with their food packages.

The moon illuminated the tenebrous sky, splashing down its watery white-silver glow onto the field as they sat, bathing them, illuminating them. Gentle breeze enveloped them as they started munching on their food, completely immersed in the solitude of the night.

“it’s good that the weather’s nice today,” Aoba said, swallowing one _dango_ down his throat right after. “It’d be such a shame to miss this when we’re literally here.”

Noiz merely ate without saying anything much. Starting to worry that he was finding this boring, Aoba inched towards him, leaning his weight against his arm as he stared at the moon.

“The moon’s amazing, isn’t it?” he asked, feeling Noiz staring at the same time.

“It’s beautiful,” Noiz admitted. “Feels different from Germany’s.”

Aoba chuckled. “No way. The moon is the same regardless of where we see it from.”

“Still,” Noiz retorted. He intertwined their fingers together, allowing a momentary silence to stretch between them before he continued. “it always feels different looking at it with you.”

Aoba felt heat rising to the tip of his ear but he quickly shook his head, punching Noiz lightly on the arm.

“You have no shame,” he laughed.

“I’m serious.” He definitely sounded so. But it was still too shameless for him to be able to speak it out loud like this.

“Hey,” he called out, quietly, following the serene pace of the wind. “Do you think there are really bunnies on the moon?”

“Huh?”

“Ah, oh! Sorry, I forgot,” Aoba laughed bitterly. “Well, it’s said that bunnies stay on the moon, working, protecting the moon… or something like that.”

He must have sounded really stupid, and he was sure that Noiz’s gaze on him wasn’t something he’d like to see now.

“I mean, it’s a legend, of course. There’s no way there’s any bunny up there, right?”

Noiz remained silent; it had become too hard to breathe for Aoba. So he quickly looked up at Noiz, throwing a smile at his direction, struggling to get his tangled thoughts out in perfect sense.

“But if there’s one, though…” he said slowly. “I’d think of rescuing it.”

He let the pause stretch, but just for mere moments.

“Don’t you think it’s lonely for them to be up there? With no one else with them, just them… doing their own things… forever…”

He trailed off, letting his own thoughts sink in, wondering what had made him say it. But before he could continue, Noiz had wrapped an arm around him, covering him in nostalgic warmth that had him leaning towards him out of reflex.

“It’s very like you to say something like this,” Noiz said at long last, eyes fixed at the bright moon hanging above them. “Saving people, empathizing with them, and now, even feeling and wanting to do the same to animals.”

It was then that Aoba realized how Noiz had seen through him before he could himself.

“Yeah, I guess so,” he admitted. “I don’t even notice this until you put it this way.”

Noiz released what sounded like a small smile.

“But that’s how you come to save me,” he said, calmly, every one of his word sounded like a sort of melody. “Bunny or not, you’ll save them, just like how you saved me.”

Noiz was warm; he felt safe in his embrace.

He wanted to tell Noiz that he’d done the same for him as well – wiping his insecurity aside, embracing him in comfort, assuring him over and over again that he was worth more than he could ever value it himself.

But Noiz always had a way with words – he always stepped one step faster than him, realizing things faster than him, and in the end, returning the very same feelings he held towards him at him.

It’s unfair.

But he’s fine with it.

“Next time, let me do it,” Noiz broke the silence.

“Huh?”

“Let me be the one saving the bunny,” Noiz smirked, throwing an instant uncanny feeling down his gut.

“W-wait, you don’t mean to say… you’re—“

“Well, regardless if there’s any bunny on the moon, I know perfectly well that I have one with me now,” Noiz said, confirming Aoba’s question.”

“You little…!”

And for all they knew, they might be just like the bunnies on the moon, working by themselves for the longest time ever, being alone, but at the end of the day, when the sun rise, they’d be able to achieve light, finding comfort in each other’s presence, and ultimately, saving each other’s back again and again.

And they’d be the moon to each other’s darkness, shining the path in their qualms and leading each other back to the right path. This was what they’re here for, and what they’d promised each other to.


	95. Second By Second [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s only so much loneliness he could take.

[ **10:00AM** ]

The usual examination never concerned him. Even when the doctor injected the second dose of drugs into him, he felt little to nothing. Everyone had been nice to him; it’s probably because of how he was residing in one of the most expensive rooms in this hospital, or perhaps it could be due to how he’d managed to hear whispers of nurses down the corridor, speaking about how good-looking he was right after they closed his room’s door.

He wasn’t used to feeling privileged. He was, however, used to feeling lonely.

But now, for some reason, he didn’t like it at all. Knowing that he’d experienced how not being lonely felt like, he stared blankly at the ceiling, the magazine he was reading before the doctor came in for his daily check totally discarded aside.

He looked at the time on his Coil – 10:16AM.

It’s seven hours until he would no longer feel this solitude.

Seven hours of him being alone.

[ **2:00PM** ]

The hospital tasted stale. Tasteless. Nothing like anything he’d ever tasted before. Perhaps his tastebuds weren’t completely functional yet, seeing how he’d been indulging in endless medications ever since he was being admitted.  
But that didn’t make sense either. Because Aoba’s donuts tasted sweet, and he wondered if his tastebuds only reacted specifically towards whatever Aoba was to bring to him…

…including the taste of his lips on his, the sweet taste of his tongue, the roll of shivers down his spine when Aoba did as much as letting out a small moan.

He raised a finger, swiping featherlight touch over his lower lip as he considered.

The first time they’d made love in this hospital, the first time they’d confessed, coming upfront with their feelings. The first time he’d felt heat so intense he never thought it’d be possible.

The first time he’d felt another person’s warmth, another person’s taste, all with sensations he never thought he would possibly obtain.

He laid his head on the pillow, his eyes closed, the heat that’d travelled down south now accumulating at a place he was dying to touch.  
He took another deep breath, his eyes still closed. The only sound remaining in the room was the sound of turning ceiling fan and the barely audible rackets from outside his window that he couldn’t care to bother. Releasing his breath, he stretched his hand, to where a bulge was palpable from beneath the sheets and stroked it. Lightly.

His breathing was heavy but his mind equally so. His sensations were dull, his limbs weren’t as robust as he used to be. But he could clearly feel the tension on his lower half, accumulating with every passing second, and soon, he could no longer hear any sound; not the sound of the fan, nor the sound from outside his window.

Just Aoba’s.

[ **5:00PM** ]

He couldn’t concentrate on anything at all. His magazine was opened on his lap but he no longer found interest in the range of AllMates documented in it. His eyes wandered from one page or another, barely registering anything in it and barely paying attention. Until when he heard a knock on the door that he looked up, heart thumping in his ears, all motion frozen.

“It’s me. Can I come in?”

It was the same voice that had been ringing in his ears for the longest time; the same voice that had been giving him all sorts of feelings he never knew he possessed. Then, he heard a click, the loud pounding beneath his chest only became wilder when he spotted the wide grin on the visitor’s face.

“How are you feeling today?” Aoba asked, putting down a plastic bag of what smelled like fresh-made donuts as he pulled a chair to sit by Noiz’s bed.

But right before he could do just that, Noiz grasped him over by the wrist, causing him to fall right on the bed, hauling their distance close.

“N-Noiz?” Aoba voiced out, visibly confused, visibly flustered.

But all Noiz did was smiling at him, then hugging him, his head buried against his shoulder, smelling in Aoba’s scent and feeling the warmth returned to him.

It was seven whole hours of waiting - or perhaps more than that - that had made him realize the truth behind Aoba’s words, that he couldn’t be alone, and that he wasn’t allowed to be alone anymore.

Simply because he’d learned how it actually felt to not be alone that he was feeling all these complicated emotions.

And Aoba was the one who’d made him feel this way; Aoba was the one who’d promised him a world without loneliness.


	96. The Little Things [Mink x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the tiny gestures that speak the loudest message. It’s the beautiful routine that expresses the most.

> **Massages (giving / receiving)**

The late evening light streaked through the trees in both brilliant and shadowy beams. The forest that was once alive now chilled him as they walked with hushed steps, heading towards where lights were palpable. The longer they walked, the wider the path grew, stretching towards the clearance where it would lead them home.

Aoba released a relieved breath upon seeing the familiar track that would bring him towards where warmth was; the chilliness of the autumn air now smearing goose bumps all over him. He followed as close as he could to Mink, who seemed to have not minded a tad of how the atmosphere around them had changed in rapid speed.

As soon as they reached home, Aoba stretched, grinning widely as he settled himself into the nearest couch he could find.

“I still can’t get used to it,” he said, finally finding his voice.

“The forest?” Mink asked, sitting by his side, their distance just an arm-length apart.

“Uhuh,” Aoba nodded. “Don’t you think it’s scary? I mean, you can’t see anything in there, what if there’s some sort of… beast…”

Mink lifted a small smile.

“I would know if there’s one,” he said, an attempt to calm Aoba down.

“I wouldn’t,” Aoba pouted. “I still need to explore more.”

“You’ll get used to it soon,” Mink said. He closed his eyes, taking deep breath, visibly trying to relax.

“Are you tired?” Aoba asked upon noticing his wearisome features.

“A bit,” Mink admitted. “Nothing a night rest wouldn’t fix.”

“Hmmm,” Aoba hummed. Mink’s always tired when he returned. Interacting with people might have worn him out, seeing how it wasn’t something he was used to. There was once when Aoba caught sight of him speaking and _smiling_ at customers who’d walked up to him, admiring his handmade ornaments and it led Aoba to wonder how exactly was Mink as a person before Toue took everything away from him.

But he had time now. _They_ had time now.

There’s no rush to discover more about each other now that they were each other’s closest support.

He stood up, walking around the couch and stood behind Mink, who looked up, just enough to catch Aoba’s cheeky grin.

“Let me help you relieve some of your exhaustion,” Aoba grinned. Placing two hands on Mink’s shoulders, he grasped them hard, all the while observing Mink’s reaction before he inputted more strength into his thumbs, nudging at where Mink’s tough muscles were.

“Are you giving me a massage?” Mink asked, voice calm and monotone.

“Huh? Yeah, I am,” Aoba was taken aback but as soon as Mink closed his eyes again, evidently trying to enjoy what Aoba was doing for him, Aoba swallowed down his throat, lifting his spirit again and pushing harder into Mink’s robust skin.

“Tell me if it hurts,” he muttered. Mink’s body was almost two times bigger than him. When he had his hands on his shoulders like this, it dawned upon him on how _small_ he seemed to be, as compared to Mink’s body shape. There’s nothing he could do about it; he only needed to work harder to compensate for the striking incompetence.

He was so focused on massaging Mink that when a strong breeze blew into the room, he let out a loud sneeze, suddenly feeling chills all over his back.

“Are you cold?” Mink’s voice broke the stretched silence. He raised both his hands, noticing how cold they were, and rubbing them together, just to have Mink raising his hand and pulling him back onto the couch, where he fell right into Mink’s embrace.

> **Cuddling / Keeping the other person warm**

Mink’s body was huge; almost twice his own size. There’s once when he felt just ever so slightly intimidated by the difference in their shapes but across time he’d come to notice that the differences didn’t play any part to how they were to interact with each other after all. Instead, there were even instances that made him feel safe, as if he was wrapped in a protection barrier, shielded from whatever threats that were threatening to harm him from the outside.

Like now.

Mink’s embrace was warm, the faint scent of cinnamon drunk him in a state of bliss. His huge arms wrapped around his body, bringing him closer as he leaned against Mink’s chest, hearing his heartbeats right by his ear.

He loved it; he loved moments like this when there wasn’t a need for too much words between them, moments like this when he could allow himself a space to breathe, doing nothing but indulging in Mink’s gentle gesture as he listened to Mink’s heartbeats.

It was slow yet pacifying moments like this that made him feel as if he was being secluded from the outside world, completely buried in a world with only Mink and himself, and be perfectly sure that Mink was both alive and strong by how he could hear his heart beating so loud and clear now.

Never did a day pass without him being grateful that Mink had chosen to live despite him having all the reasons to end his life after he’d achieved revenge with Toue. Never did a day pass without him feeling relieved to be able to support Mink by his side.

And never did a day pass without him hoping that he could always cuddle in Mink’s embrace like this, feeling how genuinely Mink had come to cherish him, and knowing that they’d have each other by their side from now on, regardless of what was to happen in the future.

> **Taking care of the other while sick**

It could be a result of his own overthinking, or his own curse, something he’d tried to convince himself ever since he woke up with a migraine and a mild fever, on his own bed. He tried to remember what happened the previous night but his memory halted at where he was cuddling in Mink’s embrace, assuming that he’d fallen asleep then. Mink had walked into the room, waking him up as he rummaged through what seemed to be a box of traditional medicines, only to have Aoba sitting up to realize he had, indeed, fallen sick.

“Mink…?” he called out through hoarse voice. His throat was sore, speaking alone made him feel as if thousands of needles were poking on his Adam Apple. But there were this depressing features on Mink’s face that he couldn’t help but wanting to reach out to him.

Was he blaming himself for the cause of Aoba’s cold?

Mink halted all of his actions, one hand holding a strong-smelling bottle of liquid, another a piece of wet cloth as he turned.

“Did you have breakfast?” Aoba asked. He didn’t intend for this question but he didn’t know what else he could ask either. All he wanted was to make sure that Mink wasn’t blaming himself for whatever it was and all he wanted was to hear Mink’s voice.

For some reason, he felt clingier than usual.

It must be his cold.

Mink heaved a heavy sigh. Putting the items back into the basket, he walked towards Aoba, sitting on the bed then placing a hand on his forehead.

“It’s still a bit warm,” he muttered, without answering Aoba’s question.

Aoba leaned against him without a word. He was addicted to Mink’s warm and despite he himself feeling warm now, there was this… magnetic attraction that had him clinging onto Mink when he’d come to close proximity.

“I’ll cook something,” Mink said, visibly noticed Aoba’s unusual behavior.

“Ah, then let’s do it together!” Aoba heightened his voice as he pulled himself away from Mink. He was almost falling asleep the more he indulged himself in Mink’s comfortable warmth, and staying in bed for the rest of the day was definitely not something he’d want to do now, even when he was physically unwell.

> **Cooking together**

His insides were burning but his fingers were cold, his toes equally so. Despite being wrapped in thick layers of blanket, dragging along the floor as he dragged his feet into the kitchen, he still trembled out of reflex, noticing that his cold might be worse than he ever thought it’d be.

He thought he needed time to get used to it; he was new in this place after all, the weather would definitely be one of the things he needed to be accustomed to, alongside the brand new culture and language he was now immersed in. The drastic change of temperature had always been his concern but there was no way he’d be able to get used to it if he didn’t experience a cold or two.

And this was definitely one of those colds that would heal in no time if he was to allow himself to overcome it.

Staying in bed for the entire day feeling like a useless piece of meat was definitely not an option.

He followed Mink into the kitchen, his nose running, his head heavy, and settled his blanket on a chair before he hurried to help Mink unload the ingredients from the cabinet.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Mink asked. He’d heated up the stove, a pot filled with water as he waited for it to boil.

Aoba nodded with a hum. He opened the door of the cabinet below the stove, looking up at Mink with questions written all over his face before Mink muttered a quick “Porridge” that he beamed and cupped a few full cups of rice into a wooden pot.

When was the last time he had porridge, though? He never had it here, so it would never know how it’d taste like. As he searched his memories, he smiled to himself as he remembered how Tae had always reprimanded him when he fell sick, similarly, with a running nose and heavy head as she fed hot spoons of porridge into his mouth. She’d always make him porridge with fish slices in it, and it’d take him a while before he could actually eat it, having to wait for it to cold down.

All he could manage at this point of time was to help Mink to keep an eye on the pot of rice boiling in high temperature water as Mink managed the vegetables, cutting them into small pieces and throwing shreds of them into the pot every once a while.

Cooking a bowl of porridge wasn’t too hard of a job. Most of the time were spent waiting for the food to cook. Occasionally, Mink would sit on the chair where Aoba would join him as he read his book, a cup of coffee ready by his side. A long stretch of minutes later, Aoba would find himself leaning his head against Mink’s arm, trying to read what he was reading before he found himself dozing off.

It was when Mink attempted to sit up that he woke, bringing himself to stand, almost toppling head first against the stove if Mink hadn’t been catching him on time, and by the time he was conscious and well aware of his surrounding, Mink was already scooping the porridge out of the pot and right into a bowl.

“Sit down,” Mink said, noticing that all Aoba had been doing was staring at his every movement. Aoba did as he was told. There was nothing much he could do anyway, standing around would only hinder Mink’s movement. But he didn’t need to wait too long before Mink returned with the bowl of porridge and a glass of water in his hand.

“It’s hot,” he said briefly as Aoba stared at the bowl. Smoke arose from the surface of the food, blurring his vision, the bright colours of green vegetable and carrots standing out from the midst of white. He gulped down his throat. As much as his stomach was already making noises, he’d need to wait until it’s a bit less hot to eat it. And more waiting time only meant a longer stretch of awkward silence, causing him to work his brain, attempting to figure out a way to loosen his uptight atmosphere.

“What is it?” Mink asked before he could open his mouth.

“Ah, no, it’s just…” he stuttered. It’s too pathetic trying to break the words as how they were rolling in his head. But he wasn’t in any condition to figure a smart way out of this anyway so instead, he gaped, staring blankly at Mink, who returned with a dismissive stare before he heard a sigh.

Then, Mink was lifting the spoon off his hand, scooping one spoonful of porridge up and started… blowing slowly.

“Mink?” Aoba asked, voice a tad higher, visibly astonished.

“It’s hot,” Mink repeated without breaking the momentum of his huffs.

That wasn’t what Aoba wanted to hear. At all. The fact that Mink was helping him with his food so that it was easier for him sent a weird pang of warmth right into his chest. It reminded him of his grandmother again, and it took a huge deal of his nerves to not break down there and then.

“Here,” Mink had pushed the spoon towards his mouth while he dwelled in nostalgia. Swallowing his emotions down, he smiled, then opening his mouth to take the spoonful of porridge into his mouth.

The temperature was just now. The food was marvellous.

It was the best taste he’d ever tasted.

“Okay?” Mink asked. He was still wearing an impassive stare but Aoba could make out the mild gentleness behind his tone of voice. He nodded feverishly, opening his mouth again just to hear a click of tongue.

“Wait.”

And while he did just that, Mink had scooped another spoonful of porridge up, repeating what he’d done earlier, leaving Aoba in a struggle to keep himself composed and to embrace this very precious moment he’d never expected to experience himself.

* * *

 

He said he was able to handle it.

He didn’t believe him.

Or that was what he thought.

It was one morning when they were greeted by rushed knocks on the door, waking both of them up with Mink scrambled off the bed first, heading towards the door with Aoba following him from the back, one knuckle rubbing his eye as he yawned.

He couldn’t remember what they were talking about; the language wasn’t something he knew of but he could make out how anxious the man outside the door was. And soon enough, when Mink closed the door, he was wearing a stern look on his face, sweeping all of Aoba’s sleepiness out of his mind.

“Mink, what’s wrong?” he asked.

“An escaped boar,” Mink said simply. Aoba followed as he stepped into the room, coming out with what seemed to be a bow and arrows that Aoba had never once seen him used before.

“Is it dangerous?” Aoba asked while Mink suited himself up, wearing the heavy equipment on his own body then putting on a coat. It’s winter now, it’s undoubtedly going to be cold.

“It’s dangerous,” Mink said, pulling the strap of his bow over his shoulder and headed towards the door. “It escaped this morning, witnesses said that they saw it running towards the forest. Consider it lucky otherwise we would have casualties to handle.”

It sounded like they’d accidentally set a beast loose.

“What type of animal is that?” Aoba asked, now completely awake.

“It’s a boar,” Mink repeated. “It’s one of the fiercer animal around here.”

“Are you going to kill it when you find it?” Aoba asked again, attempting to figure out how the treatment would be if the situation was to turn out the way he visualized.

“We can’t. But if the situation calls for it, we would have no choice but to annihilate it. Anyway, leaving it in the wild when it’s in that uncontrollable state isn’t safe for anyone.”

The word Mink used was a different level with Aoba’s. Annihilate. Does that mean that they weren’t supposed to kill anything, any animal, in the first place? Would that break any of their local rules and traditions?

“I’m coming with you,” Aoba said, hurrying towards the bedroom before Mink spoke.

“You’re not.”

“Huh?” Aoba stopped in his tracks. “But it’d be better if you have more people helping you out, right?”

“I have enough people helping me out,” Mink said, monotone. “Stay in.”

Aoba frowned. He didn’t like where this is going at all. Was Mink suggesting that he’d be nothing but a burden if he was to follow him?

Was Mink saying that he was too weak for this?

“I’m coming,” Aoba insisted. “I’m not as weak as you think I am.”

“No,” Mink confronted, tone firm. “You’re not going anywhere. Stay.”

“Mink, I—“

Mink had stormed out of the house, closing the door with such force that the echoes of it vibrated in Aoba’s ears.

“…seriously…” he muttered under his breath.

Sure, his strength was non-comparable to Mink’s but he wasn’t weak either. It wasn’t for Mink to decide what he should and should not do.

He slumped on the couch, hugging his head and he heaved a heavy sigh.

The twitch in his heart was painful, and he knew that it wasn’t stemmed from the mere fact that he couldn’t go with Mink, but of how Mink had just dismissed his strength in such an upfront way.

Was that the impression he’d left for Mink? How could Mink be so certain of what he could and could not do?

He spent the entire of his day rummaging around the house, occasionally taking some time off to work on the ornaments Mink had entrusted him. But soon, he found himself putting it aside and spacing out, eyes drifting unconsciously towards the window. It was clear when he first set eyes on it, then, gradually, it turned bright orange, then red, and eventually, greyish blue.

It’d been a whole day since Mink was out. Was it really _that_ dangerous? Was Mink okay?

His heart thumped heavily for a totally different reason. When the sky turned completely down, he surrendered to his gut feeling, standing up and approaching the window, attempting to catch sight of the faintest hint of Mink and his troop he could find.

But he saw nothing. The forest was swallowed in a sea of dark; there was no sign of fire, nor there’s any sign of movement.

He had a very bad feeling about this.

“Ren, we’re heading out,” he said, pulling his jacket as he walked, with Ren throttling closely by his side.

Walking into a forest in the dark robbed one sense of yours but heightened the others. There was no map to follow, but even if there was one the perpetual dark would only prevent one from using it. Aoba walked a certain distance into the forest, stopping occasionally as he pressed his palm against the rough bark of trees, breathing in the scent of the forest.

There were no signs of life, no signs of light, the peaceful ambience a bit too good to be true.

His hair stood at its end as he listened to the creaking of branches under his feet, walking with increased precautions as he looked around for a hint of familiarity. He’d never been in the forest at night before; the woods had suddenly become a place he never knew, even though he’d been here a couple of times. He was pretty sure that he was lost, but he no longer cared of the path to return now.

There was no meaning for him to return if he didn’t find Mink, whom he didn’t even know if he’s alive or dead.

He didn’t know how long time had passed. Ten minutes? An hour? Three hours? All that he knew was he’d been walking for the longest time now and he might have been turning round and round the same spot ever since the beginning. Every time he heard slight movement from around him he’d immediately turn around, just to find himself staring into the dark, into void.

But the next time he turned, he hoped void was all that he was staring instead.

On the crest of the hill were several silhouettes, big and wolfish. In the half-light they looked like dogs, but dogs wouldn’t move as how these creatures did. Aoba stepped an instinctive step backwards when he heard one of the wolves growl, wondering if he’d be able to outrun the wolves if he was to escape now.

The answer in his head wasn’t one he’d want to admit.

Another growl and he knew it was time for a retort, he swung his leg, kicking the nearest wolf that’d approached him, sending it flying away before he sent another attack at the next approaching beast. He was doing fine but the several silhouettes soon turned into a pack of beasts and the laboured breathing he’d experienced soon after told him enough that he wasn’t going to last any longer if they were to summon more of their own kind.

There was no other way.

Picking Ren up, he ran, as fast as he could, his breath breaking as he tumbled down the slope and heard his bone break. He endured the pain, forgotten about it, then panting as he ran again, until he saw lights in a distance through blurred eyes that he found his energy for one last dash, hitting a figure right in the chest before he looked up, suddenly finding all the terrors vanishing from his chest.

“M-Mi—“

“What are you—“ Mink’s words were cut short the moment he noticed the pack of shadows behind them. Without further delay, he picked a blade from his belt and threw towards a direction Aoba could see. He heard loud moans, then he was pushed behind, a crowd of men rushing past him as he leaned against a tree, feeling the breath leaving him and finally feeling the pain all over his body.

The fight was ferocious but the men were obviously experts. They fought skilfully, hitting the beasts with practice, rapid motion that Aoba found difficulties to lock his eyes on. By the time the commotion ended, he was already sitting limped by the tree, only looking up with weak breathing when Mink shook his shoulders ever so slightly.

He looked concerned, and he looked as if he was about to say something but all he did was stare at Aoba, escorted him up and said,

“Let’s go back.”

He no longer needed to worry if he still knew the path home. Mink was right by his side, his warmth ever so evident, his arm surrounding his shoulder a barrier keeping him safe. When they saw the familiar glint of light from their cabin, Aoba quickened his steps, feeling as if he’d finally regained his life again.

The sense of reality slowly sunk back into him when he collapsed on the couch, staring at the ceiling with blank gaze. He’d encountered a pack of _wolves_ and he was even lucky to be alive at this very moment. He couldn’t quite remember how he managed to fight his way out of the assault but he remembered the loud “ _I can’t die here_ ” voice resounding in his head when he smelled his own blood in his nose. He shivered when Mink touch where a long scratch mark was stretched along his arm, coming to himself just in time to have Mink taking his jacket off him, revealing a deep bite mark on his shoulder.

“Why did you go into the forest?” Mink’s voice was gravelly; it sounded like a low warning.

Aoba looked away. He didn’t want to continue the disagreement they’d had earlier the day, not now when he was both physically and mentally exhausted.

“Were you looking for me?” Mink pestered, just to be responded with another stretch of silence.

“I told you not to go into the forest,” Mink said, realizing that Aoba wasn’t going to answer any of his interrogations. “If you didn’t, you wouldn’t end up like this.”

Was he blaming him? Did he create more troubles for Mink? It wasn’t like he was asking for it, anyway. Rather than sitting around in the house waiting for news that he had absolutely no idea of, he’d prefer taking a risk, betting on his chance.

But Mink obviously didn’t share the same thoughts as him.

Rather, he must be thinking of him as a burden, an inconvenience, something that would only get into the way.

“I told you, I’m not weak. This is just an accident.”

The scar on his shoulder hurt, but his heart felt as if it was being stabbed by a knife.

And it hurt more.

A lot more.

“It wouldn’t happen if you didn’t go into the woods,” Mink repeated. He didn’t seem to budge, but Aoba didn’t intend to change his mind either.

“I can be of help if you just let me,” he insisted, glowered painted his features, he felt as if he didn’t say this now he’d regret it.

Mink remained silent, which only made Aoba angrier.

“You’re too protective,” he said, no longer to stop himself. “I’m can fight too, if I need to learn new skills, new language, or anything at all, I can do it. I don’t need to live in a bubble that would only have me protected in a closed zone. It…” he swallowed down his throat, his voice a tad too wavering at the end. “…it makes me feel useless…”

He wanted to say more but his words were stuck in his throat, he wasn’t sure if he was overwhelmed with anger or anguish or both. He didn’t like how he was being treated and he didn’t like to be fighting with Mink either, but there was no way he could suppress his emotions now that he was at the perk of exploding.

He didn’t know how to feel.

“I don’t want to be a burden,” his scowled deepened as he heightened his voice at Mink. “I don’t like to be treated like this. I _hate_ being treated like I can’t do anything at all!”

He took a deep breath but all Mink did was staring at him, at a completely loss for words.

“I’m not weak, Mink!” Aoba said. “I’m sorry if I give you that impression but let me tell you this – _I can be of help_ and I—“

Before he could finish what he wanted to say, Mink had pulled him into a hug, having his face to lean against his chest and pushing all of his words down his throat.

It’s unfair; the familiar scent on him, the warmth he was so every addicted. It’s unfair for Mink to shut his thoughts and his words in such a simple gesture. It’s unfair how Mink could get rid of whatever overpowering emotions that was devouring him, calming him down like this like it was the most natural thing to do.

He _hated_ how Mink was his biggest weakness.

“I didn’t want you to get hurt,” Mink muttered. “But I’m being too inconsiderate.”

He _hated_ how Mink could clear things up so easily like that. He hated how he could forgive him so easily like that.

He hated how Mink never come to realize how _considerate_ he was, despite how he depicted himself as being the opposite.

But above all, he hated how much he’d fallen for this man there was no way he could hold any other negative feelings towards him, regardless of how frustrated he was with the way he did things.

And he would fight with him, only if that meant he could fight for a better future for the both of them.

 

 


	97. Delayed Heat [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are more than one ways to remember what one does, even when they themselves don’t.

His hips hurt.

His head is burning.

He’s sticky and there’s this burning sensation in between his legs that’d told him more than enough of exactly _why_ he’s feeling this way.

He snaps a glare by his side, frowning when he notices how Noiz is sleeping in such a pacifying manner it’s as if none of the aches and sores on his body means anything to him. He sighs out loud as he turns himself over, rubbing his temple with his thumb upon feeling the heaviness of his head, accompanied by intense throbbing.

It’s hard to even mutter a single word. His throat seems to have gone through some sort of excruciating torture the night before and it hurts to feel vibration running through it, as if needles are planted in it and poking on his Adam ’s apple whenever he does as much as trying to breathe a word out.

He gives up. Merely following the motion of the turning ceiling fan above him, he listens to the quiet striking of the clock. What time is it, anyway? And what time did they return home to previous night? The last his memory serves him, he was in a high-class restaurant with Noiz, celebrating their 2nd anniversary, and he remembers telling Noiz that he doesn’t need to drink too much, too flustered to even mention his low alcohol tolerance, but he _also_ remembers how Noiz had curved a suspicious smirk at him, pouring red wine into his glass every moment he finishes one.

And… that’s about it.

He’s _sure_ that he’s been drunk; but what terrifies him the most is the completely blank piece of memory in his head that’s supposed to be yesterday’s night – one that he could not remember _at all_ and one that he needs to depend on this very person sleeping right by his side to recall.

He trembles out of reflex when he feels movement by his side, looking sideway just to see Noiz turning around, his eyes half-opened, his grin all the more prominent.

“Get up…” says Aoba through hoarse voice. Does he really want to know what happened yesterday? Maybe yes, maybe no. He’s frustrated that he has absolutely no recollection of what happened but his gut feeling also tells him that whatever Noiz is going to tell him will burn his intestines raw.

“That’s so cold,” Noiz smirks higher. He wraps an arm around Aoba’s waist, pulling him close before he presses dry lips against Aoba’s burning cheek. “I miss the you yesterday when you cried my name and begged me to—“

“Woah, s-stop right there.” His throat still hurts, but the mental images Noiz is giving him is threatening to push him into yet another state of unconsciousness.

“You don’t remember anything?” Noiz muttered against the corner of his lips, a kiss Aoba is expecting but never comes.

He doesn’t. But is he going to tell Noiz, though?

Yet, Noiz doesn’t need him to tell him _anything_ at all to know the answer. His hand wanders along his collarbone, feeling goosebumps from Aoba as he plants slow, delicate kisses all over his neck. Aoba’s body burns again; despite his vague memory, his body seems to remember _everything_ that had happened when he’s not as half sane as Noiz was the previous night. His body remembers Noiz’s skillful touches on his body, it remembers the texture of Noiz’s skin, the suggestive trace of _want_ he marks on every inch of Aoba’s body. He doesn’t dislike it. And he hitches a breath upon feeling Noiz’s finger near his hole, almost moaning out loud when he feels one finger dipping into it if not because of the sore on his throat.

“It’s still wet. We should clean up,” Noiz breaths, heat course the whole of Aoba’s neck, where Noiz is leaning his face against. “Or do you want another round?”

He thought he’d faint right there and then. But yet, he lurches himself towards Noiz, sucking on his lips, trying to _remember_ how he did it last night – how he’d clung onto Noiz and felt those lips on his own, how he’d guided Noiz’s hand to his sensitive spots like he does now, and how they spilled moans into each other mouths, licking on each other tongues, wanting to feel each other the best they could with everything they have.

And how they’d eventually end up in more and more lovemaking sessions as long as their bodies permit them.

His defective memory has always been a huge letdown in his life; he hates not being able to remember everything, he hates the missing pieces in his head. But at times like this, he’s reminded of how he’s not alone, that his body would help him remember, that _people_ around him will help him remember.

And maybe, he’s fine with that. And he’ll be fine with that.


	98. My First [Aoba, Ren]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He didn’t need a friend. Maybe a partner. But not a friend.

He wasn’t quite sure why he picked the puppy up. He could’ve chosen a better Allmate, at least one that could help him greatly in Rhyme. But all he had gotten himself was a worn-out blue-colored puppy, one that he found in the trash and one that had made him reconsider his life decision all over again.

But there was just… _something_ about the said puppy that had halted his steps when the blue-colored fur entered his line of sight. He found himself completely perplexed, unable to pull his gaze away from the wounded dog and the next thing he knew, he was already approaching it, squatting down as he flicked a finger against one of the disheveled furs. The sensation felt soft against his skin. He hesitated for a few moments before he placed the whole of his hand on the unconscious puppy, feeling nothing but coldness and dampness before he ultimately reached both of his hands out and carried the puppy into his arms.

He was _still_ not quite sure of why he was doing this as he made his way back home. The puppy was lifeless in his arms and frequently, he’d look at him, as if attempting to garner a tiny hint of life from him before he gave up, speeding up his pace and was already panting heavily when he reached his own house.

He was almost glad that his grandmother was at home that time.

“I want him.” He’d told his grandmother when Tae shot him a curious look right after he’d shown him the puppy.

And right after he spelled his intention out at Tae, he still had no idea what had made him do so.

And so that was it. Before he knew it, he was sitting in his room, surrounded by tools he’d borrowed from his grandmother. He took one more glance at the puppy, carefully caressing his fur before he straightened himself up, picking the puppy up and attempting to locate his power source. When he found it, he took another look at the puppy’s features again, as if asking his permission to open him up. It was another few awkward seconds before he finally opened the opening that led him to where the main system of the Allmate was.

He knew _nothing_ about fixing an Allmate, let alone an old model like this one in particular. He felt his heart sink the moment he figured out what troubles he’d brought upon himself. But one shake of head was all he needed to pick himself up again. There was no way he would give up now; it was not like him and he definitely didn’t want to abandon his effort, especially not when he’d taken all the troubles to bring this Allmate back.

It took an entire week for him to fix the Allmate, even refusing his grandmother’s offer to help when she asked. But the moment the Allmate was finally booted up, he let out a broad grin, one that he’d found himself missing all this while. The puppy blinked - once, twice - and when he sat up, he shifted slight back, unsure of what to do.

For a long while, they merely stared at each other. And after a long distressed hour, the puppy made its way towards him, placing his front paws on his legs as he wagged his tail, eyes filled with unmistakable excitement.

“Hi,” he said awkwardly. “I’m Aoba.”

He hoped it was a good enough introduction but the way the puppy had nuzzled its cheek against Aoba’s leg right after told him that it was, in fact, more than enough for him.

He didn’t know how to train an Allmate, he wasn’t even sure if this particular Allmate was good enough for a Rhyme match. But he interacted with him nevertheless; he taught him how to walk, he configured his system once a while, even designing his online form by himself. He didn’t expect too much from the Allmate, let alone having him being a trusted partner. All he ever wanted was company and he trusted this new friend of his to be able to give him the reassurance he wanted.

The day the puppy spoke the first word to him had caught him completely off guard. It was nothing too fancy, just _one word_ and it was more than enough for Aoba to stare, wide-eyed, at the dog, as if he’d heard something so impossibly out-of-the-world that he stuttered, almost thinking if he was hearing things.

“ _Aoba.”_

He wasn’t sure what was making him feel so incredibly awkward like this but the moment he held the dog up, stared into his eyes, he instantly felt as if he was looking at something so sinfully alluring that he was almost doubting if he had been making the right decision picking this Allmate back home for himself.

But as he embraced the puppy in his arms, burying his head in the fur that was his Allmate’s warmth at the same time, he thought that perhaps this was meant to be after all - and that perhaps, this was what he was waiting for his entire life: a companion, partner, and someone he could wholly trust all at once.


	99. Surprise? [Ren x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He doesn’t want to be right. Not now, at all times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I beg of you, do not investigate that noise.”

Ren’s presence was a complete blessing to the Seragakis. Despite the fact of how time was needed for the truth to properly sink into people around them, Ren had been adapting well, his motions getting better with time, his interaction less awkward. It came as a shock, but across time, everyone who’d known him since he was an AllMate had come to recognize how this Ren was the same Ren they were always familiar with, and Aoba, above everyone else, was more that grateful to know how he was being treated the same way – some even better – than how he was usually being attended to, conveniently brushing Ren’s concern aside and allowing him to blend in with the human society, more than he could ever when he was simply an AllMate.

Everyone aside, there was no way Aoba could deny the fact that he himself was also taking time to get used to Ren’s now… bigger presence by his side. He would still jump a tad when he heard his name, called by a familiar voice, just to see a grown-up man, standing right in front of him, with face as flat as a poker. Nevertheless, Aoba could also not deny how he was enjoying every moment he was to spend with Ren; teaching him new things, observing the tiniest change of expression on his face, and the still puppy-like gesture Ren would push on him was also something that endeared Aoba to no end. He’d find heat blooming on his cheeks when Ren licked him on the cheek after telling him that he had food by his lips. He’d reprimand him, telling him that all Ren needed to do was tell him and that was all. But, in the next second, the moment Ren was to pull an obviously letdown expression, even having Aoba to see imaginary pair of drooping ears on his head, he felt whatever embarrassment he had within him disappearing into thin air.

Ren was his biggest weakness, even without he himself realizing so. Ren knew absolutely everything of him, something that was all too natural for him. It was a fatal disadvantage to Aoba, but also the sweetest comfort he could ever obtain from his now-boyfriend, knowing that Ren was the sole person he could ever depend and trust upon, but yet also the only person who had his greatest fear and control in his very hands.

Snuggling in bed was a past time both of them genuinely enjoyed. Oftentime, Aoba would head to shower right after dinner, telling Ren to stay still in the room while he throttled right into the bathroom, pressing his back against the door and instantly regretting the shameless, upfront act he’d just done. Ren was inexperienced in practically every single area. He treated Aoba as how he always would – telling him when he was running too fast, reminding him of things that he might have potentially forgotten – but there were also times when he would sit around, fidgeting, visibly uncomfortable, until Aoba asked him if he wanted to cuddle. He was oblivious to his own feelings, even not realizing them at most times. He never knew what ‘jealousy’ was, and ‘being in heat’ was a concept he was greatly confused with. It was often when they shared heat, when Aoba took the lead, guided him, and told him that it’s okay to do whatever he wanted that he noticed how dangerous this very desire was.

He’d never felt this way towards Aoba when he was Aoba’s AllMate. But he was more than Aoba’s AllMate now, and despite himself not being familiar with it, he wanted to get used to it just so he could make Aoba feel good as much as he deserved it.

Hence, there were times like this when Aoba would initiate it. He’s always subtle, but that’s the best he could do. And he’d always pray that Ren would get the hint, before he needed to spell it out loud and triggering more awkwardness out of them than he already did.

Steam filled the room as he cut the shower on. He bathed slowly, the heat surrounding him did nothing to calm the warmth building in from the inside. After ensuring that he was composed enough to take the next step, he dried himself, paced out of the room, water dripping from his wet hair as he approached Ren, who was sitting on the bed, flipping what seemed to be a storybook Aoba had borrowed him.

“Aoba,” he called out upon noticing Aoba, placing the book on the bedside table as he did.

“Were you reading?” Aoba asked the obvious question, responded by a nod from Ren.

“Aoba, come here,” Ren said. He moved a tad, tapping at the empty space by his side.

Aoba obeyed. His slightly damped back stuck against his shirt, his body temperature rose once again upon feeling Ren’s scent. He was nuzzling Aoba on the cheek, poking his face with the tip of his nose, his eyes closed, seemingly enjoying the pleasant smell of Aoba fresh from shower.

“Aoba smells nice,” he mumbled, voice low, yet extremely enticing.

“W-well, I just got out of the shower after all,” Aoba stuttered. His cold skin was quick to be smeared by a layer of heat from Ren’s delicate action. He leaned against him, pressing their foreheads together then gazed right into Ren’s eyes with a small yet naughty smile on his face.

“Granny is going to be late,” he whispered.

Ren nodded. “Tae-san said that she has a community meeting to attend to.”

“Uhuh,” Aoba responded. “We have some time.”

Across the many times that they’d make love, Ren had slowly but surely come to recognize what Aoba meant when he threw vague hint like this. He swallowed down his throat, pressing his palm against Aoba’s cheeks and rubbed the tips of their noses together.

“Aoba,” he breathed, low, but needy. It was Aoba whom had ultimately slanted himself closer, brushing their lips together, and it was Ren whom had pressed them harder, urging for more, yearning for more.

Their makeout was usually slow, as if they wanted to take their own time tasting each other, feeling each other, and wanting to confirm that they still had each other by their side, that their existence was real.

Ren caressed Aoba’s cheek with delicate brushes that had Aoba spilling an unintentional giggle. He inched nearer towards Ren, was about to straddle onto his laps when they heard a loud thump from downstair, immediately causing them to spring away from each other.

“W-what was that?” Aoba asked, wide-eyed.

“No idea,” Ren said. He shifted his gaze to the door, allowing a momentary stretch of silence before he stood, just to be pulled back by Aoba.

“I beg you, do not investigate that noise.”

“Aoba?”

Aoba gazed at his room’s door, his Adam Apple bobbing up and down. Cold sweat ran through his back, a chilly sensation travelled down his spine. Tae was not supposed to be home yet, and even if she was, they’d hear her coming in from the front door.

Definitely not making such a huge ruckus like what they’d just heard.

“It could be a thief,” Ren contemplated.

It’d better be a thief, not something else, Aoba wondered to himself.

“Aoba?” Ren called out again, noticing the lack of response from Aoba.

“L-let’s check it out then,” Aoba said cautiously. He stood from the bed, searching around the room for anything that he could use as a weapon, and left the room with Ren, following him closely from the back with a bat in his hand.

The lights were off in the living room, their footsteps creating creaking sounds as they walked down the stairs. Nothing seemed to be out of place, which was unusual if it really was a thief who had created the sound just now. The more they ventured into the space, the more Aoba felt his own shivers. Something wasn’t quite right, and now of all times, he never wanted his hunch to be true.

“R-Ren…?” he whispered, his voice breaking the silence in the room. “I think we’re good. No thief. Let’s go back.”

“But what was the sound just now?” Ren persisted, still sniffing around the room for some sort of hint. “Something must have dropped.”

“Maybe it’s from the neighbour,” Aoba convinced. “Doesn’t seem like anything’s out of place here.”

Ren kept quiet, still had his eyes stuck in every corner of the room he could make out of.

“Aoba,” he called suddenly, causing Aoba to grasp onto his arm out of surprise.

“W-what?”

“Look over there.”

He followed where Ren was pointing, feeling white flashing past his eyes the moment he realized what Ren was implying: it looked like smoke, but the layer of white was too thick, flowing in a too-stable way to be considered as one. He felt his voice trapped in his throat. He should run, but it’s the only thing he couldn’t bring himself to do, and all he did was staring at the floating material, until another loud sound vibrated that it disappeared, as if it wasn’t there in the first place.

“What was that…?” he voiced out after a brief silence.

“I don’t know,” Ren said.

“But you saw it, right?”

“I did.”

He didn’t want to be right. He never wanted to be right for this kind of thing. At all.

“Let’s just go back,” he said at long last. Completely ignoring Ren’s sign of protest, he gripped onto his wrist and hauled him back to his room, closing the door behind them then immediately crashing on the bed.

He had absolutely no clue of what had happened just now but he didn’t want to think too much about it. He felt colder than when he first came out of the shower, even though his body and his hair were completely dry now. And it was when Ren leaned against him, hugging him from the back, having his chest pressed against his back that he felt safer feeling Ren’s heartbeats against his skin.

This is simply a bad dream, he attempted to convince himself. Maybe he was simply thinking too much, maybe he was simply too tired.

And maybe it was because of that that he was hearing voices – one that was telling him of that he no longer needed to worry about his deceased brother, and that he was now in a better place.


	100. Just A Poke [Desire x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s nothing amazing, just a normal day, a simple intention. But of course, nothing is ever simple when he is involved.

There were a lot of things that Desire never knew. He’d acted impulsively most of the times, living completely up to his name, and when it came to a time that blending into the society he was residing in became a necessity, he found himself frowning at the tiniest adjustment he had to make, realizing that his sense of reality was never what he ever thought after all. Common sense wasn’t something he lacked, but self-restraint was, and Aoba had come to deem it as his responsibility to ensure that he didn’t get into trouble just from driving himself around with the instincts in his veins. Desire was… some sort like an innocent child; he acted as if he owned the world, as if nothing in this world could harm him. He behaved just like any other man, just more reckless, and more arrogant.

He was the complete opposite of Aoba; but yet, he was _Aoba_ , and there was no way Aoba could deny his own reflection whenever he was to come to close proximity with Desire.

He had no idea whatsoever of how he should interact with Desire, and of course, he had no idea whatsoever with why Desire would treat him a certain way he never expected. But at most times, he’d take it as it is, observing quietly as Desire figured his own way out, then proceeded to give him the best support he needed, regardless if he was to accept it or not.

And sometimes, he’d find his jaw dropping at the actions Desire committed – like today, when he brought back a whole bag of what seemed like small boxes of food, then dumped it onto their bed.

“What’s that?” Aoba asked, trying to peek at the bag of food.

“Don’t know,” Desire responded briefly. Slumping himself on the bed, he started unpacking the food, taking one out to have Aoba finally realizing what it really was.

“Ah, it’s today, huh?” Aoba grinned. He inched towards Desire, all the while wearing a naughty smirk on his face as he unpacked more of the similar items from the bag. “Where did you get this?”

Desire fell silent, and when Aoba looked up at him, he noticed he was wearing what seemed like a irked face, his eyebrows knitted together as he pouted.

It was… cute.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Noiz,” Desire said.

“Did you ask these from him or did he give them to you by himself?”

“…I asked.”

If there’s one thing Aoba absolutely love about Desire, was how oblivious he seemed to be towards his own feelings and actions that he would never realize how endearing he could seem to be from the tiny things he did out of his own instinct.

“And do you know what these are?” Aoba persisted, trying not to laugh too hard at the way Desire was obviously giving out a difficult-looking expression. He was him, he understood completely of how he felt now, and it was one of those times where he could find no words to describe how he was actually feeling –

– while Aoba understood completely.

“These are called Pockys,” Aoba chortled, finally putting an end to this suffering conversation. ‘And it’s Pocky’s Day today.”

“What do people do on Pocky’s Day?” Desire asked, his frown softened, his eyes gleamed with genuine curiosity.

“Nothing much,” Aoba said, unpacking one of the Pockys and pulled one stick out of it. “We just eat Pocky.”

“Heh,” Desire lifted a smirk, one that Aoba hadn’t been expecting. “That’s all?”

“T-that’s all,” Aoba swallowed down his throat.

He didn’t have a good feeling about this…

“Hmmm,” Desire hummed. He picked up one of the boxes, pulling one stick out and bit on the tip of it off. “…sweet.”

“Haha, well, it’s a snack after all, of course it’d be sweet,” Aoba replied. He took one stick off the box Desire had opened, was about to bite on it when his wrist was gripped, his action halted.

“Huh?”

“Well, I’m interested to know which is sweeter, though.” Desire wore a grin that could only suggest nothing but a naughty intention and soon enough, the pocky stick in Aoba’s hand was pushed towards Desire’s mouth, his hand pushed away, another tip guided to his own mouth.

“Wha–” Aoba started, voice muffled from the item clipped in between his lips.

Desire never waited, he bit on the stick, immediately causing Aoba to bite on the other end just to sustain the balance. Seeing that, Desire lifted a higher smirk, speeding up his biting, having Aoba to do the same out of reflex and it didn’t take too long for them to finally come into close proximity with each other, their eyes buried in each other’s depths, their lips just inches apart.

The pocky stick only a tad left, and it would only take one bite to consume the rest of it.

The question was – who would be taking the bite?

Aoba was staring intensely at him, as if expecting him to take the next move. While Desire was portraying a sort of dismissive, almost playful stare. He clearly knew that he was pushing Aoba to the edge of his nerves, yet, he took his own time, enjoying every inch of Aoba’s reaction. The time between them stretched unbelievably long, every second felt like an hour, then, while Aoba was about to move, Desire took the lead, clinging his arms around Aoba’s neck and pushed the remaining Pocky stick into Aoba’s mouth, together with his tongue.

“Mph… !”

The hard material of the stick poked him on the tongue, Desire’s aggressive sucking and licking that came right after crushing it into bits and the next thing he knew, his own tongue was encircling Desire’s, tasting the crust of the stick, tasting the remaining of the chocolate flavour on each other tongues, and by the moment he came back to himself, their bodies were already pressed against each other, arms clinging around each other’s necks, totally forgotten about the fact of how they were simply, innocently, eating chocolate sticks together on the bed.

“Hmm,” Desire hummed into Aoba’s mouth, his hand stroking Aoba’s collarbone, tracing the neat line down to his tailbone, where he slipped his hand into Aoba’s pants, immediately drawing a harsh moan out of Aoba.

“W-wait,” Aoba panted, saliva dripping from the corner of his mouth as he tried to make sense of the scorching heat fogging his brain.

“No,” Desire shot. “I’ve waited long enough.”

His jeans was pulled off in swift motion, his moans lingered in the air as he struggled for air. Desire was good – he was _terrifyingly_ good. He knew how to bring the best pleasure into Aoba, this pump on his dick was skilled, poking on sensitive spots that would never fail to push Aoba’s ecstasy into the next level.

Desire was… _so good_.

“Ah… wait, A-Ao–” His remaining word was forced down his throat when Desire crouched, chest laying flat against the bed as he took the whole of Aoba’s erected dick into his mouth.

“This,” he mumbled, sending intense vibration all over Aoba’s length. “Tastes way better than anything else.”

And it didn’t take Aoba long to realize that this Pocky Day was more than just a simply poke. Because no one poke of Desire’s would ever stop him from feeling more than just another teasing intention.


	101. Before Goodnight [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing beats the last voice you hear before you fall asleep, because you know that you’ll be safe, and you’ll be for a long time.

It was a routine they’d come to embrace, regardless of how late, or how much time they’d need from each other. Every evening when Noiz returned, it would start with a mutual greeting, a kiss on the cheek, then on the lips, and the fragrance of home cook food, accompanied by a good few minutes of snuggling against each other to complete the coming home routine. It took another good hour of eating, another good hour of showering – sometimes together, sometimes of their own – to find themselves cuddling on the couch, or on the bed, rambling about their day, speaking about things that never mattered much.

Today, they found themselves on the bed, heads propped against the bedhead, as Aoba recounted the good ol’ moments of having coffee in the cafe Theo recommended, which they now frequent. He laughed at the awkward stare the waitress had given him when he pronounced just one word wrong, and pouted when he was reminded of how he had to spend extra for a few bucks of miscalculations. Noiz had his chance to speak; his words were little, but enough for Aoba to get an idea. And while Aoba carried on with his rambles, he felt a soft thump on his shoulder, turning around just to see Noiz with his eyes closed, quiet snores resounding from his lips, his breathing calm.

“You should have told me if you’re tired,” Aoba managed a bitter smile. He pulled the blanket up, covering most of Noiz’s body, and slung an arm around his boyfriend’s neck, bringing him closer.

“You’ve worked hard today. Have a good rest,” he mumbled, closing his eyes as he did. He should probably shift Noiz into a better sleeping position, then he could return to his own room, sleep in his own bed, and greet Noiz again the next morning when they both were to prepare for another new day.

But Noiz weight felt so comfortable on his arm; his warmth so soothing, his scent so addicting. His body disobeying his mind, he simply allowed him to be, stroking the strands of his silky blond tips as he drifted off to sleep, already thinking about what breakfast to make for the both of them when they woke later. 

He could see Ren in his head – _one Ren, two Rens, three Rens_  – while his hand slid from Noiz’s head to his shoulder, falling loosely against Noiz’s torso. He was tired himself, and he laughed at how he’d just reprimanded Noiz for not noticing his own fatigue. Their surrounding quiet, they warmth all they needed to provide them with the comfort they need, and when he felt a soft peck against his cheek, he thought he’d finally drifted to sleep, just so feel a tighter hug around his body, waking him up and opening his eyes, Noiz’s pair of misty lime-green eyes being the first thing he saw.

“Forgot to say…” Noiz mumbled. He was visibly half-conscious; he probably wasn’t even aware of what he was doing. But he propped up nevertheless, kissing Aoba on the lips, then pulling both of them into a proper laying position as they nestled under the warm blanket together.

“Goodnight.”

It was soft, but it was all Aoba needed to kiss Noiz on the forehead, caressing the back of his head as he surrendered into the embrace of his young boyfriend.

“Goodnight,” he mumbled.

It was a routine they’d come to embrace. Regardless of how exhausted they’d be, this would be the time together they insisted on, and also the time they’d spend on each other, until the last thing they were to see were each other’s sleeping faces, in each other’s arms.


	102. As Light As Feather [Noiz x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Touch me, gently. Be one with me.

If he could still feel sensations on his hair, would he be able to still touch it like this? The simple twirling of a few loose strands around his fingers, the soft kissing of the tips, the silky sensations that he was so very much fond of; everything was more than just a sensation, everything was more than just a feeling on the skin. He loved every ounce of expression he could see on Aoba’s face – the small curves on the corners of his lips whenever he was to touch him on a sensitive spot on the ribs, the misty shade in his eyes they encapsulated all the wants he had for him. He’d come to know or words very well, he’d come to know when to say the right thing.

He’d come to hit Noiz on the right spot, on the right time, all the time.

“Noiz…”

A simple call of name. Nothing too extraordinary, just soft, just right, and all just enough to crush his endurance wall, to push him into a limit he never thought he had. He was weak – Aoba was his weakness, Aoba never knew, but Aoba was good at pushing his limits, and he’s good at falling into his trap.

His hands were enough to hold the whole of Aoba’s body, their chests pressed against each other, just nice, just enough to feel each other’s heart against their skin. He breathed in the faint scent of Aoba, the faint scent of love, of happiness, and of everything he thought he never deserved.

And he wondered how much more could he feel Aoba like this? How much deeper can he plunge himself into him to make him truly his?

He wondered if the ecstasy both of them shared was a reality too good to be true? He wondered if this was simply a borrowed time that was never real?

But it only took Aoba one pat on his head, one kiss on his cheek, another call of his name, to brush all the thoughts off.

Aoba was here, in his arms, his expressions varied yet exposed. And he knew he was probably thinking about the same thing, because he was wearing this smile on his face, cheeks tinted with red, yet the glow of happiness so vividly stunning.

He kissed him, deeply, desperately. Feeling him to the core, wanting to melt into him, to become one with him.

But little did he know that they were already one.

And they would be one for a very, very long time still.


	103. Ecstasy [Koujaku x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is my world of ecstasy, our world of ecstasy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written in second person POV. Bad End write.

_Drip, drip_. The quiet sound of dripping water you are so familiar with. You lie in bed, thinking about nothing, thinking about everything, wondering when would the world be wiped off, wondering when you would see light at the end of the tunnel. Everywhere you catch sight of is a pure bliss of white, of deceiving peace, of everything everyone hoped for. But you know, you always know – this is not the sound of peace, never a sight of tranquility. This is a deception, a plan you are part of.

 

You lift a smirk. You never wanted to be part of this plan but here you are, being _you_ , being engulfed in white from head to toe, being worshipped, being a person of terror. You know you are just a tool, you know you are created for purposes you never want to be part of. But you are here now, alive, moving, _taking control_.

You sit up. You don’t need to tell the time, anytime is a good time. You create the sense the time, you decide your own will. So you stand, taking light steps towards the door, as if you are floating, as if you are simply sliding pass the corridor. Everyone you encounter dare not meet your eyes; they keep their heads low, their voice small, and your eyes glint at the hint of terror they feel towards you. Why are they afraid in the first place? you always wonder. They hold no significance to you, you will never bother about them.

You never bother about anyone, no one but _him_.

When you walk down the staircase, you smell the familiar scent of rust, of lust, and you have to swallow down your throat, just so you are able to contain yourself. What would the other you feel knowing that you have drown to this extent? What would he say to you? What would he do to stop you?

You shake your head. Just a tad.

It doesn’t matter anymore, isn’t it? He’s not here anymore. He’s not going to feel anything. He’s not going to say anything. And he certainly isn’t going to do anything to stop you.

This time belongs to the _both of you_ and you know it very well.

_He_ knows it very well too.

You can see him lifting his head, his eyes looking into yours when you near the cell. Your heart beats stridently in your ears, your blood boiling in ecstasy, in anticipation, wanting to take a closer step towards where he’s sitting.

Ah… you wonder. He’s as beautiful as he always is – that striking red of his hair a piece of flame, as if it’d burn you if you do as much as touch it. His eyes, his _blood-red eyes_ look at you as if he’s looking at a prey. He wants you, you can feel it in your veins, your body knows it all too well, your _desire_ knows it all too well.

You open the door of the cell, taking light steps into it. He’s growling, saliva drips onto the floor, blood from wounds from the last time you share intercourse with him trails along his sturdy muscles.

_Drip, drip_. It’s the sound of dripping water again. But this is different. This suggests no peace, no bliss, but ecstasy, _pain_.

“Koujaku…”

You crouch, coming to the same eye level as the beast, sensing the oh-so familiar hint of struggle in his eyes. You love it, you love that stare, you love how he’s rejecting yet accepting you all the same.

Because he knows who you are. He knows who you _really are_.

“A…o…”

You don’t let him finish his words. You lurch forward, taking his words away, forcefully, desperately. You don’t need those words anymore. He doesn’t need it either.

It’s a truth you no can no longer deny. And as long as both of you are still drown in this ecstatic world, everything is fine.

Yeah, everything will be fine.


	104. Changed, Unchanged [Mink x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s more than one place that he could call his home – and this time, he’d like to call it their home.

_“Let’s go back together.”_

It still felt surreal – the promise they made, the wish he thought was too much to ask for. But Mink responded with such causality, such sincerity that Aoba had to take a step back to reconsider if it was really alright for him to ask for something like this.

Was Mink even prepared to return to Midorijima with him? Was he being too unreasonable? His qualms must have shown on his face because on the very night after Mink had given him the green light, he found Mink grasping onto his wrist before he could return to his own room, then in the next second, he was on Mink’s lap, feeling a head leaning against his shoulder.

“When do you want to go back?” Mink asked. He must be surprised how Aoba no longer brought it up since they mentioned it, or perhaps he’d come to notice the hesitations on Aoba’s face ever since they came home.

Instead of answering, Aoba turned around, coming face-to-face with Mink and cupped his face.

“Are you sure you’re okay with it?” he asked. He’d learned how to deal with Mink, and he’d come to know how bringing the question right into each other’s face was the best way for them to confront each other.

“Fine,” Mink responded simply. “I’ve been thinking about it myself,” he added, as if to emphasize his point. “But you brought it up first, which is fine.”

Aoba’s eyes brightened. Mink had been… thinking about it himself? Did he already have the intention to return to Midorijima with him even if Aoba wasn’t going to bring it up?

“So it’s fine,” Mink repeated. “Let’s go back together.”

It’s more than just obeying to Aoba’s request. Aoba could see it in his eyes – how the glint of it wavered just a tad when he spelled the last of his words out. He’s always like this, so deep in his own thoughts, so light with his words.

But it’s fine, Aoba thought as he leaned in, brushing their lips together then feeling a deeper kiss engulfing his conscious into nothingness. It’s only a matter of time before he found out what it really was, after all.

* * *

If he was to say that he’s completely calmed with the idea of returning, it’d be a huge lie he told himself – one that Mink would definitely not miss. He was way too edgy over everything he was supposed to prepare for his trip back home. But he wasn’t the only one. Ever since he broke the news to Tae, their calls had become more frequent than usual; texts reminding him of everything he could’ve forgotten flooded his mailbox every morning when he checked it, accompanied by Mink’s apprehensive stare that made him feel as if he was really making too huge of a fuss out of this.

He hadn’t been home since forever anyway; a year, to be exact. And above all, this wasn’t just a casual trip back home – it was a resolution made to clear things up with each other, a trip made to tie loose ends, especially for Mink, who’d left without a word.

“I think we have everything ready,” Aoba mumbled, counting the luggage on the floor as a frown was drawn in between his eyebrows. After much considerations, they’d decided that they weren’t going to bring too many things back, especially when they’d be walking for quite some distance to get home. But that somehow had turned into a sort of extra pressure of Aoba, having him to constant worry if he’d forgotten to pack anything with him.

“It’s only three days,” Mink reassured. It was a constraint of his work; he wouldn’t be able to let himself off for too long especially now when yearend was creeping in.

Aoba sighed. “I guess we could buy again if we happen to forget anything.”

With a reassuring smile, Mink slung an arm around his shoulders, a gesture of comfort, before he said,

“We need rest.”

That’s what he said, but definitely not what Aoba heard.

Both of them went into Mink’s room without needing the other to ask, the cold breeze having them to cuddle each other firmer under the blankets.

“Mink…” Aoba called out, wanting to confirm, to ask.

“Hm?”

He chuckled. “Nothing.”

A soft kiss on his forehead, then another on his kiss was all he needed to know that Mink had gotten what he wanted to say loud and clear. And despite the freezing wind blowing through their window, they definitely felt nothing of cold, but warm, and a lighter weight in their chests.

* * *

He took the plane before. Of course he did. It was his first and it was scary and he wasn’t sure how he managed to survive that experience when he’d travelled thousands of miles just to reach where Mink was. Swarmed by past memories, he swallowed down his throat, grasping hard onto the handles of his chair before he felt a hand on top of his. Mink looked as impassive as usual, but that’s precisely how Aoba had come to understand him. He took a deep breath, turning his hand around so that they could intertwine their fingers together, then throwing a perky grin at Mink’s direction.

“We’re going home,” he said, for a lack of better things to say.

Mink merely nodded, but the smile he gave Aoba right after made him feel how grateful he had Mink by his side this time, no longer having to travel all by himself.

The plane ride was exhaustingly long. It took a toll on their bodies, but not as much as how it made them feel emotionally tired. With the few conversations they exchanged throughout the ride, alongside Mink’s consistent pesters for Aoba to sleep, all that had been in their thoughts was how they could bring themselves to meet their old pasts again.

Across time, Aoba had gotten used to staying in Mink’s hometown. He’s pretty much accustomed to the green surrounding, to small towns and friendly people, and how everything was so hands-on it made him feel out of place once a while whenever he was to flash his Coil out. But now, after everything he’d been through, they were on their way back to Midorijima – where everything began and ended.

He inhaled deeply the moment they stepped into the airport. Platinum Jail was no longer how they remembered it to be. It’s now packed with people from different walks of life, filled with laughter and life and everything of how a normal city should be. He gazed afar, catching sight of Oval Tower, reminded of how he thought he’d lost Mink there as he clutched firmer on Mink’s hand.

“Let’s go,” he heard Mink say. This wasn’t the worse yet. He’s engulfed in a sort of mixed emotions that made him want to cry and laugh all at the same time.

It’s amazing how one year can change a place, a person; everything. It’s amazing how he felt as if everything he’d gone through being like a dream when he walked his once-familiar path back to where he once belonged. It’s amazing how one decision of his turned out to change his entire life, bringing him to where he was now and having him to reconsider if everything he’d lived through in the past was merely a dream.

Was Seragaki Aoba still the same person as he was now that he’d returned to his hometown? Did he change at all? Was he like Mink, who returned to be who he really was when he was back in his home? Would Mink still be the same Mink now that they’ve stepped into a place where every other memory they held towards it was simply a mix of anguish and bliss?

Everything felt new to him, yet none of whatever they were to face was new. As they walked along the streets of Midorijima, Aoba couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed over everything that he caught sight of. It was nostalgic – the sight of the street, the colourful brilliant colours that was what he so very fond of, and above all, the hustles and bustles of busy people, a sight he never got to see in Mink’s hometown.

They walked the path like it was the most natural course for them. He’d told Tae that he’d reach around evening, and Tae had mentioned that she would come over to the airport to greet him just for Aoba to tell her that there’s no need for her to trouble herself like this and that he could walk his own way back home.

He thought he needed time for himself to finally face Tae, personally, after the long separation since he departed to search for Mink.

But he could never be thoroughly prepared; he’d come to realize this when he found himself standing in front of the Seragaki household. No matter how much time he was given, he would never be truly prepared.

Gulping down his throat, he shot a quick glance at Mink’s direction, just to see Mink staring at the house, his gaze unwavering. If Aoba’s hunch was right, he must be thinking about the same thing as him as well – what to say first, and how to face Tae.

He wasn’t alone, but he had Mink. They had each other.

“C’mon,” he nudged with a weak smile. Nothing would change if they kept standing around like this. They’d made it so far after all, it’s time for them to face this moment as they should.

“Granny,” Aoba knocked on the door, surprised when it slid open just from his first call. Standing right in front of him was Tae, the same as how Aoba had always seen her from their frequent video calls, wearing an expression that Aoba was already so very familiar with.

“You’re late,” Tae said with an angry huff. She frowned at Aoba, then looking to his side, meeting eyes with Mink.

“Nice to meet you again,” Mink said, having Aoba to gape at him when he bowed. “It’s been a long time.”

“Indeed,” Tae responded, her frown no longer visible, evidently taken aback. “Well, come on in.”

They moved into the house, the atmosphere of the space immediately wrapping Aoba in a sense of nostalgia. Nothing changed. _Nothing at all_. Every single item remained as where they were when Aoba left. It’s as if time had stopped at the precise moment when he made his departure, that he’d never left after all.

“Dinner will be ready soon,” Tae merely said. At that precise moment, Aoba noticed how they weren’t the only ones who were not prepared for the reason why they were here. Tae was too.

“Let me help you,” Aoba said in a rush, just to receive a glare from his grandmother.

“You’ve travelled far,” Tae snapped. “Just sit and wait.”

If his grandmother persisted, Aoba knew that there’s no way he could argue with her any further. With a bitter smile, he sat back, by Mink’s side, and watched as his grandmother made her way into the kitchen.

“Hah…” he sighed. His heart had been thumping furiously the entire time now. It’s weird. This was his home, he shouldn’t feel this way. But everything that had happened had been like a dream – him leaving home, to a place he had completely no idea of, and ended up settling down with a man he deemed to be his lifelong partner.

“I’ll do the talking later,” Mink said, the only sound besides his voice being the _tick, tock_ sound of the wall clock.

“I need to explain things too,” Aoba added. “But…” he looked around, feeling his nerves relaxed upon catching sight of the familiar sight of home. “…everything would be fine, right? It’s Granny, after all.”

Mink nodded in agreement. They’re thinking too much. Nothing was going to happen. They simply wanted to give Tae the explanation she well deserved.

Dinner was awkward, like how they’d expected. They seemed to be giving each other time to adjust into the situation, to make sense of everything that’s happening now and to recognize the fact that Mink was, in fact, Aoba’s partner at this very moment. And once they were done, with teas served on the coffee table in the living room, Aoba found his nerves jumping, the long overdue question of how to start the conversation returned to haunt him.

“So,” Tae started after a sip of her tear. “I believe you don’t return just to visit me?”

Tae knew. She always knew. Taking that as a sign, Mink started, while Aoba was still seeing a piece of white in his mind.

“We thought it’s time to talk to you about our relationship,” Mink said.

“Hm,” Tae hummed. She obviously expected the topic.

“But I’d like to start by apologizing,” Mink stood with a bow, a gesture Aoba hadn’t been expecting. “Sorry for everything I’ve caused to Aoba.”

Tae merely stared, wide-eyed.

“Why are you apologizing to me?” she asked instead.

Mink didn’t have the answer, but Aoba understood where he was coming from. Aoba was precious to Tae, and Tae was obviously the most important person in Aoba’s life. No one parent would want to see their child in distress, and that had been what Mink had caused Aoba before they put their conflicts into a full stop a year back.

“It’s fine,” Tae waved a hand. “As long as Aoba’s fine now.”

Aoba was the one who’d told her that he wanted to search for Mink, she was the one who told him to go ahead if he thought this was the right thing to do and Aoba knew she meant every word she said to him.

With his head held low, Aoba spoke too, realizing that it’s about time for him to spill his thoughts.

“I apologize too, for being reckless, and for causing so much troubles to you.”

Tae then released a loud ‘hmph!’ before she sipped on her tea again.

“To be honest, I’d never expect you to be so persistent over him. I don’t know what happened between the both of you in the tower, but I sure never expect you to change so… much.”

Changed, more like becoming who he once was again. But of course, it’s a topic that was too far of a league to explain to his grandmother so all Aoba could do was smile as he nodded.

“I’m fine, Granny,” he reassured. “I’m happy now.”

Tae fell silent before a smile lifted on her face.

“You don’t need to explain anything then,” she said. “Just go ahead with what you believe in.”

It’s the same words Tae had been telling him before he left, words that he held close to his heart, that’d saved him countless times when he was on the brink of giving up on his journey to search for Mink.

Then, she had her attention on Mink, who looked as if he was about to say something.

“I’ll take care of him,” he blurted out, eliciting an instant smile out of Tae.

“I don’t really want to know what happened to you in the past, but the past is the past,” she continued. “As long as everything’s fine now, then it’s fine.”

They shouldn’t be worrying in the first place after all. They’re speaking with Tae – and as Aoba expected, Tae had always been the one and only person who’d understand him after all, despite how he felt about the whole situation.

Even though they’d considered renting a place to stay in while they stayed in Midorijima, Tae’s consistent nagging had eventually made them stay in Aoba’s house. Aoba’s room wasn’t the biggest, definitely not enough to house two persons but Mink’s ‘it’s fine’ ultimately sweep his hesitance out of the window as he prepared the mattress and laid it on the floor.

It’s surreal – having Mink here in his room, a part of his house which he’d never shown to Mink. And above all, the very reality of them being in the Seragaki household, accepted wholly by Tae, a tardy weight lifted off their shoulders.

Never would he ever dream of spending time with Mink like this in his own house. Never would he ever dream of having such close interaction with Mink like it’s the most natural thing to do now. It’s amazing how one year could change a person, and how one year could come to change the positions they’re in. It’s as if they were living a completely different life, as if everything they’d encountered in their past – in Platinum Jail, in Oval Tower – being a huge illusion.

It was unbelievable.

As they slept under the same roof – with Mink insisted to sleep on the floor – Aoba turned, finding himself staring at Mink’s broad back. Would Mink disappear if he was to blink now? Would he wake up to find himself sleeping alone in his room; no Mink?

Is everything real? Is it supposed to be real?

He turned again, shaking his head, trying to brush his overloaded thoughts off.

Then, he heard movements, rustling sound of cloth and turning around again to see Mink looking at him.

“Ah, sorry, did I wake you up?” he apologized out of instinct.

“You didn’t,” Mink replied. He inched closer, where he could make out each other’s eyes perfectly. “Can’t sleep?”

“Yeah,” Aoba admitted. “I’m just… I just thought how crazy everything is now.”

“I understand.”

He’s not alone. Mink’s answer had confirmed so.

While he closed his eyes, trying to calm his thoughts down again, he felt a palm on his face, caressing it softly, gently.

“But it’s real.”

Of course. Every vow they had made with each other, the very promise they’d made on the cliff – all of these were real. They’d gone through a lot together, and even now when they were back in square one, nothing could erase the fact of how… involved they were with each other now.

If he ever had any doubts, Mink’s touch would always reaffirm him that everything was a reality he was living in this very moment. Perhaps that’s why Mink was touching him now. He loved his hand, the warmth of it vibrated silently across his skin, urging him to place his own hand on top of his, yearning to feel more of this very reality he was in.

He closed his eyes, simply feeling, and shivered a tad when a kiss was planted on his forehead.

Mink was _always_ like this. As if seeing through him, he could always tell when Aoba needed this assurance. And whenever he was to do this, Aoba could feel how hard he was trying to comfort him, despite his lack of words, despite the tiniest motion he was giving him. These sensations were everything Aoba yearned to feel from him. He wasn’t a man with words yet every word he was to say possess weight so ridiculously prominent that Aoba didn’t need any more assurance for him to know how much he meant to Mink.

It’s all thanks to that that he wanted to repay Mink for everything he’d done for him, telling and reminding him again and again that he’d never regretted choosing this path with him.

He wondered if Mink figured out that this was his real intention to why he wanted to come back? Not just to put things on the plate, as clear as day, but also to show Tae how very _happy_ he now was? He wondered if Mink felt a little less apprehensive now about how he’d come to end up with Aoba? He wondered if Tae’s approval of their relationship could serve as a lifelong assurance to their eternal vow?

He didn’t know how to put every ounce of emotions into words. He didn’t know if he should even tell Mink. All he could do was bury his face in Mink’s big, warm palm, taking in the pleasant scent of Mink’s odour, a part of Mink that was so vividly real he’d come to love.

“Mink…” he called out.

Mink’s face was vague in the dark; he could only make out the outline of it but he could tell how Mink was smiling at him. He stretched a hand, wanting to feel more, yearning to touch him, and Mink obeyed.

He _always_ obeyed.

Whatever Aoba asked of him, whatever Aoba yearned of him, he’d conform to them without a second thought. It was the loudest hint of submission that Aoba could ever get from him. He no longer needed to be afraid of him, because now, Aoba was the one standing on equal ground with him – he was the one who was holding his life source in his very hands, and he knew Mink held the same thing as well, both of their hands filled with the precious being of each other, irreplaceable and incomparable.

And there was nothing more comforting than being able to hold each other in their arms like this, hearing each other’s heartbeats, and telling each other just how real this very moment was, despite how unreal it seemed.

* * *

There was more than Tae that he needed to clear things out with. Midorijima was his home, and it was where Mink once spent his time too as well. So the next day, he found himself sitting in Black Needle, with a very disgruntled looking Koujaku and a bitter-smiling Mizuki.

“Was wondering when you’d finally break the truth to us,” Koujaku growled. It’d come as a huge shock for him when he realized what had happened between Aoba and Mink and it’d been a remorse for Aoba for unable to explain things to him.

“Ah… haha…” Aoba laughed awkwardly. He’d explained whatever he needed to; Koujaku’s disbelief was something he’d anticipated. He was expecting more reprimands but in the end, Koujaku let out a loud sigh, drowning his drink down his throat before he started on Aoba.

“Aoba, I thought we’re friends.”

“We are!” Aoba responded frantically. “That’s why I’m here, no? To explain… things…”

Even though he was one year too late.

“I trust you,” Koujaku said, leaning back against his chair. “But I don’t trust him.”

It was expected. Koujaku never had good impression towards Mink after all, it’s totally reasonable for him to be doubtful towards Mink.

Mink didn’t seem like he wanted to explain himself anyway. Simply sipping on his drink, he averted eye contact with Koujaku, until when Koujaku seemed like he was about to explode that he put his glass down, then coming face to face with him.

“I apologize if I happen to offend you,” he said, completely calm. “But I hope you could wish us luck.”

That certainly did the trick. The deep frown disappearing from Koujaku’s face, he stared, as if analyzing Mink from the inside out before he sighed again for the countless times that night.

“Like I said, I trust Aoba and that means I trust him to make the best decision for himself. If he wants to go with you, I could only wish him the best.” He drank again, finishing up his alcohol. “That said, it’s best if we could know each other better, don’t you think?”

Koujaku’s intention was so obvious Aoba can’t help but laugh, Mink’s small curves on the corners of his lips further causing Koujaku to frown at them.

“Why are you laughing?”

“Nothing,” Aoba said, trying very hard to contain his laughter. “Just wondering how you’d never changed after all this time.”

He knew Mink would agree with him, even when all he did was continue drinking without any verbal response.

“Whatever it is,” Koujaku slumped against his chair. “Just remember to take care of yourself.”

“I will. And Mink will look after me too.”

His final sentence was totally an intentional tease as he tried hard not to laugh too loud again when he saw Koujaku glaring at both of them.

* * *

Nothing had changed. Coming back to Midorijima was once a thought too far-fetched for them to consider. Midorijima was a place where everything started, and where everything ended. It was a place that was a complete different world from where their home was now. But at the same time, Midorijima was also a place that was connecting them with everything that they held close to their heart. It’s a place consisting of people who’d welcome them back with open arms when they needed it, it’s a place where everything that had happened were not mere coincidences but of necessity.

Midorijima was where everything happened, and was where their bond was made possible.

And with that, even if they were to return to where they lived now, they knew that nothing would ever replace how important Midorijima was for them – for what it meant to them, and for what the people they’d acquainted in the island meant to them.

It’s also their home after all – being a place of acceptance, and of everything that was what changed both of their life.


	105. One For One [Mink x Aoba]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Aoba’s first time spending winter with Mink but winter has never felt so warm in his entire life.

He wouldn’t call Midorijima a small town. It’s packed with different kinds of people, it rang with consistent hustles and bustles and it was a town where sleep was underappreciated. Neon lights shone in various corners, alleyways lined with good-for-nothings. It wasn’t the best town he’d choose to reside in but it was his home and he’d gotten used to it over time. Midorijima wasn’t luxurious, it didn’t have what everyone looked up to to be referred to as a platinum town. But Midorijima had enough, which was why Aoba was contented himself.

Now, however, as he settled down in the small town thousands of miles away from a place he called home, he found himself swarmed with a weird sense of nostalgia that had him taking time of his own to familiarize himself with the surroundings all over again. This place was a drastic difference from Midorijima. The town was much smaller, everyone knew everyone. It’s more casual, a maze of winding streets, of complicated past. Every building was different, borrowing this and that from various eras. It spelt of warmth and welcoming folks but it’s also submerged in faint mist of anguish and grief many of the residents attempted to get over with.

It was a town Aoba had come to love.

Frozen puddles cracked under his winter boots as he walked, along with Mink, towards the direction of the town. Mountains in a distance were pristine and white, every breath he released created visible puffs and drew icy air into his lungs. He yearned for warmth, but he craved more for the time spent with the man by his side, his mere existence the best comfort he could obtain.

“Cold?” Mink asked. As Aoba shook his head, he found an arm around his shoulder, warmth enfolding his body.

“You didn’t need to come,” Mink said, just to be responded by Aoba’s quick retort.

“But we’re buying things for winter. For our home.”

It’s the first winter he was to spend with Mink, in this very hometown of his. He wanted to experience everything – from the freezing chill in the air to the hearty food they made for each other, warming them to their toes – and to go through everything until they greeted the first green of spring again. He missed the warmth of Midorijima, the warmth his family and friends showered him in.

But it’s not something he could help.

Maybe.

The town looked like a postcard in winter, blanketed in white, everything still and cold. It’s Aoba’s first time having to experience this extent of cold ever since he came to live here and it’d taken him one whole week to finally get used to it, even though it’s practically impossible to pull himself off the layers of thick clothing draped all over him. The villagers were as welcoming as usual when he stepped into the marketplace with Mink. Despite the little responses on Mink’s face, they talked to him, recommending whatever he was asking for when he asked. Aoba found himself ogling at almost every decoration he could set his eyes on – most of the ornaments were hand-made, fascinating him. He didn’t have a lot of chance to see this kind of elusive handmade items when he was in Midorijima himself, and it startled him on how local people could make the best out of everything despite using the easiest items they could find.

“Ah,” he released a small sound upon catching sight of a row of dreamcatchers lining along the street, a gorgeous sight that was even magical.

“It’s beautiful,” he breathed. Mink followed his gaze, a small smile curved on the corners of his lips.

He’d never seen such a sight in Midorijima before, and it was when he came to stay with Mink that he realized how much more of this world that he’d never come to know.

But—

“Mink,” he called out as they’re on the way home.

It’s been a while since he returned home, [the last time being spring](http://shinocchidesu.net/post/154936843979/changed-unchangeddmmd-fanfic), when they returned to finally shed light on things with Tae and his friends. Midorijima wouldn’t be as cold at this point of the year, but that wasn’t why Aoba wanted to return.

“I’m thinking of going back to Midorijima in a few days,” he said, the few words seemed to be taking away most of his willpower.

“Why?” Mink asked. He wasn’t questioning him, nor was he about to stop him; it was mere genuine concern that Aoba had come to understand very well.

“Granny doesn’t seem like she’s in the best state,” Aoba said slowly. “Besides, it’s been a while since I returned.”

Mink fell silent for a few moments, their silence interrupted by the sound of their dawdling footsteps.

“I might not be able to join this time,” he said at long last, when they could finally see the outline of their house in a distance.

“Work?” Aoba speculated.

“Yeah.”

It’d be a lie if he was to say that he didn’t feel the slightest drop of heart but he swallowed the emotion down, focusing on whatever he’d planned in his head before he started again.

“It’s fine, I understand. It’s not going to be a long trip anyway.”

This might be the first time he was to be separated with Mink.

* * *

Mink helped him with his packing up. He didn’t have much to bring with him anyway; it’s only going to be a mere two days of stay. While he was sure that he’d brought along one set of winter coat just in case, he soon found a second set in his luggage, tittering at the thought of an overly concerned Mink. Even when they were on their way to the airport, they exchanged trifling words – Mink having his attention on the street at all times, while Aoba stuttered, wondering if he should say anything at all.

It’s when they were finally at the airport that Aoba set his luggage aside, then giving Mink a firm embrace, words that he’d wanted to say since the entire journey rolling out of his tongue at the final moment.

“I promise I’ll come back soon,” he said, his heart clenched upon feeling Mink’s soft touches on the back of his head.

“Don’t worry about it,” Mink said. “Make sure to have fun when you’re there.”

Mink was definitely not making it easier for him to say his goodbye. Quaffing down his tears, he waved a final farewell to Mink and stepped into the departure hall, all the while wondering if this was a right decision after all.

The air in Midorijima smelled different from where he was used to. It’s nostalgic, yet foreign at the same time. Listening to Tae’s usual nagging, he smiled bitterly, feeling a lot better since he parted ways with Mink. He’d contacted Mink just to inform that he’d arrived safely, but he’d wanted to hear his voice again the moment he ended the call. Even when he was hanging out with Koujaku and Mizuki in Black Needle, he was constantly distracted, only coming back to himself when Koujaku patted him crudely on the shoulder.

“How should I communicate with a man whose heart is not even here, I wonder?” he joked.

He remembered the time when he’d brought Mink back to meet them again – to reintroduce him to his family and friends – Koujaku had portrayed a sort of sundry emotions on his face that he wasn’t able to forget until now. He was obviously conflicted – since he never had good impressions towards Mink – but at the same time, Aoba knew that he held profound trust towards him, including the decision he was to make. He shook his head. Now that he’s here, back in his hometown with his buddies, he shouldn’t let anything else bother the very limited interactions they had ever since he moved away.

But no matter how hard he tried, there’s no way he could brush Mink off his mind. Mink had always been with him, and he no longer felt like himself now that he’s not.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he spoke to the screen. It was early morning where Mink lived, the few dishes of freshly served breakfast visible from the range of where his Coil screen could capture. “Granny is fine too, she asked you to make sure not to catch a cold.”

He chuckled at the end of his words, noticing that Mink did a small laugh himself as well. Judging from the layers of clothing Mink was swathed in, he’s sure that the weather there hadn’t been kind to him either.

“No, but really,” he quickly added. “Please take care of yourself, Mink.”

“I will.”

He leaned his head closer towards the screen, dreading for any sort of warmth from Mink, yearning to feel the hint of reassurance telling him that Mink was still by his side, despite them being separated thousands of miles apart.

“Remember to eat,” Mink said, munching on his bread with Ruracane landing on his shoulder after.

“I will,” he repeated Mink’s words. “I’ll try to be back by Christmas!”

If nothing came up, he should be able to return before Christmas. He needed to. This was the first year he was to spend Christmas with Mink, he needed to make sure that he went home on time.

“No need to rush,” Mink said instead.

Don’t Mink want to spend Christmas with him? Brushing the thought off his head, he continued,

“I’ll try.”

It felt harder to bid farewell than when they were in the airport. Even after he did, his heart felt hefty, as if he’d left his conscious state where Mink was.

“Aoba.”

Tae’s voice pulled him back from the realm of his own thoughts. As he looked around, he found his grandmother sitting on the chair, wools and knitting materials scattered the table.

“Didn’t you want to make this?” she asked.

“Oh, yeah, right.”

This wasn’t the time to feel down yet, he told himself. He had more important things to focus on – and he needed to make it work.

* * *

It was the slowest two days he’d ever gone through. He sighed as he looked over his shoulder, to Tae and Koujaku who’d come to send him off. Moments like this was always the hardest to endure. He’d get so conflicted over staying and leaving yet both of where he’s living and leaving were his homes and he could only convince himself that he’d be back soon to make himself feel better. Sitting in the plane gave him a sudden sense of relief that he didn’t know he needed.

He’s finally going home. To where Mink was.

It’s not hard to find Mink the moment he stepped out of the airport. He stood as close as he could by the door, waving the moment Aoba made his way out to the smell of white and cold.

“Mink!” he called out, rustling his way towards him, almost slipped before Mink rushed over to support him.

“Don’t run,” Mink reprimanded.

“Did you have a good trip home, Aoba?” Ruracane flew to sit on his shoulder, equally eager as Mink to have seen Aoba again.

“It’s okay,” Aoba grinned. “Ah, right.”

He brought Ren out of his bag, activated him and immediately hearing the familiar tone of voice.

“Aoba.”

“Hey, Ren.”

“Did you have a good flight?”

“Ah… haha, I guess it’s better than the previous ones I’ve taken,” Aoba snickered inordinately.

“Let’s go home.”

If Mink hadn’t been interfering with their quick reunion, he wouldn’t even notice how cold it’d become – perhaps even colder than when he left.

“Granny’s fine,” he said as they made their way home. “Just the usual strains.”

“You told me about it,” Mink said.

“Did I?” Aoba smiled blithely. He wanted to tell Mink about everything and anything but it was so cold his mind was wiped blank. “Everything’s fine back home.”

Mink smiled. Then, he was enveloped into a one-arm hug, warmth swarmed him from the inside out the moment Mink did that.

“I’m glad to be home.”

“Welcome home.”

He missed home – the smell of fragrance stemmed from the oven the moment he stepped into it, and the extra ornaments that weren’t there when he left were everything he missed. As soon as he put his bag down, he rushed to stare at the colourful ornaments, bright grin gracing his features at all times as he visualized how Mink had put up everything all by himself. He caught some delicately hand-made items dangling from the shelf, knowing that all of them were made by Mink, and giggled when he found new bottles of what looked like sweet candies on the shelves. How much did Mink do when he was away? It seemed like a lot of effort was needed to prepare all these ornaments and candies, especially when Mink was usually vigilant with everything he did.

“Dinner’s ready.”

He hopped his way into the kitchen, his mood extremely good, his tummy growled in intense hunger.          

“Wow.”

The table was lined up with various kinds of food that he’d never seen before: roasted beef, sweet potatoes, bread pudding and an apple crumb pie. Everything held portions he knew would give him a bloated stomach at the end of the day. But he took everything in regardless, eating them to the final piece, drinking the warm cider apple to the last drop. And it didn’t come as a surprise when they found themselves cuddling under the sheets, the warmth he was engulfed in a sweet comfort protecting him from the cold weather.

“Merry Christmas,” he muttered under his breath.

Mink’s palm on his naked torso was warm; he felt as if he was feeling his heartbeats, every inch of skin where Mink touched sweltered under intense pleasure. He loved Mink’s hands – he always loved them. They’re huge, enough to keep him safe, and when they made their way to his skin he felt all his self-control crumble into dust, his body and his soul attracted to Mink like the most natural thing. He loved Mink’s scent, it’s as if it’s a barrier that kept him warm, a sort of comfort that was so heartening he found no need to hesitate. It’s only Mink who could make him feel this way; regardless of how gentle or how desperate Mink was to be with him, he’d give him what he wanted, for he had given him what _he_ wanted.

Their afterglow was always one of quiet and peace. They simply lied in the bed, taking in the pleasant air that was the scent of sex and simply indulging in each other’s presence. They didn’t really need words, their hearts seemed to have connected.

As winter breeze blew steadily into the room, he shivered a tad, sitting up with a start upon being reminded of something.

“Oh yeah.”

And before Mink could say anything, he strode out of the room, with the blanket wrapped around him and coming back with a packet in his hands.

“I almost forgot!” Aoba exclaimed as he rushed towards Mink, who was perking a curious eyebrow at him.

“Merry Christmas!” he said, pushing the packet into Mink’s arms.

With unhurried motions, Mink started unpacking the parcel, eyes brightening when a red-coloured knitted scarf was pulled out of the parcel.

“I-it’s nothing much,” Aoba immediately said. ‘I asked Granny for some help and—Mink?”

Mink’s response was minimal, all he did was staring at the scarf in his hand, thumbs stroking the coarse material of wool before he seized Aoba over, hugging him in his arms.

“Thank you.”

“I-it’s really nothing much…” Aoba repeated, heat rose to the tips of his ears. “I hope you like it.”

Mink’s answer came in the form of a tighter hug it’s almost suffocating Aoba. By the time he released Aoba, a warm smile was gracing his features, an expression he hadn’t expected. But Mink seemed happy about it, and that’s really the only thing he’d hoped to receive from him.

“I made you something too.”

With dumbfounded eyes, he watched as Mink reached out to the drawer on his bedside table, taking out a blue gradient dreamcatcher. Aoba could only stare as he lifted Aoba’s hands and put the dreamcatcher on it, the light sensation of feather tickling Aoba’s skin.

“Merry Christmas.”

Did Mink make this for him when he’s away? Without his knowledge? Did they make each other gifts without telling each other – to surprise each other? He didn’t know how to respond. He’s too overwhelmed with emotions to organize his thoughts in place. The dreamcatcher looked so adroitly made, every detail Mink embedded on it had Aoba staring in awe. He felt a hand twirling with his hair, playing with the ornaments Mink had made for him. He remembered where he saw a dreamcatcher like this before – it was in the town when they first did their winter shopping, when Aoba stopped to stare simply because he thought the line-up of the dreamcatchers being a magnificent sight.

Had Mink been observing him all this while? Did Mink think that he was fond towards them, that’s why he decided to make one for him himself?

He felt sob at the back on his throat, trying hard not to have his emotions fall as he smiled, as bright as he could, at Mink.

“Thank you. I love it.”

“Hope this helps getting rid of your nightmares as well,” Mink said with a kiss on his forehead.

Was this the purpose of the dreamcatcher, Aoba wondered. And how did Mink know that he’d been having nightmares once a while? He’d never told Mink so that he wouldn’t worry him.

But Mink was obviously way too observant than he thought he would. And despite how much he wanted to tell Mink that having him by his side would get rid of whatever nightmares he was to get, he could only let himself be embraced by Mink, let himself be engulfed in Mink’s benign warmth, and promising himself that he’d spend Christmas every year with Mink, regardless of what was to happen.


	106. Moving On; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s only one way to deal with death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains character death.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Aoba?”

Pulling voice out of his throat was a task too challenging for him. He was no way okay, but he needed to start somewhere to be able to move on; even if it meant having to give himself an illusion of himself being fine, then so be it.

“I’ll be fine, Koujaku,” he finally managed to force words out of his mouth, albeit sounding like nothing he’d told Koujaku. His voice was hoarse, as if he hadn’t been speaking for days, and there were still sounds of sniffing that he was certain that Koujaku could very well hear from the other side of the phone.

A brief moment of silence spread in between them before he heard Koujaku sighing from the other side before he spoke.

“Whatever it is, take care of yourself. I’ll be around too if you need anything at all.”

“Don’t worry, Koujaku,” Aoba attempted a forced chuckle. “Noiz is with me, remember?”

Another pause. Then.

“Is he fine too?”

“Huh? Noiz?”

“…yeah.”

“Worrying about him? That’s rare of you,” Aoba chortled, this time, a natural one.

“Not worrying about him, I’m more worried about you. I don’t know him well enough to know how he’d react in a situation like this but definitely do not wish for him to be in a condition that’s less than capable to take care of you.”

“Well… if anything is to happen to him, I can take care of him too, you know?”

“It’s not that I’m underestimating you, Aoba,” Koujaku hastily said. “I’m just–”

“–worried. I know, Koujaku. And I’m sure Noiz knows too. We won’t tell you not to, it’s just natural but, you know, maybe you can trust us enough to let you know if we really need any sort of help.”

He could almost hear Koujaku’s relieved smile from the vague breath he could hear in his ear.

“Sure,” Koujaku said at long last. “I’ll come over tomorrow to help out with the rest of the stuff. You must be tired today, take some rest.”

“I will. You too, Koujaku.”

When he hung up the call, Aoba released a profound sigh as he leaned against the wall with closed eyes. A lot had been happening indeed. It wasn’t like he hadn’t had any mental preparation beforehand. He’d know about Tae’s situation since a year back, and ever since, he’d increased his frequency of coming back to Midorijima, even staying for weeks before going back to Germany. At one point, he’d felt extremely bad for having to leave Noiz for a long period of time (despite some times Noiz was able to find time off his workload and accompany Aoba back) but all Noiz had told him was to focus his attention on Tae instead of on him. He couldn’t quite do exactly like what Noiz told him to; he still worried, but when Tae’s situation became worse over the weeks, he eventually found himself being unable to tear his mind off his grandmother. Eventually, he decided to move back to Midorijima for a longer stay, knowing that if he didn’t, he’d probably regret for the rest of his life.

It was two months without Noiz before Aoba found Noiz knocking on his door in the middle of September, showing up with few luggage and a notice telling him that he’d be staying over with Aoba for as long as Aoba needed him to. Perhaps the exasperation on his face had given him away, or perhaps it was his lack of response, but Noiz wasn’t waiting for Aoba’s approval before he held him in his arms, allowing Aoba to sob quietly into his shoulders on the night he’d found himself in front of the Seragaki household.

Despite so, it wasn’t hard for Aoba to grasp the hint of why Noiz deemed it an urgency to move back to Midorijima at a time like this. The reality that he never wanted to face was closer than before. Time wasn’t giving him any chance, nor did it intend to let him take his own sweet time with trying to to adapt to the truth.

And finally, it was one rainy day that Aoba found himself sitting by Tae’s bed in the hospital, with Noiz by his side, and Koujaku, Mizuki, along with the rest of the neighbourhood waiting outside the door.

“Aoba…” Tae grasped onto Aoba’s hand, fighting to breath every word that she could contain. Aoba had completely lost his words at this point. Merely able to sob into Tae’s hand, he strained his ears, taking in every word Tae wanted to say to him.

“I’m here, Granny…” he muttered.

“Remember…” Tae’s words were small and few, but still strong all at the same time. “Always… choose… the… path that you… believe in… no matter… what it is…”

Aoba nodded vigorously, tears streaming more and more down his cheeks, damping the whole of Tae’s palm.

“I will, Granny. I’ll remember everything you told me.”

When he looked up, Tae was smiling weakly at her. She lifted a hand, having Aoba to immediately sprung towards her, so that she could caress him on the head.

“Please… “ Her gaze moved towards Noiz instead, who was standing by Aoba’s side, looking deadpan and emotionless. “Take care… of him…”

With those words, Noiz strode towards her, crouched, and took her free hand into his own.

“I will. Please don’t worry.”

Tae lifted a contented smile, before she closed her eyes.

Aoba had never wanted this day to come. Deep in his heart, he knew that it was something unavoidable and all that he could do for his grandmother was to make sure that he’s in a condition happy and healthy enough so that Tae wouldn’t need to worry about anything when the time came for her. He should be relieved, seeing how contented Tae was. But there’s nothing he could help when the hard fact of losing his only family member happened right before his very eyes.

He would never be ready to take the truth.

Opening his eyes, he stared blankly at the ceiling, eyes still sore from too much crying, throat still painful from too much shouting. He’d been dehydrated for days but yet, ironically, today, on the day of Tae’s funeral, he bear no tears, he was no longer sobbing, and he was no longer yelling. Instead, he appeared calm throughout the whole preparation, then the whole function, and lastly, when he was left behind with no one else but Noiz by his side after the funeral, all that he did was tracing light touches on Tae’s name on her graveyard, still unable to respond to anything at all.

The pain in his chest was excruciating; it was as if something was tearing him apart from the inside, sucking all the remaining life force out of him, and attempting to crush his sanity into dust. His emotions were numb; he could no longer tell what he should do with his life anymore.

All he did was sitting in front of the grave for hours, doing nothing but staring, all the while with Noiz by his side. He didn’t even notice when he fell asleep; he must have passed out all by himself, his body finally hit its limit, and the next thing he knew was himself waking up in his own bed in his own house, darkness clouding his vision with weak rays of light from the outside street lamps invading his room through the gaps of his curtain. Sitting up, his conscious wavered a tad before he swallowed down his throat, only then realizing how dry it was.

His steps were heavy when he left his room, but there were lights around the house and he could hear sounds from the kitchen so he followed the trace, smelling pleasant scent of food and drawing grumbling sounds out of his stomach out of instinct.

“Noiz…”

Noiz was busying himself at the counter, cooking, when Aoba approached him. Hearing Aoba’s voice, he turned around, eyes widening, before he put down whatever utensils he was holding in his hands and hurried towards Aoba.

“What’s– hng?!”

Noiz had pulled him into an embrace, thrusting air out of his lungs, before he returned Noiz’s hug.

“What’s the matter?” he asked through hoarse voice. Now that he thought about it, he had been so occupied with himself and Tae that he hadn’t been thinking much about Noiz. He raised a hand, wanting to pat Noiz on the head, just to find Noiz embracing him tighter in response.

“You look horrible,” was all Noiz said before he buried his head into Aoba’s shoulder.

“Huh? …Oh, ah… Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine soon.”

“Is that so?” Noiz mumbled into Aoba’s shoulder. “Don’t push yourself too hard. If you need to talk, I’ll be here. If you need to cry, I’ll be here too.”

How can Noiz ever pick him into his flow in such a casual manner, as if it’s the most natural thing ever? How was it even possible for Noiz to know all his weak spots and to confront them in such an effective way all the time? Pressing his face against Noiz’s shoulder, his heart felt a painful clench, and before he knew it, he was crying into Noiz’s shoulder, all the anguish and tears and pain that he’d been sustaining and clogged up within him set free. He cried all he wanted, screamed all he wanted. His fingers clenched hard on Noiz’s shirt, he could feel his nails digging into his own skin, but he wasn’t going to stop.

He let his emotions run amok for a long time and before he knew it, it’d been two hours since he broke down.

Across the years he’d been staying with Noiz he’d come to know that Noiz’s proficiency in picking up new skills was on a level that’s almost humanly impossible. Despite his disordered emotions, he could still taste flavours on the meal Noiz had prepared for him. And after spending almost an hour in the shower, he came out to his room, just to see Noiz sitting on his bed, looking at what seemed to be a few screens of statistics on his hologram screens.

Oh, it must’ve affected Noiz’s work now that he’d spent so many months out of the country. He felt kind of bad.

“Hey, Noiz,” he called out, taking small steps to join Noiz on the bed.

“Hey,” Noiz responded with a smile. He kept all his screens away, put his AllMate aside, and spread his arms open, just to have Aoba falling into his embrace.

“You know… you can go back first if you want,” Aoba said frankly. “I think things are pretty much done here. All that I need to do now is to pack up the things and… see how to relocate them.”

“I’m not going back,” Noiz said, firmed. “I’ll be with you until the end.”

Aoba chuckled bitterly.

“What do you plan to do with this place, anyway?” Noiz asked, an attempt to distract Aoba’s thoughts.

“I don’t know…” Aoba trailed off. “I don’t feel like letting this place go. It has too many memories, every corner, every item, just… I…”

“Then don’t let go,” Noiz interrupted. He wrapped his hands around Aoba’s waist, pulling him over so that Aoba’s back was pressed against his chest. “Leave them as they are. You can still come back anytime you want. You still have your friends here, you have yet to lose everything.”

Aoba closed his eyes then, lying his head back and leaning it against Noiz’s shoulder.

“If you want, we can move back too. And we can stay here, keep this place occupied. It would be easier for you too, since this is where–”

“Noiz.”

Aoba’s word halted Noiz’s speech. Allowing a few moments of silence between them, he continued,

“I’m moving on. I need to. I understand what you’re trying to do and I appreciate it, but… I need to move on. Granny doesn’t wish for me to continue sulking. I can imagine her shouting at me if she sees me like this,” he ended with a scattered chuckle.

“If you’re sure,” Noiz said in a low tone. Turning Aoba’s face a tad to the side, he kissed lightly on Aoba’s cheek, then pecked him softly on the lips. “But I’m sure you’ll overcome this. You’ve been that kind of man, after all.”

“How about you?” Aoba turned around, looking Noiz in the eyes. The lights were off in the room, and with the dim moonlight spraying into the space, Noiz’s lime-green orbs appeared all the more vibrant in the midst of darkness.

“What about me?”

“Don’t you… feel anything at all?”

Noiz looked away, gaze shifting from the blank wall space in a distance to looking out of the window, at the sky.

“I do but it’s, how to put this…” He paused for a few moments, finding his words, then started again. “It’s hard to express. It’s like a barrier, stopping me to.”

“Like how it was when you couldn’t feel pain?” Aoba helped.

“Something like that.”

“Hmmm,” Aoba considered. “Maybe because you’re so used to it that it becomes a habit, or some sort of defense mechanism. You feel things, but you can’t express as openly as you like. Maybe…”

“Yeah, that could be it. I hope you don’t misunderstand me as not feeling anything from everything that’s happening. Death is… nothing pleasant, after all.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Aoba waved his hand with a grin. “How long do you think we have been together, huh?”

Noiz responded with a small smirk. Hugging Aoba closer, he placed his chin on Aoba’s shoulder, then leaned his head against Aoba’s neck.

“Sooner or later, we’d have to face this ourselves too.”

The air in the room became visibly heavier with the shift of topic. With a light sigh, Aoba broke the silence.

“I wonder who will go first? You or me?”

“Who do you prefer?”

“Who knows…” Aoba said slowly. “I’m older than you, though. Maybe I’ll go first.”

“It’s only a four years difference,” Noiz retorted.

“You’re right, haha!” Aoba laughed.

“But regardless of who would be first, we will see each other till the end, right?” Noiz asked, tone light, mood light.

“Of course,” Aoba said. “We’ll make sure that will happen.”

Then, if that’s the case, nothing else mattered anymore. Death was but another new journey, a new beginning that opens up to possibilities that no one could ever anticipate. But death was, as well, a part of life. No one could escape death, but the end of the journey shouldn’t be what a person should aim for in their life. It’s the process of it that should matter above everything else.

Tae had said that Aoba was the biggest miracle in her life, and Aoba had been nothing but grateful for being granted this life, despite unnatural.

Their road is still far, it’s not the end for them yet. And even if it’s soon going to be, they’ll make sure that no regrets are left behind before time separates them from each other.


	107. Delicacy; Mink/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s only one kind of treasure Mink needs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was sick for a few days and couldn’t do too much so I ended up listening to Mink and Ren’s drama CDs and this was the outcome of a bedridden period. Very simple idea, I only wanted Mink to decorate Aoba with his elegant ornaments u/////u

The trees stood mute in the summer breeze. The heat so devastating he thought he was going to shrivel in the spot, wrecked. Every step felt heavy, every pace had sweat rolling along his cheek as he raised a hand, wiping droplets off his forehead.

“Aoba, are you okay?”

“F-fine,” Aoba muttered, albeit with distinct endeavor.

It’s only a few more tracks to home. Then, he’d slump onto the chair, take a breath, before he prepare for dinner.

He honestly didn’t expect summer to arrive in such an brusque way; not in a way where heat was suddenly engulfing him from the inside out, not in a way when warmth was giving him an illusionary claustrophobic, having him to drag his feet as he fought his way home.

Midorijima had its summer moments too, but not in this way. It’s pure luck for him to land himself in this very season just two months into moving over.

When he finally reached home, he hauled a profound sigh, collapsing face-down onto the couch and refusing to move an inch.

He seriously thought he’d die out there.

“Aoba, you should drink some water,” Ren urged, placing his paw gently against Aoba’s outstretch arms.

“Hm? Oh, yeah. I should,” Aoba responded absentmindedly.

Perhaps a shower too. Dragging himself unwillingly off the couch, he lugged heavy legs into the kitchen, drowned five full glasses of water down his throat, then threw himself towards the door leading to the shower.

He came out soon with his hair up in a high ponytail, with nothing but a towel around his waist as he made his way back to his room. He felt much better after the shower, but sweat soon formed on his skin when he did as much as putting clothes on himself, his hand movements stopped when he was about to pull the band off his hair. It’s only 15:00 now; it’s going to be hot for a long time more. If he was going to busy himself in the kitchen, that’d mean more work and that’d also mean more sweat.

He decided to leave his ponytail as it was.

The air was no less sultry than when before he went into the shower. He’d discarded his jacket and was now wearing just a simple shirt with shorts that he’d definitely not wear when he was to step out of the house but yet, sweat dripped along his cheek when all he did was walking from his room to the kitchen, his back already slicked, the thin material of his clothes stuck against his back.

Dousing another glass of water down his throat, he took the ingredients out, laying them along the counter. Today’s meal was uncomplicated, just catfish with dried nuts, pumpkin soup, coupled with biscuit bread. It’s all recipes he’d picked up from Mink, whom he’d learned to have appetite a contrast with his built. It shouldn’t take too long if he could remember them well. A good three hours or less, maybe…?

“Ren, could you pull up the recipes for the soup?” Aoba asked, staring blankly at the pumpkin he’d just laid on the counter, suddenly at a loss of what he should do first.

“Understood.” With that said, Ren conjured a hologram screen and pulled it up to paste on the same eye level as Aoba.

“Hmmm… so I’d need to heat the oil first…”

That’d mean more warmth; his body did a frivolous quiver at the thought.

With a sigh, he said, “Guess I need to get used to this too.”

A few hours might feel like a few days.

He was so engrossed with the humidity of the air that he didn’t hear when Mink walked through the door, standing at the doorway, watching as he worked. He wore a frown in between his eyebrows, slicing bread into equal pieces and jumped when he felt fingers on the tip of his hair, twirling and pulling.

“Ah, Mink, welcome home. Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

“It’s fine,” Mink said briefly, fingers still on Aoba’s hair, before he drifted his gaze to look at the counter. “Do you need help?”

“Hm? It’s fine, I’m almost done. Please take a rest first.”

Mink stood without saying a word, eyes still meandering around the space, alternating between the counter and Aoba’s hair, while Aoba returned to his bread, concentration so acute that he didn’t notice that Mink was twirling on more strands of his hair.

It’s a few moments later when Mink finally decided to leave him alone, bringing with him a set of new deliberations that wouldn’t have ever crossed Aoba’s mind.

He wasn’t sure if it was even possible to sleep in this heat. But he’d never know if he never tried. After taking yet another shower, he paced towards Mink’s room with a towel still dangling around his neck, about to bid him goodnight.

With a calm “come in”, Aoba walked into the room, brushing his hair as he did, and eyes brightening when he saw that Mink wasn’t doing his usual reading – instead, he was tinkering with tiny items under the weak lighting of his beside table, his glasses on, and he didn’t even look up when Aoba approached him.

“That's…?”

“Do you like it?”

Aoba didn’t know what they were but they looked exquisite and pretty – small beads of various colours scattering around the surface, alongside feathers tied loosely against the edge of the table. He’d never seen Mink doing something like this before, was it a hobby of Mink’s that he’d never come to know? Like how he’d come to find out about Mink’s reading habits?

Mink had looked up at him when his response delayed. Shaking his head slightly, he said,

“Yeah, they're… beautiful.”

Mink lifted a small smile. Then, while Aoba was still trying to figure out what he was doing, Mink had grasped him sparsely on his wrist, urging him closer.

He followed Mink’s motion, sitting on the bed, heart beating loudly in his ears, unsure of what Mink was about to do.

But Mink said nothing. Letting him go, he continued with whatever he was doing before Aoba interrupted him, leaving Aoba to stare at his movements.

After a short moment, Mink straightened his back, taking up one of the ornaments that looked the most completed, then bringing it close to Aoba’s face.

“They shouldn’t be too heavy,” Mink mumbled, as if speaking to himself.

“What is this, Mink?” Aoba finally brought himself to ask him.

“For your hair,” Mink responded briefly.

Huh?

Huh?!

“It’s hot, isn’t it?” Mink asked, finishing up the remaining of the few other similar-looking ornaments. “These could help you tie a few strands of your hair. Of course, if you prefer, you can cut it off too.”

It took a long while for Aoba to finally what Mink was implying, all the while gaping at Mink, being completely bewildered.

“Do you want to cut it off?” Mink asked again, noticing the long pause.

“H-huh? No. No, no, no! I’ve never thought of cutting it off,” Aoba answered frantically. The sensations in his hair were gone but he’d never once considered cutting it off, despite how hot it’d be. He couldn’t imagine himself cutting it off either. He’d been a long-hair since as long as he could remember, after all.

“Hope these help, then,” Mink said, a shadow of what looked strangely like a curve of smile formed on Mink’s face.

“They definitely will!” Aoba affirmed with a wide grin.

He sat still when Mink brought the ornaments to his hair, attaching them attentively, one by one, and spread them around the circumference of his head. He could feel a meager pull every once a while, and as time passed, he closed his eyes, thoroughly enjoying the harmonious air between them, all the while trying hard not to bring his grin to be too obvious.

“It’s done,” Mink said at long last. When Aoba opened his eyes, Mink had brought a mirror to his face, gesturing for Aoba to check out his new look for himself.

The hair ornaments dangled lightly along his hair. When he crooked his head, he saw that Mink had braided a few parts of his hair as well. For some odd reason, his head really felt lighter, parts where his skin were exposed thanks to the firming up of his hair strands had light breeze brushing across them, giving him a sort of comforting sensation. He couldn’t help but smile.

“I like them,” he said, directing the beam at Mink.

Mink mirrored his smile.

And at that precise moment, he hoped that that smile he’d seen on Mink was more than just an indication of relief, but was also one of gratification as well.

He found out new things about Mink the longer he stayed with him. And today, he found out about Mink’s elegant skill, also one that he’d reflected on Aoba, his most delicate treasure ever.


	108. Dominance; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He needs to keep the brat’s mouth shut. At least for once.

Aoba had no ways to describe himself. Others may do a better job than him; they could probably see things in him that he could never see in himself. Different people had come to describe him differently and he couldn’t tell if they were accurate representations of him or they were simply deciphering him from the outer shell that was what he presented. But. Despite how others would come to describe him, he knew that there was one absolute trait of his that would never go wrong.

His ego.

He wasn’t sure if it was a universal man thing but when it came to his pride, there’s no way that he could ever give way – not to anyone, and definitely not to Noiz. That’s perhaps why he’d felt many distinctions of frustration when it came to Noiz; the fact that Noiz had always managed to pull him into his pace, alongside the fact that he was always willingly falling into his flow was something he could never understand of himself. What exactly did Noiz possess – what power did he have – to make Aoba conform just like that? Many times, he’d find himself lifting his restraint higher, reminding himself over and over again to not let his emotions get to his brain as he scrutinized every one of Noiz’s action, putting himself in absolute control. Yet, he fell into his trap, again and again, and before he knew it, he’d always find himself utterly overwhelmed by his subconscious, waking up next to Noiz with agony swarming him from the inside, and the moment Noiz lifted his victorious smirk at him when Aoba threw his pillow at his face, he knew that Noiz did everything on purpose after all.

It was truthfully frustrating. It can’t continue. He wanted to be in control too.  
And he would, tonight – he would make sure that he’d take over the anchor to this dominance ship they were both sailing on.

First, he caught Noiz off guard with an intense kiss, a surprise attack he’d launched on Noiz the moment Noiz stepped out of the bathroom, body still slicked with droplets of water with his hair still in the midst of drying up. Noiz was clearly taken aback, Aoba could see it in his eyes, a small blossoming of triumph budded in his chest the moment he did. There were tongues, lips pressing hard against lips, hands all over each other’s bodies. They were more than familiar with each other’s bodies; Aoba had come to know the part in Noiz’s skin that could draw the best reaction out of him. And Noiz, of course, wouldn’t miss the chance to slip his hand down to where Aoba’s ribs were, just to have Aoba catching him on the wrist before he was even close to touching them.

“Ah-ah,” Aoba shook his head with a naughty smirk. “No touching until I say so.”

“Heh,” Noiz mirrored his grin. “So someone is finally out to get me, I see.”

“You’ve had your moments,” Aoba snapped. “Time to let you know how fearful I could be.”

Noiz’s smirk only lifted higher.

“I look forward to that, Big Brother.”

Aoba knew that he was provoking him on purpose. With a frown, he lurched towards Noiz and bit him hard on his lower lip, drawing blood. He licked frivolously on the trace of red, then bringing the tip of his tongue to lick on his own upper lip instead, smearing red across his own lip.

His heart did a funny leap when he saw Noiz swallowing down his throat at his mere action and, without giving Noiz a moment to rest, he kissed him again, hard and passionate, with a solid intention to suck the air out of him. He grasped onto both of Noiz’s wrists, locking them in place and gestured them towards the bed, where he gave Noiz a rough push, then towering over him, starting to take his shirt and pants off at the same time.

Noiz did nothing but stare throughout the entire time. He flashed his gaze, starting from locking eyes with Aoba then trailing a searing route down his torso, ultimately resting his eyes on his crotch.

“Do you need help with that?” he pointed his chin at Aoba’s half-hard dick, his voice hoarse. But all Aoba did was pressing a finger against his lips, leaning close enough to feel Noiz’s hot breath against his face before he said,

“You be a good boy tonight and keep quiet.”

Noiz did as he was told. Being completely quiet, all he did was giving Aoba his penetrating stare, as if memorizing every one of Aoba’s actions and having Aoba to brush his self-conscious out of the way before he reached a hand down to hold onto his own erection.

He rubbed, biting on his lower lip to refrain his voice, his chest rising up and down from the heightening intensity. He could clearly feel heat overwhelming him from the inside; he was clearly turned on, especially when Noiz was literally staring at him as he pumped on his own dick. And, not long after, his dick was rock-hard, clear liquid leaked from the tip, dripping onto the mattress before he closed his eyes to take a deep breath, trying to contain himself. 

He needed to stay composed. He needed to make Noiz come first tonight. It’s not even a matter of endurance anymore; it’s a matter of his pride and he took it very, very seriously. More than anything else.

He leaned forward to kiss Noiz again, which Noiz happily obliged, while his hands worked on rubbing against Noiz’s dick. Noiz was already hard when he touched his erection – hot, and definitely aroused. If he was to continue pumping, perhaps if he was to rub it harder and faster, he might even be able to make Noiz come just like that.

But no. This wasn’t it. Noiz had given him too much agony in sex for him to end things so easily. He was going to let Noiz taste the same sensations he’d pushed upon him.

With that thought, he brought his hand to his own dick, bringing it to press against Noiz’s, then rubbing both of them together. Noiz’s piercings felt amazingly good on him. Unconsciously, he’d pushed his sensitive spot against the metal material, finding moans almost spilling from his lips before he grasped hard onto Noiz’s shoulder to stop himself from doing exactly that.

His hand was damped with their pre-cum then, he could already see Noiz’s darkened lust in his eyes when he met his gaze again; it’s like staring at a sleeping beast, hidden beneath those striking pair of lime-green eyes, waiting to attack and devour him completely. He shook his head. He was about to be distracted again. He was about to imagine how good it’d feel to have Noiz taking over, hovering over him, touching on places that would feel the best for him. And how good it was to have Noiz thrusting into him, rubbing on his dick at the same time, giving him the multiple stimulations he very much loved. 

He was getting shivers from the mental imagination alone. He took another deep breath. Today wasn’t about him. He had a mission tonight – and he’d curse at himself if he was to fail it again.

“Are you okay?”

Noiz’s hot breath elicited a tremble from Aoba’s dick, totally reacting to his voice. He frowned and, pushing Noiz back onto the bed again, he grabbed the bottle of lube from the bedside table, spreading a handful of it onto his palm and brought his hand to his back.

“Ah…” His voice leaked out of his own control. He snapped his eyes shut, his body slick with body liquid as he pushed two fingers into him, pulling them out and pushing in again. Again and again. He was so engrossed in the sensation of fingering himself that he didn’t notice Noiz’s hand was on his dick, rubbing as he opened himself up. 

“You know… I’m not used to not doing anything.”

He could hear Noiz’s whispers, dark and lustful, but his strength was quickly losing him, he was at the brink of coming when he finally pulled himself back to reality again, slapping Noiz’s hand away at the same time as he pulled his fingers out.

“I said, no touching,” he spelled through breathy tone.

“Sure,” Noiz pulled his hand away, having both of his hands on Aoba’s waist instead. “This, at least.”

Aoba heaved a sigh. It’s not like Noiz was doing anything at all, to be honest. He probably just needed something to hold onto; and Aoba understood that feeling extremely well.

Without saying anything, he shifted to position Noiz’s dick against his wet hole, all ready to take Noiz in. And, with just one transitory exchange of gaze, he released his weight, feeling Noiz’s dick spreading him from the inside, small groans escaped his lips as he tried to get used to the sensation.

Noiz’s piercings rubbed against his inner walls, the way he loved it, the way he guided it to. He was totally in control, he was moving all by himself, while Noiz lied, simply holding onto him and watching him without moving a single inch.

“Noiz…” His name leaked from his tongue. It was good, too good; he pushed Noiz in deeper, and deeper, the skin-against-skin sound reverberating in the room, intensified by the wet sound of his slippery inside rubbing against Noiz’s dick. And soon, he was no longer in the state to control his own voice; he let his moans loose, hearing Noiz’s low groans at the same time, and feeling his own climax accumulating on tip of his own erection.

This was no good, he thought in a hazy daze. There must be something with Noiz’s body that was making him feel this way. It’s as if his body was totally succumbing to Noiz, as if all rational thoughts were discarded the moment their bodies came into contact with each other. He no longer cared when Noiz sat up, embracing the whole of his body, and resting his head against Aoba’s shoulder, where he could hear Noiz’s moans the clearest.

They were deep and arousing and everything that was a sign of Noiz letting his composure off. It was painfully seductive. He wanted to see more of Noiz in this state; he wanted Noiz to lose himself in him, in the sensations he was giving him. Stimulated by that intention, he moved faster, his waist sore from the intense motions. He clenched harder onto Noiz, controlling his own climax with huge difficulties, and biting on every inch of skin he could reach of Noiz, just so he could make Noiz come first.

He truly believed that he was still in control, that Noiz was the one losing himself first this time. He felt the sense of achievement in him. Noiz was about to come soon. He could feel it – the pulses of Noiz in him, how hard he’d become, and how his punctuated thrusts were only leading to his climax.

Yet.

“Aoba.”

His body was overwhelmed by electric shocks. He jolted, his own climax hitting him out of nowhere. Biting hard on Noiz’s shoulder to sustain his strangled moans, he felt Noiz coming in him too, just about the same time as he did.

What… was that? What just happened? Did Noiz say something? He could vaguely remember. As he came down from the high, he patted Noiz on the back of his head, still clinging onto him as he breathed heavily. 

Noiz wasn’t even in control this time but yet, Aoba felt as though he’d have Aoba in control the entire time they were making love. He didn’t need to do much. All that he needed to do was to embrace Aoba like this, to portray emotions that he had never been able to show. All that he needed to do, was to tell Aoba again and again of how much he yearned for Aoba, and how much everything Aoba was doing to him meant to him that was more than enough to overwhelm Aoba.

He laughed a dry chuckle. There’s no winning Noiz if that’s the case, then. Noiz was and would always be his weak spot. It’s no longer the matter of his pride. If his pride was the price for him to be able to see Noiz feeling as much as he could, then… he guessed it’s worth it after all.

So much for wanting to make Noiz come first. But. 

He guessed that didn’t matter anymore. And with a relieved sigh, he hugged Noiz again, slowly falling asleep, in the hands of warmth, of the aftermath of Noiz’s scattering emotions.


	109. One & Only; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s only one life for them and they’re going to make it right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing NoiAo always makes me cry and this ficlet was no exception. Yet another personal favourite. All I want is for them to be happy /_;

Happily ever after – A concept so far yet so near; an idea that’s both a distant tale and a belief to them. If they were to ask each other how far did they think they could bring their relationship to, it’d be the same as asking each other how far did they believe that they could live. No one ever knew the answer to any of their questions. They cherished the present and never thought too much about the future. Whatever happened would happen and it wasn’t their call to make. Taking things by tiny steps, they’d come to acknowledge that there’re things that were never within their control and if anything that was beyond believable was to happen, all they could do was stand firm on their grounds and confront it as they always did.

They shared no tags; they could never call themselves as friends, lovers, nor partners. They were just each other’s and they knew that from the very day they risked their life for each other – for a stranger whom they never knew enough of – that there was something beyond their own control that had attracted them to each other.

But, despite so, every ten years, they’d find themselves standing in front of each other, holding each other in their hands, with gaze fixed intensely at each other as they muttered the same ‘I do’ to each other. Ten years after ten years; they could no longer remember whose idea it was – perhaps it was both of theirs, perhaps it was a joke taken real – but all they knew was that they’d never forget to reassure each other again when the tenth year stroked.

And, before they knew it, it was the fourth time they stood in front of each other again, still smiling, eyes still twinkling with unmistakable light and heart still firmed with everything they’d promised each other – and again.

“I honestly never thought you’d take this seriously,” Aoba chuckled. Noiz’s hands were just a tad rough, just a tad bigger than his; he remembered being overly conscious over this very fact when he first noticed it, frowning at it, pouting when Noiz spelled it out loud, but now, he felt none of those. These were the very pair of hands that had supported him when he needed it, it was also the very same pair of hands which he’d held onto when Noiz almost tripped and collapsed. This very pair of hands – it was no longer as strong as before, it was covered with hints of wrinkles, of old age. It hurt to see, to feel, to acknowledge the very fact that time waited for no one and eventually, it’d be their time to bid their second farewell with each other.

“You’re underestimating me,” Noiz returned with a smile. When the corners of his lips curved, Aoba could see the wrinkles spread on the corners of his eyes. His face, once coarse, was now even more so. He wanted so much to touch it, to feel Noiz’s very skin texture on his fingers but all he could manage to do was held firmer onto Noiz’s hands, swallowing his sobs and attempting very hard to contain himself.

“It’s not like you’ve been predictable yourself,” he teased with a smirk. And he meant it. Everything Noiz said, far-fetched or not, sounded like a tease, a promise that was way too overpromising despite knowing the extent Noiz was willing to go for Aoba. Perhaps it wasn’t Noiz’s fault after all. Perhaps it was all him – he couldn’t quite believe how far he’d come with Noiz, and how far more could they walk by each other’s side. His survival was a miracle; it’s what his grandmother had been telling him. He couldn’t tell when he’d malfunction, and when would he break down. He wouldn’t know when he’d find himself not being able to wake up anymore, and he never knew when his time was up as an experiment himself. There were too many mysteries about his body that he’d never known. He felt like a time bomb – like something was bound to explode from within him one day and he’d find himself in a dream; a long, long dream.

Perhaps Noiz could see it in his eyes because then, he’d leaned forward to kiss him on his forehead, his hand leaving his, stretching backwards to twirl on the tip of his high ponytail before it came to rest on the back of his head.

“If ever, I’d be the one to go before you, so don’t worry.”

He knew it was a joke. Noiz loved saying this to him. It reminded him of the time when he never cared if he could be dead or that he never cared to stay alive. It reminded him of the Noiz when he could feel no pain, no emotions, until he broke his walls, forcing his way in and ultimately triggering the humanity back into him. It felt like a distant past; a story that once happened in their past life. It didn’t feel real.

It didn’t feel real standing here with Noiz again, about to recite their fourth recurrent vow – a reassurance they’d made for each other ever since they first signed the pact.

“Please,” he mumbled, already hearing the quiver in his own tone. “Don’t… ever think about it.”

He knew Noiz had a point, though. Enduring years of being unable to feel pain had exposed Noiz to circumstances that’re too late to be fixed. He never noticed it himself – he was perfectly normal; from the outside, at least. And It was when he finally spilled the beans about his left arm, about all the injuries in the past that could possibly have left a long-term after-effect that it dawned upon Aoba that he wasn’t the only time bomb after.

He chuckled upon that thought. Noiz had brought his lips towards him as they indulged in the peaceful solitary between them, his hand pressing hard on the back of his neck, stopping him from escaping. They took languid time engrossed in the familiar yet nostalgic scent of each other, feeling each other’s warmth, the sound of pulses, alongside the gentle breeze of happiness.

This was all they ever asked for. They never asked for immortality, they never asked to outlive the other. They only asked for now – when they could hold each other in their hands, feeling the presence of each other, reminding each other that they’re no longer alone, and lastly, reassuring each other that they would never be alone again.

“We’re similar, aren’t we?” Aoba whispered in between kisses; something he wanted to tell Noiz, something he wanted to tell himself. “We’d grown up feeling empty, with important things being taken away from us. We’d never wanted to acknowledge that we were lonely even though we really were. We’d… been trying to be strong for too long.”

Noiz hummed in agreement. If they’d never met each other, they’d never come to know about this very fact of theirs after all. If they’d never been involved with each other, they’d never know how it felt to have that very missing piece in their heart being filled by each other – a person they’d been unconsciously searching for. 

Taking a deep breath, Aoba kissed Noiz again, then brushing the tips of their noses together before he broke into a warm smile.

“C’mon, it’s time for that reassurance both of us need again.”

Noiz followed his smile. Holding his hands again, he took one of it up, kissing the back of it, before he took a deep breath himself.

Aoba waited, all the while fixing his eyes on his husband. He wore suit that was sleek and white, a view that was magnificently beautiful to his eyes. His hair was combed back, making his pair of lime-green eyes to appear all the more striking than they already were. When he smiled, it was the familiar smirk he’d always pull on Aoba, something Aoba had come to remember very painfully of him ever since they first met, even though the meaning of it could be different than before now. 

Despite the cruelty of age, nothing seemed to have changed. They’re still the same. Noiz was still the same brat he knew, he was still the same big brother Noiz knew. But above all, they’re still connected in the same way, their feelings, their emotions, every thought they held towards each other remained unchanged, perhaps even stronger.

“I take you as you are, loving you from the past, who you are now, and who you are yet to become. I promise to listen to you and learn from you, to support you and accept your support. I will celebrate your triumphs and mourn your losses as though they were my own. I will love you and have faith in your love for me, through all our years and of all life would bring us.”

Noiz paused, closing his eyes, just momentarily, before he opened them again, then continue as Aoba nodded.

“I love you unconditionally and without hesitation. I accept you as you are, and I offer myself in return. As I have given you my hand to hold, I will also give you my life to keep. And today, once again, I promise you, that I will…”

Noiz stopped, merely staring at Aoba, all the while with Aoba smiling at him. He grasped Noiz tightly in his hands, biting on his lip when he noticed the glimmer in Noiz’s eyes. Then, he tiptoed, kissing Noiz gently on the lips, before he whispered a quiet “I’m listening.”

Noiz closed his eyes again. And, with another deep breath, he continued, sounding more determined than before.

“And today, once again, I promise you, that I will cherish this life of mine, and that I’ll never let it slip before yours.”

Aoba’s smile widened at the end of Noiz’s speech. With several nods, he swallowed down his tears, waiting for Noiz to continue.

“Will you give yourself to me? Will you allow me to be by your side until the end of our life?”

The pause between them stretched then. There were many things they wanted to tell each other – things that they’d told each other before, things that they’d never told each other – but all that they could do was stare at each other in their eyes until when Aoba heaved a sigh that the silence was broken.

“I will. I take you, Noiz, as my partner, as a companion who would walk the rest of my life with me. And I promise to respect you and cherish you as an individual, an equal, knowing that we are not complete, but complement each other. I promise you to take you for who you are, and in return, believe that you will take me for who I am.”

With that, Aoba kissed Noiz; no longer the light pecks they’d given each other but deep, passionate kisses that was meant to intoxicate each other. In return, Noiz embraced Aoba in his arms, hugging his small body, bearing urge to protect so intense it was hard to breathe.

He wondered if life would ever be different if they’d never met each other? Perhaps he would’ve died by the roadside, like he always thought he would. Perhaps he’d never be able to feel emotions so intense like this, despite not being able to in the first place.

Aoba was the person who’d brought wonders into his world. Aoba was the person who’d exposed him to the impossibilities. And above all, Aoba was the person who’d told him that he’s human, that he’s different yet indifferent, and Aoba was the person who’d given him a reason to be alive, despite his very own condition.

He never asked for a long life, he never asked to live a peaceful life. All he’d ever asked for – was to be able to hold Aoba like this, for as long as he could, as long as life permitted them.


	110. Snip!; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things that Noiz noticed about Seragaki Aoba Part Infinity.

There were a lot of things he noticed about Seragaki Aoba when he first met him. Apart from his astounding Rhyme history, Seragaki Aoba’s entire appearance, alongside his compelling attitude was a league he never thought he would ever come to face. He’d come across people who’d often cross the wrong path with him but he’d never quite met someone like Seragaki Aoba; totally fearless, the gleam in his eyes a perfect indication of a strong figure – in ways perhaps in a definition that wasn’t Noiz’s to claim.

They were all distractions and he knew that he shouldn’t be caught up with things that held no significance to his motive. Organizing information into compartments and discarding useless details were his strength. And for a long time, he thought that he had all of them in control, that every other trivial detail about Seragaki Aoba had been gotten rid of and was no longer hindrance to his rational decision-making.

That was what he thought.

Until when he finally resided with this very person, under the same roof, that it came to his realization that those details were never discarded after all. Out of his own conscious, those very details had been stored, quietly and safely, in one corner of his brain; like a treasure box, like a hidden compartment that was so sacred he refused to touch it just because he was afraid that he’d contaminate it.

Little by little, these seemingly frivolous information slipped back into his conscious mind, revived from the depth of his thoughts and by the time he came to notice, the threat of these details had landed an impactful blow on him.

Just like that.

His feelings towards Aoba was crystal-clear. There was no name he could put onto it but he doubted there’s anything at all that he could use to label their relationship. Aoba didn’t seem to be at all concerned about this; living with Noiz was a step obvious enough for the both of them to tell them where each of them stood in their life. Residing under the same roof was a huge step of its own – it was one that had pulled their distance closer, in ways that they didn’t anticipate. Circumstances like societal discrepancies, family pressure and even climate difference were things that they were prepared to face. But above all, they could never ever be prepared for what that could come to happen from within them – things like how it felt to wake up to the most precious person in their life sleeping just right beside them, or how it felt to confront each other’s feelings in ways that were both a physical and emotional sense. They weren’t prepared for the overwhelming crush of emotions they were to face when they came to look into each other’s eyes, finding a different glint in them that they had no idea of, nor they were prepared to hold each other in their arms, listening to their heartbeats, finding new emotions and new physical details about each other.

That was the wonder of staying with Seragaki Aoba. That was what that had opened the door to more impossibilities that they never thought was possible.

As he sat on the dining table, he stared as Aoba moved around in the kitchen, busying himself with the preparation of dinner, and frequently giving him a pout alongside a thin frown whenever he noticed that Noiz was staring. All Noiz did was releasing a small hum, then a smirk, that immediately had Aoba looking away again. He knew how self-conscious Aoba was, but the reason behind why he was being so bleak at Noiz was probably because he knew that Noiz was analyzing him from the inside-out again. And soon, he’d expect Noiz’s out-of-the-world comment, on things that held no significance whatsoever, testing his patience and constantly refraining himself from throwing the frying pan at his direction.

“Your–”

“Please keep quiet until I’m done with frying this egg if you don’t want it on your face.”

Noiz did as he was told. Falling silent, his eyes remained on Aoba’s back, the searing gaze sent chills down Aoba’s spine.

Once he’s down with the egg, he looked over his shoulder again, then quickly looked away the moment he met eyes with Noiz. He let out a light cough, wiping his hands on his apron then raising his hands with an intention to pull his ponytail off when he felt a pair of hands on his.

Surprised, he looked back, finding Noiz’s face right by his before he took an instinctive step backwards to pull their distance apart.

“Keep it,” Noiz said in a tone one octave lower than usual.

“Don’t tell me this has been what you are trying to say…” Aoba glowered.

“Hm?” Noiz hummed. “Is your egg done, by the way?”

“Huh? Yeah,” Aoba said, casting a quick glance at the frying pan just to make sure.

“Can I speak now?” Noiz asked again, still standing close with Aoba.

“I guess so…” Aoba trailed. He’s done cooking anyway. There didn’t seem to have any dangerous tools around him that he could use to kill a man so he thought everything should be safe. He took his apron off, hanging it aside, then turned around to properly face Noiz.

“So, what kind of observation have you found out today, Mr.Noiz?” he teased.

“One,” Noiz responded with a smirk. He paused, leaning towards Aoba, one hand tilting Aoba’s neck to one side as he brought he face close to his neck, licking along it. “You have very attractive neck.”

“Uh… Uhuh…”

“It’s dangerous, though. You’re fair, if I am to leave marks here, everyone would know what happened.”

“Then don’t,” Aoba spelled through gritted teeth.

“Not going to. Yet,” Noiz confirmed with a satisfying sigh. He pulled himself away from Aoba, then raising a hand to touch on the knotted part of Aoba’s hair, where his ponytail was put into place.

“Two,” he continued, pulling provocatively on the rubber band. “Your hair has grown longer.”

“Oh, now that you mentioned it.” With that, Aoba twirled the end of his hair as well, as if measuring its length. “I guess so. I haven’t gotten it trimmed since… I came here?”

“That’s half a year,” Noiz commented, the tone of disbelief clear in his voice.

“Well, yeah,” Aoba agreed. “I’m not used to have someone else cutting my hair, to be honest.”

“How did you do it back in Midorijima?”

“I used to cut it myself,” Aoba answered. He combed the long strands of his hair with his fingers; he was sure that it was waist-length now if he was to put it down. “I’m sure you know about this but you see, it used to hurt even if I’m just touching it like this.”

Noiz nodded. He was well aware of it, but Aoba hadn’t been mentioning much about it anyway, the information about nerves on his hair was limited in his brain capacity. He wasn’t sure if it was his place to probe on it, even.

“Did it hurt if you cut it yourself then?”

“A bit,” Aoba responded. “I don’t think it’ll hurt now, though. So maybe I should get a haircut one of these days.

“But you aren’t used to having someone else cut your hair,” Noiz repeated.

“That’s right,” Aoba chuckled. “I could cut it myself but,” he paused, flicking a playful gaze at Noiz’s direction. “There’s a first to everything, right?”

For some reason, a thin frown had appeared in between Noiz’s eyebrows. Catching Aoba in surprise, he was about to ask but Noiz had then twirled his fingers around Aoba’s hair, his free hand raised to pull the band off the knot.

Aoba’s hair flowed; it wasn’t entirely messy, the layering of it was still beautiful, perhaps all it needed was a quick trim and a shorten of length.

If that’s so…

“I can do it.”

“Eh?”

“I can cut it for you,” Noiz repeated.

“W-wait, wait, wait a minute, Noiz, you’re saying that you want to cut my hair for me?” Aoba shook his hands vigorously in front of Noiz, his eyes widened in surprise.

“Is there a problem?” Noiz’s frown deepened.

“No, I mean…”

“So you’re saying you’d rather a stranger cut your hair for you than having me,  _your partner_ , to cut it for you?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“There’s no problem,” Aoba raised his voice as he put his hands on Noiz’s shoulders. “If you want to cut it, then I’ll let you. I’m just surprised. That’s all.”

Noiz perked a suspicious eyebrow, then, his expression softened before he let out a soft sigh. Aoba, however, had started grinning. He ruffled Noiz aggressively on his hair, his laugh louder with every passing second.

“Seriously, brat, you need to keep that emotion in check.”

“What emotion?” Noiz asked, sounded obviously displeased.

“That  _jealousy_  of yours,” Aoba smirked.

Noiz looked away then, but Aoba was quick to press both of his hands on his face, pushing it so that Noiz was staring right into his eyes.

“You can do whatever you want, you can tell me whatever you want. But I won’t deny that it’s cute seeing you acting like this.”

“Wha–”

“Okay then!” Aoba interrupted his words. “I guess I’d need some mental preparation if my hair stylist is going to be my partner. Ah,” he stopped on his way out. “How about asking Koujaku for some advice? Perhaps he’d be able to give you some good tips.”

With that said, Noiz launched towards him. His fingers finding the loose strands of Aoba’s hair on the nape of his neck, he pressed his lips against it, kissing slowly, then sucking hard enough to leave a mark.

“Ah…! You–”

“Now no one could cut your hair for you without noticing this anymore,” Noiz ended with a flick of tongue against the kiss mark. “Please look forward to your next hair-trimming session.”

As Aoba stood rooted on the spot, one hand pressing on the back of his neck, he stared as Noiz walked away, into the room, probably looking up on ways to make a good haircut. He smiled with a sigh, then, shaking his head several times, he walked into his own room, about to text Koujaku for some advice.

For Noiz.


	111. Dear Aoba; General

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dear Aoba, if there’s one thing I could tell you, it’s…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Putting this back up since I lost it once year ago. Still relevant, still love it. Please stay happy, Aoba. You deserve them all :’)

Visiting Koujaku’s mom changed things. For one, Aoba felt as if he’d finally discovered the one part of Koujaku he’d never known. He knew that there were probably many other things that he had yet to know about Koujaku and that they probably needed more time than they thought to catch up with each other. But there was always a first step to everything and especially when the very person he was dealing with was  _Koujaku_ , he knew that there was nothing he could do besides giving each other more time.

It was fine, really. They had all the time in their world now anyway.

Koujaku was serious about starting his very own shop, though. It was a step Aoba deemed to be important – one that was even life-changing. And it was definitely a step that was a loud pronunciation of how Koujaku had finally decided to settle down; with himself, and also, more importantly, with Aoba.

So when Koujaku reiterated his intention to Aoba again, Aoba merely smiled at him, giving him aggressive pats on the shoulder before he promised him that he’d do all he could to assist him.

All Koujaku did was returned his smile. But that was enough; more than enough for Aoba to know that that was all Koujaku needed to hear from him.

Aoba wasn’t the only one being helpful, though. There were also Benishigure, Mizuki and his entire Dry Juice team, even Haga-san and Yoshie-san alongside Tae who had offered to lend a hand to him. No amount of appreciation was enough for them to express exactly how much their help meant to them. At times when they were finally left alone, Aoba would often find Koujaku staring out of the window, deep thoughts written all over his face before he let out a hefty sigh, which often resulted in Aoba punching him jokily on the shoulder.

“You’re worth it,” Aoba would always say, and Koujaku would  _always_  return that very statement with a bitter smile.

“I know,” was what Koujaku would say, but Aoba knew him enough to understand that he didn’t wholly mean what he said. Koujaku had his own struggle and it was impossible for someone to turn over a new leaf, let alone change his entire mind set in merely a few months’ time. So all Aoba could do was hug him from the back, press his face against Koujaku’s broad shoulder before he closed his eyes, a gesture that was more than enough to comfort Koujaku.

The day when their shop was officially opened was a whole noxious impact of its own. It was surreal standing right in front of a physical store, staring at the name of the shop that they’d put up together, sweat beading on their foreheads but yet with big smiles on their faces that they couldn’t stop throwing at each other. Congratulatory words were showered on them for the entire day. And while they were busy greeting guests, they ultimately ended up slumping on a couch in their very own shop, when everyone had headed back and when they finally earned a good alone time for themselves.

“Aoba,” Koujaku started, breaking the silence in the space.

“Hm?” Aoba responded, eyes closed, visibly exhausted.

“Thank you.”

Aoba did nothing but smile. He’d received too many thank yous from Koujaku, so many to the extent that he no longer knew how to respond to them. So instead, he leaned his head against Koujaku’s arm, feeling Koujaku slanting his head on top of his at the same time.

They were both dog-tired, and not before long, he heard slow, quiet snores from Koujaku that he opened his eyes, lifting his head just enough to catch Koujaku’s sleeping features.

He was worn-out himself, but he choose to stay awake, glancing around the space they’d both worked so hard for – a space that was the result of  _their_ determination; and also a space that spelled of nothing but a strong will to move forward with each other by their side.

He didn’t want to end up sleeping in this place with Koujaku until the next day, but he didn’t have the heart to wake Koujaku up either. He deserved a transitory rest, and Aoba would look after him while he recharged. Finding himself bored, he switched his Coil open, was about to check his text messages when his eyes brightened, a familiar name blinking at him from the screen – a name that had his heart skip a beat:

* * *

“P! P! Message from Aoba, message from Aoba! Open?”

Noiz put his stack of document by one side, stared at his bouncing AllMate before he let out a dainty sigh, accompanied by a similarly light smile.

“Open up.”

“ _What do you want for dinner? I’m thinking of beef stew._ ”

Noiz released a small chuckle. Aoba didn’t even need to ask him if he already had something he wanted in mind. Above all, he already  _knew_  that Noiz would agree to anything he was to suggest. Noiz wasn’t the best expert when it came to good food. Aoba wasn’t either, but he was willing to explore with Aoba and if Aoba wanted to do just that with him, there was no way he would close door to that suggestion.

“ _Beef stew it is, then. Do you need me to buy anything on the way home?_ ” he replied, tapping the tip of his pen on the table while he considered, mind already making a list of ingredient that would be needed to make a pot of beef stew.

“ _Would you mind getting the spices? Anything you like._ ” Aoba’s reply was short; but that was enough.

Anything he wanted, huh? That was a challenging task of its own. It was like playing a lucky draw – if he was to buy spices Aoba was fond of, he’d find himself being greeted by a pair of glinting eyes alongside a wide grin that would effortlessly made him feel all the more achieved as well. But, if he was to get the one that Aoba wasn’t very much fond of, he’d find himself facing a bitter smile, perhaps even a ruffle on his hair before he felt his heart sink, knowing that Aoba was probably trying to make the best out of the bad decision he’d made.

He’d like to avoid the latter, if possible. But Aoba placing the option in his hands was equivalent to him wanting Noiz to make the option  _he_  preferred so he probably shouldn’t think too much about it. Sinking against his chair, he turned around, facing the huge window in his office, his thoughts wandering fast and tedious.

He’d thought about this for the longest time, but he never found the chance to execute this plan. This was too sudden, perhaps even unnecessary. But, maybe he had just the best solution to this matter.

Maybe.

“Welcome home!”

The smell of cooked food was exceptionally strong when he walked into the house. Immediately greeted by a perky grin, he raised the shopping bag in his hand, then pushing it towards Aoba. Aoba nodded with a smile at first, then peeking into the bag, where Noiz noticed how the smile gradually faded into a less-bright one and a small frown making its way in between Aoba’s eyebrows.

Ah, he had done it. He knew this would happen.

“Ah, well… Noiz…?” Aoba started, lifting his head up and was about to spill his thoughts when Noiz took a step towards him, wrapped a hand around his waist and shut his remaining words out with a kiss.

“Hey,” he mumbled against Aoba’s lips.

“What’s that all about?” Aoba pouted, visible tint of pink on his face.

“I’ve bought you something. But before that, sorry for messing things up.”

“Messing things… up?” Aoba tilted his head.

“Yeah,” Noiz reaffirmed. Lifting Aoba’s hand up, he sneaked one hand into his pants pocket, pulling what looked like a ring box out of it.

“Noiz, this—“

“It’s not what you think it is,” Noiz chortled. “Not yet.”

While Aoba was driven into a state of confusion, Noiz opened the box, revealing a necklace with a well-carved silver bunny pendant on it.

“Noiz, what is—“

“Thought this should be enough to compensate for my faults,” Noiz smiled. Pulling their distance apart, he took the necklace out of the box, turning Aoba to face the opposite side and wore the necklace for him.

“Why are you doing this?” Aoba asked as long last. With Noiz’s weight against his back, he looked at the bunny pendant he’d lifted up with his hand, head filled with thick layers of confusion.

“You like rabbits, don’t you?”

“ _You_  like rabbits, not me,” Aoba gave Noiz a stare over his shoulder.

“You don’t like them?” Noiz muttered, his voice visibly down.

“N-no, not that, I mean… You like it way more than I do, no? Besides, why are you even doing this?”

“I bought the wrong spices,” Noiz admitted.

“Huh?”

“Those aren’t what you like, no?” Noiz pointed his chin towards the bag, where Aoba had placed by the shelf when Noiz pulled him over.

“H-huh?” Aoba stared at Noiz, eyes wide, where both of them exchanged silence for a brief moment before he broke out into a loud laughter. “No, no, no, you got it all wrong!”

Noiz released Aoba then, perking a curious eyebrow.

“You didn’t buy anything wrong. Didn’t I mention to buy what you like? I don’t mind anything you are to buy.”

Noiz was still looking at Aoba suspiciously when Aoba ruffled him on the hair, his grin wider than before.

“I’m serious. I’m just a bit concerned if I could cook well with them because I’ve never worked with them before. It’s nothing like what you think it is.”

Sometimes he doubted if he really understood Aoba at all; but it was also times like this that he realized that Aoba was indeed a person too unpredictable for him to figure out – even when he was  _sure_  that he knew exactly everything about Aoba.

“You sure?” he asked, just to make sure.

“Uh huh,” Aoba nodded. “Now you just… go and sit down and relax while I get things sorted out, okay?”

“Don’t you need hel—“

“Nope, nope! Off you go, bunny boy,” Aoba pestered, pushing Noiz out of the space and into the living room before he headed back to the kitchen.

With a bitter smile, he looked at the bunny pendant again, wondering how far his boyfriend had gone when it came to comforting him. Sometimes, he thought he was the one thinking too much about things. But when it came to gestures Noiz did for him like this, it dawned upon him that perhaps they were in the same level after all.

While he attempted to get back to work, now all determined to make things work for the both of them, his Coil rang, with Ren jumping onto the counter.

“Aoba, a text message.”

“Who is it from?” Aoba asked, unloading the items Noiz had bought onto the counter.

When he heard no response from Ren, he stopped, turning around to meet his AllMate’s gaze.

“What’s wrong? Who sent the message?”

“It’s—“

And when Aoba finally took a look at what Ren was showing him, he almost dropped the bottle of spices on the floor, his heart beat loudly in his ears.

He never thought he’d see this name ever again:

* * *

“Hmmmm…”

He stared at the ornaments in his hands, eyebrows knitted together. He was sure he’d gotten better with this by now but his own judgment wasn’t what he could completely believe in either. He looked up, watched Mink concentrating on his own work before he shifted his gaze back to his own masterpiece again, at a loss of what to do.

“Done?”

Mink’s voice almost made him jump. Looking up again, he nodded, prompting Mink to move towards him then scrutinize the elusive ornaments he’d made from scratch in his hands.

“Pretty good.”

“You think so?” he broke into a wide grin.

Mink nodded. His words were little, but they always meant big for Aoba; and when it came to things like this, he’d definitely choose to trust Mink better than himself.

“We’re done for the day,” Mink announced. Aoba took a quick peek at the ornaments he was working, impressed by how fast Mink was able to make such delicate items before he stood up and followed Mink into their house.

It had been a year since he started residing in the house with Mink. There were times when comfortable silence spread across time when they did nothing but indulge in the cosiness of having each other by their side, but most of the times, Aoba had come to learn of ways to open himself up better, to speak his mind out when needed, even without Mink to question him for answers he wanted to tell.

It was amazing how he could come to change an impression of a person so drastically as if he’d never known the person from the first place.

“Sleepy already?” Mink asked. They were once again, in their very own contented leisure when Aoba started dozing off. He quickly opened his eyes, then shaking his head.

“No, not really.”

“You can sleep first if you want,” Mink said simply, raising his coffee cup once again, his eyes stuck on the book he’d been reading.

“It’s fine,” Aoba said instead, snuggling closer to him. There must be some sort of magic in the fireplace, the sound of cracking fire, the soothing air breezing across the house. It must be the reason why he found himself drowsing off even though he was  _sure_  that he was perfectly conscious before they ended up sitting in this space.

Mink said nothing then. Simply allowing him to do whatever he wanted, he returned to his book, feeling Aoba cuddling right next to him, his attention wavered just ever so slightly.

He once asked Mink about the books he read; he wanted to know more about Mink. But he needed time to properly understand Mink’s interest and he was totally fine with it. They had all the time in their world now, anyway, there was no need to rush.

Mink wouldn’t escape and disappear from his side again – there was no need for that anymore.

Bored, he flipped his Coil open, attempting to check if there was any messages that he haven’t read when the one inbox swept all of his drowsiness away.

* * *

“Thank you and please come again!”

Sending off the last of his customers, he slumped against his chair. It was the end of the day now and there was nothing left for him to do. Yet another day, yet another peaceful life; everything he’d wished for. He was now here, in Midorijima, living life as if nothing had changed from before. Except perhaps—

“Aoba-san!”

He immediately broke into a chuckle. Well, he wouldn’t say it’s perfectly peaceful now; but it wasn’t the type of noise he would mind and perhaps this was all for the best. He stood up, placed Ren into his bag, slung it over his shoulder then making sure that everything in the shop was well attended to before he opened the door, where he was instantly greeted by a smile so bright he thought he was staring into a sun.

“You’ve worked hard!” Clear greeted.

“And you’re on time as always,” Aoba teased. “What’s that? Grocery for Granny?” he asked, pointing at the bag in one of Clear’s hand.

“Yup! Tae-san said he’s making good food tonight.”

“What’s the occasion?” Aoba said, walking down the street with Clear, waving at acquaintances along the way.

“Hmmm… nothing, I guess. Oh, oh! Wait! To celebrate Aoba-san for working so hard!”

“Haha!” Aoba laughed out loud. “I’ve been doing this every day. Shouldn’t we be celebrating every day then?”

“That’s not a bad idea!”

“I’m just joking.”

Living with Clear had its perks – one of it being able to experience constant uplifting of mood in this way, something Aoba would need. Clear was like a personification of the sun, and sometimes Aoba wondered exactly how he managed to uphold this brightness of his at all times. Almost a year after residing with Clear, he’d seen him as nothing less human. Sure, he would have his breaking down moments but Aoba could easily fix it. If he can’t, he’d find ways to do it. There was literally no boundaries between them – even though both of them were well aware of the differences they came to possess, which Aoba had disregarded being nothing of those.

“Is everything okay?” Aoba asked, noticing their silence spread a bit too long for their preference.

“Hm? What do you mean?”

“Like, your body, anything at all.”

“Oh,” Clear stuttered. He took a moment to answer, which Aoba presumed that he was attempting to check if everything was intact. “Everything’s fine,” he said at long last.

“Let me know if anything feels out of place, alright?” Aoba urged. He’d been telling Clear this forever now but his biggest concern remained in how Clear would potentially hide things from him just so he wouldn’t worry him and he didn’t want to only discovering errors when everything was too late.

“I will,” Clear responded with a perky grin, which Aoba returned with a small smile of his own.

He never wanted to think about what they’d talked before. He never wanted to consider the day Clear would break earlier than any of them had anticipated. All that he could do now was consistent check-ups just so things like that won’t happen.

“Aoba-san?”

“Hmm?”

“Can we stop by Grandpa’s house? Just for a bit.”

Well, this was surprising. But Aoba was in no position to say no. Nodding, they turned their course, heading towards an outskirt area, where a lonely house stood.

For some reason, every time he was to enter the house, it gave him a weird sense of nostalgia, as if he’d known this place forever; which he knew wasn’t real. As he watched Clear fiddling with the items in the space, he looked around, scrutinizing every item in the house. They were all tantalising items he found himself being fond towards. They weren’t anything extravagant, but they properly documented the life of a determined researcher who once held heart bigger and kinder than anyone else.

He wished he had the opportunity to meet this person, so that he could thank him properly for believing in Clear and to bring him back to life.

“Aoba, a text message,” Ren broke his line of thoughts. Sitting on the bed, he shifted his AllMate out, ruffling his fur before he turned his Coil on.

Then, he realized, perhaps he wasn’t the only one possessing this kind of thought. Perhaps someone else out there – a person he’d never come to know – was thinking about the same thing as him as well.

And perhaps, this was the answer he was searching for, right on this very hologram screen:

* * *

There was nothing different with Ren, perhaps besides the fact that he now had his own arms and was perfectly  _human_  that was the biggest difference. Apart from that, Ren was still Ren, pretty much the same as how Aoba remembered him to be and he was grateful for that.

He’d never imagined Ren to be who he was, neither did he expect himself to be who he  _really_  was. The truth dawned upon him like a huge wave of tsunami, and even until today, he still found difficulties trying to swallow this very fact that he’d turned out to be less human than he had believed in.

But his grandmother, along with Ren, told him that regardless of what the truth really was, nothing changed and that Aoba was still  _Aoba_  and that should be all that mattered.

Which was true, anyway.

Sometimes he still felt surreal seeing Ren sitting in the corner of his room, reading books and starting to learn how to function as a  _human_  in this complicated world. He wanted to protect Ren, to teach him everything he could and he still wanted to be the person who could support him after all the support Ren had given him throughout these years. He knew that Ren probably didn’t mind much about this, that he was probably more than capable to take care of himself and there were definitely times when Aoba worried if he was pushing himself into matters too personal that he was starting to become an annoyance.

But Ren expressed nothing of those. He accepted everything sincerely, smiled at Aoba, patted Aoba on the head like how Aoba used to do to him; and before he knew it, Aoba realized that he’d been pushed back into relying on Ren as his biggest support pillar, as if it was the most natural thing to do.

“Aoba, are you okay?”

He must’ve noticed how Aoba was staring into space while he read.

“Ah, I’m fine, sorry, was thinking about stuff,” Aoba released a bitter smile.

“Is there anything wrong?” Ren asked, putting the book now and shifting himself to where Aoba sat.

“No, not at all,” Aoba shook his head. “Just wondering about how far we had come now.”

Ren fell silent then. Sitting right beside Aoba, he stroke Aoba’s cheek with a finger, then leaning in to peck it gently.

“Are you okay with this?”

“Huh? What are you talking about? Of course I’m okay.”

Ren said nothing after that. Joining Aoba to stare into a distance, he only fidgeted ever so slightly when he found Aoba intertwining their fingers together, then leaning his head against his shoulder.

“I wish I had more time to speak with Sei, that’s all.”

Sei. Aoba’s twin brother, whose presence was never known until right before the fall of the tower.

“He must feel relieved to be able to talk to you,” Ren comforted, not knowing what the right thing to say was.

“I hope so,” Aoba closed his eyes. “I wish we could spend more time together.”

What done was done and there was no way anyone could return and change history. Aoba had obeyed to Sei’s wish, that should be more than enough for him. While Ren caressed Aoba’s head, thinking about the right thing to say, his eyes brightened, suddenly finding a memory within him that he hadn’t been acknowledging since he regained his consciousness.

“Aoba, there’s something I need to tell you,” he said.

Aoba merely looked at him, curiosity evident on his face.

“Before I woke up in the hospital, I heard voices.”

“Wait, what?” Now Aoba was completely distracted.

“They were in my head, as if they were speaking to me.”

“Wait a minute…” Aoba trailed off at the end of his sentence. Ren’s body was Sei’s after all. Does this mean that part of Sei’s conscious still remained in Ren’s head.

Ren, however, closed his eyes, trying to search for the missing pieces, the faraway memory he used to remember to vividly in his head.

“It says…

> _Dear Aoba,_
> 
> _I know there are probably many questions in your head; questions that bug you, questions that keep you awake at night. I know you’re probably insecure at times, overly concerned over the unknowns, fearing that the steps you have taken weren’t the right ones._
> 
> _But, Aoba, all that I can tell you is that – there is no one but you who could take the steps for you. You’re your own best judge, and regardless of what decisions you are to make, I know that you would take full responsibility for yourself. Aoba, you’re always so sincere, so upfront, so honest, with everything you do. You’re the reason why everyone is attracted towards you. Your deepest core of you being you and you being the one person who puts others before yourself; those are precisely the reason why you’re here today, taking a step affected by no one else – a step you decide by yourself._
> 
> _Dear Aoba,_
> 
> _You’re too good for this world, but perhaps, it’s exactly why this world needs you. It doesn’t matter who you really are; it doesn’t matter who you were – what matters is that you have been changing lives simply being you and I think that’s the best thing you have ever done for yourself and for everyone you had come into contact with. So, Aoba, please go after your happiness. You deserve it and never let anyone tell you otherwise. You’re a fighter, but you fight for the right thing._
> 
> _And for that, I hope you true happiness, regardless of which path you are to choose._
> 
> _Captive Princess._


	112. Believe Me; Desire/Reason

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He thought he knows everything about him. But he knows nothing – he never knows anything.

You thought you were one. You thought it’s supposed to be like this ever since you were born. You shared the same body, same soul, and definitely the same mind. You were one. You were  _supposed_  to be one. And that’s why you thought you should cherish him. No, you  _wanted_  to cherish him. Ever since you had a conscious of your own, you’d always thought that  _he_  was part of you, yet a separate entity that should be protected. So you looked after him, barging in with opinions whenever you feel necessary, fighting off the other  _him_  when you felt threatened. You thought you’re doing the right thing. You thought balancing him, only making the right choices for him, was everything you needed to do.

You didn’t mind if it makes you the bad person. You didn’t mind if it makes you the bad influence. You have only one and  _one_  objective in this life and it’s him – it should always be him.

So how do you define if you’re doing the right thing, anyway? You’re desire and you’re the personification of impulse. You do what you  _think_ is right, and you based all your decisions on  _him_. But everyone told you that you’re wrong, that you’re only doing things that’s harming him, not helping him. They said you are making him into a worse person, that you’re destroying him. And you don’t understand. You don’t care what people think of you, but you cared when they tell you that you aren’t helping him. How does wanting to protect him from threats make him a bad person, you wonder? How does fighting for him, doing things you thought it’s the best turned him for the worse. You never understand. You didn’t want to understand. Everyone was a distraction. Everyone simply wanted to separate both of you. They never understood. They’d never know of this bond both of you shared. They weren’t you. They were not worth it.

And you thought you were doing the right thing – until even  _he_  decided to rule you out.

What did you do wrong?

What went wrong?

Since when did things go wrong?

_What is happening?_

You never knew the answers. You wanted to ask him. You desperately wanted to. You called out to him, screamed for him, simply wanting to  _talk_  to him, have him listen to you and just… sort things out. That’s all you wanted. You never wanted him to think badly of you. You never meant anything bad. You simply wanted to protect him in ways you felt the best. He’s not talking to you. He’s not acknowledging you. And that hurt – that hurt  _so much_  you started to wonder about the purpose of your existence.

You loved him. You knew it from the core of your heart. You loved him  _a lot_. So much.  _So, so much_. He had been your life and you knew that he’d  _always_  be the centre of your life. Yet, he didn’t need you. He discarded you. He left you in your dark, cold corner of your mind; only being able to see and to hear everything he’d done but you would never be able to reach other to him. It hurt. It hurt  _so much_.

And for a long time, you were still wondering what you did wrong to have made him hate you in this way. Then, you thought, perhaps you needed another way to have your words reach him – something like, a more forceful, aggressive way if that’s what that would work. You’re  _him_  after all. You shared the same body, same mind, same soul. You shouldn’t have to ask for his permission to use what’s  _yours_  after all.

You thought… you  _really_  thought that you’re doing the right thing. You simply wanted to talk, just as simple as that. But nothing was ever right for you. Nothing of what you have done seemed to be able to translate that simple message.

And you were done.

You were so done.

You never felt you could be so wrong as to consider that no one – including him – needed you anymore. You never thought you could be wrong. You were made of impulses and you were sure that you’ve gotten your hunches right. But you’re wrong. Yeah,  _you’re wrong_.

The truth slapped you in the face, hard and clear, when he held you in his hands, the skin-against-skin contact enough to make you feel as if your entire world had just crumbled into dust. Everything that you once believed in, everything you thought was the truth were thrown out of your world, just like that. You didn’t know what was right and what was wrong anymore.

You never thought you’d be overwhelmed by simply having someone muttering a quiet ”I’m sorry” to you. You never thought you needed it. You never thought how easy it could be just to have something so simple, so genuine, and everything could be right again.

You never imagined how he’d feel like if you were to touch him, just to feel him. But he’s warm, soft, smooth; he was everything you were. You were one after all. You were supposed to be one. And when he brought you into his arms, you thought you’d never needed reassurance this bad before.

“Let’s not separate ourselves from each other again,” he said. It’s the only words you needed to hear from him. He didn’t need to say anything else. In those words, they had acknowledgment, acceptance, reassurance. Everything you needed from him and more. You never knew how he managed to do it in such a simple, yet elegant way.

But he did. And that’s perhaps why you could never win him.

You were his slave, his master, you could be anything he wanted you to. But at the end of the day, you knew that you belonged to him. At the end of the day, you would still rage, still feel sad, but you’d always return to him.

You shared the same mind, same body, same soul. But you belonged to him.

Because even when you told yourself that he’s senseless, he’s dense, he’s nothing but lack of impulse, you  _trusted_  him. And that’s why you’d always forgive him, no matter how much he tended to stray away from you.


	113. Connecting Memories; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's only one way to define a forget-me-not.

Memories are intangible. They come and go and treat one’s brain like their own house. Memories are unreliable – they are elusive and the only thing that could prove their reliability is through physical elements: a person who’d gone through the same occurrence as them, for instance.

Even so, memories are vague. They aren’t exactly as what one would think, and they aren’t exactly as what one would anticipate. They would only exist in the best way a person wants it to be, and even so, they aren’t accurate. They would never be accurate. 

He doesn’t have memories of their pasts. All that Noiz has is mere darkness, alongside a lot of unpleasantness that are only the cause of his own self-conscious. He’s not normal; that’s what everyone tells him. But yet, the memories of those moments being alone, being forced into darkness, are what had built him into who he is today. It’s not a memory he’d like to remember, but it’s undoubtedly a memory he would thank for – for this is the reason why he’s strong today.

Seragaki Aoba has no memories of his past either – all that’s remained was a whole load of loneliness, pacified by his parents, then eventually by Koujaku, and in due course another round of solitary that was once the reason for him losing himself. His memories are patched, incomplete, but they’re his, and for all he knows, it’s the reason to why he’s able to withstand heavier impact now thanks to the lessons he learned from his past. He remembers a distinctive figure, swimming around his mind, talking into his ears – but that’s all. He knows he’s not enemy, and that he’s all he has, but he also knows that the future path is for him to walk on – by himself, and with another person – whom he knows lacks as much memories like he does.

First love comes in a form of intense waves. It hits you like it’s the most natural thing yet there’s nothing you can do to stop it. That’s how Noiz felt when he first experienced this wave. It’s like a hurricane, sweeping his coherent mind out of the window, having him to take time to settle down before the very fact of him falling in love dawns upon him. He never knows what love is, he never knows what he should do to recognize one. When it hits him, he can only attempt to feel it, just to feel the very same warm sensation falling upon him in ways that he couldn’t describe.

“Noiz.” There’s something different in the way Aoba calls his name. It consists of nothing judgmental, nothing that would suggest any fatal intentions, and all Noiz ever wants is to listen to the way Aoba calls his name again and again. And perhaps, he’d come to accept how he could be called by his real name again.

But ‘Noiz’. ‘Noiz’ is different – Noiz is him. Noiz is what Aoba has come to acknowledge of him. Noiz is Aoba’s impression. It’s the name that has been engraved into Aoba’s memory, into  _his_  memories, and the name that he wants to be remembered, despite the spiteful past behind it.

With Aoba, he comes to accept the impression of his name in his memory a tad better than before. With every call of his name, he comes to concede that he’s only human, and that he’s allowed to live, not only to survive. Aoba’s the one who’d taught him about living. Aoba’s the one who’d taught him about love. He never knows what love is. He never knows how it feels to be in love. But he knows how much Aoba means to him, and how much he wants to return Aoba’s affection to him.

Perhaps this is love, he wonders. Perhaps there’s no real definition of love after all. Perhaps this is how Aoba, then he, would come to define love. Does true love exist? True love – something so beautiful, something so miraculous, something that’s once a dream too far for him to achieve, something he never thought he deserved.

But yet – Aoba’s here, by his side. And  _that_  is the only true love he needs. Nothing else.

* * *

 

“Never thought I’d end up with a brat like you,” Aoba chuckles as he rubs a thumb against the back of Noiz’s hand. They sit, hand-in-hand, on the bed, heads propped against the bedhead as they flip through an album of what seems to be the accumulation of all of Aoba’s persistence.

“Regretting?” Noiz asks, a mean of joke.

“Nah,” Aoba brushes him off. His eyes stop on a page, staring at their happy miens during their wedding day – Theo almost crying, standing by Noiz’s side, and Koujaku slinging an arm around him, almost choking him. He remembers the day when they got married – when they officially called each other their husbands – and he remembers how everyone cheered for them, how they wished them happiness for their marriage. He recalls the concept of happiness, but he’s never able to define the concept of true love.

He wonders if Noiz knows, if he ever thinks about it, if it ever matters to him.

“Noiz,” he calls out, eyes still stuck on the photo album.

“Hmm?” Noiz responds with a meek hum, staring at where Aoba is gazing.

“Do you believe in true love?”

Noiz turns around, lime-green orbs meet light-brown.

“True love, huh?” he ponders, a question he’d been asking himself for the rest of his life. “Perhaps what matters more to me is being able to create all these memories with you.” He raises the photo album just slightly, instantly earning a snicker from Aoba.

“I promised you, didn’t I?” That summer night, that day when he’d heard how genuine Noiz wants to be with him – it’s the day when he realized how he  _really_ wants to be with Noiz, to grow with him, to be able to experience everything with him, regardless of if it’s a new experience or revisiting an old one. All of these are  _memories_ , and perhaps they’re also—

“ _True love_ ,” Aoba mutters. “These memories,” he closes the photo album, then leans against Noiz’s shoulder, sighing blithely upon feeling Noiz’s gentle strokes on his cheek. “These are all our true love.”

And he knows Noiz agrees – because they’re the same after all, despite how different they may seem to be. Do they need a definition for true love? Do they need more reassurances of how they’re meant to be with each other? Perhaps Noiz has the same insecurity. If not, he wouldn’t be finding forget-me-nots in their vases every once a while. It’s the first ever birthday present Noiz had given him, alongside a very delicate perfume and a white handkerchief.

He never asks why Noiz did what he do, but he knows it must be done with reason. Noiz is just like that – he’s hard for speech, but everything shows in his actions clear as day. He never exposes any weaknesses, and he never wants to be too dependent on Aoba. He’s exactly like Aoba, despite the different ways he’s to express it.

_Forget-me-not_. A flower Aoba never cared about, but a flower Aoba has come to care. Sometimes he wonders if it’s because of the fact that it reminds Noiz of him that he’s so tenacious with it? Or if it’s because Noiz is trying to tell him something that’s making him doing it so habitually? It’d become a flower that represents the both of them, even before they’d come to know it. It’s a flower that symbolizes of nothing but their love, their memories, and across time, it’d become the flower that connects them both together.

It’s a loud enunciation that tells each other that they’d be there for each other if they need it, that they’ll never forget about each other regardless of what is to happen. And even if it does, these memories they’d collected with each other, these experiences that they’d gone through with each other would always serve as a crucial reminder for them to fall into the right places again.

That’s just how they are.

Memories are intangible. They’re unreliable and they are easy to lose. They’re erroneous and are erasable. But that’s only if they’re a person of their own. With  _two_  persons going through the same occurrences together, there’s no way they’d misplace their memories, even though they may be inaccurate, or even though they’d come in patches.

Because at the end of the day, they’d hold each other in their hands, smile at each other, and reassure each other that they’re real, that everything they had gone through are real, that they’re not alone anymore, and cannot be alone anymore – and that true love does exist, simply because they exist.

It’s a fairylike tale, but everything is a miracle if they believe hard enough, and that’s Noiz and Aoba’s belief – for they’re simply two simple individuals searching for simple, genuine love.


	114. One; Aoba/Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything will be fine – that’s the one promise he could give him.

He’s unwanted.

It’s an impression he held within himself for the longest time ever, believing that he’s a mere hindrance, an existence that was nothing but a disturbance. He was suppressed, locked away, being seen as a threat.

He was used to all of these – he didn’t need empathy anyway, let alone sympathy; it’s fine if no one could understand the way he did things, he served no one anyway, all that he needed to do was to serve his purpose well.

That was all.

***

It was raining when he walked out of the house, eyes fixed on the pouring sky. Without another word, he walked out of the shelter of his house, raindrops fell on his face as a thin layer, each droplet aligned on his skin with just enough coldness to align his mind with the present. He could feel every drop clear as day, chills layered his skin as if attempting to become one with him. It’s a sensation he once experienced, but was never used to. Being in the darkness for too long had made him forget about light, and had the darkness become his home. Instead of the sun, this kind of weather suited him better – gloomy, wet, obscuring everything like it’s blanketing the world in a deceiving mist.

As he walked, the sound of splashing water resounded below his feet, moving on his own without any destination in mind.  _He_  told him he’s free to switch out whenever he wanted, that  _he_  was not going to restrain him in any way. He had given him the ultimate trust and recognition he’d always wanted.

Everything was returned to normal.  _Aoba_  had retrieved the balance that was once his – everything should be normal by now.

But why…

Why is he still feeling this sense of imbalance within him?

He pulled his hood over his damped hair, feeling just a bit less noisy than before when he stopped by an alley, now completely unoccupied thanks to the rain. He casted a quick glance at the deserted area, pulling his hood just a bit lower then stepping heavy footsteps into it.

Rhyme had become a past he no longer visited. The thrill of it still stirred his veins whenever he thought about it, but the excitement was no longer comparable to how he felt in this peaceful state of mind at the moment, waiting for time to arrive when he’d become one with  _Aoba_  and he’d no longer need to worry about being locked away or being seen as unneeded anymore. When he became one as  _Aoba_ , he’d be able to move in synchronization with  _him_ , he’d be able to feel what  _he_  felt, know what  _he_  knew, and be who he always wanted to be.

When he became one with  _Aoba_ …

There’d no longer be any distinctions between Desire, Reason and Restraint. Everything would be one and only one and that should be how it should be.

There would no longer be… a distinction.

He scowled, clenched his fists as he clicked his tongue. Turning around, he stuck his back into his pockets, wanting to leave.

Everything would be fine. Once he adapted himself to the mindset of them being synchronized with everything else, he would no longer feel this way. Everything would be fine.

Everything had to be right.

He was drenched from head to toe the moment he got back. Pulling himself off his jacket, he slumped on the bed, about to head back into the dark when he heard a voice, loud and clear, right beside his ears.

“ _Everything will be fine._ ”

He lifted a small smirk.

“Of course,” he responded. “We’ve settled things after all.”

Then, when he lied on the bed, closing his eyes, the voice turned louder, the image in his eyes came into clearer view. There’s a sort of warmth engulfing his body, something that was never his and would never be his.

“It’s fine.”

The next time he opened his eyes, he saw  _himself_  standing in front of him, still wearing the smile he was already more than familiar with. He wanted to return it but all he could do was stare, until when  _he_  walked over, caressing a slow finger along his cheek that he shivered a tad. Skin-against-skin sensation was never something he was unfamiliar with. But feeling  _his_  skin against his was probably something he’d yearned for, something out of his own knowledge.

He lifted a hand, pressing his palm against the back of  _his_  hand and leaned into  _his_  touch.

Ah… warm, soft. Everything that was a contrast to his, yet so very ironically his.

“You’ll be fine,”  _he_  said, inching closer, now with both hands on his face. “I’ll make sure of that.”

He never thought there’d come a day when he needed someone’s assurance, let alone  _him_  to be the person who could give him the best comfort. But he accepted it with no questions asked.

Something wasn’t quite right with him and he was way too aware of it. It all happened ever since the Platinum Jail incident, ever since they’d come to a mutual compromise of each other’s position. He didn’t feel at all like himself anymore, even though the core trait of his  _desirable_  self was still very much pronounced. He felt like  _him_ , he felt as if he could come to better understand his  _reasoning_  now, even tended to believe him without the need for him to explain.

He nodded, lifting a smile, now one that he could genuinely pull.

“I know,” was all he said.

And he knew he’d say the same thing over and over again, regardless of how many times he was to comfort him.

He was him after all. And he belonged to him.

Only  _him_.


	115. Love Comes; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love comes in many forms, love comes in many ways – but Noiz only has one way to define it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting intense feelings and inspirations when driving, stuck in traffic is one of the worst things that could ever happen to someone. 100% not recommended. But hey, this idea still needs to be told :’)

Have you ever gotten this feeling as if you are swept off your feet when you simply just… stare at someone? It’s as if they have this magical power that could control your mind, your sensations, your feelings in all sort of ways possible. And even when you are seeking for a solution to escape, to calm that intense surge of emotions within you, there’s no use.

You’re simply hauled into this turbulence of emotions that you could no longer pull yourself off, that holds on to you like its life depends on you.

And you know  _your_  life depends on it too – because you’re just in love; so,  _so_ in love it’s a miracle comes true.

* * *

The streak of blue shades, alongside the glint of vague gold have been something Noiz had yearned to see every time he is to open his eyes. The mere reality of having someone by his side, greeting him with a smile that spelled vigorously of angelic – it’s a reality that’s too good to be true, a joke he’d laugh at himself when the mere thought did as much as flares through his mind. But when his fingers are drawn towards the fine texture of pale skin, when physical contact does funny things to his body, he knows that these were simply just his instinct reminding him over and over again of how  _in love_  he is with him.

The man he loves is no superhuman – he’s simple, yet real. He’s just a man, yet he’s not  _just_  a man. He’s everything Noiz is, yet he’s everything Noiz isn’t. He’s a person who shoves his way into his life and catches him off guard then somersaults his balance and causes him to fall into this abysmal void of world that’s splattered with colours so vivid and bright the black and white he once knew seems too much like a farfetched story at this point.

One simple gesture – one smile, one pat on the head, one nudge on the elbow – is like tying a bond between him and life himself. He never knows of love, let alone life, but the man he loves gives him everything of those – love, then life. It’s like he’s a personification of both, a dream-come-true, a miracle he dares not hope for.

When he hears his name – called with voice so sweet yet firm, a sound so virtuous and so endearing – he thought something is turning his insides upside down.

The man he loves made him realize how he’s more than a walking flesh, that he’s able to possess emotions so intense it’s sometimes too overpowering for him to control. The man he loves gives his life a purpose, pushing the wheel of his rusted fate into full speed again. And then, he finds himself running, no longer running away, but running towards the man, launching himself right into his embrace as if it’s meant for him. The man he loves is everything he never hopes for – yet it’s everything he needs.

“Noiz?”

He looks up, meeting eyes with the familiar pair of light-brown, finding himself melting in the saccharine waves of warmth, of his smile.

“Are you okay? You’re spacing out.”

His voice, a voice so normal yet so powerful – every one of his words rolls into him and sets his veins on fire.

He smiles. “I’m fine.”

It’s amazing how meeting one person could change his life in such a drastic way.

It’s amazing how allowing one person into his life could change him, or rather, return him to who he really is.

It’s amazing how meeting  _Aoba_  could define his world, his life,  _love_.

It’s amazing how  _being in love_  feels like.

“Really?” Aoba quirked a suspicious brow.

And it’s amazing how Aoba could see through him like this –  _just like this_  – knowing him like the back of his hand, knowing him better than himself.

Leaning in, he cups Aoba’s face, thumb stroking against his cheekbones, completely indulging himself in the sensation of Aoba’s soft skin texture.

He wants more – this is not enough.  _Not at all_.

He wants to know more about this person – anything,  _everything_. He wants to know if he’s feeling this intensity within him like how he’s feeling it now. He wants to know his limits, the different expressions he’d make. He wants to see more of his beautiful smile, hear more of his voice, feel more of his skin.

He  _yearns_  for Aoba. He wants to slip under his skin and discover those many parts of Aoba he had not seen yet.

He wants to hear Aoba calling his name, with an expression that could only suggest of happiness – and he wants to be the reason Aoba could be so happy like this.

Kissing him sends sparks all over his body, chills running down his spine, his mind muddled into nothingness – suddenly too much, suddenly too little. Touching him feels like he’s touching something so pure, so  _beautiful_  – something so wonderful that it’s impossible for him to put into words.

It is really okay to feel happiness in such a devastating way like this? Is it really okay to own someone so gorgeous like this?

Is it really okay to be so… alive?

“I love you, Noiz.”

He wants to reply him, tell him he feels the same. But he couldn’t. it’s too much. Just two simple words – but he couldn’t bring himself to say it. He feels as if he’d lose everything if he is to do it. But Aoba knows.

Aoba always knows.

“Let me stay by your side, okay?” he says, his hands on his neck, his forehead pressed against his. He feels as if he could sense Aoba’s emotions now, connecting to his like its flowing through Aoba’s skin and right into his very body.

Ah, so this is love, he wonders.

Love comes in many forms – physically, emotionally, mentally. Love comes in many ways.

But there’s only one type of love he needs – one that spells of Seragaki Aoba.


	116. Same As Ever; Noiz/Aoba

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He would never want to worry Noiz if he could, but sometimes he just couldn’t help it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drunk / sick at the workplace scenario

This was a mistake. Noiz had thoughtfully reminded him that it’s more than fine for him to take a day off for the day, seeing how he literally needed to drag him out of bed in the morning. He felt awfully nauseous when he stood in front of the bathroom mirror, looking up just to have his jaw dropped at the very sight of his pale profile. He held his head in his hands, rubbing his thumbs against his temples, migraine gradually building on the back of his head again.

As he listened to the sound of running water, he closed his eyes, memories from the night before returned into vivid scrutiny. It was another one of those dinners that he wasn’t able to decline, even more so when he was supposed to be Noiz’s assistant, a position that was supposed to be some sort of high ranking in the company he was working in with now even before he knew it himself. He’d reminded Noiz to keep an eye on his alcohol intake, knowing that he’d probably need extra support especially when it came to important socialization. He was sure that Noiz did, because if not, he wouldn’t find themselves leaving the event way earlier than they intended, one arm slung around Noiz’s shoulder as he called for a cab.

He was doing absolutely fine even when they were in the cab, head leaned against Noiz’s shoulder, hand-in-hand, the pleasant smell of cologne lured him to sleep. Noiz woke him up when they arrived, and it was during the moment when he stepped into their mansion that he found the horrendous gush of nausea, running his way into the bathroom and emptying his stomach into the toilet bowl right after before Noiz could say a word. He felt bad for dirtying Noiz’s coat when he came in to check on him, even more so when Noiz helped him out of his own suit and literally carried him into the bathtub. He was lightheaded, his world spun, yet he found comfort when Noiz scoured chary caresses on his flushed-red body, attempting to calm him down.

“I’m… fine,” he uttered, half-conscious.

Noiz leaned in, kissing him on the forehead, before he brushed his lips down to where he found Aoba’s lips.

“Don’t worry,” was all he said before he found hands all over his body, cleaning him up, the immensity of both his mind and his body told him enough that he should leave matters into Noiz’s hands now.

It’s pathetic, but yet, it’s not something he could help. He was well aware of how intolerant he was towards situation like this, and he was sure that Noiz was too. And every time it happened, Noiz never failed to handle him in the most tantalizing way he could: he tucked him in, making sure that the blanket enveloped the whole of him and came back to him, clean and fresh where he cuddled him under the sheets.

“I’m… dirty,” Aoba mumbled, his head pounding, his entire body warm.

Noiz released a light hum. “It’s fine.”

The heat between them intense, not helping when Noiz was so close, hot breath hitting where his neck was exposed. Noiz bit blithely on his hair – but that was all he did. He drifted to sleep feeling something hard poking against his ass, but his mind was at his limit – he’s exhausted, he needed sleep, anything else could wait.

He slumped against the toilet, breathing cripplingly. He felt just a tad better after clearing his stomach for the third time that day but he knew he was nowhere near his best situation yet. Perhaps he should take Noiz’s advice and go home. It’s impossible for him to work in this condition anyway, he’d only create unnecessary troubles to people around him.

Heaving a heavy sigh, he bent, pressing his forehead against his hands and closed his eyes, trying the best he could to calm the intense throbbing in his head.

“Aoba?”

The knocks on the door had him looking up. It’s still working hours now, he shouldn’t be here.

“I’m fine!” he hastily said.

“You’re not.”

Noiz sounded as unruffled as usual, but two years of staying with him had helped Aoba distinguish that vague qualms in his voice as easily as he had always wanted to. He tried to stand, but immediately losing his balance as he toppled and hit his arm hard against the door separating him between Noiz.

“Aoba?!”

“I’m—“

“Open the door,” Noiz cut him off.

“It’s okay, I’m—“

“Open the door.”

There’s no way he could get himself out of this. He unlocked the door, finding it swinging open the moment a soft click was heard, then seeing Noiz rushing into it, still clean and tidy in his working suits.

“D-Don’t come near me,” Aoba retreated, his back hitting the wall in the cramped cubicle. “I haven’t clean myself up yet.”

Noiz frowned, and Aoba was caught in great surprise when he clicked his tongue, then grasping onto Aoba’s wrist before he shut the door with his back.

“Are you really saying that now?” His voice came out as soft whisper, sending instant chills down Aoba’s back.

“…no.”

There’s no winning Noiz. But Aoba couldn’t help it. It’s his instinct, and he sure didn’t want to cause more troubles to Noiz now that he was so obviously coming for Aoba now. Noiz was, undoubtedly, as stubborn as Aoba could be after all.

“I’ll be fine,” he changed the way he spoke. “I feel much better now.”

“Are you sure you aren’t taking a day off?” Noiz asked, the clasp on his wrist quivered ever so slightly.

“…I’ll think about it.”

Noiz sighed. “Don’t push yourself too hard. Take breaks when it’s due.”

Aoba understood what he was trying to say. And he appreciated it greatly. It’s times like this that he needed Noiz to remind him that he’s only human, and that a human’s body had its limit.

“I will,” he smiled. Inching close, he kisses Noiz’s on the lips, just sketchily, just mellifluously. “I’ll head back after this.”

Noiz mirrored his smile, then his kiss. His arms encircled around Aoba’s waist as he pulled him closer, pushing the kiss deeper and drawing air out of Aoba’s lungs as he found his tongue.

Was it because of his own body heat? he wondered. Because Noiz felt warmer than usual and it was treacherous, a kind of seduction so tremendously addicting that Aoba couldn’t help but cupping Noiz’s face so that he could kiss him deeper, more fervently, as if they hadn’t been kissing for years.

“Later,” Noiz parted with profound panting. “Only when you’re feeling completely fine.”

Even at times like this, Noiz  _still_  managed to intrigue Aoba in a way Aoba could never resist. With a pout, he tiptoed, kissing Noiz on the tip of his nose before he pushed him away.

“Alright, alright, I’ll go home now, Mr. Vice President.”

He could feel Noiz’s gaze at his back when he left the toilet, knowing that he was pulling his signature smirk, a sign of profound concern. He smiled. Sure, he looked pathetic having to pull himself to work despite feeling sick like this, but it’s not like he could change how he really was – and that’s precisely why he needed Noiz, a constant reminder of why he should also take care of himself better, so that he could take care of Noiz when he needed him.

Just like how Noiz did.

 


End file.
